


Malfunctioning Time

by Kiragirl17



Series: The Changing Tide of Time [1]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Daddy Issues, F/M, Falling In Love, Fem!Toni, Female Toni, Female Tony Stark, Gender Issues, Genderbending, Love Triangles, Love/Hate, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Protective Bucky Barnes, Protective Pepper Potts, Protective Steve Rogers, Sad Tony, Self guilt, Self-Hatred, Time Travel, Tony Feels, Tony Has Issues, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony-centric, Unrequited Love, Violence, World War II
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-03
Updated: 2015-11-28
Packaged: 2018-02-19 16:37:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 37
Words: 245,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2395343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiragirl17/pseuds/Kiragirl17
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>FemiTony. Time travel. Eventual Steve/Toni. With some Bucky/Toni thrown in there</p><p>Trying to forget that today was March 15 and trying to escape the long lecture from Rogers, Toni locks herself in her lab to work on a new project; however, she never expects her unfinished device to misfire and send her back to the sexist 1940's. </p><p>Now, completely alone with no resources whatsoever, Toni finds herself struggling to survive on her own, especially when she discovers she's being followed. Unsure of who it is and what they want, she struggles to keep them at bay. To make matters worse, she finds herself on Colonel Phillips' radar. However the worst of it, she has to deal with her Egoist Father, who doesn't get the picture and won't leave her the hell alone.</p><p>What a woman to do?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Shadow of the Past

**Author's Note:**

> SO this is a reposting from another site. I wanted to give this site a try.  
> I was trying not to start a new story as it takes me so long to update, but this idea came to me and I couldn't keep it in. Then I wasn't going to publish it... but it wanted out. So here it is.
> 
> And be WARNED this is a genderbender, which I seem to do a lot. This is a FemTony, so if you don't care for that, don't read.
> 
> I do not own Avengers, though I wish.

Chapter 1:

Shadow of the Past

* * *

 

She was pissed. How dare he talk to her like that? Who in the hell did he think he was? He didn't treat Agent Romanoff like this, so why was he treating her like his? She could take care of herself; she had been taking care of herself for years. She didn't need anyone and she really didn't need him. She didn't even know why she was even on this team. Director Fury didn't want her on the team to begin with. He thought she was egoist and riskless, which was true, but she was dying at the time. It still bugged her that he used that to judge her.

Shaking her head, Toni Stark took a deep breath. She wasn't going to let Rogers, no wait, Captain America, get to her. Though she wondered, why was he getting to her in the first place? His insults weren't the first and she knew damn well, they wouldn't be the last, so why did they hit so hard? Why did she care what he thought? If she really thought about it, she knew the answer. Her mind wandered to her father, and how her father talked about him. She knew Captain America was important to her father because he had never shut up about the man. So if someone well-liked by her father hated her, what did that say about her relationship with her deceased father? She didn't have a relationship with her father, and it hurt to know Captain America meant more to her father than she. Why did her father hate her?

As she took a deep breath, Toni told herself to calm down. She tried to focus her mind on something else, because she didn't want to think about her father and her lonely childhood, a childhood that still gave her nightmares.

"Fuck!" she swore as she burnt her hand on the torch. She suddenly dropped the torch as she waved her burnt hand into the air, trying to cool it. After a few seconds, she remembered that the torch was still on. "FUCK!" Without thinking, Toni reached down to turn it off. She fumbled with it as her hand hurt like hell. She didn't need her tower to burn down. "Fuck!" She cursed as she realized which part of the torch she had grabbed. She had picked up the metal mouth with her already burnt hand. "Fuck!" After she had set down the torch, she stared at her hand for a second, watching it turn deep red before reaching for the first aid. She knew this was her fault as she allowed her mind to drift.

"Are you okay, Miss?" The AI, known as JARVIS, asked. "I can alert someone."

"I'm fine," she muttered. "You don't need to call anyone. I got this." She didn't want him to call anyone, because she didn't need anyone. She was fine on her own as she would always be.

Toni, after wrapping her hand, returned to her work. The wrench hurt as she held it in her burnt hand, but she wanted to work on the device, which could fit in her small hands, in front of her. The device, when operational, should be able to shut down all electronics within a 10 foot range. If it worked, she would increase the range to 25 feet or more, but she couldn't get it to work right. It fried electronics and reverse, which she couldn't understand how, the time on her clock by 15 minutes each time it fuzzed. That wasn't what she wanted.

Apart of her didn't want it to work, as it could be used as a weapon. This world ran on power, and to suddenly take that, there would be massive panic. The world could be thrown into darkness. She didn't want to think about the consequences if this got out. So why was she building this? She thought she was out of the weapon business. Shaking her head, she told herself this wasn't a weapon. It was a shield for her team, when they went on dangerous missions. She wouldn't let anyone outside of the Avengers get their hands on it.

"Miss Potts is requesting entry."

Glancing back, Toni held back her scowl as Pepper smiled at her. Note to self, replace glass doors with metal ones. She had no idea why she thought glass doors were a smart idea, because it made it exceptionally hard to hide. "I'm surprise she doesn't just use the code." Pepper was one of the few people, who had code for the door.

"You changed the code."

"Oh," she muttered, forgetting she had done so. She had changed it yesterday, because somehow the jerk, Steve Rogers, had gotten ahold of the code. She didn't want him, well anyone really, to have access to her lab. "Let her in," she ordered as she placed the device down.

Virginia "Pepper" Potts walked in, wearing a silver top and a lace pencil skirt. Pepper could always pull off the pencil skirt, unlike her. Toni couldn't really pull off the girly look, which was why she stuck to jeans and t-shirts. "Are you okay?" she asked as she noticed Toni's badly wrapped hand.

"I'm fine," Toni stated as she hid her hand under the table.

"When's the last time you ate?"

Toni looked up. "I ate breakfast," she said, lying. Toni couldn't recall the last time she ate; heck, she was lucky that she could remember the last time she left her lab. Pepper didn't need to know that. She didn't need that lecture.

Sighing, Pepper looked at her as if she didn't believe her. "Well, I made food. Come upstairs."

Rotating in the chair, Toni turned her attention back to the device, which she still hadn't named yet. She wanted to wait until she got it working before she named it. "I'll take it down here."

"Toni," she started, slowly. "You've to get out of the lab sometimes. You've been down here far too much." She walked to Toni's side, placing a hand on her shoulder. She leaned down a little. "Come eat."

She hated that voice and Pepper knew it, which was why she used it often. It was why she could hardly say no to Pepper. "I'll be up in a few." Both of them knew what that meant: maybe in an hour, but Pepper wasn't going to call her out on it. Calling her out wouldn't help, and she did get Toni to agree, which meant she would be up at some point. She just didn't know when.

Taking a deep breath, she turned away and headed toward that door. "And fix that clock. It's annoying."

Toni turned and stared at the clock, sitting on a tall table across the room. "What are you talking about? I just adjusted it to the right time." Thanks to the malfunctioning device, she had to keep fixing the clock to the right time, because each time the device fuzzed, the clock would jump backward. She didn't know how the clock kept jumping back as it was out of the 10 foot range, but she couldn't really predict the effect of the nonworking device.

"It's ahead by an hour," Pepper stated as she changed direction. She picked up the clock and changed it back to the correct time.

Toni stared at the watch on her wrist; she had set the clock to match her watch, which she could swear by. "Are you sure?" She pulled out her cellphone from her jean pocket and switched it on. When the screen lit up, she noticed the time stamp. It was an hour behind her watch. "Interesting."

After fixing the clock, Pepper turned back to the door. "Come eat, and I'll come get you if you don't come up. I mean it, Toni. Don't test me," she said with a smile.

Putting her phone back into her pocket, she picked up the device and stared. What was going on with this tiny device? "Yes, mother," she teased. Though it was annoying, she was glad Pepper was here to do so.

"When did I sign up babysitting?" Pepper teased back as she walked out of the lab. Toni watched her leave from the corner of her eye, knowing she would be seeing her again.

Sitting there in silence after placing the device down, Toni placed her forehead against the cold metal table for a few minutes. She knew she should get up and get something to eat, because Pepper was right. She needed food. She needed to eat. She was hurting herself by not eating but it wasn't like she was doing it on purpose. She was just busy.

Her stomach had been growling, and she knew she should eat, but she kept telling it to be quiet. She didn't want to go up there. Why couldn't Pepper bring it down? She was forcing her to leave her lab, when she knew Toni didn't want to. She was evil. Toni didn't know who was upstairs, but there was a lecture waiting for her. Her team loved to lecture her, well besides Barton who just laughed at her.

She didn't want to deal with a certain person today, because of what today was. It was March 15, and she knew Rogers would know the importance of that day, because it was the day that her father died. He liked her father unlike her. She couldn't stand her father, and he couldn't understand why, but Toni wasn't going to enlighten him. He didn't have the right to know. He didn't have the right to look into her soul.

Taking off her watch, she adjusted it to the time and stared at it before returning it to her wrist. Standing up, she straightened out her AC/CD shirt and headed out of the lab, because she didn't want Pepper coming after her, even if she had to see him. "Stop being a chicken," she told herself.

Making her way toward the kitchen, she could smell the food, which made her stomach growl more. She knew the smell of Pepper's food, having eaten it for years. Sure, Toni could cook as she had to fend for herself since she was a small child, but Pepper was always the better cook. She didn't know what Pepper did to her food, but she could morph it in something, something more than food. Toni smiled as the door to kitchen came into sight.

"So where's Stark?"

Toni froze at the door as she heard her name. She knew who it was by the tone of his voice: Captain America. He was back early from his mission with Romanoff and Barton; they weren't expected back for at least a few more hours. She wished he had returned when he was supposed to, so she could've sneaked into the kitchen. She hated dealing with him and his insults. Sure since saving the world together, they had an understanding with each other and they did get along, but after a while, she couldn't deal with his high and mighty attitude. It was stupid, but she had started to pick fights with him, when she should've just let things go.

"She's in her lab," Pepper stated in annoyance. "She's always in her lab."

"And too busy to assist us, apparently," Rogers stated, bitterly.

His tone pissed her off. They didn't need her on that mission, which Director Fury had confirmed when she requested she didn't go; however, Rogers thought she was being lazy and selfish, thinking only about herself. In order to avoid a fight with him, she had left the room and went straight to her lab, where she had been ever since. Rogers had tried to come down to talk to her, but she had told him to fuck off, which he did.

"She wasn't needed," Barton said, coming to her defense. "The three of us handled it with no problem."

"If you think about it, they didn't need all three of us," Romanoff stated. "Two of us would've been fine."

"We couldn't have known that. If that base was half as full as it could've been, we would've been screwed," Rogers argued.

He had a point, but they both knew that it wasn't going to be. Their informant was solid; she wasn't needed. She wasn't going to be anywhere that she wasn't needed.

"We weren't, so drop it." Barton sounded annoyed. Barton and Banner were always coming to her defense as they seemed to understand her the best after Pepper and Rhodey.

Rogers didn't respond, but Pepper did, and Toni wished she would've just let it go. "I understand why she didn't want to go. Today is a hard day for her."

"Why?" Barton asked. Toni heard a slap and wondered who in the hell got slapped. She hoped it was Rogers, but she knew it most likely wouldn't have been him. "Why did you hit me?" Barton asked, answering her question.

"Because you're an idiot," Romanoff muttered. "Today is March 15: The anniversary of Howard Stark's death."

"How would you know that?" Barton asked.

"I was Stark's secretary at one point. It was my job to know everything about her," Romanoff, who always sounded annoyed, stated more irritated than usually.

"Wait, that anniversary is today?" Rogers asked, surprised.

Now, that surprised Toni, as he and her fathers were friends. Howard couldn't stop talking about the famous Captain America and how he had stopped the war. Don't get her wrong, he was impressive, and she was a fan girl of him when she was younger, but she was sick of hearing about it all of the time. I thought he knew. She would have thought that Rogers would have wanted to know what happened to his friends. Maybe, their lives after him weren't important to Rogers. Maybe, he was the selfish one.

Hearing footsteps, she guessed they were Pepper's as they were too light to be anyone else. "It is, so please take it easy on her today," Pepper ordered. "Please just let it go. She doesn't want to remember it."

"Why? He's her father," Rogers stated. "He should be remembered."

"She didn't have a good relationship with her father," Romanoff stated. "I can understand, so for her sanity, just drop it." Romanoff wasn't her biggest fan, so it was something to hear her defend Toni.

"He was my friend, you know. He wasn't just her father," he countered.

That pissed her off. Wasn't just her father? Did he think he had a right to her father? Sure, she didn't want him, but that didn't mean she wanted to share him with an ass. She was inching to go in there and punch him in his face, even though she knew that wasn't a good idea. She didn't need to break her already burnt hand.

"Shut it," Barton ordered. "I agree with Pepper. Let's change the subject." He lowered his voice. Toni inched closer to the door, because he was still talking. She wanted to hear what he was saying, but she couldn't make it out. Why would he lower his voice? Did they know she was listening?

Hearing more footsteps, Toni knew someone was walking toward the door. She didn't want them to find her listening, because she didn't want the looks from them and she didn't want to talk about her father. And she really didn't want to speak about it with Rogers, who had already gotten into an argument with her over her father.

Turning back to her lab, she hurried out of there as soon as possible.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Wiping the sweat off her brow, she stood back and stared at her masterpiece. JARVIS had been able to locate some paint via Toni's request, which she had used to paint the glass doors. The doors, which were different shades of red and gold, were no longer see-through, and she was glad. She didn't want anyone to be able to see her. "JARVIS, play High Way to Hell and play it loud." The song played a second later.

She loved that song and she would sing along to it all day. "Living easy, living free… Season ticket on a one-way ride," she sung loudly. She didn't have a singing voice and she knew this, but she didn't care. She just enjoyed singing, even if her voice sounded like nails on a chalkboard. "Asking nothing, leave me be…Taking everything in my stride."

Toni's stomach growled, but she ignored it. "Don't need reason, don't need rhyme. Ain't nothing I'd rather do." She crossed to her work desk, wondering if she could get food delivered to her. Maybe, she could get Happy to pick her up a burger from Burger King. "Going down, party time. My friends are gonna be there too, yeah." But she doubted the gang upstairs would let him through that easy.

She missed her Malibu lab, which came with a garage exit. In this tower, the only way to leave was the now painted doors. "I'm on the highway to hell. On the highway to hell," she sung loudly. Her voice was almost quacking, but she didn't care.

Picking up the device, she reached for the screw driver. She was going to take it a part, because there was something wrong with it on the inside. She was ready to give up on it. "Highway to hell. I'm on the highway to hell." Taking off the metal covering, she stared at the wires.

"No stop signs-" Toni stopped as JARVIS had down turned down the volume. "Hey, what gives?" she asked, demanding answers.

"Captain Rogers and Miss Potts are requesting entrance."

Urgh, she thought. She didn't want to deal with anyone right now. "Tell them no," she answered, trying to listen to her song. It was playing too softly. "And please turn the music back up."

The AI didn't listen to her request. "I have already tried, Miss. They will not listen."

She knew Pepper was going to do this, but she didn't expect it out of Rogers… Okay, she did expect it from him, as he thought he would fix everything, which included her. Even with all of their fights, he thought she was something he needed to fix. "What do they want?"

"Miss Potts wants you to eat and Captain Rogers wants to speak to you."

Toni did want to eat, but she couldn't just take food from them without getting an earful. She stared at the door, wondering if they liked her artwork, which she was very grateful for at the moment. "Tell them I want to be left alone."

"I have already done so."

Toni sighed. "Turn on the speaker."

JARVIS turned off the music completely and turned on the speaker, so Toni could speak with them. She wasn't going to let them in, even if she wanted the food Pepper had.

"Stark, open up," Rogers demanded. Though she would deny it, she liked how he said her name.

Toni rested her head on hands and started at the monitor, which showed the hallway outside the doors. She could see the annoyance on Rogers' and Pepper's face. "And if I say no?" she asked.

They both looked up to the camera, looking almost relied that she answered. "Toni, come out," Pepper demanded.

"No," Toni said firmly, looking at the device. She put the metal casing back on the device.

"Stark, don't be an idiot," he stated. "You can't stay in there all day. You have to come out and eat."

Was that worry in his voice? When did he start caring about her personal wellbeing? Didn't he infer that she was selfish earlier? Why did he change his tone? "I can just order in. Burger King sounds good."

Rogers rubbed his forehead in annoyance. "There's no talking to you, is there?"

"Nope," Toni smiled. He finally understood that she wasn't going to listen. "I enjoy my stubbornness."

"Toni, fine, be stupid," Pepper yelled in frustration. "I'm not going to try then." She turned away and walked up the steps. It hurt to see Pepper work away, but Toni knew this was what she wanted.

"By the way, nice paint job," Rogers stated, drawing her attention back to him. She was surprised he didn't leave with Pepper. "It's something."

"I don't like people watching me." Toni stared at the monitor, trying to figure out what was going through his mind. "What do you want anyways?" His tone changed slightly with the departure of Pepper.

He took a step back from the camera, as he stared at the key pad on the door. "I want to talk. Let me in."

"No," She replied, turning back to the device. She tried to stop her mind from drifting back to the Captain and her father. Why did he want to talk to her? Did he want to talk about her father? Or was it because she wouldn't leave her lab?

"Stark," he started, taking a deep breath. "I know what today is." Nope, it was about her father.

Remaining silence, Toni refused to talk to him about her father. Even if she wanted to, she couldn't talk to anyone about her father. There were times she had wanted to speak with Pepper or Rhodey about it, but each time she opened her mouth, nothing had come out.

"S-Toni," he uttered as he tried some random codes. "Please let me in." He sounded weak, and it almost broke her. The way he said her name did not help as it made her heart miss a beat.

"Captain Rogers, the likelihood that you would guess the code is 1.2342%," JARVIS stated. "It is futile."

Rogers glanced up and smiled. "I like to beat the odds."

Toni stared back the monitor and narrowed her eyes. He had a smile that could light up a room, but that didn't mean she would let him in. However, she had to admire his attitude, even if she could barely stand him.

"How many times do I need to say let me in? 5, 10,15 times? Let me in, please. Talk to me. "

Toni stood up and started to pace. "I don't want to talk about my father!" She yelled. "So just go away."

"You can't keep it in."

"I had been doing that for years." She shook her head, as she took a deep breath. Closing her eyes, she pictured her father, who was always yelling at her for doing something wrong.

"I don't see the issue? Why is there so much anger toward your father? The man I knew-"

Something snapped in her. "The man you knew was a fake!" She yanked open the glasses doors, ignoring the hunger pains, and walked Rogers into the wall. "The man I knew was an ass, who didn't give a crap about me!" She wanted to slap him. "He didn't speak to me unless he had to. He was just too busy to care. Too busy to tell me he loved me or even that he liked me."

"He wasn't like that."

She could feel the Captain's breath. "The man you knew maybe, but he isn't the man I knew." She looked down, not wanting to see his eyes. Toni didn't want to speak to him, but somehow he had gotten her to come out of her lab, when she didn't want out. She didn't want to think about what that meant. "Please just leave me alone. I don't want to talk about him with you, especially you."

Toni was so close to him that she could hear his breathing change and it made her wonder if she had gotten to him. Sure, she had insulted him, but she didn't think those insults had affected him as much as that statement did. It made her feel guilty, and she hated to feel guilty.

"Why do you push people away?" he asked softly. His back was against the wall and there was nowhere to go as Toni had him pinned. His hand grazed her arm as he was unsure of what to do with it.

The contact made her want more. "I dislike people." It was the truth. She had never gotten along with other people, and it always got her in trouble. She had learned that it was best if she was alone, and that was why it was hard for her to be on this team. She wasn't use to the backup.

"Fine, I'll leave. Stark, have fun being alone," he replied, as he placed his hands on her small shoulders and pushed her back softly, which Toni allowed him to do so. As he walked away, he stated, "There's food upstairs. You should eat."

"Don't tell me what to do!" she snapped. Toni watched him leave before she turned back to her lab. "JARVIS, I do not want any other interruptions." She returned to her chair. "Turn the music up loud. I don't want to hear myself think." The AI did as she wished this time and turned the High Way to Hell up so loud that Toni knew they would hear it upstairs, but she didn't care.

She also didn't care that her hunger pain was getting worse, because her emotional pain was greater and she didn't know how to deal with it. She never knew how to deal with it, because she wasn't taught to. In her family, emotions were for the weak, so she hid them. She acted the way she did to hide that she was hurting. She allowed herself to get lost in her playgirl egoist image, so no one could see the truth.

Taking a deep breath, she turned back to the device. "What if I give this thing more power? The lack of power must be the reason why it isn't working. Everything should be working." She had to yell for JARVIS to hear her.

"I would not suggest that," JARVIS stated, "There would be no telling what it would do to your chest piece if you increased the power."

Though the device even with increased power could not bypass the 10 foot range, she couldn't know predict what would happen to the electronics within the range. Toni looked down at her chest piece and wondered if it would withstand the device. She had taken steps to make sure her Arc Rector would withstand the wave, but there was always a change that it wouldn't. There was a part of her that didn't care about the risk to the Arc Rector, and that scared her. Why didn't she care for her own life? "It'll be fine."

"If you say so."

Toni smirked. "I do. If anything does, I give you permission to alert the others." She knew even without permission that JARVIS would alert the orders.

"Yes, ma'am." There was a pause. "It would be best to wait for Mr. Banner's return."

She knew the reasoning behind that as Banner was the only one scientist in the group besides her. If something were to go wrong, he would be the only one who could save Toni. No one else had any idea of how her chest piece worked besides him. The scientists at SHIELD could only guess of how it worked. "He isn't due back for few more days, and you know how impatient I am."

"Yes, Miss Stark. I do know how impatient you are."

"Then let's get started," She stated with a smile, but that smile would not last long. In a few minutes, she would regret not listening to JARVIS.


	2. Danger in Playground

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like this chapter. :)

Chapter 2:  
Danger in the playground

* * *

 

Pepper had left soon after she had come up from the lab, and it was clear that Toni had pissed her off as she had stormed out of the Tower without a word. Steve had come up from lab a few minutes later and headed directly to the couch in front of the fire pit. He didn't say much, a clear sign that Toni had pissed him off too which was hard to do.

"So Stark isn't coming up?" Natasha asked as she left the well-stocked bar.

Steve stared in the non-lit fire. "No, I do not think she will." He was thinking about something, and after a few seconds of silence, he spoke again. "I really don't understand her. How can she be so careless?"

Clint walked into the room. "It's who she." He eyed Natasha, as she walked to the chair beside the couch and sat down. She had a drink in her hand. "She isn't use to having so many people, who would care if she died, looking out for her." He crossed to the bar to get himself a drink.

Natasha glanced toward Clint. "Did you to get into another fight with her, Rogers?"

"Yes," Steve answered.

"You know, it's never a good thing, when Mother and Father are fighting," Clint teased, crossing to the window. The view was amazing and Clint could understand why Toni built the tower here. "It does a team no good. Maybe, you two should just make up already. Or not, angry sex is the best kind of sex there is."

Steve turned suddenly, almost falling off the couch. "Wait….What?" Natasha laughed, which was rare. "Is he inferring that Stark and I are…?" he asked, turning to Natasha. Clint started laughing, seeing Steve's face was blood red. "We haven't done anything. We're just friends…" He paused and looked around, trying to locate a good spot to stare. "There's nothing going on between us…"

Natasha and Clint laughed louder. "I like how worked up he's getting," Clint crossed to his teammates. "Are you sure, Captain?"

"There's no fonduing between us!" He hid his cherry face.

"Fonduing? Is that what the kids are calling it?" Clint grinned. "Fonduing? Natasha, want to fondue?"

Natasha stopped laughing and turned her attention back to Steve. "Barton just meant you and Stark are leaders of this group, and it's not a good thing when you two fight."

"Oh," Steve muttered. "Why didn't you just say that?" His face slowly returned to its normal color.

"It-" Loud music started to play. "-is what I said," Clint finished, turning to the door. "What the hell? Is she going to have ear drums after tonight?"

Natasha took a deep breath. "What did you say to her to upset her this much?" She narrowed her eyes at Steve.

Steve turned to her and returned her glare. "What makes you say that?

She brought her hand to her face in disbelieve. "I don't know. By the way you entered the room and the loud music coming from the lab? She doesn't play this shit loud unless she's upset."

The Captain stood up and walked to the bar. Though it was impossible for him to get drunk, he would try. It was after he poured himself a glass of whiskey that he answered her. "Why is this mine fault? I didn't do anything to her. It isn't my fault that no one can talk to her."

Clint glared. "You just like to bring up shit that she doesn't want to talk about, so yea, I blame you." He moved toward the door. The music was louder in the hall way.

Steve slammed the glass down, breaking it. "I'm not sorry that I want to mourn a friend. I have every right to do so, but I am sorry that I'd upset her. I thought she would want to talk about it." He looked for a trashcan so he could clean up his mess.

"You know she didn't. You have heard what Pepper said," Clint stated, leaning against the door.

After finding a trashcan, he started to pick up the glass, careful not to cut himself. "I know. That's why I went down to the lab."

Natasha picked up a book. "You're an idiot. You scared her away earlier, when she had come out to eat, which is something that she needs, and now you have her locked in her lab." She stared at a few pages before putting it back down.

"We don't really know if she overheard us earlier," Steve countered as he reached for a towel to wipe the liquid. The expensive Whiskery, as Toni wouldn't buy anything cheap, smelled strong.

Clint and Natasha both turned to him and were glaring. "I think he doubts our assassin skills, Nat."

"Yea, I don't know how I feel about that," she admitted, eyeing him. Her hand played with the handle to her gun, which was still holstered. She hadn't disarmed, which was rare if she did, because she was hardly without a weapon.

"Maybe, we should show him," Clint grinned. He didn't reach for his weapons, but he was equipped.

"Yes, I agree."

Steve looked between them with scared look him his eyes. "Are you two serious? I'm not going to fight teammates over something stupid."

"You were-" Clint started to say.

He stopped as Pepper had entered the room looking for something. "Have you seen my phone?" she asked looking around to the three avengers. "I need it. I'm waiting for an important phone call."

Happy to change the subject, Steve spoke up first, "Weren't you going home? Can't you just use your home phone?"

"Half way home, I noticed I forgot my cell phone. I need my cell phone. The house phone won't do for business call I am waiting for. Have you seen it anywhere?" Pepper bit her lip, as she glanced around the room. Sighing, she walked to the bar where Steve was standing. "Did you break a glass?" she asked as she noticed the wet counter and small pieces of glass. He nodded. "Just be careful, I don't need anyone to get cut."

"I will, ma'am," he watched her.

"Ah, there it is," she stated. Pepper, who seemed to be in a much better mood than when she left, smiled as she picked up the phone and placed it in her purse. She looked around the room, noticing the tension. "Is there something wrong?"

"The idiot got into a fight with Toni after you left," Clint answered.

Steve sighed. "I wish you would stop calling me that."

"Well if the shoe fits wear it." The three avengers were glaring at each other.

"I swear I'm not a baby sitter, and I refuse to be one," Pepper stated as she walked to the door. "The Avengers are children."

Natasha stood up. "Not all." She did not want to be included in that.

"Hey, wait." Pepper turned back to Steve. "How did you get into a fight with her? She's in her lab and she isn't coming out." She stared him down like no one else could do. "And that would explain the music." She rubbed her ears.

Setting the trash back on the ground, Steve took a deep breath. "I got her to come out…but-"

"You got her to come out?" Pepper asked shocked.

"But it didn't last. I pissed her off and she stormed back in." He rubbed the back of his head, because he knew he had made it worse. "I put my own foot in my month."

"He's an idiot when it comes to women. No wonder he can't get laid," Clint pointed out. "Dumbass."

Steve took a step forward as Clint insulted him again. "You remind me of a bully," he stated, irritated. Clint took a step forward, staring down Steve. "You know you can't take me in a real fight so you have to throw insults."

"If anyone sounds like a bully, it's you," Clint responded, as both Steve and he closed the distance between them.

Pepper was annoyed. "How can you people be a team?" she asked, moving out of the way. Something was going to happen and she wanted nothing to do with it. One, it would be deadly, and two, they weren't her responsibility; Toni was.

Natasha noticed the increase tension and jumped between them. "Guys calm down. You-"

The music stopped, but it didn't remain silent. An earsplitting alarm sounded through the whole tower. Blinking yellow lights, which came out of nowhere, lit up the whole room.

"What the fuck is that?" Clint asked as he covered his ears, and he wasn't the only one.

Pepper was panicking as she knew what this alarm meant. "JARVIS! What happen? Is Toni okay?" she yelled as loud as she could. If she didn't, there was no way he would have heard her.

"What's this?" Natasha hissed. She held her hands firmly against her ears. "Is there an intruder?"

"JARVIS, turn this shit off!" Clint ordered. "If there was an intruder, I think the sound would've killed him. What kind of home alarm is this?"

"It is against protocol. It cannot be turned off," the AI responded.

"Then just turn it down, so we can think," Steve responded.

"Very well," JARVIS responded. The yellow lights were still flashing annoyingly, but the earsplitting alarms had died down, almost to a murmur.

Steve, who hands had left his ears, turned to Pepper, but she wasn't there. She had bolted out of the room, heading toward the lab. "Wait! What's going on? Is Toni in trouble?" He chased after Pepper, and he wasn't alone. Clint and Natasha had followed, knowing something had to be wrong.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Pepper, who was the slowest of the four, was the first to arrive as the other had allowed her to. They weren't going to fight her mothering instinct, and she was the only one who truly understood what was going on. "Shit," she cursed as the lab doors came into view. The painted glass doors had been replaced.

Steve stared at where the glass doors were supposed to be. "Wait, what is this?" From floor to ceiling, metal doors blocked the lab entrance. In big block bright yellow lettering, the word caution was plastered against the huge metal doors.

Clint knocked against the door, noting how strong it was. "This does not look good."

Natasha stood back. "I remember Stark telling me about this. She told me that if the lab closed itself off like this, it wouldn't be good." She took a deep breath. "She said, while laughing, she would most likely be dead or worse." There was a grim expression on her face.

Pepper stared at Natasha before slamming her fists on the door. "JARVIS, let us in!" Before she could hit the cold metal again, Steve stopped her. She glanced at him from the corner of her eye, ignoring the stinging in her hand. "Let us in!" she ordered, pulling her hand away from Steve.

"I cannot allow that, Miss. Potts," the AI stated. No one could get use to the disembodied voice as it came out of nowhere.

"Why not?" Steve asked. "Stark could be hurt!"

"The lab is under lockdown and no one is allowed in until a full scan is completed," JARVIS stated. "That is the protocol that Miss Stark had written."

Clint glared at the ceiling, not knowing where to glare. It was annoying not having anything physical to yell at, when he was pissed, and he was pissed. "What the hell happened?"

"The Device that Miss Stark had been working on was suddenly activated and everything within a 10 foot range has disappeared," it stated.

If she wasn't frightened before, she was now; Pepper's expression was pure fear. "Let us in! I need to see Toni."

In anger, Steve slammed his fist into the metal shield, denting it. "Toni could be hurt! Open these doors right now." He slammed his fist again in the same spot, but the metal did not break.

"Captain Rogers," JARVIS started, "there would be no point as she is not located in the lab, and it is impossible for me to go against Miss. Stark's protocol."

Natasha took a step forward. "What do you mean she's not in there?"

"She was the ten foot range."

Clint flexed his fist. "What does that mean? Where is she?"

"I do not know of Miss Stark's location. She is not in the tower," JARVIS answered. "I also do not have any record of her leaving the tower as well."

"How can that be? She was in lab before the Device went off and now she's not?" Pepper asked. "Can you tell us anything? Is she alive?" Her voice was shakily.

"When can we be let into the lab?" Natasha asked, eyeing Pepper. She was a trained assassin and she didn't like the what if's game. She needed facts.

"In 3 minutes and 53 seconds."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

The metal doors squeaked as they retracted slowly, revealing the painted doors. Pepper, the first one to make it to the door, tried to pull it open, but they would not open. "JARVIS, unlock the lab now."

"Yes, Miss Potts," he stated. The key pad on the glass doors blinked and the door flew open.

The four walked in and each one of their hearts stopped at the sight of the lab. There in the middle of the lab, where Toni's desk was supposed to be, was a big hole in the floor in a perfect circle. Nothing else in the lab was disturbed, and it wasn't for the big hole in the ground, no one would ever know something was wrong.

Steve was the first to move. "Is the floor steady?" he asked, unsure of his steps. "The floor is not going to cave in, is it?"

"If it was unsafe, you would have not been let in, Captain," the AI stated.

The Captain nodded and inched closer. Lowering to his knees, he studied the hole, which had no sharp edges; everything had a smooth cut. "What are the chances that she's alive?" he asked, his voice was shakily. He could see the room below.

Pepper was shocked by his question. "She has to be alive." She looked around; there were no signs of blood. "There would be signs if she's dead."

Natasha put her hand on Pepper's shoulder. "Anything is possible, right JARVIS."

Clint's eyes wandered around the hole. It was very interesting, because JARVIS was correct. Everything just vanished, and that was strange. There were no displaced tiles, broken pipes or anything. It was a clean cut. There were no evidence that anything besides a hole was ever there. "Is there anything you can use to track Toni?" Clint asked.

Pepper looked up. "She turned her cell on. I saw her do it. You can track her by that!"

The AI didn't respond at first. "I cannot track Miss Stark's phone."

"Why can't you?" Steve asked. He had no idea of how to do that, but he knew it can be done.

"In order to track a phone, it needs to be on or be intact," Clint responded. "And let me guess, Toni's phone is either broken or not on."

"Yes."

"Crap," Natasha cursed.

 


	3. Broken Will

**Chapter 3:**

**Broken Will**

* * *

 

Toni's head felt like it was on fire, while her lungs felt like there was a brick on her chest. "Urgh," she muttered painfully; her throat felt like sand. Every part of her hurt and she thought she was going to die from the pain. She was familiar with pain as she had experience it before, but this was something different. Something completely different.

Laying on her side, Toni tied to push herself up, but her arms could not support her. Pain shoot through her left arm, making her wonder if it was broken. "Ja.." she tried to call out. Her voice died in throat.

Her eyes lids felt heavy as she tied to open her eyes. "L-lights," she stuttered. She could barely make out anything in the darkness and Toni wasn't sure if was her eye sight or the lights.

"I s-said lights, J-JARVIS," she said. The darkness couldn't be just her eyes, because she could make out odds shapes. Is that the moon? She thought to herself. Did she blow up the ceiling? That would explain why she was in so much pain. "Urgh," she muttered again as pain shot through her head. Out of reflex, her hand flew to her head, and it was wet. Why is my head wet? Did a pipe break? She knew that wasn't right. Water wasn't sticky. She knew she bleeding, and she knew it was bad. It had started to drip down her face.

She had to get help and it was obvious that Jarvis wasn't going to. "S-stupid AI," she muttered. She tried to push herself up again, but she didn't make it. She fell harder again the cold ruff titles. She tried to look up at the moon, so she could focus, but when she looked up, everything started to spin. Her fuzzy vision had gotten worse. Black spots filled her vision. She started to shake as she felt the wind pick up. What happened to the walls? The walls should have provided some kind of protection. Maybe the Device did more damage to the building than she thought, and that frightened her. Her teammates were in the Tower, and she didn't want anything to happen to them.

"He-help," she called out, trying to yelling, but it wasn't anything more than a whisper. She couldn't stay on the ground, waiting for them, because they could be hurt worse than she. Using her fear, she pushed herself up with one arm and looked around. Everything was still fuzzy, but she could make out a few things. Her broken desk and chair lay a few feet from her. The Device, which seemed to be one piece, was a few feet in front of her. The title floor, which looked like it had fallen from the sky, was no longer whole.

Shaking from the wind and weak muscles, Toni struggled to push herself to her knees with one arm. Her left arm was pretty much useless. I can do this, she thought as blood dripped from her head. Her mind started to go and it was getting harder to think. "H-help," she begged, her throat screaming in pain. Her breathing, if possible, was becoming more difficult, which made her take hollow breaths. It hurt to breath in deep.

Her fear had turned to panic as she noticed the fading light coming from her Arc Reactor. No, she cried, as there was nothing she could do. She had never felt so alone and weak. Even when she was tortured for her weapons, she had Yinsen, who had saved her life, but now, the only thing keeping her alive was going out, and there was no one, who could help her. She wouldn't call for help, even in her own house, her home.

Her mind started to go to the dark side. Someone should've come to her; JARVIS should've alerted the Avengers that one of their own was down, but they weren't there. Why did everyone abandon her?

She was going to die alone, which she always knew was going to happen, but she thought maybe she could beat that, since she now had friends. Maybe, she was wrong… Though she was glad that the pain would stop if she died, she didn't want to die and leave Pepper to find her body.

"Help," she yelled, as her body gave out. She fell hard against the ground again, and this time, she didn't try to get up. She was giving up, and she was okay with it for the first time in her life. She had given up before, but that was different. Now, she was done. She was done trying and she was okay with that.

I deserve this for- She never finished her thought as a voice interrupted her peaceful death.

"Miss, are you okay?" She could hear the stranger run to her and she could feel his hand on her. "Please answer me."

Toni shifted so she could glance up at her savior; it was Rogers, and the sight of him made her heart skip… She blinked. He looked different; he looked smaller. Since when did Captain America look like a shrimp? Was the pain really clouding her vision? She wasn't an idiot; she knew she had a concussion, because she had a hard time keeping her mind focus and her head was bleeding. The blood was a big clue. "R-Rogers," she struggled, "what h-happened to you? Y-you…are s-shrimp."

The little Captain lowered himself down to her. "I…I have always been this size," he stated, unsure of himself.

"Don-" Her throat burned. Maybe, she should just shut-up, because she was just hurting herself now. Plus, the lack of air in her lungs cut off her ability to speak.

"Miss!" he sounded startled. "Stay with me, please. Please, stay awake."

Toni had tried to focus on him, but the dark spots started to form in her vision. She closed her eyes. She would focus on his voice, his calm relaxing safe voice. She would never admit it, but she loved to listen to his voice. No, she didn't care for what he said half of the time, but his voice calmed her. She loved its tone and how innocent it sounded. "I-I…c-can't," she stated.

"Someone help, please!" he yelled. "Help!"

She could not get over the pleading in his voice, wondering why he was letting his fear soak through. He was trained to hide his fear when speaking, and though she knew he had fears, she never heard it in his voice. Yes, she had heard annoyance and anger, but not fear. Hiding his fear from his tone, he was able to keep his team calm, which was what she needed. Did her state really frighten him?

Toni felt his hand leave her body, and she feared that she would not feel a comfort of a friend again. Yes, she considered the Copsicle a friend, even if it didn't look like it. She tried to turn her head and see where he had gone, but she couldn't keep her eyes open. "S-Steve," she called out. It wasn't louder than a whisper and there was no way he could have heard him call out.

"Lady!" she heard him call for her, and she could heard more than one voice, but she didn't have time to think about who else it could have been as she had blacked out.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

When Toni came to, she knew she was in the hospital and not her tower by the smell and feel of the bed. One reason why she hated hospitals was the beds, which were uncomfortable, smelly, and cheap. Sure, she knew it was a waste of valuable funds, but still. They could at least try, right?

She squeezed her eyes shut as the pain flew through her body. The meds must be wearing off. She tried to move her arms to call the nurses for more meds, but her left arm was in a sling, a clear sign that it was broken. The other was handcuffed to the bed's railing as if she was a criminal. What the fuck? Why would they treat me like that? Sure, she knew she pissed SHIELD and the Avengers off and always had an act of sneaking off, but did they really have to handcuff her? Did they not trust her?

"Guys? This isn't funny," she asked, her throat still burned. The pain almost overtook her. She really needed another dose of medication. She pulled at the handcuffed, but it didn't do anything, and it was stupid to think it would. However, that really didn't stop her as she pulled harder.

"Miss, please calm down," a nurse came flying in.

Toni stared at the woman, who came in with a needle. What the fuck was she wearing? It appeared to be a 1940's something nurse's uniform, which consisted of a white dress with an ugly collar and sleeves and a light blue sweater. "What are you wearing?" She asked. No present day nurse would wear that shit and she knew damn sure SHIELD didn't have facilities like this, noticing how old the room looked like.

"It's called a uniform," the women responded as if Toni was an idiot. She poked her with the needle.

Toni felt her mind start to go a little as the meds started to take over. "A hideous uniform."

The nurse smiled. "If you want to talk about hideous, you should've seen the clothes they brought you in or wait you did." She marked down something on her chart and walked out of the room.

Ouch, Toni thought as she wanted to leap out the bed and attack the unnamed nurse. No one insulted Toni Stark and got away with it, but…right now, she had no choice. She had to take it as she was handcuffed to the bed…and no, it wasn't as fun as the last time she was handcuffed to a bed.

Laying back, she stared at the ceiling and tried to think about her situation, but her stupid hair was irritating her. She had wanted to chop it off, but Pepper wouldn't let her. That woman wouldn't let her do anything and it was exasperating. Toni was a grown ass woman… Urgh! She thought. Since one of her arm was broken, the other was handcuffed and her body was stiff, she was forced to blow her medium black hair out of her face; however, it really wasn't working. Giving up on blowing her hair out of the way, she forced her mind back to work.

She had to figure out where she was and who had her. This hospital room looked nothing like any hospital she been in or seen. It looked like it came from the 1930's or 40's, just like that ugly nurse. The device, which monitored her vitals, looked ancient, and that scared her. If her captors were using out of date equipment, it wasn't good. Maybe, she was a prisoner for some third world villain, but that didn't explain the Captain. Rogers wouldn't betray her, even if she pissed him off.

Then what else could this be? Her mind wandered to the Device she created. Could it be the reason why she was here? One idea came to mind, but that wasn't possible, especially when that wasn't what she had been trying to do. Shaking her head, she paused on the thought. That could be the reason why her never wrong watch, which was missing from her wrist, was wrong…so maybe, it was possible. How else could she explain the 1940's shit and the Shrimp? She thought she imagined the tiny Captain...

The door to her hospital room flew open and a man in military uniform walked in. He was also wearing a 1940's uniform, which added to Toni's theory. Though this could be some giant joke, she wouldn't understand the point of that. Why would anyone try and make someone think they were in the past? What purpose would that solve?

He looks familiar, Toni thought as she took in the Colonel, which she could tell by his uniform. He was an older man, who was balding. "Ello, Colonel," she smiled, trying to figure out where she knew him from. The meds were making it harder for her to remember.

He stared at her. "So what can I call you? Jane Doe does not seem fitting for this conversion." He took the chair form the corner of the room and set down next to the bed.

"Being handcuffed doesn't seem fitting either," she asked, raking her brain for an answer. "So why am I in military custody?"

The Colonel had seen the worst of war. "What can I call you?" He asked, sitting down.

"Toni," she offered. If she was in the past, she wasn't going to give him her last name, and if this was some kind of joke, her captors should already know who she was. No one could forget a face like hers.

"No last name, Toni?" he asked, sounding annoyed as he tapped his fingers against his leg. He didn't have time for this.

"Why am I here, Salty?" she asked. He was fishing for something and she didn't want anything to do with it. "What do you want from me?" She was never the one to beat around the bush.

He looked at her. "The name is Colonel Phillips."

It came at her like a pound of bricks. Howard used to talk about him, whenever he talked about Rogers. This man had helped to produce Captain America. Sure, he wasn't Dr. Abraham Erskine, the man who had created the famous Captain, but he was one of the reasons why the project existed. "Well, Colonel Salty, why am I here?" she teased. He seemed like a salty character to her.

He narrowed his eyes. "You were found trespassing on private property, where it looked like a small bomb went off."

"Isn't that something for cops? And not the US Military?" What could this man want? He wanted something, and Toni didn't want any part in it.

He learned forward and pulled out a clear bag and a yellow envelope. In the clear bag was her cell phone, and in the other were photos of her stupid device. "These are the only things were found on you, and they aren't like anything we seen before."

Toni wasn't one to carry ID as everyone knew who she was and she never needed it. If she did need it, Pepper was the one who always carried it. In this case, she was really glad she didn't. She didn't need him to locate that ID. "They are something I'm working on." What else could she say to that? Where is the Device? She asked herself, not liking that it wasn't here. She didn't need it in the wrong hands.

"I assume this is a communication device," he stated as he stared at the smart phone. "I can't quite get it to work, but that isn't what I am interested in."

She stared at him. Sure, she needed to get her phone back as it obtained information from the future, but she was more concern about her unnamed device. "Where's my other device?" she asked. She needed that device in order to get home. She didn't know how she was going to do it, but she knew that the device was the key… When did she start believing that she was in the past?

"Mr. Stark has it," he stated as he put her phone back into the bag. "I'm sure you know who that is." He put the photo in her lap.

"Of course," Toni snapped. She didn't want her father anywhere near her device, and she would do anything to get it away from him short of killing him.

Phillips laughed. "I see you don't like him, but you're not the only one." He paused. "Is there a reason why?"

Sure, he would be laughing; she bet everyone was laughing at her. Was this some kind of joke from God? "You have taken my private property. I demand it back."

"You don't have a right to demand to have it back."

"I am a United States citizen. You don't have the right to do this to me." Toni was pissed. She knew his title give him the right to do whatever he deemed fit, but that didn't mean he can use that authority on her.

"I don't know if I believe you. You seem like a spy to me, with all of these strange contraptions of yours. Are you working with Hitler?" He asked, seriously. He took a look down at her chest.

"NO!" she denied. Wait, is he looking at my chest? She though, annoyed. "Hey, buddy, my eyes are up here," she said, trying to point at her face. Sure, she didn't mind when men looked at her chest, but that was only when she allowed it. She didn't care for it here.

The Colonel looked insulted. "I was not. I was looking at that thing in your chest." He pointed to the Arc Reactor.

Toni, who had forgotten about her chest piece in her confusion, looked down. She felt like an idiot. How could she forget about that? It was the keeping her alive. "My reactor," she muttered, closing her eyes. When she was in the empty lot, something she could tell from the photos, the reactor was fading in and out. Opening her eyes, she glanced down. It wasn't fading, but it wasn't as bright as it usually was. The Device must've drained it. I should've listen to JARVIS, she thought, feeling stupid. The Arc Reactor was barely visible through the hospital gown, and that wasn't a good sign.

"This reactor," he started, using her word, "is very interesting. It's intergraded into your body. Why is that?" He learned forward in his chair. "When the doctors found that thing, you freaked out not letting them look at it. You had knocked out a few nurses, yelling at them not to touch it."

"I don't remember that," Toni stated.

"You can blame that on the concussion and, the fact that you were out for a week," he stated. "Anyhow, Dr. Erskine and Mr. Stark stated that the piece is keeping you alive." He leaned back in his chair. "So why do you have it in your chest?"

Howard had been here? He had seen her? Closing her eyes, she tried to relax herself, because if her breathing kept at this pace, she would go into a panic attack. Toni Stark did not have panic attacks. "Howard was here?" she asked.

Phillips wasn't an idiot by any shot and noticed her reaction to Stark's name. "He was, and he was quite interested in taking a look at your reactor. He would like to talk to you about it."

"No," she stated firmly.

"You won't have a choice on that."

"We'll see about that." Toni wasn't going to talk to her father.

He stood up and crossed to the windows. "You have never answered my question." Phillips looked back, staring at her for a few minutes. "Why would such a pretty young thing have that in her chest?"

Toni was used to fake comments. "It keeps me alive. That's all you need to know." She wasn't going to go into the history of the reactor with his man or her father.

Sighing, he walked to the door. "I see you aren't going to cooperative with us. I wanted to do this the easy way. I would like not to interrogate a woman. "

Toni snorted, because she hated the easy way. She liked making things difficult. "If you knew me, you would understand. I won't tell you anything and your male chauvinist ways won't help you, asshole." She didn't know what he was looking for, but she knew she wasn't going to give him anything.

"You have a mouth." He took a deep breath. "So be it," he stated as he walked out of the door.

That had the genius worried. She wasn't an expert on 1940's law, but she was sure she wouldn't like the power it gave him. In her time, the law was there to protect the people, but in this time, there was a war going. This country was afraid of Hitler and they would authorize anything to protect themselves.

"This isn't good," she stated. Her throat felt worse than before; she should've just shut-up. "Urgh," she muttered, pulling at the handcuffed. Maybe, she could pick it like she did before when one of her dates left her handcuffed to the bed. It took her a few hours, but she was able to escape. She could have sworn JARVIS was laughing at her that night.

Fighting through the soreness of her body, she pulled herself into a sitting position and looked around. "What can I use escape this place?" On the dresser in a corner of the room, something caught her attention, but how could she get it? She was tied down.

Kicking off the blanket, Toni shuffled herself to the railing and felt for the leveler to release it. After a few minutes of struggling, she felt the leveler and pushed it in. The railing fell, pulling her down with it. Pushing herself up a little, she stared at the heart monitor. Will these machine alarms go off if I pull these off my chest? If they did, her escape would be blown, but she had to risk it.

After a few seconds, she pulled off the wires and watched the door. As soon as it was clear that no one was coming, she kicked her legs over the bed and stood up. "Fuck," Toni muttered, as she fell straight to the cold hard ground. Her legs hadn't been able to support her weight. She closed her eyes as pain sailed through her body.

Toni took a deep breath, because she knew she could do this. She had to do this, because if she didn't, she would be screwed. Colonel Phillips would be back and he wouldn't be gentle. He wanted answers and he would do anything to get them. She didn't like that idea.

She studied the bed, which didn't have wheels. She would either need to detach the railing of bed or drag the bed, but the latter would be noisy. Someone would hear and stop her, which she could not have. Laying down on her back on the floor, she fought her reflex to jump up. Though her gown was covered more than it did in the future, the back of the gown was still open. Stupid gowns, she thought.

Toni grimaced, forcing her broken arm to move. She wiggled her figures, making sure her hand was still working. Since they were, she knew she could still use them, even if she couldn't extend her arm. However, this bed was made better than she thought, and there was no way she could detached it without tools.

She pushed herself onto her knees and stared at the photos on the bed. She needed to get the device as she had to get it away from her father, who could be screwing it up. He would figure it out sooner or later because of who he was. Sure, she had invented more items than he, but if he was in living in her time, there was no doubt that he would be taking her to school. And she hated that.

Taking a deep breath, she noticed the monitor's plug. I can use that, she thought. She reached for cord and yanked it, catching it in her broken arm. Using her nails, she pulled apart the plug, so she would use the little wires inside. After freeing some of the wires, she turned her attention to the handcuffed. "Fuck," she muttered. God was really playing a joke on her, wasn't he? It was going to difficult to pick free her right hand, using her right hand, but she was going to try. After a few minutes of struggling with it, she had given up using her right hand. Passing the wires to her left hand, she hoped she could do this.

Holding the handcuffed still as best as she could, she struggled getting her left hand into the correct motion. After a few seconds, she took her arm out of the sling, which gave her a little more movement, but the cast was heavy and it hurt to hold it in one place. Toni didn't have a choice; she had to do this and she had to do this now, because she didn't know when she would get another shot.

"Yes," she cheered as the handcuff fell from her hand. Giving standing another try, she pushed herself to her feet, and for a few seconds, she thought she was going to land back on her ass, but she didn't. She felt a breeze on her back as she walked toward the dresser. The thing turned out to be a pen, which could be helpful later if used correctly. "I have to do something about this gown thing."

Toni found another grown and put it on backward to cover her butt. She inched to the door, trying to hear if someone was outside the door. She couldn't hear anything from the other side, but she wasn't sure. The silence could be because there was no one there or she just couldn't hear through the wall.

"Oh, shit," she thought as the door swung up.

The ugly nurse from before came walking to the room with a food tray. When she noticed the empty bed, she dropped the tray and food went everywhere. "Doc-"

She never finished her sentence as Toni grabbed her from behind. After scuffling for a few minutes, they both ended on the ground. "Calm down," Toni whispered as she rolled on top. She had been trained to defend herself, but it was challenging with a broken arm.

"Gua-"

The nurse tried to yell out for help, but Toni couldn't allow her to do that. She knocked her out using cast. "Urgh," she shrieked in pain. She stood up and glanced outside to see if anyone was coming. When she saw no one was coming, she closed the door and turned her attention back to the nurse. She started to undress the nurse. "Now, listen. I'm not going to mess with you. I just need the uniform so I can sneak out of here."

She took a deep breath. "It isn't that you're ugly….or wait it is," she chucked. She switched their clothes and walked out of the room with her head held up high.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni had been lucky lately, running into a few people who didn't pay much attention to her, but she didn't have much time. The medical staff and the military personnel would soon notice her disappearance or the screaming nurse, who would wake up soon. She needed to get out of this place before that, but it was like a maze. She had no idea of where the front door was, and there was a good shot that they would find her before she made it.

Rounding a corner, she saw Colonel Salty speaking with Howard Stark, and she froze, unable to motivate herself to move. Howard, who looked different from what she remembered, appeared to be healthy and happy, which Toni couldn't remember in her time with him. He hardly showed a smile, and the last time she saw him, he looked worried and tired about something that Toni wasn't aware of. He didn't speak to her about his troubles.

Howard appeared to be in his early twenties, but Toni couldn't guess his age without knowing the year. It had to be before 1943 as Steve Rogers wasn't Captain America yet. Her mind wandered to Rogers, who she would love to meet before serum. What would he be like? Would he still be a chauvinist ass? Okay, she knew he wasn't a total ass; he was a standup guy. And she knew he had been before the serum because Dr. Erskine wouldn't have picked him if he wasn't. Captain America couldn't be anything but great.

Shaking her head, she returned her attention to the two men in front of her, who had not notice her yet. She had to get away, before they did. If they did, she would be in handcuffs again, but she wouldn't be in a hospital bed. She would be locked in a cell, where the Colonel wanted her.

Keeping her head down, she walked down a different hallway. How many hallways are there? She had to find the way out soon or she would be in trouble. Even if she found the away out, there was no real way to know if she would be able to walk out the door. As she rounded another corner, big glass doors came into view, but Toni didn't have time to cheer as a blazing alarm sounded.

"Fuck," she muttered as the hallway was shadowed in red lights. "Calm down," she told herself. She fought the urge to run, because they would surely notice her running down the hallway. She was dressed as a nurse, someone who was supposed to be here. If she ran around without a head, they would know she wasn't a nurse and she was the escaped prisoner. "Calm down."

Toni glanced around to see if anyone was looking at her, but no one was paying attention to her. They walked past her without a second glance. Taking this as a sign, she walked to the doors with a look in her eyes that said she knew what she was doing. When she reached the door, she took a deep breath. She was about to open the door, when she heard footsteps behind. She was going to ignore them, but the woman's voice stopped her.

"Turn around."

Toni's eye almost twitched as she was almost home free. She could almost taste it. Balls. She knew it wasn't the end as there was a chance she could talk herself out of this situation. She was a talker, just ask anyone. "Is there a problem?" she asked as she turned around.

There in front of her stood Agent Peggy Carter, a person that Toni recognized right away. Though she had only seen Peggy a couple times after her father's death, she considered her very special to her life. Peggy was an important part to her childhood as she had kept her father in line, when she was round. Peggy, the lovable badass agent, wasn't around as much as Toni would have liked, but she was around enough to make a lasting image. She had that personality that anyone could like.

"Is there something wrong, Agent?" Toni asked as she raised her non-broken arm. Peggy had her pistol trained on her, and that was unsettling. Peggy was one of few people she could speak to growing up. "Is this about the alarm?" She had asked with the sweetest voice she could muster.

Peggy studied her. "Yes. A prisoner has escaped."

"Do you believe I'm that prisoner? That's crazy." The gun was still pointed toward her, but it wasn't going to make Toni sweat. This wasn't the first time she had a gun in her face and she knew it wouldn't be the last.

"Yes," Peggy asked without hesitation. "You're good actress."

Toni had a few options she could do, but she wasn't sure any of them would work. "No, I'm just a nurse," she stated, as she tried to look shaken up.

"Toni, why don't you make this easy?" she asked.

Fuck, Toni thought. She knew she was in trouble, because only Salty knew her name. Peggy must have spoken to him and she must have seen her photo. "I do not do easy."

Peggy looked her over as she took a few steps toward her with the gun still trained on her. "Keep your hands where I can see them."

"Like I can do much with this?" Toni stated as she tried to lift her broken arm. The very movement of her arm hurt. Is that medication wearing off already?

"You did beat up a nurse."

"I just knocked her out." Toni raised her right arm in a sign if surrender. "I didn't beat her up."

"You gave her a black eye."

Toni shrugged. "A black eye never killed anyone." She allowed Peggy to take her away, because she knew it was better than to fight with her. Even on her good day, Toni didn't stand a chance again Peggy, who could kick anyone's but.


	4. Fear of the Hero

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry no Toni in this chapter. I hope you enjoy this, so please let me know what you think!

**Chapter 4:**

**Fear of the Hero**

* * *

 

As soon as Bruce heard about Toni's disappearance, he had cut his trip short and returned to the tower as soon as humanly possible. Toni, one of the few who understood him, was important to him and he would do anything to save her, and he wasn't alone. Anyone of the Avengers would do anything to save her.

Bruce, who looked like he had slept in days, was in Toni's lab, trying to figure out what the hell had happened. With the help of JARVIS, he was able to tell that the device worked in an outward wave, affecting anything within its ten foot range. This had included Toni, and that made his heart stutter. JARVIS had informed him of what could happen to electronics and how they were unsure if the Arc Reactor would withstand the Device. Why couldn't Toni wait for him? The answer was simple: she had a hard head. He admired her for that, but at the same time, it annoyed the hell out of him.

He had studied the hole and watched the security footage. He was shock at first that JARVIS even allowed it as Bruce did not have the authority, but it seemed that the AI cared about Toni's safety, even though JARVIS had no heart. The footage was croppy and kept skipping, which he couldn't understand. JARVIS told him that there wasn't anything wrong with the video.

"How can that be?" Bruce asked. Toni kept jumping to different locations.

"It is the device," JARVIS answered. Each time it went off, Toni's location jumped. "It is not the video, Sir. It is Miss Stark."

Shaking his head, Bruce took a deep look at the video. JARVIS wasn't going to admit that there had been an issue with the footage; Toni must've programed some stubbornness into the AI. Bruce picked up the tablet and watched the footage again. He watched it a few times before he noticed the clock on the desk that Toni kept changing. "Why did she keep changing the clock?" he asked himself. Plus, it also wasn't jumping.

The footage had a time stamp on it, and that time stamp was correct. Bruce had watched it in real time, and he could tell the stamp was correct. So why was Toni messing with clock? He studied each time she changed it. It was always after the wave. What did that mean? Why did she think the time was behind?

He watched the type again, but this time, he watched it at 3 times its normal speed. He was studying's Toni's movement, as the jumpy footage was the key. "Could this even be possible?" he asked himself. It was the only answer possible; the Device was jumping Toni back in time.

"JARVIS, is it possible that the device could've sent Toni back in time?" It could be possible, if the right portal was created, and maybe that device did that.

"That does seem to be the case here."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Natasha wasn't a science genius, but she knew her way around a computer. She had helped Bruce for a few hours before leaving with Clint to see Director Fury, who might be able to locate Toni. Director Fury had an uncanny ability to find anyone though no one had any idea of how that was, but the Avengers weren't going to complain now. They needed to find one of their own.

Up in the penthouse, Steve was sitting at the bar using a tablet, which he still struggled with. Steve didn't really understand modern technology, so he wouldn't be of real any help for Bruce. He didn't even try to help because he knew it would be a waste of time. Unsure of what else he could do, he was looking through the security logs with the help of JARVIS, who was doing most of the work.

"I don't see anything," he said in annoyance.

"There is nothing to see," JARVIS stated. "I have already studied the footage. There is no record of Miss Stark leaving."

"That can be altered," Steve replied.

"Anything can be altered, Captain, but this is not the case here. Only Miss Stark has the authority to alter my records, and she did not do so."

"Would you tell me if she did?" he asked, annoyed. He wasn't sure what he was getting at, because there was no way that Stark could have altered it herself. Even if she did, why would she?

"It would depend on Miss Stark's instructions. I cannot go against her order."

"Understood," Steve stated, putting down the tablet. He stared off, thinking.

"Captain, Mr. Banner is on his way up to speak with you," JARVIS stated after a few seconds of silence. That was one of the few things Steve liked about JARVIS as no one could sneak up on him, though it was hard to sneak up on him these days.

The door to the room opened to reveal a tired Bruce, who had a weird expression on his face. "Banner," Steve greeted. "Find something?"

"I think, but I need a drink first," Bruce said, as he walked to the bar and poured himself a whiskey, but it didn't last. The whiskey burned as he downed it in one slip.

"Are you okay?" Steve asked. He hadn't seen Bruce drink before, because there was always a fear that he could hulk out and hurt someone. "Are you sure you should be drinking?" Though he was a super soldier, there was doubt that he could stop the big guy.

"It's fine. I can handle myself." He picked up the bottle and poured himself another cup. "I think I know where Toni is."

"Where's that?" Steve asked; his heart picked up.

"I'm unsure of the time, but I'm positive that she's in the past." Bruce stared at his glass before taking another slip.

Steve looked at him with an eye brow raised. "Did something hit you in the head?" He paused as he thought about it. "Time travel? Have you fallen asleep reading a science fiction or something?"

Bruce looked long and hard at Steve. "Really? You're a super Soldier, I turn into a big green beast when I'm angry, and we're friends with a demi-god. And you stop at time travel? We aren't strangers to portals. Time travel would work along the same idea." He huffed in annoyance.

"I guess," he stated.

"I'm starting to believe Clint."

Steve narrowed his eyes. "Believe Barton? With what?" he asked, annoyed.

"Don't worry about," Bruce waved off. He didn't need a pissed off Captain America, because they had other things to worry about. "I'm not an expert in portals. I think we'll need help with this one."

"What time do you think Stark is in?" he asked. Worry was present in his tone as he said her name.

"I don't know, and that may be the problem." Bruce shook his head. There was no real way for them to know what time she was transported back to, and he knew that would be a major issue. How could they save her if they had no idea of where to save her from?

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Director Fury was pissed. He was always pissed, but at this point, he was royally pissed, and everyone knew it. Anyone who had any common sense stayed as far away from him as possible, and that was hard since they were in a base flying in the air. One of his SHIELD bases had been broken into and they had no idea who or how. The security system had to have been hacked, because there was no record of any unauthorized entry, and there had been one. None of his techs had been able to figure out how, and that really pissed him off. No one stole from him and got away with it.

He was going to ask the egoist Stark, the last resort, for help only to find that she had disappeared without a trace, and that didn't sit well with him. Sure, he knew she was working on something and the Avengers blamed her disappearance on that Device, but he wasn't so sure. It couldn't have been a coincidence that she disappeared on the same day that one of the SHIELD's bases was broken into. He would get to the bottom of this.

But first, he had to speak with Agent Romanoff and Agent Barton again. He had already spoken to them about the strange disappearance of Toni Stark, but they hadn't heard about break in yet. He wanted their opinion on the matter, because he valued their opinion more than he let on.

Director Fury walked into a small conference room, where Natasha and Clint were waiting. "Have you found anything out about Stark yet?" he asked the two highly trained assassins.

"No, but Banner's looking for answers in Stark's lab," Natasha answered from the corner of the room.

"Do you think this could've been an outside attack?" Fury asked, waiting for the right moment to mention the security breach.

Clint narrowed his eyes. "I believe you do?" he asked, seated. "Did something happen?"

"Somehow, someone had broken into the base at Black Hawk," Fury stated. "There is no footage or record of the unauthorized entry, but a few of the top secret items had been taken."

"And you think this has something to do with Toni's disappearance?" Clint asked.

"I do. With the items taken, it would've been possible for them to affect Stark's Device." Fury with his one eye was able to look at both Romanoff and Barton. If they were surprised or taken back, they didn't show it.

"Stark had showed me the specs for her lab once, and from what I could tell, she made that lab into a fortress. Nothing would affect it," Natasha stated. "Unless you found a way."

Fury took a deep breath. "We need-"

"Is this about how you think the Avengers are a National Security risk and you need a way to take each one of us down if needed?" Clint injected, bitterly with his armed folded across his chest.

Natasha took a glance at Clint, knowing he was insulted by that, but she understood where Fury was coming from. If anyone one of them decided to turn, there would be no one to stop them.

"Yes, and the items taken were specifically designed to take down Toni Stark and the Iron Man Suit," he stated with no shame. "And this is why I think these two things are related."

Clint was having a difficult time believing what he was hearing. "Really?" he asked, shaking his head. "Okay, let's look pass the weapons that you can use against the Avengers and look at the Device that Toni, herself, had made. It was that device that made Toni disappeared. What makes you think that the items stolen did anything to her?" Clint was pissed and it was clear with each word he spoke.

"We knew about the Device that she was working on and it was clear that the person who stole the weapons," he said slowly, unsure if he should use that word, "knew as well. Her unnamed Device worked through a wave, and we had a device that could have interrupted that." He wasn't going to go into detail about the device.

"Do you think it was an inside job?" Natasha asked. She didn't look pissed, which annoyed Clint.

"I don't know, but I can't be for sure. We have to keep it a possibility," Fury stated. "I had sent a message to Asgard for Thor, which wasn't something I wanted to do, but we'll need his help for this. He should be able to help locate Stark and the missing weapons." He turned to the door and Agent Romanoff didn't stop him as he left.

Clint looked between the two. "Are we really not going to talk about the weapons you created to takedown the Avengers?"

"Barton, let it go," Natasha stated. "We have other things to worry about."

Clint looked between the two. "For now."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Steve was now located with Bruce down in the lab, where he was pretty much useless, but he had to do something as he would go crazy if he didn't. He was Captain America and he refused to stand on the sideline and do nothing. However, at this moment in time, he was pacing…which was doing nothing besides burning a hole in the floor.

"Steve, calm down," Bruce stated, eyeing him from a workbench. "And stop eyeing the hole. It isn't doing any good."

"I can't help it. I have a teammate missing and there isn't anything I can do." He stopped and looked to Bruce, who was building something. "Have you heard from Barton and Romanoff yet?"

"JARVIS said they are on their way back and Barton isn't happy about something."

"He isn't happy about a lot of things," Steve muttered, sighing. They hadn't talked much since the night Toni had disappeared, and it wasn't because they were worried about the lost genius. Hawkeye and Captain America worked well together in the field, but off the field, their two different attitudes didn't match well together.

Bruce rotated in the chair. "Neither are you. Do you want to talk about it?"

Steve turned to him and replied a little too fast, "I'm happy, well happy as I can be with Stark missing."

"You can talk about it. There's nothing wrong with talking," Bruce stated.

"And we don't have time for this."

Taking a deep breath, Bruce spoke, "We do. There's nothing else I can do without Barton and Romanoff. They're being back supplies from SHIELD."

Steve took a seat at the hole's edge and hanged his feet over. "I'm just worry about Toni," he said after a few seconds of silence. He was staring at his hands, unsure of what to do with them.

"We're all worry about her."

"I feel like it's my fault."

Bruce stared at him for a few seconds before standing up and walking over to him. "How is this your fault? You didn't lock her in the lab and force her to work on that Device. You have no idea of what could've happen."

"But it is. If I didn't get into a fight with her and force her back in here, she wouldn't have been working on it," he paused, "She wouldn't be in danger if I just left her alone. Her chest piece could be not functioning right now, and it is my fault because I pushed her. I pushed the woman that I-" He stopped himself. He wasn't going to say it.

Bruce didn't push. "Toni is hard headed and this would've happened with or without you. She had been pushing herself to the breaking point before she met us and she'll be doing it after we leave."

Steve looked at from the corner of his eye. "Are you thinking of leaving?"

Startled at Steve's question, he didn't answer right away. "I'm not thinking of leaving. Toni is one of the few people, who I can be myself around, and I wouldn't give up that friendship."

"Then why did you state 'she will be doing it after we leave?'" Steve asked, studying Banner's face.

"You never know what will happen in the future," he stated, defending himself.

Steve took a deep breath. "I understand. Let's find a way so we can get her back."

Bruce looked back to his work desk, knowing he would do anything possible to get Toni back. "JARVIS, are Barton and Romanoff back yet?" he asked.

"Yes, Mr. Banner. They have just arrived on the helipad with the equipment you require."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Clint was still annoyed and it showed to everyone round. He so annoyed that he was willing to pick a fight with Captain Rogers just so he could have something to do, something else to think about.

"Barton, you need to calm down," Natasha stated as they walked down to the labs. They both had suitcases in their hands, and each held heavy important equipment.

"How dare SHIELD think we are dangerous when they have weapons that can take each of us out?" he asked angrily. He picked up his speed in order to get the lab faster.

"It's understandable. Think about it."

Clint turned quickly and glared at her. "I have already, and I think Director Fury is an idiot. And don't try to make me see reason, because of right now, one of our teammate is in danger because of him. If anyone happens to Toni because of Fury, I will never return to SHIELD," he snapped, turning away. "And then he can really count me of an enemy, as I will be coming for him." He tightened his grip on the metal suitcase.

Natasha walked behind him in silence, because there was no talking him down. He had to cool down on his own, and besides, she knew how he felt. Though Stark was a pain in ass, she cared about the genius and she would do anything to save her.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

When they arrived at the lab, Banner with eyes on the lab's door was sitting in a chair waiting for them and Rogers with a hard expression was still sitting on the edge of the hole. "About time," Banner stated as the assassins entered the room. "I was starting to worry about you guys."

"Director Fury wanted to speak with us about a theory." Natasha said as she handed the suitcases to Banner, who took them both and placed them on the desk.

Bruce looked back and noticed the anger on Clint's face. "What's up with you?" he asked. "If you were the hulk, we would be in trouble." He kept back his laughter, but there was still a smile on his face.

Clint turned to him and explained the conversion that Natasha and he had with Fury. "I told Natasha this, but I will tell you this: 'If anyone happens to Toni because of him, I will never return to SHIELD.' They can consider me their enemy. I'm dead serious."

Steve looked up and eyed the archer. "I do remember him stating before that we were a security risk," he stated. His arms were folded across his chest as he recalled that conversion.

Bruce, who was taking deep breaths, sighed. "I still don't see how Captain America is a national security risk," he said in annoyance. "And I would agree with Clint. I might have to reintroduce SHIELD to the big guy." He wasn't joking, and this tone told everyone this.

Natasha looked annoyed, but she didn't say anything. She wanted to be piss at SHIELD, but she knew where they were coming from. Banner for example couldn't always control the Hulk and he could destroy a whole city, so SHIELD would need a way to stop him. Clint had turned on them already (sure not of his own will), but he had cause a great amount of destruction. With the Iron Man suit, it was possible for someone or something to steal it or recreate a suit like it, which had happened before. They needed something to stop a suit like that. However, that didn't mean she wouldn't let SHIELD have it if something did happen to Toni.

Steve ran his hand through his hair. "Let's get to work, and worry about SHIELD later. We need to find Toni." He crossed to the case and opened one of the case. He stared at the equipment, unsure of what any of the items were or how they worked.

Clint took a big breath. "Anyhow, Director Asshat sent a message to Thor."

"That might be helpful," Bruce stated.

"Why do you think that?" Natasha asked.

"I believe Toni's in the past and Thor has some sort of idea of portals," Bruce answered, as he walked back to the workbench. Running his hand through his hair, he took a deep breath. "That's how he travels home, and I believe time travel works in the same."

"Wait what?" Clint asked, shocked.

"What are you talking about?" Natasha asked, her eyes narrowing.

Bruce looked back and smiled lightly. "I believe that Toni transported herself into the past, though I'm not sure to which time period."


	5. The Silence of Time

**Chapter 5:**

**The Silence of Time**

* * *

 

There was a chill in the room and the thin fugly sweater Toni was wearing wasn't keeping her warm. Her hair was standing up on her arms and she had the goose bumps up and down her body. She had tried to adjust the sweater, but she couldn't with a broken arm and the other handcuffed to table. She couldn't move her chair either as it was bolted to the ground, which annoyed her, but it didn't annoy her as much as them, the Colonel and company, their stupid tactics Sure, she was their prisoner, but they couldn't- wouldn't get under her skin. She was tougher than some cold room.

Toni glanced around the room, looking for something that could help her, but she knew there wouldn't be anything. They had underestimated her the first time and she knew they weren't taking any chances now. They had locked her into a 10 by 8 ft. room and made sure that there was nothing in her arm's reach or even in the room that she could use. Across from her was a police style window, where she couldn't see through but they could see her. That pissed her off. She had been sitting in this freezing room with dim lights for hours, or what seemed like days, as they watched her. She knew they were waiting to see if they could break her, which was impossible. She wouldn't say anything.

The chair was the most uncomfortable chair on the planet and no matter which way she moved, Toni could not find a comfortable position. I wish I could put my feet up, she thought as she couldn't t kick her feet up like she wanted. The pain, which was controlled by medication, was still present, and it was still bothersome, making it hard to think. She needed to have a clear mind if she wanted to beat those asshats. Toni glanced around the room, trying to clear to her mind from the pain.

There was no window besides the police style window, which made it hard to tell how much time had passed. There was a chair in the corner of the room, and it didn't appear to be bolted like hers, which wasn't fair. Why does the interviewer get the free chair? "Hello," she yelled, getting annoyed at the silence. She had enough of it; she wanted to talk to someone and make them cry, which was her specialty. She was known for getting under people's skin; just ask her team. She had gotten into fights with the other Avengers over her mouth. "Did you forget about me?"

There was no answer, and it pissed her off even more. She hated sitting in dead silence not doing anything, because there was so much she could be doing. She had to work on her device or she would never get home, though there was no real chance she could get home. She had no idea of how she got to the past, but she needed to figure it out so she could get home before anyone realized who she was. It would be bad if they did. She would hate to see what her father would do if he learned the truth.

Toni glared at the window as if she could burn a hole into it. "Asshats!" she muttered. There was still no movement for a few more additional hours, and it started to get to her, which annoyed her. They would not take her at her best, and they had to weaken her before they went at her. How manly was that?

Leaning back the best she could, Toni wiggled in her chair. Maybe, she could sing something, because that would surely send them running. Her singing sucked ass so bad that it could shatter glass, though she would defend it if someone else tried to insult it. "I'm on the highway to hell-" she started but she cut herself off after a few seconds. She couldn't sing that song or any song as they didn't exist yet and she couldn't sing a song that didn't exist yet. Closing her eyes and shaking her head, she went through her memory banks. She couldn't think of any song from the 1940's and that annoyed her. How can Toni annoy them if she couldn't sing a song?

She guessed she could always make up a song, which could be worse. "Bored, Bored, Bored. What's a girl to do when she is cold and bored!" she sung at the top of her lungs. It sounded like nails on a chalkboard. "They leave me alone for what seems like days, and I think I could freeze to death, but boredom would be my death!" She could feel her throat start to dry, but she knew if they were listening, they would be in soon. They wouldn't be able to take much more of her horrible singing. "Silence of Death is almost upon us!" she let it go. "Bored leads-"

The door to the room started to open, silencing the loud genius. Mr. Salty walked in with an expression that someone just farted in his face, which made Toni chuckle. "Sound something smelly?" she asked with an annoying smile on her face. "Or that could be just your normal face!"

Colonel Phillips narrowed his eyes at Toni as he picked up the chair in the corner and placed it in front of the table across from her. "It could just be your horrible singing."

Again, she knew her singing sucked, but no one else was allowed to say. "I tried," Toni teased, as she studied him. Though she was unsure of the time-lapse since she last saw Salty, he looked older. "Did something happen, Salty?"

He looked at her. "My mother had always taught me to be respectful to ladies, and you make that difficult." He placed the thick folder he was carrying on the table. "Did your mother ever teach you manners?"

Toni's expression turned hard, as she heard him ask that. Though it wasn't a serious question or even a question about her identity, it cut her to the core. Her relationship with her mother was cut short by Maria's death, and it still hurt, knowing she wasn't able to learn from her. There were points where Toni wondered what her life would have been like if she had a mother and wasn't alone with her father. "My mother died when I was young."

The look on the Colonel's face changed a little. "I'm sorry."

Toni tried to wave it off, but she was only able to move her hand a few inches off the table. "I'm not going to tell you anything, because I didn't do anything," she stated, changing the subject. She didn't want his pity and if she could move, she would throw something at him.

"You did attack a nurse and stole her clothes," he responded, eyeing her clothes.

She almost forgot that she was wearing the ugly nurse's outfit. "I'm being held prisoner without just cause," she stated, glancing toward the window. She wondered who was behind it, but she was sure it was her annoying father and Dr. Erskine.

"I wouldn't say it was without cause," he stated as he opened the folder and revealed photos of her device, which was taken apart. There were wires connected to the device, trying to power it up.

"I've done nothing wrong, so give me back my items and let me go," she demanded. She tried to cross her arms but couldn't thanks to the handcuff. "I've a right to design and invent advance technology." She forced her thoughts away from the Arc Reactor that Phillips was staring at. "They're my property."

"Ever heard of Eminent domain?" he asked.

Toni narrowed her eyes. "Yes, as only a complete idiot wouldn't know what it is. It's the power to take private property for public use by the government following the payment of just compensation to the owner of that property," she stated, annoyed. "However, I did not get paid nor are you using my device, which you had no idea what it is, for public use. Besides it's not the same kind of property; it's not land. Eminent Domain applies to land." She so needed to get out of here with her device, but she needed to find an escape, which would be hard. Maybe when they moved her again, she would be able to escape from that cell.

"Your device could help the public."

"You just want to use it for your military, which I will not condone. I do not create weapons," Toni stated. She was retired from the weapons business and she refused to return, even if the unnamed device could be used as a weapon (if it worked like it was supposed to) and she upgraded/designed better weapons for the Avengers. She would not create massive weapons anymore; Stark Industries was no longer making weapons. Howard Stark be damned.

"That's strange for a Spy to say."

Toni was sick and tired of being called a Spy; that was Romanoff and Barton's job. "How many times do I need to say it? I am not a spy," she snapped. She took a deep breath as she told herself to calm down. Her anger would get her nowhere. "Just let me go."

Salty looked at her. "Let's talk about this device and that thing in your chest. No one can figure out anything about them, not even Mr. Stark and he's our head weapons expert." The colonel spread the photos apart.

"As they are not a weapon, it would make sense a weapons expert would not know anything about them," Toni stated, narrowing her eyes at him.

The Colonel stared at the Arc reactor, which didn't sit well with Toni. "It would be wise to cooperate with us. I do not wish to hurt a woman." He picked up a photo and stared at it. "I just need to know how this works and what exactly it does. When we found you, it appears as if the device exploded, which we all it didn't. You would be dead if it did."

Toni didn't remember much about the device's explosion or what happened in the field. Her memories were shakily at best and she really had no idea of the power behind the device. If she had to judge by her broken arm and swore body, it wasn't fun. "Afraid to hurt a woman?" she asked annoyed.

"Afraid No. I simply do not wish to. I don't believe like most that women belong only in the kitchen, and I do not agree with that simply because Agent Carter would shoot me," he stated. "But I do believe there are certain things that should never be done to a lady. They deserve respect."

It had always annoyed her that she was treated differently than men. "Let me tell you, I hate when people treat me with kid gloves. I'm just as good as any guy." She fought the urge to hit him, which she couldn't do any ways.

Phillips put down the photo. "I have no doubt you could talk circles around most man and could outsmart almost anyone, but there are few areas that you cannot beat a man in." He leaned back and studied her.

Toni was petite, barely weighting 100 pounds, and was only about 5 foot 2 inches. In a physical fight with a man who was twice her size, she would most likely lose; however, her brain could even the playing field. "Don't count me out just yet," Toni replied. Careful, Toni, she warned herself. You don't have the Iron Man Suit. "I can take care of myself."

He took a deep breath. "As you are here, I believe you have failed. Please, just cooperate. It would make things simpler." Colonel Salt stood up and stepped to the glass window. He stared through it as if he could see the person on the other side. "If you aren't a spy, what are you trying to hide?"

"I'm an inventor, just like your weapons expert. Would you ask him to tell you all of his secrets?" Toni asked. The questions that he was asking, Toni couldn't answer anyways. She knew what the device was supposed to do, but she had no idea of what it really did. It took her back in time, but she had no idea of how. What else did it do? Could it send her back to the future? She wouldn't know until she got it back. "If you did, I bet he wouldn't say anything as well." She knew her father well, and he would go to his grave before he revealed his secrets.

The Colonel laughed. "You're correct."

"Will you still ask me to reveal my inventions, Salty?" she asked, eyeing the man. He had turned back to her.

Phillips cut back to the table in a sharp turn. "My name in Colonel Phillips. Please refrain from calling me Salty." He took a deep breath to calm himself. "I trust Stark for the most part. I do not trust someone with no record. I cannot locate any record of you existing."

Toni fought back her chuckle at finally annoying him, knowing it would be a bad idea. "Technology is not as good as it should be. Is it really hard to believe that you cannot find record of me?"

"No, but that's a warning sign." He walked to the door, leaving the photos on the tables. "We'll talk later," he said with a smile as he walked out of the room.

"See ya, Salty!" Toni yelled.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

The colonel had left a few hours ago and Toni hadn't seen anyone since, which pissed her off even more. Her back was starting hurt from the hard metal death trap, and she needed more pain medication. The pain had come back full force, and she was ready to snap. Plus, it was freezing in this room.

Her mind drifted to the conversion she had with the colonel and it had her worried. What would he really do to her? Would he really torture her? There weren't a lot of things that scared her, but the idea of being tortured scared her. She had suffered from water boarding and other torture techniques before, and she didn't want to go back there, because she wasn't sure she could come back from that again. Just thinking about it got her heart racing. "Calm down," she whispered to herself. If she let him get to her, it wouldn't help and they would win, which she couldn't allow. She couldn't let them get to her, because if they got power over her, it wouldn't be good. The more power they got over her the more they could break her. She needed to put distance between them so she could protect her secrets.

Toni thought she handled the Colonel well, and she knew she had annoyed him, which she smiled about. She didn't know if he would come back or if he would send someone else in. If Howard walked through the door and she had to speak to him, she didn't know if she could handle it without turning to violence. She didn't know if she would be angry or spineless, which was normal for her. He had a presence that could tear anyone one down. He wasn't always like that, she thought. It was a long time ago and it was hard to remember, but he was a nice loving father. She blamed the change on Maria's death.

She knew some of it had to do with Rogers as well. It was selfish to blame Rogers for it, but she did. He was part of the reason, because Howard couldn't get over his disappearance. If she had to judge by the endless rambling of her father, they had been close, which she was semi jealous of…Okay she was completely jealous of Rogers, because he had a relationship with her father that she wished she had. He had seen a side of her father that she never saw. She wished she had a close friendship with someone, which she didn't have. Sure, she was close to Pepper and Rhodey, but there were parts of her that she hadn't and wouldn't share with them. She was too ashamed to let them.

After Roger had disappeared, Howard had put everything into finding the Captain and he kept looking when everyone else, even Peggy, had given up. Searching for countless years had drained him of everything and he didn't have anything else to give to Maria or her later on. Toni knew he loved them both, but he didn't show it. He was too busy.

When Maria had dead, Toni could see the sudden change, and it hit her hard. Before her mother died, Howard, though distance, had let her in the lab at least, but after, he wouldn't let her in at all. He became a total asshole, or rather a bigger asshole than before. It almost broke her before she realized that she didn't need him or his love. She could and would make it on her own, because she was strong and she wasn't the weak girl her father thought she was. She was going to show everyone that she was someone. She wouldn't let anyone think she was worthless. She was Toni Stark.

Toni leaned back and stared at her broken arm. Why did she care what others thought of her? It didn't change who she was or what she was able to do. She was still Toni Stark, one of the greatest minds on the planet and she would be damn if she let others define her….But you do! She argued with herself. There were a select few people could make herself feel like an idiot.

The door to the room opened again revealing the Famous Dr. Erskine, who wearing a white lab coat and glasses. In his hand, he had a clipboard with a collection of papers on it. She couldn't read anything from her location, but she knew it had to be about her. Who else could it be on? "Hello, Doctor," Toni smiled as he sat down across from her. He looked just like she remembered from the photos she had seen in her father's office.

Dr. Erskine sat the clip board down on the table and shifted through the papers. "How are you feeling? Any pain?" he asked as he reached in his pocket. "Should be time for another dose."

There was no doubt the pain medication had worn off as Toni was in some serious pain, but she got to thinking. Would it be a good idea to take meds from these people, who thought she was a spy? They could make her loopy and there was no telling what they could get out of her if that happened. "No, I'm good," she stated, eyeing him. "I won't tell you anything."

He looked at her. "You speak as if there's something to tell."

He had an accent, which Toni of course knew of, but it caught her off guard. It made her feel like she could trust him…What was it about accents that drew people in? "I don't have anything to tell."

"Then what's with the nerves?" he asked as he sit the pill bottle on the table. "I'm not here to interrogate you. I'm simply here to check up on you." He smiled as he opened the bottle and slid it to Toni. "It'll not hurt you."

Toni wasn't sure of that. "I'm fine. You can leave." She rested her broken arm on her lap while her right arm rested uncomfortably on the table as she was unable to move it.

Without a word, Dr. Erskine stood up and turned to the door.

"Wait, you're really leaving?" Toni asked surprised. She wasn't expecting him to leave so easy, and she kind of didn't want him to leave. She had been sitting in a room alone enough and she wanted something to do even if it was just staring at someone.

"I respect a lady's wishes," he stated as he turned back to her. He held the clip behind his back. "You did ask me to leave. I will not impose myself on you."

Toni took a deep breath, knowing she should let him leave. The Colonel, who knew what he was doing, probably sent him in to get her to speak, because Erskine had a friendly face. Though it wasn't often, the Captain in her time had only good thing to say about the Doctor. "Then you should let me go?" she asked.

The good Doctor walked back to the table, taking a deep breath. "You have to understand the situation that you're in." He retook the seat. "You were found trespassing in an empty lot, which looked like a bomb went off."

Toni narrowed her eyes. "If was a bomb, I wouldn't just have got a broken arm." Though her memory of that night was hazy, she wouldn't describe it as an explosion. There wasn't a hole in the ground. There wasn't anything in pieces besides the pieces from her time. Everything just looked like it fell from a great height. Either way, how was she even alive? "And it wasn't like I did it on purpose," she stated. She didn't even know how she did it.

"There's also the fact that you were found with two unknown devices," Dr. Erskine stated. "Very interesting devices I must say." He was staring at the glow under her shirt, which Toni noticed. "It's fascinating that you would intergrade the device into your chest."

"It wasn't a choice," Toni muttered. Though she was thankful to the device which saved her life, the device had caused her so much pain. It had almost killed her. He stared into her eyes and she knew he could see the pain in her eyes. "Without it, I will die," she muttered again.

Erskine looked at her. "What does it do?" he asked.

"It protects my heart," she answered, slowly. It was silent for a few minutes as no one spoke. Toni didn't want to say anything and Erskine was giving her time to think in case she did.

"It's cold in here, isn't it?" he asked, looking down to the opened pill bottle that hadn't been touched by Toni. "You should take one. I can see you are in pain."

He was correct; she was in pain, but she wasn't going to take them. She had experience worse pain before and this time was nothing like that. She had experience waterboarding, which was something she didn't want to relive. However, her mind liked to drift to that feeling of drowning, to that feeling of no control. She shook her head. This pain was just annoying and she could deal with. "I'm good," she grumbled.

He looked at her. "You've faced a lot in your life, haven't you?"

Toni could feel her eye twitch as he saw right through her. "I have, but that doesn't matter here." She looked pass Erskine's head and at the glass, wondering who was watching now.

"So are you going to tell me how it protects your heart?"

Something in her mind snapped as Toni realized who she was talking to. He wasn't her friend; he was friends with Colonel Salty, who wanted her secrets. "Nice try, but I won't tell you anything," she responded, knowing it was already too late. She stated too much.

"I wasn't trying to get anything out of you, Toni. I was making sure you're okay."

Toni narrowed her eyes. She hated when people checked up on her, and it just made her want to punch something. "I'm fine. You can go tell Colonel Salty that."

Erskine picked up the pill bottle and put the cap back on. "Against popular belief, I do not hold the same ideals of Colonel Phillips." He stood up and picked up the clip board. "I don't believe you're a spy." He walked toward the door and stared back at her before leaving.

Again, she was alone and this time she wondered how long it would be this time. She didn't know how much longer she would last in this painful cold room.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

For the last three hours, Toni had been pulling at the handcuffs to the point that her wrist was bleeding, but she didn't stop. She kept pulling, knowing this was her chance to escape. If they had been watching her, they would've come running. You know you're being stupid, right? She told herself. Even if she was able to escape the room, there was no way she could make it out without anyone noticing. She was being held by the military not by some Joe. Sure they weren't as advanced as they were in her time, but they still weren't a force to be messed with. However, Toni loved to take stupid risks, and she didn't care if it got her in trouble. She didn't care if it put her in hot water with her team or not. She didn't care if she got yelled at by Rogers. It just meant she did her job.

Maybe, I can slip my hand out of if I dislocate my thump, she thought, but she disregarded that thought. If she did that, she would have two worthless hands, and she needed at least one working hand. Maybe, I should just stay still and wait to see what will happen. She knew if she tried to escape it would make her look guilty, and that wouldn't help her. If she wanted to get out of here and back to her device, she would need them to let her go.

Toni laid her forehead on the cold table and closed her eyes. It was stupid to fall asleep in a cold room, but it was easier to think. As soon as she got out of here, she would hack into Stark and the military computers to look for her device, which shouldn't be an issue for her. Granted, she didn't know what kind of computers they had back in these days, but she was a genius. She could hack into anything.

It was freaken freezing in the room, which made Toni want to beat someone. Did they really think they could get her to talk when she was frozen to the death? She didn't think so. They could just send the Doctor in, who seemed to be able to get through her defenses. I wonder who they would send in next. If they sent in her father, it wouldn't be pretty. She would find some way to hit him with a chair or something. She knew she couldn't kill or maim him, because that would miss up the timeline and stuff, and she would like to be born.

"Are you awake?"

Toni jumped, not hearing that someone had entered the room. She looked up to see Agent Carter walk toward the table and sat something down. She didn't say anything as she reached over Toni and unlocked the handcuffs. "Do you want medical attention for that?" Peggy asked as handcuff fell from Toni's bleedy wrist.

"No, I'm good." Toni eyed Peggy as she stepped away. "What's going on? Where are we going?" she asked.

Peggy slid a bag toward Toni. "You are free to go. Here're your things."

"What?" Toni asked shocked. She reached for the bag to find her muddy and holy clothes that she had been wearing when she first arrived. Her cell phone, to her surprise, was also in the bag. I wasn't expecting to see this again, she thought. Her unnamed device was not in the bag, which pissed her off. "Why are you letting me go? And where is my device?"

Turning her back on Toni, Peggy walked to the door. "Come with me. I will show you out."

"Where's my device?" Toni snapped, shooting to her feet. It felt good to stand after being force to sit for countless hours, and she had no desire to sit again for a while.

"Stark has it, and you're not getting it back."

"Why is that?" she hissed as she gripped her smart phone in her hand. They had given her everything back except the thing she wanted and needed. "Why give me back everything else but that?"

Peggy turned back to her. "We have deemed the two items safe. We cannot do that with the other device."

Idiots, she thought. They were wasting their time on a device that only she could fix, and it almost made her laugh, because right now, her Arc Reactor posed more danger to them than a broken device, which they couldn't even began to power. "You deemed an unknown communication device that I could be using to transmit secrets safe, but yet, a broken device, which Stark can't even turn on, unsafe. Wow, you guys are stupid," Toni stated, picking up the bag and walking out the door. She didn't even wait for Peggy, when she had other things to do. She would get her device back because Howard Stark had nothing on her hacking skills.

"You should watch what you say," Agent Carter warned as she walked out of the room. "And the exit is this way." She turned to the left and waved Toni to follow her.

"You just ruined my 'walk away,'" she whined. Peggy was correct: Toni needed to be careful with what she said as she was being watched. She could land herself in trouble, which she had to avoid; however, she sucked at that. She couldn't keep her mouth shut to save her life. "Why are you letting me go?" she asked, curiously. "Did Colonel Salty change his mind? He thought I was a spy, a danger."

Peggy glanced back at the use of the word Salty. "He still does, but Dr. Erskine doesn't think so. He believes you are no threat."

Toni wondered for a second if they would've yet her go if she was male, but that didn't matter. She didn't have time to think about shit like that, when she had to get home. "What do you think?" she asked.

"It's not my place. I'm following orders," she said.

That was why Toni could never join the military or any government agency; she couldn't blindly follow orders or remain silent when she had something to say. It was a wonder that she worked so well with the Avengers…well it depended on who was asked. Captain America might disagree with that, as they were always fighting over something.

"Here, we go," Peggy stated as they walked out onto the streets.

"Where are we?" Tony asked as she didn't recognize anything.

Peggy looked at her as if she was crazy. "Do you not recognize the streets of New York?"

That took Toni's breath away because there were no bright colors or no flashes ads like in her time. She felt so out of place in this city, because it looked nothing like her New York. Was this how Rogers felt when he realized that he wasn't in his New York and he was asleep for 70 years? Did he feel alone and that he didn't belong? Was he still feeling that? Toni never really thought about what he was feeling or how it was like to lose everything that she ever cared about. She knew Peggy was still alive in her time, but he wasn't going to contact her. He was too much of a gentleman and he was going to allow her to die in peace.

"I-" Toni started as she turned around. Peggy was gone and the doors were seal shut, leaving Toni all alone in the old fashioned New York. She wasn't scared, but this was a whole different world than what she was used to.

With the bag in her hand, Toni, still in the fugly nurse Uniform, walked down the streets heading toward the location of Stark Industries. She did her best to ignore the cold that was nipping at her and the fact that after she stole her device back there was nowhere she could go. She had no money or resources; what was she supposed to do? Toni wasn't sure, but she knew what the first thing she had to do: she had to get the device. After that, she wasn't sure.


	6. Prediction

**Chapter 6:**

**Prediction**

* * *

 

Colonel Phillips didn't know what he thought about the woman with no last name, but he knew he didn't trust the shit she was spouting. There was something odd about that woman and he was going to find out what it was. He didn't know what he was going to do just yet as he didn't want to hurt her. It went against his core to interrogate a lady with force, and no matter how much Toni pissed him off, he wasn't going to.

He watched from behind the glass as the Doctor spoke with her. Erskine had a way about that him that could get anyone to trust him, even without the accent. He wasn't skillful in interrogations as he had a bleeding heart, which wasn't a good thing; however, it seemed to be working. Toni was speaking with him, which was something Phillips wasn't able to get her to do. She was letting her shield down with him.

"It will not hurt you," Erskine stated.

Phillips eyed the pill bottle that Toni had refused to touch. That told him a lot about the woman, who no one knew anything about. It showed that she didn't trust people, granted he understood her situation. He wouldn't trust anyone either if he was handcuffed to a table in a locked room, but there was something else there. He could see that in her eyes. He doubted she truly trusted anyone in her life, which stroked him as odd as even a spy needed trust. She must have seen or been through something in her life.

He was beginning to wonder if she really was a spy, but even if she wasn't, she was something. A normal citizen did not have unknown devices on him or her that could keep the U.S. Military guessing, and the colonel did not care for that.

The Colonel kept his eyes on Toni as she spoke, "I'm fine. You can leave." He could see her shift in pain and it pulled at his heart strings as he disliked seeing a lady in pain, but there was nothing he could do.

He turned his attention back to Dr. Erskine, who had a calculating side to him and he knew when to push and when not to push.

"Wait, you're really leaving?" Toni asked as he crossed to the door.

"I respect a lady's wishes," the doctor stated as he turned back to her. "You did ask me to leave. I will not impose myself on you."

Phillips kept back his snort in annoyance as Erskine was able to get her. "Figures," he muttered to himself. "Though, it seems like the silence is getting to her." He knew she would because the silence was maddening.

"Then you should let me go?" she asked.

"You have to understand the situation that you're in." He retook the seat. "You were found trespassing in an empty lot, which looked like a bomb went off."

Phillips watched Toni's expression to see if he could read her. It appeared she was a master in hiding her emotions, but she had a few tells. He could see the worry and fear in her eyes.

"If was a bomb, I wouldn't just have got a broken arm. And it wasn't like I did it on purpose," Toni stated.

"There's also the fact that you were found with two unknown devices. Very interesting devices I must say," Erskine stated. "It's fascinating that you would intergrade the device into your chest."

The Colonel, as well, was interested in that, because he couldn't think of anything reason why someone would want a glowing object in his or her chest. What could that device possible do that would make it worth putting it in her body? As it was placed near her heart, it had to have been dangerous to intergrade it into her body. He guessed it had to do what that reactor did.

"It wasn't a choice," Toni muttered. "Without it, I will die."

Phillips knew, due to her freak out earlier, that taking it out would kill her, but her statement got him wondering. Did something force that device on her? Or did something happen to her that forced her to take it? He guessed it would have to do with what it did. Did it keep her heart beating like pacemaker did? If it did, why would a young thing like her need one of those? However, it might not have anything to do with her heart. Maybe it had to do with her blood. She might've been poisoned and that device could be keeping her blood clean. Or maybe, it kept her safe from someone. He didn't know what it did but he was going to find out.

It would be dangerous to let her go without knowing all of her secrets. The idea that she was a spy was less plausible now, but Toni could still be dangerous to the public. She could still be a terrorist or criminal, which was almost as bad.

Erskine looked at her. "What does it do?" he asked.

"It protects my heart," she answered, slowly.

Protects your heart? The Colonel thought about that for a while as it had answered one of his questions. If it was protecting her heart, her heart mustn't be the problem. There had to be something inside her that was attacking her body.

"It's cold in here, isn't it?" Erskine asked, after a few minutes of silence. "You should take one. I can see you're in pain." He offered her the pills again.

There was no way Toni would touch those pills and the Colonel knew this. If she had been poisoned and that device was blocking the poison from entering her heart, he knew she would not touch it. Was that why she didn't trust anyone? He asked himself. It didn't matter the reason why, because she wouldn't take anything from anyone.

"I'm good," she grumbled.

Phillips took a deep breath and crossed to the corner table. He wouldn't admit it, but Toni's pain was getting to him. He disliked seeing anyone in pain, but there wasn't anything he could do for her. She was the reason why she was in pain, and he couldn't do anything for her until she admitted the truth. "Just tell us everything and this all can be over," he stated, knowing no one could hear it.

"You've faced a lot in your life, haven't you?" Erskine stated, seeing through her worry like Phillips had done.

"I have, but that doesn't matter here."

That statement stroke Phillips, because she sounded broken. What had she gone through to make her like this? He wasn't sure.

"So are you going to tell me how it protects your heart?"

"Nice try, but I won't tell you anything," she snapped. Phillips had noticed the change in Toni as Erskine spoke to her. The time in that room was getting to her; silence could be one of the most dangerous tools in an interrogation.

"I wasn't trying to get anything out of you, Toni. I was making sure you're okay."

"I'm fine. You can go tell Colonel Salty that."

He had no idea why she kept calling him Salty but it was pissing him off. That wasn't his name and she should respect him enough to call him by his name, considering it was up to him if she would be freed. "She has a mouth on her," he stated, annoyed.

"She seemed to be an impressive woman," Agent Carter stated as she entered the room.

"I wouldn't say impressive. Maybe, you should check your dictionary," the Colonel replied as she turned to her. "She's a criminal."

"We don't know that yet," Peggy responded, eyeing Toni. "And you don't think she's a spy now?" She leaned against the glass, watching Erskine leave.

Phillips turned his attention back to Toni, who had started to pick at her cast. He could see in the muscles in her mind work as she stared blankly at the one-way mirror. "Where did the Doctor go?"

Peggy crossed to the door and looked out. She didn't see him in the hallway. "He must've gone back to the medical bay for something." She stepped away from the door and toward the Colonel. "How long are you going to keep her in there?" she asked, knowing how long she had been in the room.

"I'm not sure yet. I'm pondering what I want to do with her," he stated. "Did Stark figure out any of those devices yet? Any idea on that chest piece?"

"No, though, he can tell it gives off power and it can be used as a power source but other than that, he can't really know what it does until he takes a long look at it."

"He won't be able to do that," Phillips said as he stared at the glow coming through the nurse outfit. He almost did a doubt take as the glow seemed different, almost lighter. He hoped the battery wasn't dying on it. "It could kill her." Though he couldn't be sure that she was telling the truth, he didn't want to risk her death.

"If she's telling the truth," she stated, unsure of the girl. "He did agree though that it would be risky."

"And the other devices?"

Peggy reached into her pocket and pulled out a bag, which held Toni's communication device. "This device is no longer in working order. Though it doesn't look like it, Stark said the core and the battery were cooked by some kind of wave." She looked it at before offering it to him, but he didn't reach for it.

"Is it fixable?" he asked, still eyeing Toni, who had rested her head on the table. I wonder what she's thinking about, he thought. She was probably thinking of a plan to escape but there was no way that she could. This facility was impossible to escape.

"According to Stark with the core and battery fried, it would be impossible to fix. Then he joked like egoist person that he is, that only a Stark would be able to fix it," she stated annoyed.

"Can he fix it?" the Colonel asked.

Peggy laughed. "No, I don't think he can, but he keeps insisting with time he could be." She glanced at Toni who had picked her head back up and was glaring. It was clear she was restless and annoyed. "However, he's too busy trying to figure out the other device that was found with her."

"Did he get anywhere with it?"

"He's having a difficult time getting power to it to see what it's supposed to do. Every time he gets any power to the device, it burns out everything connected to do it. Either he can't find enough power or there is short in the device and it is overloading everything around it," Peggy stated. "If only, we can get her to talk. That device could be useful against Hitler."

Remembering an earlier conversion he had with Toni, Phillips knew she wouldn't allow them to use it as a weapon. "If she's telling the truth, she won't allow it. She states she doesn't and won't make weapons."

"If she doesn't consider it a weapon, what does she consider it? I think Stark mention that if he isn't careful, it could seriously hurt him."

"Sometimes, the best weapons weren't created to be weapons." He turned to the door. "Let's go find Doctor Erskine and Mr. Stark, and I want to speak with both of them."

"About what, Sir?"

"What we should do with the woman."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

When Carter and Phillips arrived at the labs, they found Dr. Erskine speaking with Howard Stark. Toni's device laid on the table opened with wires attached to it, and each wire was burnt. Tools were spread around table as Howard couldn't locate the tool he wanted. Erskine was staring at blueprints that Howard had drawn up, trying to figure out what the device was supposed to.

"Dr. Erskine," Colonel Phillips spoke as he walked into the room. "I was looking for you." Peggy moved in quietly behind him, almost unnoticed. "I wanted to speak with you about your conversion with Ms….Toni," he said, annoyed he didn't have a last name to refer to her as.

The Doctor stepped away from the table. "I wanted to take another look at the chest piece's blue prints before speaking with you." After studying and scanning the rector, Stark, with the help of Erskine, had drawn out a basic design. They would not know what it did until they took a real look at it. "As I now know its prime function, I can better understand it," he stated.

"And have you found anything out?" Peggy asked from her spot against the door.

Howard turned toward them. "That chest piece works like an electromagnet though I cannot tell what's powering it. It's nothing like I had seen before. I won't know what that is unless I take it a part but I doubt she will let me do that as it is keeping her alive." He leaned against the table with his arms folded against his chest. "As for the other device, I don't have a clue. It keeps, for lack of a better word, eating all the power I supply it and spitting it back out, violently."

Peggy had seen the wires and heard what he had stated before but she didn't think it was that bad. "Violently?"

Howard stuck out his left hand and showed them. It was burnt. "I'm starting to think it has a mind of its own and it hates me, which is impressive as no one or thing hates me."

The Colonel took a deep breath as this was one of the reasons why he hated dealing with Stark. He couldn't stand his pride. "For someone who just got schooled by an unknown woman, you sure have an ego."

Both Peggy and Erskine almost choked keeping back their laugher. "He's a Stark for you," Erskine smiled.

Ignoring the Doctor, Howard glared at Phillips. "Let me talk to her. I'll get her to talk."

"No, I don't think that would be a good idea. She doesn't like you and I don't want to alienate her more," Phillips responded as he crossed to the other side of the table to look at the designs. Peggy followed slowly behind him. "So what did you do to anger her?" He didn't think that they had even met, but they didn't have to meet for Toni to dislike Stark. Howard Stark was the CEO of Stark Industries and a leader in the weapon business. "Break her heart?" he joked. She had stated she didn't make weapons. Maybe, she hated wars and violence.

The weapon expert turned to Phillips, who staring at him with a smirk. "I've been with so many petty dames that it's hard to remember all of them," he joked back.

Peggy sighed. "I don't want to know about your exports."

Howard smiled his cheesy smile at her before turning back to the Colonel. "Though I would've recognized a spicy brunette like Toni." His smile had turned creepy a little. "Or at least a dame with a glowing chest."

The Colonel let out a sigh as Stark was very annoying. "Let's get back to business," Phillips ordered. "I don't think it would be wise for you to speak with Toni."

"What are you planning to do with her?" Erskine asked. "Are you going to speak with her again?"

"No," he stated. "She won't open up or reveal anything to us."

Peggy glanced at Phillips. "She did admit something about the rector to Dr. Erskine. She might slip up again."

Erskine looked down at the blue prints. "It protects her heart, and we now know how. The rector is keeping something out of her heart and I don't think she will admit what or why." He took a deep breath. "That's what's worrying me."

"That's why I'm letting her go," the Colonel stated, surprising everything in the room.

"I don't believe that would be wise," Erskine stated.

"I thought you would have agreed with this, Doctor," Phillips stated.

Erskine was silent for a few minutes. "I don't believe she's a spy for Hitler, but we cannot be sure that she's not a criminal or a danger to the city."

"I agree with you."

Howard looked at Phillips and wondered what he was up to, but it wasn't his place as he was just the weapon expert. Peggy wanted to say something, but she knew it was best not to fight the colonel.

"Then why are you letting her go?" Erskine asked.

Phillips stepped away from the table and walked to the door in silence. As he reached the door, he turned around and spoke, "You cannot judge a person when she knows you're watching. It's when she thinks no one is watching that you judge. We'll see who she is then."

"You're going to have someone follow her?" Peggy asked.

He smiled. "Of course. Agent Carter, please return Toni's items besides that thing to her and release her." He turned leave, but he paused as he opened the door. "Mr. Stark, you can take the device with you. Your personal lab is better equipped to handle that than ours."

"You know she's going to ask for it," Peggy stated, playing with the unfixable communicate device.

"I know she will, and you will tell her Stark has it."

Howard narrowed his eyes. "Telling her that I have it would only send her to me to steal it back." He took a long look at the Colonel and he could see it in this eyes. "But that seems to be what you what."

Erskine's eyes widened as he realized Phillips plan. "If she does try to break into Stark Industries, we will know the truth and will have grounds to hold her. If she doesn't, we'll know that she's not a threat."

"She doesn't stand a chance against my Security," Howard said.

"You shouldn't underestimate your opponent, especially when she had already outsmarted you twice," Erskine smiled, looking at the devices on the table and in Peggy's hands.

Howard simply glared.

"You're counting on her doing as you plan but you don't know if she will," Peggy stated. "Why would she risk it for a broken device? If she's really as smart as she wants us to believe, she could just make a new one."

"I don't think it's unfixable and if it was, that doesn't change the importance of it," Erskine stated as he picked up the device. The burnt wires still hanged from it. "She wouldn't be making a big fuss about it if she didn't need it for something or if she could make a new one."

"And I know she'll go for it. I can see it in her eyes," Phillips started. "Once she's caught, she won't be able to talk her way out of it."

Howard took a deep breath. "She might be telling the truth that there's nothing to hide."

"Either way, we will know," Phillips responded.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

It was stupid he knew, but he couldn't just sit around while others died for their country. However, there wasn't much more Steve Rogers could do as he failed his second attempt to enlist. He wasn't going to give up, even it was hopeless. He knew no one was going to want him, a frail man, who couldn't fight his way out of a wet paper bag, and he hated that. He hated that he couldn't help his country, that he was too weak to do anything. He wished he could do something to help.

"Am I good for anything?" he asked himself, as he passed yet another alley that he was beaten up. "You did save that girl," he told himself, remembering the woman he found in the empty lot a week ago. He hadn't seen a woman so injured before that he didn't know if she would survive. "I wonder if she's okay." After she was taken away, he hadn't seen or heard from her. He had tried calling the local hospitals to make sure she was okay, but there was no record of her at any of the hospitals. That worried him, but that didn't mean anything bad had happened to her.

Bucky already thought he was crazy as he kept trying to enlist, but if he knew that Steve was obsessing over a woman, who he didn't know, he would make him check into a mental hospital. He didn't understand what Steve was going through or what he was thinking. Bucky was a big and strong man, who anyone would want unlike him, who struggled to even open jars.

Steven took a deep breath as he recalled the events from the night that he found the woman. Just moments before he found her, he was laughed out of a recruitment office for the first time. Yes, laughed at, because no one could understand why anyone like him would want to enlist. He could hear the whispers from everyone, teasing that he could be killed by a look alone, and that hurt. It wasn't like he cared what others thought, but these insults hurt because he thought the same. "Can't think like that," he told himself. Like he was doing now, he had taken a long walk in the cold that night; however, he doubted he would come across a bleed woman again. God, he hoped not. He didn't need to be worrying about two unknown women.

Finding her was pure luck as he almost walked right pass the empty lot trying to forget his failures. She had been crying out for help but neither he nor anyone around him could hear her in all the noise. It had been a loud night that day in New York and her cries couldn't be heard over the loud music and voices. If it wasn't for the small cat he chased into the lot trying to save, he would have never found the girl.

That image of her was forever burned into his mind. At first, he was surprised she was alive because she was covered in blood and cut. It was also freezing, and it was a wonder that she was still alive in this weather. For a brief second, he wondered how she got here, because there were no signs that she was dropped here by someone or that she was here for long. The cold would've surely killed her if she was there longer than an hour.

Steve paused, closing his eyes, and took a deep breath. He was a gentleman, and he hated to see any dame in pain. Just by touching her, he could see that she was in extreme pain, and there was nothing he could've done for her a part from getting help.

"Who are you?" he asked. He remembered lowering himself down to her and being shocked at seeing a glow under her shirt. He wasn't sure what that was, but it peaked his interest. What could possibly be glowing under her shirt? At that moment though, he couldn't spend too much time on that as he had to save the woman. However, after making sure she was alright, his mind went back to the glow. He had mentioned the glow to the authorities, who stated he was imagining it. There was no glow. He dropped it, because they were probably right. Why would her chest be glowing? Even if it was, there was probably a reasonable explanation to it.

"And how did you know my name?" he asked, remembering her calling out to him. Taking a deep breath, he shook the memory as it was pointless. He would probably never see her again.

"It's cold. I should get home," he told himself. Bucky was probably worried about him, and he knew his best friend well enough to know that he would come looking for him if he didn't show up soon. Bucky knew what he was up to, and he was already worried about Steve's sanity.

As he rounded the corner the cornered, he noticed a woman, who she wasn't wearing a jacket. "Is she insane?" Steve asked himself. Just to make sure she was okay, he approached her, and to his shock and surprise, it was that lady. "Hey!" He picked up pace.

The woman turned to him with a surprise expression. "Rogers?"

Steve stared at the girl. How does she know my name? He wondered again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :) I wasn't going to add Past Steve into this chapter but I decided to do so at the last secon


	7. Freezing Loneliness

It was a very cold day and Toni was learning this the hard way. Yes, when Agent Carter escorted her out, she knew it was cold, but she didn't expect it would be this cold. She could see her breath. She wished she had a coat, because this sweater wasn't keeping her warm at all. Though she knew, she should be grateful that they let her keep it as she did steal it from a nurse. It did provide her some protection that her regular clothes would not have given at all. Her simple black shirt wouldn't do anything but draw attention.

Toni couldn't guess what day or month this was, because one, she didn't know how long she had been out and two, she wasn't sure how time travel worked or how far she back. She could have gone back 75 years or 75.23 years, and she had no clue how to find out without looking like an idiot, not that she didn't already look at one. Right now, she looks like a chicken without a head. Normally, she knew New York like the back of her hand, but now, she was completely lost. The whole city was different and she couldn't find her away around to save her life, but more importantly, she was unable to locate her father's building. Maybe that was for the best, because there was no way for her to sneak into that company.

Toni glanced down at her broken arm, as it was useless. Even if she was able to hack into that company, the cast would only slow her down and probably get her caught, which was something she couldn't afford. It would also be very stupid to rush in without a second thought, and Toni Stark was not stupid. There was no telling what kind of defenses her father had, but they had to be excellent for the time even if they couldn't compare to her time; however, she knew her father would probably fight her on that.

"I don't even know if Peggy was telling me the truth. It could be a trap," she reasoned. If they wanted to catch her in the act and have a reason to hold her, that would be the way to go. "And how would I even know if he's in New York?" Stark Industries had offices across the country (even the world) and Howard had hidden labs that Toni couldn't begin to locate even with the future knowledge she had. So she could be risking her future to break in for a device that wasn't even there, and she wasn't sure she wanted to do that.

She needed a plan and she would come up with a plan before she tried anything. Or at least, wait until her broken arm wasn't so useless…. That could be months, she thought to herself. Could she wait that long? The longer she waited the more damage she could be doing to the timeline, which she couldn't have. She would like to be born and the tiniest thing could change that. However, she had other more practical things to worry about like where she was going to stay. It was freezing and she wouldn't last long out here for long, but she had nowhere to go. She had no money on her to rent a room and there was no one she could turn too. She had no friends in this time that could take her in.

Toni paused as she thought about her situation, which had never happened to her before. Toni Stark was never without means or opportunities, and now, she had nothing. She was stuck with no money, and it pissed her off. How did anyone get along in life with no money? She couldn't even afford to buy something to eat and food was so much cheaper in the 1940's. "Stupid Stomach," she muttered to herself as it was growling. "Come to think about it, I don't remember the last time I ate." Sure, she had gone days without eating, but she always had the ability to get food. Now, she couldn't. She didn't like that feeling, and she didn't know how anyone could deal with that feeling.

She would admit that she was a spoil brat going up (Some would say still), although she would deny that to Rogers. Every desire (besides her desire to feel her father's love) she had was fulfilled, and every worry she had been taken care of. She didn't have to worry about how she would pay her rent, put food on the table, or last the week. She was very lucky to be born a Stark, and she was relearning how lucky she was. For that, she was very thankful for her father.

"What am I to do?" she asked herself, holding her cold self. Trying to keep herself warm, she kept walking, and every few steps, she would hop. If she could get past her pride, she would try to find a homeless shelter for the night, but she had no idea of where to locate one. There was no internet to Google homeless shelter, but she supposed she couldn't be lazy and use a phone book, which she hadn't used in ages. Did she even remember how to use one? Did they even have payphones?

Maybe, she could lift someone's wallet…I can't do that to some poor bastard, she thought after thinking about it. She couldn't do that to someone, even if she was a heartless bitch, because they probably needed it for his family, who was probably worse off than she. Though I could pay him back once I get to the future, she reasoned. Maybe she could-

"Hey!"

Was someone speaking to her? Why would someone be talking to her? She was no one in this time, and there were other people around her, who the voice was most likely speaking to.

"Hey!"

There were a few glances toward the person calling, but they all turned away once they realized he wasn't talking to them. Maybe, he's really calling to me? She turned and her mouth almost dropped. It was Rogers, but it wasn't Rogers, well the Rogers she knew at least. There in front of her was a small man (if she could call him that), and one word came to mind when she saw him: shrimp. She was sure that he was the smallest man on the planet…Okay, being overly dramatic, and it made her wonder how the hell he became Captain America.

Okay, she knew how; it was his personality and his innocence that got him noticed by the Dr. Erskine. Even now, she could see how kind and sweet he was (oh, it did make her sick a little) just by looking into his eyes, his beautiful eyes. Did I just refer to his eyes as beautiful? What's going on with me? Whatever it was, she didn't care for it one bit. She was Toni F-ing Stark and she did not compliment people unless they were Pepper or Rhodey and she really didn't compliment Steve Rogers.

"Rogers," she muttered as he came closer. She tried to make herself look less pathetic and fragile than she really was, because even in this time, she didn't need his pity. However when he looked her over, Toni knew he was seeing past her deception. She had no idea how he did that, when no one else could.

"Are you crazy?" he asked.

That wasn't the question she was expecting from him, but she had an answer: she wasn't crazy…well not yet anyhow. However, she wasn't able to voice it as her brain was going into overdrive. It was hard to think pass the small person in front of her. He must've been teased so much, she thought, sadly. She wasn't aware of his life before he became an America's icon, but as he didn't speak about it, she was sure it wasn't good. She didn't blame him on that one, because she didn't want to talk about her messed up childhood as well.

"Hello?"

Shaking out of her thoughts, she smiled weakly. "I'm not crazy."

"Then why are you out here without a coat?" he asked, softly. There was worry in his voice, which shocked her, as she was a complete stranger to him in this time. "It's very cold out here."

"I know," she stated annoyed. She wasn't stupid; she knew it was cold out here. "Do you always ask strangers if they are crazy or am I just lucky?" she asked. She didn't know what was up with herself these days. Her mood was constantly changing and she was beginning to wonder if she was bipolar.

Rogers took a step back. "No, Ma'ma, I didn't mean any disrespect. I just wanted to make sure you were okay as no dame should be out here without a coat."

She didn't know if she should be insulted or touched by what he said, so she picked insulted. Toni could never go wrong with that. "I'm quite capable in taking care of myself, you know." She held her broken arm close to her body.

"I never said you weren't."

"Good, because I'm not," Toni stated, eyeing him. "Do you know where the closer homeless shelter is?" she asked. Though she had no interest whatsoever in going, she knew she had no other choice; plus, it would be nice to get out of the cold. She didn't know how much more she could stand it.

"…A homeless shelter? Why?" He was concerned about her and it was clear. Toni wished she knew the reason, because why would a stranger be worried about someone he didn't know? "There aren't many around and I don't know of any off the top of my head." He stepped toward her. "Why would you need a shelter? Why can't you go home? I can walk with you if you like."

It was a really sweet of him, but it was a bit creepy as well. If she didn't know Rogers, she would think he was some kind of serial killer. "Why? So you can murder me in dark alley?" she joked. You know, Rogers could be the prefect serial killer with the right strategy, she thought as no one would suspect him, the shrimp.

Toni didn't think it was possible but Steve's face was red like a cherry and his mouth was moving a mile per second. "No…I-I'm…being….f-friendly…." There was a pause as he took a deep breath. "I just wanted to make sure you get home safe."

"If there was a home for me to go to, I wouldn't be asking for a homeless shelter," she replied. She held the bag, with her belongs, tight in discomfort. And there was pity in his eyes, which was something she really didn't want. It almost made her want to punch him.

He took a long look at her. "Wait, why is that? Did something happen? Don't you have any friends or family to take you in?" he asked, not giving her any time to answer.

"You're asking a lot of personal questions," she countered. Remind me later when I get to my time to beat Rogers. He's annoying, she told herself. Sure, he was annoying in her time, but he didn't ask so many questions in her time. He knew better.

Hearing her comment, Rogers looked like someone kicked his puppy. "I don't mean to intrude, but I can't believe such a beautiful dame like yourself don't have anyone to turn to." His face was flushed as he spoke.

"Dame?" she smiled. She didn't think she was ever referred to that before in her life. "I'm dame. Interesting."

Rogers stared at her confused. She had him going around in circles, which wasn't too hard to do. "Again, I don't mean to disrespect you," he stated, unsure of what to say anymore.

Toni waved it off. "Don't worry about it. I'm not insulted this time and I was joking with you. Geez, you need to lighten up." He couldn't take a joke in her time as well, which was funny and interesting. "Anyways, the homeless shelter. Do you know anyone who would know of one?" she asked.

He took a deep breath. "Maybe, Bucky would know." It would be useless to ask why she needed a homeless shelter again because she wasn't going to tell him why.

Bucky? She thought to herself. What was a Bucky? Or was it a who? She would assume it was a person as she doubted Rogers was a type of person who would name an inanimate object. "Bucky?" she asked. "That isn't a weapon you kill helpless, not that I am helpless, women with?" she joked again. Though I'm helpless at the moment. She didn't like that thought at all.

Again, Rogers stared at her. "No," he stated a little bit too strongly. "He's my roommate. His name is James Barnes, but I call him Bucky," he said quickly.

The word cute came to her mind when she thought about Rogers. She couldn't understand how he could be so innocent when he was who he was. Sure, he wasn't the Famous Captain yet and he hadn't faced any traumatic experiences yet, but he was like this in the future as well. Though she couldn't be sure, she believed it wasn't because of the time he grew up in. "How did you come up with the nickname Bucky?" That a part that she was curious about and she would like to hear that story.

A flash of red crossed his face. "Long story," he joked.

Wait!... Barnes, if she remembered correctly, had died in the war while working with Captain Rogers, and she had heard from her father that Rogers didn't take it well. "And how does that help me?" she asked. She started to feel pity for him, which annoyed her. She hated when people felt pity her, so she assumed he would as well.

"Come with me and maybe, he'll be able to help."

He really was naïve, wasn't he? Or was it just this time? She would give him the benefit of the time for now. "If I didn't already think you were a murderer, I do now," she laughed.

"You joke a lot," he reasoned. There was an annoyance in his voice.

"Yup," she stated. Maybe, I should just cool it. "If I insult you, I'm sorry. It's who I am or so I am told….a lot of people call me an asshole for my teasing. That I don't take anything serious." Maybe, that was why she couldn't keep friends. She took a deep breath. "Any help would be great though."

"I'm fine. It didn't bother me," he stated.

She knew he was lying, because she had seen it in his face and had heard it in his voice; however, she wasn't going to call him on it.

"I live this way," he smiled. She followed him.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Without knowing where he lived (she knew it was somewhere in Brooklyn), she had no idea if they were close, which made the walk even more awkward. They had walked mostly in silence as she had no idea of what to say to him. She didn't want to insult him again, because it would happen again if she said something as Toni Stark was an asshole.

As they walked, Toni kept noticing him glancing back at her. What's going on in that head of his? She asked herself. Was it because of the neighborhood they were walking into? It was bad. Was he embarrassed by where he lived? He shouldn't be. She already knew who he was and where he came from (not the whole story but still); he didn't need to worry about what she was thinking… But maybe he should, she thought, knowing how judgmental she was at times.

"So what do you do for a living?" she asked, knowing very little of what he did before becoming the Captain. She just knew he was a poor kid from Brooklyn.

He looked back at her. "I draw for newspapers and stuff."

"That sounds cool," she said, trying to start up a conversion. She could only take so much silence. "Can I see some of your work?" She had never seen Rogers' work as he was very guarded with it. She had asked a few times, which only resulted in him glaring at her and asking why she even cared.

"If you really want to." Rogers smiled lightly as he looked back. "What do you do?" he asked, changing the subject. "Are you a nurse?"

Urgh, why did I ask that? Since she was so smart, she should've guessed that he was going go ask that. Now, how was she going to response to that? There was really nothing she could say without looking crazy. "I don't know," she stated, saying the first thing off her mind.

He stopped and turned to her. "What?"

"I don't remember much," she lied. She knew it would be the best answer, because he wouldn't be able to question her. "I woke up in a hospital a few days ago with no memory of who I was or where I was," she stated slowly.

"Wait, the hospital couldn't find your family?"

"No."

"And they just let you go?"

He was angry and Toni could tell. Again, it was cute to see how he reacted over a total stranger. "Well, I didn't want to stay there, and I'm stubborn."

"How would you know you are stubborn?" he asked.

Toni looked at him. "Good, question. I don't know but this present me is," she laughed.

"So you figure a homeless shelter is better than the hospital?" he asked with smile.

Toni had to admit, though not out loud or to him, that he had a nice smile. "I don't like to rely on people. And I do remember some things, just not a whole lot." She decided it would be foolish to have total memory lost.

"That's good at least," he replied.

"Anyhow, it's getting colder. Let's start walking again," she stated.

"Oh," he muttered as he was struck with a thought. He unzipped his jacket. "Here, use my coat."

"No...NO!" Toni objected. She did not want that. "You keep it."

Rogers looked taken back by her objection but he still insisted. "You're shivering. How long have you been out here in the cold without a coat? Didn't they give you anything?"

Again, his innocent and sweetness was shocking to her. "No, they didn't," Toni answered as he wrapped his coat around her shoulders. She didn't know if it was just her or if the coat, but she was really warm now. "You're going to be cold now."

Rogers was wearing a long sleeve dress shirt, which didn't seem to provide him with any warmth. "I'm not going to let a lady freeze." He smiled his innocent cute smile. "And we almost at my apartment. I'm fine."

"k," she muttered, still amazed at his character. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." From this point, he walked next to her. "How much do you remember?"

"My name is Toni and…" She paused as she thought about what she 'wanted to remember.' "And that's about it. I don't know who my family is, but I suspect they would've found me if I had any or if they cared. I remember a few things that I like and don't like." She shrugged. "…Not much if I think about it."

"No last name?"

"Nope, that would be helpful, wouldn't it?" she joked. She eyed him from the corner of her eye. This conversion was the longest conversion she had with Rogers without an argument.

"It would be," he smiled back. He reached a little over her shoulder at his height now and it was weird to look down at him, because in her time, he was the one that had to look down. "I'm not surprise you can't remember," he stated. "When I found you, you were a mess. There had been a big gash and blood on your face."

Toni was taken back as she had totally forgotten about him finding her. She thought she had been seeing things when she was found in that empty lot. "That was you? That must've been an ugly sight." Without thinking, she reached her hand to cut on her forehead. The good thing about being out for a week was that most of her nicks and scratches were healed. The slash on her forehead was mostly healed with a small band aid covering it.

Rogers stopped in front a building, which she assumed was his apartment. "I was. I was worried that you weren't alive as I didn't think anyone could survive that. So I'm glad that I ran into you, because I couldn't get you out of my mind."

She eyed as he led her to the building. "Thinking about me?"

"Yea, just wanted to make sure you were okay. You were in such a bad shape," he stated as the opened the door for her. She followed him in knowing he wasn't going to hurt her. "It's good to see you're okay, well for the most part."

As Toni walked up the stairs behind him, she realized she had never asked him for his name. Yes, she already knew his name, but he didn't know she knew it. Wait….she thought as she remembered something. She had called him Rogers before and she was sure he had heard it. "I think I remember you now. Rogers was it?" she asked.

"Yea, Steve Rogers."

"Okay, thank you, Mr. Rogers," she said. It felt very weird to call him Mister.

"You can call me Steve."

Rogers had never asked her to call him Steve, and she didn't know if she would be comfortable enough to call him that if he asked. Besides, they mostly just called each other by their last name and she was good with that as they weren't really friends. "Thanks, Steve."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

"This is it," Rogers announced as they came across a door at the end of the hallway.

Toni looked around, and if the hallway was used to judge, that apartment wasn't going to be a million bucks apartment, but she wasn't going to complain. She was out of the cold and she was very thankful for that. Maybe, she could sleep in the lobby instead of a shelter. "This seems like a nice building," she said, forcing out the words.

After unlocking the door, Roger pushed the door open and walked in. Toni followed in after him and shocked at the state of apartment. "This is…nice." She wasn't expecting this from Rogers.

"It's home," he smiled.

She didn't know what to expect from the Rogers of this time, but she wasn't expecting a messy as hell apartment from Rogers, who never had a hair out of place. He was as neat as they came. "No, girlfriend to help clean?" she asked, knowing that he didn't have an important other. He was innocent as they came to love, and she wasn't even sure he ever kissed a girl before.

His face got red again. "N-No," he stuttered.

"So this is a bachelor pad. That makes sense."

"Hey, it is-" Rogers started.

"About time you got home," a man interrupted as he entered the main room from what appeared to be a bedroom. He gave Rogers a smile before turning to eye her.

"Hey, Bucky," Rogers greeted. "Sorry, I'm late. I got a little distracted."

"Doing what?" Barnes asked, still eyeing her. There was a question look in his eyes as he studied her. It was clear that his roommate didn't bring random women home with him.

Toni, who was still wearing Rogers' coat, was eyeing Barnes right back. She had no idea of why they were having an eye staring contest, but she wasn't going to lose. She didn't lose often and she refused to be beat by James Barnes, even if he was a delicious eye candy.

"You know that girl I found in that lot. This is her," he answered.

Barnes glanced toward his best friend before turning back to Toni, who had turned away. She sensed a battle between the two starting and she wanted nothing to do with it, even if it was all about her. She turned and looked for a way out, but she saw none, even if she was very good at sneaking. However, she might be able to go out the front door without them noticing. "Hi," she waved, unsure what to say.

"Hello," Barnes replied, trying to be nice.

"You know, I tried to talk him into taking me to a homeless shelter but it didn't work," she shrugged. "He just brought me here instead."

He stared at her confused. "Why would you go to a shelter?"

Rogers answered, "She had nowhere else to go."

"And you brought her here?" Barnes asked, still eyeing her.

Okay, she knew she was eye candy herself, but he didn't need to stare at her like that. People were only allowed to stare at her like that if they were about to have sex. She wouldn't mind to see how he was in bed but she knew that wasn't going to happen. That would be a very bad idea.

"I wasn't going to leave her out in the cold," Rogers countered.

"I get that, but can I talk to you in private, Steve?" Barnes asked, pointing to his room.

Toni knew what that meant; they wanted to talk about her without her in the room. Normally, she would make a scene and demand they say it in front of her face, but she doubted that would be wise in this situation. "Don't mind me," she waved the two off as she wondered off to the window.

"Thanks," Barnes said as he dragged Rogers off into one of the bedroom and closed the door.

Toni watched from the corner of her eyes and took a deep breath. Maybe, she could just leave now and they would never know…. Or okay, they would but that was beside the point. They wouldn't find out until she was gone and that would be too late for them to find her… Besides, she didn't need to be here and she didn't need their charity. I should just go, she thought, even if it was foolish.

Turning her attention to the window, she stared out. "Of course, it would start snowing. If there's a God, he hates me, a lot," she sighed. Taking a long slow breath, she thought. After a few minutes of silence, she crossed to the front door. "I should give this back," she stated, taking off Rogers' warm coat. "I should probably put more clothes on, though."

In her bag, she had the t-shirt and jeans she came in from the future, and though it did not fit the time, it would keep her warmer than she was. She took out the articles and laid them on the couch. Without taking off the nurse's uniform (an annoying dress), she went to put her jeans, but she didn't know where to begin. She got down on the floor and laid out her jeans in front of her. Using one leg to hold down the pants, she slid the other leg in. After she had one leg in a little bit, she put the other one in. "How am I going to pull them up?" she whispered to herself.

Toni got to her knees and tried to pull her pants up that way, but she couldn't keep them up with one hand as each time she pulled one side up, the order side fell. "Ah," she uttered in her struggle as she fell forward. If it wasn't for the chair, she would've fallen on her face. She looked up at the closed door, waiting to see if they heard. Not hearing anything, she turned her attention back to her pants.

After laying herself on the ground, she had been able to work her pants up as she used her legs to push herself off the ground. "Now, here comes the hard part," she told herself. After a few attempts of trying to button them, she decided it would be useless if she couldn't hold one side still. She would need both hands. After freeing her broken arm from the sling, she tried to reach it down to hold her pants still, but she couldn't hold it for long. It was painful to work her arm like that but she needed to button her pants. "Got it," she whispered after a few moments of pain.

Before returning her arm to her sling, she turning the shirt inside out (so no one could see the symbol on the shirt), and pulled it over the dress. It was difficult but it was easier than putting on the pants. She just had to put it over her head and slide her arms through. She almost got stuck at one point, but it didn't take much strength to pull it down. After she was able to straighten her shirt, she put the sweater back over.

"What else do I have in this bag?" she asked. With her good arm she reached into her bag (not caring about her broken phone), she pulled out the boots she had been wearing. "Yes," she said, loudly. She turned and eyed the door that the guys disappeared behind. Did they hear her that time? "They've been in there a long time." She wasn't going to wait for them to come out.

After changing shoes and put the nursing shoes back into the bag (she might need them for later), she crossed to the door. "Bye, Steve," she whispered as she opened the door. Even now, saying his first name was weird, and she would probably never say it again.


	8. Mystery Memories.

"I don't know what the big deal is," Steve said. They were in his bedroom, which had seen better days. Unlike most of the apartment, it was neat and clean, while the furniture in the room was old and mismatched like the rest of the apartment.

Bucky look a deep long breath, unsure of what to say. "You don't bring girls home," he replied from the corner of the room, while staring at the wall.

"So? Are you the only one who can?" he asked annoyed. Bucky, who wasn't sly at all, was a ladies' man and could get any woman that he wanted, which had annoyed Steve. There were times, though he tried to be sneaky about it, that Steve had seen women leave his room, which was awkward to say the least.

"Is this jealously?" Barnes asked.

Steve took a deep breath. "No, this isn't."

"Then what is this?" Bucky asked, eyeing his roommate. "Why bring her home? Is there something going on with you?"

"Why must there be something wrong with me? Why can't I just do the right thing?"

Bucky didn't speak right away as he thought about what he was going to say. "I've been worried about you for a while now, because you haven't been thinking. Also, you never brought a woman home before," he said as he took a seat on the bed. "Plus, why would she come home with you?"

"Really?" Steve snapped. "Am I really that pathetic to you?"

There was a glare in Steve's eyes that Bucky had never seen before. Steve had been pissed at him many times for some reason or another, but he had never seen him this mad before and Bucky really didn't understand why. He didn't say anything that was untrue or wrong. It was no secret that Steve had no luck or game with the ladies. "I didn't mean it like that," he stated, thinking he might have crossed the line. "You and ladies just don't mix, but I'm sorry if I insulted you."

Steve took a deep breath. "I know." Even if he was be able to work up the nerve to speak with a beautiful dame, he didn't know what to say or how to act. He was also wasn't the type of man that attracted woman. "But you make it sound like she's using me." He knew it was possible but he didn't want to think about it.

"You don't even know who she is?... She doesn't know who she is," Bucky commented. "She could be some murderer or at least dangerous. I know she's gorgeous, but that doesn't mean this is smart."

Steve laughed. "Someone like her isn't capable of murder. When is the last time you heard of a dame killing someone? They don't have a mean bone in their body." He turned his attention to a photo of his mother on his nightstand.

"There are a few dames, who I think of, that are," Bucky countered, with a chuckle. "But, what do you expect to do with that girl? If I remember correctly, she was looking for a homeless shelter."

Blowing out in a big huff, Steve crossed to the only window in his room, which's view was of a brick wall. "She was, but she's injured and has memory lost. I don't want her in a homeless shelter or anything like that. Those places would eat her alive"

"You are always the gentleman."

"I know."

"So how long do you expect to her to stay here?" Bucky asked with a weak smile on his face. "I do have to say: she's quite the looker."

Steve narrowed his eyes. "You would say that. Stay away from her; there're other dames out there if you need a fix," he stated, annoyed. "And I don't know. We can decide tomorrow." He took a deep breath.

"I have a feeling you won't let her go," Bucky said, knowingly.

"I can't just let her go if she has no place to go. Look it's snowing out there," Steve said, pointing out the window. It was coming down in big flakes and it was hard to see the ugly brick wall.

"Your heart is too big at times."

"So you would be able to kick her out on the streets?"

Barnes gave him a smile. "No, I would just invite her to my bed. She's easy on the eyes." He was smirked with a chuckle.

"No!" Steve yelled. "Just stay away from her." He didn't know why, but he didn't like Barnes saying that.

"Whoa, it was a joke. Geez," Barnes muttered as he put his hands up in defense. "If I didn't know better, I would think you liked her."

Steve huffed. "I don't like her. I don't know her, though I'm interested to find out why she was in that empty lot. Don't you think?" He watched his roommate. "What's on your mind?"

Bucky crossed to the door, as he wanted to check on the girl. She had been making weird sounds in there, which didn't sit well with him. "Many things, but you might not like the answer." Again there was a chuckle in his voice.

Steve glared. "Either you're negative or perverted. I don't know which is worse." He walked pass his best friend and out into the living room. It took a few seconds for Steve to realize that Toni was missing. "Where did she go?" he asked shocked and worried. "She had nowhere to go." His heart started to beat fast at the thought of her alone in the snow. "She could die out there." When he had found her the first time, she was almost frozen to death. Her lips had been blue.

"Steve."

"I have to find her," he spoke quickly as he crossed to his coat that she left on the couch. "What was she thinking?" He paused as he felt himself get angry. "She wasn't." He was getting angrier at her with each passing second. "Didn't she think we would worry about her?"

"Steve."

After zipping up his coat, he crossed to the closet for a better pair of shoes. The ones he was wearing now were falling apart. "Is she stupid? Why couldn't she just wait?"

"Steve."

"What?" Steve snapped.

Bucky walked to Steven and put his hand on best friend's shoulder. "Calm down and take a deep breath. You're getting worked up over a total stranger."

"You just want me to let her freeze?" He was glaring again.

"I didn't say that," Bucky stated defending himself. He reached into the closet grabbing his coat. "You're getting worked and it's not helping you. Plus, it must be hard for her to be in a stranger's house with no memory of who she is."

"You're going to come out with me?"

"I'm not going to let my best friend look for a pretty dame by himself," Barnes smiled as he zipped up his coat. "Let's go."

"Thanks," Steve muttered as they both left the apartment, which was near the top of the old building. "I don't know where she would go. It might be worthless to go look for her and that worries me." New York was a big city and there were so many places that Toni could've gone. At this time of the night, there was no where she could go to get out of the cold. What was he going to do if he couldn't find her? Could he just leave her out in the cold, where she could die?

"We'll find Toni," Bucky spoke. He took the lead as Steve was filled with worry. He could see the doubt and worry in Steve's eyes, which was strange. Steve had never been the guy to run in fear, when he should have. There had been times that Steven should've run. He had gotten his ass kicked at many times because he wouldn't back down from a fight. He was an idiot at times.

"I know."

Bucky glanced behind him at Steve, who was staring hard in front of him. "Then believe it."

"Wait," Steve said suddenly as he stopped

"…What?"

"Let me go back and get a coat for her. She doesn't have one and she could be freezing."

"Okay," Bucky replied as he watched his roommate turn and run back to their apartment. After he was out of sight, he spoke, "Of course, he would think of a coat when we're almost at the lobby."

Not wanting to wait on the stairwell, Bucky continued down to the lobby. The building was quiet for the most part except for a few wild men, who were drinking far too much. "They must be going off to the war," he muttered as he walked pass the open door. They were wearing military uniforms, which was what attracted the women (who were losing article of clothes with each passing moment) to them. He had the desired to close the door but he fought it as he didn't want to be noticed by them. That was a fight he didn't want.

"Finally," he muttered as he entered the dark lobby, freeing himself from the noise of the party upstairs (if he could call it a party). "I wonder how long Steve's going to be." He crossed to one of the navy blue chairs to sit, when he noticed Toni sitting on the dirty white floor in the corner of the room. She was staring out the window at the heavy snow. "Toni," he called as he walked to her.

Toni glanced at him before turning back to the window. "I was going to leave but I had nowhere to go, and it was cold. I was too chicken to face the snow." Her voice was quiet and it was hard to hear her.

She was still wearing the white dress and sweater but she had added jeans and some kind of black shirt to her outfit. The jeans were an interesting touch as Barnes hadn't seen a woman wear jeans before, granted he hadn't seen many dames wear pants either. "So you decided to sleep here?" he asked as he took a seat next to her on the cold ground.

"Better here than a park bench."

"True," he replied, eyeing her from the corner of his eye. "Do you work out?" he asked, noting her well-fit body.

"I don't know," she stated as she leaned back slowly and stared up at the ceiling.

He watched her body language as she moved. "Why don't you come back up to the apartment? It's chilly down here." Though the door was close, there was a cold draft.

"Not that cold," she stated, closing her eyes. After a few seconds, she opened her eyes, but they didn't stay opened for long. "And I don't want to burden you. I hate to be a burden." She was fighting to stay awake. "That's the last thing I want to be."

"A pretty thing like you wouldn't ever be a burden," Bucky said. "And before you ask, I won't let you go to a homeless shelter." At hearing the weakness in her voice, he decided he didn't want her anywhere near one of those death shelters.

"I had always been burden," Toni stated, opening her eyes again slowly. "I promised myself that I wouldn't be."

"Who said you were?" he asked, looking her over. Her eyes were closed again and her chest was moving up and down ever so slowly. She didn't respond. "Toni," he called. Toni didn't respond again. "Toni?" He reached out to her and placed his hand on her shoulder, but she didn't stir.

"She must be sleeping."

Bucky almost jumped at the voice. He turned to see Steve leaning against the wall with a jacket in his arms. He looked a little ruffed up. "What happened to you?" he asked, keeping his voice down. "You didn't try to tell the idiots in apartment 205 to shut it, did you?"

Steve stared at Bucky. "They were disturbing the other residents. What was I supposed to do?"

"Let it go," he stated, getting to his knees next to the sleeping Toni. He picked her up and held her close to his body. There was a chill in her body, which he didn't like. "One of these days, you're going to get yourself killed by taking on someone too big."

Steve let Bucky walk pass him before he said anything. "This is about me wanting to join the army, isn't it?"

"If you want to fight, Steve, we can do that, but let's get Toni in bed," he stated walking up the steps. Her head was rested against his shoulder and he could feel her breath on his neck.

"I don't want to fight with you."

"It seems like you do."

"Because, you think you're right, and you're not."

Barnes took a deep breath instead of speaking back because there was nothing he could say to Steve. It was no secret that Steve and he disagreed about things.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

It was silent between the two as they didn't know what to say to each other without starting a fight. Both of them knew if they spoke, they would regret it. Steve couldn't just stand by and let things happen even if he knew he was going to lose the fight. Barnes, on the other hand, over thought things at times, which made him slow to action, and he had often given up on things that he thought was impossible.

Steve opened the door to the apartment for Bucky as he carried Toni in. During the walk up, she hadn't stirred which shocked both of them as they expected her to make some noise or something. "You can take her to my room and I can take the couch," Steve offered, as he opened the door to his room.

Steve folded down the blankets so Barnes could set her down on the twin size bed gently. Before stepping away, Bucky slid her boots off gently so Steve could pull the old blankets over her. They both turned away and started to step out of the bedroom.

"No," Toni muttered.

"Toni, are you okay?" Steve asked, going back to her. Was she talking to them? Calling him back?

"I won't do it," she protested, kicking the blankets off of her. She was tossing and turning wildly. "Stop it. Just stop it, please." Her voice was weak. "…Please."

"Toni," Steve called and reaching out to her. "It's okay. It's okay." He was almost singing to her.

Bucky crossed to him. "She's having a nightmare." He wasn't sure what to do to help with nightmares, but he was sure that they couldn't just leave her.

"We should wake her," he stated, eyeing the pained expression on her face.

"No, I was told that that was one of the worse things you can do," Barnes stated. "We have just to comfort her through it."

For the next few minutes, Steve remained beside her until she was quiet. Bucky was the first one to leave, as this was not his area and he felt uncomfortable. After leaving her side, Steve lingered in the doorway watching her. He wanted to make sure she was okay, before he left her. After a few silent minutes, Steve exited the room even if he was still worried.

Steve found his roommate siting at the small table with a deep worried expression on his face. "What do you think she had been through to have dreams like that?" Steve asked as he took a set across from Bucky.

"I don't know but it couldn't have been good." Bucky blew out in a large puff before standing. "It's late. Let's get some sleep."

Steve looked at him. "You're probably right." He glanced back to his bedroom before turning to the couch.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Having woken up early to do something, Steve returned a couple of hours later to find Bucky once again sitting at the table staring at him. In front of him was today's newspaper, which was opened to some war article. Steve stared at the picture with the same old desire of joining the army and helping his country but no one wanted him.

"Where have you been?" Bucky asked, noticing a bag Steve's hand. "Shopping?"

Steve put the bag down and placed his coat in the closet. "Yes."

Bucky eyed his roommate as he knew something was up. "Is that it? Or did you try and enlist again?" He stood up annoyed. "Why do you keep doing that?" he asked, trying to keep his voice down as not to wake the girl. "You're just going to hurt yourself."

Though he wanted to say some smart back, Steve couldn't as Bucky did have a point. "There's always something I can do. I can't sit and do nothing."

Bucky sighed. "I understand." He glanced back to the newspaper, which was laying overtop of something. Only a corner of a white envelope was visible. "But you need to think this through."

"So is Toni still sleeping?" Steve asked, changing the subject.

"Yes, soundly, I might add." Bucky hadn't heard anything from her, which didn't mean she wasn't having nightmare. He really couldn't tell unless she made a noise or something. He had checked on her randomly to see how she was doing, and everything seemed okay.

"Geez, it's like 10 am."

"Want your bed back?" Bucky chuckled. During one of those checkups in the middle of the night, he had seen how uncomfortable his best friend was on the couch. At one point, Steve had taken to the floor, and Bucky didn't blame him. He had napped on that couch one time and he would never do it again.

"I would never turn down a bed," he smiled.

"So what are we going to do with her?" Bucky asked as he would never be able to throw her out on the street.

Under the window stood an old oak writing desk, which had belonged to Steve's father. There were many scratches and dents in the old faded wood, but Steve would never do away with it. When he was younger, Steve would watch his father work at the desk with the thought that he would do the same one day. It brought a smile to his face whenever he used it. It was where he worked, and at times, where he thought. It was where Steve was headed now. "I want to help her get back to her feet."

"That might take a while," Bucky stated, as he eyed Steve.

With his back to his friend, he took a seat and stared out the window. He had gotten lucky. He had made it back to the apartment before it started to rain down ice. "So be it."

"Are you sure?" There it was again: worry. Bucky was very easy to read at times.

Steve leaned back in his old pine chair that didn't match the desk, which wasn't surprising. Nothing really matched in the apartment besides the ugly kitchen chairs. "Yes."

Bucky turned to the bag that Steve had set down. "What's in the bag?"

"I thought Toni needed something else to wear. Did you see those clothes she had been wearing?" Steve asked.

"I have."

"Anyway, I have to work," he stated, picking up his work bag from the side of the desk. Like the rest of the apartment it was old and ugly, but again, it was special. It was his father's.

"Be careful and stop trying to enlist," he stated as he watched Steve put his old faithful coat back on.

"I can't make any promises," Steve smiled as he exited, leaving Bucky alone with the still sleeping Toni.


	9. False Safely

She was warm and comfortable, which she hadn't felt in a long time. Toni felt safe sleeping in what had to be a bed, as no couch was this comfortable though some of her couches in her labs could compete. She hadn't felt this way in a long time. Even after she had let the Avengers in, she hadn't felt like this. She couldn't really be herself around them as she felt like they were always judging her. She knew she could be imagining it all, but she had seen theirs eyes. She had seen Rogers' eyes, which could always shoot right through her.

"Sleep headache," she muttered to herself. "I must've slept too long." She laughed as she thought about her sleeping patterns. Usually, she never slept this much, only having about 4 hours of sleep a night if that. She had been yelled at so many times about it by every single Avenger and…Pepper. Toni would rather face each Avenger and even Loki than face an angry Pepper.

Slowly opening her eyes, Toni played with the idea that this whole time traveling thing was just a nightmare, but she knew that wasn't the case. As soon as she opened her eyes, she knew she was still living in this nightmare. Yes, she considered this situation to be a total nightmare. She wouldn't call this her worst fear, but it was one of her fears. She was totally alone with no idea of how to get back. For once in her life, her brain was letting her down.

She grimaced as she pushed herself up into a sitting position with her good arm. It was difficult because she was in some extreme pain. "I need meds," she told to herself. She didn't like that because she didn't want to get addicted to that stuff, which could happen if she took too much. "Stupid arm," she muttered. "Can I just crop it off? Who needs an arm?"

Toni kicked the blankets off her and swung her feet off the bed. "Wait, why am I in a bed?" She remembered leaving the apartment, while Barnes and Rogers argued over her. Usually, she didn't mind when men fought over her, but she didn't like that _they_ were fighting over her. They were best friends. She closed her eyes, trying to remember what happened. "Oh, I was sitting down in the lobby, when I fell asleep. They must've come across me. URGH!" She shook her head as she remembered Barnes kneeing beside her. "I so need to get out of here." She wondered for a second as to why he brought her back. Barnes didn't even want her here to begin with and she didn't blame him.

"This rooms so needs a makeover," she stated, taking a long look around. Nothing in the room really matched, and it all looked like it came from a junk yard. "…Wait, is this Rogers' room?" Was Rogers in the lobby as well? She didn't see him but he must've been if she ended up in his room. Why did they have to put her in _his_ room? And where did he sleep? He must've slept in the couch like a little champ. Did he just want to show the world that he was perfect? "Rogers," she muttered, annoyed. She knew she was judging him with a bias opinion, but she didn't want to see him as any other way. In her eyes, he couldn't just be a nice guy, who generally cared about her. He had to be the know-it-all bastard, who had to point out everything that she did done wrong. He had to be an egoist asshole, who had to save someone every single day. "Stupid, Rogers."

However, she had to give it to Rogers: he knew how to make a room comfortable. His room had a homely feeling that her tower so dearly missed. He had more pictures in this one room than she did in her whole tower and that was saying something. "He looks happy," she said, picking up a photo of him and, who she assumed to be, his parents. They looked like one big happy family, and that annoyed Toni, who slammed the photo down a little too hard. The glass shattered. "Shit," she muttered, feeling like an idiot.

She tried to fit the broken glass back into the frame, though it was pointless. He would surely notice…though he would probably say it was nothing even if it was. It was something he did just to avoid hurting her feelings. Again, that annoyed her. Why did he have to be so perfect?! "Why do you always lose your temper, Stark?" she asked herself, knowing that she wasn't perfect at all. Why was she jealous of Rogers? "Because…" Toni took a deep breath as she closed her eyes. He had everything. He had a loving family and the respect that she dreamt of. There was also the fact that he got the attention from her father that she always wanted. He was everything her father wanted, while she was nothing. He had a whole nation that loved him, while she had a whole nation that wanted to see her fail. How did he get to be so lucky?

Getting to her feet, she crossed to the mirror in the room, which she was surprised he had. Toni took a long look at herself, and she had to give it to herself. She did beat Rogers in one thing, even if she was a hot mess, and that was being hot. Roger couldn't even touch that; however, she knew at this time (still unsure of what year it was) though, he was cuter. "Toni, Toni. What am I going to do with you?" she asked with a small smile.

She patted herself on the cheek before running her good hand through her messy hair. "Stupid hair." It was a mess and she had no way to fix it. "Maybe, I should just cut it all off," she told herself as she combed her hair with her hands. Pepper wouldn't be here to stop her. She eyed a pair of scissors at the end of the dresser, and after a few seconds of staring, she reached for them. She brought it to her hair, but she couldn't do it. Sure, she didn't care what her hair looked like, but she didn't want to slaughter it, which was what would happen if she cut it herself.

"Chicken," she called herself. She took another deep breath as pulled down her shirt to stare at her chest. Her Arc Reactor wasn't as bright as it was supposed to be, which scared the shit out of her, and she had none of the proper tools to fix it. Even in the cave, she had resources, but here, there was nothing. Did the tools she need even exist here? She could die if she didn't get to that device in time. "How much time do I have?" she asked herself. She would have to keep an eye on it and hope she would get to her device in time.

Toni released her shirt, allowing it to hide the reactor. Maybe, it was a good thing it wasn't as bright. "Toni, keep it together," she told herself. She had to keep her head on her shoulder if she wanted to get through this. She lowered her head to the dresser and rested it there for a few seconds. "Need to act like a Stark…like a Stark," she repeated. She didn't know what it really meant to act like a Stark though. "I can wing it like I always do."

Picking herself back up, she decided to face them. "I'm really a child, ain't I?" Shaking her head, she headed out. Toni opened the door slowly to not alert anyone to her presence. She wanted to scope things out first before talking to them. From Rogers' bedroom only the small kitchen was visible, and from what she could see, there was no one in there. Toni stepped out slowly, still keeping an eye out. _Maybe, I can sneak out now before anyone knows I'm gone,_ she thought to herself. _Yea, but you don't have shoes. They took them from you,_ she countered. Toni glanced down at her feet. She was still wearing her hospital soaks, which were an ugly color of gray.

She shook her head. "Toni, keep focus." Rogers had always said that she got distracted way too easily, and she would yell at him each time he said it, but now, she guessed he was right. She glanced around the room before rounding the corner, which brought the rest of the small apartment into view. To her joy, she didn't see anyone, which was weird. Why would anyone leave a stranger alone in their home? That was just stupid. "Idiots."

Shaking her head, she noticed a newspaper on the table. "Great, now I can see what year this is." She picked up the paper, but she didn't look at it. Underneath the newspaper was a white letter like paper. She knew she shouldn't look at it as it wasn't her business but she couldn't help it. She never could mind her own business, which she was yelled at constantly about.

Toni picked up the paper. "These are enlistment papers," she stated, as she glanced them over. These papers belonged to Barnes, which wasn't all too surprising. Though the Captain didn't speak about it, she knew Barnes had enlisted and died in the war. It was the push that Rogers needed, but she wouldn't wish that on anyone. "You know you can change that," she said to herself. She had the power to rewrite history. Sighing, she knew she couldn't do that, and she put the paper down.

"Noisy, are we?" Barnes asked, leaning against the bathroom door. He had a toothbrush in his mouth.

She almost jumped, not noticing him there. She didn't even hear him, which annoyed her. "When are you leaving?" she asked, ignoring his insult. "Does Rogers know you are leaving?"

"Two weeks and no," he answered eyeing her. He took the toothbrush out of his mouth and held it in his hand

"Why didn't you tell him?" she asked, knowing this would upset the Shrimp. Rogers and Barnes were close, and it would hurt him to know that his friend was going to war and could possibly lose his life, while he couldn't do anything. There was also the fact that Barnes was keeping it from him.

"I'll tell him when I need to," he stated. He sounded annoyed.

"When's that? When you're leaving?" she asked, showing him her spunk. "You think that's better?"

Putting the brush down, Barnes straightened himself up and walked to her. "I know, but I can't tell him," he said as he ripped the papers out of her hands. "Just let it be." It was surprising that it didn't give her paper cuts.

She took a deep breath, knowing she should let this go. If she pushed, she might change history or make him mad. Maybe, Rogers wasn't supposed to know to a certain time. "Okay," she agreed. "But…" She shook her head. She needed to let this go. "Fine."

After putting the papers up, he stepped back to her. "How are you?" he asked. His voice was softer all of the sudden. "Are you in pain?" He stared at the cast before his eyes rested on her face.

Toni followed his eyes for a second, wondering if he was looking at her boobs. "I'm fine."

"I can see you're uncomfortable."

"Maybe, it's just you."

"Ouch," he mocked. "That hurt." He was smiling. "I thought we could be friends."

She narrowed her eyes at him. "Are you flirting with me, Mr. Barnes?" she teased with a wink. If he wanted to play the flirting game with her, she would, and she would have him crying mercy.

He smiled at her. "Why? Do you want me to? I can."

Barnes was smirking at her. Smirking at her! She was a Stark. How dare he smirk at a Stark like that? "Large ego, I see."

"Is there a problem with that?" Again, he was smirking.

If she didn't find that completely sexy, it would be totally annoying. She shook her head as she tried to clear her mind of the dirty images that flooded it. There were so many things that she could do to that man, and she wasn't sure if half of them were legal. "So why did you bring me back?" she asked, changing the subject. She didn't want to answer his question.

His smile faded slightly. "Neither I nor Steve were going to leave you down there," he admitted. "Something could've happened to you."

"No one would've blamed you," she said as she turned to the door. _Where are my shoes?_ "Where's Rogers?" If she timed this right, she might get away before he came back. Where she would go after that, she wasn't sure.

"Work," he answered. "Leaving so soon?"

She turned back to Barnes, who was leaning back against the counter. "I don't want to impose."

"Where would you go?"

There was another question she didn't want to answer, because she had no answer. "So you're going to let me go without a fuss?" That shocked her.

Barnes took a deep breath. "I'm not Steve." There was a half-smile. "If you want to go, then go. I won't stop you, but you don't have to."

Toni took a long look at him, trying to read him, but she couldn't get anything from him.

"You never answered my question. Where would you go? I know you don't have anywhere to go."

She shot him a glare. "Don't think that you know me, because you don't." She hated when people thought they knew her, because no one knew her. No one at all.

"I see."

"You see what?" she asked as she stepped away. She needed to calm herself.

"You don't like to accept help."

 _Calm down, Stark._ Once second, he had her hot and bothered, and the next, he had her pissed. _I need to get out._ She took a deep breathe. "Why does that matter?" she asked. Turning, she noticed a bag sitting on the table. She wondered for a second what was inside of it. Toni exhaled as she turned away.

"Steve and I both agreed you can stay with us until you get on your feet."

Toni gave him a questioning look, but she didn't say anything. She wanted to bring up the fact that he would be leaving in two weeks and he wouldn't be here to see her get back on her feet, but she thought that was a bad idea.

"What's with the look?" Barnes asked as he stepped toward her.

"Nothing." Toni eyed him. She held her breath as she watched his eyes drifted down to her chest. For a second, she thought he was looking at her boobs again, but he was looking at the spot where the reactor was located. "You're looking at my chest again and there's nothing to see. I'm not showing anything." Her shirt was hiding her chest.

Barnes turned slight red as he turned away. "I-I…wasn't looking. I thought I saw something."

"On my chest?" she asked. She hid her worry about him finding out about the reactor. He would probably think she was some kind of freak.

He shook his head. "I thought I saw something." Toni laughed as his face was red. "So will you stay? You don't have to stay if you don't want to, but accepting help isn't a bad thing."

"I'll stay if you stop asking and if you tell Rogers about your enlistment," she said, poking the beast.

"There you go again," he said annoyed.

"What? I think he would like to know so he can make the best out of these two weeks. He's your best friend."

"I know." He took a deep breath. "Fine. I will."

"YAY," she cheered, almost jumping.

Barnes stared at her, unsure what to make of her. "You have some energy. What do you use that for?" He winked at her, causing her to blush.

"You have a dirty mind on you, Mr. Barnes."

He laughed. "I have been told that."

She narrowed her eyes. "I see."

Barnes laughed again. "Do you want to take a walk with me?" he asked, changing the subject.

"I have nothing to wear," she stated, pointing to her outfit. She looked like some hippy chick in what she was wearing, and she wouldn't be caught dead wearing this outside. Even in the past, she was still a Stark and she still had standards. "Do you see what I'm wearing?" she asked.

"Go check that bag."

She turned to the bag that she spotted earlier and took a look inside. "What? Where did these come from?" she asked. There were a few different outfits in the bag for her, and to her dismay, there was no pants. There was one pot-a-dot dress, one grey dress, two blouses and one skirt. At the bottom of the bag, was a pair of black flats. _At lease, there're no heels._ She hated heels. "Where did these come from?"

"Steve thought you would need some clothes to change into."

"Rogers didn't have to do that," she said looking at the clothes. He really didn't have to do it, because now, she owed him.

Barnes waved it off. "That's who he is. He's a perfect gentleman, while I'm the bad guy." Again, he was smiling.

"I can see that," she chucked as she picked up the bag, knowing she couldn't turn it down. She would need to blend into the 1940's if she wanted to keep her secret. Plus, she would pay Rogers back, but if she really thought about it, didn't she already do that? He was living in her Stark Tower, which she had refused to call the Avenger Tower like everyone else had been. Until SHIELD started to pay the bill, Toni refused to call it anything but Stark Tower. "But you know. I like the bad guys." She showed him her winning smile.

"Who's flirting now?"

"Let's me get changed, and we can take a walk."

"If you need help, let me know. I would be glad to assist."

"Geez," Toni joked. "You're such a tease. Does your mother know you act like this?" She walked toward Rogers' room to change. The hospital bag with all of her things was in there, so she could just put them all together.

Barnes took a seat at the table and picked up the newspapers. "Nope, but what she doesn't know can't hurt her." Even though her back was to him, she knew he was smiling.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

She laid out all of the outfits on the bed, as she was unsure which one to put on. Each was too girly for him, but at least they had high neck lines, which would hide the fading reactor. "Let's go with the dresses, because it would be too much work with the skirt," she moaned. She hated dresses, and she knew the future Rogers would be having a kick out of this. He had told her once that he had always wanted to see her in a dress, as he had never seen her in a dress. He wasn't even sure she owned a dress. She did of course (thanks to Pepper), but they were hidden in her closet.

"And lets just go with the pot-a-dots," she said. That one had a zipper in the back, while the other dress had buttons going all the way up the front. She could handle the zipper while buttons would give her trouble. Though she stumbled a few times, she managed to get out of her clothes.

"What do they have me in?" she asked herself as she looked at the bra and panties she wore. The white bra didn't have any shape to it as it coved half of her chest. It also made her look flat chested. "Not like I had any boobs to begin with," she muttered to herself. The bra matched the ugly panties she was wearing, which almost looked like shorts. It went past her belly button. "I so need to get out of this."

She took them off with no issue, but again, it was torture to put anything on. Her black boy short panties were easy to put on, but that couldn't be said about her black bra, which was fighting her. "Stupid bra," she cursed. She was able to clip it in the front, but it was the rotating that she was having an issue with. As she struggled, she felt against the bed, making a lot of noise.

"Are you okay in there?" Barnes called from outside the door.

"I'm fine!" she yelled back, finally realizing how to rotate the bra. After a few minutes of struggling, she was able to get it on properly. "There, we go." She smiled as she looked in the mirror. "See, I look much better."

Though she wasn't a girly girl in any shape or form, she still tried to keep herself looking hot. She smiled, because even with a cast, she still looked good. The cast could not hide the fact that there was no fat on her body, but it couldn't hide the scars eithers. A one long one down her left side could be seen. Shaking her head, she turned back to the bed and picked up the dress she was going to wear. She set it on the ground and stepped into it. She was able to put it all the way up and slip her arms into it, but she couldn't zip it. She needed both arms for that. "I guess I could ask Barnes to zip it for me," she said as she looked in the mirror.

The dress had a high neck, which covered the reactor, but that didn't mean it was hidden. Toni was staring at her chest looking for any hints of the blue glow. "I can see it," she muttered. "Or maybe, I can see it because I know it's there. Yep, that's it," she announced. It really wasn't that noticeable and no one would notice it unless they were looking for it.

Stepping into the black flats, she crossed to the door. "Barnes, can you help me with this?" she asked as she opened the door.

He was still sitting at the table, reading the newspaper. He looked up at her and his mouth almost dropped, because she looked amazing in the dress. "…Help with what?"

She walked toward him. The short sleeve dress went a few inches below her knees, and it hugged her body. "Can you zip this for me?" She asked as she showed him her back.

"Sure," he said, a little shaky. He stood and walked to her. He put one of his hands on the back of her neck to hold the dress together, and he placed the other on her lower back.

Holding up her hair, Toni could feel his cold hand on her back and his hot breath on her neck. "All good?" she asked as she felt him go all the way up. He was getting her hot again. _Damn hormone,_ she thought to herself. _This is what happens when I don't have sex in months._ She really couldn't remember the last time she had sex, which was surprising for her. It was weird for her to have sex nowadays with the reactor in her chest.

"Yes," he stated as he walked away.

"Thanks. Let me do something with this hair and we can go." He nodded as he went back to the table.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni was back in front of the mirror, glaring at her hair. It was a total mess, and there wasn't thing that she could really do with so. "Maybe, I should cut it." She exhaled as she rubbed her temple. "Ew," she groaned as she noticed her wrist. There was dried blood crusted onto her wrist from when she tried to escape from the handcuff. She had forgotten that she had cut her wrist. "I should clean that, but first the hair."

She turned from the mirror looking around the room for something that she could use. On the window, she noted a rubber band, which she knew would rip out her hair, but she had no choice. Though she wanted to put it in a bun, she settled for a low pony tail, which wasn't all that neat. However, she was happy with her work and headed to the restroom. She noticed Barnes eyeing her, but he didn't say anything to her.

When she got to the restroom, she turned on the water and ran the water over her wrist. It stung on contact. After a little work, she was able to get the caked on blood off, but the cuts were visible. "Hopefully, no one notices," she prayed. She didn't want the questions that would come along with it. "At least it isn't as bad as my face," she smiled. Though her hair had hid most of the injury, there was a bit that was still showing. "At least the bruises are gone." She didn't have to hide them with make-up that she hated.

Putting on the biggest smile, she walked out to meet Barnes, who had agreed her with a big smile. It would have been fun to get to know him if you knew what she meant, but she couldn't do that.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni and Barnes had just taken a seat in a booth at a diner. "It looks like an old fifty dinner," she smiled as she took the coat she was wearing off. Barnes had offered to help her, but she had turned him down. She didn't need any help with the perfectly fitting coat that she had borrowed from Rogers.

"What would a fifty dinner look like?" he asked her. His eye brow was raised as he stared at her. "I think there would be aliens or something, right?" He laughed.

 _Idiot!_ She yelled at herself. "I meant…" What could she really say to that? _Oops, I meant thirties._ She didn't think that would work. She took her head as she exhaled slowly. "Mistake of the tongue. Not sure what I meant," she smiled. She tried to hide it with a laugh

Again, he was staring at her.

"So is this place any good?" she asked, trying to change the subject.

"You have a funny way of saying things."

She raised her eye brow and again, she cursed in her mind. She really didn't belong in this time period, and she would go crazy if she stayed here for too long. "Because I'm awesome."

"And you have a health ego," he replied as the waitress placed two glasses in front of them. "Give us a few minutes. We have a friend joining."

Toni had almost forgotten about Rogers joining them, and she was not looking forward for that. She couldn't even last a minute with him without an insult or a lecture. "He better hurry. I'm hungry," she chuckled.

"Where do you put it all?" he asked, looking her over. They had stopped to eat once before and she out ate him, which was very difficult. He could eat.

Toni simply smiled.

"And there's that face."

She narrowed her eyes at him. "What's with my face?" she asked. "I think my face is just fine! Thank you!" Her voice carried, making a few heads turn. Blood pooled in her cheeks as she felt eyes on her. Barnes laughed, making her turn away. She tried to calm down by distracting herself by the people on the streets. Just when she was about to turn back, she noticed someone on the corner. _He looks familiar._ She thought to herself.

"Are you okay?" Barnes asked, noticing that something was up with her.

She turned back to him. "I'm fine," she smiled. Taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes as she tried to remember where she saw that man from.

"Are you sure?" he asked, inching his hand closer to her.

"Crystal," she said, tensed. It came back at her like a ton of bricks. She remembered where she had seen him before: the hardware shop. Earlier Barnes and she had visited the shop, and she had thought that she was going crazy when she had spotted the same man outside looking at her. She had thought she was paranoid, but now, she knew she wasn't. "I'll be back. Have to use the little girl's room," she announced getting up. She didn't know why he was following her but she was going to find out.

The strange man turned and started to walk away.

"Okay," he smiled.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni didn't know how she had lost the man, when she had followed him down an alley way before she lost him. "Shit," she cursed. "Now, that bastard got me lost." She looked around, trembling from the cold. She had forgotten to pick up the coat as she bolted out the dinner. Even if she did, Barnes would've notice and she didn't want to explain why she was chasing after some stranger.

Folding her arms against her chest, she tried to warm herself as she trekked back to the dinner, or at lease she tried to. She had no idea of where she was. "Stupid Bastard," she muttered again, not caring about the weird looks she was getting. People probably thought she was crazy and she would agree with them. She never thought things through, which often got her in trouble.

As she turned a corner, she felt a pair of eyes on her and she turned quickly, looking for the eyes. "Where are you?" she asked. Her eyes scanned the crowd. "Wait," she breathed as she noticed a man shifted. She knew it might not be anything as anyone can shift, but his shifting was uncomfortable and it drew her eyes. It was unnatural. Not wanting him to know she was following, she turned slowly and eyed him until he was a few feet away. "You shouldn't do this, Stark," she told herself. It was very foolish to chase after someone when she had a broken arm, because it would be very easy for someone to overtake her. As he turned a corner, Toni picked up her speed, so she wouldn't lose him. When she finally turned the same corner, she noticed him was a few blocks around. "Shit," she cursed.

Just as she was about to run, someone placed her hand on her shoulder, almost sending her a few feet into the air. It made her want to punch the person in the face. No one touched her without permission. Toni turned to face the person, and to her surprised, Rogers was standing there. Much to her annoyance, she saw concern in his eyes. "Rogers."

"What are you doing out here without a coat? Why aren't you at the dinner with Bucky?" he asked. There was annoyance in his tone.

It pissed her off that he was mad at her. Why was he allowed to be angry at her for being out without a coat? She was a growth ass woman and she didn't need a parent. _Calm yourself,_ she told herself. She shouldn't be angry at him for getting in her way as he didn't know she was following someone, but it was hard, very hard. "I'm fine," she said harshly.

He started to fuss with his jacket. "Do you-"

Toni eyed him. _He's really a sweet heart, isn't he_? "No, I don't, but thank you." She put on a smile, trying to not snap. Someone had been watching her and she had a chance to get him.

"Toni, I-"

She waved him off, but she knew he wouldn't be happy without an explanation. "I'm fine. I…just thought I saw someone I knew so I bolted out of the dinner, but I was wrong. I guess my memory is still fuzzy," she lied.

"I see."

"Let's get back to Barnes. He's probably worried."

"I bet he is."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

When they got back to the diner, Barnes didn't say anything to Toni besides asking if she fell in. He didn't say anything about her disappearance during the whole meal, but she knew he was curious. He had been eyeing her the whole time, and it made Toni slightly uncomfortable, but she didn't say anything. She didn't want to talk about it in front of Rogers, and it was clear that Barnes didn't want to either.

"So how was your day, Bucky?" Rogers asked, after he had finished his meal. He was sitting next to Toni, who was picking at her food. She hadn't eaten much.

"I got everything that I needed done today," he answered as he pushed his plate away. "But I think Toni's day was better."

Toni looked up from her dish and narrowed her eyes at him.

"Why? What happened?" Rogers asked, looking at her.

"I got a job at Nick's Tools and Garden," she answered. When she had entered the hardware shop, she didn't think she would walk out with the job, but she didn't mind. It would give her access to the tools that she could use to fix her reactor (not that she thought it was possible) and the unnamed device if she ever got it back from her father.

"I tell you, Steve. This one's a genius," Barnes said.

Toni took a deep breath. "I don't know if I would call myself that." Yes, she would call herself that to anyone who would listen, but she didn't need James Barnes to tell her that. She knew already. She had countless IQ tests done on her since she was small. She had been putting mainframes together since she was four, but they didn't need to know that.

"I thought Nick was going to explode when you went calculated all that stuff in your head," Barnes stated. "It was unbelievable so see her calculate every person's in that buildings totals in her head."

Rogers looked at her. "Why did she do that?"

"Nick pissed me off and I wanted to proof that I could, so I did," Toni smiled.

"And after that, he offered me a job," Toni smiled.

"I never want to piss you off," Barnes said. "You bite."

"Bite hard," Toni added with a smile. She took a look at Barnes, who was still eyeing her. _Does he expect something?_ She wondered. She knew Rogers, Mr. Nice Guy, would never expect anything from a lady, but that could not be said about Barnes, who seemed to be already expecting something.

All of the sudden, she felt a pair of eyes on her again, and she turned toward the window. There he was again, staring at her.

* * *


	10. Last Resort

_Steve sat at Toni's hospital bed watching her chest move up and down every so slowly, which made his heart beat a little too fast. She had been in a coma for the last few days, and they had no clue of when or if she would wake up. The idea that she might not wake up scared the shit out of him. He didn't know how or when he fell for the rowdy brunette, but he fell hard for her. He didn't know what he would do if she didn't recover._

" _Toni," he begged, "please, wake up." His voice was weak. "I...I…" He wanted to tell her everything, but he couldn't tell her even if she was unconscious and unable to hear him. He didn't want her to reject him, because he wouldn't be able to take it. He couldn't believe she would want him over the handsome funny Barnes, who was missing from her bed side. He closed his eyes as he tried to rid himself of the negative thoughts he was thinking. Bucky was his best friend and he would not turn on him, especially not over a girl, but he should be here. How could he leave her alone? Did he not care?_

_His mind wandered back to how she had gotten hurt. "I failed to protect you," Steve stated, feeling ashamed of himself. He had promised himself when he first met her that he wouldn't let anything happen to her as he could tell even then that she was special, but he failed her and he felt sick. "I'm so sorry." His hid his face his hands as he tried to stop the tears. It was his fault that she was injured. He was too worried about protecting her than the mission at hand and she got hurt because he was distracted._

" _How long have you been here?" Steve asking, sensing someone at the door. His eyes were focused on the glow in her chest, which he just learned about._ Did she always have that? _He wondered._ What is the purpose of that?

_Bucky stepped into the room and looked at Toni. "A few minutes," he stated softly. His eyes were focused on the many wires connected to her. "Maybe, you should get some sleep."_

_Steve looked up at Bucky, as he tried to hold back his glare, which he was failing at. He had also blamed Bucky for this, even if it really wasn't his fault. He knew Toni wouldn't blame any of them as injures were common in warfare, and she had agreed to the risks when she went out with them. "I don't sleep much now," he replied bitterly. Ever since he had become a super soldier, many things had changed for him. He couldn't get drunk and he slept less, which was something he was getting used to. "And I'm not going to leave her."_

_Bucky took a deep breath. "You need to rest," he stated as he folded his arms across his chest._

" _I can't rest," he replied with a deep breath._

" _She wouldn't want you to worry like this."_

_Steve was really getting pissed at Bucky. "I'm not going to leave her like you did," he snapped as he stood up._

_Bucky took a step back, knowing he couldn't take a pissed off Captain America in a hand to hand fight. "I didn't want to leave her, but there were other lives in danger, who needed me. And besides, she told me to, well more like yelled at me. She's scary when she wants to be." He shook his head. "Why don't you go see Peggy? I know she wants to see you. I can sit with Toni," he offered._

_If it was possible, Buck's offer made him angrier. "Why would I leave her with you?" he asked._

_He gave Steve a weird look. "You do know that Toni and I-" he started._

_Again, Bucky was pissing him off. It wasn't anything official and they were only flirting, which annoyed Steve. He saw her first; plus, Bucky didn't even like her at the beginning. "Then where were you the last few days?" he asked. "You left her again! She was here by herself." When Steve arrived at her hospital bed, she was alone._

" _There were other things that I had to do first." He paused as he thought about something. "And aren't you with Peggy or something?" he asked._

" _No!..." There was a pause as he shook his head. "No, I am not..." Yes, there was a part of him that wanted to be with Peggy as she was respectful, beautiful and smart. She was the perfect woman, and she was the woman that everyone thought he would end up with. Toni on the other hand wasn't perfect or the ideal woman that people pictured with him. Yes, she was smart, too smart by society's standards for a perfect wife, and beautiful, but she wasn't respectful at all. She acted like a man at times and spoke her mind, even when she wasn't ask. There were people who didn't like it; however, he liked that about her. Yes, she annoyed him so badly, but she also drew him in. He wanted her, even if she would never want him. "We're just friends." However, there was still a part of him that wanted Peggy, and he couldn't forget that._

" _That sounds reinsuring."_

_He looked as Bucky, wondering what made him so special in Toni's eyes. Was it his recklessness? Was it his experience (something that he didn't have)? Was it his jokes? What was it? "Why are you here?" he asked, as he tried to calm himself._

" _I came to see her," Bucky stated as he walked pass Steve and to the bed._

_Taking a deep breath, Steve eyed Bucky as he took a seat next to her. Bucky reached his hands toward hers, but their hands never touched. He had never seen Bucky like that with anyone and that shocked him. "Why do you even care?" he asked. His voice was soft._

_Bucky looked up before looking back at the glow in her chest. "She's special."_

" _I know." Steve watched her chest move up and down. "And I wouldn't call flirting a relationship," he added._

_Bucky laughed. "That's a late response. And we might be something more soon." He smiled weakly._

" _You have-" Steve never finished his sentence as alarms started to go off, shocking them both. For a second no one did anything as they didn't know what was going now. Seconds later, something clicked in Bucky's head and he bolted out of the room. However, Steve still couldn't think straight as he watched her struggle. "Toni," he uttered as he eyed the monitors connected to her. Her heart was beating way too fast, and he didn't know what to do, but it didn't take long for someone who did to come rushing in. Bucky followed in right behind the doctor._

" _Move out of the way," the Doctor yelled as he pushed Steve out of the way. When he got to her, he lowered the bed, and it was in that instance that her heat stopped which took Steve's heart with it. "She's flat lining. I'm losing her," the doctor yelled to the nurses that Steve didn't notice come in._

_***_

Steve popped straight up, soak in sweat. He had that same nightmare many times before and it always felt real to him, but he wasn't sure if it was. There were so many past memories in his mind and it was hard to tell which was real or which was not. He hoped to hell that that memory wasn't real, because if something were to happen to her, he would die. "Maybe, Banner's right," he muttered to himself as he sat up on the couch, which he didn't remember falling asleep on. He had to give it to Toni, as she knew how to pick the most comfortable couches to sleep on. He hadn't been able to really sleep since Toni had disappeared, and he wasn't the only one.

When Banner had brought up the idea of time travel, Steve shot it down, saying it was downright crazy; however, it had merit. His memories from the 1940's, which he wasn't all too sure about, had Toni in them. Steve shook his head. It was those fuzzy memories that made him fall in love with her, even if the present day Toni was an asshole. If it wasn't for the same glow in memory Toni's chest, he would think they were different people. Shaking his head, he tried to get her out if his mind. Thinking about her only made him feel worse.

His tried to think of the other avengers as he tried to clear from his mind. Banner had basically locked himself in one of the many labs in Stark's Tower (Steve knew it annoyed Toni when they refer to it as the Avenger's Tower). Romanoff and Barton were off trying to trace those devices that were stolen from Black Hawk as they could have something to do with Toni's disappearance. Director Fury had some of his SHIELD Scientist and agents looking for some way to get Toni back. Each of them were coming up with nothing.

Steve took a deep breath as he made his way down to the lab that Banner had locked himself in. He should have told Banner the truth when he brought up the time travel idea, instead of keeping it to himself. It was important. He knew he was going to get a lecture when he told Bruce. How could he be that stupid and not tell him about the memories? Shaking his head, he took a deep breath as he arrived at the doors to the lab. The doors were, like Stark's own personal lab, made out of glass; however, they weren't given a horrible paint job. He entered without having to enter a code as no code was required.

Banner was hard at work, trying to recreate the device that Toni made. He had her blue prints, which could've been in another language for all Steve knew, in front of him. "Yes, Steve?" Banner asked.

He took a look the Doctor, who had not looked back. Banner's eyes were focused on the failed object in front of him. "How's that going?" Steve asked, not wanting to admit the truth. He usually didn't do stupid shit as he left the stupid shit to the other avengers.

Banner put down the tools and turned to him. "What's going on, Steve?" he asked.

"I know where Stark is," he revealed as he took a seat in one of the many chairs. To his surprise, the chair was very uncomfortable, and he almost forgot what he was going to say.

"What are you talking about?" Banner asked as he stared hard at Steve.

"I know which time period she is in," Steve answered, explaining everything that he knew, which wasn't all that much. As he watched Banner's face change, he became worried that he would have to fight the Hulk. That was one fight he didn't know if he would win.

"What the hell were you thinking, Steve?" he yelled. "We could have used that information."

"Banner, calm down."

"Afraid of the big guy?" he asked. There was a hint of laugher in his anger that Steve wasn't expecting.

Steve stood up as he didn't want to be sitting if Banner were to attack. He didn't blame the doctor for his anger management skills, because he knew it was hard for him to control the beast. Plus, he had a right to be angry. "I didn't know what I was thinking, but…" He paused so he could breathe and think for a second. "I didn't know what to make of the memories. I had two sets of memories and I don't know what were real. And they are always changing and disappearing." He exhaled slowly as the memory of Toni in a hospital bed filled his mind. "I'm sorry."

The doctor eyed him and Steve wondered what was going through Banner's head. He didn't say anything for a few minutes as if he was trying to think of what to say. Banner took a deep breath. "I bet," he stated. His tone was soft, which surprised Steve. "It's me who should be sorry." He paused. "Time travel is such a tricky thing and there's no telling what she's doing and how she's changing the timeline. I can't even begin to understand what that feels like to have everything change on you."

Sitting back down, Steve took a deep breath again. "I should've told you."

"It isn't a big deal which time period she is in, if I can't get this thing to work," he said as he crossed back to the device, that couldn't hold power at all.

"If this doesn't work? What else is there?" Steve asked. He closed his eyes as he tried to recall a memory of Toni. He couldn't remember anything past that one. He didn't even know if the memory doctor had brought her back. Would any of this be worth it?

"What's going on in your head?" Banner asked as he noticed that he was losing Steve's attention.

"The last thing I remember about S-Toni from that time is her flat-lining. I don't know…." He drifted off as he couldn't finish his sentence.

Banner's face fell as he couldn't take the idea of her dying either. She was his closest friend, and he didn't know what he would do if he lost that. "We'll get her back."

It took Steve a few seconds to respond. "Yes, we will." He smiled slightly as he recalled how stubborn she was. She would be back even if it killed her…he hoped to God it didn't.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Directory Fury was still pissed, but there was hardly a time that he wasn't pissed. However, he hadn't calmed down since he had learned that someone had stolen from SHIELD, _from him_. No one stole from him and got away from it. To make matters worse, someone was using those items to mess with his team, and no one messed with his team but him. Though Stark annoyed the hell out of him, he wouldn't let anything happen to her, unless she deserved it. He doubted that it would ever come to that, but again, he had to play it safe.

"So did you speak to Thor?"

Fury, who was staring intensely out of the room, turned to see Agent Hill walk into the room. She wasn't his biggest fan, but she respected him, which was all that he needed. "I had, but there wasn't much he could do himself. He had no idea of how portals work, even though he uses one to get here." He took a deep breath. "I didn't think there was anything he could do in the first place."

Maria Hill looked at him sideways. "Then why did you ask?"

He turned back to the window and stared out into the endless sky. "Loki."

That startled her. "You think he can help?"

Loki had been locked up tight since he had tried to destroy New York City. "There's a chance he can help, or if not, there is also a chance he knows who did this." He knew the likelihood that Loki would help them was low and that he would want something in return if he did, but Fury had to do something.

"And you think that's a good idea?" she asked. There was no anger in her voice, but he knew she was pissed that he was trying to get help from Loki, who had almost destroyed New York.

"It's only a matter of time before something or someone that's stronger than Loki comes along. When that does, we'll need all of the Avengers." Fury took a deep breath. "It's for the best."

"All due respect, Sir, but horrible things had been done because someone thought it was for the best."

He turned to her and studied her. If Stark's disappearance (he wasn't too sure about the whole time-traveling idea) and the break in at Black Hawk wasn't related, it would be quite a coincidence, and he didn't believe in coincidences. "What do you suggest I do, Agent Hill?" he asked.

"Do you think Loki is behind this?" she asked, not answering his question.

Fury did not call her out on it. "Anything is possible, but I do not think so."

"You aren't sure and _yet_ , you're going to have Thor bring him here?" she asked.

"No, I do not have any plans on bringing him back to Earth," Fury answered. He wasn't sure there was any cell on this planet that could hold that man, and he wasn't going to take that chance, not for Stark.

"Then how?" she asked, clearly confused.

Fury crossed to his desk and stared at the papers on it. "Loki has the ability of illusions, and he has a vast knowledge of portals that no one else has."

She narrowed her eyes at him. "I know."

He looked back toward her. "With Thor's help, he should be able to transport an illusion to Stark using the Bifrost." He could tell she wasn't too sure of the plan.

"What good would that do?" Agent Hill asked.

Fury looked at her, trying to read what she was thinking. "It'll allow us to get some idea of where she is and how we can get her back. We might need her brain for that."

"Okay. And wouldn't Thor be taken a big risk by doing that? He would have to let his brother out."

She had a lot of questions. He didn't like questions. "Thor is looking at this as a chance of redemption for his brother." He took a pause to breathe. "He does, however, understand that this is a risk."

"You're willing to let them risk their home?"

Fury didn't feel guilty about that. Sure, he wanted nothing to become of their world, but he wasn't going to let anything happen to theirs. "Yes."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

It had taken a few minutes for Bruce to talk Steve down from his mood and get him out of the lab so he could work. It was hard to do anything with Steve around, which annoyed them both. He knew Steve was feeling useless right as there was nothing he could be doing. Steve wasn't stupid by any means, but he wasn't genius. He didn't understand anything about what Toni was building. Toni and Bruce could have whole conversions in front of Steve with him not having a clue to what they were saying. Toni thought it was funny, though Bruce didn't think so. He took a deep breath as he thought about her. He could keep himself busy, trying to recreate the device, but Steve could not. Steve was good, no great, in the field, calling out strategies; however, in the lab, he was not. They both knew it.

However, with this new information about Steve's memory, there was something that he could do. Bruce had sent him out to draw and/or write everything that he could remember of those memories. If they could get a better idea of what was happening to Toni, there was a better shot that they could get her back.

Bruce turned back to the device, which hated him. He didn't usually projected emotions on objects like Toni did, but he was willing to make an exception for this. This device hated him. He didn't know how Toni was even able to get it to hold power for a second. Jarvis had showed him a few clips of Toni working on it, but it could only help so much. The two devices may look the same but he couldn't get his to work. He looked at the picture. "Even if we could get it working, we would need a lot of power." He looked at the blue prints, trying to look for any clue how she did it. "How did she power this?" he asked.

"Miss Stark has connected the device to an Arc reactor," Jarvis answered. "However, the device drained the reactor and fried all of the circuits, making it impossible to repair."

That startled Bruce. "She connected it to the reactor in her chest?" he asked. He didn't think she would take a stupid risk like that.

"No, she did not but there is no telling what happened to the reactor in her chest, Sir. She did take precautions, but I am afraid that it was not enough."

That frightened Bruce. He knew Toni had programmed Jarvis to have some emotion, but Bruce had not witness them so strongly before now. "What are the chances her reactor survives that?" he asked, looking over the blue prints again.

"The failure rate is calculated at 85.2%."

That was way too high for Bruce's liking, and he closed his eyes as he remembered what Steve had told him. Steve had seen her flat lining, which he was glad that didn't have. "It would be fried much like the reactor upstairs?" he asked.

"I cannot say for certain. She did take precautions, which could have protected it from being permanently damaged."

"How long can she survive without the reactor?"

"Only a few minutes, Sir."

"But she doesn't need an arc reactor, right? I remember her once telling me she was once hooked up to a car battery." Bruce took a seat as he tried to figure out if there was a way he could save her.

"That is correct. And if needed, it can be done again."

"She's resourceful. She'll probably figure it out on her own." He reached for the unfinished, nonworking device. "So if we are able to get enough power to this, we should be able to travel back to Toni."

"Yes, it is possible."

Bruce reached to one of the touch screens monitors and started a few calculations. He needed to how much power this device needed to run.

"Can I suggest to you the same thing that you suggested to Captain Rogers?"

Bruce took a deep breath and looked up as he didn't know where to look. "I don't need rest," he lied. He knew he needed rest just as bad as Steve did. "But Steve isn't resting either."

"Sir,-"

"I know, I know." Bruce stated as he waved him off. He knew he needed to rest, and it would only hurt Toni in the end. She needed him at his best and this was not his best. Closing his eyes, he knew he was tired and his mental functions weren't slipping. "I'll go rest."

"Thank you, Sir."

* * *


	11. The fear of the Tail

If one more man slapped her ass, Toni was going to rip off his arm, slap him with it, and then shove it up his ass. She didn't care that she had a broken arm, which was feeling better with each passing day, or that she only weighed 100 pounds, she was going to beat each one of those assholes, who touched her ass. She didn't care that she was sex on legs as they had no right to touch her without her permission, and believe her, none of them had her permission.

Toni put back the hammer that some asshole had changed his mind about when he was checking out. He had given her his best smile that he could muster and asked her in the most annoying manly voice he could if she wanted to go out with him. She politely told him no, but that didn't work as this was the third time that he had done that. He had come in every day for the last few days and done the same thing, which was really infuriating. She had told Nick about it, but he just waved it off as nothing. He was happy about the increase in sales that Toni brought it and didn't want to start a fight with anyone by addressing it.

"All men are assholes," she muttered as she took a seat behind the front desk. When she got the cast off, Nick had agreed to let her do more tasks, but for now, he had her seated behind the counter to ring people out. It made her the first person people see when they walked by, which annoyed the hell out of her. Since they were located a couple of blocks down from a few bars, a lot of drunken man walked by, and nine out of ten times, they would come in just to bug her. She didn't know what it was or what gave them the idea that it was okay to sexually harass her, but it really needed to stop. It was making her go crazy, and if she didn't need this job, she would pick up the hammer that she had just put back and bang their faces in with it.

With a big greedy smile, Nick walked out from his office and handled Toni an envelope. "Here's your money for the week," he said with a smile.

Toni thanked him before taking the cash filled envelope. Considering this was the 1940's, it wasn't a large amount, but Toni was okay with anything. Plus, she was glad that he was willing to pay her under the table, because there wasn't any other way. Even if she knew what her SSN, it wouldn't be good in this time. "Thanks," she said as she pocketed the cash in her grey dress.

"I'll lock up tonight," he said as he walked past her.

That was fine with her, because she didn't want to be here any longer than she needed to be. "K," she replied as she crossed to the coat hanger for Rogers' coat. She had promised herself that she would buy herself a coat as soon as she got enough money, because she didn't want to keep borrowing Rogers' coat. Maybe, she could do that now, because she didn't want to keep relying on him. After putting on his coat, she reached down for her bag, which held a few tools that Nick had let her take. He had asked why she needed them, but she told him it was for a project. "I'll be back tomorrow."

He looked up from the cash he was counting. "You can take tomorrow off."

"Are you sure?" she asked. It really didn't matter to her as it gave her time to scope out Stark Industries. If she wanted to get her device back, she would need to know everything about the company, a company that she would ran and sign over in the future.

"Yes," he said without giving any explanation. "And I'm sorry about the asshole earlier. I'll talk to him about it."

"Thanks," Toni stated, not expecting Nick to do that. She exited the shop with a smile on her face. Walking outside, she took a look around just to make sure she wasn't being followed. She hadn't seen her stalker, the guy who had been tailing her since the diner, in the last few days and that had her worried. Did he already have what he wanted? Did she scare him off? Or worse, was he still watching her and she not know it? That freaked her every time she thought about it and she hated that feeling.

It was already dark out, like it always was when she got off work. She hated that. Right now, she really missed Happy as he would never allow her to walk alone in the dark. At first, she loathed how protective he was, but now, she missed it. She also missed her Iron Man Suit. O' God, she missed the suit, as she didn't remember how she lasted without it.

Shaking her head, she started her long walk to the apartment, and she almost jumped five feet in the air when she noticed someone leaning against a building. She couldn't see his face as it was covered in shadows and Toni readied herself to reach in her bag for the hammer in case she needed to bang someone's face in. "Who's there?" she asked, trying to hide her nerviness.

The man stepped into the light with his hands in the air, revealing who he was. "Relax," Barnes stated as he smiled at her. "It's just me."

Toni shook her head, feeling like an idiot. Why was she acting like his? She wasn't normally like this. "I just-"

Barnes interrupted her. "Thought I was someone else?" he finished. "So who were you expecting?" he asked, eyeing the hammer's handle (the only part he could see).

"I thought you…were…someone…else." She said slowly. She didn't want to admit that she was afraid and that someone was stalking her.

"You know you can tell me the truth, right?" he asked as he looked around. "If someone's bothering you, you can tell me." Barnes had protective look in his eyes that Toni didn't understand. "I can take care of him for you."

"You didn't even like me at first, so why are you Mr. Protector now?" she asked. "What changed?" She didn't understand what was going on, and that annoyed her.

"I was mistaken about you at first," he replied with a sexy smile and wink. "But you can tell me if someone's bugging you."

Toni took a deep breath. "Why do you think someone's bothering me?" She didn't think she was that freaken readable, which also irritated her. That was the last thing she wanted. She fought the urge to look around, as she was felt eyes on her again. Maybe, she was just imagining it.

"I can see how uncomfortable you are, and I've noticed how jittery you get when you go out by yourself."

Toni really didn't want to talk about this anymore and started the walk to the apartment again. Taking a deep breath, she tried to calm herself. She was grateful to Barnes for coming to walk her home, but she didn't want him to know that.

Getting over the shook of Toni just walking away from him, it took Barnes a few seconds for him to catch up to her. "Geez, slow down," he stated, giving her a smile again. "You don't have to be so scared."

She stopped suddenly and turned to him. "I, Toni Stark, do not get scared," she snapped rapidly. It took her a few seconds to realize what she had just said. Maybe, he won't notice, she prayed to herself, but she wasn't that lucky.

He looked at her. "Did you just say Stark? As in Stark Industries?"

Toni could see the shock in his eyes. "No, no," she denied, unsure of what to really say. "Did I say Stark?" she asked. "I meant Sark." She tried to laugh it off.

"Sark?" Barnes looked at her as if he didn't believe her. "That makes sense. If you were really a Stark, why would you be staying with two random guys at a rundown apartment?"

"I wouldn't say rundown," she replied. It had a homely feeling that she wished she had at her place. She took her deep breath as she continued her walk.

She was a fast walker and Barnes had to run to catch up with her. "So, you remember now?" he asked.

Trying not to look at him, she stared at the sidewalk in front of her. The bag was starting to get heavy and it made it awkward to walk. "It's coming back slowly." She was annoyed at herself for that lie. It was stupid and it was hard to believe anyone fell for it. Out of the corner of her eyes, she eyed him. "It's…weird."

Barnes took a deep breath. "You know I'm not falling for that memory loss, right?" he asked.

Toni cracked a small smile as she glowered at the ground. "I knew it was stupid." She was beginning to worried, because she would have nowhere to go if Barnes didn't let her stay with him and Rogers. "What gave it away?"

"You know you can't keep everything in, right? You have to let it out or you're going to explode." He didn't answer her question.

She shook her head as she expected him to be mad. "Not in my family," she muttered as she picked up her speed to get away from him. She needed to figure out what she was going to do.

Barnes reached toward her. "You can't do this. You need to let people in. You need to talk to people, especially when you think someone's after you." He shook his head and reached out toward her.

Toni glared at him as she saw him reached for her. It took her a few seconds to figure out that he was going after her bag, which annoyed her as well. She didn't need him to carry her bag, but she didn't fight him when he took it from her. "I can take care of myself."

"Never said you couldn't."

Shaking her head, she continued her walk slowly. It would do no good in trying to get away from him, because he wasn't going to let her. "It's just a guy from work who doesn't understand the word no," she lied. She knew someone was watching her and it was more than a guy in love. She just had to figure out who it was and why he was following her. Did it have to do with Colonel Salty? She hoped so. At least, she would know he was a good guy…though she wondered if that would be a good thing.

"I can show him my fists if that helps," he stated as he smiled at her.

He was showing his teeth with that smile, and she had to give it to him; he had a sexy smile. She had already thought that, but now, she was sucked in with it. "So why did you let Rogers believe that I lost my memory?" she asked. He had gotten her curious.

"You didn't want to talk about it and I can see that. I don't know what it is, but I know it can't be good." Barnes took a deep breath. "And I know Steve. He wouldn't have dropped it if you didn't tell him something." He ran his hand through his hair. "He can be so annoying sometimes. Sometimes, I just want to…" He drifted off.

Though Rogers pissed her the hell off, it irritated her to hear his best friend say that, but she didn't say anything. She didn't want to start with a fight with a man, who if she thought about it, she didn't really trust. She didn't care if he was a sex god. As she looked him over from head to toe, she cursed her body's desire to jump him. WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME? She knew she couldn't have him, which made him so much more desirable. She always had a thing for men she couldn't have. Shaking her head, she knew it was stupid to fall for a guy who was going to die. That just screamed commitment issues, didn't it?

In about ten minutes, they arrived outside of the apartment. "You need to tell him, Barnes" she said, trying to change the subject. Toni didn't want to talk about her anymore.

He looked at her weird, hearing his last name out of her month. "He doesn't need to know," he stated as he unlocked the front door to the apartment.

As he opened the door for her, she narrowed her eyes at him. "You're leaving in three days. I think he would notice you disappearing."

"I know."

She shook her head as she entered the building. "You better tell him." She wanted to say 'or else I would', but she didn't want to pull that card. Plus, it wasn't her job to do so. It was someone else's because she wasn't supposed to be here in the first place.

"I will tomorrow."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

The next morning, Toni had no inkling of why she thought it would be a good idea to make breakfast for the guys when she had a broken arm, an arm that she was glaring at in the hopes that it would get better by magic. She burnt the bacon, which she could deal with as crispy bacon was the best; however, the eggs were a different story. Toni had completely burn them, which irritated her. She picked up the pan from the stove, which took her awhile to figure how to turn on (she didn't think it was a stove to begin with) and threw the pan in the trash. She had burnt the pan beyond repair in her eyes. "I'll buy them a new one," she muttered to herself. Every cent was important, but she didn't like to be in anyone's debt. She didn't want to owe anyone anything.

"So I guess, they're just getting bacon," she said to herself as she plated the meat. Shaking her head, she turned to the sink and turned the water on.

"I don't think you should get your cast wet."

Toni turned to see Rogers who had a curious look in his eyes. She wasn't sure how long he was standing there, watching her with that look. The shrimp Rogers was much quieter in his movements than the giant Captain Rogers. He had been able to sneak up on her a few times already, which irritated her. Shaking her head, she took a deep breath as everything he did seemed to annoy her. She knew he was trying his best to get her to like him, and if she didn't know the future Rogers, she would like him, but she can't get the future asshole out of her mind. However, if he knew her, he wouldn't care if she liked him. He wasn't the only asshole; she was one too but bigger. "It's fine," she stated as she waved him off.

She turned back to Rogers and reached into the sink. "Fuck," she cursed as she made the water too hot.

"For a dame, you have a mouth," Rogers said as he walked over to her. As he took the pan from her, he didn't notice the glare she was giving him.

She stepped away rather than fight with him, because it wasn't worth it. "Why thank you," she said instead. "I enjoy my mouth. Guys do as well." Toni intended for that to be dirty.

"Um…" Rogers looked up from the dishes and stared at her with large eyes and rosy cheeks. He didn't know what to say to that and that did make Toni laugh. He was innocent as ever. He turned away from her a few seconds later as he couldn't face her with his deep cherry red face. "Burnt the eggs?" he asked, changing the subject.

Letting him do so, she smiled at him. "I should just stay out of the kitchen, right?"

"Or until your arm gets better."

His back was toward her and she could see how stressed he was. "So where's Barnes?" she asked. Though she never saw him leave, she knew he wasn't here. She would've seen him by now.

He glanced toward her as he washed the dishes. It didn't seem like he had any interest in eating the bacon, which was okay with her. She could eat it all herself. "He left early."

Toni sighed as that meant he still didn't tell Rogers that he was leaving yet. She didn't want to be involved in that conversation or be around when that happened. "Any idea of when he'll be back?" she asked. Maybe, if she timed it right, she could be gone when that happened.

Rogers turned and Toni's breath got stuck in her throat. His right eye was black and blue. How didn't she notice it before? "I don't know. Nowadays, I don't know what he's up to." He smiled weakly at her.

"What happened to you?" Toni asked worried. She was ready to beat the asshole that attacked Rogers. No one was allowed to mess with him but her.

Not answering her, he stepped away from the sink to the pan she threw away. He eyed it curiously but he didn't say anything.

Toni rushed to the freezer for some ice. "Let's put something on that," she said. To her luck, there was an old fashion ice pouch, which was probably a sign that Rogers got hurt a lot. She didn't understand why he did that. What was the point in fighting if he was going to lose? "Go sit down," she ordered, as she tried to project Pepper.

Rogers turned to her and he could see the worry in her eyes. "I'm fine," he replied. "My eye will heal on its own." He eyed her as she walked toward him. "This isn't the first time I got a black eye."

Switching the ice bag to her broken left hand, she felt him flinch as she grabbed his hand. Ignoring that and his rapid heartbeat (which she could feel through her grasp), she pulled him to the couch and sat him down. She wasn't going to hold it against him, as he was innocent and naive unlike her; he wasn't comfortable around women. After she had him sitting, she pressed the cold compact to his face. She felt him jump at her touch but he didn't pull away. Though he couldn't really look at her with the pouch on his face, she felt his eyes on her.

After a few seconds, Rogers closed his eyes in awkwardness. He sat straight back against the couch as she sat on her knees at his side. Her body was inches from him. "How did you get this?" she asked.

He took a deep breath. "There was this guy who was mouthing off. I told him to shut it and he didn't like that."

Toni shook her head. "Why do you get into fights you can't win?" she asked. The future Rogers popped into her mind. It had appeared that nothing had changed, well beside the fact that he could win fights in the future. She felt him sigh in annoyance. She knew he must've been asked this question a lot and that he had been in a few fights with Bucky over it. He tried to pull away from her, but Toni wouldn't let him. She dropped the bag and held him. They both knew he wasn't going to fight her. "You had asked me to talk. Why can't I ask you to talk?" she asked.

Rogers looked down at the ice in his lap. "I do it because it's right." He turned to look her in the eyes. "I do this because it isn't right for me to do nothing. I have a part to play in this world and I'm going to play it." He had light smile on his face.

She knew what he was feeling. "Is there a point where you're going to give up?" she asked. She knew he had already tried to enlist a few times, but each time, he was turned down. "The odds are against you."

He shook his head. "You wouldn't understand," he said as he pulled her away from her slowly. Her hand moved to his leg, which stopped him from pulling away.

"You would be amazed at what I understand," she explained as she picked up the ice bag and placed it against his eye. "I understand what it means to have everyone doubt you and to have the odds against you. My ego keeps me going, but I think you have something better, more important, keeping you going." She smiled at him. "And I don't think you should give up. I think you're made for something special." She could say that because she knew the truth; however, even if she didn't, she could see it in him. But should you be saying that to him? She asked herself.

Rogers looked at her with a smile. "You're something."

"Why thank you," she smiled, still holding the ice against his face. "But you need to be smart about it."

"I know."

This was the Rogers she could handle. Why couldn't the future one be this sweet and soft instead of the righteous asshole, who yelled at her for everything?

Rogers reached up to take pack from Toni. "I got this," he stated.

Toni took a deep breath and let him take it. She did her best to ignore the feeling of his hand on hers. Once she was sure he had it, she let it go and hopped off the couch. It was then that she realized how close she was to him. Turning away from him, she hid her face as she didn't want him to see her red face. She didn't want Steve Roger to know that he did this to her. "I got the kitchen," she stated, changing the subject.

"But your cast," Rogers protested.

"I made the mess. I can clean it," she said. When she was sure her red cheeks were gone, she turned to him with a smile. Her arm was feeling better and though she was overshooting, she could be getting it off in a few weeks. "You worry too much," she smiled as she waved the cast.

Rogers stood up and walked to her. "I got this too," he stated as he took the pan from her and put the ice pack down.

"Men," she spouted as she walked away. She didn't see his smile but she knew he was smiling. This was the first conversation that they had together since the diner. Though she wouldn't admit it, she had been avoiding him as she was waiting for him to yell at her. Taking a deep breath, she took a seat on the couch. The tools that she had brought were hidden in a bag under the table, which the guys hadn't noticed yet.

"Geez," he whined, with a hint of laugher. "I feel insulted."

Toni turned toward Rogers, who was wearing a large smile. That smiled warmed her up, unlike what Barnes' smile did to her. Barnes made her feel hot, while Rogers made her feel safe, even if he couldn't really protect her at this time. She loved that feeling, but she didn't want to admit that. Shaking her head, she turned to the table. I wanted to avoid this, she thought to herself. She didn't want to get close enough to him to make an impression.

"Since you don't work today, do you-" Rogers started but the door silenced him. In came Barnes with a smile on his face. Over his shoulder, he held a bag, which held some clothes. "Hey, Bucky."

Toni shifted on the couch so she could look at Barnes. She could see the tension in his shoulders and she knew he was going to tell Rogers the truth. She did not want to be here for that. "Hey, Barnes," she stated as she stood up. "Where have you been?" she asked.

He gave her his signature smile. "Off putting my affairs in order." He had a way about him, which could calm anyone.

"Why would you be doing that?" Rogers asked. "Is something going on?"

That was her clue to go. "I'm going for a walk," Toni stated loudly as she walked to the closest. She grabbed Roger's coat and put it on. Barnes eyed her the whole time, knowing why she was leaving. She didn't want to be here for the argument that was about to happen.

"Toni," Rogers called. She was at the door before he called her name. "Toni." Again, he had a special way of saying her name that drove her crazy. "Where are you going? What's going now?"

"Just be careful," Barnes said to her. He took few feet toward Rogers, blocking Rogers' view of her. For that, she was grateful as she didn't want to see his face. She knew that Rogers knew that something was wrong. "We need to talk, Steve."

With that, Toni was out the door. She could hear yelling the second she reached the stairs and she was glad she wasn't there. Though she yelled and fought a lot, she hated it. Growing up that was all she heard from her parents.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Finding Stark Industries was easier than Toni first thought. She didn't know why she thought it be so hard, considering how big her father was at this time. She couldn't go down the street without hearing his name. His building, not as impressive as her tower, was huge and could be seen from a few miles away. The Stark logo wasn't as big as she thought it could be, but it drew enough attention from the people around. The color of the building was dreadful though, but she doubted that her father really cared what the color of his building was.

Toni took a seat across the street as not to draw attention. If her father did have the device, he would know she would be coming for it and would have his security team keep an eye out for her. Again, Peggy could be lying and this could be a trap, but she had no choice. She needed that device or she would be stuck here….

Her mind drifted to what she would do if she was stuck in the past. She couldn't work in that hardware store forever or she would go crazy, but what else could she do? She could try to get a job at Stark Industries and outsmart her father at every turn just to piss him off, but that wouldn't be a good idea. Plus, she couldn't really stand him and she didn't want to see him every day. If she did, the cops would probably be called daily.

Closing her eyes, she cleared her mind and focused on the task at hand. She needed to study Stark Industries for a way in. There were high fences around the complex and security guards that walked up and down the fence every few seconds. Though she couldn't tell from here, she knew there had to be cameras, so even if the guards missed something, the guys monitoring the cameras would not. There was only one way into the lot, and that was through a single check point. Each employee was required to have their badge before entering, and if the guards wanted to, they were able to search the vehicle without cause. They seemed to search them all though, but she spotted the one time the car was not. The guy who drove in must've been trusted.

The first thing first was getting her arm back, which she hoped would be in a few weeks. She was pushing it, but she couldn't help it. She really couldn't stand the cast and she wanted to take a saw to it, but she knew better. Toni took a big breath as she knew she couldn't wait for her arm, so the first thing really was to study the security for holes. That would take a few long days of watching, but she had to do that. After she figured that out, she would need to get her hand on a badge. "I could tail an employee and swipe his card," she thought to herself. "However, he could notice it's gone and report it's missing. A stolen badge would get me caught."

She rubbed her temple. She would need to copy the badge, but that would be difficult. It all depended on type of security system that her father had. "Fuck," she muttered. A card cloner wasn't a problem as she could build a machine to hack her father's system. She had done it before. However, she didn't have the materials to build it. Yes, the hardware store gave her access to tools but she would need some computers parts, which was all but impossible to get in this decade.

Toni reached in her pocket and pulled out her broken smart phone, which wasn't totally beyond repair, but again, she didn't have the materials she need. She might be able to rework the parts. "I can do that when I get back to the apartment," she stated, hoping that Barnes and Rogers hadn't kill each other. Shaking her head to clear her thoughts, she stood up. She had so much planning that she needed to do. "Maybe, I should try and randomly get caught." Though she would have to tell them the truth (and risk the possibility of being put in a nut house), it might be the only way she could get her device back.

As she turned to leave, she noticed her stalker again, and this time he was smiling and waving at her. How dare he smile at her like that!? "He's a horrible tail," she muttered as she started to walk after him. Maybe, she could get him in a trap. "Though the question is why he's so horrible?" she asked herself. Tails weren't supposed to be noticed, and if Colonel Salty had ordered someone to follow her, why would they want her to know? Was it an attempted to fool her? Maybe, he wasn't the real tail. Then what was he?

Toni took a look around, but she didn't notice anyone else tailing her, not that she expected to, because she really wasn't trained to notice tails. She didn't know what she was looking for. She only noticed the sucky tail, who seemed to want to be caught. She watched as he turned and walked away with his arms behind his back. Being the risky idiot that she was, Toni followed after him, without a second thought about her safety.

It was getting dark but Toni didn't care because for the last hour, she had been following her stalker and getting close. Though she wasn't sure, she didn't think he had spotted her, and this was a good opportunity to see what this guy was up to. She would find out if he had been ordered to follow her by the Colonel. She knew the chance of that was low as no military tail should be this sucky. If he was, she would have to give Colonel Salty a firm talking to.

There was hesitation in her step as he turned down an alleyway; however, she was never one to turn away scared. Walking toward the alley, she tried to ignore her rapidly beating heart, but she was failing; however, she didn't stop, because she didn't play chicken. As she entered the alleyway, she wished her smart phone was working so she could use it as a light, but instead, she just played with it in her pocket. As she walked, the noises of the city begin to die down. It made her wonder if someone would be able to hear her screams if she were to scream. "Relax, Stark," she muttered to herself. "Stop thinking like that. Nothing's going to happen."

She took a deep breath as she tried to clear her minds of the negative thoughts. This reminded her of one of those scenes in a horror film. The type where the viewer says, 'you're an idiot for going into that dark alley alone.' Shaking her head, she put on a smile as she tried to hide her fear. She exhaled slowly as she walked pass a dumpster, which was only a few feet away from the back of the alley way.

"That's strange," she uttered as she took a long look around. She had seen the stalker come down the alley and there was no way out, so he had to be here. Sure it was dark, but it wasn't that dark, and she should've seen him leave if he did leave. "How could I have lost him in the first place?" she asked. This stalker was supposed to be sucky. He was better than what she gave him credit for, and that worried her.

Toni turned to leave, but she didn't make it one foot as she was slammed against the brick wall. The Stalker (she doubted it was anyone else) hadn't been gentle when he pinned her to the wall. Her head hit the wall hard, and it left her dazed for a seconds. She knew it would leave a mark, but that wasn't the only mark she would have. Her good arm was smashed into dumpster, while Rogers' jacket ripped catching on some metal piece sticking out. It wasn't long enough to cut her, but she felt it drag against her skin, scratching her. Her broken arm was pinned against her body in an uncomfortable position.

Without much thought, she swung her good arm, but he caught it easy and pinned it above her head. "It won't be that easy." There was a hint of laugher in his voice. "No lady can best me."

That pissed her the hell off, because she was just as good as any man. "Asshole," she yelled as she kneed him in the groin.

Like any guy would, he bent over in pain, but he still had a hand on her. "You Bitch," he yelped as he looked away. She saw this as an opening and head-butted him. They both cursed in pain, but he let her go.

"You should stop talking about yourself," she replied with a heavy breath. "That isn't very nice." As soon as he let her go, she ran; however, she had only made it a few feet before he came to his senses. He had grabbed her from the back of her neck and ram her into the brick wall. Her face smashed into the wall and she was completely helpless. She couldn't even open her eyes.

"You should just shut up," he hissed as he flipped her without much effort.

After she regained her senses, she looked up to meet her attacker, who placed his hand firmly on her mouth to stop her from screaming or talking back. She could see the red mark on his face from her head butt, but it was his eyes that stopped her cold. He was staring deep into her eyes, looking for something, and she did her best to part up a front, though she didn't think it worked. His smirk cut her deep.

"Some would call it stupid to follow a stranger into a dark alley at night," the stalker stated. His voice was rough and emotionless, and that shocked her.

She refused to show how scared she was so she focused on the smell of the nasty trash and not the emotionless voice. Maybe, the smell would put some other emotion besides fear in her. She shook her head, trying to free her hand. "Or smart," she retorted back, knocking his hand away.

He inched his face closer to hers. He could kiss her if he wanted to. "It's such a shame a pretty lady like yourself has to be caught up in this." There was a pause. "However, you need to work on being respectful. I guess my master would show you that."

Toni turned away as not to look him in the eyes. "Did anyone tell you your breath smells?" she asked, mockingly. She wanted to ask him what he thought she was caught in and who this master was, but she decided not to play his game. "Do you not know what a toothbrush is?" She closed her eyes waiting to be hit, but it did not come.

However, he grabbed her face and made her look into his eyes. "You should watch what you say."

"I never watch what I say. That's no fun," she teased, trying to give her best playful voice.

He laughed. "I see. However, you should be focused on-" The Stalker couldn't finish his sentence as he was ripped off her and was thrown to the ground. Toni stumbled forward without anyone holding her.

She looked up to her savior, expect either Barnes or Rogers (not that she expected Captain Shrimp to be able to do that), but she didn't see either of them. The unfamiliar man was a big well-built man, who stood high and proud. That was a trait that Toni could respect. The only thing funny about him was his facial hair that covered half of his face; she wouldn't want to kiss that.

Toni caught him looking at her as if he was trying to judge her mental and physical health. She wasn't sure if he saw what he wanted but he was smiling at her. He turned to the Stalker, who hadn't gotten to his feet yet, and glared. As the stranger reached down to grab him, the Stalker rolled back and flipped out of the way. Before the stranger could react, Toni's tail bolted out of the alley.

Her savior looked at her. "Don't go anywhere. I'll be right back," he said as he chased after him.

She closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he walked away. It was then that she started to fall apart. Her heart was beating was so fast that it was hard to breathe, forcing her to her knees. Every bad choice that she had made flashed before her eyes, sending her to a panic attack. Why did she think she could do this? Why did she always put herself in situations that she couldn't win? Did she not care about her own wellbeing? She could've gotten hurt or worse because she didn't think first. This was a why the Captain was always yelling at her.

"I…I…can't…breathe," she stated as she played with her collar, trying to loosen it. It was suddenly getting too hot, and it had started to snow again. "I don't know what to do. What am I doing?" Her Tail could've killed her and there was nothing she could've done. She wasn't able to protect herself. When he had her pinned, her brain was useless and she couldn't do anything.

Taking deep breaths, she failed to calm herself down and tears started to fall. "I'm an idiot," she thought. He could've done anything he wanted, and it wasn't for that kind stranger, he could have.

Shaking her head, Toni pushed herself up and wiped her eyes. She didn't want to wait for that man to come back. She needed to get away, far far away. She didn't want to be here anymore and she just wanted to go home, her home in the future with the Avengers.

Getting on her feet, she did all but run out of the alley with no care how she looked or who she ran into.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Toni. It looks like she is never going to get a break.


	12. What must be done.

Toni took a deep breath as she tried to calm herself. She didn't want the guys to see her like this, but she knew she couldn't hide this from them. She was a mess inside and out; there was no way she could control her emotions in her present state. Maybe, Rogers would be too pissed to notice and Barnes would be too distracted by a pissed Rogers. O' god, she hoped so. She couldn't deal with their questions right now.

She held her right arm close to her body with her left hand as she walked up the steps to the apartment. She felt so weak that she wondered if she would ever succeed in getting back to her own time. How could she break into her father's company and steal back her device if she couldn't defend herself? How could she get past the guards like this?

As she reached the apartment door, her eyes were watering. "Stop being a baby," she yelled at herself, wiping the tears. She needed to be strong and not a weakling. Taking a deep breath, she stepped to the door and opened it slightly enough to slide through. She poked her head in to scoop it out, and to her joy, all the lights were off, which would make it easy to sneak in. She slipped through the door and closed it softly behind her. Taking a deep breath, she headed to bathroom, where she could be alone, but she didn't make it too far.

"Toni," Rogers called, softly. Toni flinched at the sound of his voice. After getting over her shock, she could tell that he was worried.

She closed her eyes, not daring to look back at him. He couldn't see her like this. "Hey…Sorry, I'm late." she said slowly. Her own voice sounded broken and shattered. There was no way he wouldn't be able to tell.

"Toni, are you okay?" Rogers took a few steps toward her.

"I'm fine." Her voice was betraying her; she hoped he wouldn't notice.

"Look at us," Barnes said. It sounded like an order, which was something Toni didn't like. Out of principle, she would not listen.

"I'm fine." Why couldn't they leave her alone? Just thinking about what had happened to her brought tears back to her eyes and chills to her bones. She took a deep breath, as she tried to forget the stalker's breath on her face.

Light flashed on startling Toni, but she didn't move. "Turn around, Toni," Barnes ordered. His voice was hard.

"Easy, Bucky," Rogers stated, turning to Barnes. It was clear that he didn't like Barnes' tone. He turned back to Toni. "Toni, what happened? You had us worried."

She might as well show them now and get this over with as they would notice soon enough. She took another deep breath, as she wiped her tears again. "You guys are worrying for nothing," she declared, turning around. She tried her best to put on a smile as she stared them down. With his arms folded across his chest, Barnes was leaning against the counter, and Steve was standing in front of the couch. She could see the looks on their faces when they laid their eyes on her. She did not like it one bit.

"What happened?" Rogers asked, shock presented on his face. He took a few steps toward her, but stopped when he noticed the pain look on her face.

Barnes straightened himself up and walked to her. "Toni," he called when he was a few feet from her. He reached out to her, but she turned away. "He did this, didn't he?"

Toni closed her eyes as she took a few steps away from them. "Barnes," she uttered as she hid her face in her hands. She didn't want to them to see her like this.

"Did he?" he asked again, as he stepped to her. He pulled her toward him, and after a bit of struggling, he had her in his arms. It was clear that he wasn't going to let her go. "Tell me." He was angry, but she wasn't sure if he was angry at her or the stalker.

"Who is this he?" Rogers asked, as he eyed the two. There was something in his tone that Toni couldn't read.

Toni glanced at Rogers before giving a hard push to Barnes. "My stalker and yes," she answered, hating that she had to admit that she had a stalker. "And I don't want to talk about it." Before they could say anything, Toni bolted into the bathroom. She locked it as soon as the door was closed. "I really don't want to talk about it!"

The doorknob wiggled as someone tried to open the door. "Toni, open the door. Let us in, please," Rogers begged as he banged on the door.

"Toni, what happened?" Barnes asked, in the softest voice he could muster.

She took a deep breath as she tried to get the nights events out of her mind. She hadn't felt this useless in a while and that was something she didn't know how to handle. "Please, leave me alone," she begged as she looked at herself in the mirror. She was a hot mess and not in a good way. Her hair was a mad mess and her clothes were filthy. She had a huge scratch on her face and a red hand print around her neck. "Please, just go."

"Open the door," Rogers said as he banged on the door. "You can't stay in there forever." If this was the future, he would have broken the door in, which he had done before at the tower. "Talk to me."

At that moment, he sounded like the future Rogers and Toni didn't like it. She liked the past Rogers so much better than the future one, and she wouldn't listen to him if he continued to sound like that.

"Toni," Barnes called. "Tell us what happened, so I can beat the asshole, who did this to you."

It touched her to hear that from Barnes, but she didn't need or that. What she needed was to get back to her time, and in order to do that, she needed to break into Stark Industries. She didn't have time to worry about her emotional state. Toni took the phone out of her pocket and stared at it. She closed her eyes as she slid down the wall and sat in the corner. Though she would deny it aggressively to anyone who asked, she was panicking. Tears poured from her eyes and she was having a hard time breathing.

"Toni," Rogers called, banging on the door again. Judging from his voice, he was out of breath and was sitting as well.

"Steve, I don't think she's coming out," Barnes stated. "We need to let her come to us."

"You can leave, but I'm going to stay here," Rogers replied.

If she wasn't crying and scared, she would have thought Rogers' determination was cute, but she didn't want to think about that. Toni shook her head as she took a deep breath, and she allowed her mind and thoughts to overtake her.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

_Toni didn't know how long she had been running, but she had been running for a while. Glancing over her shoulder as she ran, horror filled her; she hadn't been able to put any distance between them. The shadow was still behind her and it was closing the distance fast. Though she was running out of breath and energy, she pushed her body harder._

_Remembering something in her self-defense class, she started to zigzag, but that didn't help her as the shadow was still able to keep up with her. In seconds, she was pinned against a brick wall with a hand firmly around her neck, and no matter how much she fought, she couldn't get it off her. She forced herself to look at the shadow, which morphed into a man with no-face. He was laughing at her with such an evil laugh that it sent shivers down her spine. "Pretty."_

_She opened her mouth to speak, but nothing came out._

_The no-face man's hand danced on the helm of her shirt. "It would be so easy to have you." His hands felt cold against her skin as his fingers moved down to the rim of her jeans._

_Still no sound came from her lips. It was as if someone had cut out her tongue. She closed her eyes as she tried not to think about the man's fingers on her. She was filled with panic and…shame as her body started to react to his touches._

" _However, my master would not approve," the man whispered in her ear. His breath was hot. His fingers left her skin, which relieved her, but it wasn't over. The hand, around her neck, started to tighten, making it harder to breath. She tried to claw his hand off, but nothing she did worked. "Don't fight me. It'll just make it worse. Just close your eyes."_

_But she didn't listen, and she continue to fight._

" _You should listen," he stated as his free hand disappeared behind his back. She didn't have time to think why, before he stabbed her in the stomach with a long blade. She screamed as she never felt so much pain before in her life._

Toni woke up covered in sweat. She would've screamed if she could've, but her throat felt like it was on fire. The dream felt so real that she had to lift up her shirt to make sure she hadn't been stabbed. Though she knew it was a fucken dream, she expected there to be blood. "What's wrong with me?" she asked as she was bent over trying to catch her breath.

Her neck and back were in pain as she pushed herself up. She had slept at a weird angle with her head rested on Rogers' ripped jacket, and it hurt to move. She stretched herself out as she tried to work out the knots in her body. She had fallen asleep in a bathroom before, but this was the worst that she had ever felt the next morning. Maybe, she could convince them to add some pillows as this wouldn't be the only time she slept in here.

She didn't know when she had fallen asleep, but she couldn't have been asleep for more than a few hours at the best. It was still dark out, when she woke, and that meant she could sneak out of the bathroom. She opened the door and took a step out, almost tripping over a sleeping Rogers.

"What the hell?" she whispered as she had to jump over Rogers' body. "Idiot." She said, kneeing down. "That mustn't be comfortable." Hesitating for a second, she brushed the hair out of Rogers' eyes. "You're too cute for your own good," she admitted. She would never say that to his face as she would never hear the end of it. As she stood up, she looked over Rogers, who looked smaller than normal. He didn't take up much room on the floor.

Shaking her head, Toni was tempted to leave him there, but she couldn't. She kneed down again and put her hand on his shoulder to shake him. He moved slightly under her touch, but he didn't stir. "Rogers," she called, but he still didn't wake. "Rogers," she called again. She had no idea that he was such a heavy sleeper. "Steve," she stated, switching to his first name. It felt weird to say it. She shook him harder.

His eyes flicked. "Toni," he muttered as he opened his eyes. "Are you okay?" He pushed himself up into a hitting position and it was clear by his stiffness that his back hurt. "Toni," he stated as he reached for her. To both of their surprises, she let him put a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm fine," she replied, having nothing else to say. "You shouldn't sleep on the floor. It isn't very good for your back." She stood up slowly and Rogers' hand fell from her shoulder.

"I wasn't going to leave you after what happened," he explained as he eyed her cheek.

Toni took a deep breath. She could see that he was exhausted. "Why don't you go to bed in your room?" she asked as she reached to him to help him up. She had no idea how long he had been asleep at the bathroom door. If she wasn't annoyed at him for his gentlemen qualities, she would hug him or something. He was so cute and adorable at this size.

"I-" he started, but Toni interrupted him.

"If you go to bed, I'll talk to you in the morning," she said, lying through her teeth. "I'll take the couch."

Though he looked like he wanted to fight her, he put on a small smile and walked to his room. "I will hold you to that," he stated as he disappeared into his room.

After a few minutes, Toni crossed to Rogers' door and peaked in. "Geez, asleep alright." She could only make out his form in the darkness, but she could tell by his stiffness that he was out. Shaking her head, she crossed back to the couch. She reached into her pocket for her broke phone and set it on the table before reaching for her tools that were still hidden under the coffee table.

Toni took the sling off so she could have better movement of her arm, and she took a seat on the floor in front of the table. She should go to bed, but one, she was a night owl, and two, each time she closed her eyes she saw that no-face man. She couldn't sleep with his haunting face…or lack of one. She wished she had her special pills that she had in the future, which no one knew about. She used the pills to sleep, because she had a hard time going to bed without them. With her genius mind, it was hard to get her mind to stop, and then, there were the panic attacks. It was hard to sleep without dreaming about _the fall_. The battle of New York affected her more than she let on. She took a deep breath as she hated to hear that lecture if the gang ever found out.

She took the back off the phone and pulled the battery out. Using the flat head, she pried the black hard covering off the phone to reveal the motherboard. She studied it, trying to see how badly damaged it was. To her luck, she could fix it. She also knew she could convert the camera into a scanner, and depending on her father's system, she might be able to hack his system using a radio frequency; however, she doubted his system worked on some kind of frequencies in this time. If she had some kind of hook up on this scanner, that might work.

Slowly as not to break it, she detached the screen, which she would still use. Gently, she pulled out CPU, which she needed for the scanner. If she ruined that, there would be no way she could fix it in this time. After that, she took out the chipset and separated the rest of the pieces. She laid them out on the table.

With her arms on the table, she rested her chin on her hands and stared at each of the pieces. She would need some kind of heating element to fuse them together. Maybe, there was something at the tool store that she could use…or there was that idea she had earlier.

Picking up the CPU, Toni stared at it as she wondered if she should just tell Colonel Salty the truth. She took a deep breath and exhaled as that wasn't something that she wanted to do. He might lock her in a psych ward… but if this device didn't work, she would have no choice but go straight to the Colonel and explain everything. She hoped he could keep a secret, because if he did tell anyone (like Rogers or her father), the future could be screwed.

"Whatta ya doin'?"

If Toni wasn't so startled, she would have laughed at Barnes' question. She was annoyed that someone was able to sneak up on her. She was really losing her touch. "Why are you up at time?" she asked, making no motion to hide her stuff on the table. She could try, but she wasn't willing to risk damaging them in the attempt to hide them.

In hesitation, he took a few steps toward her. "Couldn't sleep," he stated, shrugging it off. "How are you?"

Toni took a deep breath. "People like to ask me that," she answered, not wanting to answer that.

He rubbed his chin as he exhaled slowly. "And you don't like to answer questions."

She stared at him from the corner of her eyes. "Not to questions I don't like," she admitted. She hated talking about her health and her weaknesses.

"So are you going to talk about it?" he asked as he took a seat on the chair next to the couch. His eyes flecked to the broken down phone on the table, and from his spot, he could see some of the pieces were burnt. He didn't ask though.

Toni looked down at her materials. "No, I'm not." She wasn't sure what she could tell him, because she wasn't really sure what had happened. At first, she thought he was Colonel's tail, but now, she didn't think so. She doubted the Salty wanted her dead. Scared yes, but dead, no. He needed her for something. She closed her eyes as this could've been a trick and she was never in any real danger, but that couldn't be right.

"I see you talked Steve to bed," he turned to the bathroom. "He had fallen asleep at the door the last I checked."

"I said I would tell him what had happened to me in the morning, if he did."

"And you lied, right?"

"Yup," she smiled at him.

"You have to tell someone. You can't keep it in. I can see it is bothering you."

She pushed herself up and onto the couch. "Did you think it was because I don't want to talk to you?" she snapped. "I'm sorry that I don't tell strangers my deep dark secrets." She regretted her tone and words the second she heard them.

Barnes took a deep breath. "I'm sorry that I overstepped. I won't do it again." He stood up and turned away from her. "And just in case you wanted to know, Steve has been very worried about you. I would ask that you aren't this harsh with him as you were with me. He is too naive to handle it, and I'm not sure he would be able to handle that with me gone." With that, he headed to his room.

"Geez, you make me look like a bad guy. What's wrong with not wanting to answer questions?" She knew she should shut up, but it was hard letting someone else have the last word.

"It's not that," Barnes stated as he turned back to her for a second. "It's your I-don't-care-about-others attitude. You can't treat people like that and expect people to like you." He disappeared into his bedroom. She was going to open her mouth to protest, but she decided against it.

It irritated her that everyone thought Rogers was the one that needed to be protected. What was she? Chop liver? It annoyed her so badly, but she needed to let it go. This wasn't her time and she didn't belong here.

She picked up the pieces off the table and slipped them in her bag. Without bothering to change her clothes, she kicked her shoes off and laid down on the couch. She let herself drift.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

She had woken up the next two mornings with tears running down her cheeks. Her hand went to her throat, and after talking a few deep breaths, she was able to convince herself that she was fine. She closed her eyes and told herself that everything was fine and she was safe.

"Are you okay, Toni?"

Toni jumped at the sound. "I'm fine," she said, trying to hide her fear. She hadn't been able to sleep lately and it had put her on edge. She knew she couldn't be able to keep this up.

Barnes crouched down in front of her, which she wasn't expecting. He hadn't talked to her since _that_ morning as he was annoyed with her. Rogers didn't know what had happened, but he wasn't going to get involved. "Toni," he uttered as he looked up into her eyes.

She wanted to look away, but his eyes held her in place. He was wearing dress pants and a tan dress shirt signaling that he would be leaving for the Military soon. There was a part of her that wanted to tell him not to go, but she knew it would be stupid if she did. "I'm fine."

With a bit of hesitation, he wiped the tears from her eyes. "How often do you have nightmares?" he asked. He had a hand on her knee in a sign of support.

"Not too often," she stated, not wanting to admit how bad she had it.

Barnes reached up to wipe another tear. "I'll admit that I don't like to see you cry."

She hated talking about her emotions. "Don't you have somewhere to be?" she asked, as she nodded toward the door. He had his bags ready.

"I leave shortly. I'm just waiting for Steve to get dressed. He's walking me to the bus stop," he said with a smile. "But…" He paused as he thought for a second. He pulled her into a bear hug. Toni was utterly confused and not sure how to handle this. "I will miss your spunk."

Toni closed her eyes and laughed. "Trust me, you won't miss this spunky mess." She tried to push him off, but Barnes wouldn't let her go and just held her tighter. "And you can let go now."

"Only if you promised that you'll be good."

"I promised," Toni stated, not sure if she could or not.

Barnes let her go and gave her smile. "I will hold you to that." He stood up and walked to the door for his bags. "And I expect my bed to be nice and warm when I get back." He gave her a wink that could get any girl hot at the knees, including her. "I hate a cold bed."

"You'll find it is harder to bed me than other women," she teased with a smile.

"I like a challenge," he replied, with a wink. Toni just laughed. "I can think-"

"I can't leave you two alone for a minute, can I?" Rogers stated as he entered the room. He had a smile on his face, as he was clearly glad that they were talking again. "Anyhow, we better get going, Bucky."

Toni watched them leave, not knowing if she would see Barnes again before he died. She felt a rush of guilty and she felt sick to her stomach.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

The next few weeks went by faster than Toni expected. After she got the correct tools, she was able to convert her smart phone into a portal hacking device. Though she had yet to test the device, it should be able to hack any computer system and unlock any computerize lock; however, just in case her father only had manual locks, she had obtained a small lock picking kit. She had honed her skills on a few different locks that she had found at the hardware store.

She also uses these weeks to watch Stark Industries, in which she had noticed a small hole in the security that she could sneak through. Now, she just needed to pick the time to sneak in, but that would have to wait until the cast came off. Hopefully, it would be in the next week, or she would take a saw to it herself. It was the itchiest thing on the planet.

Toni took a deep breath as she thought about her growing relationship with Rogers. Since that night he slept outside the bathroom and with it being just her and Rogers in the apartment, she had become a little (she refused to be any more than a little) closer to him. The closer she got to him, the less she could hate him, and she loved to hate him. Then there was the fact that it was getting easier and easier for him to read her, which annoyed her. He had been able to see that she wasn't sleeping.

On the plus side, she hadn't seen her stalker since the night in the alley…though, it didn't mean he wasn't still following her. He could be and she might not be aware of it, which scared the shit out of her. As she took a deep breath, she told herself that she couldn't allow it to get to her. She had shit that she had to do and she couldn't waste time on feeling scared.

Toni walked into the apartment to find Rogers on the couch with a depressed look on his face. "You tried to enlist again, didn't you?" she asked as she took a seat next to him.

"Yes, and I got turned down again." He looked so small, hunched over.

She wasn't sure what to say to him, as she knew the future. She could tell him to keep trying and that he would make it through, but how could she say that? No sane military recruiter would take Rogers. He had asthma, he was anemia, and there were other countless things wrong with him. However, she didn't want to kill his dream, because he needed his dream. It was the reason why he became Captain America, and this country needed that. "Are you going to keep trying?"

He looked up at her and weakly smiled. "I don't know. It would be pointless." He looked so defeated. "I think I might give up."

"NO! You can't." If he did that, the whole damn future would be messed up.

Rogers laughed. "Why shouldn't I? My asthma alone makes me ineligible." He stood up and crossed to the window. "And let's not forget my color blindness."

Toni blinked a few times because she was never aware that he was color blinded. "Rogers."

His shoulders fell. "I hate that you call me Rogers. Why can't you call me Steve?" He sounded depressed.

She stood there unsure of what to say to the depressed Rogers. "I call everyone by their last name. It's my thing." She closed her eyes. There were only five people that she didn't refer to by their last names: Pepper, Rhodey (yes it was a play off on his last name, but that didn't count), Happy, Bruce and Clint (which was a recent development). Okay, there was also Thor…..but he really didn't have a last name besides Odinson, and she didn't consider that a last name. With Rogers, it was on principle that she called him by his last name.

Rogers looked back to her and opened his month to say something but decided against it.

It was that look that killed her. "I'm sorry, Steve." It felt weird on her tongue, but it was worth it to see the smile on his face. He had asked her before to call him Steve and she didn't. This time, she would try her best to call him Steve. "But I still don't think you should give up."

"Why is that?"

"Because your drive is impressive." She smiled. "They'll want someone with that kind of drive." Rogers…No, Steve. She would refer to him as Steve. She liked past Steve and she would refer to him by Steve; however, future asshole would still be Rogers to her. "I don't like it when you're depressed."

Steve crossed to her and putted on a smile. "Then I will smile."

"Just make sure you don't quit."

"I won't. I promise."

"I will hold you to that."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni had decided to take another look at Stark's security before heading home from work, which was annoying as ever. She really couldn't stand the sexist attitudes of the assholes who walked by. Did they really think they were going to get in her pants that easy? Really? Were they stupid? Why in earth would she want to sleep with anyone of them when they kept insulting her because she was a woman? Just because she was female, it didn't mean that she was stupid or obedient to man. Just because she was a working girl, it did not mean she would spread her legs for anyone. Yes, she had a reputation of being a slut (one that she had started to regret), but that did not mean anything. She was not easy.

She took a deep breath as she forced those assholes out of her mind. She had other things to worry about like Rogers…Steve. It was so weird to refer to him by his first name and she still hadn't gotten used to it yet. There was a part of her that wanted to keep calling him Rogers, but she had seen the way he smiled when she called him by his name. If she was going to try and befriend him like Barnes wanted, she would call him Steve….It was still weird.

During her walk to the apartment, she kept an eye open for any possible danger, because even if she refused to be afraid, she still had to be careful. She had to be smart about this and not let her mind run wild. She needed to be logical, because if she allowed herself to get emotional, she would not accomplished what she needed to do. She needed to get her device back and find some way to power it, which would be difficult. There wasn't any that she could think of, but she would find something.

A color flier caught her eyes. It was an army recruitment poster, which had seen better days. The ends of the poster had started to peel and rip. The bright colors had started to lose its color, making her wonder how long it had been hanging there. She was surprised that it hadn't been replaced, considering there was an army recruitment station a block down. Toni could see the long line from here. "I wonder if R-Steve is there." She wasn't sure if he would be, considering their conversation a few nights ago. She really hoped he wasn't an idiot and gave up. If he did, she was going to beat his ass.

Exhaling, Toni continued her walk back to the apartment, but she didn't make it too far, hearing something. "What is that?" she asked herself, as she turned in the direction of the noise. It sounded like a fight, and she knew what a fight sounded like as she had been in a lot herself. Against her better judgment, she headed toward the sound. Her heart stopped when she arrived at the location of the sound…It was an alley. "Stop being a chicken," she yelled herself.

She took a step into the alley and froze. Her nightmare returned, almost forcing her to her knees, as she could only see a hand around her neck, choking her. It was getting hard to breathe and she thought she was going to faint. "It's just an alley," she told herself as she tried to relax herself. She focused on the voices and not the images in her mind. "Just listen."

"Just keeping it coming. I can handle it."

Toni's eyes widened at the sound of Steve's voice and the sound of him getting his ass beat. It pissed her the hell off that someone was beating up Steve, the Shrimp. Why would someone beat him up? He was small and not a threat in anyway. Using her anger, she looked forward and pushed herself forward. Her heat beat rapidly.

"I will," came the bully response.

Exhaling, she forced herself to think about Steve and not her nightmares that plagued her. As she rounded a corner in the alley, she saw the asshole that was beating up Steve, and she saw red. He had Steve by the collar against the wall. "Hey, asshole, get your stinking hands off him," she demanded.

The bully dropped Steve and turned to her. He put on a creepy smile. "Look what we have here. You're such a pretty thing. Maybe, when I'm done with him, we can go out."

"No way in hell would I go out with a jerk like you," she stated getting in his face. "Why don't you get lost before I make you cry?"

A worried Steve looked up from his spot on the ground. "Toni, stop. I got this." He pushed himself up and wobbled as he tried to stand. "I don't need you to stand up for me."

Toni spared him a glance before turning back to the bully. "Go," she ordered. Her good hand was balled, ready to punch the asshole in the face. Even with a broken arm, she could still kick ass...Her mind frozen for a second as it flashed back to the hand round her neck again.

"Why would I leave such a pretty dame alone?" he asked as he put an arm around her. "We could go out. Why would you want to be around a guy like that?"

It took her a few seconds to realize what the pig was doing and where his hand was. She slapped him hard crossed his face and kneed him in the family jewels. He went down in seconds. "I don't date slim balls," she glared down at him. "Now get lost."

The asshole struggled to get to his feet. "That wasn't very nice. Someone should teach you matters. I would be happy to do so." He stepped to her, too close for Toni's liking, but she did not move. She stared him down. "You have some balls."

"Why thank you." She paused as she put on a smile. "You don't. It's a shame, isn't it? Picking on someone smaller than yourself?" she mocked. She glanced toward Steve, who was looking intensely at the ground.

"Why you-"

"Why I what?" she interrupted. "Why don't you leave before I beat you again?" Her heart was still beating rapidly as the bully did not move. He just stood still.

He glanced at Steve before taking a step to the side. "So not worth it," he stated as he turned to leave. "But if you change your mind, Fire Rocket, let me know." He slapped her on the ass before leaving.

_Fire Rocket?_ Toni turned. "Next time you touched my ass, I will shove your foot up your ass," she hissed as she watched him wobbled away. Shaking her head, she turned to Steve, who had gotten to his feet. "Steve, are you okay?" she asked, reaching out to him. Steve stared at her hand before walking away. "What's wrong?" she asked.

"I didn't need your help." His back was toward her. "I could have handled that."

"He was beating you up." She recognized the tension in his shoulders, which was the same tension she had always seen in him when he was talking to her in the future. Why was he so pissed at her? "Did you want me to let him? He could have killed you."

Steve turned to her. "Yes!" There was a pause. "I don't need you to save me. Why kind of man gets saved by a dame with a broken arm?"

She suddenly got pissed at him. She never expected him to get sexist on her. "Geez, Rogers," she stated. He frowned at the use of his last name. "You would rather get beat up, almost die, just to save your manhood? I'm not good enough to save you?" She paused as she tried to calm herself, but she failed. "I didn't think you were a chauvinist pig." She stated as she stormed off, not waiting for him to response. He reminded her too much of the future Captain which she didn't like.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

After that fight, Rogers (he was Rogers again to her) and Toni hadn't spoken in a few days. She knew Rogers wanted to talk to her as she caught him staring at her, but she wasn't going to make the first move. She refused to make the first move, because she was Toni Stark, damn it. People came to her, not the other way around. Besides, it would be best if they didn't make up. She didn't need him missing her.

Shaking her head, she laid in Barnes bed and stared at the ceiling. It was strange to sleep in his bed as she still couldn't get pass the smell of his room, which smelled like him. Even the colors and fabrics of the room were so strongly him. Toni could almost see him laying in bed with her, and it made her sick. Rolling over, she covered her head with his pillow as she tried not to think about Barnes' death.

Toni rolled back over and stared at her left arm, which was cast-less. She had seen a hot doctor (yes, she flirted), who had stated it had healed quite well and the cast could come off. He had told her that it was going to be sore, which it was, and that she should avoid any heavy lifting, but it was useable. Even with the pain, she was still glad it was off, because the cast was the most annoying thing on the planet and she would do anything to avoid getting another cast.

Toni exhaled as she still had things to worry about. She still had to figure out how to power the damn device. If only her arc reactor was working at 100%, she could tap into that, even though it was risky. She took another deep breath as she tried to think of something. _What do you have access to that you can use_? She thought to herself. There wasn't much she could think of. Maybe, the Colonel had something; he had access to a lot of things.

Taking a deep breath, Toni pushed herself into a sitting position and stared at the wall. She had things to do and she couldn't spend all day hiding from Rogers. She did have to go to work, which meant she would have to leave the room. She couldn't understand why she was being foolish about this whole thing. It annoyed her.

Acting like an adult, she walked out of Barnes' bedroom and into the kitchen. Rogers, who was sitting at the table, looked up then looked back down quickly. He hadn't made eye contact for more than two second, which bothered her. He sat very still and positioned a newspaper in front of his face so she couldn't see his face. "Rogers, we need to get over this," she stated, deciding she would rather make up with him than suffer this awkwardness anymore.

He put the paper down slowly and turned to her, but his eyes didn't stay on her for long. "It came out wrong before."

"Did you mean it? You didn't want me to save you?" she asked.

"…I did mean it." There had been some hesitation in his voice.

"So how did it come out wrong?" she asked. It annoyed her that he didn't want to be saved by her, but she guessed she could understand. She wouldn't want to be saved by anyone as well. She could save herself.

Rogers stood up and took a few steps toward her. "I wanted to explain, but I couldn't find the right words." He took a deep breath. "I….It isn't about you saving me. I just don't want to be saved. I want to be strong enough to save myself." He paused. "I hate being useless, which is what I am." He closed his eyes for a second before looking up. "I want to say sorry; it wasn't meant to be an insult. Please understand."

She knew how he felt. "It's fine, Steve." She would be insulted as well if someone tried to save her.

He smiled at the use of his first name. "At least, I'll always know when you're mad at me by the use of my last name."

Toni let out a chuckle. "This is true."

"I see your case is off."

"Just got it off." Toni waved her arm in the air. "I can move it! It feels so great." She paused as she noticed his smile, which seemed to take up his whole face. "Anyhow, I need to get to work."

"I will walk with you." She had no interest in turning him down, because the attack was still fresh in her mind.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni let out a loud laugh as Steve tried to act something out. Having decided to stay in, Steve and she were playing charades. Since she had started to call him Steve (the second time), everything had come together with them. She never did talk to him about the night she had been attacked or about the many nightmares that she had been having, but they did talk about things: his love life being one of those things. She kept trying to play wing man and get him a girlfriend, because he needed love in his life…. He also needed to get laid. She wouldn't let him be a 90 year old virgin, which could loosen up the future Rogers; however, Steve wanted no part in it. "Really, I have no fucken idea what you are," she stated with another laugh.

Steve made a face at swearing, which he always did when she cursed. He wasn't a big fan of her cussing. "I'm an elephant," he stated. "And you're just bad at this game."

"Hey, Hey, Hey. I'm not bad at anything!" she smiled with a wink.

He let out a snort. "You're just as bad as Bucky."

Toni pretended to be hurt. "C'mon, I'm not as bad as Barnes."

Steve snorted. "Maybe." She opened her mouth as if to say something in protest. "I was kidding."

"I know."

"So it's your turn," he stated as he took a seat next to her.

"You don't want to do something else?" she asked. She was so up to playing wingman. "We can always go out."

"You just want to hook me up again," he muttered annoyed. "I thought we learned this the last time that no one wants a guy like me." He sounded depressed.

"You need to have faith!" She cheered as she grabbed onto his arm. "Any woman would be proud to have you. You just need to show them your personality."

He let out a chuckle. "That's what they say about losers."

Toni's hand dropped to Steve's knees. "You can't believe that. If you do, I'll beat you," she threatened as she lifted up her arms.

Steve smiled weakly. "Can't we just stay in? I'd rather be here…with you." His voice was soft.

"Sure, we can," she answered, as she tried to think of some ways that she could get his confidence up. She couldn't get over how different he was from the present day Rogers. "Let me think of something I can be." She stood up and put her hand to her head to think. "I got it. You really?"

"I am."

Toni would let him be happy today, because he would probably not see her again. Either she succeeded and got back to her time or failed and ended in jail. Though she felt bad at the thought of leaving him, she had to do it. She had to get her device back, and now that her cast was off, there was no stopping her from breaking into Stark industries.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the next chapter, we'll see if Toni will be able to break in and steal back her device


	13. The Unbelievable Truth

Toni knew the perfect time to break into Stark Industries, and it was during the Stark Expo, while her father was on stage showing off like he always did. While he was making a fool out of himself, she would be sneaking into his company and stealing back her device. Hopefully by the time he found out, she would be long gone… though she still had no idea of how to power it without another arc reactor.

Taking a deep breath, she walked out of Barnes' room and looked around the apartment for Steve, but he was nowhere to be found. _He's probably trying to enlist again_ , she thought. She knew he would get in eventually, though she wasn't sure when that would be and how that would be. Her mind wandered a bit, as she thought about Captain America. How did the sweet little Steve turn into the asshole Captain Rogers? Was it the serum? It changed his body. Maybe, it changed his mind.

A part of her didn't want him to change. She wanted him to stay the same tiny Steve, but it wasn't her choice. What she wanted didn't matter. The world needed the Asshole, and no matter how attached (a fact that she hated and would deny) she was to the Shrimp, Toni Stark did not need him. She liked him but she did _not_ need him. She could get along without him just she always did, because she did not need anyone.

Shaking her head, she grabbed a jacket and headed out to look for Steve, because he _needed_ her. He needed her for support, as she seemed to be the only thing in his life at the moment, which annoyed her slightly. Why was it her job to cheer him up? She barely knew him, really. She didn't know him in the future and she didn't know the past him either. So why did she try? She knew she didn't have to, but she didn't like him depressed and it wasn't because she cared (she refused to care). It was because he was annoying to be around when he was that.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

It had taken her quite a while to find him as Steve had gone to multiple recruitment centers under different names to enlist, and she didn't know which one he went to. When she finally found Steve, he was walking out of an army recruitment center. He was behind a few other men, who looked like they had been rejected as well. They looked tired and small as well, but compared to Steve, they were giants. Even with him right in front of her, it was hard to believe that there was someone as small as Steve in the world. How did he survive being that small? Even now, the other small men were making fun of him.

Trying to calm herself before she walked over there, she took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Steve didn't like it when she defended him, and though she really didn't care if he liked it or not, she didn't want to irritate him on their last day together. After the other men were gone, Toni crossed to him wearing a big smile. "Hey! No sad face!" she cheered. "Turn that frown upside down!"

Steve looked at her. "Why should I smile? I got rejected again."

Toni took a deep breath. "Maybe, it isn't right, yet? Maybe, God has a plan for you." That statement felt weird on her tongue. She didn't really believe in God, but she knew Steve was a firm believer in God. He found peace in God's name, while she found annoyance. If there was a God, how could he allow so much pain in the world? If there was a God, he must be a heartless God with no care to what happened, and he must really hate her… Not that she blamed him. So many deaths were on her head.

He looked at her. "A plan for me?"

"Yes," Toni responded as they started to walk. "Think about it!" She smiled, weakly. "And don't be so down on yourself." She took a deep breath but she didn't want to reveal too much.

"Do you believe in God, Toni?" Steve asked.

Toni stopped and exhaled slowly. "Does it matter?" She dug her hands into her pockets as she stared down at the ground. She didn't want to ask that question, even if she already knew the answer. It would be a no.

Steve looked at her. "Do you want to see a movie?" he asked as he pointed to a movie theater.

She looked at the _Casablanca_ poster he was pointing too. She had seen that movie a hundred times; it had been one of her favorites growing up. "You want to see a romantic movie?" she asked. Most men would run from a lovely dovely movie. "It's a good movie. I had seen it quite a few times, but I'm not sure you will like it."

He looked at her strangely. "This movie just came out. How did you see it already?" he asked. "But we can always see another movie if you like."

_Shit!_ She thought. She didn't know that the movie was just released. "I saw it a few nights ago." He was eyeing her again with a strange look that she didn't like it. It was clear he didn't believe her. "But, yea, let's go see a movie."

He was still looking at her. "Okay."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni stared at herself in the mirror of the lady's room as Steve went to find them seats for the movie. She couldn't believe that she had slipped up. Taking a deep breath, she tried to shaking the feelings of utter failure. How could she be that stupid? If she didn't wise up, she was going out herself, which she couldn't have. After splashing water on her face, she walked out of the lady room and toward the theatre auditorium.

The room was already dark and the film had already started, which made it hard to spot anyone in the crowd; however, she was able to make out faces in the dark. Toni scanned the crowd looking for Steve, but she couldn't spot him. To get a better view of the crowd, Toni moved down the aisle, but she still wasn't able to spot him. Ignoring all the looks that she was getting, she crossed down to the corner of the auditorium by the screen and scanned the whole crowd. She still could not locate Steve.

Giving up, she headed toward the back of the room, where she came in from. An usher, standing by the door, was staring at her. Though she knew she was a distraction to the whole auditorium, she did not him staring at her. However, she could ask him if he saw Steve. He would remember seeing someone like Steve.

When she got within a feet of the usher, he spoke to her. "Can I help you, Miss?"

Ignoring the annoyance of being called Miss, she answered, "I came with someone, but I can't seem to find him. He's like this high." She put her hand up at the approximate height of Steve. "He kind of looks like a child." She hated to refer to him as a child because he wasn't.

The usher, who didn't look much older than 20, stared at her with a puzzle looked. "You're with him? How the hell did he manage to get a dame like you?"

Toni narrowed her eyes at him. "Have you seen him?" She had no interest of correcting him, as she really didn't care what he thought.

"There was a man, making a lot of noise, and he wouldn't stop, so your boyfriend asked him to step outside."

"And you let them go outside?" She asked, annoyed. Not a second later, she bolted out of the room with no care if the usher said anything else. There wasn't anything that he could say that would interest her. Her mind was on Steve, who was really testing her willpower. He told her countless times that he didn't like her defending him as he wanted to defend himself. He didn't want her help, but right now, Toni didn't know if she could do that.

Knowing where Steve would have taken this man, Toni headed toward the alley. Again, she froze at the mouth of the alley. That damn night still haunted her day and night. How could she do anything if she was frozen with fear? She took a deep breath as she closed her eyes, trying to overcome her fear. "Not all alleys are bad," she told herself.

When she opened her eyes, she noticed someone run past her. She glanced at the guy before turning back to the alley. "Who's he running from? I know it isn't Steve," she said. It only took her a few steps before she came upon a beaten up Steve and a fit Barnes in a uniform. After getting over the shock of seeing him alive, she looked him over. Just like any other woman, Toni loved a man in a uniform, and she was not against admitting that; however, this was not the time for that. "Barnes."

"Hey, Toni," he stated with a smile. "How are you?"

Really that smile of his was not fair. He shouldn't have that kind of power over her. Fighting the urge to hug him, she narrowed her eyes at him. She remembered she should be angry at him, because she thought she had seen a dead man walking. "I see you're back."

"Yes, I am." He replied. He had a big smile on his face.

Shaking her head, she turned her attention to Steve, because she would 'jump' Barnes if he kept smiling at her like that. "Are you okay, Steve?" she asked as she crossed to him. "What's with you and picking fights?" she asked, annoyed at the Shrimp Captain. He had yelled at her for picking fights, but yet, he was doing it himself.

"I wasn't picking a fight. He was causing a disturbance," Steve answered, glancing at Barnes.

"And you also shouldn't leave a lady," she said, punching him in the shoulder. She cursed at herself when she saw him wink in pain. She really didn't mean to hit him that hard….granted, she didn't really hit him hard. She kept forgetting that he couldn't fight his way out of a wet paper bag. "You ditched me, Steve! Or should I just call you Rogers again."

"I'm-"

Barnes broke out laughing, causing them both to stare at him. "Were you two on a date? And here, I'm flirting with her." He paused. "…You're calling him Steve now?"

Toni raised her eyebrow at the sight of Steve and Barnes. Between a laughing Barnes, who looked ready to faint due to a lack of air, and a blood red Steve, who had never been on a date in his life (or even held hands with a woman), she didn't know which was funnier. "No, we weren't. We just went to see a movie together. Steve needed some cheering up." She glared. "But then he left me alone in the theater!"

Steve looked down. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have."

"Yea, you shouldn't have," Toni responded as she narrowed her eyes.

"And something tells me that she'll keep playing that card," Barnes stated with a wink.

Toni smiled at him. "Damn straight." Even when she was back in the future, she would still be playing that card on Captain Rogers. "Besides, I'm not mad. Just annoyed. You can't keep fighting guys who are bigger than you."

Steve looked at her, with those annoying puppy dog eyes (that he would deny). It was hard not to be mad at him looking at those puppy dog eyes. "You know-" He started but he was cut off by Barnes again.

"Let's talk about something cheery now," Barnes said as he offered his arm to Toni, who just stared at it. She wasn't one to take an offered arm, no matter how hot the guy was. "I was thinking we could go to the Stark Expo. I hear Howard Stark is unveiling something." He smiled and lowered his arm when Toni didn't take it.

_Yea, a failure,_ Toni thought. She remembered her father complaining about his failed hover car. "Unfortunately, I have to work," she lied. She had quit that job the day before as she no longer needed it. Barnes gave her a look as if he didn't believe her, but he never seemed to believe her. "You two should still go. It will be fun." There was also the fact that her father would be there and she had no interest in seeing him. "You two can probably find some hot dames there for the both of you," she said with a wink.

"Oh, Toni, I only have eyes for you," Barnes teased.

"Bucky, you're unbelievable," Steve stated, as he glanced at Toni.

Toni eyed Barnes, wondering if he was this flirtatious with all women or just her. Well, she was pretty different from the women of this time. For one, there was no way in hell that she would ever back down and listen to a man (or anyone), and she refused to let culture roles of this time rule her. She knew that would attract some man to her (as well as turn some away). "I'm really out of your league, Barnes," she stated with a smile.

"Are you sure?" Barnes responded, with a smirk.

"Damn sure."

With a small laugh, Barnes shook his head instead of responding back to that. "Well are we going to stay and talk in this alley all day along or are we going?" he asked.

"Yes, let's go," Steve replied back.

As soon as Barnes got some distance away, Toni grabbed Steve by his arm and pulled him back. This would be the last time that she saw any of them and she wanted to give Steve some words of advice. "Steve."

Steve glanced toward Barnes, who had stopped at the end of the alley. He eyed them but he didn't walk back to them. "Toni? Is this about me fighting again?" She had made it clear that she didn't like him fighting bigger, stronger man, who could easy kill him. "I can't just sit on the sidelines. You know this."

Toni stared at him, and she could see the Future Rogers in him. "I know that and I admire that about you," she said with a smile. He was clearly taken back from that. "I want you to keep trying. However, just be smart about it. Don't give up or I will have to beat you."

"And I have no doubt you can," he replied with a weak smile as he rubbed his shoulder.

She let out a small laugh. "It sounds corny, I know. Just don't give up, Steve."

"I won't."

"And don't forget to have some fun."

He laugh. "I will try."

"This include finding a nice girl, Steve."

Turning away from her, Steve let out a small groan. "What is it with you and trying to get me a dame?" he asked.

She didn't need to see his face to know it was deep red and that he was also annoyed at her. "Just have so fun."

He turned back to her. "I will try," he stated with a sigh.

Toni nodded and let him go. Barnes was still giving her a weird look, but she waved them off. "Go! Have fun. I'll be fine!" she yelled. She waited until they disappeared from her sight before she started back to the apartment for her supplies.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni stood outside of Stark Industries, wearing all black. She had a medium size black bag on her back, which held all of her tools. She watched from across the street as four black Chevrolet Carryall Suburbans pulled out of the compound. She knew her father, surrendered by his security team, was in one of those SUVs. There was no way she would be able to get the device if he kept it on him; however, it would be very stupid for him to have it on his person. The military considered the unnamed device a threat and Howard would not take a threat into the general public.

She waited a few minutes before crossing the street in the shadows. She ducked in a bush as she saw a guard come her away. She peaked her head out of the bushes once she couldn't hear the footstep. As she had seen one too many action movies, she rolled behind a tree in a ninja fashion and posed before the tree. She moved the leaves out of the way and looked out. When she thought the coast was clear, she crossed to the fence at the back of the facility that was rarely patrolled. Reaching into her bag, she grabbed a wire cutter.

Getting as close to the ground as she could, she cut out a small hole in the fence, just big enough for her to squeeze through. "Urgh," she uttered as she dragged herself through the sticky mud. She could feel the mud and leaves stick to her and feel the bugs crawling on her skin. Even though she wasn't a girly girl, she was never a fan of bugs, and right now, there was a spider on her face. She was fighting the urge to scream and freak out.

Once on the other side of the fence, Toni laid flat on the ground, trying to make herself as small as possible. A guard, that she was expecting, stepped a few feet from her. The guard, who was heavy armed, looked around, and after a few seconds, he walked away. Toni waited a few more seconds to make sure that he was gone before she pushed herself off the ground. It was then that she proceeded to quietly freak out.

After making sure that the spider was off her, she darted to the back door of the complex. She reached into her bag and pulled her homemade scanner. The lock wasn't fully computerized as it would require her to manually pick the lock. The lock, impressive for the time, was connected to the building security system, and any attempt to pick the lock would alert the guards and slam down an interior partition inside the lock, making it impossible to pick. However, she was the famous genius Toni Stark and there wasn't anything that she couldn't hack. Plus, she had the scanner, which could hack the system and create an interference so the system would not know it was being hacked.

She connected the scanner to the lock and allowed a few seconds to go by before she pulled put out her lock picking kit. She struggled at first to expose the inside of the lock, but once she was able to expose it, she was able to pick it with no trouble. Using all of her strength, she pushed open the heavy metal door. She plucked the scanner from the lock and allowed the door to shut behind her. It locked automatically, sealing her in. She glanced back realizing that she wouldn't be able to get out that way. It appeared to be a one way door that could only be unlooked by the outside. "Interesting," she muttered. It was a smart idea if she thought about it. It gave burglars a false hope.

She took a quick look around. There were a few doors along this hallway but each door was locked; however, there was nothing behind those doors that she wanted. Toni had seen the plans and had even been in this building before, which meant she knew her away round, even if she didn't know all of its secrets. She knew the most logical place that her father would be keeping her device and it would be farther in the building. However, the first thing that she needed to do was get to the control room.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

It took her longer than expected to get to the control room. Even with her father gone, there was more security than she expected. She had to duck and drive every few seconds to avoid being caught. She thought she could 'blend in' if she found some kind of a uniform to change into, but she hadn't seen one single woman in this place, which was hard to believe. Yes, Toni understood that there wouldn't be female guards but there were other positions… _Yes, like the secretary,_ she thought to herself annoyed.

Like she expected, the door to the control room was locked, but it couldn't keep her out. One, she was a fucken genius, and two, she knew all of the ins and outs of this place. She hooked the scanner up to the lock, which surprisingly was a keypad lock. It only took a few seconds before numbers appeared on the screen. She typed in the numbers and the door slid open.

Toni stepped in and closed the door behind her. In front of her was an empty room filled with 4 large monitors with images that changed every few seconds. From the floor to the ceiling, three walls were lined with large fat computer towers. She had forgotten how gigantic computers were in this time. Getting over her shook, she took a seat behind the monitors and eyed the keyboard, if she could call it that as it didn't even look like a keyboard. She plugged in her scanner, and she started to type away. She would need to be fast about this, because the guy who was supposed to be stationed here could be back at any second.

After running into a few setbacks, she had to give it to her father, but she didn't give up. She was going to best him, because she refused to be second to her father. She shifted through some more codes before finding the code that she wanted. Toni smiled evilly when she broke through the security wall and gained full access; however, the smile on her face did not last long. "Is that footsteps?" she asked herself, glancing back at the door. She could tell by the sound of the steps that they were getting closer. She needed to get this done now.

Using the radio frequency on her homemade scanner, she created a wireless link between the control system and her scanner, so she could tap the security feed while not in the room. As the footsteps were getting louder, she disguised the fact that the system was hacked, but she knew Howard would be able to figure it out in no time, however, that would be after she was gone.

Standing up, Toni unplugged her device and headed to the door. Just as she was to about to open the door, she heard someone typing in the code. Doing the only thing she could, she ran to the towers and tried to hide behind them. She didn't quite fit but it hid enough of her that no one would notice her in the shadows.

The Stark security guard cross to the monitors and sat. _I hope he doesn't stay long,_ she thought as she watched him. _Maybe, I can create an alarm somewhere._ She clicked through her scanner/hack, while trying to figure out a way to distract the man in front of her; however, while doing that, she did found the exact location of her unnamed device.

Studying the system, she decided to set off an alarm that the guard would investigate but nothing too large that would send anyone running. A large alarm would cause too much suspicion, which she couldn't have. She would never get out of here if she did. She didn't want a building lock down. She set off a door alarm on the other side of the building.

It was taking Toni longer than she wanted to get out the control room, which infuriated her. The longer it took her to get out, the less likely she would be able to escape. At first, she didn't think the guard would leave, but he was radioed away when another guard couldn't turn the alarm off.

It had taken her about 15 minutes to get out of the control room.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni's back was pressed firmly against the wall, trying to make herself invisible as two guards passed her. She held her breath as they came within a few feet from her. She could hold her own in a fair one-on-one fight, but she couldn't take both of them on at the same time; plus, it would also alert them that she was here. She didn't breathe again until they turned into a room and closed the door behind them.

Taking out the phone-turned scanner, she flipped through different security feeds, trying to figure out the best way to go. _That works,_ she thought as she noticed two empty corridors. She turned around and took off in that direction, knowing that she had to hurry while she kept an eye on the feed to make sure she stayed out of view of the cameras.

She smirked as she came across the room that held her device. She almost didn't believe it that she made it through the building without getting caught. She tried to open the door, but not to her surprise, the door was locked. There was nothing to hack and she would've to pick the lock the old fashion way. She got down on her knees and took out one of picks. Keeping an eye on video feed, she started to pick it. She twisted the metal shaft, but the lock didn't click. Instead, the tool slapped in her hand. "Fuck," she cursed.

Dropping the broken tool on the ground, she pulled a smaller instrument; however, she broke that one too. "Seriously?" she muttered. She couldn't believe she was having this much trouble picking the damn lock. She took out a half-diamond pick and tried again. "Shit," she cursed as she was hearing footsteps. She look down at the feed and swore. Someone was coming her away. She needed to pick this now.

Toni put her full attention on the lock as she needed to focus on it. "Calm down," she told herself, taking a deep breath. She shook her head fear that she might not pick it in time. However, a second later, she heard a click. Very quickly, she gathered her things and entered the room. Not even a moment later, a guard passed by the door. She could hear him stop outside the door, which freaked her out, but it wasn't long before she could breathe again. On the video feed, she watch him walk away.

Taking a deep breath, she took a single step away from the door and looked around the room. She looked down at the phone-turned-scanner and brought up the feed for the room. Without much effort, she put the video on a loop, so no one would know she was there. Putting the phone in her pocket, she crossed to a desk on the other side of the room. "There you are," she said, as she spotted her device. To her frustration and annoyance, her father had broken down her device, but she would be able to put it back together with no problem.

She took the bag from her back and set it on the table. After she packed up the unnamed device, she heard someone behind her. She internally cursed as she turned around; however, she cursed loudly when she saw a gun trained on her. After getting her annoyance and anger under control, she spoke, "Hello, Agent Carter. It has been a long time." She put on the biggest smile that she could muster.

"I knew you were trouble," was Peggy response.

"Well, I'm always trouble."

Peggy stepped closer. "You're not going to talk your away out of this."

Toni narrowed her eyes. "Honey, I can talk my way out of anything." She didn't know what it was, but her ego wouldn't let her shut up.

"You have broken into Stark Industries for a weapon."

"It isn't a weapon," Toni replied, bitterly. She would protest that until she was blue in the face. "And it's mine. How is it a crime to steal my own shit?"

Peggy kept the gun trained on Toni, but one of her hands dropped to her pocket and pulled out a pair of handcuffs. "You can explain it to Colonel Phillips." She took a few steps toward Toni. "Hold out your arms. I'm placing you under arrest."

Toni, who had no interest of making this easy, stuck her arm outs and took a few steps toward Peggy as if to allow her to handcuff her. Peggy eyed her, clearly not buying how easy Toni stuck her arms out, but she still proceeded to handcuff her. Toni winked as Peggy slapped the handcuff down on her left hand, but when she tried to do the same with the right, Toni yanked back her left arm startling Peggy, who stumbled forward. Using this for her advantage, she swung at Peggy's face.

To Toni's joy (she really didn't want to hurt Peggy), Peggy was able to dodge; however, Toni kept focused. Using this opening, Toni lifted her leg in the attempt to kick the gun out of Peggy's hand, and though she missed and hit Peggy's wrist, the gun still dropped from her hand. As soon as she heard the gun hit the floor, Toni launched herself at Peggy knowing damn sure that she wasn't a match for Agent Carter, but she had to try.

Peggy and Toni struggled on the floor as they were trying to overpower the other. The gun was a good foot away from them and no matter how hard Toni reached for the gun, she couldn't grasp it. "I just need the device! That's it," Toni protested as she tried to knock out the Agent.

"You have broken and entered into a highly classified division of a company, contracted by the US Government _and_ you are assaulting a Military officer," Peggy hissed in her command voice. "You will be arrested."

After struggling for a few minutes, Toni was able to touch the tip of the gun and work it toward her, which was a good thing as Peggy had been able to roll on top of her. She was about to knock Toni out when she noticed the gun pointed at her. "Now, get off," Toni ordered, knowing damn well that she couldn't shot this woman. There was also the fact that Toni wasn't really a good shot. She needed J.A.R.V.I.S. for that.

Peggy got off Toni slowly and backed away with her arms in the air. "You don't want to do that," Peggy pleased, looking straight into Toni's eyes as if she was ting to read her.

"Don't tell me what to do," Toni snapped annoyed. She hated when people told her what to do.

"Why don't you listen to Agent Carter?"

_Fuck,_ Toni cursed as it wasn't Peggy who had spoken. Turning around, Toni swore loudly. "Colonel Salty! How are you?" she asked with a fake smile.

"Drop the gun," Colonel Phillips ordered as he pointed his gun at Toni's head. He was not playing games.

Toni knew when she was trapped in a corner. Setting the gun on the floor, she turned to face Salty fully.

"Are you okay, Agent Carter?" the Colonel asked as he glanced back at Peggy. Toni did feel bad for Peggy's state, because she looked like shit. Her hair was out of place and her clothes were disheveled.

Peggy wiped the sweet from her forehead. Even though she was a mess, she was still composed. "I'm fine."

Phillips looked at Toni. "Then handcuff her and let's go."

Toni could do nothing but stand there as Peggy put the handcuff on her tightly and harshly pushed her forward.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni found herself in a familiar room, sitting in a familiar chair, as she was handcuffed to a familiar table. Besides her, Colonel Salt, who was sitting across from her, was the only one in the room. She had no doubt that Peggy and her annoying father were standing behind the glass watching her.

"You are in some serious trouble," Salty explained as he stared at her. There was a file in front of him and it contained everything about Toni, including the new charges against her.

"I was in serious trouble the day I was born," Toni stated, remembering the story that her mother had told her. A nurse had tried to steal her from the hospital the day she was born; her father's security had stopped her before the nurse could step out of the building. That wasn't the only kidnapping attempt Toni faced when she was a child. "This is nothing new for me."

"Do you not understand the trouble you're in?" Salt asked.

Salty had no clue to how much trouble she was in. "I do. It's you who don't know the trouble that I'm in." He didn't what she was talking about and it was written on his face. Taking a deep breath, she changed the subject. "You knew I would come for it tonight," she stated.

"You did make it clear that you wanted your device back," Phillips replied. "And I had you followed. Did you really think we wouldn't?" He looked down at the papers in front of him. "So tell me what this device does?" he asked as he stared down at a picture of it.

His statement about someone following her hit her like a ton of bricks. "That was your guy?" she asked shocked. She never expected his man to attack her. He could have killed her; he would've killed her if that mystery hero didn't jump in. "You had your man attack me?" she asked as she slammed her fists down on the table.

Though Salty didn't jump at her outburst, he was clearly startled at it. "What are you talking about?"

"Your guy attacked me in an alley. He slammed me against a wall," Toni yelled. She tried to stand but both of her arms were handcuffed to the table and she fall straight back. "I thought he was going to kill me."

He narrowed his eyes. "My soldier wouldn't have attacked you," Phillips retorted.

"Maybe, you don't know your 'soldier' all too well," Toni hissed, turning away from Phillips. She still had the mental scars from that attack.

Phillips glanced back at the darken glass as if to communicate to the person on the other side. "Are you sure this person was following you?" he asked, turning back to Toni. "It could've been a random mugging."

Toni snorted. "I know what it looks like when someone is following me and he was following me." Shaking her head, she took a deep breath. "He wanted to take me to his master," she stated, unsure if she should tell him that, but she decided that since it didn't have anything to do with the future, it was fine.

Phillips was eyeing her strangely. "He said his Master?"

She blew out slowly, as she thought of what she would do if she was in his situation. "It doesn't matter." She was beginning to believe that it wasn't his tail who had attacked her. But then who was Salty's tail? She didn't notice anyone else following her besides the creepy stalker. There was another question: who did the creepy stalker worked for? Who was this Master?

"It does matter," he said.

"I don't know anything about that," Toni said, smiling faintly. "It would do no good to talk about it." She didn't want to talk about it as she didn't want to relive it. "I have nothing to talk about." She stared off into space.

"We do have things to talk about. Now, will you talk or are you going to sit there in silence?"

Toni had thought about telling him the truth and she was going to tell him if she was caught, but now, she wasn't sure. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath.

"Sark, look at me," Phillips ordered.

Her eyes flew open and she glared at him. "What did you call me?" she hissed.

"It's your name, isn't?"

Toni had given that name as a cover up originally, and she had only given that name to one person: Barnes. She shook her head, because that wasn't possible. How could Barnes betray her to the Colonel? Did they even know each other? "Who told you that was my surname?"

"I think you're smart enough to know who?" he stated.

It seemed like it was Colonel's mission in life to piss her the hell off. "Why would Barnes tell you shit?" Granted he was really just a stranger to her, she couldn't take it if he was one of Salty's man.

"He's a soldier."

Yes, that was true, but it struck her to hear it from him. However, it made sense. She had wondered why he was nice so unexpectedly, and as she thought about it, she started to get pissed. If she ever saw him again, she was going to punch his lights out. He didn't care about her. All that flirting and comfort was a fucken lie. All of those hugs and smiles were a way to trick her. _Damn him._ This was why she never opened up to anyone, because no matter what, everyone was going to turn on her. _You shouldn't have let him in_. Trying not to think about it but failing, her mind went to Steve. Though not at this moment, Steve was a soldier as well, and he would follow any order to the end, including betraying her. That ate at her.

"He told me that you weren't go going with him and that Rogers Kid to the Stark Expo. He didn't believe you would try to steal back the device, but I knew you would." He shifted through the papers. "You are predictable."

Toni glared at the Colonel. "You don't know me."

He smiled, as they both knew he was getting to her. "But I do. I knew what you were going to do."

Taking a deep breath, Toni tried to calm herself down. She needed to think rationally and getting pissed wouldn't help her. "What do you want from me?" she asked.

Phillips looked at her. "I want to know why you were in that field and how these devices works." He placed two photos in front of her. One was of her unnamed device and the other was her reactor, which made her glance down at her chest. It wasn't visible through the black shirt she was wearing. "And I want to know who you are." He eyed her. "I don't believe Sark is your name."

He would be correct about that. "And you would just let me go after that?" she asked.

"No."

"Then why would I tell you anything?" she asked.

"Well, you can keep quiet and rot in a cell, or you can come clean."

"Either way, I'll rot in jail, so what is the point?"

"If you agree to help and work alongside Stark, you can work off your sentence." He paused. "You have a bright mind. Now imagine what you can do if you and Stark put your minds together."

Toni snorted, because she couldn't see herself working alongside her father; however, she couldn't rot in a cell. "I'll tell you everything in private."

He looked out at her, trying to see if she was telling the truth or not. "We are alone."

She let out a chuckle. "I am no fool. I know they are watching. I won't say anything until I know for sure we're alone," Toni said as she leaned forward on the table.

Salty stood and uncuffed her from the table; however, her hands were still cuffed together. He then pulled her up by her arm and dragged her out of the room roughly. She was winked in pain as he pulled her to the door a few feet down from the room they exited. He pulled the door open and pushed her in. He didn't close it. "Everyone out, now," he ordered.

Toni looked up and narrowed her eyes, as she knew they weren't alone. She watched as Peggy, Erskine, and to her annoyance, Howard, walked pass the Colonel to the door. They each gave him a look as they walked out of the room. Not even a second later, Phillips closed the door. "There. Now we're alone." Though she was not looking at him, she could feel his stare on her. "Speak."

She took a look around the room, trying to see if there was anything that could record their conversion. She didn't want to anyone to know what she was going to say. Seeing nothing, she turned to him. "My last name is not Sark."

"I figured."

"My name is Toni Stark." She didn't give her full first name as she hated her full name, and Salty really didn't need to know what Toni was short for. And if he wasn't stupid, he should have an idea of what it was.

Phillips narrowed his eyes as he looked her over. "Are you telling me you are related to Howard Stark?"

"He's my father."

He let out a loud laugh. "Your father? Can't come up with a better cover? Yes, you look a lot like Stark. I give you credit, but he's a little too young to be your father, don't you think? You could've said sister. That would've been more believable." He stepped toward her. "If you aren't going to truthful, I can just take you to your cell." He grabbed her arm again.

Toni tried to pull away but she couldn't break his grip. "I'm not from this time. I'm from the future. The year I'm from is 2013." She looked him in the eye, trying to show him that she wasn't lying.

"Really? Time travel? That's your story?" He started to drag her to the door.

"I can prove it!" She did her best to fight him but she was failing. She could only slow him.

"I think you're crazy."

"Erskine's going to pick Steve Rogers for the Super Soldier Project," she revealed, not knowing what else she could do. She knew she was risking everything, but she needed him to believe her.

Phillips stopped and looked at her. "How do you know about the Super Soldier Project?" he asked. He looked at her. "I didn't think you were a spy but now I do."

That wasn't what she wanted. "I'm Howard Stark's daughter and he's a part of the project. I know because he knows. He had told me about it."

"He wouldn't tell you anything" He looked her over. "And there's no way that Erskine would choose the asthmatic Rogers."

"He will, and he will be the only Super Soldier that Erskine will produce." Toni stared at him, knowing that she was saying too much already. She could already be risking the future.

The Colonel looked at her as if trying to read her. "Why should I believe you?"

"If I was lying, I would come up with a better lie. No one in their right mind would believe a time traveling story."

"This is true… but again, you could be saying this to make me believe you."

Toni tiled her heard, trying to make herself look cute and innocent. Pepper had accused her of using her cuteness to win fights, and Toni had always denied it; however, she would admit it here and use it. She needed to win this battle. "You know how smart Stark is. Do you think Stark Industries wouldn't be able to create a time machine?" She said, wording that carefully. She didn't want to give too many details away like the fact that her father was dead in her time.

"You say 2013?"

"Yes."

"Interesting."

"Does that mean you believe me?" she asked hopeful.

"No," Salty answered as he grabbed her and pulled her toward the door.

Toni started to freak out, because she couldn't stay in a cell for the rest of her life. She would go crazy. "You will kill the Super Soldier project." She had to find a way out of this.

He turned to her. "First, I don't believe anything that you are saying, and two, why would I kill the project? I fully support this program and as you say, it will produce."

She couldn't admit the reason why. "You will see," she said through her teeth.

"And you will sit in a cell until I do."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni wasn't sleeping, even though her eyes were closed. She was fully alert in her small cell, which she had been in for what seemed like weeks, but without any windows, she couldn't keep track of the days and the nights. Everything started to blend together. Every so often (Toni wasn't able to keep track of how often), an officer would bring water to her. She was feed twice a day, or what she thought was twice a day.

There were only two lights sources: her dim arc reactor and a light bulb on a wall outside of her cell, which looked like it was going to die. It was so unbearable hot that Toni thought she had sweated off a few pounds in the heat. A rock would have been more comfortable than the bed that she was sitting on.

Taking a deep breath, Toni opened her eyes as if she had heard something. She scanned the dark room, trying to see if anything was out there, but she couldn't make anything out in the darkness. She closed her eyes and leaned her head back, thinking about a new Iron Man Design. It was the suit that kept her sane. She thought about all the ways she could improve it. And if she wanted a break from the Iron Man armor, her mind would wander to the unnamed device and ways that she could power it.

However, would there a point? She was stuck in this cell, and there was no way she could get out unless someone let her out. Was it worth it to try to escape? The colonel had already proven that she was predictable and he knew what she would do. If she did get pass Salty, how would she get back to the future? She had no idea of how her device even sent her to the past.

To be honest, it would be safer for the future if she stayed in the cell. She would do less damage in here than anywhere else.

"You look so defeated."

Toni's eyes flew open and she glanced around the cell. "Who's there?" she asked, annoyed at the sound of her own voice. It sounded as if there was a frog in her throat. In the corner, she would see a shape take form. "Come out!"

Out of the shadows came Loki, who looked like crap. His hair was a mess and his holey clothes weren't fancy as she remembered. She was having a hard time believing that he would wear rags. "Long time no see, Stark?" he teased.

She narrowed her eyes at him before jumping to her feet. "Why the hell are you here?" she asked as she stepped toward him. He was the last person she wanted to see. "Why aren't you in a cell?" Her body hurt.

Chuckling, Loki looked around. "I am in a cell," he stated with a smile.

"You know what I mean!" she stated as she reached for the collar of his shirt. She was going to punch him, which he so deserved. He killed so many in his attack on New York City. "What the hell!" she yelled as her hand went through him.

He looked into her eyes. "I am still in Asgard with Thor." He said it with such a distaste that she thought the room would catch fire.

"So how are you here?" she asked, eyeing the god who was only a shadow of his former self. He wasn't the one to help without a reason, and she doubted it was to help her. Sure, she was sexy as hell and could get any man to drool at her feet, but she doubted Loki really wanted to drool at her feet and woo her. Seriously, what was his reason?

"The Avengers are worried about their missing member. They seem to want you back."

"Well, how could they live without me?" she said with a wink. "I'm brilliant."

He chuckled at her. "Such an ego on you, human."

"But still, they sent you to find me?" She snorted, ignoring his insult.

"Well, I am the only one who could." He took a step toward her. If he was whole, their chests would be touching. "And I wouldn't miss an opportunity to see such a beauty." His smile weirded her out. "You know, once we get out of our respected cells, we should make the beast with two backs."

Toni's eye started to twitch. "Did you just bring Shakespeare into this?"

His smile took up half of his face. "So you agree?"

She shuddered just thinking about it. "First of all, there's no way in hell that Thor will ever let you out of that cell. Two, I'm stuck in the past, and three, there's no way in hell that I would even consider sleeping with you, asshole. You are not worthy of this body."

"I think Thor fell for the wrong human."

Toni took a step back and turned to face the wall because she didn't want to talk about this subject with Loki. Granted having sex with a god (not that Loki could really be called a god) would be quite an experience, she would not to sleep with a mass murderer. "I doubt Thor sent you back to talk to me about your sex life and his choice in a girlfriend."

"I know how to get you back."

She turned back to him. "I know how to get back."

"Yes, yes, your device. I know how to power it. I know how to make it go forward." Loki stepped closer to her. He reached out a hand to touch her.

Without thinking, Toni went to hit his hand away but her hand went through. She glared at her inability to hit him. "Then tell me and go."

With a disgusting look in his eyes, he responded, "You must give me something in return."

"I thought Thor sent you back to help me. Why must I promise anything to you?" she snapped. She wouldn't give this murderer anything besides a bullet to the head.

"I didn't do this out of the goodness of my heart."

Toni snorted. "There is no goodness in your heart."

Being annoying as ever, he pretended that she shot him in the heart. "You hurt me, Stark." He smiled at her. "I thought we could be friends." Her eye twitched. "But Thor can't give me what I want," he revealed.

"I would assume that you would want out of that cell sooner, which is something that Thor can give you." Loki stepped closer to her, which forced her to take a step back. She wasn't sure why she even bothered to take a step back as he couldn't even touch her. He wasn't really here.

"This is true but it was only enough to get me here, but to get you home, you need to sweeten the deal."

"I don't have anything that you want," Toni said, pissed and annoyed.

"You can't give it to me now, but when you get back to the future, you can give me what I want."

"Which is?" she asked. "I won't help you breakout or help you commit any crimes."

Loki took another step toward her. "What I want isn't a crime."

Glaring at him, Toni cursed as her back collided with the cell wall. She wasn't able to move any farther from him. "Then what is it?"

"I will not tell you yet. Swear to me that you will give it to me and I will get you _home_."

She really didn't like how he said the word home. He had no idea of what home was. "Why would I promise you anything? And why would I especially promise you something when I'm not sure what it is that I am promising?" He wasn't being forthcoming and she wasn't stupid. He knew if she knew what he wanted, she wouldn't give him shit.

"You want out?"

"Not with the way you're promising. Now get out!" She was done talking to him.

He turned away but Toni could tell that he was still smiling. "I'll be back and then you'll be promising me anything that I want, just to get out of here."

"No chance in hell!"

"I think-"

"What the hell is going on?" A guard asked, drawing Toni's focus. He was down the hall. She knew Loki and she had been talking loudly; it must've attracted some unwanted attention.

"Nothing," she hoarsely answered back. As she didn't hear anything else from the guard, Toni turned back to the shadows that Loki had been standing in, but he was no longer there, leaving her alone again. Though she would never admit it, she was sad that he was gone, solely for the fact that she had been alone in this cell for far too long. She was forgetting what it was like to have a conversion with someone.

She turned back to the bed and took her normal spot; however, it wasn't long before she was disturbed again. This time it was by the Colonel, who looked like he was hit by a bus. If he hadn't had thrown her in a cell, she would've been worried about him.

"Can I help you, Salty?" she asked, looking over at him.

His eye twitched at the nickname. "Dr. Erskine is dead," he stated as he stepped to the bars of her cell. A key dangled in his hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to reached a certain point in the story and this I hope this chapter didn't feel rush, like I was moving too fast. :) However, the fun can start now. Haha.
> 
> I also hope that Loki doesn't seem too OOC. This is why I avoided Thor so far in the story.
> 
> Anyhow, Hoped you enjoyed this chapter!


	14. The Engineer's Wrench

"So you believe me now?" Toni asked as she narrowed her eyes at the stupid Colonel. Though she was glad that he did believe her, this was not how she wanted it. She took a deep breath, but Erskine was going to die no matter and nothing could've changed that.

Phillips, who was sitting across from her, eyed her; he was trying to read her. "I still have my doubts, but-"

Toni glared. "Then why am I here? You should-"

"- _But_ I'm starting to believe you," he stated, interrupting her. "I want to keep an eye on you." He opened up the file in front of him and skimmed it over before sliding it toward Toni. "You rotting in a cell won't help anyone."

She glanced down at the file. Without actually looking at it, she could tell it was about her as she saw her face staring up at her. "What's this?" she asked.

The Colonel stood up and crossed to the window. Unlike the last time they talked, they were in a small office that had a window facing the outside. "In order to keep an eye on you, I need you close and this is how I'm going to do so." He turned back to her with a smile. "It means you have to listen to me."

"I don't know what's in this file, but I won't listen to _anyone_ ," she stated. "What makes you think I will? Me and authority don't get along." She let out a chuckle as she thought about all of the times Rogers tried to tell her what to do.

"You'll have if you want to get _home_ ," he stated, putting stress on the word home.

Toni narrowed her eyes as she picked up the file. She let out a loud pitch laugh as she read it, because it was the funniest shit on the planet. It had her listed as a solder in the Army. "A Corporal? Really?" She couldn't keep the laugher in. "Why can't I be a Captain? No fair, Salty," she teased as she stuck out her tongue.

His eye twitched at the sound of the nickname. "You're lucky you're even that. I could've made you a private, but if you're going to be around my men, I want, rather need, you to be of a higher rank. These men hadn't been around a woman in a long time, and a slightly higher rank might be able to discourage them from trying something."

She stopped laughing for a second and glared. "Wait, what?" She paused. "Try what?"

He looked at her and laughed before he became deadly silent. "Though, they might not respect a woman Corporal," he stated very seriously. "There aren't women Corporals."

Toni's eye was still twitching. "I can take care of myself," she replied. She had heard of military women getting harassed in her time, but she could imagine that it was worse now. It scared her a bit to think about it; however, she wasn't going to let it get to her. Men were like dogs; if they smelled fear, they would attack.

"You say this now, but this won't be like anything you're used to," he stated as he stepped to a desk in the corner of the room. He opened a drawer and pulled something out. Toni eyed him curiously, but she did not say anything. "Here are some uniforms for you." He set them down in front of her.

She glanced at the items. "Please tell me I don't have to wear a skirt, as I refused." There were a few things she could put up with, but she wouldn't wear a skirt. Yes, she had worn skirts and dresses before, but that was different. This was the army.

Salty let out a laugh. "I knew you would say that," he chuckled as he glanced her over.

She was still wearing the black outfit that she had worn when she had snuck into Stark industries. For being in a cell for a few weeks, she didn't look all that bad, but she looked tired and worn out. "Well, it's hard to build an engine or a generator when wearing a skirt. Have you try to bend down while wearing a dress? It's the most awkward thing on the planet!" She paused and thought about her statement. "No, wait. I take that bad. That's the second most awkward thing on the planet. Me trying to play wingman to Steve Rogers is the most awkward thing on the planet." She let out a painful chuckle. "He can't even talk to a woman without breaking out in a cold sweat."

"You're so a Stark." He let out a sighing laugh as he shook his head.

Toni smiled. "I try." Though she did not like it, she was a lot like her good for nothing father. No, she did _NOT_ have father issues and she would beat the asshole, who said she did.

"Back to what we were talking about," the Colonel stated. "When the need calls for it, you'll have to wear the dress uniform which does have a skirt, but around the base, you can wear pants."

Her eye twitched. "I guess I'll have to work with that, Salty."

"I hate when you call me that," he said bitterly.

"Well, too bad."

He put on a smirk. "Once you get dressed, report to Agent Carter. You two will be spending lots of time together, as she'll be keeping an eye on you."

Though she liked Peggy, it worried her. "Is that a good idea, Salty?" His eye twitched at the name. "I did almost shoot her the last time we met."

"You underestimate her; there's no way that you could've shoot her. She isn't one of our top agents for nothing. The cadets learned that the hard way during boot camp."

Toni snickered, knowing Peggy. Even with a hand tied behind her back, Peggy could still take her. "Well, I'm a lousy shot, but I can still put up a good fight."

He looked at her. "I doubt an engineer can win a fight against a trained solder."

"HEY! You should never count out a Stark," she countered. Though she wouldn't tell him that about the Iron Man Suit, she had the urge to bring it up, so he wouldn't think of her as defenseless. Even with her self-defense classes, she wasn't the strongest person around, but she could defend herself just as well, if not better, than most. "And there's nothing wrong with an engineer."

Phillips let out a chuckle. "Put on the dress uniform until we get to base."

Her eye twitched. "But I don't wanna."

"Just do, Corporal."

At hearing that, her whole situation came crashing down on her. All jokes aside, she was in a very tricky spot, and there was a chance that she wouldn't be able to get back. She might be suck as a fucken Corporal for the rest of her life, and she didn't want to be a fucken Corporal. She wanted to be in her lab, inventing shit, as Pepper ran her company. She did not want to listen to some asshat, telling her what to do. It went against her very nature, her very core. _Maybe, I should take Loki's deal,_ she thought; however, that thought didn't last too long. There was no way she could take anything that he was giving.

"Are you okay, Sark?" he asked, pulling her out of her thoughts.

"Sark?"

"It's the name you gave Barnes. It would make sense to keep it."

"I guess," she stated, not really liking the name. She wanted her name, and there was no way in hell that she would give up her name by choice. If she ever got married (no chance in hell she would), her spouse would take her last name. That was not up for debate.

The Colonel's eyebrow rose at the sound of her depressed voice. "I have to hurry this along."

Toni exhaled slowly as she stood up and reached for the uniforms on the table. "How's Rogers?" she asked.

"Rogers appears well. He seemed to have gotten along with Peggy well. Too well if you ask me." He shook his head as he crossed to the door. There was a pause as he looked at her. "I do not care to know if I'm being honest. He's off being America's show boy," he answered, walking to the door.

She tried to work out what she was feeling. She had known that the Shrimp had a thing for Peggy, though she was unsure of what that thing really was, but hearing it from Salty annoyed her. She wasn't sure why, but she didn't want to think too much on it. It shouldn't matter what they were anyway.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

As it was unclear to how long she was in the cell, she was glad to take a shower. She felt so dirty and disgusting, and she hated feeling like that. Unlike a regular woman, she didn't care if she took a shower every day; however, she refused to be dirty and smelly.

After a scrubbing herself three times to make sure she was cleaned, Toni turned off the shower and walked to a bench located a foot outside of the communal shower area. Alone in the locker room, she took her time getting her towel. After a few seconds of being completely naked, she wrapped the towel around her body and stepped toward a mirror. She dropped the towel slightly as she stared at her small form. She had lost a few pounds and she could see her some of her rips. Her current state reminded her of her condition when she was rescued in the desert. Her stomach growled taking her out of her thoughts. She needed to eat something, because she was exhausted just by standing there. However, she was unable to look away from her small frame.

While one hand held up the towel, the other traced the dim arc reactor. She was tempted to take it out and fix it, but she didn't have the right tools and she wasn't in the right location. She didn't need to faint while naked. That would be a very awkward, because at this time, her father would be the only hope that she had if the reactor failed, and she didn't want her father to see her naked, especially when he didn't know she was his daughter. Knowing her father, he would flirt and that would be… _Ew!_ Toni shook her head. It would be embarrassing and mortifying to say the least.

Pressing her hand against the reactor, she took a deep breath. She couldn't stare at her naked self forever, but she didn't have any interesting in facing the world. Why couldn't she stay in the locker room? Shaking her head, she knew she couldn't and it would be stupid to think about it. Trying to force herself to a happier place, she turned to the uniforms that Salty had given her. With the towel wrapped around her tightly, she unfolded the uniform and laid them in front of her. She groaned at the hideous standard undergarments that the military provided. How could anyone feel any kind of sexy in this uniform? Toni sighed because she was being foolish as sex had no part in war.

After putting on the white undergarments, she slipped her arms through the off-white blouse and buttoned it. Before putting on the skirt, she put on a slip, an article of clothing she didn't understand the point of. After tucking her blouse in the skirt, she took a seat and put on a pair of kitten heels, another article she didn't understand. Standing up, she wandered back to the mirror and glared at her reflection.

Though she knew how sexy they made her legs look, Toni hated heels and never understand why anyone would want to wear them. They were the most uncomfortable things on the planet to walk in and it didn't matter what kind of heels Peppers brought her. However, there were two reasons why she wore them: Pepper made her or to get laid as men loved a woman in heels. She groaned, because Pepper wasn't here and she definitely wasn't getting laid. What was the point of heels if she wasn't trying to flirt the pants off someone? Exhaling slowly, she pulled on the itchy military jacket, which felt like it weighed 50 pounds. How could anyone wear this shit? She couldn't wait until she could take this off.

Her eye wandered to the sleeves of jacket and glared at the Corporal symbol. She didn't know how that was going to work, but it would be difficult as she wasn't one to listen without a fight, which was why she and Future Rogers didn't get along. He, like others, wanted her to listen without questions and that wasn't her. She had to ask questions; it was her nature.

Toni stepped away from the mirror to a duffle, and after making sure it was packed, she headed to the door. She had to meet Peggy, but she didn't have to go too far to find her as the agent was waiting outside the room. A few feet down, Peggy, who sported a frown, was leaning against the wall. _Urgh,_ she thought as she took a few steps toward her. She hated when Peggy was upset. "Hello, Agent," she stated as she held the bag over her shoulder.

"The glow is covered." She glanced down at Toni's chest.

"I figured Salty wouldn't want it visible."

"No, he wouldn't." Peggy pushed herself off the wall and looked Toni over. "Was that why you were in there awhile?"

"Well, I hadn't taken a shower in a while as I was rotting in a cell," she explained with a smile. A second later, she felt her stomach rumble in hunger again.

"A well deserve cell."

Toni's eye twitched. Though she wasn't sure what Phillips told Peggy, she knew it wasn't much, that she was working on limited information. She had a reason to be harsh as Toni could be a spy for all she knew. "It was a misunderstanding," she replied. She needed to change the subject. "Can we get something to eat? I got to feed the beast."

Peggy raised her eyebrow. "Are you under the impression that you are the 'beast'?"

"Are you saying that I'm not?" she asked, smirking. Shaking her head, Peggy didn't respond and turned away. "O', you are no fun," Toni joked as she followed after her. Thanks to the stupid heels and being out of shape due to the long prison stay, she was having a hard time keeping up.

"We do not have time for fun."

"There's always time for fun." Peggy glanced back at her, annoyance present on her face. It was weird to be hated by her as Peggy had been her life line when she was younger. Whenever Toni needed to talk or cry something out, she went to Peggy, who would always listen no matter what even if it was two in the morning. "So where are you taking me?" she asked, knowing she better change the subject again.

"A quick bite to eat and then we are off to London," she answered, very bitterly. "I assume you know you're coming with us? The Colonel wants to keep an eye on you."

"I know," she replied, trying to keep up. Peggy was walking too fast for her, and it annoyed Toni. There was no doubt that Peggy knew she was having a hard time keeping up and was doing it on purpose. It irritated Toni and she wanted to say something, though she doubted that Peggy would slow down if asked. There had to be another way to make her stop. "So do you like Rogers?" she asked, knowing it would piss her off. It also bugged Toni that Peggy and Steve were close. _This isn't surprising, but why do you care?_ She asked herself. _It's for the best_.

The Agent stopped and turned on a dime. "Corporal Sark, that's none of your concern."

"Ouch, did he turn you down?" It would take Toni some time to get used to being called that.

Carter was glaring at her. "I think you're jealous."

Toni laughed, because it was completely ridicules. How could she like the asshole Captain Rogers? She couldn't even stand him. Though the shrimp Steve was sweet, he was Captain America now, which made him an ass. "I think you're crazy," she replied. "Why would I like him?"

Peggy took a deep breath before she started to walk away. "You brought him up." There was a long silence pause. "We do not have time to talk."

It annoyed Toni that Peggy was able to get to her. "Fine."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

After the awkward bite with Peggy who glared at Toni the whole time, they boarded a plane. Toni had been on quite a few military planes before but she had never been on a plane this old. _It isn't old_ , she told herself. For the time, it was highly advance and there was no safer plane; however, she still did not like it. The only aircrafts she trusted were her own as none could compare.

"Scared?"

Twitching, Toni turned and glared at Agent Carter, who had followed behind her on the plane. "I was just deciding where to sit," she stated. _So this is how it's going to be?_ Toni thought to herself. She was okay with that, because she didn't want to befriend anyone, though it was already too late. She had already befriended Steve- no Rogers. As he was the Captain now, he was Rogers again to her. She had also befriended Barnes, but that was a lie as he had betrayed her to Salty. That still blew her mind.

"This plane is one of the safest plane you can be on," Peggy stated.

Toni narrowed her eyes, because it was that mindset that brought planes and ships down. Fury's beloved heliocraft would have gone down if it wasn't for her actions. "I said I wasn't scared. No need to try to baby me."

"I'm your baby sitter." Annoyance was present in her voice.

Toni couldn't keep the laugher down, because Peggy was her babysitter for much of her early life.

Peggy raised an eye brow. "What's so funny?"

Shaking her head, Toni didn't answer and walked away to find a seat. As she walked toward the front of the massive plane, she noticed a few stares, which she didn't like. It appeared that Phillip had been right, but she wasn't going to let that get to her. Speaking of the man, she spotted him near the front, and deciding it would be best to sit close to him, she made her way toward him. As she neared, Salty glanced up. "Colonel," she greeted as she took a seat next to him. She glimpsed down the plane toward Peggy, who was walking toward them in a slow pace.

"Sark," he stated. "Are you going to stop calling me Salty?" He eyed her. "I don't need my men to hear that."

She let out a small chuckle. "Not a chance, Salty." she smiled. "So where's my device?" she asked as she buckled herself in tightly. However, if the plane was to fall from the sky, a seatbelt would not save her.

He looked around to see if anyone was in earshot. "Your father has it."

Her eye twitched at the word, father. "Am I going to get it back?" she asked annoyed. Why did he have to use the word father? Just thinking about Howard made her blood boil.

"Once we touched down, Stark, who is waiting for us in London, will hand over the device and he will supervise you."

"I don't need a babysitter," she protested. She was referring to both Peggy and Howard. "And don't you think that could mess up the whole timeline?" she whispered. "Is this about not trusting me?" There was also the fact that she couldn't stand to be in the same room of her father; however, she wondered if the world could take so much genius in the same room. She couldn't deny the intelligence of her father.

"Don't take it personally. I don't trust anyone," he stated.

"Well, I-" Toni started.

"Colonel," Peggy greeted, interrupting. She took a seat across from Salty and Toni. Her glare had changed to a smug look.

"Agent," Phillips replied. "Have you two been getting along?"

"Yup, we're best friends," Toni responded. She could feel his eyes on her, and she did her best not to pay any attention. "We're already giggling about nails and boys."

"I doubt that," he replied as he turned back to Peggy, who let out a sigh. Everyone knew Toni wasn't going to be easy.

"We don't need to be friends," Peggy replied. "It's not my job to friendly." This was where Toni toned them out.

Old Salty had said something to the sassy Agent, but Toni wasn't paying attention. At this moment, anything that came out of Peggy's mouth annoyed her. However, it did make her laugh, because somehow, she was friends with Rogers and 'enemies' with Peggy, when it was the opposite in the future. What was going on to make her consider Rogers a friend over Peggy?

Still toning them out, Toni glanced at Salty and Sassy from the corner of her eyes. What they said didn't matter, because the only thing that did matter was her damn device that her father had. The longer he had it the more chances he had to ruin it, but it didn't matter when she got the device back as she would have to work with her father.

The very idea of working with her father annoyed the hell out of her. How could she work with someone like him? He couldn't see pass his big ego, but then again, there were _other_ reasons why she hated her father. He basically abandoned her to nannies, as he didn't have time for her. Yes, she was still bitter about it. Sure, she grew up fine (some would probably disagree on that like the asshole Future Rogers), but it wasn't the same. Though she didn't play as a child, she had seen other fathers with their children and she had desired to have that same relationship.

"Sark."

Though the child genius needed special care, it wasn't fair that was all she got. She was treated with gloves and wasn't even allowed to have fun when she was a child as her father didn't deemed it necessary. He felt it would do more harm than good, but he was wrong. She wished could tell him that, but she was never able to. She was a chicken when it came to speaking her mind to her father.

"Sark. Sark!"

Toni jumped and glanced toward Phillips who had been calling her name. "Talking to me?" she asked, as she glanced toward Peggy, who was staring at her.

"I was calling your name, Corporal," Phillips answered.

"Were you?" Toni asked. "I wasn't paying attention."

"Clearly," Peggy muttered.

Phillips glimpsed at Peggy. "I see you two might have an issue getting along. If you two can't control yourselves, I'll step in and if I have to, it won't be pretty. I cannot allow this on the battlefield."

Toni glanced toward Peggy before leaning back and looking up at the roof of the plane. "I will behave," she said as her _fall_ flashed before her eyes. "Though, I have an issue listening to authority, Salty."

"I can tell," Phillips stated, annoyed.

Toni can see Peggy wanted to say something, but she was refraining. Unlike her, Agent Carter could keep silence and listen, even if she didn't want to.

She closed her eyes and allowed her mind to drift. During her daydreaming, the plane had taken off and was currently over the ocean. She could hear the wind violently and ferociously strike the plane as it flew through the ruff air. She took a deep breath as they went through a bumpy patch. Lately, she hadn't been a fan of flying unless she was the one piloting. Her _fall_ kept replaying in her head.

"Are you okay, Sark?" Peggy asked.

Toni didn't open her eyes. "I'm fine, Agent Carter," she stated. Her voice was shaky and she hoped no one noticed.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni looked around at Howard Stark's lab away from home. For being a make shift lab in a middle of a military base, it was pretty decent, and she was impressed by that; however, she should've expected this. Her father only liked working with the best and the top of the line items, and he refused to work with anything less. In those regards, he was pretty much like her, but he was a bigger asshole than she. She, at least, could carry on a conversion unlike him.

Still wearing the annoying dress uniform, Toni paced the room as she waited for her stupid father, who made her very nervous. Could she impress him? Or would he be disappointed in her like always? She betted the later as she had never made him proud. Why did she care anyways? She shouldn't care what he thought about her.

With each passing second, she was getting angrier. Though being a Stark made her who she was, she wondered what it would have been like if she wasn't raised by an ass, who was hardly around in the first place. Seriously, he liked to pawn her off whenever he could. No, she _didn't_ have daddy issues!

Toni glanced around the lab that Peggy had dropped her in a short while ago, having important things to do that she didn't want Toni to know about. She had talked generically in front of her without revealing any details as she eyed Toni. It made her feel like child, which infuriated her, but she didn't say anything or even react to it liked she wanted to. If she wanted to earn their trust and get her damn device back, she had to listen and behave, which would be difficult.

She took a seat at one of the tables in the lab as she eyed the only door into the room. It would be the only way into the room and she didn't want Howard to get the surprise on her. Out of habit, her hands reached for the closest thing: a crescent wrench, and started to mindlessly play with it. The wrench was cold in her hand and it felt nice as the room was warm. She couldn't understand why it was so hot in here. Should it be colder with all of his equipment?

Shaking her head, she took a deep breath and held it for a few seconds. Exhaling slowly, she kicked the heels off her feet and stretched out her legs. "Stupid heels," she muttered. Holding up her legs, she glanced down to her feet.

"I think heels make a woman's legs look sexy."

Recognizing the voice, Toni glanced up with a glare. "Mr. Stark," she greeted, trying to keep back her anger.

He smiled at her with an annoying grin. "We meet again." Toni raised her eyebrow. "I guess… the first time didn't count as you were unconscious."

It kind of creeped her out that he had visited her when she was sleeping. She took a deep breath to relax herself. "Where's my device?" she asked, not wanting to stretch this out. She thought she could keep her cool, but seeing his sorry smug face set her off…again.

Howard lifted up a metal suitcase that he was holding. "So what does this do that you want it so badly?" he asked as he set the case down on the table that Toni was sitting.

"Wouldn't you like to know," she responded, sitting up. She lean forward as if to grab to the case, but her hands stopped short. It was dead bolted and there was no way she could open it.

"I would." He paused. "I would also like to know how you got into my lab. My security is top notch."

"I don't know if I would say top notch if a petite woman got in." Toni let out a chuckle, because she liked how annoyed he was by it. "What did Colonel Salty tell you about me?" she asked, wondering what lie he told them.

Howard took a key out of his pocket and slid it to Toni, who scooped it up immediately. "Don't worry about it. Just know you'll be spending lots of time with me, which makes you the luckiest lady on the planet. Lots of women would love that chance."

Her eye started twitching as he winked at her. "You're ridiculous, you know that?" she snapped as she stood. "Why in hell would anyone want to be with you?" She unlocked the suitcase and slid her device out.

He eyed her. "I heard you didn't like me. Can I ask why?" He paused as she didn't answer him. After a long silence, he spoke, "I'll change that as no one can hate this smile."

"I can." Toni, glaring, looked up and studied him. This man was different than the man, who raised her, and it pissed her off. "I have no interest in making friends."

"Well, that's no fun," he stated as he stepped toward her and leaned against the table a foot away from her.

"War shouldn't be fun."

Howard looked at her. "I didn't say it was."

She didn't respond as the sight of her broken down device infuriated her. "Why did you take it apart?" she snapped. It also appeared that he tried to put it back together.

"To see how it worked."

"Did it work?" she asked, as she picked up the device and moved to a different table.

He left out a chuckle. "I think you know the answer to that," he said as he followed after her. "You know it might be best to put on shoes when walking around the lab. We don't need a pretty dame getting hurt."

"Don't make me hurt you." Toni glanced down at her feet before looking over her should. "And you don't need to hoover." Why did people keep calling her a dame? She hated that word.

"Hostile," he muttered as he raised his hands up in defeat. "I'll leave you be." He stepped away from her and crossed to a separate table.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

The next week or so, Toni did her best not to acknowledge Howard whenever he talked to her, which was harder said than done. Everything out of his mouth annoyed Toni, who wanted to snap back a witty nasty comment to everything he said, but she forced her mouth shut. There were points that she made her lips bleed as she bit down too hard. She knew she was being stupid and she should give him a chance, but she kept flashing back to her childhood and how she could never make him happy.

To be honest, it was weird to see him like this, and she didn't know how to act around him. She was able to see he wasn't a total asshole that was if she put her anger aside for a second. Though his ego was the most annoying thing on the planet, he was relatedly nice to the people around him and, for the most part, he was approachable. However, that did not mean she would change her outlook of him.

Shaking her head, she glanced over her shoulder at Howard, who was working on something. At his sides were a couple of lab techs in lab coats. He was working on something that Toni didn't know anything about. Yes, he probably would've told her if she asked, but she didn't want to know. She watched as Howard spoke to his techs, pointing at some of the tools on the walls. His laugher broke across the room at something that one of the techs said in response. Howard patted him on the back and told him something, which Toni couldn't quite make out from this distance. She eyed her father as he returned to the welder in front of him.

Toni took a deep breath and turned to her device, which she had put back together. After replacing most of the wires, it hadn't take much to get her device back in working order, well back to where she had before. It still bit when she tried to power it. She reached for a small generator on the table and pulled it toward her, thinking whether she should try or not. As it would just spit it back out, it would be stupid to try. She pushed the generator away and grabbed a small wrench. After taking off the metal casing, she pushed the wires out of the way and partly pulled out the motherboard.

While glancing toward her father (who was a horrible supervisor), she pulled out her smart phone, which she had repurposed again. It had taken some time to convince Salty to give it back, but she was able to sweet talk him. Similar to before, it was a scanner and she could do a full diagnostic on any device. Though it wouldn't be as thorough as if Jarvis did it, it gave her some idea of what was wrong with it. Yes, the purpose of the device was to suck power, but it wasn't supposed to spit it back out with so much force.

_Maybe, it's that spit back that I want,_ Toni thought as she remembered what happened in her own lab. However, if she was able to power it, it would either kill her or send her farther back in time, and she didn't want either of those things. She needed to find a way to control the device, but first thing first, she had to find a power source.

Just as Toni was about to disconnect the motherboard from the device, it somehow sent a shockwave through her arm without even being connected to a power source. "FUCK," she screamed as she dropped what she was holding. She cradled her right hand close to her chest as she rocked. She couldn't feel her arm, which didn't scare her too much. Her frustration of being bested by her own damn device was overshadowing the shocking pain. Why couldn't she fix it?

She jumped at a hand on her shoulder. "Are you okay?" Howard asked as he kneed down in front of Toni. "I have one of the techs getting a doctor. Let me see your hand."

Toni eyed his hand on her shoulder. "I'm fine," she said through her teeth. Seeing, hearing him like this reminded her of the times before her mother's death.

"Something tells me you're lying," Howard joked as he stood up. He pushed the table away from Toni, so he could knee down in front of her. "I have been bitten by that device. I know how much pain you're in."

She held her arm tighter. "I bet."

"I can help you with this. I'm not sure what you're trying to do, but I don't own Stark industries for nothing."

Toni narrowed her eyes at him. She could have said the same thing, but she didn't. She also didn't tell him that she handed the control of the company to her secretary. "I can do this on my own."

"I'm supposed to supervise you for a reason."

"And you did a piss poor job of it," she replied. "I don't need your help anyways."

Howard let out a chuckle. "You're something else." He went to grab her arm to look at it, when he was pushed out of the way.

When Toni looked back, there in Howard's place stood a military doctor. "I don't need a doctor," she stated as she reluctantly allowed the doctor to take her arm. She bit down on her lip as he extended her arm.

The Doctor looked up at her face and he could see the pain written on it. "Corporal, the shock has numbed your arm. You should gain the feeling back in your arm in a few hours. Do you want a sling?"

"No, I don't," she stated as she tried to pull her arm back and failed. She tried not to pay any attention to the word 'should.' "Thanks." She eyed her arm and the growing blisters, forming on it.

The Doctor reached into his bag and pulled out a gauze and medical type. "Hold still." Finding some burn cream, he applied it to her skin before wrapping her arm in the white gauze. After making sure it was typed properly, he let go of her arm, stood, and headed to the door. "Just keep it dry for a few days."

"I got it," Toni replied as he watched the Doctor leave. Taking a deep breath, she held her arm against her chest and closed her eyes. Howard must've waved his techs away as she heard two additional people leave the room.

"Are you sure you're okay, Toni?" Howard asked as he stepped to the device.

She opened her eyes slowly. "It's just a flesh wound," she stated as she stood up. She looked toward the door and was greeted by the sight of Colonel Phillips. "Hello, Salty."

The Colonel took a deep breath. "My name is not salty."

"I don't think she's going to stop calling you that, Colonel," Howard stated as he placed her device back into the metal suitcase. Both Toni, with a glare, and Phillips watched as he did this.

"You don't have to put it away. I can still work on it," Toni spoke as he watched him shut the case.

Howard took a deep breath. "You're hurt. Take the rest of the day off. Put your sexy legs up. A Lady does not need to work this hard."

It irked her to hear him say that. Was that why he didn't love her? Was that why she couldn't make him proud? Was it because he wanted a son? A son to carry on his legacy? Was this why he and Rogers got along? Did he consider the Captain a better legacy than she? "You better watch your mouth," she hissed.

Phillips stepped toward. "Easy, Sark," he stated as he grabbed hold of her shoulder. "Though he should reframe form making absurd comments, he meant no harm."

"The hell he did," she stated. It was always when someone meant no harm did he caused the most harm.

Howard let out a small chuckle. "I don't think I can ever win with her," he stated as he picked up the case and headed to the door. "I'll leave now. I have to pack anyways." With that, he was out the door.

Toni wanted to go after him, but Phillips held her back. "Let me go," she ordered. Her arm was still firmly against chest.

After making sure they were alone, he spoke, "Stark, relax." He paused. "I take your relationship with your father was shitty?"

"How can you tell?" she asked as she shook his hand off her. "You should watch calling me Stark. We don't want anyone to hear that."

"They'll just think you two are married," he chuckled.

"Me married to him?" she pointed toward the door with her left hand. "I would shot myself."

"He isn't that bad for the most part."

Her eye twitched. "Not that bad? Have you tried working with him?" He looked at her. "Okay, Okay. I know you are now. But his ego just makes me want to puke."

"And yours does that to me," he stated.

"Ouch. I'm not that bad."

"No, worse," he stated. Toni opened her mouth as if to protest, but he cut her off. "Let's go. We have things to. We're heading out."

"Heading out where?" she asked.

"You don't need to know. Just get ready."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni had no idea where Howard was with her device, as she hadn't seen him since that night she hurt her arm. It annoyed the hell out of her that he had taken her device with him, but she didn't say anything as she realized that she needed a break. She had been working on it for days without end. Maybe, it would give her fresh eyes, because right now, she couldn't think of anything and it was frustrating her.

Exhaling slowly, Toni, who was in the tent that she shared with Peggy, pushed herself up into a sitting position on the cot. She glanced at Peggy's cot, which vacant and neat. For as long as Toni knew Peggy, she was immaculate and never had a hair out of place, and it made sense that she would be that way now.

Always getting up at 4am, Peggy, who was never late for anything, would fold her blanket and set it at the end of the cot and leave soon after. Toni's glance dropped to Peggy's items, which were neatly packed and stored under the cot. Though Toni had tried to be neat, her side of the tent could not compete with Peggy's. It looked like her clothes, which was impressive as she had only a small amount, exploded on her side. Peggy, like always, did not approve.

Her mind wandered to Peggy, and Toni wondered if the agent had noticed that Toni hadn't been sleeping. Yes, she had gone to bed each night with the intention of sleeping, but she just couldn't. She couldn't get her mind to stop, and it would only allow her to rest for few hours before she found herself staring up at the tent. At some point of the nights, she would watch Peggy sleep, wishing she could rest like her. Yes, it was fucken creepy, but she couldn't force herself to look away.

When she couldn't stare anymore, she would take a long walk around the camp, which Phillips wasn't too happy about, but he didn't stop her. After the long stride, she would return to the tent and curl up in a ball under the blanket. She would play with a wrench as she would try to close her eyes and sleep, which would work only for a few seconds before she was staring off again. When Peggy woke for the day, Toni would listen to her movements, which relaxed her for some odd reason. It allowed her to drift.

Today was no different, but it didn't last. As soon as Carter left, Toni was wide awake. Kicking her feet over the edge of the cot, Toni buttoned up her shirt, which was partly undone to allow for some freedom around her neck. The good thing about rooming with Peggy was that she knew about the reactor and Toni didn't have to hide it, though she did catch the Agent staring at it. The reactor, which was dim as ever, had seemed to have stabled, but that didn't mean anything. It could still fail at any moment, and she knew for sure it would fail if that device misfired like it did before in the lab.

After slipping into her combat boots and the wrench to her pants' pocket (to Toni's joy, she was wearing pants), she exited the tent in the search of her favorite person, though Phillips would not like that. Even if he believed her, she was not his favorite person and she was okay with that. Putting on a smile, she ignored the looks and stupid ass comments from the male solders as she walked through the camp. She didn't understand how they thought whistling or stupid pickup lines would make her want to drop her pants.

Just the Colonel's Tent came into view, she stopped as she heard someone yelling. "Fire Rocket!"

Toni turned. "Fire Rocket?" she asked, eyeing the solder running toward her. He looked familiar, but she couldn't place him.

When he was a few feet away from her, he spoke, "I'm surprise to find you here, Fire Rocket. Not that it's unpleasant." He gave her a creepy smile as he looked her over.

"Do I know you?" Toni asked, eyeing him. She had to have met him before as he knew her, but she had no idea of where. "What's with the name Fire Rocket?" She had no idea why he called her that. It was annoying as all hell.

"We met before outside the theater. You were with that Rogers guy," he stated. He sounded bitter. "I still have no idea why they choose him for the project but I guess it doesn't matter now. He's just a poster boy." He waved a comic in her face. Even though she couldn't get a good look at it, she knew it was a Captain America comic.

"I think you're jealous," Toni stated as she tried to walk away, but the unnamed guy stepped in front of her. "Is there a problem, Private?"

He let out a laugh. "You're such a fire Rocket."

"What does that even mean? Do you even hear to yourself?" Toni asked out of annoyance. He stepped closer to her, and Toni could smell his stench, which was a combination of a few of things "Also, do you believe in showers?" Though it wasn't as bad she pretended, she waved the smell out of her face.

"You have such a mouth."

"O', I know." She paused. "And I'm not a Fire Rocket." She still had no idea of why this solder would call her that. She was a hot head, but she wasn't sure she would call herself a fire rocket.

"But you are. If you like, I can show you," he stated as he reached out to her.

Before he could touch her, Toni hit his arm away. "There's nothing you can show me."

"That wasn't very nice. Someone should teach you matters."

It hit her. _The alley!_ He was the asshole that attacked Steve in the alley and slapped her ass, which no one did and got away with. He was also the reason why Steve and she didn't talk for days. "It won't be you," she snapped. Shaking her head, she turned to leave, but she didn't get too as he grabbed her arm. "What the hell? Let me go, Private," she ordered, using ranks.

"Corporal Sark, where would the fun be in that?" he asked. "I just want to show you a good time." They were starting to attract a crowd; however, no one did anything except watch.

She tried to pull away but she couldn't break away from his grab. "Let me go," she ordered.

"That would be no fun."

Without another thought, Toni swung her fist and decked him in the face, sending him back. "Find your fun elsewhere, Fucker," she hissed. "I'm not opening my legs for you."

The Private regained his composer and stepped toward Toni, who could see his anger as he grabbed her. "You-"

Before Toni realized what happened, the asshole was pushed off her and she stumbled back without the weight on her arm. She looked around to see what the hell had happened, and there to her surprised stood Barnes. The sight of him pissed her off, even if it was a relief.

"Who the hell are you?" the asshole asked as he dusted himself off. "Why don't you mind your business?" The crowd just watched the three of them.

"If you touch her again, I'll beat the shit out of you, and her wellbeing is my concern, Private," Barnes stated as he grabbed the man by the collar. "GO." He shoved him off. There was a movement along the crowd but none stepped forward to break up the fight.

The man glanced at Toni before he rested his eyes on Barnes. "I'll be back," he stated before he disappeared into the crowd.

Toni watched him leave before she turned to Barnes. She only stared at him for a second before she disappeared into the crowd as well. She had wanted to speak to Salty, but the sight of Barnes irritated her. He had betrayed her to Phillips, and she could not look pass that.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Somehow, she made it back to her tent without being stopped, but when she got there, she wasn't so lucky. In front of her stood Barnes, who was eyeing her intensely. "Why are you here?" she asked as she played with the wrench in her pocket. There was nothing she wanted to hear from him.

"Can we talk, Toni?" Barnes as he stepped toward her. He was dressed in his combat uniform, and even with his face all bruised up, he was sexy as hell.

Toni's eye twitched. Why did the universe hate her? "Why are you here?" she asked.

"I need to explain," he stated as he stepped to her.

She looked him over and stopped at his black eye. "What happened to you?"

"Just came back from combat," Barnes answered. "It got a little ruff, but it isn't anything that I can't handle." He paused. "I think it makes me look manlier." He let out a laugh. "What do you think?"

Toni narrowed her eyes as she crossed her arms against her chest. Her fingers were tapping in annoyance. "I don't know if I would consider you a man."

"Toni."

"Don't Toni me," she demanded. "Why are you here?" She didn't want to talk to him. She had other things that she could be doing instead of wasting her time talking to him, especially when he betrayed her to Colonel Salty. Yes, she knew everything turned out well as she was closer in fix that damn device, but he was the reason why she was in a damn cell for a month. For the longest time, her voice was the only voice she heard, and it was annoying.

"I want to explain why I did it."

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "You don't need to. I know why you did. You thought what you were doing was for the best. I would've done the same thing." It was true that she would've, but that didn't mean she had to like it.

Relief flashed across his face. "Toni-"

"However," she interrupted, "that doesn't mean jack shit." She took a deep breath. "Doesn't change anything."

"I'm sorry. Please, listen."

Toni didn't understand why she was even having this conversion. Why did she even care about his friendship? She didn't need his friendship, which served as a distraction. "Thank you for saving me from that ass." She paused as she studied the expression on his face. "But I don't need your explanation or your apology. You don't _need_ to explain anything to me. We _aren't_ friends. See? No issue. Now go."

Barnes' expression changed. "You can't order me. I outrank you, Corporal."

She so hated that title, and she was tired of everyone calling her by it. "I know that, _Sergeant_." How in the hell did he get that rank? She wanted to punch the person who gave it to him. "But I don't care! Just go."

"Toni, when I agreed to tail you, I didn't do it to prove you guilty. I did it to prove you innocent," he stated.

How many times did she have to tell him that she didn't care, that she didn't need it? "We aren't anything besides roommates for a brief time." She let out a laugh. "Bad roommates, really, but again, it doesn't matter. You act like it hurt me that you did it. It didn't. I need to care for you to be hurt by you, and I don't care."

His face fall. "Toni, I-"

"How many times do you have to tell I don't need your apology?" she asked. Her hand was holding the handle of the wrench tightly.

Barnes took a deep breath. "I get it," he stated as he put his hands up in surrender. He turned away from her and walked away. "I am sorry," he stated a few feet away from her.

Toni watched him leave, knowing this was for the best. She had other things to do, like see Salty, which she hadn't been able to do. She had something to talk to him about.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hoped you enjoyed this. Please let me know! :)
> 
> And sorry for the lack of Steve, who would be missing from the next chapter as well. :( However, it seemed like Howard made it through this chapter without being beaten by Toni. You think he will make it through the next in one piece?


	15. The Engineer's Guilt

Toni let out an annoyed chuckle as the damn device shocked her yet again; however, she was closer in finding a solution as the shock wasn't as wild as before, though no solution would matter if she couldn't power it. No matter what she tried, she couldn't get enough power to it, and it wouldn't retain the power. "Maybe, a more stable power source might work out the kinks. Or I can put in so much power into it that it won't matter that it's spitting some back," she stated as she ran another diagnostic on her phone-turned scanner.

Shaking her head, she stepped away. "You're fooling yourself," she told herself, as she crossed to the window and stared out at the busy city street. They had been on the move nonstop for several weeks, and Toni had lost count to how many cities and camps she had been.

She let out a chuckle, remembering all of the countless posters that she seen of Steve in that stupid outfit. She thought his outfit in the future was bad, but this get-up was completely hilarious. She couldn't believe that he went along with the Senator's idea, but she guessed she knew why. He wanted to be doing something, and he was doing something, even if it was comical.

On the other hand, Salty seemed to trust her a little more, allowing her to work alone, and he also learned that it was a mistake to leave her in the room with her father. The last time that she was, she threw a wrench at his head. Howard had dodged and laughed it off, but the Colonel, annoyed that neither of them would tell him why she threw it, thought it would be best to separate them for a bit. Peggy, though silent, did not approve, which Toni could see as plain as day.

Toni crossed back to the device and loaded it into the suitcase just as the door to the small lab opened. "Stark," she greeted as she glanced up. She was getting him her famous glare.

"Hey, Toni." He had on his stupid smile, which matched his annoying fancy suit that he always wore.

"What do you want?" she asked as she locked the suitcase. There was no real point to lock it as both Howard and Phillips had a key, but it gave her a little comfort to lock it.

"To see how you're doing," he replied as he stepped to the table.

"I'm good."

"Really?" He eyed her not believing her. "How's the device going? Besides the fact that it keeps sucking the power from the building, it does appear to be functioning." He paused. "Maybe, that's the point? However, wouldn't you consider that a weapon? I thought you opposed making weapons, Sark." His friendly tone changed.

Toni let out a huff. "That was the main purpose of the device," she answered. Howard was too damn smart to fool and Toni wouldn't even try to lie to him, as it would be a waste of both of their time.

"Was?" he asked, eyeing her.

"Yes, was, but the main purpose changed. The power sucking is just a side effect to the new purpose."

"Is that what happened to the thing in your chest?" he asked. His eyes dropped to her chest where the covered rector was located. His eyes hovered.

"Hey, Buddy, do you want to me to throw another wrench at you?" she asked as she reached for the closest tool on the table. "Correction, a screwdriver. You want me to throw a screwdriver at you?" she yelled as she waved the screwdriver. "And you ask a lot of questions."

"I like questions," Howard stated.

Toni raised her eyebrow. "Why do you care about my chest piece?" she asked as she crossed her arms against her chest. "You don't need to worry about it." The screwdriver dangled from her hand dangerously.

He blew out slowly. "You know. I'm just trying to help. Nothing wrong with asking for help."

She laughed. "This isn't about help. You want to know how I outsmarted you." She was being childish she knew, but it wasn't every day that she had her father guessing, and she was going to enjoy it.

Howard stared at her as he tried to read her. "So what did I do?"

"What are you talking about?" Toni asked.

"What did I do to make you dislike me so much?" he asked as crossed back to the door. He closed the door with his foot and stood in front of it to block her escape. "I don't remember ever doing anything to piss you off, and even if I did, how can you allow that dislike to control you? It seems like you need this device to work, and I can help with that." He paused and took a deep breath. "Stop being rash and juvenile."

Her arms dropped to her side and her hands balled, burying the screwdriver in her hand. _Calm down, Stark,_ she told herself. She hated that he was right yet again. "I doubt I'm the only one who doesn't like you."

"You aren't, but most women love me, well that if you don't count the ones whose hearts I have broken."

"And I bet there's a lot," she stated, knowing her father was a lady's man. That was one of the reasons for her parents' fights. Her mother had thought her father was having an affair and had even accused Peggy of sleeping with him. Now, Toni didn't know if her father had cheated and she didn't want to know, but she wouldn't have put it pass him.

"Tell me what I did… or what my company did." He was clearly annoyed. "We don't have time for your hatred."

Even if Toni wanted to tell him, she couldn't, but she had to tell him something. "Let's just say, I lost my father because of Stark Industries," she admitted as she set the screwdriver down on the table. Her eyes flickered to the metal suitcase for a second before she stepped to the door. Howard moved aside, letting her pass, as he was unsure of what he should say to that.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Colonel Phillips had them on the move again, and this time, Toni found herself in Italy. The camp was located on the edge of the woods, which would prove some coverage if there was an attack from the sky, and it would also make it easy to escape into the woods, which Toni had learned. Instead of her long walks through the camp, she would sneak pass the border of the camp and the guards. They had almost caught her the first few times, but she had learned their schedules and found a hole. It worried her slightly, but she didn't alert anyone to the security risk. It wasn't her place, and if she told them, it could ruin the time line.

Yes, it was stupid to leave the camp and tread through the woods so close to enemy's lines, but she couldn't stay in the camp anymore. She needed space, and she did have a gun, which she had pickpocketed from some guy who had flirted with her. He had thought that she was feeling him up when she lifted it from the idiot. She knew he realized it but he didn't want to admit that a woman got the best of him. That was the only good thing about this time: no one would expect a woman.

With the gun and a journal tucked in her belt, Toni headed deep into the woods to the point that she couldn't see or hear the camp. Having been to this area a few time, she had set up a mini camp for herself where she could work in peace. She wasn't able to bring her device as the locked suitcase was with the Colonel; he didn't want her to go too far with it. However, she was able to scan the Arc Reactor, without being watched. Taking it partly out, she was able to connect the scanner to it, and though it gave her an idea of what was wrong with it, it confirmed that the reactor could not be fixed in this time. Most of the technology that she would need was not invented yet.

After disconnecting the scanner and pushing the reactor back into her chest, Toni headed back to the camp, knowing that someone would be looking for her. It was about halfway when she noticed someone following her, and for a split second, panic overtook her; she was able to calm herself after a few deep breaths. It was clear that her stalker didn't know that she spotted him. Not learning from past experiences, she circled back to get the drop on her tail, and after a few minutes, she confused, which was something that she could tell from the distance, the man by laying a few false tails.

Toni grabbed the gun from her belt, and training it on the tail, she slowly made her away toward him without taking her eyes off him. When she got within a foot of him, she struck him hard in the back, causing the man to stumble forward and fall on his hands. He tried to stand, but Toni didn't gave him the chance and hit the side of his face with the gun, sending him back to the ground. "Who are you?" she demanded as pointed the gun at his upper back.

The man sluggishly turned around. "Toni," he called as he faced her.

She felt her face twitch as Barnes stared deep into her eyes. "Stay down," she ordered as he started to stand.

"Toni," he stated, with a chuckle; he wasn't listening to her demand.

It annoyed her that he wasn't taking this seriously, that he wasn't taking her seriously. "Why are you following me?" she asked.

After dusting himself off, Barnes rubbed the spot that Toni decked him with the gun. He could already feel the black eye coming on. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay."

"Who said I wasn't?" she asked. Keeping the gun trained on him, she shifted her body. She wasn't a good shot, but she knew she couldn't miss from this distance.

Barnes took a step forward, which Toni didn't like it. "I've seen you sneak out countless times into these woods, Toni. You know how dangerous that is? I wanted to make sure you were okay."

"Really? You're worried about me? That's funny." She let out a chuckle. "I can handle myself, thank you." She stared deep into his eyes as she tried to figure out what was going through his head.

"Can you really?" he asked with a smirk. "Can I test you?"

"You're flirting with me now?" she hissed. "You got some nerves." How could he be flirting with her after what he had done? Did he think she would be weak at the knees if he flirted with her? "And I can take care of myself!"

Before Toni could react, Barnes rushed forward, grabbed her hand, and twisted it, disarming her. She stumbled back, landing on her ass. "Can you now?" he asked as he trained the gun on her.

Frustration filled Toni as she stared down the barrel of the gun. What was his point of him taking it? Was it just to show her how weak she was? Or was he going to take her back to Phillips and call her traitor? "Don't count me out," she said through her teeth.

Barnes sighed as he put the gun away and offered his hand to Toni. "I would never. You're too spunky for that." She glared at his extended hand. "There's nothing wrong with accepting a helping hand." He let out another chuckle at his pun.

"Why would I take it from you?" She asked as she slapped his hand away.

"Toni."

She forced the growl down her throat as she pushed herself to her feet. "Stop saying my name." She hated how he said it. He said it as if he cared.

"What should I call you then?" he asked with a smile.

"Just stop it," she demanded as she dusted off her ass. Her journal was still safe in her belt, which gave her some relief. It held some of her secrets.

He took a deep breath. "Toni." He paused. "I followed you as this isn't safe."

She let out a chuckle. "And you think the camp is safer?" she asked. She couldn't count all of the times that some asshole tried to force himself on her, thinking she was easy.

Barnes took a step toward her. "Nowhere is safe if you can't defend yourself, and I want to help you with that."

"You want to teach me?" she asked, with an eyebrow raised. "I can protect myself. I don't need you to show me." She would keep saying it until he believed her.

"Really?" he asked as he took the gun out of his pocket and waved it in front of her. "How did I take this from you so easily?" He let out a chuckle. Was this a game to him?

"Shut it," Toni snapped, knowing that he was right. She may have gotten her sexy body back, but she needed to work on defending herself. She couldn't rely on her technology like she did in the future. "Fine, I accept your help, but I want this back." She crossed to him and snatched the gun from his hand.

His face lit up. "You're such a ball of fun."

"Just because I agree to let you help, it does not mean I forgive you," she stated as she tucked the gun away.

Shaking his head, Barnes smiled. "I thought that there was no need to forgive me as you didn't care about me."

Toni's eye twitched. "I don't."

"If you say so."

"I do!" she stated as she turned to walk away. She could feel him right behind her with his eyes on her. It annoyed her that he could get in her good graces so easily, but it pissed her off that he was right and that would bug her to no end. She also didn't like the fact that he could read her so well, and she hated that she needed him. No matter how many times she told herself that she didn't need him or his protection, it didn't change the fact that she did.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni wanted to scream, because she didn't know what else to do. Though the device hadn't shocked her in a while, she couldn't get it to do anything besides sending her back one fucken minute; however, she couldn't be sure it did even that. Her clock could've been off for minute for all she knew, but that couldn't be right as the object at the end of the table moved slight. Then again, that could've been her imagination. That damn device was driving her crazy and it was hard to tell what was real.

Though no matter the outcome, she wasn't any closer to getting home, because she needed more than one minute worth of power, and she had no idea of how to get that. Her father and the Colonel had supplied her with a power source, but it wasn't enough. She needed more. She was unsure of where to get that power.

If that wasn't bad enough, she had to deal with the Sassy Agent. She could handle the cold shoulder from Peggy, but it was draining. That woman never let up; she kept going and going and her insults weren't direct, but Toni knew they were about her. At first, Toni didn't blame her, but now, it was annoying. She had no idea why the agent was such a bitch. Was it because she brought up Rogers? Was she as close to him? Was she jealous? Why in the hell would she be jealous? There was and would be nothing going on between Rogers and her. Toni took a deep breath as she thought about it. Maybe, it was wrong to bring up Rogers, but Peggy shouldn't be taking it so seriously.

Then there was Phillips. She wasn't sure what he thought about her, but it was exhausting trying to read him; however, she knew one thing: he was strict. She couldn't do anything without asking, and if she tried anything, he knew. She wondered if he was psychic or something. He had found out about her walks in the woods, which he wasn't very happy about it to say the least. She thought she would've gone deaf after that lecture, which Future Rogers could've been proud of, and on top of that, Salty wouldn't let her go anywhere alone. After a few days, he let up and allowed her some freedoms back, but he kept her on a short leash.

It was too much to handle at the moment, and she did what she did best: she ran. Taking a break from everything, she disappeared into the woods again, but she wasn't alone. Barnes was with her, as he became her shadow lately. She wasn't sure if it was just because Salty had told him to or if he was trying to make up for being an ass. The reason didn't matter, because his presence was relaxing, even if he told her that she was being stupid.

"Toni," Barnes called. He had been trying to talk her into staying close to the camp, which was in eyesight. "Slow down."

Toni stopped and turned back to Barnes, who was a few feet behind her. "Where's the fun in that?" she asked, smiling.

He shook his head as he paused to rest. "I thought you wanted to train."

"You just want to touch this, let's face it." She motioned to her body, which looked amazing even in the loose fitting military uniform. To cover the reactor's glow, she was wearing a long sleeve shirt under a loose fitting short sleeve one. Her cargo military pants were tucked in her boots and belted at her natural waist, which was annoying as it made her feel like a grandma. She had never worn pants that high. Dog tags, with her fake last name, hanged around her neck, worrying her slightly as it clanged whenever it bounced off the reactor. Thought it wasn't loud, it was noticeable, or… maybe it wasn't. She may have only noticed it because she knew there.

"I do want to train," she added, out of breath. They had been running for miles, and she had sweat dripping down her face. "Let's go." She stepped back to him. "I'm rea-" Without watching where she stepped, she tripped over a tree root and before she could even think to put on her arms out, she found herself in Barnes' chest. His arms were wrapped around her, making her forget where she was.

Toni felt him laugh before she heard it. "You got to be careful."

"Me careful?" She laughed. "You're funny." She pushed him away slightly so she could look up at him. She was worried about him being this close and noticing the glow, but she realized that he wasn't anywhere else but her eyes. "There's no fun in that..." She could feel the heat buildup in her cheeks.

"I get risks, but you need to be smart about them."

It was here that she started to lose track of what he was saying. Between getting lost in his eyes and distracted by his hand, which rubbed her back in a cyclical motion, she didn't know what was going on, but she knew it wasn't good and this couldn't continue; however, she didn't know if she could push him away. There was something relaxing about being in his arms, which was different than all the other arms she had been in. _Stop being a bowl of Jelly!_ She told herself. _Am I really that kind of girl to melt over a guy?_ She asked. Closing her eyes, she pushed him away hard and swung her arm blindly.

She felt his hands drop and him dodge. "Hey!" he yelled. Opening her eyes, she throw another punch at him and he was able to dodge that too. "What the hell?"

"You have to be ready for anything," she said as she tried to kick him. As he caught her leg, she tried to mask what she was feeling. She couldn't believe that he was getting to her.

"Geez, Toni," he muttered as she had him on the defensive. She was throwing punches and kicks like there was no tomorrow. "Good to know all of these lessons are working out well." Toni let out a chuckle as she swung again, but Barnes caught this one. She tried to pull away, but she couldn't break his grip. "Gotcha."

She growled which made him laugh harder. She threw the other fist in annoyance, but that wasn't too smart as he was able to grab it as well. "Ass," she muttered.

Barnes smirked as he raised her hands above her head and walked her back into a tree. "But I'm a loveable ass."

"I'm not sure about the loveable part," she stated through her teeth. She looked up into his eyes and felt her anger disappear. It was hard to be mad at that face.

"C'mon, just look at these eyes," he replied within an inch of her face. He still hadn't let go of her wrist.

Toni let out a snort. "I don't-"

"Am I interrupt something?" A female voice asked.

Barnes released Toni's wrists, stepped away from Toni as if he was caught doing something illegal. "No, Ma'am."

Toni let out a huff of annoyance as she turned toward Peggy, who was giving her a look. She hated that look she received from Peggy whenever she did something wrong. "Can I help you?" Toni asked, annoyed at Peggy had interrupted them. Toni wasn't sure what she had interrupted, but it was still frustrating. Toni took a deep breath.

Peggy looked at Barnes for a second before she turned to Toni, who was blowing her bangs out of her face. "Sergeant Barnes, can you leave us? I have something to speak with Corporal Sark about." Her arms were across her chest and she stood firm. No one dared mess with her, when she was like that.

"Yes, ma'am," Barnes replied as he turned to leave. He gave Toni a look before he walked back to the camp.

Once he was gone, Toni pushed off the tree and stepped to Peggy, who was dressed in her formal uniform. "Heels, Agent?" she asked. "Is that a good idea for this terrain? I tripped and I was wearing boots." She picked up her foot and waved it at Peggy.

Peggy let out a sigh. "Are you always like this, Sark?" she asked.

"Like what?" She asked, narrowing her eyes. What the hell was Peggy going on about, now?

The Agent shook her head. "Never mind."

"No, say it." Toni hated when people had shit to say, but they wouldn't say it. She liked honesty and loathed it when people lied to her. She was an adult and she could handle it.

Peggy took a deep breath. "You like to play the victim, while you're the one leading them on. It is quite pathetic," she answered. "You just like to break hearts."

Toni took a deep breath to calm herself, because Peggy's statement just infuriated her. "Play?" She tried to hold back her anger but it was seeping through. "I do not play and I'm _not_ a victim."

Peggy shook her head. "Then what was that?" she asked, referring to Barnes.

"He's a friend."

"You're playing him. You're playing everyone."

Toni's hand balled and her nails dug into her skin. She wasn't playing anyone, though there was a time in her life that she did. _Calm down,_ she told herself. It wouldn't do any good to snap on Peggy as that was what the Sassy Agent wanted, and she wouldn't give that to her. "Besides insulting me, is there a reason why you interrupted my training?"

"You call that training?" Peggy asked, looking Toni over again. Toni's hair, which was in a high ponytail, was a mess; sticks were sticking out everywhere. Her uniform looked disheveled. "Maybe, Steve can train me."

The genius let out a chuckle as she couldn't believe this was about Rogers. "He might like that." She let out a sighing laugh. She couldn't believe she was fighting with Peggy over a fucken guy, a fucken guy that she didn't even want. And besides, he was an ass. She didn't date asses as there could only be one ass in a relationship and that was her position. Two couldn't work in a relationship. Her brain stopped and she wondered for a second what it would be like to date the famous Captain America. Would he be the overprotective type, never letting her out of his sight? Would he be the snappy type, who would never forget any important date? Would he be the traditional type with no sex before marriage? The calm and boring type? That wouldn't work for her, as she loved to be wild… Wait, was why she even thinking about it?

"Are you there, Sark?" Peggy asked, noticing her mind wandering.

Shaking her head, she snapped out of her thoughts. "So again, Sassy, what do you want?" she asked as she rubbed her forehead. She was starting to get a headache.

Peggy's eye twitch. "Sassy?" she asked.

"Yes, Sassy. My name for you," Toni explained as she walked pass the agent. "If you're not going to answer, I'm leaving."

"I don't like it."

The genius turned back slightly and looked at Peggy over her shoulder. "And Salty doesn't like his, but I still call him that." She put on a big smile. "Besides, we can't like everything." She could see Peggy's eye twitch, and it was hard to hold back her laugher.

"Anyhow, that reminds me. Colonel Phillips wants to speak to you."

"You could tell me this sooner?" Toni asked.

"I'm telling you now."

"And you call me childish," she snorted. Without another word, Toni headed toward Phillips' tent.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni exhaled slowly as she enter the Colonel's tent, which looked like a stereotypical field office. A typewriter, which she mentally chuckled about, was in the corner of the tent, and in another corner, there were barrels of maps, or what looked like maps. There was a makeshift desk between them, and across from the desk, the Colonel, talking to a male officer, stood at a table that had a map laid out on top of it. Another male solder stood at the end of the table watching in silence as Salty spoke; each one of them were of a high rank. There were also 4 guards positioned outside the tent at the corners to make sure no one got in that was not welcome.

Toni watched for a few seconds, wondering if they would notice her, and when they didn't, she thought it would be best to announce her presence. "Colonel Phillips, I heard you wanted to speak to me," she spoke loudly. The two unnamed officers turned and looked at her, but they reminded silence.

Philips looked up at Toni. "You heard right. Men, can you leave us for a few minutes?" he asked as he turned to his desk. "And close the flaps when you leave."

"Yes, Sir," they replied at the same time.

Toni didn't watch as they left, but she felt their judging eyes on her. She could guess what they were thinking and it wasn't something that she would like. After hearing the flaps close, she spoke, "What can I help you with, Salty?"

"I wish you would stop calling me back, but at least, you didn't call me that in front of my Officers."

"I have my moments." She stepped toward the table that the officers were standing moments before and stared down at the map. As they were still in Italy, she knew before looking at the map that it was of Italy and the surrounding areas. "So why did you call?"

"How's your device going?"

That wasn't what Toni thought he wanted to talk about, but she wasn't surprise by the question. As she had not seen or spoke to him recently, she could understand why he was asking. "I have a few bugs to work out, but it's going in the right direction. Still need a power source." Unfortunately, she had no idea of what she could use.

"And how's the device in your chest?" He asked as he forced his eyes to anywhere that wasn't Toni's chest.

"It's fine. Needs some adjustments, but it's still operational." Something was up.

The Colonel crossed to the files on the table and pretended, which Toni could tell even from a few feet away, to look through them. "I see you and Sergeant Barnes are getting along."

"You called me here, so you can talk about my rel- friendship with Barnes?" she asked, refusing to say the word relationship. They did _not_ have a relationship, and she would refuse to have one.

"No, it's not the main reason." He paused for a few seconds. "I see you got pass him tailing you."

Toni shook her head in a no fashion, because she hadn't gotten it pass it; however, she understood it. He was following someone that could've been a criminal. "Do you have any idea of who attacked me in the alley?" Though little by little she was getting over it, it still woke her in the middle of the night in a pool of sweat. She was beginning to believe that Peggy was noticing.

"We have some leads."

"So in other words no," Toni translated, bitterly. She didn't know what she was expecting but she would've thought that they knew something. Someone had attacked her and it wasn't random. Someone was after her for a reason. Did they know she was from a future? If not that, were they after her because she was a genius? It had her worried, because if they didn't know the reason, they couldn't figure out who it was. "What have you guys been doing?"

The Colonel turned around. "You're exhausting, you know that?"

"That was what my nannies told me when I was a child." She had gone through many nannies in her youth.

"Had a lot of nannies, did you? I guess I can understand why you don't get along with your father." He leaned back against his desk and looked at her.

 _Urgh,_ she thought. She couldn't believe that she had let that slip; it was stupid. She was stupid. "I did not say that."

He let out a chuckle. "You didn't have to. With Howard being Howard, it would make sense that you had a lot of nannies, and that you two weren't close." He let out a sigh. "However, I can't have you throwing things at him, even if he deserves it."

"I only threw the wrench at him," she paused, "though, I almost threw a screwdriver at him." Salty gave her a look at hearing that. "Don't look at me like that! He so deserved it. He's an ass. How can anyone stand him and that planet size ego," she explained, shaking her head.

"He reminds me of you."

"Shut it." That was an insult that she didn't want to hear. "I'm not my father."

Taking a deep breath, Salty crossed back to the table. "Do you know what this is?" he asked as he pointed to an area on the map.

With her arms folded across her chest, Toni glanced at him before looking down at the table. As it was a 1940's, it took Toni a few seconds to realize what she was looking at. She could see a few enemy camps close to where they were. She suddenly realized why Barnes didn't like her to stray too far. "So is this why you asked me here?" she asked.

"I had promised myself that I wouldn't ask you anything about the future," he responded.

"So that's what this is about," she muttered. "I won't tell you anything." She shook her head and stepped away from the table. She eyed a knife sitting on a table a foot from a shotgun.

"Do you know who Johann Schmidt is?" Phillips asked.

Toni crossed to the knife and picked it up. "I do," she answered as she played with the blade. She had read about that mad man in a few of her father's journals. Schmidt's technology was ahead of its time and her father had-would spend months trying to figure it out.

"There's a rumor he'll be at this base," he stated as he pointed to a location on the map.

With the knife still in her hand, she stepped back to the Colonel. "And you want me to confirm it, Salty?" Toni asked as the blade danced in her hand.

"I'm sending the 107 in and I want to make sure I'm not sending them in to be slaughtered."

Toni looked down at her hand and noticed a fine red line. _I must've cut it and not noticed,_ she thought. "You know I can't help you," she stated, as she thought about the future. She didn't know when exactly, but Salty's men would get captured and Rogers would save them. Though Toni hated the idea that some of these men would be taken and killed, she couldn't do anything. Rogers had to save them.

"I know." He took a deep breath and turned away.

She looked at him, feeling like a total bitch. How could she do this? _For the future,_ she told herself. "You need to do things as if I'm not here." She set the knife on the table and walked away. She shook her head as she remembered the time in the lab that she had given her father advice, which had worked. Toni had made a mistake that day, but she couldn't help it. It wasn't often that she knew something that her father didn't.

Salty shook his head as he blew out. "I get it. Thank you," he said.

With those words, Toni felt like she had just murdered someone.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni took a deep breath as she made her way back to her tent. After leaving the Colonel, she felt ill, and with each passing second, she felt worse as she eyed the solders. Was she sentencing them all to death? _No, you aren't,_ she countered as she tried to calm herself. _You aren't supposed to be here in the first place and they're supposed to die._ She knew that she couldn't change the future, but it didn't make her feel any better. _And then, there's Barnes._ She had to stop and catch her breath as she thought about his death. Though she didn't have that legendary connection that Rogers had with him, she had a connection, which she didn't approve of, with Barnes, and knowing that he would die stopped her in her track. She bent down with her hands on her knees as she tried to breathe. "I hate this," she muttered to herself.

"You're just being stupid," she told herself. She pushed herself up, exhaling slowly. She had to get her mind off Barnes' death. _This is why you shouldn't have gotten close to him_. However, she knew, even if she didn't have that connection, that she would take his death hard. She was human after all. Knowing that someone was going to die and that there was no way to stop it would weigh heavy on anyone.

Toni jumped as she felt a hand on her shoulder. "Mother fucker!"

"What a mouth on you, Fire Rocket."

Her hands balled as she eyed the man who had grabbed her. She still did not know his name. "What do you want?" she asked, ready to slug him. She was not in the right mind set to deal with him.

"Are you okay?" he asked. "I'm not going to try anything." He put his hand up in surrender.

She shook her head as she didn't believe him. He was up to something. "I'm fine," she snapped. "What do you want?"

His put his hands in his pocket. "You look like you need a friend."

Something in her mind snapped and she slapped him. "If I need a friend, you will not be it." Why in the hell did he think she would want to be friends with him?

He held his face, which was turning red. "I just thought that-"

"You thought what? That if you're nice, I would have sex with you?" she asked, hissing. The man just looked at her as if she had shot him. "Just leave me alone."

"I didn't-"

"Is everything okay over here?" Barnes asked as he came running over from somewhere. He angrily eyed the unnamed solder.

Toni watched Barnes as he turned down the asshole. Turning to her, he gave her a worried look. "Things are fine," she lied as she stared at him. Seeing Barnes was draining all of the control that she had; she had to get away or she would break and she could not allow that to happen in public. "I got to go," she stated, louder and squeaker than she intended.

Before either man could say anything or even react, Toni bolted. She heard Barnes calling after her, but she would not stop. She could not stop. His death kept playing in her head, and her guilty was weighing on her. Though she hadn't known how he died, she kept seeing his death and each way was different. She had to get those images out of her head or she was going to go crazy.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni smiled when her tent came into view as it was her escape, but it didn't last as she spotted a certain someone laying on her cot reading a journal that she had been keeping. "What are you doing here?" she hissed as she made sure the flaps to the tent were closed. She didn't want anyone to come in and see a god on her cot; that would be hard to explain.

Loki sat up in the cot and put the journal down, keeping it open with two fingers. "I had the desire to see your beauty," he stated with a smirk. "Interesting diary you have it." He fingered the pages of the book.

Toni's eye twitched as she folded her arms across her chest. Though it annoyed her that he had her journal, she wasn't going to show him that it was getting to her as he would like that too much. "Why are you here?" she asked, glaring at him. She wished she could fry him with her eyes.

"I wanted to see you."

"I'm not going to sleep with you," she snapped, taking a step to him. She briefly wondered how he thought she was pretty, looking like she did. She was covered in sweat and mud, her clothes were filthy, and her hair was a mess.

"You'll come around," he replied as he looked down at the journal. He flipped a page. "I expect more guts spilling in here, Stark." He flipped to another page. "All I see is possible ways to fix your device, historical counts of your days' events, and massive guilt. No mention of love. So sad." He glanced up at her with another creepy smile.

"You came here to speak to me about my love life, Loki? Really?" Her day was getting worse and worse, wasn't it?

He closed the journal and slid it away from him. "I find you stimulating, Stark."

Toni closed her eyes for a second. "Are you here just to be creepy?" she asked. "Or do you want something else?"

Loki kicked his feet over the cot and stood up slowly. "Have you thought about my offer?" he asked as he stepped toward Toni. He looked the same as he did when he appeared to her in the cell, but his skin looked paler. If Toni didn't hate him, she would ask about it. "It would be wise to accept."

"It would also be wise if you stop trying to get me in your bed. There's no chance in hell that I would sleep with you and there's no way that I would take your deal," she said, getting angrier with each second. She balled her hands yet again as she tried to calm herself.

"Then you'll never get home." Loki walked back to the cot and pick up Toni's journal. "Don't you want to escape the guilt?" He opened the book to a random page and looked down as if he was going to read it. "You can't get over the guilt that you have knowledge that can spare these mortal's lives." He waved his hand in the air, motioning to the people in the camp. "I'm not sure why you're so guilt ridden over these pathetic humans."

"Did you forget that I'm one of these pathetic humans?" She could feel the hatred in Loki's voice and that was one of the reasons why she could never even think of sleeping with him. "Why don't you just go?"

He glanced her over before looking into her eyes. "You may be human but you're different."

"Yea, different that I'm not afraid to kick your ass!" She so wished that she could punch or kick him in the face. It was so unfair that she couldn't beat the shit out of him.

"I am shaking in my boots," Loki laughed as he dropped the journal on the cot. "Well, that was if I was wearing boots."

Ignoring his stupid comment, Toni eyed the book. "How are you able to touch that?" she asked as she just realized he was touching something on her plane. "And you should be!" She started to push up her sleeves.

"I have my ways."

"Oh, I so want to slap you!"

"Such a turn on," Loki smirked. "Please slap me." He took a few steps toward her. "I have a craving for you."

She shuddered in disgust. Why was this happening to her? Why did every person that she ever met want to sleep with her? She got that she was a sexy god but this was ridicules. "Just leave me alone in my guilt."

"You know you'll never get home without the power to create rifts through space and time, and your device does not have that." He paused. "No matter what you do, it will not have that power on its own. I can help you get that power."

"I don't need you; I am not taking your offer. I got here on my own and I will get home on my own." That statement got her mind going. What the hell was he talking about?

"Your device didn't get you here on its own." Loki laughed as he crossed to her.

"What are you talking about?" she asked. Her brain went into overdrive as she tried to remember everything from the day that she was transported back to this time. "Why am I asking you? You're no help." She shook her head as she thought about everything that Loki and Thor had ever told her. She finally realize what she needed and what she needed was the Tesseract, which would have unlimited power. It could open portals.

Loki stepped even closer and reached for her face. "I can be very helpful. Just let me-"

At that moment, the flaps to the tent flew open and Peggy pushed through. "Are you okay?" she asked as she looked around the tent. "I heard yelling. Were you talking to someone?"

Though she had noticed that Loki had disappeared, that wasn't important. She had to speak to Phillips about her accompanying the 107. "Yes, myself. You know I'm crazy," she stated as she kicked the journal under the bed. "I got to go," She stated as she dashed out of the tent.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni didn't care what meeting she had interrupted when she burst into his Salty's tent. She didn't care about the nasty looks and comments she received from the officers when they exited the tent. She didn't care that the Colonel looked pissed. She didn't care about anything besides getting into that Hydra Base. She knew she wouldn't get the Tesseract itself, but that cube was used to create Hydra weapons. Maybe, if she get her hands on those power cores in the weapons, she might be able to power her device.

"This better be important, Sark," he stated, sticking to Toni's fake last name.

Toni crossed to the table. "I need to accompany the troops."

He looked at her funny. "Accompany them where?" he asked as he picked up a file.

"To the Hydra base," she revealed. "There's something in that base that I need."

Salty narrowed his eyes as he took a seat at his desk. "Tell me what you need and I'll make sure that one of the men brings it back." He rested his arms on the table.

"That's won't do, Salty. I need to get it myself," she stated. She couldn't risk someone else getting it. Besides, she knew no one was going to make it back; the only way to ensure its return was to get it herself.

"I'm not letting you go out there," he spoke as he put on a pair of glasses. He reached for a file and opened it.

"Why is that? Because I'm a woman?" she asked, annoyed that he wouldn't let her do what she needed to do. Couldn't he understand that she couldn't risk anyone else's life? Couldn't he understand that she couldn't take anymore guilt on her conscious?

He stared at the file as if he was reading it but he wasn't. After a few seconds, he looked up at her. "You're correct. I'm not sending a woman out into the battlefield." He flipped a page over.

"Really?!" She couldn't believe that he admitted that. "I can handle it. Barnes taught me a few things."

Phillips took a deep breath as he rubbed his forehead. "You're still not going out."

In anger, she slammed her fists down on his desk. "Listen to me! I need to go." She paused as she tried to read his face. "If you don't let me go, I'll go anyways. Nothing I tried with the device worked, and this is my last shot. If I don't get this, I won't be able to go home." She let out a weak chuckle. "Besides, I'm not supposed to be here, so who cares if I die?"

Resting his head in his hands, he closed his eyes. "Women simply do not fight on the battlefield and I would be laughed at if I let you."

Toni narrowed her eyes. "You're just being sexist."

He looked up startled as if Toni had admitted to killing someone. "I'm no such thing."

Holding back her growl, she glared. Her arms were at her side. "Then let me go."

"I just don't believe you should be on the battlefield." He exhaled slowly as he pushed the documents in front of him away. He looked at her as he tried to figure out what to say. "There're reasons why there aren't woman solders on the battlefield. One being that men are physically stronger than woman."

She knew he was correct but she wasn't going to let him be right. "I can handle it," she stated. With a deep breath, she said, "in the future, there are women in the military and they are serving in the field."

"I thought there would be no future talk?" He sighed as Toni glared at him, which was her response to his question. "What if you're captured?" He eyed her. "Regardless of gender, anyone will fold under continuous torture." He stood up and crossed to one of the flaps as if he was going to leave. "I doubt that my own men could keep silent under harsh torture. How could you?" he asked as he motioned to the officers outside of his tent. "I cannot allow future knowledge to fall in Schmidt's hand."

"No one knows I am from the future," she countered. She paused for a second as she thought about her past. She wasn't as innocent and naïve as he thought she was. She had faced and seen things that she wouldn't wish on anyone. "I have been tortured before," she admitted, weakly. "Do not doubt me."

Phillips turned back to her, and Toni could see the shock in his face. He wasn't expecting that. "Was that how you got that thing in your chest?" he asked, poking to her chest.

She took a deep breath. "Do you really want the answer to that?" she asked.

"No. No, I don't." It didn't take a genius to know why Salty didn't need the answer. "Against my better judgment, I'll let you go, Stark." He paused "You're going to kill me, you know that?"

"You aren't the only one to tell me that," she stated, with a smile.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

"What are you thinking, Toni?"

Taking a deep breath, Toni put down her bag and turned to the tent's flap. "Barnes," she greeted with a smile. "Hey." She knew why he came.

"Toni," he repeated, as he looked her over. "What are you doing?" He was in full battle uniform with his rifle on his back, and he was looking pretty intimidating. She couldn't get pass his eyes and how angry he looked.

"Getting my pack ready," Toni answered, giving him a look of her own.

"I see that, but why?"

"I'm going," Toni responded as she reached down for her bag. She slipped her arms though the straps and pulled it on her back. "Schmidt has something I need," she stated, unsure if Barnes knew who that man was.

Barnes took a step toward her. "Why don't you tell me what you need and I'll get it for you?"

She was getting really sick of being treated like some weakling because she had a damn vagina. "Does this has to do with me being a fucken woman?" she demanded as she got into his face. "I thought you were different." She couldn't believe Barnes was a sexist pig like Phillips.

"No, it isn't. I would be an idiot if I thought that." He took a step back from Toni and looked into her eyes. "I'm just worried that's all." He paused for a second. "You are important to…" He let himself drift off unable to finish it

There was something in his voice that touched her, and she couldn't be mad or upset at him, but she was still annoyed. "You wouldn't even know what it is if I told you." She turned back to the cot and picked the gun up. "I don't need you to protect me."

"Steve would kill me if I let something to you," he stated as he watched her tuck the gun into her pants and hid a knife in her boot.

The Genius' mind spun as she thought about what Barnes had said. Considering how she disappeared on Rogers, would he even care if something happened to her? Surely, after she disappeared without a word, he would have pushed her out of his mind. She knew she would have if someone did that to her. "I don't think Rogers would care." Something inside of her didn't like that thought.

He gave her a funny look. "So he is Rogers again?"

"Yes," she stated as she pushed pass him.

"You know after the Stark Expo when Steve noticed you were gone, he were frantic and went looking for you. It took me a while to get him to come back to the apartment," Barnes admitted as he followed her out. "I know he was still looking when I left him."

She glanced at him before she continued her walk. "Why are you telling me this?"

"I thought you would like to know, so you know how much he cares."

"We don't have time for this," she stated as she tried to ignore what she was feeling. She didn't need more guilt as it was already threatening to take her over. She also tried to tell herself that she didn't care about Rogers' feelings. Why would she care about his feelings? He was an ass, who was warmed and caring. _Urgh, you don't have time for this,_ she told herself. Taking a deep breath, she made her way to the crowd that was forming.

"Toni."

Shaking her head, she forced her glance forward. "Not now, Barnes." She had too many things on her mind to think about Rogers. Right now, she was about to be captured, because if she remembered correctly, that would be the outcome of this mission. Most of the 107 would be killed or taken hostage, and Toni wasn't going to do anything but let it happen. She just didn't have an idea of what she was going to do. Would she allowed herself to be captured? Would she allow the others to be captured while she escaped? She didn't think that she could allow that, even if Rogers would save them. She was heartless and cruel, but she couldn't be that heartless and cruel. She felt sick thinking about it. _You have to be strong,_ she told herself. She had a task to do and she couldn't allow herself to drown in her guilt.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end for now.
> 
> I am sorry that there was no Steve in this one, but he will return in the next chapter.
> 
> I kicked up the speed in this chapter. I am trying to get this story moving. Please let me know what you think.
> 
> And did you all hear in the new Comic of Iron Man, Tony Stark was adopted. I am not sure how I feel about that. It kind of changed the whole story of Iron Man, doesn't it?


	16. Ensnaring Memories

_Once again, Steve could be found drawing, and once again, it was a drawing of Toni. No matter what he did or how much time had passed, he couldn't get her off his mind, and it was bugging him. How could she still be on his mind after all of this time? She had left him…well not_ left _him. That would apply that there was something between them and there wasn't. They were just friends...No, he wasn't even sure about that, because no friend would do what she did. Toni left with no notice, no good bye, no anything. How could she just get up and go? Did she not care enough to say bye? He just needed a good bye. He might not have liked it, but he would have accepted it. Why didn't she?_

_Or maybe, something happened to her? Maybe, she was hurt? Maybe, she was dead? Steve didn't like those idea whatsoever, and his stomach jumped as he thought about it. If something did happen to her, he would hunt down the bastard and… Steve shook his head as he tried to rid himself of that thought. Why was he acting like this? Yes, they were close (though it all could've been a lie), but did he…? Could he say it? Was he? How could he be?_

_Steve took a deep breath as he stared at a sketch of Toni, which looked lifelike. His sketchbook was filled with lifelike pictures of her as he kept drawing her in the hope of working her out of his mind. He had tried focusing on other women, but not only did that feel wrong, none of the women attracted him. They weren't interested in him; they just want to be with Captain America._

_What touched or attracted him to Toni or even Peggy, who he had found himself thinking about as well, was the fact that they saw him, though they both saw him differently. Toni, who hadn't seen him like this, had saw him as him, and being where he was now, he couldn't get pass that. He wanted that, but he doubted that she would want that. She, who didn't seem like the type to settle down, wouldn't even want him anyways. Why would she? He wasn't stupid; he knew he was too naïve her. Plus, there was also the fact that she left, a clear sign she didn't like or care about him. So the question was: did she really see him as him?_

_The glorified super show boy took a deep breath as he thought about their time together. He remembered all of the time she had spent trying to put a smile on his face. He had to give it to her: she was the goofiest person he had ever met; she didn't understand what the word normal meant. He couldn't count all of the times that she had driven him crazy, but it didn't bother him. In fact, he enjoyed her craziness; he wanted to experience her craziness. Those were warming moments for him. He took another deep breath as he thought about all the moments that led to him falling in love with her. There were so many moments._

_There were numerous times during the middle of the nights that she had come bouncing into his room with some annoyingly cute comment, waking him up. Annoyed at first, Steve looked forward to her smiley and energetic face. Though he wished he could sleep more, he enjoyed seeing how bouncy she was. Yes, bouncy. She was bouncy, and to hear her speak, he could listen for hours. She was a philosopher._

_At first, she had just paced in her (Well Bucky's) room, when she had been unable to sleep. She was quiet and unnoticeable, but one night when he got up to go to the restroom, he noticed her, and for the next week, he made sure to pay attention. Without fault, she got up every single night, and he could tell how defeated she was just by listening to her steps. Unsure of what to do, he laid in bed, listening to her. Near the end of the first week, he couldn't listen to her anymore and got up to check on her. He knew most likely that he would say something stupid or made her mad, but he just couldn't do nothing._

_On that night, he had stood in the doorway for a while as he had tried to think of what to say. The door had been slightly open, and he had been able to look in. The state of Toni had worried him, but he could only watch her as she had paced across the room. She had looked totally defeated and exhausted, which was a different side to her. Most of the time, Toni had her cocky side up, and though he hated to see her like this, it had been refreshing to see another side of her._

_When Toni had noticed him at her door, she had tried to play it off and hide her fear and nerviness with her anger, but it didn't take long for her to learn that she couldn't lie to him as Steve could read her, which she didn't like. After he had learned about her nightmares and after she had realized he wouldn't stop bugging her, she had started to let him in, though she would never talk about what was bugging her. Yes, he wanted to talk, but just knowing she would come to him was enough to warm his little heart. And though there had been a few setbacks, Toni and he became friends._

_That was the beginning of the end for Steve. He had been attracted to Toni since he saw her, but that wasn't abnormal. Any woman could do that to him, but there was something else to her that attracted him: she didn't listen. She never listened, even when he begged, and he was thankful for that. Yes, it was crazy to be happy because of that, but he was. He enjoyed the fact that she spoke her mind and refused to let others tell her what to do; however, he wished that she would at least take his words into consideration._

_That smile of hers weren't helping either. It didn't matter the kind of smile or the why she was smiling, any smile of hers could make him melt, even her cocky smile, which he had seen a lot, could do that to him. He knew he was screwed, when he unconsciously started to do things just to make her smile, but he was really screwed when he started to do it consciously. Every time he was around her, he had do something to make her smile and he couldn't stop himself._

_At first, it was hard to get her smile, because she was warily of him and his attempts. With her nightmares which she wouldn't even knowledge, he knew she was afraid to let people in, but he also knew he was getting to her as she started to fight him less. Eventually, she let her smiles out freely around him without him doing anything, though her nightmares were still bothering her. However, he learned that none of it mattered, because no matter how much she smiled at him, she would never want to be with him. He was just a friend to her, which was made clear to him every single time she played wingman for him. That alone annoyed the hell out of him, and though it showed him that she didn't like him like that, hearing her talk him up touched his heart. To hear her call him sweet, kind, honest, trustworthy, and the perfect man just made him love her more. Just hearing her distracted him from the nasty looks he received from the women that Toni had tried to hook him up with when they first saw him. He knew he was in trouble but he could do nothing._

_Toni, on the other hand, could and did do something, and in the end, he was grateful that Toni and he didn't get together. When she had disappeared, she had broken his heart and he was unsure if he could fix it. He should've listened to Bucky from the beginning, when he stated he was going to get hurt. He was right, but he never thought Toni could hurt him that bad. Even with all of those weeks together, he barely knew her, so why was he so attached to her? And how could she not be attached to him after all of those weeks? How could she just leave? Why didn't she tell them she was leaving? Did she enjoy them worrying about her? Did she not care? How could she not care? Did she not know that he cared? He had spent days, even after Barnes had left, to look for her, and he had looked everywhere he could think of, including homeless shelters, but she was nowhere to be found. He had even tried her job, but all that did was revealed that she had lied the day she disappeared as well. If she lied about going to work, what else had she lied about?_

_Taking a deep breath, Steve stared at a picture of Toni before turning the page to a sketch of Peggy. Peggy was beautiful and his drawing of her did not do her justice. Steve didn't know he could like someone else until he met Peggy and he was very grateful to the agent, even if nothing did happen between the two. She had brought a smile to his face, when he needed something to keep him going. He would be lying if he stated she wasn't one of the reason why he was able to become Captain America, even if he was just a show boy. She kept him going._

_Hearing someone calling his name, he closed the stretch book and pushed back his thoughts of Toni and Peggy. He had to focus on the show, which brought in much needed money that would save the soldiers. It did leave a bad taste in his mouth when he thought about the show as even with his super strength, he was still seating on the sideline while soldiers were dying on the front lines._

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Steve exhaled slowly as he entered the Stark Tower, where he had been staying. He had his own place, but he couldn't bring himself to go there in the off chance that he could help here or if by some chance that Toni came back. If she did come back, he wanted to see her as soon as possible; he didn't want to waste any more time. He was going to tell her the truth that he loved her, and then he was never going to let her out of his sight again. He didn't care if she returned his feelings (ok, he did), but if she did, he would be the happiest person on the planet. Regardless of if she returned his feelings, he would never leave her side, even if she threatened him which she would do.

While Banner worked on duplicating the device, the Captain went on a SHIELD mission, which he had taken to get his mind off Toni's disappearance, but it failed to distract him as she was always on his mind. (Though it might've not been a distraction regardless as he was looking for the stole devices.) Thinking about her didn't divert his attention away from the mission too much, and besides no one could take him (well besides Thor or the Hulk) in a fight. He kept thinking about what she would say in retort to the criminal he was trying to catch, and he had to hold back a few laughs as quite a few snarky, smartass things came to mind.

Shaking himself back to the present, Steve took a seat on a couch and stared at a magazine sitting on the table. On the cover was a picture of Toni in one of her many iron suits; her face was visible as she held the helmet in one arm, while the other was firmly at her side. She had a smug look on her face. Steve wasn't surprise with the cocky look as that was the standard Stark look, even her father, Howard, had that look, and though it annoyed the hell out of him, it looked right on Toni's face, a face that he desperately wanted to see.

He flipped to Toni's article and read it as he had done many before. He smiled at Toni's smartass comments and thought about all of the times she had been snarky with him and how he wanted to ring her neck. Her nonstop comments were anything but funny, and they annoyed the hell out of him. He had no idea of how he fell for the spunky brunette, when all she did was insult him, but there was something wild about her, something special. He could see it the second she had decided to fly into the warm hole. It hit Steve hard that someone like Toni would sacrifice her life without hesitation. It was then that he saw her and not her snarky, smartass comments. He could see her compassion.

What made him fall hard were the memories of her in the 1940's, which kept appearing in his mind. Though she still had a smart mouth then, there had been something different about her. She was willing to let him in, unlike in the present where she had shut him out. In the present, she had let everyone else, including Romanoff, in but not him. Why in the hell would she let Romanoff in over him? Romanoff barely liked Toni. Yes, he was jealous over that as it wasn't fair! He had tried to connect with her, but she couldn't have it. It frustrated him to no end. In the past, she allowed herself to have some fun and she included him in it. He had no idea what changed, but he wanted that Toni back. It was hard to remember they were the same person.

However, the chest piece wasn't the only thing similar between them. He had seen the fear in both the present and past Toni, which most people missed. She didn't hide herself in her lab because she was lazy or selfish. She hid, because she didn't want anyone to notice how tired and exhausted she was. She didn't want anyone to see how worn out she was. She didn't want anyone to see that she had weaknesses, that she wasn't as strong as she portrayed herself. She refused to let anyone see that or let anyone in, which was clear by the lack of a personal touch in the Stark Tower. He had not seen one picture in this place, and there was no homey feeling in this place, well if he did not count the lab, where it was clear she had spent all of her time.

Steve exhaled as he stared at the center fold of the magazine. The picture was of Toni, but she wasn't in one of her suits; instead, she was in a simple pink bikini that left nothing to the imagination, even the arc reactor was visible. Her pose was seductive; Toni was laid out on a white chaise lounge (Steve was surprise he knew what that was called). One arm was draped across her stomach, while the other one laid above her head. One leg was out stretched while the other one was bend up. She had a look in her eyes that could draw anyone in, including Captain America.

Though he hated how sexual this time was, he couldn't help but stare at the picture. Toni was breath taking; her body, including the reactor, was perfect. Although he cared for more than just the body, he found himself desiring to touch her; he closed his eyes for a few seconds as he tried to clear his mind. He just wished that everyone else couldn't or hadn't seen her so exposed. He knew it was a completely different time and sex wasn't a taboo, but still. He did _not_ like it. He didn't like it that so many people had seen it.

Taking a deep breath, Steve closed the magazine and set it on the table. He knew since Toni had become Iron Man, she had quiet down and kept a low profile. She had only done a few articles since then, but this was the first time that she had posed for one wearing a bathing suit since getting the reactor. She reminded each of them of this as she shoved the magazine in the Avengers' face.

He smiled as he remembered Romanoff's reaction; she gave Toni a look of irritation that no one could keep a straight face through while saying, "Stark, why in the hell do you think I want to see that." However, Romanoff couldn't keep a straight face either as Toni gave her Toni's famous puppy dog face, which made her break out in laugher. When Toni showed Barton, he couldn't keep a smile off his face (which Steve didn't like at all) and kept turning it to look at it in different angles. It made Steve want to slug that smile right off his face, but that wouldn't be good. Toni wouldn't have approved and it would've earned an ear full from her. Banner, on the other hand, just shook his head at the picture and sighed as he eyed the brunette's big smile.

After he got passed it and even after saying 'he didn't want to see it', he could see that Toni was beaming. Not only was she proud of the article, she was clearly proud of her body. She may not flaunt her body by wearing short skirts or skin tight dresses, but it was clear to everyone around her, even when she wore oversized t-shirts, that she had an amazing body. He may not have agreed verbally whenever she brought it up, though he did confirm it with glances whenever he thought no one was looking. There were a few times he had thought that Natasha and Clint had caught him as he noticed both of their smirks.

Yes, he had it bad…

Hearing someone walk in, he turned to the door and gave a weak smile to Banner. "How's it going, Banner?" Steve asked, turning and resting his arm on the back of the couch.

Bruce gave him a calculated look. Steve, who was still wearing his Captain America uniform, looked like he had been through hell both mentally and physically. "How are you, Steve?" he asked as he stepped toward him.

"I don't think you would like any answer I give you."

"Probably not," he answered as he took a seat in the chair across from Steve. "But I will ask again. How are you?"

Steve glanced at him. "Did you finish the device?" he asked, not answering him.

He eyed Steve. "With Toni's blueprints and JARVIS's help, I was able to finish the device, but I still need a damn power source. Nothing I tried worked." He paused. "I even tried to build one of Toni's reactors, but I failed. I'm not really an engineer like Toni." He let out a chuckle. "That woman is a genius. Not sure how she did it. "

"Toni likes to blow minds," he stated fondly.

"So how are you?" Bruce asked again. He was still eyeing Steve.

"You aren't going to stop asking, are you?" Steve asked. He leaned back and stared up at the blue ceiling, which was outlined in dark wood accents. It had a warm feeling.

Banner leaned back in this own chair and stared at the ceiling as well. "Nope."

Steve glanced at Bruce, who was staring intensely at the ceiling. "How aren't you a mess?"

"Because I'm not in love with Toni. I care for her deeply, just not in love," Banner explained.

The Captain almost jumped at that. "What?!" He paused as he thought about denying it, but it only took him a few seconds to realize that it would be useless. "How did you know?"

Banner let out a small chuckle as he looked at Steve. "At first, I thought I was crazy for thinking it, but I kept seeing things. Toni may have thought you were an ass, which I agreed. You were an ass at times. A major-"

"HEY!" Steve shouted. "I'm not an ass." If anyone was an ass, it was Barton…or even Toni. He was most definitely not an ass. "I was-"

He waved him off. "I know it was because you were protective. You were an ass out of love," he stated with a laugh.

Steve stared at him as he scratched his head. "You know that doesn't make any sense."

"After I got over the shock that you liked Toni, I couldn't help but notice all of the signs, and let me tell you, your unrequited loved is cute and a bit sad. You're like a puppy." He paused to laugh at Steve's red face. "Natasha, Clint, and I are taking bet to when you snap and shove Toni against a wall and kiss her."

"W-wait, what?" Steve stuttered. "Unrequited love? Bet? What?" There were so many things running through his head and he was unsure of what to make of them.

With a smile, Bruce leaned forward in his chair and took a deep breath. "The three of us made a bet of when you would snap and reveal your love to Toni. Clint had already lost. He thought you would've done it when you saw that centerfold of Toni. He was being overdramatic for a reason."

Steve was confused. "He did what?"

"But you didn't fall for it." He stood and crossed to the tablet on the counter. He looked quickly through his emails to see if there was any progress on Natasha's and Clint's search for the stolen SHIELD technology. There was no news so he turned back to Steve, who was staring at the magazine as if it was the only thing in the room. "Natasha picked never. She doesn't think you would ever tell Toni."

"Why is that?" he asked, knowing that Romanoff probably had a point. If he was going to do it, he would've done it already, but things had changed and he couldn't keep it in anymore.

"One-sided love." Steve looked at him as if he was pained by it. "She doesn't think Toni will love you back, granted she doesn't think much of love anyhow so I am not sure if she's a good judge."

That was Steve's fear, but if that was the case, he needed to know, so he could move on. "And what about you?"

"I think you'll tell her, which will probably be as soon as you see her again, and then you probably won't let her out of your sight again, which will just annoyed the hell out of her and she'll probably slap you for it." They both chuckled at that as they knew she would.

"And do you think she'll return it?" Steve asked as he got up and slowly crossed to the long panel of windows. He stared down at the crowd as he thought about their lives. They were the lucky ones; they had no idea of what was going on. They had no idea that Toni Stark was missing. They had no idea of how much danger they were in.

Bruce took a deep breath. "On that, I'm not sure. Toni's hard to read."

Steve closed his eyes. Bruce was correct; she was hard to read, even if he could tell when she was nervous or scared (though she would never admit she was). If he had to guess using all of those insults, she wouldn't return this feelings; however, with Toni, logic meant nothing. With her, insults were a sign of affection.

"So how are the memories?" Bruce asked as he couldn't stand the silence anymore.

"It's getting worse."

"Toni's changing things?"

"Nothing major that I can tell, but things are changing," he answered as he closed his eyes as if he was in pain. His head hurt when he thought about the past and Toni. There were too many conflicting memories. "I still can't remember anything after her flat-lining." He was sick and tired of that nightmare; he wished he could find out what happened after that. Was she alive? Why couldn't he remember?

"Maybe, you should rest," he stated as he stepped toward Rogers.

The Super Soldier glanced at Bruce as he approached him. "I can't sleep," he answered. "My mind won't stop. These memories won't stop." He paused. "I think I can understand why Toni can't sleep and why she's always in the lab."

"Yea, because her mind won't stop," Bruce replied. "Her brain is always moving, always thinking." He had a weak smile on his face. "It's that brilliant mind of hers."

"I don't know how she can function like that."

"How are you functioning?" Bruce paused as he looked the dead tired Rogers over. "How did that mission go?"

Steve took a deep breath as he turned away from the window. "The devices stolen from Black Hawk were there but they were moved. We missed them by an hour or so, but the mission wasn't total waste. We did find something." Knowing that it would not get him drunk, he stepped to the bar. "Do you really think these devices can help?"

"They might, but I need to look at them." Bruce eyed the alcohol in Steve's hand. "So how are you functioning?" He asked again. "Is it wise for you to go on these assignments?"

He had reached for a glass but he decided against it and just drunk out of the bottle. "I'll go crazy if I stay here and do nothing," he stated as he took a drink. He stared at the bottle for a second before completely downing it.

"Steve!" Bruce yelled as he crossed toward the bar in a hurry.

"I can't get drunk anyways," Steve countered as he threw the empty bottom into the wastebasket. He picked up another bottle and took off the cap.

"Doesn't mean you should." He eyed Rogers, trying to read him. "What's happening in that head of yours?"

"It's hard to process the memories," Steve admitted as he took another drink. Although these memories gave him glimpses of Toni, they were a painful experience. They felt real, but at the same time, they felt wrong and fake, and there was no control of them. There was no order to them, and he couldn't get the one that he really wanted. He wanted to know what happen to Toni in that hospital. Seeing a worry look on Bruce's face, he added, "During the war when I found out that the 107 were captured outside of Italy, I went across enemy lines to save them with no care to what happened to myself."

Bruce watched as Steve took another drink. "You saved them single handily. I know about that," he stated. "Everyone knows that. So what?"

"The new memory has Toni in it."

"What?"

"Toni was there. She was captured and tortured by the Red Skull," Steve revealed. It made him sick and mad as he thought about it. How could anyone torture a woman?

"She was… what?" Banner asked, shock. "Why was she there?"

Steve stared down at the half emptied bottle. To learn that Toni was captured tested him. Not only did it scare him, it angered him. How could she go with the 107 into the battlefield? How could she be that stupid? She must've known that she would be captured? Or did she do it knowing that he would save her? Did she have that much faith in him? Whatever the case, he didn't want to feel like that again, though it couldn't compare to how he felt when he saw her falling from the sky. "I don't know. Maybe, she was looking for a way back."

Bruce's eyes opened. "She needs a power source just like I do."

An idea popped in his head. "Do you think…" He trailed off as he thought about the power she would need. There would only be one thing in the past that could have the juice needed.

"I do," he stated as he turned away from Steve and crossed to a phone.

Rogers eyed him as he picked up the phone. He could've asked JARVIS to make the call, but both of them felt weird using the AI. "Who are you calling?" he asked.

"Director Fury. He was trying to contact Toni, using Loki," Bruce answered.

"Loki? Seriously?" he snapped as he slammed the bottle down, shattering it. The alcohol splashed, covering him, but he paid no attention to that. He was too pissed to care. "He almost destroyed New York and we're turning to him?" He didn't want that psychopath near Toni, especially when she was defenseless.

"I get you don't like this plan, but this is the only plan we got."

"No, you can finish that device," Steve countered. Nothing caring to clean up his mess, he stepped toward Bruce. His anger was clearly visible in his eyes.

"Yea, I just need an impossible power source, which I'll never find or get." He paused, eyeing him. "Calm down," Bruce ordered, seeing that the Captain was going to do something that he wouldn't like.

"Calm down? We're trusting a murderer!" Steve yelled, so annoyed that they or SHIELD could dare ask Loki for help. That was no doubt in his mind that Loki would betray them as soon as he could. "What-"

"Relax, Rogers," Natasha stated, interrupting him. Stepping into the room, she had a look of pure annoyance on her face. "Yelling at Banner isn't a good idea."

Bruce stared at her as he knew why she said that. "Him yelling at me won't bring _him_ out," he replied. Romanoff just looked at him. "But I get your point."

Steve only glanced at Bruce before he glared at the assassin, not caring about her annoyance as he was annoyed himself. "I will _not_ relax. We're sending a mass murderer to try and save Stark," he explained, switching to Toni's last name. He didn't feel comfortable saying her first name in front Romanoff. Heck, he didn't feel comfortable saying in front of anyone; he himself could hear how emotional he was when he said her name, which was reason why he stuck to saying Stark. They didn't need to see how emotional he was.

Natasha took a deep breath as she eyed him. "You don't need to worry. Loki struck out. He wasn't able to make contact. He tried a few times." She turned back to Bruce. "Is he okay?" she asked, knowing that she couldn't ask Rogers that.

"It's complicated," Bruce answered, eyeing him from the corner of his eyes.

"I'm right here," Steve said, waving his hand. "And what do you mean when you stated he didn't make contact."

"It means how it sounds. He tried and failed."

"Why did he failed?" Bruce asked.

"He gave Fury some long stupid reason," She answered. "It doesn't matter why. It doesn't change the fact that he couldn't, which means we need that device to work, Banner."

Bruce took a long breath. "I'm working on it. Harder than I thought it would be and I knew it would be hard." He showed his annoyance with a harsh exhale. "Toni couldn't have made this harder if she tried. She loves to make me sweat," he stated with a small smile.

Steven narrowed his eyes at Banner before turning to Natasha. "How can we be sure that he isn't lying?" he asked. He wouldn't put it pass that man.

Before anyone could respond, someone answered from the doorway. "He could be, but what would be his reasoning for that?"

"Why would he help us find Stark?" Steve countered staring down Barton, who was leaning against the door frame. He held his bow in front of him as if he had just gotten back from a battle and hadn't had the chance to disarm. "He has to be up to something."

"Well, if he helps us, it helps his sentence," Clint responded. "But yea, he could be playing us all, but at the same time, he might not."

"And are we going to sit around and do nothing as he tricks us?" Steve snapped. Clint eyed him but said nothing.

Natasha took a deep breath. "Even if he does trick us, there isn't much he can do. Thor is keeping a close eye on him."

"I still don't like it," Steve stated. No matter what any of them said, none of them would change his mind. He was set: Lori was not the answer. He huffed as he crossed the door.

"And who said we did?" Bruce stated as he watched Steve puff angry.

Steve looked back over his shoulder at them. "It sure seems like it," he muttered as he stormed out of the room. He didn't want to listen or talk about this anymore, as it just pissed him off. Seriously, how could they trust Loki? He murdered half the city and countless more, and they were trusting Toni to him? How could they do that?

As he entered the room he had been staying in, he wondered maybe if he was the crazy one. Even though everyone was worried about Toni, he was the only one who was having trouble sleeping. Maybe, the lack of sleep was getting to him and he was overthinking this. Maybe, he wasn't thinking logically. Maybe, help from Loki was the only way. If so, why was he making such a big fuss? Shouldn't they try everything regardless of if they liked it or not?

Shaking his head, he crossed to the mirror in the room and stared into it. He could see why everyone was worried about him; he looked like shit. He looked totally exhausted with those huge bags under his eyes; plus, he was still covered in mud and sweat. "Rogers, you look like shit," he told himself as he turned away from the mirror.

He eyed the bed, wondering if he should try to sleep. There was a chance that he could dream of Toni. Sometimes, the dreams were of the desires he had, but lately, they were just painful memories. Each and every time, they woke him up in a cold sweat and he couldn't get back to sleep once he had them; however, they were insightful. Though it annoyed him that she was messing with the timeline, he enjoyed them, because it was a chance to see her. Maybe, he would learn what the hell had happened to her, though he might not like what he learned. She could be dead…or she could be alive and these memories could be the key that they needed to her get her home.

Steve took a deep breath as he crossed to the bed and sat down; he remembered the first time that he met Toni. He wasn't referring to the time in Germany, when they were fighting Loki; no, he was referring to the time in the empty lot. It was when he didn't know about superheroes, magical items, or aliens. Those were the days that everything had made sense. Though finding Toni in that field did not make sense, he knew what to do and what not to do, well besides falling in in love with Toni, who seemed to hate him. She seemed to like Bucky, who didn't trust or like her, and that just annoyed the hell out of him. He cared for Toni, not Bucky. She should've liked him, not Bucky… Well, she did like him before he came Captain America, but after that, she looked at him differently, and Steve could guess why. Bruce was right: he was an ass.

He exhaled slowly and crawled into his bed, not even bothering to change out of his dirty uniform. Laying on his back, he stared up at the ceiling, thinking about how Toni disliked him, and he couldn't blame her. With the way he treated her, he would hate himself too. One second, he treated her like a spoiled rich girl, who couldn't do anything; and then next, he treated her as something fragile, something that he had to protect. Though he didn't mean to, he made her feel like a child, which was the last thing he wanted. He wanted her to feel safe not trapped.

Steve inhaled slowly. He wasn't sure if it was the altered memories that were doing this to him or what, but he couldn't let anything happen to her, even if Toni couldn't understand why he was doing so. As Steve felt himself drift, he thought about how much he hated time travel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, no Toni in this chapter, but she'll be back in the next chapter, though she won't be a happy camper (not that she was to begin with).
> 
> And poor Steve. His memories are really messing with him and it'll just be getting worse for him. By the end, he'll really, really hate time travel. Haha.
> 
> UNTIL NEXT TIME!


	17. The Nightmare

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I used some of the lines from movie (I think you can pick out those lines :p.

Toni's head was spinning and she had no idea of where she was or what was going on. All she knew was that she was tied to a chair, unable to move, and the ropes and handcuffs were digging into her. It was hard to breath, but that wasn't what worried her. What worried her was the last thing she could recall, which was Barnes being ambushed by hydra Soldiers. She had tried to help him, but she was grabbed from behind, and no matter what she did, she couldn't break free. Before the man had knocked her out, she watched as Barnes was taken to the ground unable to fight the men off. She had no idea what happened after that. He could be seriously hurt or worse dead, but she did know that if one of those asshole hydra soldier hurt him, she was going to beat their asses.

Feeling a cold draft, she broke from her train of thought and forced her eyes open. She was alone in a dark room, which looked like some kind of a lab, and it looked relatively used. Blood strained the floor and walls, and there were large scratches on the tables. What were they doing in this lab?

Toni didn't know, but she didn't like the idea of being in this Frankenstein lab, and she really didn't like that her shirt was opened, exposing the arc of her boobs and the arc reactor. Though she wondered what sick fuck unbuttoned her shirt, she was worried about what they were going to do to the reactor. She couldn't let them have, but there was nothing she could do. _If I can hold out until Rogers gets here, it'll be fine,_ she thought.

Leaning her head back, she focused on freeing her hands from the ropes, though it took only a few seconds to realize that she wouldn't be able to break free of her restrains. It didn't mean she wouldn't look for a way out, because there had to be a way. She refused to believe that there was none. If she gave up, she wouldn't be a Stark.

Shaking her head, she glanced toward the door, but she could barely focus. Her head was still spinning. As she closed her eyes, the door to the room opened and two people walked in. She waited until they entered and the door closed before she opened her eyes. Johann Schmidt didn't take any introducing to know who he was, though it took her a few seconds to realize who the small man. It was Dr. Arnim Zola, the master mind behind the hydra weapons.

"She's awake," Schmidt stated. "I was worried that my soldiers had hurt you. We can't have that now."

Toni glared, not liking the look that he was giving her. Why in the hell was he looking at her like that?

"You do not speak," Schmidt said as he stepped toward. "You have nothing to fear, Corporal Sark, well as long as you tell me what I want to know. I promise I will not hurt you."

Annoying her hatred at being called Sark, Toni snorted, because she knew the bad guy handbook. She knew he was lying; no matter what she said or what happened, she wouldn't be safe. He would kill her after he was done with her.

"I just want to know what that device does in your chest." He paused and looked at Zola. "He believes it would be fatal to remove it." He turned back her. He stared at her as she glared. "You're quite interesting I must say."

She totally did not like the way he was looking at her. It looked like he wanted to eat her. Shaking her head, she turned to Zola, who looked like he was about to crap his pants. Toni could probably yell boo and he would jump; how did that man last long with Schmidt, who looked like he was ready kill at any second? That was the issue with bad guys, you never knew when (not if) they would kill you. She kind of felt sorry, just kind of since they were holding her against her will and all.

Suddenly, Schmidt harshly grabbed her face and forced her to look at him. "It's such a shame." Toni gave him a questioning, narrowing look. "Such a shame that the Americans would send a beautiful woman into the battlefield." He had a hard, bruising grip on her face that she couldn't break. "Are they afraid to face me themselves? I suppose so as much as they sent a woman." He studied her face. "It will be easier to break you, though"

She struggled against him as anger filled her. She wanted to say something smart back but she didn't want to give him the pleasure, though it was so hard to remain silent; she did have a big mouth and all. So hard. Why was every man in this time a sexist pig? Even the criminals were sexist. Where were the nice, non-sexist people of the 1940's?

"Don't you want to save yourself? The Americans will not last against me." He let go of her face. "Tell me about that device is in your chest. I promise I will not hurt you."

Unable to control herself, she opened her mouth. "Repeating your promise won't help! That's what all of the bad guys say before they kill you." She glared before turning to Zola who was staring at the ground. How dare he not look at her when she was held hostage? If he was going to do this, he was going to look at her.

Schmidt turned back to her with a smirk on his face. "She speaks."

Toni narrowed her eyes. "Oh, yes, I do, you asshat."

"And a mouth."

"I'm proud of my mouth." She paused to catch the look in his eyes. "And I won't tell you anything, so do your worst."

"You have faith in these Americans," he stated.

"Well I am an American," she snapped.

Schmidt chuckled at her before he crossed to the door and called for two Hydra soldier. "I am not your enemy, and you will learn this."

"By torturing me? Interesting." Toni replied as she gave him a look. "Very interesting."

"I have never met a woman like you," he stated.

"Which is a shame," she said as she continued to struggle against her restraints.

"I wouldn't consider that a shame," he stated. "Last chance, Corporal Sark. Tell me what this device is and I'll let you go."

She hated that god damn name. She wasn't a Sark, but revealing her real name wouldn't be wise. He wouldn't let her go if he knew she was a Stark. Then there was also the fact that she was a time traveler. "I won't tell you anything."

"Why back a losing team? My forces are far superior in every way," he stated as he stepped back. "You seem to be highly intelligent. I could use you." He paused. "We'll just need to control that mouth of yours."

She so badly wanted to tell him that he was going to lose, that Rogers was going to kick his mother fucking ass, but no, she couldn't say that. She couldn't say anything. She had to sit there and take it, which was extremely difficult considering who the hell she was. Banter was in her DNA. "Don't lie, you totally love it," she responded.

Schmidt looked at her. "You don't know when to be quiet. Maybe, that's why the Americans sent you in. A way to silence you?"

Toni stared at him, because she wouldn't put it pass Salty; however, he was against it. He didn't want her anywhere this man, as he didn't believe it was worth the risk, but it was. She needed one of those hydra cores. They were the only thing in this time period that would be able to power the device, being created from the Tesseract. She knew she couldn't get the cube, but those cores might be close enough. "You could be right," She stated as she watched him cross to the door. "But that isn't it."

"Maybe so, but it does not matter. You will break," he stated as he waved his soldiers forward. "And you will tell me everything. No woman can outlast me."

Toni couldn't watch Schmidt and Zola leave the room as her head was forced back and a bucket of ice water was poured on her face. The water flowed into her nose and mouth, and her eyes were forced shut as the ice pelted her. She let out a sigh of relief when the water stopped; however, that was short lived. She was ripped from the chair and thrown face first into a hot tub of water, which singed her skin.

In her surprise, water surged into her mouth and down her throat. When they pulled her up, she coughed up water and…blood, but before she could gather her breath, they forced her head down again and again. There was no stopping them and Toni lost count of how many times they had dunked her. She struggled, trying to break their grip, but they were too strong. She put her arms out to push against the sides of the tub, but she wasn't strong enough. They dunk her each time without any trouble.

In her struggling, the water rushed into her nose, taking the breath that she was holding. Scared, she tried to take a breath, but the water rushed into her lungs. Panic flew through her because she had no idea if they were going to pull her out of the water that seared her throat. If they were, wouldn't they have done so already? Didn't they know that she couldn't breathe? Did they know that everything was fading? She was starting to lose the feeling of her body.

Worst of all, her panic had started to disappear, and she started to forget why she was scared in the first place. Why was she fighting if her pain was gone? She was free and was no longer scared, so why was she fighting? If she just let go, she would be able to rest. She would be freed of the worry and stress of being alive…wait, why was she feeling this way? She shouldn't be feeling like this. She should be fighting…but she didn't have the urge to. Why? Because she was… Wait, what was her name? She couldn't remember. Why was she here? The last thing she-

The next thing she knew she was being pulled from the hot water and thrown to the ground. Though she was dazed and confused, her body shook, and she coughed painfully as she tried to fill her lungs with air. She choked up the water in her lungs, but she couldn't catch her breath. However, she wasn't able to understand that yet. Her brain didn't start to focus until the Hydra Soldier picked her up and slammed her down on a table, and she couldn't truly understand what was happening until she was strapped.

Toni, whose eyesight was foggy, glanced up at her torturer. His face was blank as if his mind had been wiped and some kind of operating system had been put in its place. It frightened her to think about how he got like that. What kind of thing would do that to another human being and it was that idea that got her scared again. She struggled weakly with the restrains, but her strength was gone. She was unable to anything except to look into the blank face of the soldier, who was checking the restrains.

At the same time, the other one had gone to get a wet clothe and another bucket of ice water. She glanced at the bucket, knowing what was going to happen next. They were going to water-board her, and that stole her breath, which she was struggling to hold anyhow, away from her. Her already weak heart was beating way too fast and she wondered if she was going to have a heart attack; however, she wasn't going to give in. "I won't tell you anything," she croaked. Her voice sounded like someone was stepping on her throat.

"Please, tell them," Zola responded when he stepped toward her. "Tell Schmidt what he wants to know."

Toni turned her heavy head toward him and she stared shocked. She didn't realize that he was in the room; she had thought he had left with the crazy one. "He wants too much," she stated weakly.

Zola crossed to the table and stared at the Arc Reactor. "I do not want to see a woman tortured like this. Please tell us what we want to know." There was some hesitation in his voice.

She tried to laugh but it just sounded like a frog, when it came out. "I won't tell you anything." She paused. "Besides, you can't kill me until I talk and I won't," Toni stated with her voice almost nonexistent. She just had to hold out until Rogers came and saved the day. She knew he was coming; she just have to last that long. She knew she could because they wouldn't kill her…Or maybe, they would…But would it matter if they did?

"That's not the answer I wanted to hear."

Toni snorted. She wasn't known to give the responses that people wanted. "Just do it," she muttered. The thought of it the act had to be worse than the act itself she thought. She was getting herself too worked up and she was losing her breath just thinking of it. At this point, she wanted them to do it.

"Very well," Zola stated as he waved forward the soldier with the bucket and cloth.

Toni didn't have time to think or do anything as the wet cloth was placed over her face, and the bucket of cold water was dumped on her. She tried to scream as the ice water strung her burnt face, but nothing came out; instead, the water filled her mouth, choking her. This time, she thought she was going to die.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Colonel Phillips wasn't a fan of war, but there were parts that he enjoyed more than others. What he was working on was not one of them. He was writing letters to the loves one of the soldiers who were MIA or killed, and it was a draining experience to say the least. Though he knew they couldn't win them all, it cut at him to write these letters. These men were someone's sons. How could he tell someone that their son was dead? What could he possibly say to make it better? There was nothing. Nothing at all. To him, they were an insult…but they had to be done.

He had to write them, but what would he do about Corporal Toni Sark, or rather Toni Stark? She was gone like the rest, except she was different than the others. One, she wasn't supposed to be here. She was a civilian in every sense. Two, she was from the future, and three, should he tell her father? How could he tell her father? He couldn't go up to Howard Stark and tell him: "Hey, your daughter from the future is dead." But he deserved to know, right? His daughter was dead. How did he start that conversation?

Phillips took a deep breath as he stared at the typewriter. Normally, he would have someone else type it up as he spoke, but he couldn't, not with this one. He had to do this himself, because he was only person who knew the truth. However, he wasn't sure why he had to write it, since she knew this was going to happen. She had to have known that his forces would be taken, that his forces couldn't last against Hydra, so why did she go? Was the item she needed so important? It had to be if she needed it to get home, but why would she go on this one? Did she know something he didn't? If he thought about it, her just being here told him too much. They had to have won this war somehow.

Shaking his head, he focused on the letter that he had write. She deserved that much; her father deserved it was well, but he was unsure of how he would give it to Howard Stark. He didn't, however, have time to think about it as Steve Rogers busted into his tent.

"Colonel Phillips," Rogers stated as he busted in.

"Well, if it isn't the star spangled man with a plan. And what's your plan for today?" Phillips asked, annoyed. Why was he here? He didn't have time for this. He had condolence letters to write and he had to figure out what he was going to tell Stark about his daughter.

"I need the casualty list for Rosano," Rogers stated, firmly.

Phillips stared at him for a second, wondering about that tone of his. He didn't like it too much; it had a command tone that he couldn't understand as Rogers had no authority even if he had the title of Captain. "You don't get to give me orders, Son."

Rogers looked taken back. "I just need one name. Sergeant James Barnes from the hundred and seventh."

That stroke Phillips as odd. Did he not know about Toni? Maybe, he didn't know, or maybe, he didn't care, though that would be out of character for the choir boy. He turned to Peggy, wondering if this had anything to do with her as Toni and she didn't get along. "You and I are gonna have a conversation later that you won't enjoy." He was tired of their fights, though it seemed like he no longer had to deal with them.

Rogers took around step toward him. "Please tell me if he's alive, Sir. B-A-R-"

"I can spell," Phillips stated quickly. Though he didn't like to be ordered around, he understood where Rogers was coming from. "I have signed more of these condolence letters today than I would care to count. But the name does sound familiar. I'm sorry." Though he had used Barnes to spy on Toni, he didn't know the man well, but Phillips did feel sad about losing a soldier like that.

"What about the others? Are you planning a rescue mission?" Rogers asked.

Phillips could tell Rogers didn't like the idea of leaving a man behind, but they had no way to save them. "Yeah! It's called winning the war."

Rogers looked at him shocked. "But if you know where they are, why not at least…?"

Phillips knew where Rogers was coming from, but they didn't have the man power for that, and Rogers was too emotional to see that. Maybe, it was a good thing he didn't know about Toni, though he wasn't too sure of their relationship. It seemed like he had a thing for Agent Peggy, which just annoyed him. "They're thirty miles behind the lines through the most heavily fortified territory in Europe," he answered. "But I don't expect you to understand that, because you're a chorus girl."

"I think I understand just fine," Rogers replied, clearly annoyed as he turned to leave.

His mind turned back to Toni and her plan. Why did she go out with the 107? Was this whole thing planned? "I'm surprised you didn't ask me about Corporal Sark," Phillips stated as he ignored the look from Peggy.

Rogers turn back with a confused look in his eyes. "Corporal Sark? I don't know who he is." eHe He

"It isn't a he," Phillips stated as he pulled the fake file that he made for the woman. "You just know her as Toni." He handled it to Rogers. "I'm surprised she didn't tell you."

Rogers narrowed his eyes as he opened the file. His eyes widen at the sight of the picture. "What is this?"

Phillips wondered why he was showing Rogers this folder as it would just make him want to go more. Maybe, that was what Phillips was trying to do, though he wasn't sure why he was doing that. He just couldn't help but think this was Toni's plan to begin with. "I just thought you would like to know. I thought someone would want to know," he answered as he glanced to the letter on the typewriter. "I'm not sure who I should address her letter to. She doesn't seem to have anyone."

Rogers, with an unreadable look in his eyes, tossed the folder back to Phillips. "I think…" He drifted off.

The Colonel glanced at him and decided to let it go. "Well then think it somewhere else. If I read the posters correctly you got some place to be in thirty minutes." He turned his back as to escape the look that Carter was giving him.

"Yes, Sir. I do," came Roger's slow response.

With his back to him and the agent, he didn't watch them leave. He stepped back to the typewriter and stared at the paper for a few seconds before he glanced up in the direction of Carter and Rogers. He did feel bad, but it wasn't anything that he hadn't felt before.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Toni Stark had been tortured before; it wasn't anything new, but this was different. When she was held hostage in the desert being tortured to build weapons, it was nothing like this. They wanted her alive, so she could build the weapons, but this time, she wasn't so sure. Schmidt had said he didn't want to hurt her, but she doubted he would care if she was. He didn't want her to build him anything; he had Zola for that. He just wanted to study her reactor dead or alive, which she couldn't have; however, she doubted if anyone could figure it out.

Once again, she was tied to a chair as her torturers had taken a break, which she was grateful for. She didn't know how much longer she was going to last. She wasn't going to tell them shit, but she didn't know if she could last anything else. She ran out of the energy to fight a while ago, and her body had become a rag doll. She lost count to how many times they had dunked her in hot water, dumped ice cold water on her, and water boarded her. She didn't know what they were going to do, but she would never looked at water ever again. The very thought of water freaked her out.

Her flight impulses started to kick alive, and she fought against her bindings with a surge of mysterious energy. Her head bobbled as she struggled to keep it up. Leaning her back, she opened her eyes and tried to focus on her surroundings, but everything was in a daze. She couldn't make anything out, only seeing shadows. Trying to focus, she tossed her head around as if shaking her head would jolt it awake. For a while, Toni stared blankly at ceiling as she moaned lightly. Her body didn't want to move, but it had to. She had to get out of here; however, even with her fast beating heart, she couldn't muster anything.

"She lives," Schmidt stated as he pushed himself off the wall. "I was worried."

He was still a fuzzy shape for Toni, who could only recognized him by his voice. _What's he doing here_? She thought. He had never watched, always leaving the room whenever they started. She wasn't sure of his reasons, and she didn't really care for his reasons. She just wanted him to die in a blaze of fire.

"I had to remind my men that I do not want you dead," he spoke as he walked to her.

His voice made her tremble, because she could tell he was serious, and there was no doubt that they had almost killed her a few times.

"I am impressed by you, Sark," he stated as he grabbed her bobbing head. She did not have the strength to do anything, even to keep her eyes opened not that she wanted to look at him. "I have not seen many men, who can last through that torture, but you have."

In her exhaustion, his words stared to blend together, and it was getting hard to understand what he had said. His fuzzy shape started to fade into the complete darkness and the feeling of his hand started to disappear. She wasn't sure if it was because he removed his hand from her face or if she was losing feeling of her face. She was voting the latter, because she was fading quickly, and that worried her. Was she dying?

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

The next time that Toni woke, she was alert, which was surprising. She was expecting more torture, but she was alone in the room. The only thing she could hear was her own breathing and the rattling of the chains, and that was a scary thing; she didn't know how to handle this. What did it mean? Were they done with her? Did she tell them something in her haze? She hoped to whoever the hell was upstairs that she didn't, but if she did spill her guts (something she would never ever live down), why was she still live? Surely, she wasn't needed anymore, though she did have a boat ton of future information to give. Or maybe, they were going to drain her dry, and if they did that, she didn't know how, but she knew one thing: they would not be gentle.

Still fighting her sore muscles, it hurt every time she struggled with the chains, and her wounds had reopened in her efforts. "Bastard," she cursed as nothing worked. Only, the chair bobbled in her feeble attempts. "Fuck," she yelled as she couldn't even tip the chair over. She didn't even know why she tried, because she was wasting her much needed energy. She could already feel herself drift and that wasn't good.

"Your resistance is futile."

Toni's head snapped up at the voice; her heartbeat raced as she noticed Schmidt, who was staring at her with such a look that she felt her soul shake. "Are you a Borg now?" She asked.

His eye brow rose. "What is a Borg?"

 _Shit,_ she thought. She couldn't believe that she just said that. "Just my term for an idiot," she answered, trying to cover up the fact that she just referenced a TV show that didn't exist yet. It was a good TV show though.

"Only a fool would mock their jailer," Schmidt stated.

She had been called a fool before, and she would be called a fool again, no doubt by Rogers, but she didn't think being a fool was a bad thing. She was quite proud of her foolishness, and she would never stop. However, the look he was giving her could scare the fool right out of her. "What do you want?" she asked. "If you think you're going to get anything out of me, don't. I won't tell you anything, and you'll be wasting your time." She tried to emotionally ready herself, even if she knew nothing she would do would be good enough.

"I am not going to hurt you," he stated as he stepped toward her.

Toni would've snorted if she could've mustered it. "You and your men had already," she coughed out. Her throat was starting to hurt from all of the talking. When Schmidt reached down to her chains, she almost flipped out of her chair, scared. "W-What are you doing?" she shuttering, annoying herself. She hated how weak she sounded.

He looked at her as he unchained her from the chair, but her hands were still tightly chained together. "I would like to show you something," he stated as he grabbed her by her forearm.

She winked in pain as he pulled her to her feet. With her Jello legs, she didn't think that she would be able to stand, but Schmidt's painful grip kept her on her feet. "What would you like to show me?" she asked as she felt her legs shake.

"Once you see it, you will change your tone," he stated as he was forced her forward. He was half-dragging her as her legs didn't want to work. "You will understand your mistake."

Toni didn't respond as she was too busy trying to keep up with him. He was dragging her faster than she could keep up with, and she kept tripping over her own feet. He didn't say anything but she did catch him looking at her from the corner of his eyes and she could have sworn that he was laughing at her.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Toni fell to her knees as her legs finally gave out. She was surprised that her legs had lasted this long as Schmidt had painfully forced her to walk. Every step hurt and it threatened to overtake her, but the insane crazy man seemed to enjoy her pain. She should've suspect that from him, but she didn't think he was that much of a sadist. She was dead wrong, because he was a sadist in every sense of the word.

She didn't have time to catch her breath as he pulled her back to her feet. "Look at my power," he ordered as he made her look at the glowing weapons that Zola had designed. As his hydra soldiers were creating even more weapons, she wondered how anyone could last against him. How did Rogers beat this man again? "Are you doubting your choice?"

She tried to jerk her arm away from him as she could feel her arm start to bruise, but she couldn't break free from his grab. "Why are you trying so hard?" she snapped. She was too exhausted to be friendly, not like she would've been friendly in the first place.

"You have a bright mind. I hate to see it go to waste," he answered as he pulled her toward Zola who had popped out between two large glowing towers.

Toni stumbled a few steps as pain shot through her legs. She was drained and she could barely keep her eyes open. They hadn't let her sleep and her mind had started to slip; it wouldn't be long before it was gone. "You have no idea of my genius," she mocked.

"Well tell me then," he replied.

"Just kill me then," Toni retorted. It would make it so much easier if she was dead. She wouldn't have to worry about getting back to the future and she wouldn't have to worry about accidently changing the future.

"Not yet." Schmidt dragged her toward Zola, who was checking out one of the glowing cores, which Toni eyed. That was all that she needed.

Zola, who was holding a clip board in his hand, glanced up at Schmidt. His hesitation was clearly visible in his eyes and Toni almost felt bad for him; however, that went out the window in seconds as she remembered that he had helped to torture her.

Schmidt dragged Toni behind him as he stepped toward Zola. "The Americans cannot compete with this!" He stated.

Toni glanced around the room, and she sweated a bit, because Schmidt's forces were impressive. If she didn't know the future, she would be nerviness, but knowing he would fail kept her strong. "Go fuck yourself," she hissed at him. She wasn't going to give in. She promised herself that.

He gave her a look, clearly not happy with her tone. His grip on her hand tightened, but he turned to Zola.

Zola looked up. "As you can see, production and the work here is progressing on schedule even with components of this size." He shuttered it out.

A look of happiness appeared on Schmidt's face. "Increase the output by sixty percent. And speak with our other facilities to do the same."

With each passing second, Toni felt herself get anger. Why was he forcing her to listen to this? It had to be a show, an attempt to get her to see he was superior in every way, but that would not change her mind. Surely, he knew this, because if she didn't bend under torture, she would not bend to his words.

"But these prisoners, I'm not sure they have the strength," Zola stated.

"Then use up what strength they have left, Doctor."

Toni snorted. "And you want me to join you after you said that, Asshat." She wondered if she would turn out like these mindless idiots. She would rather die than be one these thing, because they weren't human anymore.

Schmidt glance down at his prisoner, and squeezed her arm tightly, making her scream. "I did not tell you that you can speak."

"I don't need your permission to speak. You aren't a god," she responded back, but she regretted it a second later as he slapped her hard in the face.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

The next thing she knew, she was being slammed down into a chair, but it wasn't in the torture room. Instead, Schmidt had her tied to a chair in the control room as he looked over what he considered to be his masterpiece. He had a sickeningly smiling on his face as he looked over his creation. "Do you now see how foolish your choice is now, Sark?" he asked with her back toward her.

Toni, even at the point of sheer exhaustion, struggled in her bindings as his very voice was annoying the hell out of her, and she couldn't fucken take it anymore. She couldn't understand why he thought talking to her would change her mind. Maybe, he thought talking to her would work better than torture, and…it might. His voice was so much worse, and his 'I am mightier then you' tone was pissing her off. Beside the fact that she was the only one who could use that tone, how could he talk to anyone like that? He wasn't a god. He was nothing.

To make things worse, she hated the name Sark with a passion, and she couldn't wait to be herself again. "No."

He crossed back to her and grabbed her face again. He had thing about grabbing the face, didn't he? "I'm sorry that I struck you. I forget my strength at times," he stated as he rubbed the huge black bruise on her face. It was surprising that he didn't break her jaw. "Maybe, you will learn to obey."

"I won't obey," she stated as she tried to pull away from him. "I would rather die."

"You impress me, Sark," he said. "I do not wish to break you and make you into one of these mindless fools." He let go of Toni's face and crossed to the control panels.

Toni's head bobbed in her exhaustion, and it hurt like a bitch. She so wished Roger would come soon and beat his ass, because she couldn't deal with it anymore. "Why would you need me?" she asked.

"I don't need you. I want you. With those Americans, that mind of yours is going to waste," he stated. He turned to Zola who was working on something.

"T-that's creepy when you say it like t-that," she replied as she was fighting to stay awake. Her eyelids felt like they weighted a tone.

"That tone-" Schmidt started but was interrupted.

"Sir," Zola called. "We have an intruder." He pointed to a video feed. Schmidt glanced at Toni before crossing to Zola.

Knowing that something had to be happening, she forced herself to awake. She didn't know what it was, but Schmidt was flipping switches. "What's going on?" she asked as she started to hear a racket outside of the control room. The louder the sounds were, the more she was convinced it was Rogers.

"Sir," Zola uttered as he watched Schmidt flip every more switches. Toni didn't know what these switches did, but she could hear a clicking sound.

"They are clearly outmatched," the insane freak stated as he pointed to the screen. She couldn't see, but it had to be Rogers.

"But Sir," Zola questioned.

Schmidt stepped to Toni, snapped the restrains that held her to the chair, and pulled her to her feet. "We're leaving, Doctor. Gather your things and let's go." He pulled Toni toward the door, causing her to trip over her own feet.

Toni could feel his glare on her back as she struggled. Her bruised body felt like it was on fire each time he forced her to move, and to make matters worse, she was having a hard time breathing. She didn't know if one of her ribs was broken, but it hurt. She hoped Rogers would sock him one for her, because she knew she would break her hand if she tried.

"Let me go," she begged. If she didn't get away from him now, they would take her and there would be no end. If she wasn't saved, she knew she would cave and tell him everything.

Schmidt forced her to her feet again. "Why would I do that? With Zola and you, there's no stopping me."

That took her breath away, because that was the last thing that she had expected. She wasn't quite sure what she was expecting, but that wasn't it. She wasn't sure what he was judging her genus on, because he only saw her reactor and heard her smart ass mouth. Maybe that was enough. Whatever it was; it didn't matter. What matter was getting away, though she was beginning to wonder if she could.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Barnes had lost track of time and what was happening to him, but he could tell that someone was standing over top of him. The shadow started to take shape after it had started to shake him. "It's me, Steve," the shadow stated.

That name sounded familiar to him. "Steve?"

"Yes, it's me," the voice stated as he pulled Barnes into a sitting position. "Let's go."

Barnes narrowed his eyes and the shape started to morph into his best friend. What was he doing here? "Steve."

"I thought you were dead," Steve replied as he helped him to his feet.

Barnes knew he had to be losing it; he had to have gone crazy. There was no way Steve was that big. The Steve he left at the apartment wasn't even half the size of the man in front of him. How could he have possibly gotten that big? If he believed in magic, he might've believed that Steve was a witch doctor of some kind. "I thought you were smaller," he finally said as Steve came into focus.

Barnes was amazed to how easily that Steve had picked him up and how unaffected he was by his weight. How did this happen? "What happened to you?" he asked, unable to help himself.

"I joined the army!"

Steve was never one for long explanations, but Barnes expected something more from him. "Did it hurt?" He wasn't sure what else to say.

"A little."

He was a man of little words and it annoyed Barnes. "Is it permanent?" he asked, trying to get something out of him.

"So far," he replied as he helped him to the door. "We have to get going, Bucky."

Steve's nickname for Barnes snapped him out of his fog; he had completely about Toni. How could he forgot about her? It should've been impossible with that loud snarky mouth of hers. "Toni," he stated. He wasn't sure how Steve would react to this, but he had to know. "She's here. Schmidt has her."

"I know," he stated through his teeth.

"Steve," he uttered as they stepped out of the room.

"How could you let her come?" he snapped.

Barnes was beating himself up over that, but there was no way he could've stopped her. Toni had a mind of her own and there was no telling her anything. "She wouldn't listen," he replied. "I tried, though I wish that I had tried harder." The image of her being grabbed from behind and knocked out by a hydra soldier was burnt into his mind. He couldn't get rid of the feeling that he failed as he watched her be taken. He felt like shit and he couldn't get rid of that feeling.

"I'll save her," Steve stated.

"We'll save her," Barnes corrected

Steve glanced at him as they made their way through the rumbling base. "No, I'll save her; you just need to get out of here."

Barnes did not like his tone at all; he made it seem like it was all his fault. Sure, he had some part to blame in this, but he did try to talk Toni out of this. She wouldn't listen to him and he couldn't stop her. "I'll leave when we find her."

He stated at him for a few seconds. "Fine," he agreed as flames started to engulf the base, which signaled that they did not have time to fight. They had to get the hell out of this place.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

The flames and smoke forced them to the rafters as the entire building was being eaten by the flames. Barnes had wondered if they would ever be able to find Toni and get the hell out of this place. With each passing second, the flames had gotten worse, and the building started to shake and fall apart around them. As they stepped onto a higher level, another rumble echoed throughout the base, sending Barnes to the knees. Steve was able to stay on his feet. "Are you okay?" he asked.

Barnes pushed himself up. "Yea," he stated. Steve had been awkward with him since he had found him in that room. He didn't know how to handle Steve when he was like this. "Let's keeping going," he said as he used the railing for support. Steve nodded as they continued down the long rafters.

It was only a few minutes later, when the control room came into sight, but it wasn't the room that caught his sight. What caught his eyes was Toni, who looked like hell even from this distance. Schmidt had a firm grip on her arm as he held her close. He couldn't even see space between them, and that pissed off Bucky. He didn't care that he was the enemy; he shouldn't be holding her like that. In her struggling, he could see multiple bruises on her body, but it was the black eye that stuck him hard. How dare he touch her? He was going to hit him for each mark on her body. No, wait, he was just going to kill him just for that huge bruise on her face.

Barnes glanced toward Steve, who stiffed at the sight of her as well. Steve's hands were balled and they were shaking. "Schmidt," Steve called. Anger was presented in his voice.

"Captain America! How exciting!" He stated as his grip on Toni's arm slipped, sending Toni to the ground hard. It was clear that she was unable to stand on her own.

Barnes's glance went back to Toni for a second before turning back to Steve, whose nails were digging into his skin as he watched her struggle in pain. It was clear that she was hurt worse than she appeared, which pissed them both off.

Steve and Schmidt walked toward each other on the long bridge. "I'm a great fan of your films." He paused as he looked him over. "So Dr. Erskine managed it after all. Not exactly an improvement, but still impressive."

Steve glanced at him for a second before turning to Toni. His eyes focused on her bruise, an unforgivable bruise.

Schmidt smiled as they came within a few feet of each other. "I see."

"You see what?"

"Your affection for this woman," he waved back toward Toni. There was a sick look on his face when he looked at her.

Steve's shoulders tensed.

"You believe-"

The Super Soldier didn't let him finish as he punched him in the face. "You got no idea." His eyes went to Toni for a split second; however, in that second, Schmidt struck. Steve threw his shield up to block but his weak shield was no match, and Schmidt's fist indented Steve's shield, shocking Steve. He was no weakling.

"Haven't I!" Schmidt kicked Steve, knocking him to the ground. Steve reached for gun, but it was knocked away leaving him defenseless. "Your humanity makes you weak." He reached down to Steve.

Barnes couldn't take his eyes off the fight between Schmidt and Steve, who seemed to be losing this fight. It was shocking to Barnes because he didn't think it was possible for Steve with his new strength to lose. If Steve did lose, he had no idea of how he would get out or save Toni. _Toni,_ he though as he turned toward her, but she was gone. _Where did she go?_ He thought franticly as he tried to look for her. He didn't have the time to look as the rafters shock, almost shaking his legs out from underneath him again. The building was about fall.

"No matter what lies Erskine told you, you see I was his greatest success!" Schmidt yelled as the rafters were suddenly pulled a part, separating the two from each other. It wasn't the rafters that startled Steve and Bucky, it was Schmidt, who had peeled off his skin on his face to reveal his red skull.

Barnes stared. "You don't have one of those, do you?"

"You are deluded, Captain. You pretend to be a simple soldier, but in reality, you are just afraid to admit that we have left humanity behind. Unlike you, I embrace it proudly. Without fear!" He yelled.

Steve narrowed his eyes. "Then how come you're running?"

Schmidt crossed to the door. "I do not have the time to waste. Zola, Sark, and I have things to do."

At hearing that, Barnes' heart raced. "You aren't going anywhere with her," he snapped. He didn't care that he was hurt; there was no way they were taking her, but he had to find her first. She was gone, which was a good thing, as they couldn't hurt her anymore. His only hope was that Schmidt wouldn't find her.

Schmidt glanced toward Barnes. "He fancies her as well. He might steal her from you, Captain. How do you feel about that?" he asked as he turned to the door.

Steve, almost forgetting where they were, tried to take a step forward in his anger, but he realized when he put his foot down and stumble that he couldn't go after him. "You aren't going anywhere."

"It is not time for our fight, Captain," the Red Skull stated as he turned. "You are not ready. You are foolish for you are controlled by your emotions."

Barnes, trying to ignore the comments of the Schmidt unlike Steve, watched the Doctor, who was trying to get Schmidt out the door.

Schmidt suddenly looked around as he noticed Toni was gone, but they did not stay to look for her, like he wanted. Zola was able to convince him to leave without her, as the flames started to jump higher, almost licking them.

"What are you doing?" Barnes asked, frantically, as he noticed Steve backing up.

"Toni," he said, looking at Barnes.

"She got away when Schmidt was fighting with you," he tried to explain.

"I can't leave her." Steve scanned the room looking for some clue because Barnes was right. Toni didn't leave with Schmidt, but she was still missing and she could be in danger. They had to find her before Schmidt, but they had to get out of here as well, because the building was coming down around them.

Though he was unsure of what exactly Steve was thinking, he knew it had to be the same thing as him. It hurt like a bitch to leave without Toni. He had to watch her be taken, and now he had to leave her. He failed her again.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Toni had no idea of how she was able to crawl away because her body felt like it was on fire. Maybe, it was on fire? Every time she moved, pain shot through her, but she kept going. If she didn't, Schmidt would catch her and she would be tortured again. She couldn't last another round.

She took a painful breath as she continued to crawl. Originally, she never thought she would be able to get away from Schmidt, but she supposed it was Rogers, who made it possible. He had distracted Skully long enough for her to get away, but she wasn't safe yet. She either had to get out of this roasting building or she needed to find Rogers or Barnes, who made her heart skip at the sight of. Though she knew he going to die, she didn't know when he going to die; this could've been the day that he did, and that hit her hard. Man, since when did she become such a girl?

Shaking her head, she continued her crawl as the ground shook below her. "Assfuck," she cursed as another rumble sent her to her knees. "I hate this." Yet another shake rocketed through the building, keeping her still. She closed her eyes as she was hit by the overwhelming heat. If she didn't hurry up, she was going to go down with the building. Toni pushed herself onto her knees and forced herself forward.

To add to her struggle, it wasn't long before she came to a fork in the road. In her daze, she wasn't able to put her thoughts together and figure out what to do; she couldn't wrap her mind around anything. Also, the smoke had clouded her vision and she was barely able to make anything out, though she didn't know it was the smoke or her vision blacking out, but either way, it wasn't good. To make things even worse, her throat felt like it was on fire. She was coughing as she breathed in the heavy smoke. She was losing her energy rapidly.

Toni smacked hard against the ground, and this time, she wasn't able to push herself up. In fact, she couldn't feel her body. Did she even have a body? She couldn't even tell if she was breathing and that should've scared her if she had truly understood what was going on. Her mind, which hadn't been at an hundred percent for a while, had drifted into the smoke, and there was no down or up anymore. _Toni,_ her thoughts, or what she thought was her thoughts. She wasn't sure anymore. At least, the pain was gone thought, right?

 _Toni!_ There it was again. Was that her name? She thought it was, but now, she wasn't sure. Why would that be her name? It wasn't a very girly name nor was it pretty…Wait, was she a girl? She could've been a boy, though Toni was not a very good boy's name either. Seriously, who named her? Why would they name her that? It was an ugly name. Could she-

 _Toni, please wake!_ There was that voice again, but this sounded closer, like she could reach other and touch it. In fact, someone was touching her, because she could feel something cold around her. She wasn't sure if someone had picked her up or if something had happened and she was dead. Did she move on? She wasn't sure but the person calling her name would not shut up.

"Toni, please wake up. Please," the voice called loudly. She wasn't put off by his voice as she was too busy trying to learn how to breathe again. Then all of the sudden, the air came rushing back to her lungs, almost overwhelming her, and she started to cough violently.

"Toni!" the man, which she could tell now, yelled as he held her tightly. "Breath. You need to breath."

She didn't know why that was so hard to do, but it was. Was it really that hard to breathe? Her mind wasn't kicking back like the pain was. She felt like she was on fire again.

"Come on. Stop being Stubborn. Breath, you fool!" This was a different voice, and this voice annoyed her in less than two seconds. She was no fool and she would prove it.

"Shut it," she cursed out painfully.

"Toni," one of the voices, she wasn't sure which, said. She felt a hand on her face.

She was sick of hearing that name. "Shut it," she cursed again as she drifted over into unconsciousness.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE END
> 
> FOR NOW.
> 
> Poor Toni. Do you think she will ever be the same? :( And I so think Toni would be a trekker.


	18. The Nickname Chase

**Chapter 18:**

**The Nickname Chase**

* * *

Toni's head was fuzzy and she couldn't make out heads or tails of what was going on. She could tell they were on the move but all she could hear was distant voices, and there were a lot of voices, most of them were unknown to her. At first it scared her, not knowing who these voices belonged to, but she heard a familiar man's voice. His voice calmed her and she knew she was safe. She didn't know what about his voice calmed her, but it did. So the more he talked, the better. While resting in someone's arms listening to him (she wasn't sure if it was him holding her), she allowed herself to drift. As she rested, her mind was becoming less fuzzy, and she was able to make out what was going on around her.

"How much longer?"

"A few hours or so. It shouldn't be much longer."

"Good." There was a pause. "And she hasn't awoke yet?"

"She hadn't stir."

The voices were getting louder, interrupting her rest. She needed to sleep, damn it. Toni groaned as these voices were giving her a headache. Why couldn't they shut it? Why was there so many voices? She just wanted to listen the one.

"Is she okay?" She could hear the concern in his voice.

"She will be," another voice responded.

 _So many voices!_ She thought. It was hard to make out was going on, but she could recognize Rogers' voice and he sounded annoyed which was a state she hardly heard from Mr. Perfect. He usually wasn't so stressed, and it was that fact that stuck her. It also surprised her to how much it meant to hear that, because it meant he was human.

"You-"

But Toni was sick of their conversation. They were loud and annoying. How could anyone sleep through it? "So loud," she moaned as she tried to open her eyes. Her eyes lids weight a ton.

The man, who were holding her, slowed down his pace. "Toni," he stated softly.

Her eyes flicked. "Rogers," she said, fighting to speak. She was so exhausted that she could barely stay awake. "You sound h-horrible."

Toni could feel his hold on her tighten. "You sound horrible," Rogers responded.

She didn't know what to make of his tone, but he was correct. She sounded like a frog. "You aren't a shrimp a-anymore," she muttered, making out his large form. He was Captain America again-which meant he was an asshole again.

"Not anymore," he stated. His voice was strained.

There was something about his voice that threw Toni, but she pushed it aside. She didn't need to worry about that.

"Shrimp? Did she call you a shrimp?"

Toni almost jumped in Rogers' arm at that voice. "Barnes," she croaked. She tried to look at him but her body screamed out in pain. "You're alive."

He said something back to her but they were just words, as she faded back into darkness. However, she could rest in peace as she was safe and Barnes was alive, though she would give him hell the second she came to.

* * *

*0*0*

* * *

Toni didn't know what she was dreaming about when she came to, but she remembered the tone of her dream, and it felt different than the dreams she had in the past. This dream had been relaxing and calm, which was something that she hadn't had in years. Her dreams, one of the reasons why she hadn't sleep well, had been nightmares for as long as she could remember. She didn't have good dreams. They weren't apart of her DNA, but somehow she had a good dream, even if she was unable to remember what it was about.

However, that good feeling didn't last long as she groaned, trying to open her eyes. It was too painful to move and her eye felt like it was fire. Her left side of her face where Skully had hit her felt huge and she could barely feel that side of her face. "Asshole," she muttered as she imagined what she looked like. She probably looked like a balloon and Peggy was probably going to mock her. She groaned in pain again as she tried to roll.

It was that roll, which made Toni realized that she was on the cold hard ground. She moaned as her bruised face bumped against the ground. Why the hell was she on the ground? Why did Rogers put her on the ground? She was going to give that asshole a talking to, because he should at least have found a softer spot to put her down.

Toni forced her eyes opened and took a look around, almost jumping at the sight of a man a few feet away.

"Ah, you are a wake."

Though her left eye was useless making it difficult to make anything out, she was able to see that this man was not Barnes or Rogers. It worried her at first, because she had no idea of who this was or the where the hell Barnes or Rogers were. Why would they leave her alone with someone she didn't know? She tried to glance around but the muscles in her neck hurt and she couldn't muster it through the pain.

"Are you look for the Captain and Barnes?" he asked as he looked at her. "They're checking on something. They'll be back soon."

Her eye sight started to focus and she was able to make out the man. He was an average size man, and if she had to guess, he was slightly over 6 feet. "Who are you," she asked; her voice quaked as she spoke. She was barely able to get her words out.

"Gabriel Jones. Gabe for short," he stated as he stuck out his hand to her, but she made no motion to shake it. "Rogers asked me to keep an eye on you while he's gone."

His name sounded familiar to her, but she couldn't place it. "I don't need a baby sitter," she stated as the pain was getting to her.

"No one said you did," he replied with a smile. "Let's see if I can find Barnes or Rogers for you." He got to his feet.

Toni watched as he walked away and disappeared into the crowd. She took a look around, as she had no idea what was going on, and she didn't like it. Sure, she recognized some of these guys from camp, but that didn't mean she knew what was going on. They appeared to be stopped somewhere in the wilds, nowhere near camp. _But you know how this story turns out_ , she told herself. She knew it was stupid to be worried, but she blamed it on the pain, clouding her judgment.

Trying to get a better look, she pushed herself up through the pain. There were a few odd tanks that looked out of place, but it was the men, who caught her attention. There were so many of them and each looked like they had been through hell; however, they probably looked better than she did, which wasn't fair. "Goddamn it," she cursed. She fell back again; she tried another but the same thing.

"Toni, what are you doing?"

She glanced up to see Barnes, who was a sight for sore eyes. "Barnes," she called. "What happen to you? You look disgusting." She teased. "You make me feel better about myself."

He laughed as he kneed down next to her. "I think you're fooling yourself," he started. "Have you seen what you look like?" He was looking at her as if she was going to break.

"Geez, thanks," she replied as she glared at him. He was teasing and that wasn't allowed. That was her job. "So where's Rogers?" she asked, changing the subject.

"He's around." He paused. "He's talking to some of the men." He was staring at her again with those eyes. "We're almost at camp. Only a few more miles."

Toni could tell he wanted to ask or say something, but he was holding back. "Good," she stated. She may have not gotten the core from one of those hydra guns, but she did see quite a few that she could lift. "Help me up," she ordered.

"You can't give me orders." She glared. Barnes gave her another look as he hesitatingly helped her to her feet. "Maybe, you shouldn't get up," he said as he watched her curse in pain.

"Don't baby me, Barnes," she said as she slowly got to her feet. Her legs wobbled under her, forcing her lean on Barnes for support.

"I'm not babying you," he said as she put her weight against him. "Just worried." He held her close to keep her on her feet. "You had us all worried." He glanced at her, focusing on her discolored face.

"You were captured too," she stated as they walked in the direction of Rogers.

"Yea, but I wasn't the center of attention of a crazy man," Barnes replied as they walked slowly.

Toni glanced up, looking him over. "Skully isn't that scary." She tried to shrug it off as nothing. She didn't need them worrying.

"Skully?"

"Schmidt's nickname," she answered as Rogers came into view.

"So everyone gets a nickname but me?" he laughed.

His laugh was comforting, but she wouldn't tell him that. "You have nickname already," she stated.

"But you don't call me by it," he whined.

"You have to earn it," she stated as she stuck her tongue out at him.

"Oh, I will," he stated with a cheesy smile. "I-" Barnes started.

"Toni, Bucky," Rogers called as he noticed them.

Toni pushed away from Barnes slightly as she watched the Super Solder walk to them. For taking on a base filled of hydra soldiers, he looked unharmed, which was pretty damn amazing. She had to give it him, without really giving it to him, because that outfit wasn't helping. He looked like an idiot wearing it, but he liked it for some odd reason. "Geez, Rogers. You look to be in one piece unlike that shit you're wearing," she said as she eyed his ripped jacket.

Rogers gave her the look of disapproval, which was normal for him. He was always giving her that look. "I see that bump to the head didn't affect you." Again, there was something in his tone that Toni couldn't place. It was like he was mad or something, though it could be because he was Captain America again. "Shouldn't you be resting?"

She didn't care for his voice. Seriously, what the hell happened to make him such an asshole? _Well, you did leave him high and dry,_ a voice inside of her head said. Barnes mentioned that Rogers spent days looking for her; he had to pissed, but he needed to get over it. "I don't need to rest." She hobbled toward Rogers. "You worry too much."

"I don't worry too much," he snapped back. "Considering what had happened, I worry enough." He was clearly angry with her.

"Geez, relax," She stated as she waved it off.

"I-"

Barnes stepped between them. "You know you two are ridicules," he stated. "You didn't need to fight with each other."

Toni glanced at him before looking at Rogers, who was staring at her with those stupid blue eyes of his. "I think it-" Before she could finish, Barnes picked her up. "What the hell?" she stated.

"Time to go," Barnes said.

Ignoring the pain, she glanced at Rogers who was staring away. "Put me down," Toni ordered. Not only did she not want to be picked up, but his grip was hurting her already injured body. "Barnes, put me down. This is not how you get a nickname!" She yelled as she hit him lightly.

"Let's go," Barnes stated.

"You're hurting me," she said, hoping that it would get him to put her down. "Don't make me beat you."

He chuckled. "I thought you didn't want me to baby you," he said, stepping away from Rogers with Toni in his arms.

Toni was sending him the death glare to end all death glare. He was doing this just to piss her, and it didn't help that she was already pissed. "You just want it," she stated as she struggled in his arms.

He gave her a smirk. "Anything from you," he stated. He was an endless flirt, just like her, but there was a way about him that drove her crazy.

She slapped him harder. "Put me down," she ordered as she glanced at Rogers who had turned away. She could see the tension in his shoulder, reminding her of the present day dick Rogers. Was this when he turned into an ass? She missed her shrimpy Steve, who had a heart of gold; she missed his sweetness, which could touch anyone's heart. Right now, he was acting cold, and it pissed her off as she had no idea of why he was acting his way. Sure, he could be mad that she disappeared but she didn't understand why it pissed him off so much.

Plus, what did he have to be mad about? He saved a heck ton of soldiers, including his best friend. He should be on top of the world because _he_ was making a difference. He was finally doing what he wanted to do: saving people. So why was he so angry? He shouldn't be this angry. He had no right to be angry.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Toni was going to puke and it wasn't because she was sick. It was because of Agent Sassy Pants and the giant Shrimp and their sickeningly lovey-dovey looks that they were giving each other. It made her sick. Why did they have to look at each other like that? They weren't horny teenagers; they were in a fucken war. There was no time for that shit…. _Wait, why do I care?_ She asked herself. It shouldn't matter to her what they were doing, because once she was back in the future, none of this would matter. It wouldn't matter what they said or did, or whether they making out. None of it would matter, so why did she care? She shouldn't care. She really shouldn't.

Limping, she made her way through the base as she looked for her beloved father, who she had an urge to choke. Once they got back, Howard had taken the cores to study as he had no idea of how they worked. He wanted to test them before he let anyone else touch them, which annoyed her. She didn't have time to wait; she needed one of those core to use with her device, so she could get the hell home and not have to look at those two love birds.

"Sergeant Barnes said that Hydra shipped all the parts to another facility that isn't on this map." Toni's eye twitch in annoyance at the sound at Rogers' voice, which seemed to carry on for miles. What was it about his voice that did this? It was so loud and annoying.

Shaking her head, she stepped into the debriefing room. The room was filled with Soldiers, and most of them were circled around a table with a map. Rogers was pointing to something, but it wasn't what he was pointing at that caught her eyes. It was his uniform, and how good he looked… _Wait? What?_ She took her head, because she mustn't think of how good the jerk Shrimp looked in his uniform, though she wasn't sure why he didn't wear this thing more often. He looked hot. _Stop it! Stop looking at him,_ she yelled at herself.

"Agent Carter co-ordinate with MI6," Colonel Phillips stated as he leaned over the table.

Toni's eyes switched again, which was quite painful as her left side of her face was sore and any movement hurt. Her face was turning into a deep shade of purple and black. "Figures," she stated, glancing at Peggy. Right now, that Agent was pissing her off. Sure, they didn't get along to begin with, but lately, she was pissing her off just to piss her off. If Rogers was Mr. Perfect, Peggy was Mrs. Perfect and she couldn't take that.

Phillips glanced at her and eyed Toni's bruise for a few second as if he found it insulting. "I want every ally looking for that main Hydra base."

"What about us?" Rogers asked.

"We are gonna set a fire under Johann Schmidt's ass. What do you say, Rogers? It's your map, you think you can wipe Hydra off of it?" There was a smile on Phillips' face that Toni hadn't seen before.

"Yes, sir. I'll need a team," Rogers replied.

Toni did her best to hide her limp as she crossed to the table. She didn't need anyone to notice it, because whatever was happening, she needed to be a part of it. This could be her way to get a core, though she would have to deal with the fact that Barnes and a few other good men were going to die, which she wasn't sure if she could.

"We're already putting together the best men," Phillips answered as he stepped to the side to allow Toni a better view. He eyed her as if she was able to fall over.

That pity annoyed her, because it wasn't needed. These injures were nothing, and she could deal.

"With all due respect, sir. So am I," Rogers said.

Toni closed her eyes are she tried to think. If she remembered correctly, this was when the howling commanders were formed, and that was an interesting group so she heard.

"I-" Phillips started

"Are you okay, Sark?" Peggy asked, interjected. "Maybe, you should be laying down."

"I'm fine," Toni stated. "Just thinking." Not even a few seconds later, she felt a present over her right shoulder and she knew it was Rogers. "I'm fine, Captain."

"You should be resting," he said. He placed a hand on her shoulder. "You're hurt. Schmidt had-"

Toni waved him off. "I am peachy." She winked in pain again as she turned from him. "Why don't you get your team together?" she said, trying not to snap; however, her tone was pretty clear. She blamed it on the pain. Rogers looked like he wanted to say something, but he just walked away. Peggy followed him for a few steps before she turned back to Toni. Most of the room had cleared with him.

"You know you shouldn't be so mean," Phillips said as Peggy brought over a chair. He glanced at the doorway that Rogers disappeared through.

"That wasn't mean. You hadn't seen my mean." She paused as she turned to Peggy. "Aw, you know it's bad, when you're nice, Sassy," Toni teased as she sat down. She never thought a chair would bring her so much joy, as she couldn't help but smile when she sat on it. She didn't realized how tired she was until she sat down. Her hands went to her pulse to check her heart beat, which was beating a few beats too fast.

Peggy's raised an eyebrow but didn't respond; however, Salty did. "I'll blame that on the pain."

It made Toni feel somewhat salty, but she didn't say sorry, like she never did. She wasn't really sorry for anything, well besides leaving the shrimp Rogers without a good bye. She glanced up at Phillip saying something to Peggy, who nodded and stepped away. Toni knew what this meant. He wanted to talk. "What, Salty?" she asked softly, as he wouldn't want to hear them.

Phillip glanced at her. "Are you okay?" he asked. Even if with cargo pants and a long sleeve shirt, he could still see that her body was lined with bruises and cuts. "Being tortured isn't anything to take lightly."

"I know," she stated. If she wasn't already damaged by the nightmares, she would be worried, but she wasn't. Her mind and soul were already damaged.

"So how are you really?"

"Just ask what you really want," she stated as she tried to get her heartbeat down.

He looked at her. "I never got to debrief you on what happened."

Toni tried to stand up, but her legs gave out and she fell back. "He thought he could use me, after he saw my reactor," she spoke, pointing at her chest. "He also found it funny that you send a woman." She felt her face, trying to feel how bad it was. She had resisted the urge to look in a mirror, as she didn't want to see how bad. It had to be bad since she had a hard time seeing out of her eye and her jaw hurt whenever she spoke, which was horrible as she loved to talk.

Phillips took a deep breath. "I didn't want to send you out."

"I know." She stated. "But it doesn't change the fact that he wanted to use me. He thought he could convince me to join him." She tried to force out those memories out of her mind as she could feel still the cold water hitting her face.

"What did you say to make him hit you like that?" he asked.

"I told him he wasn't a god," she answered.

"Yea, I bet he wasn't happy to hear that," he chuckled as he kneed down next to her. He grabbed her face and turned softly to look at the bruise that took up half of her face. "Doesn't look pretty. Maybe you should go see a doctor."

Toni snorted. "I did, but he was useless." She only saw a doctor because of Barnes and the stink eye that Rogers had been giving her; however, he was useless, only giving her pain pills.

"You should-"

Peggy came back with a glass in her hand. "You look like you need something to drink," she said, holding the glass out to Toni. "And some sleep."

Toni glanced at her before turning to the glass filled with water. The very thought of water freaked out and she could barely look at it, without feeling sick. "I got to go," she stated as her heart beat started to race. She stood quickly.

"Relax, Sark," Peggy stated, realizing something must've set her off. She reached a hand out to steady her, but Toni shoved it away. "Come on." Her voice rose. "You need to sit back down. Don't be so hard headed."

Phillips laughed again. "Impossible for Sark."

Shaking her head, she tried to gain control of her senses, but she couldn't. The water in the glass was mocking her and she needed to get away. Without a second though, she bolted. She could handle the pain, but that glass was affecting her more. The thought of water on her lips brought her back to that state of being tied down and she couldn't bare that.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

"You shouldn't drink alone."

Toni exhaled. "So I hear," she muttered. She was a mess, both physically and mentally. She hadn't washed up since getting back to camp, only using wet towels. She couldn't bring herself to take a shower or turn the water on. She couldn't even look at a faucet, without going into a panic attack. However, she told herself that she should be happy as she wasn't thinking of her stalker. If he could get her now, she would award him.

Barnes took a seat next to her at the bar. "I don't think I can judge you considering I was going to drink alone too," he stated as he waved the bartender over. He ordered a drink before turning back to her. "You should be resting."

Toni winced in pain as she turned to him. "I don't need to rest." She was tired of everyone telling her that; she didn't need to rest. She didn't want to rest. She wanted to get going; she wanted to be on the move. " _You_ look like a mess," she said as she looked him over. He was the one who Rogers found strapped to a lab table. " _You_ need to rest."

"Why do you have to be so hard headed?" Barnes asked.

"Runs in my family," she stated as she thought back to her father. He was the most stubborn man that she had ever met, and even now, he was one of the most stubborn person she had ever met and that included Barnes and Rogers.

Barnes raised an eyebrow. "You like being a handful."

Toni smiled though the pain. "Yes, I do."

"You know you don't have to smile if you're in pain," he said, noticing her twitch.

"I-" A cheer down the bar caught her attention, and she turned to the table that the cheer came from before rotating back to Barnes. At the table was Rogers, who she would only consider an ass always trying to tell her what to do. He would probably yell at her for drinking. "Don't knock my smile."

"You know, you two fight like an old married couple," Barnes stated as he took a drink.

"Old married couple?" She questioned as she narrowed her eyes at him. "A married couple? That's what you come up with?" Why did she find that so insulting? "We aren't anything close to marry."

Barnes raised his hand up as if in self-dense. "Geez, relax." He paused. "Let's talk about something else."

Toni glanced back at Rogers for a second before spinning back to Barnes. "I don't want to talk about Skully either," she stated. She had talked about that man enough, and she didn't want to give him any more power than he already had.

"Okay," Barnes stated. "What about the fact that you hadn't given me a nickname yet?"

She laughed. "You're still on that?" It hurt to laugh, but she didn't care.

"Yep," he stated, smiling. "I want a nickname."

"Again, you have one!"

He chuckled again. "Not from you."

Toni just stared at him for a few seconds. He had that smile on again that could make her melt. "You really want one from me," she stated shocked. She couldn't understand why it was so important that she gave him a nickname.

"You even gave one to Schmidt, but not me," he whined, playing the hurt card with his hand on his chest.

She shook her head. "You better be careful or I'm going to give you a nickname that you don't want!" She stated as she jokingly punched him. She didn't back away from him as she stared into his eyes. There was something about his eyes that just pulled her in. "What ab-"

"Shouldn't you be resting?"

Pulling away like she had been burned, Toni pulled away and glared at Rogers, who seemed to love telling her what to do. "Give it a rest," she stated, fighting the pain. "You act like I'm charging into battle." She picked up her glass and took a slip as to mock him.

"You're injured," Rogers stared as he stepped toward her. "You shouldn't be up."

"I don't-" Toni started but feeling a hand on her knee, she froze. It shocked her more than anything as she didn't know how she felt about it. Why would Barnes put his hand on her knee? Did that mean anything? Only a few people had ever put their hands on her knee and either they were family members or someone she was about to have sex with. She wasn't going to sleep with Barnes, so what did this mean? In disbelief, she stared at his hand.

"She's fine, Steve," Barnes stated.

Toni shook her head, as she tried to clear her mind. After a few deep breaths, she turned to Rogers, who seem to be glaring at something and it wasn't her. What was he glaring at? It couldn't be Barnes, could it? Was he glaring at the hand of the knee? Was he confused by the hand on the knee as well?

"Recruiting?" Barnes asked, breaking the silence.

Rogers blinked, trying to focus his thoughts, and turned completely to Barnes. "Yes." He paused "What about you? You ready to follow Captain America into the jaws of death?"

"Hell, no! The little guy from Brooklyn who was too dumb not to run away from a fight. I'm following him. But you're keeping the outfit, right?" Barnes stated as his hand left Toni's knee, leaving an empty feeling.

Toni shook her head as she tried to rid herself of those thoughts. "Oh, that outfit," she said, remembering what he wore during the battle of New York. His man really loved to be a flag, didn't he? "Such a sexy outfit." She laughed.

Rogers turned to her and took a deep breath. "You just like to poke fun at everything."

"Yup." She smiled. "But at least, I'm a basket of fun. Aren't you glad I'm coming with you?" She put on the biggest smile ever and she held it for a few seconds, even with the pain.

Rogers narrowed his eyes. "Maybe, it would be best if you stayed put." He clearly did not like the idea of her coming with them, but there was nothing he could do about it.

She took a deep breath as she didn't want to have this fight with him again. "What are you afraid of, Rogers?" she asked. "I can take care of myself."

His eye brow rose. "You call Schmidt capturing and torturing you taking care of yourself?" he asked. He took another step toward her, blocking her view of the bar.

"Okay, that's a bad example, but I blame Barnes on that one," she said, annoyed. Why did he have to step in front of her like that? What was he trying to show?

"Hey, hey. That was so not my fault," Barnes protested. "We were clearly outmatched."

"Yea, but you distracted me!" She stared pointing at him.

"You-" Barnes stated

"Captain," Peggy started interrupting the three.

"Agent Carter," Rogers greeted. His face practically glowing.

Barnes also looked shell shocked. "Ma'am," he stated, standing up to greet her.

Peggy glanced at him only for a second before turning back to the Captain. "Howard has some equipment for you to try. Tomorrow morning?"

"Sounds good," Rogers replied.

Toni glanced between the two and that pukey feeling from earlier returned. Why were they staring at each other like they were going to eat each other? Why in the hell was Peggy wearing that dress? Was she just trying to show off? If she was, it was sure working, because Rogers was looking at her with such an intensely that it annoyed Toni.

A loud cheer drew Peggy's attention. "I see your top squad is prepping for duty."

"You don't like music?" Rogers asked.

"Probably not her taste. I think it's pretty cool," Toni chirped in.

Peggy turned to her. "Shouldn't you be resting?" she asked, glancing Toni over. "You went through quite an ordeal."

What was with everyone telling her that she should be resting? She was perfectly fine; the pain wasn't too bad. "You all worry too much. That so wasn't the first that I'd been tortured," Toni revealed, raising up her glass and taking a slip.

"What do you mean that wasn't your first time that you hadn't been tortured?" Rogers asked taking a step toward her. His hands were balled, and there was a hint of emotion in his voice that Toni couldn't figure out.

As she was focused on Rogers, she didn't notice the hand reappearing on her knee, until she felt the pressure, and it surprised her, causing her to finch noticeably.

"When was this?" Barnes asked. His hand was tightly on her knee again. "Toni."

"Does Phillips knows about this?" Peggy asked. She also had a concerned look in her eyes. "Maybe, you should speak to someone."

They were all talking at the same time, and it was all too much for Toni. She couldn't handle all of their concerned looks and she couldn't think. "Stop worrying!" She yelled, jumping to her feet. "Why don't you two get a room?" She pointed toward Rogers and Peggy. She turned to Barnes. "And why don't you just go find some hot dame to bang?" she stated. She glanced at them all before pushing pass them. "Just leave me alone."

"Sark, that was uncalled for," Peggy snapped.

Toni turned back, looking at them, and she knew all of them were annoyed with her but she couldn't find the urge to care. "Just go dancing or something," she stated as she turned to leave.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Toni felt like an idiot for what happened in the bar, but she wasn't going to apologize. It wasn't her style, and it was the truth. She just wanted them to leave her alone. Why was that so hard? Why were they pushing so hard? Why couldn't they leave her alone? She wasn't speaking in French or anything. She just didn't want to talk about her feelings.

Taking a deep breath, she took a step down the stairs leading into Howard Stark's lab. She planned to check on her device, once she figured out how to get one of those cores away from her father. He probably wouldn't let her near the cores, but she would convince him.

"Initial signature is unusual. Alpha beta remain neutral," Howard stated, talking to no one in general. There, however, were a few techs next to her father, taking notes and watching. He stood in front of a glass window, experimenting with one of the cores. "I doubt Rogers picked up on that. He-"

"Better be careful, Stark. It might bite," she stated, noticing him reach a metal arm toward the core. Before continuing down the steps, she took a deep breath, and it wasn't until she was at the bottom of the stairs that she spoke again. "You might hurt yourself." She stood a good few feet back. There was no doubt that thing would bite if it was made from the Tesseract.

Howard glanced back with a cheesy smile. He let go of the controls and tapped on the glass. "We're safe behind this," he replied as he tapped again. "Why don't you come closer? I would like a second opinion."

Toni smiled and chuckled. "Well, when you get blasted on your ass, I'll be right where I'm needed to laugh at you."

"Who says I'm going to be blasted on my ass?" he asked as he rotated back to the glass. "Just hopeful thinking? You want to see me on my ass."

She did a chuckling sigh. "I would love to see you fall on your ass." She took great joy whenever he failed or fell on his face. It meant he wasn't perfect.

He turned back to her. "You're never going to like me, are you?" he asked.

"Nope."

"We will see," he replied,

"We will," she said, annoyed that they were talking about this. Why did he keep trying to get her to like him?

He turned back. After a few seconds of silence, he spoke again, "Seems harmless enough. Hard to see what all the fuss is about." He poked at the core again, but this time, it poked back. The core sent out a pulse that shattered everything in its path. The glass could not withstand the wave and it splintered, sending glass everywhere. The pulse also threw the techs and Howard several feet.

Toni, in shock, brought her arm up to protect her face as a few fragment of glass flew at her, slicing her. It wasn't anything substantial, but the cuts bleed. The wave knocked her back a step, as she wasn't expecting it to be so strong, but it didn't knock her down like it did Howard, who landed a few feet from her. Slowly bringing down her arm, she turned to her father, who had a smile on his face.

"Write that down," he stated with a laugh.

"Are you okay?" She asked, annoyed. Her arms strung from the cuts, but they wasn't as painful as the bruise on her face.

He glanced at her as he pushed himself to his feet. He was scrapped up, and it was clear that he hurt his back when he landed. "It seems you were right. I did land on my ass." He let out another laugh. "And it seems like you do care about me!" He was beaming.

Toni's eyes twitched as he smiled. His smile made her want to hit him and she might, as she spotted a familiar wrench on the table. "You're pushing it, Stark," she said. She eyed him with a deadly glare. "I don't want to end up back in a prison cell, so shut it."

Howard dusted himself off. "Don't deny it. I'm growing on you."

She picked up the wrench and pointed it at him. "Don't make me kill you," she stated, knowing that she could never really kill him with him being her father and all.

He laughed again. "But that would put you back in a cell."

"I have ways to kill you without anyone knowing. I just don't want to waste them." Toni waved the wrench at him.

"Witnesses!" He yelled as he limped to the containment room. The core was still glowing as brightly as it had been before he messed it. "We have witnesses."

He was playing with her and that pissed her off. She had no interest in playing this game with him. "You," she stated waving the wrench again.

"Yes, me," he stated with a smile.

Her eye twitched, but she couldn't throw the wrench at him. Phillips wouldn't like that, and she couldn't make him mad again. She had already gotten him angry. "Where's my device?" she asked, changing the subject. The wretch was still dangling from her hand.

"It's over there," he stated, pointing toward the other side of the room. "Has something changed? I thought you couldn't power it."

"I want to test that core," she stated, nodding to it.

He looked at her with a serious look. "No." She glared. "Don't give me that look. You aren't testing it." His voice had a parenting tone to it, and she didn't like it. "It's too dangerous."

"Dangerous?" she snapped. He so did not have the right to tell her no. She would do what she wanted. "Just because you don't know how to handle it, doesn't mean I can't."

Howard took a deep breath. "That isn't it." He paused. "You're already hurt, and adding that core to your device won't be as simple as you think."

"I know that!" She snapped. "I'm not a child." Here it was again. He was treating her as he did in the future with the kid gloves. He didn't believe in her, and she tried to ignore the fact that it hurt.

"I never said that," he said.

Toni closed to him. "Then let me try."

"Why don't you let me do it?"

Something in her mind just snapped. "I know what this is! You don't think I can do it. You think you're the only genius there is." She tried to calm down. She tried to catch her breath, as she couldn't allow herself to explode. If she did, she might say something that she might regret later. "Get off your high horse."

At this point, the techs had left. "The only one person on a high horse is you," he stated as he stepped toward her.

"Excuse me?" She was _not_ on a high horse.

"You're the one who thinks she's god gift to humanity."

That hit her, because there was a time where she had thought that; however, that was before the Iron Man Suit. That was before she met the Avengers. That was before everything. Was he saying that she had been lying to herself? Had she not really changed? "You're the one who goes around, rubbing it into people's faces that you're a Stark," she stated, trying to come up with something. Really all her statement did was insult her.

"I'm not a shamed of who I am unlike you."

That hit home, more than she would have liked, though she shouldn't have been surprised. He always knew how to hurt her with his words. "Shut it," she demanded, as she pushed him into a table.

"Grow up," he stated as he caught himself. However, everything on the table went flying.

"Why-" She couldn't finish her sentence as there was water, dripping off the table. There had been a glass of a water on the table, and it had tipped over when she shoved Howard into it.

"Toni?" Howard asked, his anger disappearing. He had noticed her eyes widen at the sight of the water.

Toni couldn't see anything besides the dripping water that was haunting her, mocking her. It sent her back to the time in the torture room. It brought her back to that fear and pain. It brought that feeling of dread, and she couldn't shake it.

"Toni!" She heard him yell her name, but the water held her.

The air left her lung, and chills went up her spine. She tried to take short breaths to catch her breath, but nothing she did worked. She felt a panic attack coming on and there was nothing she could do to stop it.

"Toni," he called again, and this time, he grabbed a hold of her shoulders and shook. "You aren't there. You're here with me in the lab. You're safe," He said it slowly.

None of that made sense. She wasn't safe; she wasn't safe anywhere. That dripping sound just wouldn't go away, and it kept her mind locked in that pain.

"Toni," he yelled. He shook her a little harder. "He doesn't have you. He won't hurt you again, Toni."

He had that parent voice again, but this time, he sounded like a protective parent that wouldn't let anything happen to her, and she believed him. Shaking her head, she focused on him and she was able to relax enough that she could breathe.

"There you go."

Her brain snapped again, when she realized what was going on and whose arms she was in. She couldn't let him be the one to comfort her, and also, she did not need anyone to comfort her. She was not a child. "Let go," she stated as she pushed him away.

"Toni."

She looked at him for a second before she bolted out of the room.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni didn't know what or how to deal with what was going on in her head. Shaking her head, she glanced up from her spot at a lab table to her father, who was doing something with something. She hadn't spoken to him since that day in the lab, but she knew he was watching her like she was about to break. It annoyed her, but she didn't want to say anything as she wanted to avoid what had happened in the lab from repeating.

Her device was a few feet from her, but she still hadn't had the chance to test it with the hydra core as Howard wouldn't let her near it. He had been careful and had made it impossible for her to steal it, like he knew what her plan was. She didn't like that he was able to read her like he had.

She picked up her head, hearing something. Deciding it was none of her concern, she turned back to her stupid device, which just teased her. It made her life a living hell. It was like it had a mind of its own, and its life goal was to make her go crazy. "Stupid-"

There were the voices again, but this time, they were louder. _Rogers? Sassy Pants?_ She thought to herself. Why was they fighting? No, she didn't feel joyous at this.

"Peggy, that's not what you thought it was." Rogers stated as Peggy and he burst into the room.

 _Of course._ She thought, listening to them fighting about their 'relationship.' When did they get into a relationship? She kind of felt bad for Peggy, because that was one relationship that wouldn't last.

"I don't think anything, Captain. Not one thing. You always wanted to be soldier and now you are. Just like all the rest," Peggy said as they walked pass her.

"Well, what about you and Stark? How do I know you two haven't been...fonduing?"

Toni almost choked twice on that one sentence. One: did he just say fonduing? Two, did he just infer that Peggy and her father had this thing? The first one was funny, but the second wasn't. She didn't like that idea at all. Was her mother right? Did her father cheat? She wouldn't put it pass him.

"You still don't know a bloody thing about women!" Peggy stated as she stormed away. Rogers just let her do so.

Toni laughed at that, drawing the Captain's attention. That was one thing that never changed about him; he never knew how to talk to a woman.

"You find that funny, Sark?" Rogers asked.

 _Ouch,_ Toni thought. She got the last name. "I find a lot of things funny," she stated as she pushed her device away and stood up.

"Just stay out of it."

She so did not like his tone. She didn't understand why he was acting like this; it wasn't just because he was Captain Ass. It was like he was really mad at her, which annoyed her. He needed to get over 'this' thing. "Fine," she stated as he walked away. She followed him of course.

Howard was waiting for Rogers by the shields. "I got a few things for you," he stated as he patted the table. He smiled and stated, "And by the way, fondue is just cheese and bread, my friend."

"Really? I didn't think…" Rogers stated.

Toni's eye brow raised. "I think you're special."

The Cap turned back to her and narrowed his eyes. "I-"

Howard jumped in. "The moment you think you know what's goin' on in a woman's head, it's the moment your goose is well and truly cooked. Me, I concentrate on work. Which at the moment is about making sure you and your men do not get killed."

Toni snorted as he kept trying to get her to talk to him, so she didn't know how focus he was. "You focus? Yea, right."

"Shouldn't you be resting?" Rogers asked as he turned back to her. His eyes flashed to her bruise which had turned into a darker shade of purple and blue, a sign it was healing.

"Why don't you go rest?" She replied. "Maybe, your dream self is better at talking to the ladies."

Rogers turned to her. "Maybe, your dream self has matters."

"Maybe, your dream self isn't an asshole."

"I'm not an asshole."

"If the shoes fit, wear it, Captain Asshole," Toni stated.

"You-" The Super Soldier started.

"Enough," Howard interrupted with an annoyed look on his face. "Let's get back to the task at hand." He took a deep breath. "Carbon polymer. Should withstand your average German bayonet. Although, Hydra's not going to attack you with a pocket knife."

"They would be stupid if they did, though I wouldn't put it pass Hydra solders," she muttered as she looked away with her arms folded across her chest. Why was she here? Maybe, she should work on her damn device, though it would be useless without a Hydra core, which her father won't let her near it.

Howard picked up the damaged shield that Rogers had been using. "I hear you're uh...kinda attached?"

"It's handier than you might think," The Captain responded. He glanced toward Toni, who was blowing her hair out of her face.

"I took the liberty of coming up with some options," Howard stated, eyeing him. He motioned to the table behind him, which had a few shields on it. Each was more different than the last.

Toni turned back, looking at the shields. Though she wasn't a fan of the shield, she knew it had its pros; however, she knew Rogers wouldn't pick any of those ugly shields. They were all too fancy for him.

"This one's fun. She's been fitted with electrical relays. It'll allow you to…" Howard started.

"Why must it be a she?" Toni protested. "Why can't you use a different pronoun? Why are you being sexist to shields? What did they ever do to you?"

"Because-"

Howard wasn't able to finish as Rogers cut him off. "What about this one?" He asked as he noticed a shield under the table. It was a perfectly round shield, which was simple compared to the rest of them.

"No! No! That's just a prototype." Howard crossed to him in a hurry as if to take it from him.

"What's it made of?" Rogers asked as he stepped away from Howard.

"Vibranium. It's stronger than steel and a third of the weight. It's completely vibration absorbent."

"How come it's not a standard issue?" He moved the shield in different angles, testing it.

Howard watched for a second before answering. "That's the rarest metal on earth. What you're holding there is all we've got."

Toni snorted. "And the U.S. is too cheap for that." Both Howard and Rogers both turned and glared. "What?" She stated, trying to play innocent. She put on a big smile.

"Stop playing innocent, Sark," Peggy stated as she returned. "It doesn't suit you."

"Everything suits me," she stated with a wink. "You want to test?" She teased.

Peggy looked at her for a second before turning to Howard. "You quite finished, Mr. Stark? I'm sure the Captain has some unfinished business?"

"So no fun," Toni responded when she was ignored. She hated to be ignored.

"What do you think?" the Captain asked, not responding to Toni who was now sporting a playful frown.

What Peggy did next completely surprised everyone including Toni who never expected that behavior from Peggy. She picked up a gun and shot at Rogers, who quickly held up the shield to protect himself. The bullets dinged as they hit the floor. "What the holy shit fuck, Sassy?" Toni stated in shock. Did Peggy just shot at her boy toy?

Peggy glanced at her. "Yes. I think it works," was her only response as she walked away.

"And people thought I'm crazy," Toni said when Sassy was out of ear shot.

"You are crazy," Howard countered as he turned to Rogers who stood there in shook.

"At least, I never shot at someone," she stated. "Well on my own team," she added. Howard glanced at her before turning to the motionless Captain.

It wasn't until a few seconds later that Rogers spoke. "I had some ideas about the uniform," he stated slowly, handing something to Howard.

"Stealing the USA Flag doesn't count," Toni stated as she stared at the paper.

Rogers turned to her. "Sometimes the world needs a symbol," he stated. "I guess you wouldn't understand." He glared at her for a few seconds before turning away.

Toni watched him as he walked away. Sure, she knew she was being an asshole, but it wasn't all her. She couldn't stand this fighting between them. She missed hanging out with him. She missed being able to talk to him or even trying to hook him up with someone. She could be having so much fun trying to get Peggy and him together, even if he didn't like it. That would make it funnier.

"Go after him."

She jumped at Howard's voice as she forgot for a second that he was there. "Why would I go after him?" she asked.

"You don't have to go after him," he stated as he picked up the round shield.

She turned to Howard and glared. He was not allowed to give her advice on anything, and she definitely did not want to talk about her non-relationship with the giant Shrimp. It wasn't any of his business, even if Howard was right. They needed to hash out whatever was going on between them, because if they didn't it, they would have the exact same relationship that they had in the future, and she didn't have the energy for that. "I know."

"Then do it."

"You don't know everything!" she yelled as she took the wrench out of her pocket and threw it at him.

Howard raised the shield to block it. The wrenched dinged loudly as it made contact and fell to the ground. "What is with you and throwing things at me?" he asked.

Toni glanced at him and smirked as she darted away to find Rogers.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

It took Toni a few minutes to catch up, as even Rogers' slow walk was a speed walk. Also, as her body was still sore, she had a difficult time running or jogging. She kept tripping over her own feet. She was only to catch him because some officer had stopped to speak with him. "Rogers," she called when she got within a few feet from him.

Still speaking with the officer, he only glanced at her for a second. The officer nodded and stepped away a few seconds later. Rogers glanced at Toni again before he stepped away as well. "God, damn it, Steve," she yelled, switching to his first name. "Stop."

Hearing his first name, he froze and glanced back. "Toni," he muttered. He didn't move; he just watched her run to him. He stepped forward as he noticed her stumble.

"I want to talk," she stated, ignoring the looks from the other officers in the hallway. She felt herself falter again, but this time, she was unable to stop herself and she fell forward. She put her arms out, ready to brace herself, but she found herself in a pair of arms. Toni glanced up at her savior and smiled as innocently as she could. "My hero."

Rogers helped her to her feet. "What do you want to talk about, Sark?" he asked as he stepped back.

"Not Sark," she responded. She hated that goddamn name and if someone called her that name one more time, she was going to snap.

"Okay, Toni," he stated. His voice sounded strain.

She smiled at the sound of her name on his lips. "In here," she demanded as she looked around. People were looking at them. As she didn't want to have this conversion in public, she pushed open a door a few feet from her. She glanced around the room quickly to make sure it was free, and to her luck, it was empty. "Get in," she ordered as she pulled Rogers in. She didn't expect to pull him as easy as she did, since he could've easily fought her off.

"What do you want to talk about?" he asked again as he stepped through the doorway.

"Hold on," she said as she stepped to the door and closed it. She caught a few people eyeing her, though she should have expected that. It probably didn't look too innocent.

He turned to her. "Okay. So what?"

Toni took a deep breath as to gather her strength; however, his dress uniform wasn't helping. He looked so much better in this than he did in the USA flag. Don't get Toni wrong. She was patriotic, but she would not go running around wearing a flag. "Why are you so mad at me?" she asked.

He glanced at her before eyeing the door. "If you don't know, then there's no point," he stated as he stepped toward the door.

Seeing where he was heading, she jumped in front of him. "Not the whole, 'if you don't know, then there's no point' argument. We need to get this out." She stated. "Now spill."

Rogers looked at her before turning away and staring at the wall. He stayed like that for a few minutes before he turned back. "Where did you go that night of the expo?" he asked, stepping to her. "You disappeared with no good bye."

She could tell how pissed he was, but his anger just set off her anger. "You act like I owed you anything. A thank you maybe, but nothing else."

"Okay, then." He paused. "I guess there's nothing to speak about," he said, stepping closer to her. "Just move out of the away." He reached for the doorknob, but Toni put her weight completely against the door as if to stop him.

"That isn't what I mean," she interjected quickly. Her small frame wouldn't stop him as he could pick her up and move her with ease.

"Then what?" He gazed over her face, stopping at the bruise. It was such an eye catching injury. "I don't have time to play games. Why did you leave?"

Toni ran her hand through her messy hair, which she had to urge to rip out. "I was arrested and put in a cell for god knows how long," she explained as she looked up at him. "I would've said goodbye if I could've." She paused. "I'm sorry about that." She paused. "You should feel honored as I don't say sorry ever."

He stated at her for a few seconds unable to answer. "Why?" he asked.

She took a deep breath. "It's a long story, but that's why I'm here with Stark," she answered. It felt so weird way to refer to her father by Stark.

"I don't understand."

"I'm here, because that's the only way Salty would let me go," she explained. She couldn't tell him the full truth, but she hoped that would work. "I disliked that I left you like that. I'm truly sorry." She gave him the biggest puppy dog eyes that she could muster.

"Salty?" he asked.

"My nickname for the Colonel," she stated.

"Phillips left you in a cell? For what?" he asked annoyed. However, he wasn't annoyed at her which she could tell. It was redirected at the Colonel. "No phone calls or letters?"

"No," she answered. Seeing his face, Toni added, "I did try to break into Stark Industries." She hadn't moved from the door.

"Why?" he stated

She waved it off. "Not important."

"Toni."

"Steve," she responded with a smile. "It's fine."

"Okay, but-"

Her eye twitched. "Enough Steve." She narrowed her eyes at him as he gazed her over again.

"Okay," he stated with a smile.

"So we're good now?" she asked.

"Yes."

"Yay," she cheered as she gave him a jumping hug. She wrapped her arms round him and buried her face in his uniform. She didn't care about her no hugging rule, and she didn't care that she was hugging the Captain, who was an asshole by definition. She was hugging her Shrimp, and who cared about the rules, when he wrapped his arms around her? "Bigger than I remember, Steve." She laughed.

"That's what everyone's telling me," he responded with a chuckle.

Her eye twitched. "…So you're hurting me now." She wiggled in his arms.

"Sorry. Sometimes I don't know my own strength," he stated, letting go of her as if she was burning him. "Maybe, you should rest." He was looking at her as if she was going to break.

"Okay, we can stop that," she stated. "I may be a woman, but I'm not going break." She narrowed her eyes. "I will pound you if you don't stop." She waved her fist at him. "Trust me. I will!"

He sighed. "Just as I remember. I will try, though that bruise on your face makes it difficult."

"Well, then don't look at it, and good." She stated at him for a few seconds before she turned to the door. "Now, let's go. I don't want anyone to think we're fonduing," she joked.

"…What?" he asked. His face was a bright red. "T-they wouldn't think that. Why w-would they think that?"

Toni laughed at him. "Hey, are you insulting me now?" She asked. She loved how red he got. "Am I not good enough for you? Do you not find me attractive? Can I beat you?" She shook her fist at him.

"No, Toni! That isn't it. You're b-"

She chuckled again. "I was playing," she stated with her tongue out. "Besides, I know you only have eyes for Agent Sassy Pants." She elbowed him. She still had no idea why they liked each other, which annoyed her, but she would help him get some. He needed some. Maybe, that would help him relax; plus, she loved how red he got.

"There's nothing going on between us," he stated all too quickly.

Toni couldn't help but let out another laugh. "You're too cute for your own good, Cap. C'mon," she stated as she opened the door. "We can discuss a nickname for Barnes. He's jealous that I hadn't given him one, but I can't think of one. I know you call him Bucky, which is a story that I want to hear, but I want a new one. I just can't think of one."

"Do I have a nickname?" he asked as he followed her out of the room.

"Um," she muttered, trying to sound innocent. She doubted he would like either nickname; Shrimp really wasn't anything to be proud of. And Captain Asshole wasn't exactly nice. "You don't need to know." She put on a smile and skipped away.

"I want to know," he said as he chased after her. She remained a few feet in front of him, and it wasn't because she was faster than he. He could catch her at any second, but the chase was fun. "You have to tell me."

"No, I don't," She teased.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was trying a think of a nickname for Barnes for Toni to give him, but I can't really think of one. The nicknames for Phillips, Peggy, Rogers, or Schmidt aren't all that special, but I can't think of one for him. Any of ideas?


	19. The Rule Book and the Pigs

Things felt better now that Toni had settle things with Steve, though things were still weird with Peggy. She wasn't her mean self at the moment; sure, she still told her what to do, but she was kind of nice about it and that stuck Toni as odd. She wasn't sure if this was a trick or whether Peggy was turning a page. Was she calling a cease fire? She hoped so, because she did not have energy to fight anymore. She had other thing to do like stealing a core from her annoying father. However, that was turning out to be a bigger challenge than she expected. She should've expected that since her father could always outsmart her.

Shaking her head, she made her way back to her tent. They were on the move again with the SSR targeting Schmidt's hydra bases. Right now, Steve was out with the Howling Commandos taking down base number two, and it was the second time that she found herself going crazy. She wasn't sure why she was worried or why she was so invested. This was the past and what was going to happen would happen. There was no changing that. People were going to die and there was nothing that she could do to change it. It was useless to worry.

Toni exhaled slowly as she made her way through a thin crowd of soldiers. It was rather quiet, and she didn't know what to make of the silence. Her mind wasn't helping. Each time Barnes went out, she expected him die. _Damn it,_ she cursed in her head. Why did she get so attached? Why did she break that rule out of all rules? If she hadn't, she wouldn't have gotten attached to Barnes or Steve? _URGH!_ She would've been her worry free self, and she would be able to get on her with her damn life.

She liked her rules, because they made things less sticky. Life wasn't complicated when she followed her damn rules, and her damn emotions wouldn't be affecting her so much. She wouldn't be a laughing stock. _You're a fool,_ she told herself. Maybe, she should've taken Loki's offer, even if it was the most obvious trap in the universe. She wouldn't be suck in this mess, though she would probably be in a bigger mess.

She took another deep breath, thinking. However, it wasn't even a second later that someone was yelling after her.

"Fire Rocket!"

Her eye twitched at the nickname. God, she hated that nickname. How the hell was she a fire rocket? Why add the word fire? Yes, an explosion of sorts was needed, but if a rocket was on fire, that was a very bad thing. Maybe, that was what he was trying to say about her. Shaking her head, she kept walking as she really had no interest in talking to him; however, he didn't get the picture.

"Fire Rocket," he called again as he jumped in front of her. His face was all bruised and there was a clear limp in his step, which was probably why he was still in camp and not out in the field.

She really really hated that name, more so than Sark. _You know how Salty feels now,_ she told herself. "What?" she asked, her eye still twitching. She was clearly annoyed.

"You seem to be in better a mood than before," he stated with a smile.

Did he really consider this a better mood? He must be crazy, though she had to admit that she less snappy than before. "Don't make me beat you," she threatened. It was a buff really; as the last two times she dealt with him, she was saved by Barnes who wasn't in camp at the moment. That also annoyed her as she was _not_ a damsel in distress.

"I wanted to see how you're doing," he stated with a smile. It came out as a cheesy pickup line.

"Still not getting into my pants, Private," Toni stated, as she folded her arms across her chest. She gave him the famous you-are-an-idiot glance, which Future Rogers hated. "You got to at least buy me dinner first, but I ain't a cheap date."

He laughed, taking a step toward her. "There's a bet to who can get you into bed first," he stated.

Her eye started to twitch again, as she took a step back, trying to put some distance between them. "Just me? I can't be the only one you men want," she stated.

"Sure, they're lot of pretty dames," he stated. "But none are as special as you." He took another step toward her. "A bet just for you." His smile turned creepy if it wasn't already, and it sent chills down her back. "You know you want it."

"Excuse me?" Toni asked, getting pissed. Why was she the only woman they betted on? There were plenty of women these men could go after. Why the hell did he think she wanted it? She didn't want it… Okay, she did like it and there was times that she wanted. Heck, she hadn't had sex in a while, but that did not mean she would sleep or even consider sleeping with any of these men.

"Cursing like a man. Walking like a man." He paused as he glanced her over from head to toe. "Wearing pants like a man. You must want it like we men do." He took another step toward her.

Her anger was about to burst and this man was going to get beat by a woman. He better enjoy that.

"Let me-" He started as he leaned in as if to kiss her.

Before he could finish his sentence, Toni snapped and slugged him in the face. Not expecting that, the private fell back. "Do I punch like a man too?" she retorted, as she tried not to wink in pain. His face was boney and it hurt. "Is that why you want me? Because you're really a woman and someone needs to wear the pants."

"Why you, bitch," he cursed as he got to his feet. "I'll teach you to-"

"You'll teach her what, Private?"

Toni jumped at the voice, surprised at the interruption. "Peggy," she uttered.

Peggy, in her skirt and heels, stepped toward Toni and the private; she stood almost in between them. "What were you going to teach her?" She asked. Her tone was very demanding. "I'm waiting, Private."

The Private glanced at Peggy before focusing on Toni and giving her a look. "Something private, Agent. It's none of your concern," he stated through his teeth.

"You better watch your tone," Peggy demanded.

Toni tried her best to keep in her snort. Peggy had on her angry babysitting voice, and though she disliked it as a child, it was funny now. It was nice to hear her yell at someone else for a chance.

Private glared at Peggy for a few seconds before turning away. As he walked away, Peggy added, "You should put something on that eye." Toni let out a chuckle. "Are you okay, Sark?" she asked once the man was gone.

"I'm great." She put on the biggest smile that she could muster, but Peggy was still giving her a look. "I might've broken my hand on his fugly face, but I'm good. I swear." She flexed her hand to see how bad it was. The skin on her hand was cracked and it was bleeding slightly, but she was able to flex it. "Now, it matches my face," she stated as she brought it to her discolored face which was returning to its normal color.

"This isn't something to joke about," Peggy retorted as she grabbed Toni's uninjured hand and pulled her along toward their tent. "He could've done something to you."

Toni's eye twitched tired of being lectured, but she guessed that Sassy Pants was right. That man was going to hurt her. "You can let me go," she stated as she yanked her arm away. "I can walk myself."

Peggy took a deep breath. "I'm sorry," she stated. "Sometimes my minds wander."

That stuck Toni as odd. She didn't expect that from Peggy, but she didn't say anything. She just followed her back to their tent. It wasn't until they arrived that Toni spoke, "So was there a reason why you walked me back?" Not waiting for a response, she crossed to her messy cot and sat down.

"I just wanted to make sure no one else would bother you," Peggy answered as she crossed to her cot. She sat as well, but she kept her glance away from Toni.

Toni had felt that something was off with Sassy, but now, she knew something was off. Carter wasn't like this. She didn't talk like this to Toni. "I would've punched them all in the face." She flexed her arm.

She glanced toward Toni again before looking away quickly. "You were almost assaulted. It's no laughing matter, Sark."

"It depends on how you look at it. The way I look at things everything is."

"Unfortunately."

Toni let that slide as there was something going on in Peggy's head and she wanted to know what it was. "So Agent, what's going on in that head?" She asked, using a direct attack. She glanced at Carter one last time before she laid down. She twitched when she realized where she put her journal; it was digging into her back, but she did not move to get it. She wasn't sure if Peggy knew about it, but she did not want to draw attention to the fact that she kept one.

"What makes you think that?" Peggy asked.

"We don't have a good enough relationship for you to walk me back to the tent and stay," Toni answered as she closed her eyes. Her body was heavy on her; she hadn't gotten much sleep since she was rescued. Her nightmares had been worse than ever, and she didn't know how to handle them. Usually, she had sleeping pills or alcohol, but she had no access to them now.

Toni heard Peggy shift on her cot and judging from the sound, Peggy had laid down. "Can't we girls look out for each other?"

Fighting to stay awake, Toni let out a howling laugh. Peggy's tone was cute as if she was a shy child asking for ice cream or something. "We girls can do a lot of thing." She let out another laugh. "Just tell me what you want to talk about?"

"AreyoudatingSteve?" she asked quickly.

She popped up, shocked that Sassy even asked. "Did you just ask if Steve and I are dating?" she asked, coughing. That got her heart beat up.

"It isn't my concern," she stated hastily as she waved it off. Peggy rolled away to hide her face.

Okay, that was cute. Peggy was jealous! "You're jealous!"

"Just forget it," Peggy snapped and sat up.

"Easy. Steve and I are friends," Toni responded as she put her hands up in defense. Her mind flashed to a few of the future Rogers and her conversions; there were times that she thought he was going to snap on her. To get him that angry wasn't easy, but yet, it was normal for her. "Trust me, Steve and I are not compatible at all. We would so kill each other." She let out a chuckle. "His head would explode. He would not be able to handle all of this." She popped out her chest and motioned to her body.

Peggy left out a chuckling sigh. "I know I do."

"Hey!" Toni smiled as she saw Peggy smile again. "So you want Steve."

Her face turned bright red. "N-No…You know… Urgh." She paused for a few seconds. "…Yes, I like Steve."

There was no real reason for Toni to ask as she already knew Sassy's feelings for Steve, and she knew Steve was love sick for Peggy. Their puppy love made her pukey, but it was kind of cute. Steve was adorable when he was in love. "I can play Cupid!" She jumped to her feet.

Peggy's face was priceless at those words. "I don't need you to play cupid."

"How will you and Steve get together if you don't have my help?" She questioned as she made her eyes as big as she could. "You can't fight my puppy dog eyes." She put on her best I-am-innocent look.

Peggy let out a laugh. "Well, I guess it couldn't hurt." She smiled. "But only on one condition."

"Yea, what's that?" Toni asked, eye brow raised. Peggy was up to something and it couldn't be good. She folded her arms across her chest and eyed Peggy. Maybe, her glare could get it out of her.

She put on a smile as she sat up. "I get to play cupid for you."

Toni stared for a few seconds, trying to read her face. "Besides the fact that we're so playing into the woman stereotype, I don't need a cupid. Why would I need a cupid?" In reality, her playing cupid may not be the best idea when they were in a war time; however, there wasn't anything else she could do besides fixing her device. She couldn't offer help without altering the future.

Peggy let out a chuckle. "We so just did that. Interesting."

Toni glanced over to her. "Yea, we did." It was weird to hear her laugh.

"But you can't say that you aren't attracted to Sergeant Barnes. I've seen the way you look at him."

Her eye twitched again. She did _not_ look at him. "If I wanted Barnes, I could have him without anyone playing cupid," she stated, sitting down.

"You are touchy." She put on a smile. "Maybe, I'm right."

"And you think I'm a hand full," she stated as she laid down. "I don't need a cupid, but if you want to return the favor, you can get me one of those hydra cores."

"Why don't you ask Stark? He would have access to them."

Toni glanced over at Peggy, who was staring at her. "I asked him, but he's worried that I'm too injured or I'll get hurt." She snorted. "I so want to take a wrench to him."

"You really don't like him, do you?"

"What gave it away?" she playfully asked as she mindlessly stared up. "Anyhow, what made you think Steve and I were something?"

Peggy eyed her before copying Toni's pose. "It's something going around the camp." She didn't explain.

"I'm a star! The talk of the camp it seems." Toni puffed. "So everyone thinks that Steve and I are fonduing?" She laughed. "I told Steve everyone would think that. He didn't believe me."

"He doesn't understand a great deal of things."

"Ain't that the truth?" Toni felt herself start to drift again. Trying to stay awake, she shake her head slightly. "And look we're getting along. That's a first."

"You're being bearable for once," she responded.

"For once?" Toni responded, fighting to keep her eyes open. "I'm always bearable." Peggy snorted. "HEY, I am!" Sassy said something else, but the engineer couldn't make it out. Sleep had overcame her and she became dead to the world.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

_Waves crashed violently against the shore, demolishing everything in its path. The wind was violently whipping across the shore, throwing everything that it could pick up. Lightening lit up the area as it stretched across the sky. A loud roar of thunder deafen the shore as it shook the ground. Rain nailed the shore as it came down heavy, soaking everything within seconds and this included Toni, who was tied down near the shore line. She was being pelted by water and with each strike, she felt herself unable to breathe. Her heart was racing all too fast, and she was afraid that she would have a heart attack._

_Even with her arms chained behind her, she tried to protect herself from the blasting wind and sand by getting as low as she could. However, she was struck by the powerful ocean waves, which forced its way into her mouth and down her throat. She coughed as the salt water burned her throat and lungs. She pushed herself up, trying to get some air, but the wind caught her and slapped her around. She shook herself as she tried to gain control over the fear that was growing inside of her. The ocean waves were getting stronger and the water level was growing. If it kept up this pace, she would be under water in minutes. To make matters worse, the storm was moving closer to her and the ground shock hard with each passing second. Lightening stuck only a few feet from her._

_"Breath, Stark," she told herself as the water level rose a few inches. As she was on her knees, the water was on above her legs. "You will be fine!" she tried to tell herself, but she couldn't believe that. She couldn't believe anything at that moment as the water just kept raising and there was no escape. Her arms were tied low that there was no way she could stand._

_"Y-you will be fine." She told herself as she struggled with her restrains, trying to break them. However, no matter what she did, her restrains would not break. There was no give. "You can do it," she told herself as she tried to not freak out. "Y-You need to relax," she repeated, but her heart was going way too fast._

_"Toni!"_

_She couldn't breathe. She tried to take a breath, but her lungs weren't working. The water was raising and the waves were pelting her hard, knocking her down. She was going to die._

_"Toni!"_

_Her mind snapped as she heard someone call her name. Was someone coming to save her? Then was why he yelling her and not freeing if he was trying to save her? That didn't make any sense. So when she felt someone grab her, she swung at him, without remembering that her hands were tied. To her surprised, her punch landed._

"Toni, you're safe. Wake up!" someone yelled, keeping a hold on her. "Toni!"

Forcing her eyes open, she was startled to see Barnes, who was looking at her with a deep concern. "What the hell?" she yelled as she pushed him off. "What are you doing here?" she asked, trying to play it off. Nightmares weren't anything really as they were something that she could deal with. Besides, another rule of hers was not to show weakness. Having nightmares were a sign of weakness.

"I ran into Agent Carter," he replied, rubbing the part of his face where she hit him. "You have a mean right hook. I don't think that I have ever been hit that hard." He put on a smile.

Toni glared at him. "I can punch you again if you like." She pushed the thin cover off and popped up into a sitting position. "Why are you here?" She asked, staring at the deep red mark on his face. She felt bad for hitting him, but she didn't think she had hit him that hard. "What did Sassy Pants tell you?" Was this her playing cupid? If so, she was going to get her back. She did _not_ need a cupid and she did not want Barnes. If she did, she could get him herself.

He took a seat next to her, ignoring her glare. "Nothing much." He glanced down at her hands, which were curled up in her lap. "Another nightmare. What was this one about?" She didn't answer. "You can tell me. You don't need to hold them it. It doesn't make you weak."

Of course it made her weak. Nightmares were for people who had fears and fears made you weak. Nightmares where for people who didn't know how to control their emotions.

"Toni, you're going to go crazy if you don't talk about it. I know you can't sleep and that you hadn't been able to sleep for a while."

Toni didn't like that he knew that. He shouldn't know that. Barnes turned to her and brushed her hair out of her face. She didn't like that he thought that was acceptable.

"Talk to me."

_No,_ she protested in her mind as she turned from him.

"You're stubborn." She glared at him. "Don't give me that look. You are. What's haunting you?" He reached his hand to her, but she swapped it away.

"Who says something is haunting me?" Toni asked as she hopped to her feet.

Barnes leaned toward her. "You're not as impenetrable as you like to portray. Let it out."

"I'm just fine." She reached for her army issued coat and put it on. Taking a deep breath, she headed toward the tent's entrance. She paused for a second and added, "And I'm sorry for hitting you."

Barnes jumped to his feet and followed Toni out. "You don't ever need to apologize to me."

Toni glanced back toward Barnes, who was a few feet behind. He was giving her his stupid smile as if she needed it, which she didn't. "So I can clock you again?" she asked, still wearing her glare.

He laughed, catching up. "I would rather you not, though you won't be able to land another hit. You got lucky."

"Lucky?" She asked. "I'll show you lucky!" She showed him her fist, knowing full well what he was doing and she cursed him for it. She didn't need him to comfort her. "So what did Peggy tell you?" she asked, after a few seconds. "And don't give me that it was nothing. She told you what happened, didn't she?"

"She did," he stated, still eyeing her from the corner of his eyes. "She knew you needed to talk and you wouldn't talk to her." He placed his hand on her shoulder, stopping her. She didn't fight him, but it was clear that she had no interest in talking. "You've been through a lot. You need to let it out."

She stared at him for a few seconds. "Okay, I get it. I know," she said. "If I want to talk, I'll let you know, but don't count on it."

"You're one hard headed dame, aren't you?" he teased as he let go of her.

She knocked on her head. "Yup," she smiled as she changed direction, heading toward Salty's tent. If her father didn't want to give her the core, then she would make him. Salty would surely agree with her.

Barnes took a deep breath. "You frustrate me sometimes."

Toni turned to him with a huge smile. As they were on the edge of camp and there was no one around, she felt comfortable enough to hardcore flirt. She wanted to prove to Peggy that she could get Barnes whenever she wanted. "Why don't you tell me how much?" She asked seducingly as she tipped toe up and whispered into his ear.

He pulled her in slightly as he shuffled backward closer to the trees. "You just like to flirt," he declared, frustrated. His hot breath was on her neck. "You do this on purpose."

She smiled into his neck. "Just admit you like it," she teased as she placed her hands on his chest.

"You're trying to distract me."

Laughing, she asked, "Is it working?" She pushed off slightly, unable to push away completely as he had wrapped his arms around her.

"Do you need to ask?"

_So now what?_ She asked herself as she had proved herself right, though she wasn't sure why she was doing this. Was it to show Peggy or herself? Then there was another question, did Barnes really care or did he just see her as something to conquer? "I can distract everyone with my wilds," she stated as she mockingly flipped her hair and pushed out of his arms. _Did his eye just twitch?_ She asked herself as she glazed up at his face.

"You're cocky," he stated.

She inched closer to him again all so slowly, almost dance like. "Did you just figure that out?"

"No, the second I saw you."

She let out a chuckling sigh. "And you still wanted to play chase?"

"I have no interest in playing chase, though it seems that you enjoy it." She snorted, but before she could open her mouth, he added, "You're falling into my trap. There's no chase." He took a step toward her.

"You think I'm falling for your trap?" she asked, playing angry. "Maybe, you're falling into my trap!" She stated as she spun her back on him. Her hair slightly slapped her face.

He let out a laugh. "So if both traps lead to the same spot, why do you care whose trap worked?"

Before Toni knew what happened, she felt his presence behind her. She felt his breath on her neck again and it sent chills up her spin. _I'm screwed. See! This is why I have rules!_ She yelled at herself. Why did she start this damn flirting game? _Damn you, Peggy_. She was so going to get her back for this. "You haven't won," she stated as she rotated on a dime and playfully pushed him back.

"I don't lose." He reached for her again. His fingertips dance along her forearm, trying to entice her back.

Toni wouldn't admit that she enjoyed this, because she wasn't supposed to. She shouldn't be enjoying this. "You're-"

"What's going on back here?" Steve asked as he stepped into view. He was eyeing Barnes strangely. It was the same look that he had given Barnes before in the bar.

Barnes' hand dropped to his side. "Steve," he greeted.

Toni, silently thanking Steve, crossed to him and patted him on the shoulder. "I was on my way to see Colonel Salty."

"You know I still don't have a nickname," Barnes whined, eyeing Toni's hand on Steve's shoulder. "I feel left out."

"Well, Steve and I haven't come up with anything yet," she teased. She squeezed his shoulder.

"You asking Steve for a nickname for me?" He asked, narrowing his eyes at Steve.

"She won't even tell me mine," Steve stated as he tried to laugh it off.

Toni smiled evilly as she linked arms with Steve, ignoring the twitch in Barnes' eye. She wasn't doing this to make him jealous, not that she would use Steve for that because he would never be attracted to her. "You wouldn't want to know yours, Cap. C'mon. Walk me to Salty," she ordered as she pulled on his arm. "We can talk about your love life." She almost died of laugher at the sight of both of their faces. "You need some help!"

"Y-you think that's i-important right now?" Steve stuttered, reminding Toni of _her_ Shrimp.

"You think I'll give up playing your wing man?" She cheered. "Not a chance."

"Some things never change," Steve sighed, allowing her to put him away.

Toni glanced at Barnes for a second before turning away. "Nope." He was giving her a look, but she just smiled at him.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Once Barnes was out of sight, Toni pulled her arm from Steve and stretched them in front of her. Her body was still swore, but the pain wasn't anything that she couldn't handle. "What?" she asked as she noticed him eyeing her. "Okay, what?" She didn't like how he could read her.

"Nothing," he stated as he walked closely to her.

She eyed him. Whenever he said nothing, there was something. His nothing rarely meant nothing. "Did Sassy tell you about my nightmares?" she asked. That woman told Barnes, so maybe she told Steve. Maybe, Toni should change Peggy's nickname to loud mouth.

Steve reached out to grab Toni's elbow, but he dropped him hands when he was inches from her. "You're still having nightmares, Toni?" His voice was soft, comforting, and it pulled her in.

"She didn't tell you?" Toni asked shocked. She wasn't expecting that. If she told Barnes, why wouldn't she tell Steve? She was really playing cupid, which Toni told her not to do. _DAMN YOU, SASSY!_ Why was she pushing her toward Barnes to hard? "Just forget it then." She put on a large smile as she picked up her speed.

However, Steve kept up with her easily. "Toni," he called as he stared at her face. Her facial bruise was healing, turning into a brownish color. "You know you can talk to me, right?" He let out a sigh when she didn't respond. "Remember, those nights in the apartment, when we did talked?"

Toni thought back to the many nights in the apartment, back to the time when Steve was a shrimp. She was an idiot, talking to him about things. Opening up to him. Breaking her damn rules, and now look where she was, she was attached. "Yea, but during those times, we weren't at war, Rogers," she stated.

"I know." He looked hurt by her use of his last name. "Did you tell Bucky about your nightmares?" he asked.

She eyed him for a second before taking glancing around. She caught a few eyes on them, which was just another signal that Peggy was right about that rumor. "I don't talk to Barnes about my emotions," she responded with a chuckle.

"Then what did I interrupted?" He kept his eyes straight, avoiding at her.

Toni glanced at him with an eye brow raised. If she didn't know better, she would think he was jealous, but why in the hell would he be jealous? He had a thing for Peggy, didn't he? And if he didn't, she was surely not his type. Shaking her head, she had to be wrong. Maybe, he was just being protective, knowing Barnes. "Nothing. He was just bugging me about a nickname."

"It looked like…" He let himself drifted. "Never mind."

She leaned closer to him. "You're cute sometimes." She smiled.

"..." A very red Steve couldn't find his words. All he could do was look forward and walk.

She let out a laugh. "So for Barnes nickname, I could only think of Bucky."

Steve let out a laugh. "I already call him that. You can't steal my nickname for him."

Toni puffed. "Well, I want to give him that nickname for a different reason. Buck is a name for a male rabbit, and it can't be a true nickname without a y." Arriving outside of Phillips' tent, they stopped a few feet from it.

"Why a rabbit?" he asked, eyeing her.

"Well… you know… Rabbits are..." She drifted off with a red face. It was awkward to mention sex to Steve even if it related to a rabbit. "They… breed like crazy. You k-" Steve broke out into a roaring laugh. "Hey! It makes sense!" She stated, trying to talk over his laugher. "You know how he is with the ladies."

Shaking his head, he shook a deep breath. "I know, but that's hilarious."

She gave him a face. "You should ask him for pointers for Agent Carter"

Steve stopped laughing and stared at her. "There isn't anything going on with Peggy."

"She wouldn't have shot at you for nothing!" She gave him a knowing smile. "C'mon, I can help you!" She held her hands together and gave him the biggest smile ever. "You can't turn this smile down!"

Steve was about to respond when Phillips pushed back the flap on the tent and stepped out. "He might not be able to, but I can, Sark."

"Well that's because you hadn't face it fully, Salty!" She turned to the Colonel and gave him a smile.

"Nope, still not working." She gave him an even bigger smile. "Nope. Now stop that. You're giving me the creeps."

"You're no fun, Salty," she stated with a frown.

"Now, leave Rogers alone. He needs to prepare for the next hydra base, and you need to get your ass in here," He stated as he crossed back to the tent. "And I mean now," he ordered as he entered his tent.

"A minute," Toni begged as she stepped toward Steve. "Just one thing, Cap." She took a deep breath. "If I want to talk, you'll be the first. Don't you forget that," she stated. She didn't like that he was the person she would turn to, but he was and there was no denying that, though she totally would if someone asked.

Steve's face lit up in the cute Steve way. "I-"

"Sark, I don't have all day!" Salty yelled from inside of his tent.

"Well, I got I got to go!" She waved before bolting to into the tent.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

"Salty," she greeted as she took a seat cross from him. She went to kick her feet on his desk, but his glare stopped her. "So you're probably wondering why I requested to speak to you."

"Which is?" he asked as he was looking through some paperwork.

"I need one of those cores!" She stated as she leaned forward. Her elbows were on his desk and she was giving him her puppy dog face.

He narrowed his eyes at her before shaking his head. "You're way too comfortable," he stated. "Where did I go wrong? Maybe, I should lock you up with your father. Maybe, he can get you to behave."

"No!" Toni knew he was joking, but she took some offense to that. "I need a core. Please," she begged, puffing out her bottom lip.

"Ask your father." His eye was twitching.

"I did but he won't give it to me."

Salty glanced at her. "Probably for a good reason. Just look at you. You would blow up the whole camp."

"Hey, I take offense to that!" She paused as she narrowed her eyes. "I'm good with explosives. And if I don't get it, you'll be stuck with charming old me!"

Phillips glared back. "That would be a nightmare." She was glaring at him with such an intensity. "Okay, Okay, relax. You're sensitive."

"I'm not sensitive!" She yelled with her arms folded across her chest. She was _SO_ not sensitive, and she would _SO_ hit the asshole who called her that. Salty was the exception to that rule though, as hitting him would land her in a cell. However, maybe she could glue him to a chair… That might still land her in a cell.

He snorted. "I'll talk to Stark for you."

Toni sat up and leaned forward again. "I would hug you but I might get germs!" She had a smile, knowing that she would be getting that core, because Howard could not say no to the Colonel.

"Yea, I wouldn't want your germs."

"I don't have germs! I pay those doctors too much for that." She winked.

Phillips' eye twitched. She leaned back in her chair and gazed out of the tent. "I swear you revert me back fourthly years when I speak to you."

"That meant I've done my job!" She cheered as she jumped to her feet. "Thanks, Salty!" She turned to leave, but before she could move a step, he called her back.

"How are you?" He looked uncomfortable, asking her. "I see your injures are healing nicely and you got your annoying personally back." He leaned back in his chair and eyed her.

"I'm not annoying. I'm magnificent."

He snorted. "We must have different dictionaries. But in all honest, how are you?"

Toni glanced at him, not buying anything he was selling. Why did it matter how she was feeling? "Do you normally ask your soldiers how they are?" she asked, eyeing him. She learned forward on his desk.

"Only the ones from the future, who aren't really soldiers and had been tortured recently," he responded. "I don't need you freaking out or changing the future by doing something stupid. If I have to play therapist, I will."

Her eye twitched. Out of the many things she needed, a therapist wasn't one, because she didn't freak out. Sure, she had small, very small, extremely small attacks (not panic attacks-she refused to call them that), but she did not need a therapist. That would mean she needed to talk to someone and she didn't. "I'm fine, Salty."

"You seem to be leaning on Sergeant Barnes and Captain Rogers a lot," he stated. "I don't need to tell you why that's a bad idea." His arms were folded across his chest and narrowed his eyes at her.

She returned his look with one of her own. "No, you don't, but you don't need to worry. There's nothing going on with Barnes and Me." Toni would make sure of that. Salty was correct: she didn't need that relationship. "And Rogers and I are just friends. In fact, I'm trying to play match maker with him and Agent Carter."

His eye twitched at that. "I don't need a love sick Super Soldier, and I doubt Carter's happy with that."

"We're getting along better, so there!" she yelled as she stuck her tongue at him.

"I see that, and I'm not sure how I feel about that. I don't need you rubbing off on Carter."

"You would be so lucky!" She said as she crossed to the tent's entrance. "Imagine what she could be like if she did!"

"That would be the death of me." He let out a sigh as Toni exited.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Howard still had not handed over the hydra core, but he told her that he would as soon as got back from wherever he went. He left to do something though he wouldn't tell her what, but he did say he would be back soon. It was annoying, but if Toni waited this long, she could wait a little bit longer.

At the moment, Toni was sitting at a base of a tree on the edge of the camp. In her hands was a stretch book, which she was using to stretch possible ideas for getting back to her time. She had a few ideas, but she had no idea if any of these ideas would work. All she knew was that she would destroy her stupid device as soon as she got home. She was going to take a few tons of c4 to it.

Taking a deep breath, she dropped her pencil in the book and closed it. She stared mindlessly for a few seconds before getting to her feet and turning to camp, which was empty again. Most of the camp was out fighting Hydra, while she was bored out of her mind. Even Sassy and Salty were gone. They weren't in the field like Rogers and the Commandos; instead, they were in a meeting with some big heads. Phillips didn't want to leave Toni alone in the camp, but he also didn't want to bring her with him. He didn't want her to meet them, not that Toni wanted to. She wasn't big on authority, and knowing how herself, she would probably say something stupid or rude or smart ass. However, Phillips didn't want to leave her here alone, hearing what happened with the Private. Toni wasn't sure how he heard, as she didn't tell anyone about it, but she could guess that it was Peggy, which annoyed her. She could handle that ass on her own, and besides, she doubted he would try anything else after the punch to the face.

Toni made her way to the weapons tent, where Salty had stationed her. As she was considered a soldier, she had a task like everyone else, even if she was from the future. It annoyed her though as she had no interesting in working in the weapons tent, but that would probably be the best spot for her, even if Phillips did this to her on purpose. He loved to mess with her, though he would deny it.

It didn't take long to arrive at the tent, and it only took a few seconds for the two soldier stationed there to notice her. At the sight of her, one got up and handled her a clip board for the inventory, which infuriated her as they always expected her to do it, before he left. It was like they couldn't count or something, granted she could calculate the number of rounds faster than they could. "You guys so need to go back to elementary school," she stated as she took a seat in front of the many boxes.

"You could always work with Mr. Stark and invent weapon instead of managing them," the remaining soldier stated as he unpacked the new weapons. "You don't need to lower yourself to _our_ standards." He gave her a look.

Her eye twitched. "I don't make weapons." She never really got along with any of the soldiers she worked alongside with as she couldn't keep her mouth shut, but it was difficult with these idiots. Future Rogers and even past Barnes had told her that her I-don't-care-about-others personality would make people dislike her, but she couldn't bring herself to stop.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

_I so need to sleep,_ Toni thought as she pushed herself up from her seat. She had drifted during her shift and almost passed out, which would've been a bad thing. One: she didn't trust the guy she was working with, and two, she didn't need to have a nightmare in public where everyone could see. She was already the talk of the camp and she didn't need anything else added to the rumor mill, which was worse than the present day tabloids. These damn soldiers sure liked to gossip and Toni could've sworn that they were all teenage girls.

Shaking her head, she looked around, trying to keep herself awake. She wasn't looking for anything, but she caught sight of something moving along the tents. Its movement reminded her of her stalker, but it couldn't be. He couldn't be here in camp in the middle of nowhere. How could he be? How could he have found her? What did he want? She shook her head as she tried to clear her mind. He couldn't be here. She had to be going crazy. It had to be the lack of sleep... Unless, Salty was lying about this stalker not being one of his and he had him watching her while he was gone. But that didn't make any sense. But maybe, it did. _See, this is what happens when you don't get sleep,_ she thought.

Toni closed her eyes and forced herself to look away. She was seeing things; there was no one watching her. There couldn't be. Taking a deep breath, she put the clipboard down and nodded to her replacement, who had arrived. Not a second later, she took off. She didn't want to be there anymore and she wanted to get out of sight. Even if her stalker wasn't here, she couldn't help but feel eyes on her, and it sent chills up her spine. She felt like a coward, who couldn't do anything and that irritated.

She continually scanned the area looking for the eyes she felt, but she only saw flashes of movements and it made her heart race. Closing her eyes, she tried to clear her head, and after a few deep breaths, she continued on her way. "You're being-" she started to tell herself, but before she could finish, she bumped into something and fell back on her ass. Before she could speak, she was helped to her feet.

"I'm sorry, Miss. I wasn't watching where I was going? Are you okay?"

Her eye twitched at the word miss. She wasn't sure why she was peeved at being called a miss, but it angered her. "I'm fine," she stated as she wiped herself off. She looked up at the large man with a huge mustache. He was a good few feet taller than she.

"Such a grumpy lady," another man stated. "Didn't get enough sleep, did you?"

Toni turned to him, realizing that she met him before, but what was his name? She knew it started with a g. "How'd you guess?" she asked, as she looked away, still scanning the area. "Yea, I so can't sleep." She puffed. When he laughed, his name came back to her. "Gabe, right?" she asked.

He grabbed her hand to kiss it, but she yanked it away before he could. "At your service." He put on a smile and redraw his hand.

The larger man took off hat and bowed to her. "The name's Timothy Dugan, but call me Dum Dum." He waved his hat for a second before putting it back on his head. "It's a pleasure."

That name was familiar to her. They were with the Howling Commandos, which meant that Barnes and Rogers were back. That also meant that she wouldn't be bored anymore, though Salty would rather she be bored. "And you're okay with people calling you Dum Dum?" She asked eyeing him. She would not be okay if someone called her that. She might have to kill someone over that.

He shrugged it off. "I don't mind it. I rather like the nickname. Funny, dunna think?" His whole body shook as he laughed. "And I would beat the man who used it to insult me."

Toni could've spouted something about what if a woman insulted him, but she decided against that, which she was rather proud of herself for not starting anything. "If you say so." She paused.

"I do," he replied letting out another laugh. "What about you? Do you have a nickname?"

"None that I'll say in public," she winked, "but the name is Toni…Sark." She stumbled over the last name. She had a few bedroom nicknames, but they did not need to know them.

Gabe turned to Dum Dum and said, "She's the one Barnes won't shut up about."

"I can see why," he responded.

Her eye twitched. They were talking about her in front of her as if she wasn't there, and worse, Barnes was talking to people about her. Why was he talking about her? Maybe, he needed a good slap. "I'm right here!" She stated as she stomped her feet. She puffed as she looked away. "And I'm awesome," she added.

They both laughed. "You're something different," Gabe stated. "Why are all the good ones taken? The Captain has Agent Carter."

Toni's eye twitched again. "Barniez Boy doesn't have me," she stated annoyed. "He can't tame this." _And Sassy does not have Steve yet._ She wasn't sure why that was so important to her, but she kept thinking it.

"Again, you're something else." He paused. "Barniez Boy?" Gabe asked. "I might start using that."

"He probably wouldn't like that," Toni said. Sure, it was a nickname, but she wasn't sure if he would like it, not that she was trying to make him happy. She didn't care if he was. "So what are you guys up to?" she asked, glancing around.

"We're taking a break. We're going to play some poker," Gabe answered.

"I'm pretty good at poker." Toni boasted. "Maybe-" She jumped when she noticed a shadow change.

"Are you okay?" Dugan asked. "What got you so scared?" He followed her glance into the tents, trying to figure out what she was looking at that scared her so much.

"Not scared." Toni couldn't take her eyes off the spot and she knew she wasn't fooling anyone.

"Why don't you come with us?" Dugan stated as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder. Toni glared, but she didn't shrug him off. "Come show us how good you're at poker."

Toni glanced back at the shadows. "You won't know what hit you."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

The Howling Commandos were an interesting group to say the least, and that was putting it mildly. She thought the Avengers were a crazy group, but these people were something else, and she had to say she was okay with that. "Four of a kind," she stated as she laid down her hand.

Jim Morita let out a chuckling sigh. "We're getting our butts kicked. Who taught you how to play?" He glanced at her before staring at his cards. After a sigh, he placed the cards on the table.

Toni smiled. "Wouldn't you like to know!" she laughed as she eyed the cards in everyone's hands. Pokers had been one of few fun things she had picked up from the boarding school that her father sent her. It had been how she had interacted with the other students, even if she didn't make any friends playing it.

"I would, so I can beat the person who taught you. At this rate, you'll be taken all of me money," Montgomery Falsworth stated as he placed his cards down on the table.

Jacques Dernier glanced at her before putting down his own cards. "Bien plus qu'un joli visage."

Her smile got even bigger. "Vous n'avez encore rien vu," she stated as she leaned forward in her chair.

Gabe turned to her. "Vous parlez français. Vous êtes impressionnants femme," he said. "See I told you French helps you get women." He elbowed Morita.

"Vous êtes instruit, contrairement au reste de ces hommes." Dernier stated, with a smile.

"Hey! Hey, so not nice," Toni stated. "And that's my job."

"I feel left out," Dugan stated as he folded. "Maybe, I should learn French."

Gabe laughed. "You might not like what you hear," he teased as he played with his cards. He hadn't folded yet, and he was playing with his hand as if he was proud of it.

Falsworth laughed. "I think she would make a fine additional to the team."

"I feel special," Toni responded. "So Jones, let's see your hand." She turned the attention back to the game. Her competiveness was coming alive in her and she wanted to win this round.

"O', I got the last name," he stated as he played hurt. "Why-"

"You have to earn that from her." A man stated.

"Only for people I like." Toni jumped and turned to Steve, who was giving her a long look. "Whatcha doing, Cap?" she asked, forgetting about the poker game. She felt herself light up at the sight of him, and she had no idea why. He probably was going to lecture her about something. He did look upset.

Before Steve could answer, Dugan asked, "Come to watch her beat us, Rogers?" He turned to Gabe, who had yet to show his cards and was the only one who hadn't folded. "Unless Gabe has something up his sleeves."

"You wish you had my hand," Gabe teased as he waved his cards slightly.

"Let's see them," Toni stated as she turned back to Gabel and the game. "Maybe, if you win, I might call you by your first name." She winked at him.

"I might win then," Gabe stated.

Dugan laughed.

"I think we found a new game," Falsworth stated as he leaned forward.

Toni let out a chuckle. "That's a game you'll all lose," she stated. "C'mon, Jones. Let's see that hand. Can you beat my four of a kind?" She put on her evil smile. Yes, he might beat her, but the chances were low. She remembered all the cards that were played and she knew what was left.

"I'll leave you all be then," Steve stated. He was standing very stiff.

"You don't want to see me win, Steve?" Toni asked. "It might knock these fellas off down a few pegs." There was something up with him, and it annoyed her slightly. She couldn't deal with his moods; it was like he was a woman on her period.

"It's you who needs to be knock down," Gabe stated. He waved his cards. "Such an ego on you."

"I have to get ready for the next base," Steve said. He glanced at Toni before he turned to leave. His tone was hard.

Toni stared at his back for a few seconds before realizing that she wanted to chase after him. She had no idea of where that came from, being that he was being distance. She glanced at Gabe for a second before saying. "I quit. Vous gagnez," she said as she stood up quickly. Taking a deep breath, she chased after him before Gabe could respond.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni was infuriated because she kept breaking her goddamn rules. She did not chase after people to talk about their feelings. That was too much drama for her, so why in the hell was she chasing after him? She had already talked it out with Rogers, so why did she have to do it again? She thought that they dealt with this, or maybe it was something else… Did something happen to Barnes? Was that why he was being distance? _NO!_ Her mind screamed. She wouldn't be able to deal with that. _You have no one else to blame besides yourself,_ she yelled at herself. She shouldn't have allowed herself to get close. She shook her head, because she couldn't go there. If she did, she would go crazy. She also didn't like chasing after Rogers, who walked way too fast. She couldn't keep up with him when he did his angry walk.

Shaking her head in annoyance, she spotted him a few yards away. "Steve," she yelled.

Steve stopped and turned away. "Toni."

After she got him, she crunched down and rested her hands on her knees as she took a few deep breaths. "You walk away too fast," she stated after a minute.

"You could've finished your game," he responded.

"You left in such a hurry. I wanted to make sure you're okay," she stated. Out of breath.

Steve smiled lightly. "I didn't want to bother you guys."

There was something up with him and it wasn't because he didn't want to bother her. It was something else; it had to be. He didn't sweat the small things. "You offer to listen if I needed to talk, though I don't need to talk, but yet, you won't talk to me. You can talk to me." She paused. "If this is about Peggy, you can say it. I know I can get her to say yes to you." Why was she trying so hard? She was sure he didn't need her help.

He glanced at her. "Thanks, but I'm fine with everything. I don't need help with Agent Carter." He turned away quickly.

Once again, she was staring at his back and it so frustrated her. Why did he have to be like this? And people thought she was stubborn. "Fine, Steve," she stated, looking away from him.

"You sound mad."

"I'm not mad."

Steve sighed. "I can tell when you're mad."

She narrowed her eyes. "You can only think you can. I'm not mad." Okay, she was annoyed, but she wasn't going to tell him that. If he didn't want to talk to her, he didn't have to; she wasn't going to force him like she wanted to.

"Just-"

"There you two are," Phillips stated as he stepped toward them. He was eyeing Toni as if she was in trouble.

"Hey, Salty! What's up?" Toni asked as she hopped to him. She didn't know what it was, but she was happy to see the Colonel, who was a thrill to tease.

"You and that ridiculous nickname." Phillips stared at her for a few seconds, before he turned to Rogers. "I have something to discuss with the both of you. Come with me," he stated as he waved for them to follow.

Toni wasn't sure what he wanted to talk about with her and Rogers. If he wanted to talk about her device, he wouldn't need Rogers, and if it was about destroying the bases, they wouldn't need her. She hadn't been invited to those meetings, though it wasn't like she needed to be there. She didn't want to be there.

"Yes, Sir," Steve answered as he followed after the Colonel without a second thought.

The rebel in Toni stood there for a few seconds. She hated this following orders without question. She liked to question; she was a scientist. She didn't take anything at face value, which was another rule she lived by.

Phillips stopped and turned back. "You coming, Sark?" he asked.

And again, she hated that last name. "Yea. Yea," she stated as she waved them off.

Steve glanced back. "No time to be childish," he stated.

Her eye twitched. He was really sounding like the future Rogers. "Coming, Rogers," she responded, ignoring the twitch in his eyes at the sound of his last name.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

"No, there's no way in hell in that she's going," Steve protested loudly.

Listening to Rogers go off like that, just pissed Toni the hell, but she remained quiet for now. Though he infuriated her with his chauvinist ass, she wanted to listen to what Phillips had to say.

"Steve, calm down," Barnes stated. He was standing on the other side of a table, staring between Toni and Steve. "I think Toni is going to kill you if you don't."

Toni glared at Barnes. She wasn't going to kill Steve, just maim him enough to remember that he shouldn't ever doubt her.

Steve glanced at Toni from the corner of his eye before he turned to Phillips, who was standing next to Barnes. "She doesn't need to go out. We can handle this on our own."

"You have to be reasonable, Steve," Peggy stated, who was also in the tent. "We need someone to hack Hydra's system and we only have two people who can currently do that: Mr. Stark and Corporal Sark."

"And we can't send out Mr. Stark," Phillips stated as he turned to Toni. His eyes said it all. He needed her to do it.

Toni blew out slowly, not sure what she should do. She could change the future by going out on this mission, but at the same time, she couldn't risk her father's death. Her father had been very involved with the SSR, but she was sure that he didn't go out into the field. He didn't get his hand dirty. "I can go. Nothing to lose."

Steve turned to her. "What do you mean you have nothing to lose?"

He was staring at her with such an intense look that she thought she was going to explode. _He needs to relax,_ she thought to herself. "You have more to lose if Stark goes out," she stated as her eyes flicked to her father, who was sitting away from the table. "If I die, no big deal," she stated, regretting it a few seconds later.

"No big deal?" Steve asked, pissed. "You have a-"

"Steve, relax," Barnes said, eyeing Toni. Even if he was trying to calm Steve down, Barnes was giving her the look.

People needed to stop looking at her as if she was going to kill herself. Yes, once and awhile she had those negative thoughts, but she would never kill herself. "It isn't like that," she muttered. "And I'm going."

"You don't need to go," Steve countered. "Someone else can go. You don't need to go on the front line. Stay here."

That was it; he was Rogers again to her and she was going to find some way to beat the living shit out of him. "It is because I'm a woman?" she snapped.

He looked at her stun; it took a second to respond. "That isn't it. You just don't need to go out."

That was exactly it; he didn't think a woman could do it, but she knew it was a common belief in this time. At least, Salty believed in her. "You can't tell me what to do, Rogers."

"I'm a Captain."

"So? Like that changes anything. I don't give two shits what your rank is," Toni snapped as she turned to him.

"Sark," Phillips stated with a warning tone.

Toni stepped back and glanced at Phillips between turning back to Rogers. "I'm going." He was turning into his future self and it infuriated her. He was treating her exact the same way. When did he get the right to tell her what to do? She could handle herself.

"You aren't fully healed yet. Why don't you let someone else go?" Rogers countered.

"She's a soldier just like you, Rogers. If she agrees, she'll go," Phillips stated.

Rogers turned from Toni and stepped around the table to the Colonel. "We can't let her go out. Schmidt seems to have an interest in her. It's too risky to send her out. Did you forget?"

Peggy stepped to the table toward the Captain. "No one has forgetting anything."

Toni eyed Peggy as she inched her way toward Rogers. Why in the hell was she trying to comfort him? He was being a total dick. He didn't need that. "Skully got lucky before," she muttered. Besides, she knew they were going to be caught, but she couldn't tell them that.

"And we'll have the upper hand this time," Barnes added. He stepped away from Phillips and made his way toward Toni. "Besides, Toni has a mean right hook," he smiled as he put his hand on her shoulder and squeezed.

"I can show you again!" Toni yelled as she stepped out of his grip and waved her fist at him.

Phillips let out a sigh. "Between Rogers and Carter and you and Barnes, I feel left out."

There it was again; her eye was twitching. Why did everyone think there was something between her and Barnes? There was nothing and there would be nothing between them. "O', Salty. You just like to mess with me."

He narrowed his eyes at her. "Stark will go over with you with what you need."

Howard stood up and crossed to the table. "That's if you can handle being in a room with me."

Toni's patience had gone out the window, well if there was a window. "You just like to poke," she stated.

Rogers took a step forward Toni. "I don't like this," he stated. "She doesn't need to go. Stark can teach someone else."

Phillips took a deep breath. "We have already decided. She's going."

Toni was about to snap, which she didn't need to do in front of everyone. Shaking her head, she left and didn't turn back when she heard her name. How did she miss this? How could she not notice that he was the same ass as before?

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni took a few deep breaths as she tried to calm herself. She was useless when she was like this, and she usually did very stupid things like going out into the woods alone. She may have been imagining things, but her stalker was back and he was after her again. She should tell someone, but if she did that, she wouldn't be able to find out what he wanted or who he was; plus, she wouldn't have another second to herself as Barnes and Rogers would never leave her side. Or she would be stuck in some lab with her father as if she was something that needed to be protected. She didn't need to be protected; she could protect herself.

Shaking her head, she slowly made her back to her tent, but the shadows were jumping. _You're going crazy,_ she told herself. She kept flinching every time she saw movement, which could be attributed to a few things and not her stalker. _Stop this._ She couldn't let this get to her, or she would lose it. She needed to get her shit together.

"Toni!"

She jumped almost two feet into the air. "Holy shit fuck," she cursed as she turned to the person who called her name. Barnes, who stood a few feet away, looked like a lost puppy that needed a home and the look he was giving her felt like he was asking her for a home. "Barnes, this is not how you get a nickname."

"Apparently, you got one for me, well according to the Commandos." He smiled.

"So they told you." She wasn't expecting that, though she didn't know what she was expecting. She took a deep breath, trying to relax.

He waited for her to say something, but when she didn't, he spoke, "Tell me what's going on in that head of yours."

"I hear you talk about me to them." Her mind was a dangerous place, and he did not need in.

His smile was so damn big and it was hard for Toni to resist. "I can't get you off my mind."

"You're a flirt."

"So are you."

Toni let out a sighing chuckle. "Been flirting all of my life, and I'm not going to stop."

Barnes crossed to her, stepping into her personal space. He seemed to like doing that. "Tell me what's going on," he stated. "Why are you jumpy?"

"I'm not jumpy. Rogers is just exasperating." She would rather talk about her anger than her fear with Barnes.

"So he's Rogers again," he teased as he took a step closer. "I have a chance now." He winked at her.

She took a step back as she narrowed her eyes. "What are you talking about, Barniez Boy?"

"I don't know if I like that," Barnes muttered. "Give me something else."

"You can't pick your nickname!"

"Not for me?" he asked with a smile. His teeth were showing this time. "I'm not like Phillips… or Steve. I would like to think I'm different."

Toni wasn't in the mood to deal with his flirting. "What is it, Barnes?" she asked, not having the energy to fight.

"I'm sorry." He said with his hands in his pocket.

She glanced at him. "For what?"

"For making you jumpy. I did follow you back in New York."

She gawked at him, not sure what to make of it. He couldn't be her stalker as there were a few times that she felt eyes on her and he was with her. "It isn't you," she stated.

"Then tell me what's going on."

Barnes wasn't the type of guy she envisioned herself talking to. He was a flirt, someone to have fun with, but there was something that drew her in. It was something that she was fighting. "Do you think I should stay too?"

He put his hands on her shoulders and looked her in the eye. "I want you safe, but there's no stopping you and I'm not going to try. I tried last time, remember? It didn't work." He stared silently into her eyes for a second before he added, "I know you can take care of yourself."

"Thanks." That meant a lot to her.

"But that isn't what's bothering you," he stated, giving her a weak smile.

Toni spun out of his hands. "You have some dimples on you." She didn't want to talk right now.

He reached for her and pulled her in. "I have been told that," he stated as he held her. "You can tell me." He paused. "Do you think someone's following you again?" He asked, not letting go.

She tried to push him away, but he held her tight. What was people with hugging her? Did they not know she hated hugs? "I'm fine. Just angry. Don't make me hurt you."

"That might be fun."

Toni let out a small laugh. Barnes knew how to make her laugh even if he was an unbearable flirt. "You're something else." She pushed him off and this time, he let go. "I'm going to go now."

"Don't worry too much."

"I don't worry," she stated as she stepped away.

"Still," he paused. "You are safe. I won't let anything happen to you. Remember that."

There he went again, pulling at her heart strings. He knew how to get to her; he would be dangerous if she let him too close, which was a problem. He was already too close. _Damn it all,_ she cursed in her head. "I can take care of myself, Bucky, but thank you!" She laughed when she noticed him freeze. He was really cute when he was quiet. "See ya later!" She waved goodbye as she darted off

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those who wonder what was said in French:
> 
> Bien plus qu'un joli visage : More than just a pretty face
> 
> Vous n'avez encore rien vu : You have seen nothing yet
> 
> Vous parlez français. Vous êtes impressionnants femme : You speak French. You're awesome woman
> 
> Vous êtes instruit, contrairement au reste de ces hommes : You're educated unlike the rest of these men.
> 
> Vous gagnez : You Win
> 
> Pardon me for my French. I am not good at languages. Only took Spanish and I didn't do so well.
> 
> I would like to thank Ayahne, who helped me correct the Google translations.
> 
> Anyhow, I hoped you enjoyed this chapter and poor Toni, she is all confused. She doesn't know what's she feeling.
> 
> And with the nicknames for Barnes, I was thinking Toni might give him to depending on how close she gets to him.
> 
> Well until next time.


	20. The Fear of the Unknown

Toni didn't know what they meant by a Share Crop, but it had to be an insult, if she was to judge by the looks. There were so many looks that it drove her up the wall. Why didn't Peggy get all of these looks? Why was it just her? Peggy was a woman too, though she didn't act like her which was what the asshole had told her. Guys thought she was promiscuous, a tease, and that angered her, even if it wasn't entirely false. She had slept with a fair number of guys, but she wasn't a slut. She was just a woman, who was proud of her sexuality. She was proud of who she was, even if some thought she was promiscuous. What did it matter who she slept with? Why did it matter to anyone? She wasn't hurting anyone. It was her own damn body. She really hated this time, because a woman couldn't do anything without being called a slut. If a woman wasn't married by now, she must be a lesbian or a failure as a woman.

She took a deep breath as she made her way to her tent. She had a few things to pack before they were off for another location. This time they were heading to a base, near some large city. Toni couldn't say which city as Phillips didn't tell her, just telling her to pack. It was annoying how he ordered her around, but she supposed that he was doing his job. He was the Colonel and all.

Halfway to her tent, she noticed something along the tent. At first, she thought it was her stalker and almost flipped out, but after a few seconds, she realized that it was a fight between two idiots. They had to be idiots as only idiots would fight a comrade. Like an ugly car accident, she was unable to look away, and as she watched, she recognized one of the idiots: Bucky. Why in the hell is he in a fight? She thought. He wasn't someone who got into fights. Surprisingly, it was Rogers, who she was still mad at, that got into fights.

Not wasting another second, she made her toward the idiots, wondering why Barnes was fighting, but it only took her a few seconds to realize why. He was beating up the Asshole who kept calling her 'Fire Rocket.' She still did not know his name, but she didn't need to know his name to want to punch him in the face or somewhere lower. However, that didn't mean she or anyone else should.

Toni rushed over as she saw Barnes threw him to the ground. She couldn't allow Barnes to beat the shit out of him as it would end with him in the brig. "Bucky, stop," she yelled as she ran toward him. When he didn't respond, she yelled once more, "Stop!" She grabbed his arm and tried to pull him back. She didn't know what it was, but nothing she did disturbed him. Sure, he was stronger than her, but she at least should've been able to do something. "Barnes!"

At the sound of his last name, Barnes suddenly stopped and dropped the Private, who land with a thump. "Toni," he uttered. He looked surprised.

"What the hell are you doing?" Toni snapped as she kneed down to the Private, who was trying to push himself up. "Are you okay?" she asked as she tried to help him. Covered in blood and dirt, he looked like he had gone through the ringer. Though she couldn't stand the man, she didn't want him dead. That was reserved for a very special person.

The Private glanced up at her with a smile. As he tried to get to his feet, he placed a hand on her knee and squeezed. "I didn't know you cared, Doll Face," he stated as he winked at her.

"Get your grumpy ass hand off her," Barnes ordered as he reached down to him; however, Toni batted his hand away. He was clearly shook. "Toni." He was giving her a pleading look.

She sent Barnes a warning glare before turning back to the Private. "You're funny," she stated with a hard smile. She shoved his hand off her and stood slowly. After a brief hesitation, she helped him up.

He leaned on Toni slightly to her annoyance and put his arm around her. "And I didn't even have to pay you?"

Upon hearing him, Barnes went for the Private again, but Toni wouldn't let him. She pushed the Private, who was very unstable on his feet, back and stepped toward Barnes, putting her arms up to block him. "Barnes, stop. I don't need you to defend my honor," she snapped. "Now calm down."

The Private hobbled behind her; his left eye was slowly turning black. "She doesn't need you," he teased.

This man was getting on her nerve and she was this close to letting Barnes beat the shit out of this man, but she doubted Rogers would be happy about that. Why did she have to be the reasonable one? Did no one understand why that was a very bad idea? She didn't know what reasonable was. "Look, that's one thing we can agree with," she smiled evilly. "I can handle this dog on my own. Not his fault that he's a teeny weeny goon and can't get a hot dame. And let me tell you, I'm too hot for this dog."

The Private's smiled dropped and it was replaced with a glare. "Why you?"

"Well, if the shoes fits," Toni shrugged as she eyed him. The Private looked like he was going to collapse from his injuries. "But are you okay? Do you need me to take you to the medical tent," she asked, switching her tones.

"I don't need your help, Rug Muncher," he stated as he whipped the blood from his mouth. His semi-joking mood had turned completely sour and he was shooting daggers with his eyes.

"Apologize, now!" Barnes ordered. His fists were balled.

Though the Term that the Private used wasn't familiar, it didn't take her much to realize what the Private meant by it. He was an ass, who needed to be slapped a few times, but she could deal with the insults even if they made her sick to her stomach.

"What?" The Private stated. "She's either one of those or promiscuous slut."

"Don't you call her that," Barnes yelled.

Toni took a deep breath as these idiots were frustrating her to no end. "Go Private before I beat you, and I hit harder than he does. Trust me." She glanced to Barnes, giving him a look.

"Then you'll both end up in the brig," he smiled. "Unless you-"

Toni's eye twitched. "Do you really want to threaten the friends of Captain America?" She hated to name drop Rogers, but the facial expression was more than enough to ease that guilty feeling. Plus, the Private left without another word, though he was huffing and puffing as he walked away. She waited until they were alone before she turned to Barnes. "What the hell? Why did you attack him? You could end up in the brig. Do you want to end up there?"

Barnes took a step toward her. "I told him that if he ever touched you again, I would beat the shit out of him. He touched you, so I touched him." He didn't look sorry at all.

"Who told you?" Toni demanded. It was probably Peggy, who couldn't keep her mouth shut. She was seriously going to change her nickname to Loud Mouth.

"Doesn't matter. He needed to be taught a lesson," he answered, proud of himself. "No one should talk to a lady like that. And imagine what Steve would have done if he heard."

Toni let out a tiny chuckle, because it would have been hilarious, well not to the Private who would have shit his pants. "You don't need to protect my honor, Barnes."

"I got the last name again." He frowned.

"You don't get to play that card when you almost killed someone for no reason," Toni snapped. "What were you thinking?" She knew he wasn't. Or maybe he did, but why did he think he needed to protect her?

"He was out of line and if I didn't stop him, he wouldn't have stopped. I can't a-"

"Enough," she stated. "I can take care of myself. In case you didn't hear, I punched him in the face for touching me already." She took a deep breath. "Besides, I have no honor to protect. That ship sailed a while ago. Many men ago." She wasn't sure if that was something people admitted in this time, but judging from his face, it wasn't. Maybe, she shouldn't have told him and she was regretting it as she eyed his bright red face.

"W..W-what?" he shuttered, which was so not Barnes like. It made her laugh, even if she was mad at him.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni almost squealed at the sight of the core that her father had placed in front of her. Once she configured her device with the core, she should be able to go home. She couldn't wait. In the future, she could sleep with whoever she wanted, and no one would judge her… Okay, a few people still would like Future Rogers, who's greatest joy seemed to be judging and lecturing her. He seriously needed to get another hobby.

"I didn't know you could get that loud," Howard stated as he rubbed his ears. "I think I'm deaf. I think the whole lab is death." They were in a decent size lab, which fit 6 lab tables and 4 large lab equipment, and like the lab before, Stark had 10 or so people with him. All of them were male.

She smiled an evil laugh. "I can go louder!" she squeaked. Though he was the most annoying person on the planet, she had to give it to him: he wasn't all that bad, but she still hated him and he was still an idiot.

"Please don't," he chuckled. "Though I need to warn you, I wouldn't consider those cores stable at all. I suggest putting on protection gear." He set a few items of protective clothing onto the table in front of her.

She only sparingly glanced at them. "Trust me, I got," she stated as she removed the outer coating of the device. There was a small empty section in the center of the device, where the power source was supposed to go. Her best bet was to rework the hydra power core, using the ports already connected to the core's containment unit, instead of just using the core and trying to connect it directly.

Howard was still eyeing her. "So if you get knocked on your ass, I can make fun of you?" he teased.

Toni glanced up at her father and smiled. "Nope."

"That isn't fair."

She just laughed, because his pouty face was hilarious.

"Well if you need help, let me know. I can be useful, though I have no idea of what that device really does besides hating me. Must take after you." He was eyeing her.

She glared. "You're just jealous. Besides I don't need help falling on my ass." She paused. "I do that enough on my own."

"So you admit that you're not perfect." He let out a chuckle.

Toni had no issue in admitting her failures as she used them as learning tools, but she refused to admit it. "Never said I was, but I know I'm right up there!" He was starting to get on her last nerve with this small talk. Why couldn't he just leave her alone? She thought she was being mean enough. It usually worked with Future and Past Rogers.

He rounded the lab table with his eyes on the device. "Why don't you tell me what this thing does besides sucking out power?"

"You really want to know, don't you?"

He leaned down on the table, right next to Toni. "I'm wondering why Phillips wants you to complete it and why you're willing to do it. Is that why he let you out of that cell?" Howard wasn't stupid and given enough time, he could figure it out, even if he didn't believe it at first.

Toni glanced at him sideways, studying him. He was up to something as he knew better than to get this close to her. She narrowed her eyes at her filthy father, who was covered from head to toe in some kind of Hydraulic fluid. He also looked like he hadn't been sleeping, which worried her slightly. Just Slightly. It wasn't because she cared; she just didn't want him to work himself to death. He needed to be alive to meet her mother. "When the last time you slept or took a shower?" she asked. "You smell."

She tried not to laugh when he smell checked himself. "I don't smell too bad." He leaned closer. "Now what does it do?"

The future Genius hoped to be gone by the time he figured it out, because she didn't want to be here when he learned that she was his daughter. "Well, it's a time travel device! For you see, I'm from the future and I'm stuck in the past until I fix it. How could you not figure it out? There was so many clues," she stated with a smile. However, at the moment there was no way he could believe her, and he may even discredit later on his own if she said it first.

"Okay, so don't tell me!" Howard stated as he pushed himself off the table. His pouty face was funny and she could laugh at it all day. "I have things to do." With that, he left her alone to her pleasure.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

When Toni left the lab, she couldn't feel the fingers on either hands. That Hydra core seemed to have the power she needed, but it kept sending a nonstop flow throughout the device. She hadn't figured out how to limit the power of the core so it would only spit out power when she wanted. It also kept dimming the lights, which annoyed everyone in the lab including her father who eventually kicked her out. She couldn't believe it at first, but he told her that she had played with it enough. She figured it had to do with her numb fingers as he had seen it shock her a few times.

She glanced back at the huge metal lab door before she walked away. She didn't make it far, running into Jones and Dugan, who smiled at the sight of her. "So what are you two up to?" She asked, eyeing them. "And should I be scared?"

Gabe's smile grew larger. "We were looking for you," he stated. "You're a tricky one to find."

Something was up. "Why?" she asked, slowly.

"To make up for beating you in poker, I thought we would all go out for drinks, well unless you're too classy for that," he said.

"You didn't beat me. I forfeited. There's a difference," she countered. "We can go another round if you like." She gave him a big smile. "Want to go?" She waved her numb fist at him as she hopped around like a boxer. Jones laughed. "It doesn't have to be a poker game. It can be anything else. A drinking contest? I can outdrink any one!" Toni had no idea of where this energy was coming from.

"Most ladies wouldn't admit that," Dugan stated with a loud chuckle.

"I don't know if I would consider myself a 'lady.' Being a lady is too boring," she stated, waving it off. "I rather have fun."

Jones laughed. "Then let's go. Then you can help me get some attractive dames."

"And what about me?" Dugan asked.

Toni smiled. "I can be a wing man to the both of you!" she cheered as she marched pass them. "Let's head out." Though she needed this break from everything (this included Rogers and Barnes), she wanted to get some whiskey into her system. She hadn't had any good to drink since traveling to this time.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

The whiskey, not as good as she was used to, burned her throat on the way down, and it felt good. It numbed her system just like she wanted; it numbed her to the world. She hadn't had a drink in a while, and god, did she miss it! In the future, she could barely go a day without a drink, which was a serious issue; however, it wasn't an issue that she wanted to think or talk about. It… wasn't like she got drunk all of the time; she just enjoyed how it made her feel. She felt free with each passing second as her worries just seemed to disappear. Even her nightmares disappeared if only for a few hours.

"I hope you can hold your liquor," Gabe stated as he took a slip of his drink.

She smiled, slightly dizzy. She wasn't lying when she said she could handle her drinks. After finishing the glass, she spoke, "Don't want to challenge me now?" She winked at him. Toni was told that she was an unbearable flirt when she was drunk, though she knew that wasn't true. She was always a flirt and it was never unbearable.

Gabe let out a laugh. "We have to be careful. We have a mission tomorrow, which means we can't drink too much."

Though she would never admit it, there had been a couple times that she had been hungover or even dunk when she flew the Iron Man Suit. It wasn't because she meant too; it just happened, and it wasn't like anything was going to happen. She had JARVIS if something were. Future Rogers had been suspicious of her a few times, but he didn't accuse her of it. If he had, they would've been a fight, which was what he might've been trying to avoid. "No worries," she said as she waved it off. "What about that girl for you?" she asked, pointing toward a few woman on the other side of the bar. "They can't say no to a man in uniform."

"To Gabe, they can," Dugan teased as he took a slip of his drink.

"Ha Ha," Jones replied. "They would prefer me over you."

"I think you're all wrong," Falsworth said as he interrupted the three. He had a drink in his hand and a smile on is face. "Don't you agree, Toni?"

"Well, I do like your accent better," Toni teased. "So much better than theirs." She leaned toward him with another glass of whiskey in her hand. "I'm a sucker for accents."

"Oh, really," Falsworth stated with a huge smile.

"Don't get any ideas," Jones said to Falsworth with a laugh. "Barnes will hurt you."

Toni's eye twitched. She did not belong to Barnes. "Well to any girls," she clarified as she took another slip. "Maybe, you can teach these two!"

"I think my French can do the trick," Jones stated as he got to his feet. "It's irresistible."

"Okay, let's see." Toni challenged as she raised her glass. "This should be fun."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

You're overreacting, she told herself as she stood outside of the bar in the cold. Temperatures had dropped by at least 20 degrees and Toni could see her breath, but she had no interesting of going back inside. Not even the call of the Alcohol could get her back inside, and it wasn't because of the Howling Commandos or the catcalling pigs. It was because of the guy who asked her to dance. Ignoring her gut which could've been the alcohol talking, she agreed. The man was a good dancer who kept his hands where they belonged, but there was something wrong. She could feel it.

When he asked her to dance, she wasn't paying attention to him or his face as she was too distracted by Barnes who was talking to some dame. She had no idea of why Barnes was flirting when some chick in front of her. All it did was make her mad, which was probably why she said yes to the dance, but she refused to say that she was jealous of some ugly woman. She had to like someone first before she could be jealous and she didn't like him like him. However, when the man spun her around and started to speak, she froze. Though she couldn't be a hundred percent, he was the man who pinned her against the wall in the alley. As fast and sneaky as she could, she bolted from the man and left the bar.

It's the whiskey, she told herself as she took a few deeps breath. The alcohol was messing with her thought process, making her overreact. This was all in her head; she was imagining this all, which was what she did. She couldn't let herself be happy, not that she could really consider herself happy being stuck in the past, but she was in a better place than she usually was.

Relax, she told herself. Toni was bent over as she tried to ride out her fear. The cold, which wasn't too bitter thanks to the many drinks, wasn't bothering her, and it was only an afterthought to her overwhelming fear. If only, she had her suit; no one could be able to touch her. They would be running from her. She didn't have to worry about a fucking stalker, who haunted her every second just like Barnes' future death. She took a deep breath as she tried to calm herself.

"What got you scared?"

She jumped at the voice. "What the hell?!" she yelled as she turned to Dugan, who was standing over her.

"Is there something going on? I'd seen you jump before," he said as he covered her with his huge uniform jacket. "You shouldn't be out in the cold. You're freezing. We need you healthy for tomorrow." He watched her like she was something fragile, about to break.

His coat was heavy and it weighted her down, but she was thankful for it. She didn't realized that she was shivering so badly. "Who says I'm?" she asked softly as she held his coat close. It warm.

"I saw how you bolted." He eyed her as she didn't answer. "Why don't we go back in? I'll order you another drink."

The very thought of going back into the bar scared her; she couldn't face that man, though she wasn't sure why she was so scared. He couldn't hurt her when she was surrendered by people, and there was no way that Barnes, even if he was distracted by some girl, would let anything happen to her. "I'm going to head back," she announced.

Dugan glanced at the door before he looked back. "Let me get your coat and I'll walk you back."

"You don't have to," she objected. "You were having fun." She didn't want to take him away when he was having fun, enjoying himself. She also didn't need an escort even if it made her feel better.

"I can't let a pretty dame walk back by herself. I wouldn't be a gentleman if I did," he said.

"Well, I'm not the type of girl who need a gentleman," she answered, mad at herself. She didn't want to be the type of girl who needed to be rescued. She wanted to be the knight in her own story.

Dugan laughed as he turned to the door. "I'll be back." Toni didn't fight him.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni did have a slight hangover but it wasn't anything that she hadn't deal with before. Seeing that man yesterday had scared her sober, but it gave her nightmares that kept her up for hours even with the alcohol. She knew she couldn't keep doing this as it would go crazy. It could also hurt the mission… Maybe, she shouldn't go, but she promised Salty that she would. He had done a lot for her, so she would do the same for him, even if it risked the future. I wonder how much of the future I have already messed up, she thought as she took a deep breath.

Shaking her head, she left the quarters that she was sharing with Peggy on the base. It was nice for a change; however, they wouldn't be staying at this base for long. They were just staying long enough to complete the next mission and after that, Toni had no idea. She might be staying behind at the base with Howard studying whatever they were having her bring back or she could be going with the Salty and the others.

Toni took a deep breath as she went to meet up with Rogers and the gang. She was all geared out in army gear with her military belt heavy with two canteen, binoculars, and a small first aid kit. In a small bag that she had draped across her body, she had a compass, a Swiss army knife, and a pocket watch. On her back was a small bag, which held a few items that Howard had given her. Unlike regular soldiers, she did not have a rifle, not that she would know how to handle it. Instead, she had a hunting knife hidden in her boots and two hand guns in two leg holsters.

What she really wished she had was a bullet proof vest, but they didn't have those in this time. Why didn't they have them in this time? What would happen if she was shot at? Depending on where she was hit, she would be dead… Was this really a good idea? She wasn't really trained to go into combat, though Barnes had given her some tips. Salty had even taken her aside and gave her a quick run through, though Toni wasn't sure that was enough considering what happened the last time. She had combat experience, but that was with the Iron Man suit and not hand to hand combat.

However, Toni knew if she thought like that, it wouldn't end well.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

They were dropped off two mile from the hydra base as any closer, they would have been spotted. Normally, they would have dropped straight on the base, but they had to be sneaky about this one. They needed to get to the computers before they were destroyed. If Hydra were to spot them, they wouldn't get the chance, and they couldn't have that.

When they were within a quarter of a mile of the base, the group separated into three groups. Dugan, Jones, Dernier, and an unnamed soldier were in the first group. Rogers, Folsworth, Morita and a second additional soldier made up the second team. In the third group was just Toni and Barnes, who were going to stay back until they received the all clear signal. It would be easier for them to sneak pass the guards, if they were distracted by Rogers and the rest of gang.

Toni was lying down in a patch of dead snow covered grass, using her binoculars as she watched the two groups move toward the small well-guarded base. Her small form was almost invisible, while Barnes, also using binoculars, was kneeing next to her. He was only a few inches from her. "It seems like they're almost in place," she said as she stared at Rogers, who looked like an ant form this distance. He looks cute as an ant, she thought with a smile.

"Are you ready to go, Sark?" he asked. He scanned the area around the base, looking for anything surprising.

Her eye twitched. He of all people was not allowed to call her Sark. "I ready when you are, Barnes." She stated, stressing his last name. He had been like this since she admitted that she wasn't innocent. Sure in this time, women wouldn't admit that, but she thought he would get over it. Maybe, that was why he was chasing her. He wanted to steal her innocence. Figures, she thought, annoyed. Was all men like that? Granted, she was sex craze at times, so maybe, she couldn't talk.

He put down his binoculars and turned to her. "Are we going to play that game?" he asked as he returned the binoculars to their pouch.

"You started it," she argued as she put away her binoculars. She slowly pushed herself up into a sitting position and eyed Barnes, who looked ready for a battle with his rifle on his back.

"How so?" He asked as he got to his feet. He offered a hand to Toni, but she didn't take it.

"You're the one who started to act strangely," she stated, getting to her feet. She dusted the snow off her chest and her knees. "But we shouldn't talk about this now. Lead the way," she said as she waved him to go.

Barnes took a deep breath as he walked pass her. Toni eyed his back as they made their way slowly toward the base. They were crunched low as Barnes kept his gun pointed forward. He continuously scanned the area looking for any signs of movement or an enemy scout team.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni was shivering in the cold wind as Barnes and she were hunched down in dead shrubs right outside of the base. She had her gun drawn as she waited for Barnes' signal. He was looking for the right opening, and it wouldn't be long as most of the Hydra Soldiers were trying to stop Rogers, which was almost impossible with his super strength. However, Toni was worried about him, but she knew it wasn't needed. With his skills, he could take care of himself.

"Are you ready?" Barnes asked, whispering.

She took a deep breath and smiled through the pain of chapped frozen lips. "As I'll ever be," she said. She wasn't sure why she was so nervousness, but something didn't feel right. It's just the nerves, she thought. It was probably because of what happened the last time; the torture was still fresh in her mind. She didn't know if she could handle that again. The very idea of it freaked her out. Relax, she told herself. You know Steve wouldn't let you get hurt. She knew if she was captured again, Rogers would come for her and that was relaxing thought.

"I won't let anything happen to you, Toni," Barnes reinsured her, snapping her out of her thoughts. He was looking back to her with a smile.

She stared at him wondering why she thought of Rogers before Barnes. "I know," she said as she followed him out of the bushes. "Plus, I'll be harder to catch this time." She forced a smile.

"I bet," he stated as they stepped slowly. It would be over if they were spotted.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni had put her gun back into the holster as she hacked her way into the base, surprisingly this base was very high tech. It wasn't something that she expected in this time, though they did have Tesserac. She took a deep breath as the lock clicked, signaling she was in. "We're in," she said, turning back to Barnes who was served the look out. He nodded as he waved her back from the door. She backed away and allowed him pass.

He pushed the door open and slowly walked inside with his rifle up, looking for any sign of movement. "Clear," he replied as he stepped aside.

Toni entered and closed the door behind her. She was stuck by the heat, which felt almost unbearable compared to the cold; however, after she got over the shock, it felt nice. She just stood there for a few seconds as she allowed the heat to bath her. It was refreshing after that two mile hike in the snow; however, her lips still stung. I wish I had chapped stick right about now.

After she made sure that the door was secure behind her, she pulled out a small handheld device that Howard had given her. The device had an awkward shape to it, and it barely fit in her small hands, but it was a very useful device. When turned on, the device could map out a building using a special sensor which acted like sonar. "I got it," she stated. The base's layout appeared on the screen. "We just need to go down this hall, turn right, then left and after a few feet, turn left again." She left out a light chuckle. "Once we make it through that, there's just one more door that we have to get pass then we're golden."

"Then let's get going."

Toni followed behind Barnes directing him. "Shouldn't be much farther," she told him in hush tones. She was hearing fast moving foots steps, which seemed to be getting closer. They must be running toward the fighting, she thought as she heard something explode in the distance.

"You wouldn't mind me asking what's up," Barnes asked as he stopped at a turn. He glanced back at her before gradually looking round a corner. Seeing no one coming, he waved her on.

She glared at his back. It wasn't the time to bring this up, but she knew he wouldn't drop it. "There's nothing to tell. You're the one who been acting weird since I told you the truth."

"I have not." He glanced back at her as she didn't respond. "And dancing with that guy was what?" he asked, annoyed.

That was a total complete nightmare, but she wouldn't tell him that. If she told him that, she would have to admit that she thought her stalker was back. And if her stalker wasn't, then she was crazy, and she couldn't crazy. "He was just a random guy," she said.

"You don't seem like the girl to dance with random guys," he countered.

Toni stared at his tensed shoulders and almost laughed. He didn't think she was crazy; he was jealous, which was funny. However, him liking her wasn't a good thing. "Not like you? The guy, who's always picked up random woman?"

"Jealous?" he teased as he turned another corner. He didn't look back and kept forward.

"To be jealous, there must be something to be jealous of," she stated.

"I'm not the one who bolted out of the bar in a fit of jealousy," he counted as he rounded yet another corner. Before anyone could speak another word, Barnes shoved her against the wall and held her there for a few seconds. "Ssh," he ordered as the footsteps got louder.

"It was not in a fit of jealousy," she argued. She would not let him believe that.

"Ssh," he hushed, but he was smirking.

She glared at him as she listened to the fast moving footsteps. Judging by the sound, it was one person, who was either very heavy or heavily armed.

"Stay here," he ordered and he didn't step away until she nodded.

Toni watched Bucky as he rounded the corner. She didn't know what happened next, but she heard a struggle with a few colorful words and then something falling to the ground. Panic, she dashed around the corner with her gun in her hand, ready to use it, but instead, she was shocked to find Barnes standing over a body with a knife in his hand. Blood dripped from the blade. "Bucky," she uttered, shocked to see him like that.

He looked back at her as he wiped the bloody knife on the dead hydra soldier's clothing. Blood soaked the ground and he was careful not to step in it. "I thought I told you to stay," he said, putting the knife away.

"It might have worked if I was a dog." He glared, but she waved him off as she tried to get the picture of a dripping knife out of her mind. "Like I listen. Just ask Salty. I don't like orders," she said as she put her gun away and looked at the building map on the device. As she was looking, she added, "And you took down that man with a tiny knife?"

"I'm handy with a knife," He said. "Let's hurry. We have to get to the Data Center before they find that body, and it won't be long."

Toni nodded.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni and Barnes found the door to the Data Center in a few minutes, which was around the same time that the body was found. The alert was sounded the second the door was closed and locked behind them, but they both knew that wouldn't hold not with those hydra weapons.

The room was rather large with computer towers lining the two side walls, while several monitors lined a third wall. Halfway down the third wall was the control board for the huge computer, which all of the main controls were located. Besides a few filling cabinets on the fourth back wall and a metal table, there was no chairs or other furniture in the room.

"Whatever you have to do," Barnes started as he pushed a metal table in front of the door. "Do it now."

"You don't need to tell me twice," she said as she walked to the control panel. They were so many odd buttons on the panel that Toni didn't know what each of them did; it looked the Enterprise from the Original Season. Sure, she would figure it all out in time as she was awesome, but they didn't have time to figure it out if she were to judge by the monitors. A hand full of guards were on their way to the room, and each were heavy armed. "Just keep an eye on the monitors."

He glanced back at the door before he made his way over to the monitors. "You only got a seven or minutes at the best."

Toni got down on her knees and opened the pack on her back. "If Stark's correct, it shouldn't take me too long," she replied as she pulled out some tools. With a screwdriver in her hand, she crawled under the control board and removed one of the hard panel coverings. She needed to get to the wires if she wanted to hack into the system. Unlike future technology, there was no USB ports that she could plug into. A minute later, she was able to find the two wires that she needed. After to exposing the wires, she took out the same device from before and popped open the top. She took out two wires and split them so she could connect the wires to the control panel. After assuring the connection, she watched the device lit up, but it beeped a few times as the device struggled to make it through the fire walls.

Toni cracked her hands as this was nothing. She could hack anything. With a smile, she started typing away, and not even a minute later, she was in. Everything in the hydra's system started to flow into the device. She slide out and pushed herself up. "Anything?" she asked as she stepped to him. "It'll take a few minutes for it to copy."

Barnes didn't say anything before he turned to her. "We might be screwed," he muttered.

Toni turned to the monitors and gasped. Rogers' group, who were being pushed back, were handling themselves at least, while the second group was not. They appeared to need some help. It shocked Toni that a small base had so many soldiers, but she knew that she shouldn't have been. This base was important. It held some important secrets, which they had been trying to steal.

"It'll be harder for us to get out."

She stared at him, seeing how much he hated being here with her while his teammates were fighting. "Then go to them. Maybe, you can sneak up on the soldiers and surprise them. That might give our gang the upper hand. It shouldn't be too hard as the path is clear," she said as she pointed to the monitors. No one had come to data center yet, and the group that was heading toward them had changed direction. There was a small opening that could close at any second.

"That isn't the mission. The mission is to bring back that data; nothing else matters. I can't leave you," Barnes said. His voice was cold, unfeeling. "I need to get you and that device back to base."

Toni couldn't let this happen. This shouldn't be happening. She couldn't let someone die because of her. Shaking her head, she went back to the device to check on the process. It was about halfway done or so. "Go, Bucky," she demanded as she turned back to him. "If the teams are pushed back, we won't be able to get out of here, but if you help and you guys are able to keep them busy, I can sneak out on my own. Trust me."

"Toni."

"If I can sneak into Stark Industries, I think I can sneak out of this base," Toni said with a smile. "And I have my trusty guns." She padded her guns.

"Toni. I'm not leaving you."

"Don't make me last name you!" She yelled, pointing.

"Last name me?" he asked chucking.

Toni glared. "Listen, Bucky. I almost got it. You don't need to baby sit me. I'm pretty tough," she said while flexing. "And if you don't, I'll hurt you." She couldn't let anyone get hurt while they were protecting her.

He stared at her, thinking. "Fine," he stated, crossing to her. "But I want to do something first."

"Like what?" She asked, glancing back at the monitors.

Barnes grabbed her and pulled her to him, holding her close. "As we may not see each other, I want to-"

Toni wiggled as he held her tight against him. "Don't think like that. Why are you acting like this? We-" Before she could finished, Barnes smashed his lips against her and kissed her with everything that he had. At first, Toni didn't know what to make of it, and after she got over the shock of it, she was confused as to what to do. Did she kiss him back? Did she push him off? Why in the hell was she putting so much thought into a stupid kiss? She had never in her life put so much thought into a single kiss. It's because you care, she thought. She cared for him more than she wanted to admit. She cared for a lot of people that she didn't want to care about. Rogers, Barnes, Phillips, Peggy, the howling Commandos… All of them. Screw it. She leaned into him and kissed him hard.

Barnes pulled away a second later. "I don't care about your past. I don't care you have been with or who you haven't. I don't care about anything. I just want you."

"Bucky." She touched her chapped, cracked lips in shock. She could feel a drop of blood on her lip.

He glanced up at the monitors before he pushed the hair out of her face. "I'll be back. Can't leave you after that kiss," he stated, smiling. "I have to go," he said as he kissed her again.

"Go or else." She ordered, unsure of what to make of that kiss. Did she really want it? She wasn't sure, though she did know that it would only make matters worse for everyone, especially for her. She couldn't fall for a guy, for a dead man. That says wonders about me. Can only fall for guys I can't have.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni reached down for the device and checked the downloading process. She had lied to Barnes (and even herself) before and said it was downloading faster than it was. It was taking longer than she expected which was a testament to the strength of the system. "Bitch," she cursed when she laid the device back and glanced at the monitors. There were a heavy armed team of Hydra soldiers heading right toward her, and she knew she would not be able to hold them off. This could be the end for her, but she refused to let that ruin the mission.

A second later, she hid the hacking device in the power board's many wires and closed the panel. Making sure that Barnes or Rogers knew what to look, she scratched in a small symbol into the paint. She reached into the bag and pulled out another item, a small Stark Industries radio. She grabbed a flathead and forced the radio open, exposing the wires. Not caring if it ever worked again, she pulled out random wires and stepped to a random panel on the mother board. She pried it open and again picked some random wires, hoping that it wouldn't hurt the real device. Just as she connected the wires, the door to the computer room opened revealing three Hydra Soldiers, but one stood out. It was a woman, who was surprisingly the leader. Toni wasn't expecting that, but she didn't have time to worry about that.

"Destroy that thing," the Female Hydra Commander ordered, pointing to the device behind Toni. One of the nameless soldiers moved toward the fake hacking device.

Toni stepped to forward to block the soldier to buy time as buying time was the most important thing, even if it meant her death. He had his Hydra weapon pointed at her head, though no matter where he aimed she would be dead and there wouldn't be a body left for Rogers or… Barnes to find. Why were her last thoughts of them?

"Don't kill her!" the Commander yelled as Toni closed her eyes. "Just destroy that device before the Allies get what they need."

Both the Soldier and Toni were surprised, but that didn't stop him as the soldier shoved her out of the way. She landed on her ass had, but that wasn't going to stop her. Getting back on her feet, she went to tackle him but she was grabbed from behind. "Not so fast," she yelled as she threw her head back, nailing the other soldier in the face. Ignoring her daze, she picked up her right leg, and as hard as she could, she kicked him in the shin. He dropped her, and before he could get his baring, she spun and kicked him in gut, sending him to the ground.

Toni didn't have time to even think as the Commander hit her hard in the head, sending her to the ground. Stunned but not out, Toni reached for her gun and fired at the woman, but she was too fast. She struck Toni's arm, ruining her aim. Instead of hitting the Commander, the bullet hit the down Hydra Soldier, killing him. Toni tried to aim again, but the woman picked Toni up by the neck and slammed her down into the computer towers, which surprisingly didn't break under her weight.

The Genius tried to break the Commander's grip on her neck, but she couldn't pry the hands even an inch. With failing vision, Toni glimpsed up at up the woman as her grip tightened around Toni's neck. Toni never expected this woman to be this strong; she didn't even look like she could pick up 30 pounds let alone pick her up like a sack of potatoes. If this woman wasn't choking her to death, Toni might have called her pretty or be amazed by her, but she couldn't think with the lack of oxygen.

Then a light bulb went off in her head as she felt something in her boot. The knife, she thought as she reached down to her boot. She bent her knee, trying to get her boot closer. She wiggled her fingers trying to work the knife closer. Toni did a side glance to the remaining hydra soldier who had completely smashed the device. He turned to the Female Commander waiting for a command. "Bitch," she curse, as her vision started blacken.

"I was surprised to see you here. I never thought these stupid Americans would send you in," she said, her accent was heavy. "Not you; however, he'll be pleased."

"Who's he," she asked, as she felt the top of the blade. She would be out in a matter of seconds; she had to hurry.

"The Red Skull. He was told you were be here by a strange third party and I was sent to collect you."

Who was that third Party? Why would the third party tell Hydra? That freaked her but she used that fear to motivate her and she was able to pull the blade from her boot. Without a second thought, she brought the blade down on the Commander's arm, slicing into her flesh. The woman cursed loudly as the knife stuck into the arm. She dropped Toni, who landed hard on the ground.

Toni didn't have time to think or catch her breath; she had to strike now. She reached for the other gun and drew it before the Commander could pull the blade out. She took aim at the woman, but the other Hydra Soldier came flying at her. Turning to him, she fired and hitting him in the shoulder. He stumbled back, but it didn't stop him, and he continued his attack. Toni fired again, and this time he went down, but before she could do anything else, the Commander was up and on her again.

She punched Toni hard in the face. "Maybe, I can tell Schmidt that there was an accident. I don't know what makes you so special," she spit.

Toni couldn't feel her face, and her head was spinning. "Maybe, I can just kick your ass, Bitch," she replied, trying to reach for something else, anything else.

"Such a mouth on you," she uttered annoyed. "I wonder why no one killed you sooner."

"People love my mouth," Toni smiled, weakly, as she remembered the Swiss Army knife in her pocket.

The Commander looked away from Toni to the monitors and glared, not liking something. Her look could frighten young children, though it also scared her. She looked like she could skin someone alive. With a sickening scowl, she looked back to Toni, which told her that someone was coming and it wasn't Hydra. That lit Toni up and kept her fighting, but it didn't last for long. Before anyone could arrive, the fuming, irritated Commander picked her up and threw over her shoulder to carry her out. Fear rose up inside of her, knowing she was going to be tortured again, but at least, she was able to download everything into that device or so she hoped.

Her only hope was that Barnes and Rogers would find it. Just as the Commander marched toward the door, the Swiss army Knife dropped from the bag. Her eyes widened as she saw it dropped. She couldn't let it hit the floor or she would be screwed. She reached for it, panicking, as she felt it slip from her fingers. Just as she thought she lost it, she was able to get a hold of it. She pulled out a random tool and stabbed the woman in the face.

A second later, the Commander cursed and threw her cross the room. "You bitch. You're too much trouble."

Toni, who didn't have time to brace herself, landed hard, and she couldn't recall anything besides the extreme pain. Her head smack hard against the metal computer panel and whipped forward. After the pain ended, it was just pure never ending blackness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End for now! I hoped you enjoyed this chapter. Sorry No Rogers this time, but he shall be back in the next.
> 
> To answer some questions: This is will be a TonixSteve story eventually. Key Word: Eventually. It's just going to take some time for that to happen as Toni isn't going to fall for Steve easy. In the mean time, there is going to be some TonixBucky. At first, I wasn't planning on adding Bucky into the mix, but I find myself liking the triangle.
> 
> And any questions of who you think this third party is? Enter evil smile.
> 
> Until the next time


	21. The Anchor

Steve Rogers was a great many things but he wasn't a fool in any sense of the word. He was smarted, even before the serum; however, at the moment, he doubted his intelligence. His mind kept playing tricks on him and he found himself filled worry, fear and stupidity, which he hadn't felt in a while. Missions could not keep his mind off everything that was happening, though he had to admit that he really didn't know what was happening. And that just made anything worse: the not knowing. Fury didn't tell them anything besides the fact that items were stolen from Black Hawk and they had the ability to disrupt Toni's equipment. He was being very secretive and Steve couldn't help but think that was a bad sign. He had to be hiding something… though he shouldn't find that surprising. Fury was a spy after all.

Each time Steve even thought about asking, Fury sent him on a mission, barely telling him anything. He kept insisting that it wasn't important for him to know and that infuriated Steve to no end. Not only didn't that not settle his mind, it made him push harder. It made him lean harder on Fury, though he knew that man would never spill anything. That man was good at keeping secrets.

Shaking his head, Steve unclicked his seatbelt and kept his head low as he stepped out of the helicopter onto the helipad at Stark Tower, which he hadn't left except for missions. The propeller created wind batted him as he stepped away. Once he was a safe distance away, he stood up straight and turned back, watching the helicopter take off. "I don't trust Fury."

"He doesn't trust you either, if it matters," said Natasha, who was standing a few feet from him. She had gone on the last mission with Steve and followed every commander, but unlike him, she didn't question Fury.

"Do you trust Fury?"

She stepped away from him, toward the building's entrance. "I trust no one," she admitted.

He watched her walk away from him, but in his mind, he was watching Toni walking away from him. It was a mystery to him why he was envisioning Toni as Toni and Natasha looked nothing alike. Sure they were roughly the same height at five foot three inches though Toni could've been an inch or two shorter, but their shapes were different. Natasha was a curvier than Toni. Plus, Toni's dark hair, even when she had it up in a messy bun, attracted him every time.

When Natasha reached the door, she turned to him, studying the silent Rogers. "What set you off this time?" she asked.

Steve disliked that she knew him so well after a short amount of time, and when did he space out so much that it became expected of him? "It's nothing."

He took a deep breath as he tried to force out the image in his head. The image of Toni walking away from him and Bucky following after her haunted him. Though it wasn't importance now, he hated that Bucky became the person she turned to. Back in the old crummy apartment, it was him, but was the only reason she turned to him was because he was the only person there? No, that couldn't have been it. He had felt the connection between them. So what changed? Besides him becoming Captain America… Was that the reason? Did he lose her the second that he became that?

He remembered watching her leave and the intense urge to go after her. He would have if it wasn't for Peggy, who held him back with a single look. Though he didn't like it, he knew it was the right thing to do, because talking to an angry Toni was a very bad idea. Instead, he had to watch his best friend go after the woman of his dreams as he fought down his jealousy.

"Earth to Rogers. Is everything okay in that head of yours?"

Steve snapped out of his thoughts and focused on Natasha, who was staring at him like he was a child. "I'm fine," he said. "Why don't we go in?" He waved toward the door, feeling a few water droplets on him. It was about to rain, and it was going to rain hard.

Romanoff eyed him before turning toward the door. With her hand on the door's handle, she glanced back at him. "We can't have you pretending to be fine, Rogers. If you can't operate, then you will need to sit out."

The idea of sitting out didn't sit well with Steve. "If it gets to the point that I'm jeopardizing a mission, I'll be the first to point that out and I'll sit myself out."

Natasha didn't say anything and just nodded, but her stare was intense and it dug deep into Steve's soul.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

"Are you sure about this?"

Steve recognized the voice belonging to Pepper Potts, who he had seen a few times since Toni had disappeared. Pepper didn't like to be in the tower lately, calling it haunted, and Steve would have to agree. Even if the tower lacked a homely feeling, Toni's present was everywhere in the Tower. There wasn't a room in the building that didn't feel like her and her huge ego.

"We have to make it look like nothing's wrong," said Barton.

"But this feels wrong," Pepper replied. Her voice gave it all way. On top of being tired, she was worried. Deeply worried about something.

Steve walked pass Natasha, who looked unaffected by what she was hearing or seeing. "What's going…" He started but drifted off seeing one of Toni's Iron Man Armors. He couldn't tell for the life of him what Mark it was, but he knew it was one of the recent ones that she had created… or so he thought. "Why is that out?" he asked, his eyes narrowing. He glanced toward Rhodes who were sitting on a bar stool with a glass of something in his hand.

Barton stepped away from the suit, but he kept a few feet from Steve. Barton, though he would never admit to it, always kept a safe distance from Rogers as if he expected the Super Soldier to snap at any second. "People are starting to notice Toni's disappearance."

Though Steve understood why they wanted it quiet, he couldn't understand why that was startling or what that would have to do with the suit. People were going to notice as Toni was hard not to miss, but why did it matter? It wouldn't change anything. It wasn't like there was a ransom or anything for her. She was in the past, though they wouldn't want that out. "Why the suit?"

Rhodes, who Steve wasn't quite sure he liked, shifted in the stool. He looked highly uncomfortable in the Captain's presence. "They want to send it out, to give the illusion that everything is okay."

"I don't think she would want someone touching her suits," said Steve, eyeing Rhodes. "And you could always just say she's on vacation somewhere. I would assume she had been on quite a few vacations where she had gone MIA." His arms were folded across his chest. He was still wearing his Captain America uniform and he was quite filthy, covered in dirt and mud. There was even some blood.

"That won't do this time," Barton stated.

"Why is that?" Steve asked, almost snapping.

Rhodes took a deep breath. "Because it won't. It-"

"Whose idea was this?" Steve asked, interrupting Rhodes.

"Fury's," Natasha answered from behind him.

Steve turned to her and he couldn't help but glare at her non-expression. He couldn't understand how she could be so emotionless about things. "Why? What's he planning? This isn't just a show to the general public." That man was up to something.

"We have another lead on the items stolen from Black Hawk, and we have to move on it fast," Barton said. His eyed flicked to Natasha. "Fury believes it might throw them off if they see the Iron Man suit."

It made sense, but it still felt like a betrayal to let someone touch the suit. "And who's going to fly it?"

"There are only three people authorized to pilot the Iron Man Armors," J.A.R.V.I.S announced. "Miss Potts, Colonel Rhodes and Miss Stark."

Steve's eyes flicked to Potts only for a second, knowing that it would never be Pepper. She had never seen battle, let alone flown a suit. He turned to Rhodes, eyeing him. "You intend to go out?"

Rhodes shifted in his chair again, not liking the look from Rogers. "I can fly the Mark 7. I have flown the Mark 2 before."

"I didn't ask if you can fly it. I asked if you intend to go out," Steve restated, annoyed. His lack of sleep was getting to him and he was allowing his anger to grow.

"I do." Rhodes said. "This could help Toni, though I'm not going to enjoy the ass chewing that I'm going to get from her when she get back." His tone changed slightly whenever he spoke about Toni. It always changed when he talked about her. It was clear that Toni was important to him.

When Steve first met Rhodes, he had wondered if there was something between Rhodes and Toni for the longest time. He realized after a few conversions that they were just very closer and Rhodes was like a brother to her.

Barton chuckled. "Yea. I so don't want to be here when she finds that out. I foresee explosions," he said. "Lots of explosion and her chasing you down."

Rhodes let out a sigh. "She was mad when I borrowed the Mark 2. I hate see it when she finds out I took out the Mark 7."

"You mean when you stole the Mark 2, right?" Pepper corrected, glaring. "That was a legal headache."

"In my defense, Toni was operating the suit while in intoxicated and she was a threat to everyone around," Rhodes countered. "Just ask Romanoff. She was there."

Pepper glanced toward Natasha and glared. "Yea, I remember. You did nothing to stop her or discourage her."

"I was undercover at the time, and if I did, she wouldn't have wanted me around," Natasha responded with her arms folded across her chest. "I couldn't have helped it. She was emotionally unstable at the time."

Steve wasn't sure if he wanted to tell the room to shut it or to keep listening. He wasn't sure what happened to Toni, besides what was in the newspapers and they didn't tell him much. Even the folder that Fury had given him on Toni was limited. "Enough," he said, cutting them all off. "Back to the matter at hand." He waved toward the Iron Man Armor.

"There's nothing else to discuss, Rogers," Barton said. "We're going. Rhodes agreed. Nothing else to talk about."

"I understand," Steve replied, resigned to agree. It would be pointless to fight as it was clear they couldn't change their minds. "When do we head out?"

The room was silent at hearing that, and it was a few seconds later that Natasha spoke. "Fury thought it would be best if you sit out this time." She stepped next to him. "You need to rest. Stay behind with Banner. He should be back soon."

"I had enough rest," Steve countered.

Pepper stepped forward. "I have seen how hard you have been working to locate Toni, and I know you have been giving it your all, but you need to rest. How do you think Toni will react if you worked yourself to death?" Her voice was sweet and soft like a mother's voice.

Steve glanced down at himself; Pepper was correct. He was a mess inside and out, and he needed to rest. "When do you head out?"

Barton stepped away from the armor and crossed to the counter near Rhodes, who had gotten to his feet. "Now," he stated, picking up his bow. "Ready, Rhodes?"

Rhodes took a deep breath and stepped toward the suit. "Yes. Let's head out."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

It was odd to say the least to see Rhodes fly off in the Iron Man Suit. It was even weirder for him to remain behind, but they were all correct: he needed to rest. He was burning out at both ends and that wasn't good for anyone. If Toni could see him now, she would probably laugh. Toni would probably love to see him like this, because she saw him as Mr. Perfect, a guy who could do nothing wrong. He knew he was part of the reason why she though that, considering how hard he had been on her. He didn't mean to; he just didn't know how to handle her risky behavior.

"You need to rest, Steve."

He glanced over his shoulder to Potts who was standing in the doorway of Toni's personal lab. Being like a big sister to Toni, she was taking her disappearance hard, and it was clearly visible in her voice and appearance. She looked like she had been through hell and back.

"I try," he said. The whole in the floor had been repaired, making it look as nothing had happened and that stung a little as something had happened. They were missing a team member, and it wouldn't be the same until she returned.

Pepper took a deep breath. "If you can't sleep, go get clean up and eat. You can't go on like this."

He glanced back toward Pepper before pushing himself up. "Yes, Ma'am," he said with a weak smile. He could understand why Toni kept Pepper around, even if she was a bit controlling. Pepper was a kind soul, who took care of Toni and many others without a second thought.

"You don't need to Ma'am me, Steve. It's just Pepper," Pepper stated as she turned to leave.

"Yes, Ma-Pepper," he corrected, receiving a glare from Pepper.

"Now, go clean yourself up. Toni will be very upset if you dirty her lab."

He laughed. "I don't want that to happen."

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

It came rushing back to him in the shower after he had rinsed the soap off his body, and it had almost knocked him flat on his ass. With his hands pressed firmly against the cold tile of the bathrooms and his head down, he held himself up as the water pounded his back. He remained like that for what seemed like hours, and it was surprising that there was still hot water. If this was his apartment, the water would have turned ice cold a while ago, but he supposed Toni would have the best water heater there was in her buildings.

The flooding memories took hold of him and he couldn't rid himself of them. They were a haunting experience that he couldn't shake even when he turned up the water temperature. In a sense, they had glued themselves to him.

_Steve wasn't expecting the base to put up such a fight, and he really wasn't expecting to be pushed back, but that was what was happening here. They were being pushed back as more and more soldiers were coming out after them, and each had a highly advance weapons in their hands. These weapons were stronger than anything else that came before, and Steve wasn't expecting that, but he had to continue. He had to give Toni enough time or else this mission would be a failure and they were risking her life for nothing._

At first, Steve didn't realized that he had turned the water up even higher, and the water almost burnt his skin. "Relax," he told himself as he turned the water back down to normal levels. However, the memories started flashed before him.

_"Dugan," Steve said, calling into their communication devices._

_Dugan's response wasn't quick; it wasn't until a minute later that he responded, "We aren't doing so hot, Cap."_

_There was something in Dugan's voice that worried Steve. "What's going on?" he asked, glancing around at his team, all of which were engaging a hydra Solder. Steve just shield bashed one in a face as he flipped out of the way of a flame thrower. The flames came within inches of his skin. "What's your status?"_

_"Smith is down, and Gabe's injured," Dugan stated, breathing heavily. "I don't know how long we can hold them back."_

_Steve, who had been in countless battles now, had been hit hard by that. He had lost a man before, but hearing Dugan say that almost took his breath away. These Howling Commandos were very important to him and he couldn't bare anything happening to them. "Where are you?"_

_Again, there were a few seconds of silence before Dugan replied, "I know what you're thinkin', Cap, but you can't. We still had a mission to accomplish."_

_Anger rose up in Steve, as he dodged yet another blast from a hydra weapon. He couldn't understand how this mission could go so wrong so fast. They had planned everything down to the shoes they would be wearing. However, he had asked Phillips if they could bring more man, but he turned Steve down. This was all about being covert, and the more man they took the more they would stand out. A few people could sneak pass, not a whole army. "I understand. However, after I finish up here, I'm coming to assist you, Dugan. Is that understand?"_

_"Yes, Sir," came Dugan's response._

The soggy Steve, after what seemed like forever in the shower, turned off the water and just stood there as the water droplets dripped down his body. It wasn't long before the fog from the hot water dissipated, leaving him with a cold chill in the room. Still being wet, he started to freeze, but he didn't move. His mind was too focus on his memories to dry off or to even move. Ever since he 'woke' up, he was haunted by his memories of the past, and knowing that they were all gone hit him harder than anything else. And now, there were flashbacks of Toni and her in danger. He was struggling.

He pushed away from the wall and stared down at his waterlogged hands. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he stepped out of the shower and crossed to the towel, which looked rather plain compared to the rest of the bathroom, sitting on the counter. He couldn't even begin to explain how this bathroom looked like, but it did look like it came directly out of an expensive magazine.

After drying off and wrapping the towel around his waist, he stepped toward the mirror and stared at his reflection. Even with the shower, he looked like a puppy looking for a home, and he hated that. Why was he like this? Why was he so useless? All he could do is bust down doors, while everyone else did the important things. They were the one collecting information and using it to bring Toni back.

At that moment, he felt another flashback coming on.

_In Roger's anger, he was able to clear the area of Hydra soldiers while the rest of his team looked on in surprised. It wasn't like they thought he couldn't, but rather, it was something else to watch. Steve with his flexibility and strength was doing things inhumanly possible and no matter how often he did it, it always took people by surprise. Also, his skills were always improving._

_At his order, Folsworth, Morita and Huges (the additional soldier) retreated while Steve headed to Dugan's team. Not one of his men may have liked this plan, but they followed his order. Steve could make it to the other team faster on his own and he needed all the time that he could get. With each passing second, the chances of them living fell._

_It had taken a ten minutes for him to find the other team, and when he came upon the scene, he was take back. However, he wouldn't allow that to stop him; he had teammates to save. And after he saved them, he would go after Toni, as there was no way in hell that he would leave her behind._

_Spotting the dead body of Smith, Steve made a promise that he would bring his dog tags back to Smith's wife. She was a good woman and she deserved that much. Steve turned his attention to Dugan as he was providing cover fire for Dernier, who was hovering over a bleeding Jones. Dernier was saying something in French that only Jones could understand. A Hydra Soldier caught his attention as the enemy soldier made his way toward Dugan's blind side. Steve, not even a second later, dashed toward them, ready to strike, but he didn't get the chance._

_Out of nowhere, Bucky rolled out and fired at the solder killing him. His appearance startled everyone, including the bleeding Gabe who looked toward Bucky with a huge smile. Bucky crossed over to Smith feeling for a pulse, but Steve kept his eyes in the direction that Bucky came from waiting for Toni jump out after him; however, she never came. Anger rose up inside of Steve, as he wondered where she why and why the hell Bucky had left her. Steve glanced back to his closest friend, who held Smith's dog tags in his hand. Barnes was standing next to Dugan, saying something to him as he eyed Gabe._

_Seeing another enemy soldier heading toward them, Steve reacted and flung his shield at him. As always, his aim was prefect, killing the soldier on impact. The Commandos' heads jerk back toward him, just noticing he was there. Steve raised his hand to catch the shield as it flew back to him, and he made his way toward Dernier._

_"Are you guys alright?" he asked, not even looking at Barnes whose very sight pissed him off. He reached down to Gabe's wrist and felt for his pulse. "Your heart is beating too fast," he stated, though he wasn't sure how bad that was. He wasn't a doctor._

_"Not dead yet," Jones stated with a smile. "I can still fight."_

_Steve glanced down at Gabe's side, where Dernier was applying pressure to stop the bleeding. Though he couldn't be sure what had hit Gabe, it wasn't a shot from an advance Hydra weapon, which only needed to make contact with a person to kill him. "No. You're all going to retreat, while I hold them off."_

_"And what about you, Cap?" Dugan asked as he looked over his shoulder for any additional enemy soldiers. Seeing none, he turned back to Steve, who was helping Gabe to his feet._

_"Once you are clear, I'm going after Toni," Steve said, as he leaned Gabe against Dernier._

_Bucky with his back pressed against a large vehicle that had been providing cover fired as he spotted a few soldiers moving toward them. "There're too many of them."_

_Steve rotated quickly, putting himself behind Dernier and Gabe to block the fire. He held his shield up, block all attacks from hitting them. "I'll not leave a man behind," he stated. "Now go."_

_Dugan nodded as he moved quickly to Dernier and Gabe. Getting onto the other side of Gabe, he placed him on his shoulders. He was big enough to carry Gabe alone. "I got him. Let's go." He looked back to Jones on his shoulder. He was looking paler with each passing second. "Ready, Gabe?"_

_Jones left up his head slightly. "As I will ever be, Dum Dum," he replied._

_Steve watched Dernier, Jones, and Dugan as they hurried off. Seeing a few enemies heading toward him, he hurled his shield toward the soldiers. After the shield had left his hands, he upholstered his guns and took aim, firing at anyone that wasn't his team member. "Why are you still here, Bucky?" he asked, twisting around. He fired at the soldier who was coming around the vehicle._

_"I'm not leaving," he replied, eyeing the body falling next to him._

_"Leaving is what you're good at, right?" Steve, snapped, as he caught his shield. Not even a second later, he threw it again, and he darted toward the direction that Dugan, Dernier and Gabe went. There were a few soldiers go after them, and he had to stop them. He fired again, killing them. Not stopping to watch the bodies fall, he turned back to Barnes who had killed a few others on this own._

_Bucky lowered his weapons as Steve approached. "What is that supposed to mean?" Bucky asked._

_"Where's Toni?" Steve asked, as he made his way toward the direction that Bucky came from._

_Barnes followed behind him. "Steve, I had to."_

_"You abandoned the mission. Her safety was the most important," Steve countered. His anger started to boil through and he couldn't let that happen. He had a mission to focus on, and using that, he forced himself forward._

_Barnes followed closely behind Steve. "So that's what's going on."_

_They didn't have time for this, not now at least. "Not now," he replied. Besides, letting his anger out wouldn't solve anything and he was probably not thinking clearly. He didn't need to snap._

_"Steve-"_

_"Not now," Steve ordered._

_"Steve," Barnes continued._

_Steve turned and snapped, "What?"_

_Barnes pointed toward a female Hydra Commander, with long black hair, and two hydra soldier trailing behind her. They were heading somewhere, and by the look of it, it was somewhere very important. "What do you think?"_

_The Captain in him looked at the group with a calculated look, and he knew he should go after them as the commander looked to be somewhat important, but he didn't have time to deal with her. He had to find Toni before anyone else did. "We need to find, Toni."_

Steve closed his eyes as he pushed himself away from the mirror and stepped to the door with his fists balled at his side. Hindsight was really 20/20, because he was an idiot to let that woman through. He was too distracted by saving Toni to think about anything else. She was obviously an important figure within the Hydra organization, which he could tell by her uniform… He was just too clouded at the time to think clearly.

Shaking his head, he stepped out of the bathroom and crossed to the dresser to find some clothes. Not caring if anything matched, he selected a random gray t-shirt with some logo on it and a pair of black sweatpants. The shirt was slightly too small and the logo was stretched across his chest, while the sweatpants were loose, hanging at his waist. Most of the clothes in this rooms weren't his as it was Toni who had stocked the room with everything that she thought he would need if he were ever to stay. He had expected the clothes to be the wrong size since Toni didn't know his size, but it was never an issue before as he never expected to wear them. He never expected to be here this long.

He crawled into the bed, and without undoing the covers, he laid down, but he didn't close his eyes. Rather, he just stared off as he thought. He really wanted-no, needed to sleep, but it wouldn't come to him and he had no idea of how to get himself to sleep.

After a few seconds of staring off at the wall, he rotated onto his back and stared up at the off-white ceiling. Sleep didn't come even though he was dead tired, and he didn't know how to deal with that. Like with alcohol, pills didn't work as his system just worked them out. He supposed he could just count sheep, but he got distracted after he reached 100. The only he could do was closed his eyes and hope sleep would come to him.

However whenever he closed his eyes, the flashbacks came flooding.

_"Are you sure it's this way?"_

_"Yes."_

Steve squeezed his eyes shut, trying to get some sleep. He needed to sleep, damn it, or else he would go crazy. Everyone else already thought he was crazy though, which was why he was left behind while everyone else went out.

_"Steve, you are taking this out of portion."_

_Steve didn't respond as they made their way through the long hallways. Blood was spray across their uniforms as they had killed a few soldiers to make it this deep into the base. Though they didn't want to make a scene, it did give the rest of the team a chance to escape. It gave them an opening. "Not now, Bucky," he said, feeling his best friend's eyes on his back._

_"There is it," he said._

_He followed Barnes' glance toward a door halfway down the long hallway, and it made his heart skip a beat. The door had been kicked open, right off its hinges. Without another thought, Steve bolt toward the door not caring if Bucky could keep up with him or not. Right now, he had to get to Toni before she was injured if it wasn't already too late. For that, he didn't care if Bucky could keep up because he was too angry. This was all his fault. He left her._

_Steve made it to the doorway in no time and glanced around looking for Toni, who made his heart stop at seeing her. He had seen the two dead bodies in the room, wondering for a split second what had happened to them; however, he wasn't worried about them. He was worried about Toni, who wasn't moving. He didn't move as the woman he had saw from earlier was standing over her. She had an evil look in her eyes as she looked over Toni._

_"Get away from her," Steve ordered as he hurled his shield at her._

_The Female Commander dodged the shield with ease. "Oh, it's Captain America. I didn't think I would have this honor," she mocked as she picked up a blood knife from the ground. Though Steve couldn't be sure, it looked like Toni's knife._

_Not interesting in speaking with his woman, Steve reached for his gun, but he wasn't fast enough as she flung the knife at him. Without having his shield to block, he dropped to the ground and fired. She was faster than he thought and dodged. The bullet pinged again the metal control panel and ricochet, but unfortunately, it didn't hit the woman. Steve got back to his feet and collected his shield which had fallen a few feet from him. He rushed toward her, trying to drive her away from Toni._

_The commander flipped away, but she didn't move far. "Schmidt was correct about you. You have large eyes for her."_

_Steve growled, surprising even himself. "Who are you?" he asked, standing in front of the still Toni. This commander was something else. Not that he would ever underestimate a woman especially after knowing Peggy and Toni, he didn't expect this from the woman. She was different from the other hydra soldiers that he had met._

_"You-" She started but was interrupted by Barnes, who came dashing into the room._

_Barnes scanned the room, his eyes stopping on Toni who was almost hidden behind Steve. "Who are you?" he inquired, reaching for his gun. Though Bucky's voice didn't reveal anything, Steve knew he was shaken by what he saw._

_Her eyes flicked to Toni. "Who I am doesn't matter. I'm here for her, and we'll get her soon enough," she snapped, tossing a ball like item to the ground. Smoke exploded from the ball, filling the room._

_In an instant, Steve dropped to his knees and covered Toni with his body. He held Toni close, refusing to move as he was unsure if the commander would attempt to take Toni. As the smoke started to clear, they noticed that the woman was gone. Both Barnes and Rogers were confused as they weren't sure what was happening or who she was, but they both knew they had to move._

_Placing his shield onto his back, Steve carefully flipped Toni onto her back. "Toni," he called as he held her tight against his chest. Feeling her heart beat, he felt relief wash over him, but it didn't last long as she wasn't responding to him. "Toni," he called again. She felt almost cold to him and that scared him._

_"Steve," Barnes called, seeing the look on Steve's face._

_The Captain wasn't listening. He was too blinded by the blood on his hands. When he had put his hand under her head to support her, he had felt something cold and sticky. He pulled back his hand to see it covered in blood; there was a wound on the back of her head. "Toni. Please wake up," he begged, worried. This wasn't good. Heads wounds were never good._

_Without Steve knowing, Barnes was beside him and he could tell Bucky was just as shaky as he was. "Steve, is she…?" he asked, his voice giving his emotions away._

_Steve looked up and glimpsed at his friend. He had to pull himself together, because they still had a mission and they couldn't fail. If they did, this all would be in vein. "She's alive. Did she finish?" he asked, not looking at anything besides her face. He held her tight, refusing to let her go. Barnes left his side and went to the control panel. Steve wasn't paying any attention as he was trying to get Toni to open her eyes. He ran his fingers along her arms, calling her name._

_A few minutes later, Bucky returned to Steve's side. "Yes, she did." He held something in his hand. "Let's go." He paused. "I can get her if you like…"_

_"No, I have her," Steve said firmly, as he was getting to his feet. "Let's leave before any other hydra soldiers shows up." He looked down at Toni, frowning at the sight of her. He could see a red hand print around her neck and he wanted to snap the person who did that to her in half._

_"Steve."_

_"Let's go, Barnes." Steve ordered. He was too tired to fight and he was too angry to care about sparing Barnes' feelings._

Rogers popped up into a sitting position frustrated. How could he sleep when all he saw was pain? He didn't know how it was possible to sleep when his past life kept haunting him. It wasn't just about his memories of Toni; it was about Bucky, whose death still haunted him. It was about everything. He saw everything. He wasn't sure why he couldn't get rid of them.

He stepped out of the bed and headed toward the kitchen to find something to eat. If he couldn't sleep, he might as well eat to keep up his strength. Though he couldn't really cook anything besides eggs, he had to admit that the kitchen in the tower was impressive and it made him want to cook as he had never seen anything like it before.

As it was late, the tower was pretty quiet and empty beside a few security guards at the lower levels. Steve normally didn't mind the silence, but at the moment, it ate at him. With a deep breath, he started to hum as he tried to block out the silence. With the humming keeping his pace even, he made it to the kitchen in little time. Not feeling like cooking anything at the moment, he decided to make a sandwich, as it was something simple that he could do without much thought process. It was very hard to mess up a sandwich, though in his current state Steve just might; however, he was able to manage it.

"Hungry, I see," a voice said from the doorway.

Steve looked up from the counter. "Banner," he said, surprised. "How long have you been back?" He didn't know that Banner was in the tower.

"Not long," he said making his way over to Steve. "I think I might make me a sandwich as well." The meat, lettuce, bread, and tomatoes were still on the counter.

"Any change on that device?" Steve asked, leaning back against a counter with his sandwich in his hand.

Making a sandwich with everything on it, Bruce stared down at counter, not making eye contact except for tiny looks every few seconds. "If Toni is planning of using something from the Tesseract, maybe I can do the same. We would have a better shot of doing it, but I would need some help or access to the Tesseract, and I'm not sure I can get that. Trying to talk it through with Thor."

Steve took a deep breath. "That stupid cube." He hated that damn thing with every fiber of his being. It was the cause of everything that went horribly wrong.

"You look a little better," Bruce said, as he finished making his sandwich.

"I'm but still can't sleep," he replied, allowing Bruce to change the subject. However, he didn't like the idea of using the Tesseract. "And I'm stuck on the sidelines."

Bruce smiled, weakly. "You're never on the sidelines. Just taking a break like we all need to do."

"I guess."

"Besides, Toni won't like it if you worry yourself to death."

"Yea, she might lecture me for a change," Steve joked.

"And Toni's lectures are always funny, well if they aren't directed at you," Bruce said.

Steve laughed as he took a bit of his sandwich. "Ain't that the truth," he said.

"Let's finish these and check on Romanoff and the other," Bruce said, waving his sandwich at Steve.

Steve nodded as he wanted to know what was happening with that mission. Did they find the devices? Did they know who was behind it? Steve so hoped they did, because if they did, they would be one step closer in bringing back Toni, his anchor. He would be able to sleep again. He would be able to dream again, knowing she was safe with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I didn't make Future Steve seem too OOC, though I think if anyone went without sleep for a few days anyone would seem out of Character. It is like those Snickers commercials.   
> I think I should clarify something so no one is confused. The future isn't going as fast as the past is. So many months may have passed in the past, but in the present, it has only been a few weeks.
> 
> I hope that makes sense.


	22. Her Father's Daughter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't kill me! As you read this, just keep Captain America: Winter Soldier in your minds.

As Toni loved porches liking to lay out in the sun, they were required for everyplace she lived. Feeling the sun beat against her delicate skin and the wind gently blowing through her long dark wavy hair was the best feeling. She could lay out for hours (well with sun block and a nice cold drink). Sometimes she would sleep or read a magazine or book.

At the moment, she was sitting in a beach chair at her Malibu mansion reading an interesting article about herself. When she saw it on the racks at the store, she plucked it right up as she wondered what they were gossiping about her now. Some of the stories were quite funny and they could always lift her spirts if ever needed; however, even if she didn't, it was always a good laugh. Right now for example, she was very chirper and was reading it as she spotted a fascinating article in it. It was one of those 'how did they know that.'

Putting the magazine down, she reached for her cold beverage and took a slip. Her eye twitched as she tasted the lemonade, which seemed to be missing something. She took another slip and swirled it around in her mouth as to figure out what was missing. "Where's the alcohol?" she asked annoyed. She glared and whirled the glass, spilling some of the liquid on her. "J.A.R.V.I.S." she yelled, annoyed. She wanted alcohol, damn it. "Hello, J.A.R.V.I.S." She yelled again, when he didn't answer her. Why didn't that stupid AI answer her?

"Are you okay, Toni?"

Toni jumped as that voice didn't belong to J.A.R.V.I.S. Shifting her weight, she turned toward the French style glass doors leading into the house to see who it was, and to her shock, it was James Barnes. For a second, she wondered how the hell he was at her house, but that only lasted a second as her annoyance at the lack of alcohol was growing. "I want to know why there isn't any alcohol in my drink," she shouted, holding her glass toward Barnes. "Maybe, you could add some?" she asked, putting on a smile.

Barnes gave her a weird look, while adding, "Not in your condition."

"What do you mean my 'condition'?" she asked, confused as to what he was talking about. She didn't have a condition, well… besides the shrapnel in her body; however, that didn't affect her drinking ability.

"Toni," he mumbled in a laughing tone, as he turned and walked back into the house. "Sometimes…"

"What condition?" she asked, jumping to her feet to follow him. Was he playing with her?

Barnes was a good few feet in front of her and for some reason, she had trouble closing the distance between them. It was like her body didn't want to move and she tired too easily. What was wrong with her? Did something happen to her and she not know it? "Bucky!" she yelled, running into the house. "B-"

"She's being crazy today, Steve," Barnes stated as he stopped by the water feature in the living room.

Toni looked pass Barnes to Rogers, who had walked through the front door, and her eyes twitched as J.A.R.V.I.S. scanned him like it did everyone, who entered. "I see you're working now, J.A.R.V.I.S." she muttered.

"What's she doing now, Bucky?" Steve asked, giving her a look, as he disarmed himself.

"Trying to drink…though she could be messing with me," Barnes said, teasing. A bright smile was present on his face.

After sitting his shield down gently, Steve took a few steps toward her while giving her a narrowing look. "Toni, you know you can't drink in your condition," he stated.

"What condition?!" Ton snapped, tired of this game.

Both of them looked at her, as if they couldn't believe she was playing this game; however, it was Steve who spoke, "You're pregnant, Toni."

At first, Toni wasn't sure he was speaking English, because that didn't make any sense. But once it clicked in her head, she was in complete shock. That couldn't have been true. She couldn't be pregnant, not with all the precautions she took. "Am not," she protested. What the hell was going on?

"Look down, Crazy Lady," Barnes mocked as he pointed down, earning a glare from Steve.

Toni narrowed her eyes as she looked down at her huge, round belly in complete shock. She was indeed pregnant, and by the looks of it, she was seven or eight months. No wonder she couldn't keep up with Barnes as all she could do was waddle. How the hell did that happen? Who did she have to kill? She glanced back up, glaring at them. "Smartass," she muttered, looking between the two.

"The pot call the kettle black," Barnes teased, walking back to her.

"Yea right. You're more a delinquent then I am," Toni countered as she stuck her tongue out. She was being childish she knew, but it was not hard not to be when dealing with Barnes. "And if I have to have a parasite going inside of me, I expected to be waited on hand and foot. Now hop to it, Barniez Boy!"

Barnes gave her a look. "Hop? What do I look like a rabbit? I-"

"Enough," Steve ordered as he motioned to the sofa. He gave a warning look to Barnes before looking at Toni. "You shouldn't be up."

"I don't like to sit," Toni countered.

"We know this," Barnes said, sounding exhausted, as he crossed to her, offering to help her to sofa. There was a bit of hesitation when he offered his arm, but she let him help her without a protest. "We know this all too well. Right, Steve?" There was a hint of amusement when he spoke.

"Oh, I know," Steve agreed as he magically got her a glass of water from somewhere and crossed to the sofa.

Toni stared at the mysteriously glass before glaring at the two of them. "I don't like to be handed things." There was a brief second of wonder as to how she got here with these two and why they were doting on her.

"Toni," Steve said, a soft warning. He held the glass out to her. "Just take it."

She really hated to be handled things, but Steve wouldn't listen. She glared at the glass before grabbing it out of his hands. "Thanks," she muttered, annoyed. As their fingers touched, she felt her heart skip and her annoyance die.

Steve smiled as he took a seat next to her with a hand on her knee. "You worry me when you're like this," he said, his voice soft.

There was something about his voice that smoothed her, and she leaned in closer to him, laying against him. "Don't lie. I always worry you," she corrected. She loved the way he smelled.

Steve laughed. "Very true."

On the other side, Barnes leaned closer and placed his hand on Toni's knee and squeezed. His other arm rested behind her at the base of her neck, playing with her hair. "She needs to rest," he said, eyeing her. Her eyes were closed, feeling completely comfortable with the both of them.

"No, she needs to pick," Rogers said, pulling Toni closer to him.

"Pick what?" She asked, bolting up and out of Rogers' grip. She stared at the two of them, confused.

Leaning toward her, Barnes squeezed her knee. "Pick one of us."

Toni's heart raced as she looked between the two, not sure what was going on. "What?"

"Who do you want?" Steve asked, reaching her.

Her heart was racing and she wondered for a second of she was going to have a heart attack. "Want?" But the thought of choosing scared her.

"Yes, who do you want?" Bucky asked, as his hand travel to her extruding stomach.

It came at her all at once and she couldn't think without getting an extreme headache. There also seemed to be a raise in temperature, making Toni sweat. To make matters worse, she wasn't able to catch her breaths no matter how hard she tried. It felt like there was something or someone sitting on her chest, not allowing her to. With everything adding on, Toni's head felt like it was in a fog and she wasn't able to think clearly. However, there was one thing that she could make out: she was scared.

"You have to pick." Steve stated leaning down to look into her eyes.

"No," Toni said as she tried to push them away.

"You have to," Barnes replied.

"No," she snapped. Why were they pushing her? Why was it so important that she picked? Why couldn't she have both? Did she really want both? She wasn't sure. She really wasn't sure, but all she knew was that she wanted to get away, far away, as she didn't want to answer them. "Just shut up!"

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

With the wires and IVs connected to her, Toni bolted straight up covered in a cold sweat. Not paying attention to anything round her, she hunched forward and fisted the sheets like she was in physical pain. "It was just a dream," she whispered, breathing heavily. Her throat was killing her. "Just a dream." She had no idea why that dream hit her harder than her nightmares did. In her nightmares, she was fighting for her life, while in that dream she just had to pick. She wasn't sure why she had to. It wasn't as if she wanted either Steve or Bucky, because she didn't…

After pushing her sore self up, she pushed the covers off and lifted up her shirt to expose her belly. "Good," she uttered, seeing her flat stomach. With an aching dry throat, she spoke. "It felt so real." After she was sure that she wasn't pregnant, she lowered her shirt. Though she hadn't put much thought into it, she didn't want children; they scared the shit out of her. They were the scariest things on the planet, even above Loki. Heck, she had no idea of how to take care of the little beasts, and she would probably kill one if she had to care for a child.

Shaking that out of mind, she turned her attention to the small room. _Where am I_? She asked herself, looking around. She appeared to be in a hospital connected to many different tubes and wires, but she couldn't remember how she got there. The last thing she remembered was… Nothing. Shaking her head, Toni closed her eyes as she tried to remember, but it was all fuzzy.

Her hand went to her head, feeling a huge bandage on the lower back of her head. _I must've hurt my head,_ she thought. That had to be why she couldn't remember! She opened her eyes and glanced down at her faded reactor which was exposed to the world to see. Why was her shirt open? What happened?

Toni eyed the IVs in her arm as she quickly buttoned up her shirt to cover the reactor, though it didn't block the glow. She had an urge to pull out all of the IVs, but she didn't want a lecture which she would get. There was some kind of fluids running through the clear tubing and it had to be important.

"Good choice, but you don't need to button up for me. I would prefer it unbuttoned."

Toni jumped at the voice, not realizing that anyone was in the room with her. Turning toward the voice, she felt herself groan at the sight of Loki sitting in a chair reading what she presumed was her medical chart. "What are you doing here, Loki?" she asked, laying back down in the bed as she unconsciously covered her chest with her arm. Her body was sore, and just sitting up took all of her energy.

"I came to see my favorite-"

"Cut the bull," Toni snapped, interrupting him. She glared at him before staring at the ceiling. "I am _so_ not your favorite person."

Loki, still wearing the same ratty thing as before, stood and stepped to the bed. "I was going to say favorite toy." His fingers traced the edge of the bed.

She raised an eyebrow. "If I could hit you, I would." Toni could feel the exhaustion flow through her; it was like she hadn't slept for days, and then there was her stomach, which felt like she hadn't eaten in months. "What do you want? My throats hurts too much for this game you play."

"Feeding tube."

"What?" she asked, confused.

"Your throat hurts because they just took a feeding tube out. You have been out for a few days," Loki explained.

She gasped at him, genuinely shock. "…How would you know? Been watching me, pervert?" she asked.

"I like to make sure my favorite toy is alive and well since her rabbit is gone."

"What do you mean? What rabbit?" Toni pushed herself up and glared at him, but he didn't say anything. "What do you want?" she asked, her voice cracking. Her throat was dry, aching with every word that she was saying.

"I want to see if you will to take my deal. You know before the Red Skull gets you, though I doubt he understands how much trouble you will be," he stated, stepping even closer to her. His fingers inched closer to her.

With pain rushing through her mind, what that female commander had said came flooding back. Skully wanted her for something, which was alarming. Why would he want her? Did he know something? "No," she replied, still wondering what he meant by her rabbit was gone.

Loki inched closer to her. "You say that now."

"I will always say that," she countered, irritated. Her head ached as more memories flashed before her eyes, but she wouldn't let it get to her as she had to deal with Loki, who was up to something. How did he know that Skully was after her? Was he up to something, using Skully to do it? She glared at him as he entered her personal bubble. "Now what?" she asked, noticing his eyes on her.

"What was that dream of yours about, Lady Toni?" he asked.

Did he just call her Lady Toni? Not only was Thor the only person who was allowed to call her that, she hated to be called Lady anything. Sure, she was a woman, but she was not a lady in any fashion. She was too ill-behaved and loud. "Why do you care?" she asked. She was unsure of what her dream was about or what it meant. Why would she dream about being pregnant?

"Just say yes and I will tell you."

"G-go away," Toni hissed. She couldn't deal with him when she had an aching head. No, she couldn't deal with him at all.

"But I do-"

Loki didn't finish as the door to the room suddenly opened, silencing him. Toni glanced at the familiar looking nurse entering into the room before turning back to Loki, worried that the nurse saw him; however, she was alone in the room. She didn't know how he did it, but he was gone as if he was never there in the first place. Though he annoyed her to no end and was a massive murderer, she didn't want him to go as he was a connection to the future. Also, he was up to something and she wanted to figure out what.

"You're awake," the nurse said, clearly shocked.

Toni stared at the nurse trying to remember where she met her from, but she couldn't place it. "I don't need any more beauty sleep," she teased, her throat killing her. Eyeing a glass of water on the dresser, she reached for it, but her hand shook. Feeling embarrassed, she retracted it. _What's wrong with me?_ Though her fear of water wasn't as bad, it still seemed to haunt her.

"Here." The nurse stated, trying to hand Toni the glass.

Toni had no idea of how the nurse got to her side so fast, and it startled her. "I don't like to be handed things." She wanted the water, but it went against her core to be handled something.

The Nurse gave her an aggravated look, still holding the glass out to her. "You have to take it easy. Now, take the glass." When Toni didn't, the nurse sighed as she put a moveable tray table in front of her and set the glass on it. "There. See? Not handing it to you," she said, exasperated look on her face.

Toni took the glass with shaky hands and took a drink. "Thanks," she muttered at taking a few slips. "What happened?" she asked, her voice barely audible.

"You shouldn't speak. We just took the feeding tube out," the nurse responded as she took the glass from Toni and made her lay back down.

There was something about the woman that Toni didn't like, but she couldn't figure it out. However, what she did know was that she didn't like be forced to do anything. "What happened?" she asked again.

"You went into cardiac arrest and flat-lined. You need to relax."

Cardiac arrest? Flat-lined? She died? "What?!" Toni didn't remember any of that.

"You were dead for a few seconds before the doctor brought you back. You need to rest," the nurse said, her tone cold. She held Toni's shoulder to keep her down, and Toni was too tired to fight.

Toni didn't remember that; she couldn't really remember anything. What was going on? "I need to see, Salty," she muttered, giving up the fight against the woman.

"Phillips? He said you would call him by that stupid nickname. I'll tell him you are up. Just relax," the nurse ordered, getting impatient with her.

Toni wanted to say something snappy, but she thought better of it. The nurse, who looked stupid in her uniform, was correct: she needed to rest. "Okay."

"Good," the nurse said as she turned to leave.

Though her angle made it difficult, Toni watched as the nurse left, and for a few seconds, Toni watched the door as if she expected someone to walk in. When no one did, she felt her heart flop, though she had no idea of why. It wasn't as if she liked the nurse or needed someone at her bed side… No, rather, she wanted someone at her bedside. A certain someone at her bedside. _Grow a pair, Stark,_ she told herself. She was being childish and she hated it.

* * *

 

_*O*O*_

* * *

 

Toni didn't know when she fell asleep, but she did, and she had no idea for how long. She would've probably remained asleep if it wasn't for the death grip on her hand, and it really was death grip as she wondered if she could have a hand afterward. She could tell a lot by the grip and it touched her heart as the man seemed to care. Without opening her eyes, she tried to pull her hand back, but she couldn't break his grip. Instead of letting go, he squeezed tighter.

She heard her name escaped from his lips, but she didn't open her eyes right away. Instead, she focused on his voice, as it called to her like no other voice had. She wasn't quite sure what to make of it, but she wanted to hear his voice again, and she was rewarded a few seconds later as he said her name again.

"Toni."

Forcing her eyes open, she found herself staring at Rogers and she was completely shocked by his appearance. There had to be something wrong, very wrong. "Steve," she uttered, her voice cracking, as the hold on her hand didn't die.

"Toni." Seeing his face and hearing his voice, she knew something was extremely wrong. It was like he was crying, but not crying at the same time. "You're awake." He looked defeated.

She didn't like seeing him like that. "Steve," she called again as she tried to sit up, but he wouldn't let her.

"You need to rest," he said, using his free hand to keep her down. His voice was trembling.

"Don't give me that shit. What's wrong?" she asked pushing his hand off her shoulder, and using his arm as an anchor. Seeing the scared, depressed look on his face, she kept a grip on his arm and she squeezed.

Rogers didn't answer her right away as he stared at her like she was going to disappear any second. "You're awake. That's all that matters." He squeezed her hand harder. His other hand dropped to the upper part of her left arm and his thumb spiraled gently on her skin.

Toni felt her heart flip as she listened to his voice. There was something in his tone that sounded like he was broken, like he was in extreme pain. She wanted to reach out and hug him, but there was something in his eyes that stopped her. "Steve," she uttered as it was all she could say. Her own voice was breaking.

He leaned closer to her as he sat on the edge of his seat. "You're awake. I never thought I would see your beautiful eyes again." His hand left Toni's upper arm and traveled to her face where he cupped her face. "So glad." His thumb started to spiral again, gently rubbing her cheek.

It made Toni blush and that wasn't easy as she wasn't _exactly_ innocent. Even though his touches were innocent, there was something intimate about the way that he touched her. It was a loving touch. _Would future Steve touch me like this?_ She asked herself as she leaned closer to him, into his touch. She didn't know what this meant, but she wanted something close to this.

"Toni… Please… Don't leave me."

That statement surprised her. Toni looked into his eyes, trying to figure out what was going on in his head. "What happened?" she asked. If he was able to get drunk, she would've thought he was drunk.

"Don't leave me. Just don't leave me."

"I won't," she responded, fighting the urge to pull him closer. "I won't. I mean it." She had never seen him like this. Even before the serum, she didn't think he had this in him; she didn't think he was capable of breaking down like this. It broken her to hear him like this.

Steve shifted closer to Toni as his hand dropped to her neck, keeping her from moving back. "I need you."

With a pang of pain, a memory flashed before her eyes of Barnes kissing her, telling her that he wanted her. His tone then had been close to Steve's tone now, but there was something desperate in Steve's voice. "What are you saying?"

He closed the distance even more, moving within inches from her. It was kissing distance, but he didn't say or do anything besides looking into her eyes.

"Steve."

"I l-love hearing you say my name," he said, stumbling over the word love.

Toni looked at him, trying to figure him out. "If you don't tell me what's going on, I'm going to call you Rogers again. Now, tell me!" Though something was up, she was getting annoyed; she tried to move out of his grip, but he wouldn't let her go. Before another word was said, Steve closed the distance and kissed her, kissed her hard. Unlike with the kiss with Barnes, there wasn't much thought even with the shock of Steve kissing her. She couldn't reject him when he was like this, not that she wanted too. There was something about his kiss. It pulled her in.

After a long kiss, he pulled away, but he didn't move far; instead, he rested his forehead against hers. "Don't leave. I need you," he said after a few seconds. He kissed her again, and with this kiss, he wanted to explore.

As she allowed him to deepen the kiss, her mind wandered to Barnes and stayed on him. It wasn't by choice, but there was something in the back of her head that wouldn't allow her to forget him. Something was wrong. He told her after their kiss that he would come back _for_ her. Where was he? Breathing heavily, she pulled away and glanced up at Steve, who looked –for lack of a better word- hungry. "Where's Bucky?"

She could see something snap in him as he recoiled. He didn't answer and just looked away.

"Steve," she asked, touching her own lips, which felt funny. Did he really just kiss her? They fought nonstop about everything. Though he wasn't as much as an asshole as he was in the future, he was still that man, who told her what to do. Clint would have a field day if he found out how much she enjoyed it. "Where's Barnes?"

He let go of her and turned away. "Gone."

"Gone?" she asked, pushing her sore body closer to him.

"He's dead."

Something in her head snapped as it felt like the world had crashed down on her. Barnes was dead? She knew he was going to die, but it was different to experience it. To know that he was dead was a blow to the heart that Toni didn't expect. She thought she had prepared herself for this, but she was wrong. "Steve," she said as she watched him hunched over like he was in pain.

"He's gone." He looked down at his hands, which were balled. "I couldn't protect him like I couldn't protect you…" He glanced at her before looking back at his hands. "I failed… again. I thought I lost you too."

Kicking off the blankets, she leaned forward, almost on her hands and knees. The wires and IV strained as she reached for him. "Don't go there."

He turned back for her, inches from her. "I'm a horrible friend," he said as he stared at her. His eyes were drilling into her. "It's my fault."

"Don't do this," she yelled. She didn't want him to do this to himself as he was anything but a horrible friend. She on the other hand was a different story. She was _the_ terrible friend. "Don't… Don't go there. If you do, I will hurt you."

Steve frowned. "It's the truth. Looked at what just happened between us. It shouldn't have happened."

Toni knew to what he was referring to: the kiss, but she wasn't sure why. Did he not like her? It didn't matter right now, because she could see how broken he was. "Come here," she said, reaching toward him. "If anyone is a shitty friend, it's me. Not you." She thought back to the kiss with Barnes, and it almost killed her. How could she just kiss Rogers after she had kissed Barnes?

He looked at her, before leaning toward her and taking her into his arms. "You're anything but shitty."

She buried herself in his arms, in his dirty uniform that he hadn't changed out of, and wrapped her arms tightly around his chest. As he wrapped her his arms around her and held her, she nestled her head under his chin at his shoulder. Toni closed her eyes as she tried to hold back her tears. He didn't know the truth, which was why he could say that. He didn't know that she knew, that she could've saved Barnes if she just told them the truth… She knew she couldn't have, but it didn't help her guilt or her broken heart, which shocked her. "I'm completely shitty." Her throat still ached.

Steve's arms tightened around her. "No, you aren't," he said as he placed a kiss to the top of her head. "Not even close." He rested his head on hers.

"You-" she started, thinking about everything she had done. With Barnes' death, she had even more blood on her already stained hands. There was more death on her hands than anyone else's and that included the soldier holding her. She had done some things; she had been selfish.

"No, you aren't," he said firmly as he lifted his head to look at her, but she didn't meet his glance. "Look at me."

"No," she said.

Freeing one of his arms, he placed a finger under her chin and tilted her face up so he could look into her eyes. "You are so much more. So much more."

She glared at him. "I thought we were talking about you and the loss of your best friend. Not me." She closed her eyes as she hid her face in his chest. She didn't want to talk about herself, or how deeply she cared for Barnes. She didn't want to admit that she cared that much for him, when she had no idea of how he had gotten that close to her. "I'm sorry, Steve. I'm so sorry." Tears ran down her face.

He closed his eyes and held her even tighter, and he didn't move for quite some time. "Toni," he called, after a few minutes. "It's okay…" He paused. "Just don't leave."

He was breaking her and he didn't know it. She had promised not to leave him, even though she had to. She had to promise as she could see how broken he was and she didn't want to break him even more by say no. "Steve."

"I need you."

There was a part of her that wondered if this was because he was lost. Lost without Barnes, who had been everything for Steve. He was his best friend, his roommate, his brother. That loss must've hurt Rogers to his very core, and that had to be why he was acting like this. He was looking for something that Toni wasn't sure she could give as she was damaged as well. She may be damaged far worse than he, but he had been there through her nightmares. He was there when she needed someone, and she would try to be there for him, even if she was the worst person for it. "You have me. I…promise." Her voice almost broke.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Again, Toni didn't know when she had fallen asleep but she awoke to the sweet aroma of food. She forced her eyes open to find that delicious food as she was going to steal it. To her luck, it was on a food tray directly in front of her, and it was mouthwatering. She hadn't had a good meal in a while; heck, she couldn't even remember the last time she had a meal like that.

Being at war, they didn't have the fortune of four star meals, and at the apartment, they couldn't really afford anything like that. The plate in front of her had a nice sized steak, mashed potatoes, and some green beans, and she couldn't take her eyes off the steak, almost reaching to the fork just to taste it. "Is this a joke?" she asked.

Phillips was sitting in a chair by her bed side. "Dr. Zola didn't want it. I was tempted to eat it myself but I figured I would be nice and give it to you."

"You nice? I have seen everything now."

"Don't let it get to you head," he said as he moved the tray closer to her. "It won't happen again."

Toni pushed herself up so she could eat, which she munched down in record time. It tasted so good that she had a hard time slowing down, though she knew she should. It wasn't healthy to eat this fast, but she was hungry.

Eyeing her plate, he was amazed the food wasn't everywhere. "Did no one teach you manners?" Salty asked. His face changed suddenly as if he just remembered something from their earlier conversation. "I'm s-"

"Manners? Who needs manners?" she asked cutting him off, as she pushed the plate away. The plate had been licked cleaned, no really licked clean. Toni didn't normally lick plates but the look on Salty's face was priceless and she would do it again just to see it. He stared at her, rubbing his forehead in disbelief. "All gone."

"You're disgusting, you know that?" he said, looking at her as she wiped her mouth with a napkin.

"I try." Phillips shook his head, but he didn't say thing. "So where's Rogers?" She didn't remember much before passing out in his arms as she cried. It had been the first time that she had completely fell apart in front of him both in the future and past, though he had seen a few tears from her before. But it had been completely different now. She had broken down in his arms and she found it hard to believe that he would leave.

"I kicked him out."

Toni looked up startled for a second before glaring at Salty. "Why?"

"Do you really think it's wise?" he asked, looking at her all knowingly.

"What are you talking about?"

He took a breath before he stood. "You're too close."

"Too close to what?" Toni hated when people didn't get to the point and side stepped. Why couldn't he just say what he was thinking?

Salty looked very uncomfortable when he stepped back to her. "You need to distant yourself from Rogers."

That sentence irritated Toni. After that promise she had made, she couldn't leave him unless to go home as he was broken like her. Even without the promise, she didn't want to leave him. If he was anything like her, he was broken over the loss of Bucky.

With her, Bucky had been that friend, who made her laugh and supported her through everything. Even if she didn't want Barnes there, he was there at her side, and now he wasn't. In his place was some pain that Toni had never felt before. She had lost people, but this loss struck her hard and she didn't know how to deal. Coulson's death was different. She could handle that. "Why?" she asked, trying to hold back her anger.

Phillips took a deep breath. "I didn't think I need to say this, but it isn't fair to him. You don't belong here…" He paused. "He belongs with… Agent Carter."

That hurt like a bullet to the heart, but Salty was right. She didn't belong here; she needed to go back to her time. Maybe, she should listen to the Murderer. _Stupid Loki,_ she thought, thinking back to him. He was an asshole who was up to something, and she was going to find out what. "You forget I'm from the future. I know."

"…You knew, didn't you?" he asked. His voice was soft.

Toni looked at him expecting some kind of anger, but there wasn't any. "Yes," she said, closing her eyes as she couldn't take looking at the Colonel. After a few seconds of silence, she added, "Going to yell at me? Calling me heartless? Can't be any worse than what I call myself. I'm a heartless bitch, I know."

"I don't know about the heartless part." He paused. "…Or the bitch part."

She opened her eyes and stared at him. There still wasn't any anger in his eyes, and she didn't know how to deal with that. Why wasn't he mad at her? "You don't understand. I could've stopped it. I could've stopped it all and Barnes could still be alive." She said. Her attention wandered to IVs in her hands and the urge to pull them out so she could bolt grew.

"You did what you had to do. Don't let your guilt overwhelm you."

Toni looked at him before she turned her attention back to the IV and suddenly torn one out.

Seeing this, Salty jumped and reached for Toni, trying to stop her. "Stop, Toni," he ordered.

She almost fell out of bed, dodging Salty's hand, but she kept pulling at the IVs as she had to get out of here. However, she wasn't fast enough for Phillips, who raced to the other side of the bed. "Leave me alone."

"Stark, Stop."

Blood dripped down her arm as she pulled the IV. The skin on her chest stung as she yanked the heart monitors off. The machine peeped a few times, but she was able to yank the plug out before it went off. "I need to go."

"No, you don't," he said, standing in front of her. He reached for her again, to pull her back into the bed, but she pushed his arms away. "Relax."

"Don't tell me how to feel or what to do. I'm done with this game." She didn't want to be here anymore. She wanted to go and disappear. This guilty was burying her and she had no idea of how to handle it. Then there was a feeling of shame, because she didn't have the right to feel anything as it was her fault.

"I can't let you do that." He grabbed her shoulder to stop her. "Rogers told me that Hydra wants you, and we can't risk them getting you."

She looked at him. "I don't care! Maybe, it would be best if they did," she yelled, pushing him away. She didn't care about anything, she didn't care about her stalker, and she didn't care if she was danger. She just needed to get away. "Let me go."

"You aren't thinking clearly."

Toni glared at him as she shoved him hard, and in his shock, she was able to dash by him. "I'm fine," she yelled as she ran out of the room. To her luck, she wasn't wearing a hospital grown, but she wasn't wearing any shoes. However, she wasn't going to let that stop her. She needed to get out of here, and Salty calling her name wasn't going to stop.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Her feet, even with her socks acting like a barrier, were killing her as there was nothing to protect her feet from the hard ground. To make matters worse, it was freezing outside, and with no coat or shoes, the cold was affecting her faster than normal. She was losing her body heat quickly. She was shivering, but she had no interest in going inside.

Her guilt and sadness over Bucky's death was getting to her more than she ever thought possible. How could she get over this when she could've stopped it? She knew he was going to die, and she let it happen… Then there was also the fact that she cared for Bucky, and now he was gone. She was never good at saying good-bye.

Toni was on a military base somewhere in the middle of some country, and she had no idea where, not that she really cared. All she wanted was to go home where she wouldn't be feeling this way. She had gone through her whole life without feeling like this, and she hated that she was feeling it now. It was more than just losing a friend. Losing Bucky was something more than just… just like whatever she had felt with Rogers. Each of those kisses were something more than a kiss, and she knew it, but she didn't want to know that.

Shaking her head, she turned toward the center of the base and stared at the brick buildings. Her mind was all over the place and it kept firing and wandering. It jumped from shame to utter sadness that almost took her over, and she didn't know how to handle that. Her mind also went to Loki and his plan as it was a way to distract her from the pain.

Looking around, Toni had no idea where to go on this maze of a base that had too many buildings. Heck, she couldn't even tell which building she came from, though it could be because night had fallen and it was hard to see. Without knowing where to go, she headed toward a light post as it was the first thing that grabbed her attention.

It was a mindless walk as all she could think about was Barnes' death. How he died? Did he die protecting someone? Did he feel anything? Was it a quick death? Did he suffer? Did he have regrets? Did anything pass through his mind as he knew his death was near? Though it was completely selfish, she wondered if he thought of her like she was thinking of him.

Out of mental exhaustion, she fell to her hands and knees, resting her head against her cold, shaky hands. As she knew that Barnes was going to die, she didn't think his death would destroy her like this. And how could she move pass this when she was the reason he was dead? She could've warned him. She could've done something.

Plus, how could she have comfort Steve when she was the reason why he was hurting? She felt sick to her stomach thinking about it, and she felt her stomach flop. Feeling ill, she jumped to her feet and ran toward the nearest tree. Within seconds, she puked the meal that she had eaten hours ago, and when she pulled away, she felt it come up again.

Wiping her mouth on her sleeve, she made her way toward the light, but the feeling in her stomach didn't go away. It stayed there, haunting her, almost to the point that she wanted to puke again. Shaking her head, she tried to force out the negative thoughts, because all those thoughts did was put her in a very dark place, a dark place she never wanted to go to again.

She glanced down at her cold, frozen feet before she glanced up at the light which was taunting her. It flicked, remaining dark a second later than it was light. "Maybe, I should've stayed in bed," she muttered. Her body was sore and her throat still ached. "Too weak to leave…" She glanced down at her shaky hands. "Too dangerous as well." There seemed to be a line of people after her.

Out of habit, Toni took a look around, looking for her stalker. It made sense that her stalker was working with Hydra, but something was still off. How could Hydra know anything about her? There could be a mole inside of Salty's operation, but that didn't make sense either. If there was, Hydra wouldn't need a mission to get her as they could get her while she was alone. That Commander was also shocked to see her there, and if there was a spy, they would've known that.

She took a deep breath as she arrived at the light and rested her head against the post. The poll was cold to the touch, almost freezing her fingers to it, but she didn't pull away. It wasn't as if she wasn't already freezing. Her thoughts were too negative for her to care about the cold.

"Steve."

"I just need to be left alone, Peggy."

That pulled Toni from her thoughts, as it almost brought her to the point of tears. She was the reason why he was in so much pain. Toni pushed off from the poll and turned toward the direction of Peggy and Steve, which the sight of made her feel sicker. Why was Peggy hanging all over Steve like that? Didn't she know that he didn't need that?

"Steve, it isn't your fault," Peggy said, her accent heavy. He turned to her and before he could respond, she reached up onto her tiptoes and kissed him. At first, it looked like he was going to push Peggy away, but instead, he pulled her in and kissed her back.

At first, Toni just watched in disbelief as this was what she had been trying to do; she wanted them together but after that kiss Rogers and her shared, it was a blow to the heart, a heart that was already broken. Was why he kissing her back like that? Did their kiss earlier mean nothing? It took Toni less than two seconds to remind herself that it didn't. He just kissed her because he was hurt and he just needed comfort like she did. Nothing else. Why did she care? She didn't want anything else with him as she didn't do relationships. _I should've listened to Salty,_ she thought.

Turning away from the two love doves, she felt the wind get knocked out of her. She didn't know why she expected anything different, but heck, why did it even matter? It wasn't like there was a chance for the two of them. Did she forget about the future asshole Rogers, who wouldn't let her do anything? All she needed to do was to look the future and see it wouldn't work. Maybe, this was a good thing; she could spare herself the pain.

Toni closed her eyes, trying to catch her breath, but there were so many things in her head that she couldn't, and it was driving her closer and closer to a panic attack, which angered her. She hated those panic attacks of hers, which seemed to have gotten better… or so she thought.

After a few deep breaths, she was able to settle her mind and get her breath back, but when she looked up and saw Rogers and Carter together, she almost lost it again. There they were still locked in each other's arms, staring at each other with an intimate disgusting look that it made her want to throw something. Why in the hell were they kissing?

Before she could turn away, Rogers pulled away from Carter and turned, which to her bad luck, put her right in the sight of Rogers, who was looking at her with those eyes again. "T-Toni…" He stared at her, unsure what to say. He knew he had been caught. "Why are you out of bed?" he finally asked.

"And where are your shoes?" Carter asked, stepping toward her. She had a look of pity in her eyes that Toni didn't like.

Toni looked between the two, glaring. "I don't like shoes. Can't feel my toes," she replied, wiggling her cold toes. She glanced down at her filthy sockets, which were forming holes.

With a sigh, Peggy stepped toward. "Let's me get you back to bed," she said, reaching toward Toni. "You shouldn't be out of bed."

Toni was not in the mood to be babied, especially not from these two. Barnes had just died and they were making out. _Weren't you making out with Rogers too?_ She shook her head. That was different. She wasn't sure how it was different, but it was different. "You two seem too busy making out. I can make it back on my own."

"Toni." Peggy called again. She seemed unfazed by Toni's taunts. "You aren't thinking clearly. You need to rest."

"You wouldn't understand, since you disliked Barnes," Toni snapped. "You should care about getting the bad guy. You know Schmidt! Not getting lucky. Stop using this situation for your own benefit!"

Sassy Pants stepped back as if she had been shot and just stared wide eye at Toni unsure of what to say.

"Toni," Rogers scorned. "That's was uncalled for."

There it was. That stupid voice that he always had whenever he gave her orders; it was the same voice that he had in the future, where she wanted to kill him. It was probably a blessing that he was interested in Sassy Pants and not her, because she didn't want to be responsible for killing Captain America, which she would do if they were together. "Uncalled? Everything I say is uncalled for! It's my middle name," she yelled. "Which is why I don't have or _need_ friends."

"Toni," he uttered, shock was present on his face.

There it was again, his crushed face, and it crushed her. She had hurt him with that line and she felt like garbage. Why did she always have to hurt people? Why did she make a sport of it? She knew why. She was hurting and when she was hurting, she lashed out. It was what she did. It was what she would always do, because she was her father's daughter, and she hated that. "I better go before I say something I'll regret."

Peggy took a step back to her. "Toni. You need to be resting. You just got out of the hospital." There was a pause. "And you shouldn't be alone."

Toni narrowed her eyes knowing what she was talking about, but she didn't need anyone's protection. "Just leave me alone, Carter, and wherever you go, take Rogers with you." Both look taken back by the use of their last name, but Toni couldn't bring herself to care. However, Rogers' look cut her deep. She looked at him before she took off, ignoring her tired, cold body. She couldn't be here anymore.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Somehow, someway, Toni found her way to the lab, which was just pure dumb luck. It was a random choice that Toni made based on the windows, which were covered. With a sore body and feet, she rushed over to the building and pushed through the doorway. To her joy, she guessed right.

Lab equipment could always bring a smile to her face, and even if her damn device never worked, it could also put a smile on her face. There was something about technology that could brighten up her day, even when her emotions were all over the place. The ability to create something was something truly amazing and it was mind blowing to know that she had created something.

She only made it half way, before she sunk to her knees as her legs couldn't carry her anymore. She couldn't even feel her feet or fingertips anymore. Even with the warmth of the lab, she was still freezing and she couldn't stop the shivers no matter what she tried.

Shaking her head, she crawled to the table that her device set on and sat at the base of the table curled up in a ball. With tears forming, she closed her eyes, and without warning, sleep was on top of her. A dream was close behind, and all she could do was hope it was a good one.

_The warm sand felt good under her bare feet and the wind trickled her delicate skin as the sun shone brightly above. There wasn't a cloud in the clear blue sky, signaling how prefect the day was. The sounds of crashing waves, playing children, and a loud valley ball game could be heard off in the distance._

_Toni smiled, hearing the laugher. Though she would deny it, she enjoyed listening to the laugher as it was a signal that something went right in this messed up world. Running her hand through her curly, black, expresso hair, she turned her attention back to the ocean and the beating sun above. "Too hot," she smiled, the sun on her lips. Getting to her feet, she decided to jump into the ocean to cool down._

_It was a long walk from her beach towel to the water, and the sand burned her feet with each step. The wind battered her delicate skin, which started to turn red from the hot sun. Her two piece red polka dots bathing suit didn't provide her any protection. She had put sunblock on, but that was a few hours ago, and it was probably sweated off by now._

_Finally reaching the freezing ocean water, she jumped right in not waiting to adjust to the cold water. Besides, she needed to cool off fast as the heat was getting to her. However, the moment she jumped in, a wave caught her and took her legs out from underneath her. Within seconds, she was under water, bombarded by the waves, and she couldn't find the surface. No matter how hard she swam, she couldn't reach the top, which was odd as she didn't go in too deep._

_For what seemed like the longest minute of her life, she was stuck under the water; her lungs strained for air, and her heart raced, trying to keep up the will to fight. For that minute, she thought she was going to die, but suddenly, the crashing ocean calmed and the water pulled back, leaving her to violently cough on the cold, wet sand._

" _What the hell was that?" she asked, her throat sore. Her breathing was heavy._

" _It's your fault."_

_Toni flinched at the cold, harsh voice. "What?" She asked, looking up. Her newly found breath was stolen from her at the sight of the man in front of her._

" _It's your fault," Barnes stated, bitterly. He was covered in blood from head to toe, and his combat uniform was torn and burnt in multiple places. The left sleeve of his uniform was missing and his skin on his arm was scorched._

_As she looked at him, the weather suddenly changed to dark, stormy, and cold, and the sounds of the beach could no longer be hear as the waves started to viciously crash behind her, drowning out all other sounds. "I don't understand," she said, almost crying, as she got to her knees, which sunk into the wet sand. The water behind her taunted her._

" _You didn't choose. You were selfish," he snapped, his eyes burning into her. "You let me die."_

_Toni hugged herself, trying to get warm, but she didn't dare move closer to Barnes, who looked murderous. "Choose? I don't understand."_

" _Why didn't you choose me? Why didn't you save me?" He took a step toward her, limping. "Instead, you let me die!"_

_She had never heard him so angry and it scared her. "Bucky," she uttered._

" _Don't call me that! You let me die!" He was almost growling at her. "You rather go to the beach than save me. You rather be with Rogers! Did I mean nothing to you?" He turned from her as the sight of her disgusted him._

_Toni felt the tears start to flow down her face. "I had to."_

" _No, you didn't. You just had to choose me!" He paused. "Didn't you care?"_

" _I did-no… I do care. I cared so much it hurts, Barnes." Tears ran down her face. She couldn't understand why he was like this. She knew she deserved it, but she didn't want him to turn out like this._

" _Liar."_

" _Bucky," she called again._

_He violently turned back, anger rolled off him. "Look at me! I'm dead because of you!" he hissed. His face was bruised and bloody beyond belief._

" _I'm sorry!"_

_He turned away from her again and started to walk away from her without saying a word._

" _Bucky! I'm sorry. Oh, God, I'm sorry!" No matter what she said, he didn't turn back and he just kept walking. "No, please don't go! Don't leave!"_

_But he didn't stop. He kept going, and soon he disappeared into the darkness._

Breathing heavy, Toni bolted up, almost too quickly. "Bucky, don't go." Tears lined her face as they dripped, creating a small puddle below her. Before she could catch her breath, someone grabbed hold of her shoulder, making her jump. Her heart raced at the contact.

Before she could anything, her father spoke, "Toni, it's okay." He hushed her like a father would do with a soft voice, but she could see the hesitation in his eyes as he did so.

Her heart was beating fast, and she was unable to catch her breath. "W-what are you going here?" He voice betrayed her in every fashion.

"We've been looking for you," Howard said, his hand still on her shoulder.

"Go away," she begged, trying to push him off. The weakness in her voice surprised her.

He studied her, as if he was trying to figure out what to say. He was clearly in unknown water and he didn't know what to say. "It's okay." She looked away. "Toni, it's okay to be hurting."

She stared at him in disbelief. Did he just say it was okay to feel something? This man didn't believe in sharing emotions. He didn't believe in emotions at all, thinking of them as a weakness. "No, it's not," she argued, resisting the urge to snap back with some snarky comment.

"You can't keep it in."

Toni looked him. "Why are you looking for me?" She didn't want to talk about it, because no one understood.

"The Colonel doesn't want you to be alone. And Carter and Rogers are worried about you…for good reason," Howard stated, kneeing in front of her. "You did _just_ come out of a coma. You should be resting."

She didn't want to hear about those two, not when she was shattered. Her heart wasn't able to take it. "I don't like hospitals."

"Not really a hospital." She glared. "Well, it isn't. Just a medical bay for injured soldiers," Howard said, shrugging.

"Do you know how Barnes died?" she asked, changing the subject.

Howard's glance soften. "It won't help."

"How would you know!" she snapped, shoving him. She couldn't sit still; she had to get up.

He allowed her to get pass him. "It won't settle your mind." He watched her as she wobbled toward a window. "It will just make it worse," he said, getting to his feet.

Toni glanced at him before staring at the covered window. Since entering the building, she had been able to warm up a little bit, but she still felt shaky, and she knew she would be ill in the morning. "You don't understand. It's worse not knowing…" She closed her eyes. "I keep seeing him dying over and over in my head, and each is worse than the last." She was hard core sobbing.

"If you want to know, you can have the report, but it won't help." His voice was soft.

"I don't know what to do." Wiping her eyes, she glanced back toward his direction, her eyes focused on her device. She got the power core connected, and though there were some bugs, it should work. Maybe, she should just go home, and forget about everything. However, it was risky, because she hadn't tested it yet, and there was no telling where it would send her.

"Toni, come with me."

The exhausted, worn out, heartbroken genius from the future was too tired to fight with her father, who she had to keep reminding herself that she hated, that he was an ass, as the guy in front of her was anything but that. She took a deep painful breath as she knew he was right. She was too drained to do anything. "Okay." She closed her eyes, which were blood red from her crying.

Howard seemed almost shocked that she agreed to go with him. "Good," he said, picking up a coat from the table and crossing to her. "Put this on." He held it out to her.

"I don't like being handled things," she said, feebly. She sound pathetic as she had a hard time controlling her breathing.

He let out a chuckling sigh before he wrapped the coat around her. "I wonder about you."

Toni closed her eyes as she felt his arms around her; there was something warm about it. "Get in line," she whispered. She was too tired to fight against her father, even if she felt uncomfortable. Why wasn't he like this in the future? Why was he distant then? It wasn't because he was interested in her, though he did throw out a few one liners. It was like he cared, and that annoyed her slightly. He should've been like this in the future not now, though she would take it now as she needed it now.

"And you aren't wearing any shoes. I hadn't thought about that," he said with a sigh as he stepped back from her and glanced down.

Fighting to stay upright, she wriggled her feet as she held the jacket tight around her. "…No. I just…" She wasn't thinking right when she bolted from the room.

"I understand," he said, as he suddenly picked her up in bridal style with one arm under her knees and the other one at her middle back surprising Toni.

"What are you doing?" Her voice was soft, almost non-existent. Her exhaustion was getting to her and she was having a difficult time keeping her eyes open.

"Picking you up? Good thing that you aren't heavy," he joked.

"I can't get men to dote on me hand and foot if I was," she teased. Joking with him felt nice.

"Let's get you back," he said, holding her tightly. He could see the sleepiness in her eyes as she fought to stay awake. "You rest. I got you."

Ignoring her gut, she rested her head against his warm chest, but listening to her inner self, she kept her eyes open, even if it was a fight. "Thanks."

She felt him laugh before she heard it. "See, I'm not that bad," he said as he turned from the window toward the door.

Seeing her device, which was locked away in a heavy duty case, she spoke, "Nope, you're still that bad." Her eyelids felt heavy and she could barely keep them open. If only she had enough energy to get to her device, because no matter what the risk was, she would use it to get home.

"Geez, what can I do to get you to like me," he teased, as he opened the door with little trouble even with his arms full.

She closed her eyes for a second as the cold air blasted her and she buried herself deeper into her father's chest. After readjusting herself to the cold, she thought about opening her eyes, but she couldn't. Her body wouldn't listen to her, no matter how hard she tried. She was too tired.

"I got her," Howard said, speaking to someone.

Toni, still unable to open her eyes, started to drift, even though she was interested in seeing who he was speaking to. It was a losing battle, as she felt the world disappear around her for seconds at a time.

"She doesn't like to listen. She's going to be the death of me," Phillips stated, bitterly. Toni could practically see his annoyed face as he spoke.

"Oh, you knew she's growing on you," Howard replied with a laugh.

"I think she's growing on you," Salty countered. "I also think you're going on her, which I thought I would never see."

Toni pulled slightly away from Howard's chest and tried to open her eyes again. She was only able to open them enough to make out fuzzy shapes. _Growing on them?_ She thought. _Howard's growing on me?_

"She's a child," the colonel added. "I feel like I have to babysit."

Toni wanted to protest but keeping her eyes open took all of her strength and she started to drift again.

"She just-" Howard started.

"Is she okay?" Rogers asked, Toni knowing his voice from anywhere. If she didn't know any better, he sound worried, but he didn't have a right since he was too busy kissing Loud Mouth Sassy Pants. There was something else in his tone that Toni couldn't place.

Howard tightened his grip on Toni. "Physically, she will be fine. Emotionally, I'm not sure." There was a long pause. "When I found her, she was having a nightmare… It was about Barnes."

"Toni," Steve uttered.

Toni kind of wished she was asleep for this part of the conversion, because she didn't want to listen to them talk about her. She hated when people discussed her like she was something needed to be fixed. She didn't need to be fixed; she didn't want to be fixed. She needed to be left alone to deal with her pain.

"She just _needs_ time, Rogers," Phillips stated, his voice firm, hard. "She was close to Sergeant Barnes."

Just before sleep over came her, she watched Rogers glare at Phillips, which was so unlike him. There was something in his look, but Toni was too tired to ponder it, and she fell asleep watching Rogers talk to Phillips. What she did know was that she wanted to go home and beat the crap out of a certain god.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't mean to make this chapter so long, but for the proper angst, it was called for.
> 
> And with Bucky, I know it feels too soon, but there is a reasoning behind it. And again, we all know he will be back. :) At least, she seems closer to her father, right?
> 
> But now I leave you with wondering what Loki is up as he is always up to something.


	23. A No Laughing Zone

Toni was sitting on her cot, staring at the wall of her small quarters that she shared with Peggy, who was more annoying than ever since that kiss with Captain Ass.

Toni didn't know what it was, but she wanted to beat him, and it wasn't because she was jealous. Toni refused to be jealous because there was no reason for her to be. Who would want Rogers anyways? He was an asshole with who didn't know what he wanted.

"Are you okay, Toni?" Peggy asked, eyeing her from her side of their quarters.

The genius from the future looked at Peggy from the corner of her eyes. She wasn't sure if she liked this friendly Peggy, though she supposed it was better than the bitchy Peggy. "Just tired," she responded as Peggy packed.

They were on the move again and the word around the camp was that it could be _the_ battle with Skully as Zola had given them what they needed to finish off Schmidt for good. "You should stay behind and rest," Peggy replied, stepping to Toni's side.

Ever since Toni had bolted out of medical wing, Peggy had been 'glued' to her side, making sure she was okay and never alone. "I'm fine, Mother Hen," Toni replied mockingly. "And I'm going." She was tired of people trying to tell her what to do. If she said she was fine then she was fine... even if she was exhausted.

Peggy backed up and stepped back to her side. "Alright then," Peggy stated, still eyeing her. "And cover that reactor up. Just because Steve and the rest of the Commandos know about it doesn't mean we want the entirety of the camp to know."

Toni took a deep breath, suddenly remembering that they had learned about it when she was out cold. She had heard it had confused the guys massively and there was some talk of her being a robot, which she wished she was. If that were the case, then she wouldn't be feeling this overwhelming guilt.

Why couldn't she go back to the time before the reactor, before the Iron Man suit and just be that egoist bitch that she was before?

"Got it, mother," she said while buttoning up her shirt. With a deep breath, Peggy started again, "Are you sure you're okay? If you ever want to talk, I'm here."

After she finished stuffing her things into her bag, Toni zipped it up and set it on the floor. "So you and Rogers, now?" she asked, changing the subject, though she didn't know if that topic was any better than the last.

"We haven't labelled it…" The agent said, slowly as if she was hesitant to speak about it in front of Toni.

"Ah," Toni uttered. There were parts of her that wanted to spoil the ending for Peggy, but she wouldn't play that card. She didn't need or want to play that card. Why in the hell would she want Rogers?

"He's Rogers again?" Peggy asked, eyeing her. Toni took a deep breath as she slipped off the bed and onto her feet. "It makes things easier," she replied. It would've been simpler if she had followed her rules in the first place and hadn't gotten close to them.

"Do you think that's wise? Shutting yourself out isn't healthy," the agent said. _Her and Rogers really do belong together, don't they?_ She thought to herself. "We've better hurry," Toni stated, pulling the pack to her back. Her journal was buried at the bottom of her bag, hiding it from the world, as she didn't wanted anyone to read or even know about it. It was the only thing she shared her secrets with, but she wondered if that was smart as there was a chance that someone would find it.

"Toni."

"Don't Toni me," the genius snapped, glaring back at her. "I'm sick and tired of people Toni-ing me." With that, Toni bolted out of their quarters, toward the huge aircraft.

"Don't go alone!" She heard Peggy yelled, knowing why. Team Skully wanted her for something, but she couldn't bring herself to care.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

The plane was the same plane from before, and it still made her nervous to no end. Maybe, it was because she knew all the schematics and issues with these planes. Maybe, she knew the likelihood of these things being shot down from the sky. Maybe, she knew what this plane was missing in terms of technology, but whatever it was, she had to fight her flight urge to remain on-board and take a seat.

Toni sat down near the front of the craft where Phillips usually sat and before putting her pack away, she pulled out a pen and her journal to sketch out another design for her Iron Man Suits as it was one of the few things that could calm her.

The journal was filled with many different designs, which was just a testament really. A testament to how much her mind was a fucked up place. Opening her journal, she skipped toward the back, looking for a blank page. Mixed in between her designs were her mind's random writing about her guilt and shame. Some of the writing took up pages while the other times she wrote on the edges of the pages that featured her suits' designs.

"What do you have there?" Toni suppressed her flinch and slammed the journal shut in the hopes to hide her designs.

"Just a book, Salty," she replied, glancing at the Colonel as he took the seat next to her.

Phillips buckled himself in. "Just a book?" he asked.

"Yes, just a book," she stated, looking past him toward the entrance of the plane, where she noticed a few people boarding. Though she knew it was stupid, she couldn't help but look for Barnes as the Commandos entered and it was a blow to the heart when he didn't appear. Even now, it was hard to believe that he was dead and she had to keep reminding herself that he was and there was no changing that fact.

Why did he have to die? Why did she let it happen? Would it have changed anything if she had stopped it? What did his death mean?

When Rogers stepped on board, Toni was snapped back to reality and turned away, not wanting to look at him. She hadn't spoken to him since the night she woke up from the coma and she had no interest in talking to him. She was going to keep her distance because there was a chance that she might snap at him for being the Captain Asshole if she didn't. She still couldn't understand what he was thinking when he kissed her.

Rogers took the seat directly across from Toni and the Howling Commandos followed down the row next to the Captain. Jones and Dugan glanced at Toni, if only to make sure she was fine before turning back to face their fellow commanders and rejoining their conversation. It was Rogers who kept staring at her but Toni wouldn't let it get to her.

Talking, Peggy boarded the craft, as she went over the next battle. Like everyone, she was stressing over this as it could be the end of Schmidt and it had to go prefect. There was so many things counting on this, and one was Barnes, as they wanted his death to mean something.

"I think that's it," she said, taking the seat on the other side of Salty. Phillips nodded, taking the report from Peggy.

"We're ready to go!" Howard said as he climbed aboard and made his way toward the front of the plane. In one hand, he held Toni's device in a hard metal case, while he held a briefcase in the other. "Everything's in order, and we'll be taking off in five."

"Good," Phillips replied, still looking over the report from Peggy.

Toni glanced at Phillips before she turned to Howard, who had taken a step next to her. "Comfy seat?" she asked while wondering why he was sitting next to her.

"Not as comfortable as the seats on one of my jets," he replied, sliding the hard case under his seat. "They're like sitting on clouds. You'll love them, trust me."

She narrowed her eyes at him. "Will? You think I'll see them?" she asked.

Howard opened his briefcase, took out of the file and held it out to her. "Of course. What else will you do after the war?" he asked. "And you will love my labs." There was a brief second of silence before he laughed as she still hadn't take the file. "Oh, wait, I forgot. You don't like to be handed things."

Toni narrowed her eyes at him as she yanked the folder from his hands, knowing what it was instantly. She tried to fight looking over to Rogers, who was feeling just as guilty as she was about Barnes, but she couldn't stop herself and turned to him. For what felt like an eternity, they made eye contact as if he knew what she had. His eyes felt like they were drilling into her, and she couldn't help but shudder.

Turning to Howard, she asked "What are you referring to? Do you think I'll work for you?"

"Why not? What else do you plan to do?" Howard asked.

She had one plan and that was getting home to her time. "Don't you think I'll kill you or something?" she asked, opening the folder he gave her. From the corner of her eye, she eyed Phillips, who had finally put the report away and she lost the will to read the file Howard gave her.

"I think I grew on you enough for that not to happen." Toni wanted to laugh, but she couldn't as it didn't feel right to laugh, not after everything that had happened, but why was it so hard not to?

"So a job offer? Aren't you afraid that your board's going to like me better and make me CEO?" she asked, trying not to laugh. Why was it so hard?

"Oh, you think you can run Stark Industries, do you?" he asked.

She couldn't contain that laugh, which echoed throughout the craft, drawing several heads toward her. "I can probably handle it better than you," Toni said, feeling slightly better. That laugher had brightened her day. "And I would make a sexier CEO than you."

"You want to bet?" Howard asked, teasing her back.

Phillips chuckled next to them. "So nice that you two are getting along," he joked.

"You call that getting along?" Toni replied, holding the folder tightly. Did she deserve to read it when she was making jokes with her father? "I'm planning to take over his company and then he'll have to work for me." She held back her laugh this time as it was the truth. She would run Stark Industries in the future, though her father probably wouldn't like how.

"I'd like to see you try," came Howard's response.

"Is that a challenge? I live off challenges, Stark," she said, eyeing Phillips. She could barely see Peggy's form over Salty, but she could tell the Agent was listening. Why would Peggy care about her conversion with Howard? Was she shocked by Toni's playful tone like she was herself?

"Should I be scared?" Howard replied.

"I would be," Dugan interrupted from across the plane. "She can be scary when she wants to be."

"I can handle her," Howard replied with a smirk. "I-"

"This isn't the time for this," Rogers interrupted, glancing between Toni and Howard. He had affectedly silenced the craft with his harsh, cold tone and glare. "We have a mission ahead of us to prepare for."

Toni wasn't sure what to make of Rogers and his outburst, but she didn't care for it. However, after taking a deep breath to calm down and think, she knew where he was coming from and she felt ashamed. She was never any good with understanding how to deal with her emotions or how to act. Was it okay to laugh? Was it okay to talk about him?

"Rogers," Phillips called, giving him the look. "Easy." Rogers looked at the Colonel before glowering at the floor of the plane. His hands were fisted at his side as if he was holding something back.

"I think it's just our nerves, gentlemen," Peggy stated, trying to cut through the tension. "Let's take some deep breaths and _relax_."

With a deep breath, Toni leaned her head back and closed her eyes as everything came rushing back to her and it was all too much. She listened to the sound of the aircraft as it flew through the sky to calm her.

She held the folder firmly against lap as she was afraid it would disappear. She had to read it to settle her mind, but she wanted to do it alone, though she knew no one would let her.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

 

After everything was settled for the mission commencing in 12 hours, Toni, with a heavy coat, found a spot to read the report alone. It was a bitch to sneak away, because no one would let her out of their sight and it was annoying. She wasn't someone who needed to be babysat, though she did do risky things at times. She just needed to get away so she could figure out what was going on in her head.

Located in deep within the Alps, it was extremely cold and Toni needed several layers to keep warm. It would've been wise to stay inside or by a fire, but she wasn't thinking at the moment. Sitting down at the base of a tree in a pile of soft snow, she took out the file and opened it.

She had some trouble flipping through the pages as the gloves she wore made it difficult to flip through. However, it would be exceedingly stupid to take them off as she would get frostbite in a few minutes and she liked her fingers a lot. Plus, she was already pushing it as it was, being out here, but she needed to do this. If she didn't, she would surely go crazy.

After reading through the file, she sat completely still. She knew Rogers blamed himself for Bucky's death but, according to the files, it wasn't. Bucky was doing what he was trained to and it wasn't anyone's fault but that HYDRA's soldier who fired at Barnes who was foolish enough to block using Rogers' shield. She knew Rogers felt guilty because he felt that he could've done better to save Barnes' life. Toni didn't blame him for it at all.

She felt the tears flow as she thought about Bucky and her last moments with him. He had promised her that he would come back to her, so why hadn't he? It wasn't fair that he kissed her and left her confused. It wasn't freaking fair. How dare he do that? Why was she blaming him? It wasn't his fault. If he could have, he would've came back to her.

Toni closed the file harshly as her hands shook. Perhaps her father had been correct about not knowing, because knowing was horrible. Barnes' fall kept repeating in her head as she thought about what he might have had been feeling when he knew he was falling to his inevitable death. What had went through his mind?

She felt ill just thinking about it because she couldn't even begin to imagine what he had gone through.

Shaking her head, she got to feet and shook the snow off. With a deep breath, she rolled up the folder, lifted up the back of her jacket and stick it into her pants pocket. After making sure it was secure, she made her way toward Howard and her device.

She wanted to give him the file back, not wanting it anymore, as all it did was haunt her, making her question everything. Plus, she couldn't take this time anymore and she wanted to use the device. Just as Howard and his work station came into sight, someone grabbed a hold of her upper right arm pulling her toward a few trees.

Unsure of who had grabbed her, Toni freaked out and started to kick at her attacker, who seemed unaffected by her hits. On the last swing of her arm, he caught it. "Let me go!" she demanded, wondering why she never listened to anyone.

"Toni, easy. It's me." Toni stiffened as she looked up to Rogers, who sported a worried look in his eyes.

Why was he bugging her? Was it about her walking around by herself? Was it about the promise? Sure, she made it, but it seemed like Agent Sassy Kissy Face was all he needed. "Let go of me, Rogers," she demanded, trying to pull her arm free.

"Why are you alone?" he asked, his eyes drilling into her. "Do you know how dangerous that is? HYDRA wants you."

This was why she never listened to anyone, especially him. She hated how he made her feel like a child, granted she acted like a child sometimes... but he didn't need to be given any more excuses to treat her as such. "I can handle myself. That woman just got lucky. It won't happen again."

"Toni," he said with a warning tone.

She took a deep breath because he did have a point. That Commander did say they were after her, though it was still a wonder why. How would they even know about her unless they had information about the future? "I'm going to see Stark, and you can watch me as I walk." She tried to turn to leave but he wouldn't let her. "What?" she asked, annoyed. Why was he holding her like this?

"We need to talk," he said, still not letting her arm go. "Can we talk?" he asked softly, almost as if he was scared. He eyed her, as if she was going to break.

She narrowed her eyes at him, still trying to pull herself away. "What's there to talk about?"

"Toni, _please_."

"Fine. Just let go of my arm," she said with a sigh.

The Captain released her arm but he didn't move back from her. "I want to talk about what happen between us. It-"

"Save it, Rogers," Toni said, interrupting him. Of all the things she wanted to talk about, that kiss wasn't one of them. That was the last thing she wanted to talk about because it wasn't as if that kiss meant anything anyways. He was hurting and needed comfort, which Toni didn't blame him for. "It's fine. It meant nothing. I understand. Now that's over with, are we done?"

"That isn't it," he said; his voice was all too soft. His voice reminded her of the Shrimp she first met.

Toni exhaled, harshly. "It is, and if you and Agent Carter need a recommendation for a restaurant, don't ask me. I usually just skip that step in the date if you know what I mean," she said, winking while forcing a smirk on her lips.

Rogers' face reddened. "I… Toni… No…I…can guess… but Peggy and I aren't going steady."

With a small laugh, she stared at his red face, not sure where he was going, but she wasn't going to try and figure out. She had to care to find out and she didn't care. "Okay," she said, turning from him. "And don't tell her that."

"Toni," he called to her.

She silently stood there for a few seconds thinking before she turned back to him. "I don't know what you want from me, Rogers."

"You're mad at me." Rogers took a deep breath. "You referred to me by my last name."

"That's what this is about?" she asked, huffing out an annoyed laugh. "This is me, Rogers. I'm not mad. I just like to be by myself." She took a deep breath as she turned from him. "I just need space."

"Bucky wouldn't want this," Rogers stated as he stepped toward her. "He wouldn't want you to cut yourself off."

Anger flashed through Toni as she spoke, "You have some nerve, Rogers. Some fucking nerve. First, you kiss me, then you kiss Sassy Pants. What can't make up your mind? Then I start to open up to Stark for only God knows why and you get pissy."

She tried to calm herself down with a few deep breaths, but it wasn't working. "You don't know me, Rogers. You have no fucking idea of who I am, where I came from or what the hell I'm going through, so leave me the _fuck_ alone," she snapped, turning to storm away.

"Then tell me. Tell me how you got that thing in your chest," he said, calmly. Even after she had snapped at him, he was just as calm as he ever was. "Tell about your life. I want to know."

"Why do you want to know?" she asked, her tone colder than her surroundings.

"Because I realized that I don't know you, not really. Why were you in that lot? Did you ever get your memory back? Did you really have memory lost in the first place? Why are you here, fighting in this war?" he asked. "What happened to you to make you close out the world? And I know that this isn't about Bucky."

Toni stared at him, breathing deeply, as she tried to control her breathing. "Let it go. Why don't you go find Carter and bother her?" She hated that he kissed Peggy, even if she shouldn't care.

"I want to know."

"No, you don't."

"Toni."

She hated how he said her name. "Then why in the hell did you kiss her?" she asked, snapping. "Why in the hell did you kiss _me_?" He wasn't allowed to do this to her, not after everything that had happened. His expression softened, falling at the sight of her.

"Toni," he uttered again.

"No, answer?" she asked, after not hearing a reason. She stood still, frozen in her own thoughts, thinking if she should say what was on her mind. "Let me tell you something: I don't let people in, Rogers. I learned that the hard way, and I made a mistake in letting Barnes…and you in. So I'm correcting that."

"What happened to make you like this?"

"Really? Bucky just died and you're asking me that?" she asked.

"You were like this before he died," he said pushing her patience. Why couldn't he just let this go? Why couldn't he understand she didn't want to talk?

"Just leave me alone and go bother Agent Carter. You made your choice, and I have to say, Sassy Pants has that sexy Librarian voice that everyone craves so I completely understand your choice."

With that and without saying another word, she turned from him and continued toward Howard and her device. Talking to him made her go crazy and she refused to do so for anything longer.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

When Toni came across Howard, he was alone in the science station, working hard as he always did when it came down to it.

"Hey," she said, as she entered. He looked up from what he was working on and smiled. The table in front of him was filled with regular 1940's guns and each looked different from the last. The table behind him was filled with stolen HYDRA weapons and they were glowing brightly.

"Oh, look who's here," he said with a smirk.

She reached for the file in her back pocket and threw it on the table in front of him. "There you go. I'm done with it," she said. "And you were correct… but don't let it go to your head." Howard didn't make any movement toward the folded, bent up file.

"In this case, I didn't wish to be," he said, eyeing her. "Are you okay?"

She wondered when she had gotten to the point that she preferred her absent father to Captain America. "I'm peachy… In fact, would you happen to have a peach? I have a peach craving right now," she said, hoping to change the subject.

"Sorry, no peaches," he said.

"Damn," Toni replied with a weak smile.

Howard sighed as he picked up one of the rifles on the table to examine it. "Rogers?" he asked, not looking at her.

"Huh?" she uttered as she stepped closer to the table.

He put the rifle down and leaned forward against the table. "I could tell from the plane that he wanted to talk to you by the way he was staring at you and I can assume from the look on your face that he did."

"I don't like that you know these things," she said, giving him one of her famous looks.

"Didn't go well?" he asked.

Toni could weight that question on a few different scales and each would be different. "Well, it depends on how you look at it. It's probably for the best," she said, shrugging.

Howard narrowed his eyes, studying her. "That's not what I expected."

She looked at him, sensing that he wanted to say something else. "What did you expect?"

"Nothing."

"Stark, what did you expect?" she asked, still feeling weird at addressing someone else with her last name even if it was his last name first.

"It's inappropriate after everything that had happened," he said with a sigh.

"What does that mean?" she snapped.

He took a deep breath before he answered, "I thought it was obvious. I have seen the way you two look at each other and then there's the fact that he never left your hospital bed unless he had to."

Toni glared at him. "That means nothing. And here I thought we were getting somewhere," she stated as she turned from him and walked out. He didn't say anything else as he watched her walk away. As she exited, she wondered why the hell he would think that.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni had no idea why she was acting like this, but her emotional self was pissing her off. She kept telling herself to grow a pair because she couldn't deal with these emotions anymore.

Yes, she knew it was okay to feel emotional, especially after losing Bucky, but she didn't want to feel these emotions. If Bucky ever came back to life, she was going to kill him again, because no one should ever be able to make her feel this way. NO ONE.

"Ms. Robot!" The genius from the future felt her eye twitch as she turned toward the direction of the voice.

"Ms. Robot?" she asked, eyeing Jones as he ran up to her.

"Well, it's the best explanation we can come up with for that thing being in your chest," he said with a smile. "I would love to be a robot myself."

The Howling Commandos kept referring to her as a robot after seeing the Reactor, and they refused and couldn't think of anything else. They just couldn't wrap their minds around it. Toni, for her part, couldn't help but wish she were a robot so she wouldn't be feeling like this. "So what are you up to?" she asked.

"Just getting things ready before we storm Schmidt's final hide out," he said with a small smile.

"I see, but if you don't mind, I need to see Phillips," she said, having no interest in talking to Jones or anyone. It was too much work to be a smartass when she was a wreck on the inside.

He smiled while bowing to her. "Au revoir," he said. Toni responded with nothing as she watched him walk away, but she knew it wasn't over with. She was too attached to the people of this time...and that was a problem.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

When Toni came upon Salty, he was alone, looking over something as he sat silently at his makeshift desk. "Hey, Salty," she called as she entered.

He glanced up from his desk and stared at her for a few seconds before he answered. "Sark," he said, still using that fake last name of hers while officers walked in and out to talk to Phillips. "What are you doing here?" he asked, eyeing her.

"I need-" She started, but Phillips cut her off. "You're not going. You're staying back with Stark," he said. "It's too dangerous, and you _did_ just come out of a coma."

Toni narrowed her eyes at him in annoyance. "One, I'm fine, and two, that isn't what I was going to ask. However, I'm fine and capable of going out," she said. Why did everyone insist on treating her like a child?

"If that isn't what this is about, then what?" he asked.

She took a deep breath before she spoke, "I'm leaving." His eyes widened and his mouth dropped open.

"What?" he asked, completely in shock. "What do you mean by you're leaving, because I can't have you going out by yourself."

Toni smiled slightly. "Going back to my time." She knew it was risky and that she should test it before using it, but she couldn't bear to stay anymore where she didn't belong. She was a woman out of time. She just wanted to go back to her life, where she could focus on her suits and only her suits.

"So your device is working?" he asked, still holding the file, but his focus was still on her.

She took a seat across of Phillips and leaned forward. "I have no idea, but I can't sit here anymore and do nothing," she said quietly.

He put the file down slowly as he studied her. "You're being emotional. You need to test that device before you do anything," he said.

Toni looked down and stared at her hands. "This isn't something I can just test and see if it works. I have to turn it on and see where it takes me." It was a big risk and it could kill her if it was anything like the last time, but she couldn't stay any longer.

"And if you end up dead?" he questioned carefully.

"Then so be it," she said. "Many scientists have died in the name of science. It's kind of like an honor." She knew what it sounded like; it sounded like someone who was defeated. It was a voice of someone who didn't care.

"Is this about Sgt. Barnes?" Phillips asked. "Or about Rogers and Carter?"

"Really? You're belittling me to the female stereotype?" she snapped at him with a glare and a sharp edge to her words. She kicked the chair back and stood. "This isn't about them. It's about me and the fact that I shouldn't be here."

"I can't help but feel you're being emotional about this," he said, holding his ground. He didn't move to counter Toni, but then again, he didn't need to move to overpower her. His voice alone could do that.

Toni exhaled harshly as she glared at him. "I'm not being emotional," she said through clenched teeth, though knowing that she was. However, she knew this was for the best, even if her emotions were running wild. She didn't belong here.

"Who are you lying to? Me or yourself?"

"I wasn't asking for permission. I'm just letting you know," she responded while avoiding his question like the plague.

Phillips took a deep breath. "And there's nothing that I can say to stop you?" he asked.

"No, there isn't," she said, turning away from him.

She was scared to use the device as it might stop her fading reactor, which could kill her. However, she had been preparing for her death for years. She never expected to live this long. She was supposed to have died years ago... and there was a part of her that wondered why she wasn't dead.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Toni Stark, refusing to be known as anything else, made her way to the Science Station so she could go back to being herself, back to the future. She didn't belong here, where she felt like a fool and a pretender. She wanted to be herself, where she could be an asshole and not have to worry about anyone else but herself.

To her luck, she just had to deal with the few guards stationed by the door, who only nodded to her as she passed. They were used to her late nights in the lab, and they paid no attention to her. Once inside, she looked around to make sure she was alone. Sure, it was late and there was a small chance that anyone would be, but she just had to make sure.

Seeing that she was, she made her way toward her device, which was locked in a metal chest on the other side of the room. No one, besides Salty, Howard, and herself, knew it was there, and no one else had the key. They all knew it was risky to keep it here, but it was the safest place for it while they were on the move. There was also nowhere else to keep it and it wasn't like Phillips trusted her completely, because he didn't. He trusted that she was telling the truth, but that was it. Toni didn't blame him for it as it was part of the game.

After obtaining her device, she laid it out in front of her. She stared at it for a second, wondering. Should she do it here? Take it somewhere else? If it was anything like the last time, it would attract a lot of attention, and she couldn't allow that.

...Then there was the fact that she doubted herself. Was she really going to do this? Was she really risking her life just to get home? Even after a few minutes of that negative thinking, she knew she was.

With a deep breath, Toni reached for the disconnected wire that she had left disconnected from the core, because she didn't want to risk the device going off by itself. If it did, not only would someone get hurt but she would be stuck here.

If she was stuck in this time, then she didn't know what she would do. What _could_ she do? She couldn't work at Stark with her Father, thought it would be funny to see mini her when she was born.

Shaking her head, she turned her attention back to her device, which laid open calling to her. She reached for it, and just as she was about to reconnect the wire, she heard a thump outside. At first, she didn't think much of it as there could be a million reasons for it, but with the second thump, it had to be something. "Howard?" she called out, walking toward the entrance.

As she was like him in many ways, he could've been a night owl like her, but when he didn't answer, she knew it wasn't him. He would've answered her… unless this was a prank. He wouldn't be pranking her, would he? The future version of her father would not... but the past Howard seemed totally capable of it. "Stark, if this is a joke, I'm going to hang you up by your toes, and leave you out to dry," she warned dangerously. "Stark!" There was still no answer, which was starting to worry her.

She glanced back at her device for a second before she continued to the entrance. "Don't make me kill you and steal your company," she hissed as she pushed open the flap. She took a step out and looked around the darkened camp for any sign of movement. She didn't see anything, but even in the dark, she could make something out on the ground and as she stepped closer to see what it was, her breath was stolen from her.

On the ground a few feet away from her, the two officers, who had been guarding the entrance, were lying on the ground. She wasn't sure if they were dead but she didn't want to find out, not when the person who did this was still out there. Knowing from the many horror movies she had watched, it was never a good idea to run into the darkness as that was normally where the murderer killed you.

However, she knew she couldn't stay here, where the culprit could get her too.

_Where is everyone?_ She thought to herself as the camp looked empty.

Toni quickly back stepped inside and ran to her device, packing it into the case as fast as she could. She knew the first thing that she should've done was go find someone, but her device was her first priority. If she lost this device, she was beyond screwed. Plus, someone had to be watching her, since they knew she would be here alone and she couldn't risk going out into the open.

Slamming the case shut, she turned back to the entrance, knowing she had to do something. However, when she turned back to the flap, she noticed someone standing there, watching her, and it wasn't a friend.

Toni's heart raced as she recognized the man from the bar and her heart beat even faster when her mind registered that it was the same man from the alley. He was the man, who was haunting her dreams, and to make matters worse, he had a knife in his hand.

It took a few seconds before Toni's senses kicked in and she could think. She had a fighting chance, considering how many guns were in her hand's reach. As not to draw attention, she slowly reached for a gun, but froze, feeling a knife to her neck. Though she tried to control it, she shuddered visibly as she wondered how someone had gotten behind her without her noticing.

Behind her was the same female HYDRA soldier from before and she was holding the knife tightly against her neck. "So alone," she said, mocking her. "No one's going to help you." Toni knew it was a risk when she went out alone, but she had to, and it wasn't like she couldn't take care of herself, though now wasn't a good example.

She hated the idea that she was weak and need someone to protect her. "Like I need help," she said, struggling against the female commander, whose name still escaped her. If Toni wasn't pissed or if she cared at all, she would ask for the woman's name, but that was a sign of respect. She did not respect this woman.

"So do I get a last meal? A phone call?"

"Shut it," the woman hissed. "I do not care for your stupid remarks today."

"Well, I don't care for your man hands, but you know, we never get what we want," Toni said, trying to inch closer to the guns on the table.

The Commander pressed the blade tighter against Toni's neck, drawing blood. "No one cares for your mouth, but that does not seem to stop you," she replied angrily.

Her crazy stalker stepped forward, alarmed at the blood dripping from Toni's throat. "What are doing? My master wants her alive."

"Your master is not my concern nor is he my superior," the Commander replied. "I do not care what he wants or thinks." Her accent was heavy and it almost enough to drown out the meaning of her words.

"And what about the Red Skull? He wants her alive," the stalker said, trying to reason with her. Toni glanced toward her stalker, realizing that he was a part of the third party that this freak commander was speaking about before, but it left her with questions.

Who the hell was this master? And did Loki have any part in it? There was no doubt in her genius mind that he was involved. Did it have anything to do with that he deal he made her?

"He is a fool," she said. Toni glanced up at the commander who was sorely focused on the stalker, making this her chance. She rammed her elbow in the woman's chest, knocking back only slightly, but it was enough for her to get out of her hold. She ducked under her hand and reached for a gun; however, that was where Toni's luck ran out.

Recovering quickly, the Commander was too fast for Toni, as she grabbed Toni by the neck and threw her hard against the tables, knocking both the guns and the genius to the floor. As the commander approached, the stalker did so as well. "Commander, we need her alive," he warned as his knife in his hand dangled dangerously.

"She needs to learn her lesson," the commander hissed, stepped closer to Toni. "She won't be able to rebel if I break a bone, right?" She asked, glaring down at Toni.

"My master doesn't want her hurt," he said. That sounded weird to Toni, considering how harsh and brutal this man had been back in the alley. There was a point that she thought he was going to severely hurt her, but now, he seemed almost scared. Did his master threatened to kill him if she was? But how would the master know how he treated her?

"It would be easier to handle her," the Commander replied. "We don't need her running away."

Though Toni was up and walking, she still tired easily as she hadn't fully recovered. Lying there on the ground in a pile of guns, she felt exhausted, and there was no chance that she could run for it. From the corner of her eyes, she glanced at the guns, wondering if they were loaded, but she knew the likelihood was low. Guns in the armory were never loaded for safety reasons, though the bullets weren't stored too far away. If only she had been knocked into the table filled with HYDRA weapons which didn't need bullets.

"Just admit you're jealous, which would make things simpler?" Toni teased, knowing full well she was playing with the beast. She hoped that someone would notice the fallen guards and check it out; however, she told Salty that she was leaving, so he might think that it was her device that had misfired, knowing how dangerous and wild it was.

"Just shut up," her stalker hissed. The female Commander laughed.

"She's stalling. How cute," she mocked. "She thinks someone's going to save her, like anyone would. You're an annoyance, who no one likes nor wants, not even the naïve Captain America wants you. How does that feel?" she asked. "And why would he? I bet half this camp would be happy that you're gone, and the only person who has ever actually cared is _dead_."

Toni knew what this woman was doing and she wasn't going to fall for it because that would be exactly what this woman wanted. She wanted Toni to think she was alone, because they wanted to turn her against the Camp. Besides her brain, she wasn't sure why they would want to, because she would probably make them murderous and she would end up dead. "Damn, only half? I was trying so hard to make the whole camp hate me." She reached for one of the gun, and even if was unless, it gave her mind some peace.

She smirked at Toni as she took a step closer. "This is your defense mechanism. You put up a front, trying to portray this cold-hearted bitch, but inside, you're broken, destroyed... so shattered. Though you hide it with everything that you've got, you hope that someone will notice, but no one does or maybe...no one cares. Does it hurt to know no one cares?" she asked.

"You think I care about others? I don't give a flying crap," Toni replied, as she searched for some kind of weapon. Having fallen to the ground as well, her device lay on the floor, exposed to the world; the core was jarred from the center. A few of the wires had snapped back, but it was still connected. "Just here for myself."

"Do you believe these lies you tell yourself?" She asked as she reached for the gun in Toni's hand. "Just fooling yourself." No amount of struggle from Toni could keep the gun in her hand when the commander pried it from her.

"Is there a point to your boring conversation?" she asked. "Are you trying to confess your love for me? If so, I'm sorry. Not interested. Not into the violent type."

"Shu-" Her stalker started. The Commander put her hand up to silence him. "You can stall all you want, because no one's coming, not even the love sick Captain, and you made sure of that when you sent him away, so very heartbroken."

Toni felt herself laugh. "I didn't do anything. If he's heartbroken, it's because of Agent Sassy Kissy Pants," she said.

It was the Commander's turn to laugh. "You're truly a fool," she said, yanking Toni up by the collar. "Let's go, I have grown tired of this child's play."

"Go to hell," Toni hissed as she dug her fingernails into the woman's arm, trying to draw to blood.

"I have a world to help take over," the soldier said.

"Won't work," Toni replied, still fighting. "They know where you're base is, and they're going to destroy it."

Both the Stalker and the Commander laughed as she pulled Toni's collar harder, almost choking her. "It doesn't matter if they know, because they'll meet their death, and you'll be there to watch it."

"Keep dreaming," Toni yelled, kicking at the Commander, who only laughed.

"Let _go_." She had no idea of where this woman's strength came from as no one was this strong normally. It was _super human_.

"Let's go. We've been here far too long," her Stalker said, looking back to the flap.

The Commander glanced at him before looking back at Toni. "Do I need to knock you out or do you promise not to scream, Ms. Robot?" she asked.

That nickname froze Toni, stopping her struggle, as she wondered how long these two were watching her. How much did they know? Did they hear her conversion with Phillips? She hoped not. Why hadn't she notice them? "I'm a screamer. Just ask all my partners," she teased, trying to hide her fear.

"You just like to hear your own voice," the woman stated as she let go of Toni's collar and grabbing her neck.

"Why wouldn't I? I have the voice of an angel," Toni replied.

She tried to smile, but the grip around her neck started to tighten and she was struggling to breathe. Black spots started to enter her sight, clouding her vision, and she knew it wouldn't be long before she was out.

"B…b-bit…" She could barely make out her own words.

"I… your… out," the Commander said, though Toni couldn't make out half of what she said.

"Easy… Need…her…Mas…Loki…" her Stalker stated, walking toward the two women.

"N…N," Toni said, trying to speak; however, she couldn't get anything out as her mind started to jumble. She tried to wake her mind by doing something, but she couldn't even move. Everything she was feeling started to disappear and it was only a few seconds later that Toni felt herself drift off into darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For some reason I feel like Toni is getting captured a lot... haha.
> 
> For those interested folks, I want to go into Captain America: Winter Soldiers, though I would have to get through this story first. :)
> 
> And don't get use to daily updates for I only have a few more pre-written chapters.


	24. Only a matter of Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last pre-written chapter. The next chapter is completed. Just waiting for my beta to return it. Once she has, I will update it for you.

* * *

The first thing Toni became aware of was the splitting headache. The second thing she became aware of the extreme pain in her neck. It was almost too painful to open her eyes, but she didn't keep them shut in fear of being attacked. She had no idea of where she was, and the last thing she remembered was that the bitch commander and her bastard stalker knocking her out, but wherever they took her, it wouldn't be good. It was anything like the last time, it would only mean torture, which would end in death.

In growing fear, she shakily tried to move her arms, but they were tied securely behind her and there was no wiggle in the chains. The only thing Toni could do was lift her head to look around the room, but she couldn't make anything out but fuzzy shapes. It was, however, painfully quiet in the room and the only thing she could hear was the pounding of her own heart in her ear.

It took her eyes a few painfully long seconds to adjust to the excruciatingly bright light, which seemed to get brighter as the time went by. The genius wished someone would turn the lights down, but she knew that wouldn't happen. The people who had her would do whatever it took to wear her down and take what they wanted. Toni wished she knew what they wanted, because this getting kidnap was getting old fast, especially when she had no idea of why they were kidnapping her.

After a few long minutes, Toni's vision had cleared and she was able to make out the room, which had a few church like features like a high circler ceiling; however, the metal arms coming out of the cold, steel ceiling destroyed the illusion. The large glass windows did give it that illusion as well, but the cold, hard lines of the windows were not inviting. There was also a cold draft in the room, which flowed from the windows that out looked the snowy Alps.

She had to give it to Skully on the view alone, because it was a truly breathtaking sight. With the snow covered mountains, it looked like a winter wonderland that Toni would love to explore in her Iron Man Suit and a snowboard. _When I get home, I'm totally doing that,_ she thought to herself.

Feeling the cold draft, Toni shivered as she looked around the room. From her spot in front of the windows, the whole room was open to her, and she knew this was some kind of a lab. She noticed a few blue glowing equipment on lab tables across the room and wires leading everywhere. She wondered briefly if the Tesseract was present in this room as the blue glow was incredibly bright in one of them; however, she doubted that Skully would be that stupid to leave it in here with her, even if she was tied to a chair.

She wiggled in her chains trying to create some sort of lag, but the chains only drug into her side. "Bitch," she cursed, fighting through the discomfort. It was a dull pain, but it was radiating up from her side to her arms. It was also a numbing feeling that was taking over her whole body; however, she wasn't going to give up. She was going to get out of here, and someone was going to get beat.

"That's what I like about you."

That voice snapped Toni out of her thoughts and brought her glance up. To her annoyance, Loki was back, and he was wearing the same baggy thing as before; however, there was a change in his facial expression. He seemed joyous like he just won a major battle and he was ready to gloat. "I'm really getting sick of your ugly face," she said, frustrated

"How can you get sick of my face? And my face is not ugly. It's a face of a god," he joked, as he sat on the top of one of the lab tables. In his hands, he played with a metal, torture tool, which looked like some kind of scoop.

"I don't know if I would consider you a god," she replied, bitterly. She remembered her stalker saying Loki's name before she passed out, but she had no idea why or how he was involved. What was his end game? Did this have to do with the promise he wanted her to make? Why did he want her to make a mystery promise? What could she possible give him that he wanted? The only thing she could think of was Odin's throne, but there was no way for her to give him that, even if she wanted to. What else could he want? What did he want besides ruling the world? Plus, he told her what he wanted wasn't a crime, so how could she help him? Toni had no idea.

"Oh, that hurts," he said, playing hurt.

"P.S., the answer is still no, but you can so let me go," Toni said, eyeing the device in his hand. Then Toni wondered if she should let him know that she knew he was behind this. If she played dumb and not alert him that she knew, she might learn something. She might be able to trick him into giving her something that she could use.

Loki smiled at her. "It's not my fault you got kidnap by Schmidt. You should take my deal."

Her eye twitched, because it was his fault. That stalker was his, though she had no idea of how he was able to do anything in this time as her hand went right through him. However, it seemed like he could touch some things as he was touching that tool. "Why don't you tell me what this deal is first," she said, still struggling in the chair.

"Why would I do that? It's half the fun," he said, jumping off the table. "You agree and then I tell you."

"If your goal is just to annoy me, it's working," Toni replied, watching him. Even with her genius mind, she couldn't figure out his game plan. Yes, she knew he wanted out of his cell and he wanted the throne, but what did any of that had to do with her? Did he think he could use her to get Earth?

He stepped toward her ever so slowly. "That kind of _worked_ up?" he teased with a grin and a wink.

Toni found herself twitching again. Did he always think about sex? He was worse than she was, and that was saying something. "Yea, because I so want to have sex tied to this hard ass chair," she said, coldly.

"Not scared are you?" he asked, stepping every closer.

"Of you? You can't even touch me without phasing right through me," she replied. She may have been scared of Skully, but with her new found information, she knew she was safe for now. Loki wanted her alive for something, though that was a scary though.

"Want to bet?"

"So what stops me from changing my mind about the deal after I help you?" she asked, not wanting to think about him touching her.

Loki finally reached her, standing inches from her, as he stared down at her. "You'll find breaking one of my deals is harder than it seems."

"What are you? A crossroad demon?" There was something in his voice that told her that he wasn't being dramatic. "And you won't tell me what it is?" Toni asked, thinking about it. Maybe, she should.

"I'm not and no."

"And you swear it isn't illegal or breaking any laws of any realm," she asked.

"I swear," he said, looking rather pleased with himself.

She truly thought about it for a moment, because she was truly sick of his time, and Barnes' death was weighting on her. It made her wonder if there was anything else worse in life than that. What could she give him that was worse than that? She had no idea, but there was a part of her mind that was screaming at her, telling her that she would be an idiot to take his deal. And she was going to listen to that part of her.

If he had gone through all of this trouble with the stalker and the time travel (She had no doubt he was behind that somehow), what he wanted had to be something big. It had to be something that she wouldn't give up period if she knew. That had to be a reason. "Not my company," she said. "I won't give you that."

"I do not want Stark Industries."

"Good. Not giving you my suits either," she said, hoping to trick him somehow.

Loki glanced into her eyes. "I do not want your suits," he replied monotone.

"I am not-"

"Nice try, Stark, but I will not play this game with you."

Toni chuckled with a wink. "Can't blame a girl for trying." However, she still had no idea of what he wanted from her, or maybe, that was the point. Maybe, he just wanted to make her crazy… but would the point be in that? Did he get some kind of joy seeing her sweat? "But you can still let me go."

"Where would the fun be in that? I like to see you like this," he said, inching his face closer to her.

"Seeing me tried up? Interesting?" She said, trying to play it cool. She did not like him this closer to her, especially when she couldn't do anything. And if he was behind the stalker, she really had no interest of being this close to him at all.

Loki smiled. "I thought you liked to use rope in your love life?"

Toni laughed, as she looked pass his head, not wanting to meet his glance. "I never knew you paid any attention to my sex life," she said. "Geez, never knew I was important."

"Just take my deal and we can be off."

"Why d-" Just as Toni opened her month to turn him down again, the door to the oddly shape room flew open, silencing her. In came Skully and a few of his soldiers, and Loki disappeared as if he was never there. If she hadn't heard the Stalker say Loki's name, she would have thought she was imaging the fake god the whole time.

Skully waved his soldiers away as he noticed Toni was alert and glaring at him. "You're awake."

Toni struggled with the chains again as he eyed her. "I can't sleep all day long, now can I? I don't need that much beauty sleep," She replied, not taking his eyes off him. Judging by his movement, he was up to something, though he was always up to something.

"Surprise to see yourself here?" he asked, taking a few steps closer to her. He had his chest popped out and his arms folded behind his back to show his superiority.

She eyed him for a few seconds, trying to figure out what he wanted. "Surprise? Not so much, as no one can stay away from me for too long," Toni answered, putting on a brave face. She wasn't stupid and she knew how dangerous this man was. Even if Rogers was due to arrive to destroy this last Hydra base at any second, she knew she wasn't going to get out of this easy. This wasn't going to be a cake run by any means.

"You think highly of yourself," he said, stopping a few feet from her. He was looking at her with such disgust that it made Toni wonder how she was even alive.

"You must think so as well, since I'm live," she replied. She wiggled her fingers trying to keep her hands from going numb. She could barely feel her feet as it was. "Or do you have crush on me?" she said with a wink. "That's so cute, though I would most likely break your heart, well if you have a heart."

"No wonder Madame Hydra does not care for you," Schmidt said, as he crossed to the window.

Toni raised her eyebrow to that, wondering if Madame Hydra was the Female Commander that she loved so much. She had to be, because Toni doubted there were a lot of female soldiers in Hydra. "What kind of name is Madame Hydra? She couldn't think of a better name?" she joked.

"Your arrogance is exhausting," he said, glancing at the window.

"Good," she said, still struggling with her chains. Her fears were growing as she studied his stoic form. He was up to something and it wasn't going to be good.

He turned back to her ever so slowly with a look that could cut right through a brick wall. "Do I need to torture you again? I promise this time would be worse than the last."

Toni glared at him, knowing that she wouldn't be able to last another round of torture. "It's not going to change anything. I will never help you, Skully," she said.

"Skully?" He looked at her harshly and coldly. "You hold Captain America too high," he replied. "He will not be able to save you, Sark."

Though Toni was worried about Rogers as it seemed that Hydra knew about the future attack, it was a relief to be referred to as Sark. It meant that Schmidt did not know who she was, though it all could be a trick. "You know if he haven't been kicking your ass, I might believe you."

"He is not winning. I am simply buying my time," he said, crossing back to Toni and grabbing her face. He held her face tight, bruising her cheeks, as he forced her to look at him. "He can attempt to destroy this base, but he will only meet his end. Maybe, once I kill him in front of you, you will submit to me."

Toni wanted to laugh because she knew the future. She knew the outcome, but she couldn't bring herself to laugh as she noticed the murderous look in his eyes. He meant it. "I like it when you talk dirty," she said, drilling into his eyes. Madame Hydra had been correct that Toni used her words to hide, but she wouldn't admit that to anyone. She could barely admit that to herself.

Something in Schmidt snapped, and he shoved her head back, tiling the chair with her. Only thing keeping the chair up was his bruising grip on her face. "Maybe, once I break you, you will shut your mouth," he sneered.

The chair squealed as it wobbled on its back legs, and Toni thought it would break underneath her. "Me shut my mouth? But it's so pretty," she said, knowing that she should just shut her mouth. Every fiber in her body was telling her to shut up, but she was afraid to be quiet. She didn't know what he would do if she was.

Schmidt squeezed Toni's face harder. "If you weren't useful, I would kill you now."

"B…but your m-mystery third party wouldn't like that," she said, glaring at him. If he held her any tighter, he would break her jaw.

"So you know about that, do you?" he said, letting out of Toni's face. He stepped back from her and crossed to the tool that Loki was playing with earlier.

Toni tightened her jaw as she watched him pick up the tool and play with it. It turned out that it wasn't just a scoop as he squeezed it. She wasn't sure if he was going to use it on her, but she didn't like how easily he flipped in his hands.

He smirked as he turned and stepped back to her. "Quiet now?" he chuckled. "And here I want you to open your mouth."

She glared at the tool, which she could only image had been used on quite a few people. She had no idea what that device was possibly used for, but she knew whatever it was used for that it wasn't going to be pretty. "I never knew you liked my voice," she said, trying to keep up her brave front. "Your crush is getting out of control."

As if her words angered him, he crossed to her quickly grabbed her chin again. He forced her face up as he forced her mouth open. "I like your tongue so much that I want it," he said.

Toni tried to speak, but everything came out in mumbles as Schmidt was holding her mouth still. No matter how much she squirmed in his hand, the Red Skull was just too strong for her, and there was nothing she could do to break free of his grasp. Fear rose up inside of her as the tool inched closer and closer to her tongue. The idea of her tongue being ripped scared her to no end, and it wasn't about the not talking for the rest of her life.

"You don't need your tongue," he said, reaching the tool into Toni's mouth. The only thing she could do was try to move her tongue out of the way.

She was holding back the tears as she reached her breaking point. There wasn't anything else that she could do but sit there, and it was that realization that hit hard. There was some part of her that thought this was her fault, and there was another part of her that thought she deserved this. She let Barnes die without even trying to save him. What kind of person did that? A selfish person. There was no denying that she was a selfish person not caring about anyone else.

"I like you like this. I love the fear in your eyes," he said, as he finally gripped her tongue with the tool. However, before he pull, the door opened loudly behind him and judging by the footsteps, there were quite a few people who had just walked into the room.

"Get away from her!" A voice growled, startling Toni, who knew the voice from anywhere. She could hear him struggle as he tried to fight his way toward her.

Schmidt released Toni's tongue, dropped his arm, and backed slowly from her. "I thought I said I wanted to be left alone," he said coldly as he looked toward Madame Hydra, who had stepped in with quite a few hydra Soldiers.

"I thought you would like to see our guest," she said, stepping aside to reveal Rogers, who arms had been chained.

"Toni," Rogers called, still Struggling. "Toni."

Madame Hydra looked at the Captain before looking back to Schmidt. "He was easily captured. I expected more."

Toni glanced at Rogers, whose glance never let her, and she felt her fear raise up again. Why was he here? How did he get caught? Where was the rest of the Commandos? She felt herself shivered as she couldn't let anyone die because of her. She had done enough damage.

"Arrogance may not be a uniquely American trait, but I must say you do it better than anyone," Schmidt said, drawing Rogers' glance. "Did you think you can save her on your own?"

Rogers struggled harder. "Fight me and I can show you," he said through his teeth.

Madame Hydra laughed as she stepped toward Toni. "Does she really mean that much to you?" she asked, as she picked up her own metal torture device.

"Madame," Schmidt said with a warming tone.

"One less finger won't hurt," she said, stepping to Toni. The tool hanged dangerously from her hand.

Toni glanced up to the Commander, who stood directly in front of her and reached a hand toward her. She couldn't lie this time; this female Commander scared her more than the Red Skull, and Toni visibly flinched when she grabbed a piece of Toni's messy, dark black hair.

"Don't touch her," Rogers snapped, glaring at the woman as she twisted her fingers into Toni's hair. Knowing Toni well, he could recognize the fear in her eyes, and he didn't like it.

Schmidt turned to Captain America. "Why do you care so much for her? I doubt she cares as much for you as you do for her. She's probably using you like the fool that you are." He stepped closer to Rogers.

"Just keep talking. It doesn't matter what you say," Rogers said. He paused as he glanced toward Toni, who had stiffen as Madame Hydra continued to play with her hair. "You hadn't seen anything yet. If you think you won, you have another thing coming."

Toni glanced toward Skully and Rogers, wondering what Rogers was going on about. It sounded like he had a plan, though she had no idea of what kind of plan that could be. Getting captured couldn't be it.

"But there are limits to what even you can do, Captain. Or did Erskine tell you otherwise?" Schmidt said, glaring the Captain. It was quite clear that he wanted to kill the man in front of him and he would enjoy doing it.

Rogers responded with, "He told me you were insane."

"Insanity is a relative word," Madame Hydra said. She stepped away from Toni, pulling her hair harshly as she walked away. "Just kill him already."

Twitching in pain, Toni struggled in her restraints again, as she tried to pull her hair away from the crazy bitch. It wasn't until a few seconds later that the commander let go, and Toni let out the breath she was holding. After a deep breath, she turned to the Captain. She couldn't let this happen to Rogers… No, she couldn't let anything happen to Steve, her shrimp even if he wasn't her shrimp anymore. This was all her fault, and she couldn't let him die for her, but what could she do? She was tied to a chair, but she had her brain which was all she needed.

"Not let," Schmidt said. Steve let out a smile, which the mad man didn't like, and it only served to anger the man more. "Erskine resented my genius and tried to deny me what was rightfully mine. But he gave you everything. So, what made you so special?" Skully snapped.

"Nothin'. I'm just a kid from Brooklyn," Steve replied with a smile.

Schmidt turned from Rogers again and to Toni. "Or maybe, it was because of her."

Steve started to struggle again as Schmidt grabbed Toni's face. "What are you talking about?" he asked, his smile dying as his eyes were glued to the hand on Toni's face.

Mixed in Toni's fear was anger because she was tired of her face being grabbed. She glared to hide both her fear and to show her annoyance. She tried to pull her head back but his grip was too strong, and she was forced to look in his eyes.

Madame Hydra stepped toward Steve and said, "She knew they would pick you for the Super Soldier Project before you were picked."

Toni's heart raced as she wondered how much these people knew. How did they know about that? There was only one person who knew she knew and that was Salty. How did these people know that? Was her Stalker really that good? Or was it Loki? She highly doubted Phillips told them. "Get off," she yelled, still trying to fight Schmidt.

"You have no idea of how special she is," Schmidt said, his eyes drilling into her.

"I-if…I didn't think y-you had a crush...on me before, I do…n-now," she said, struggling to speak. "And he a-already knows… how special I am. Now, let… me go, Skully."

Schmidt squeezed tighter, making her yelp out in pain. "You should watch that mouth."

"I like her mouth," Steve replied, almost growling which drew Schmidt back to him.

"She will never love you," Schmidt replied in his face.

"Why do you care if she does?" the Captain asked. "What does it matter what I feel? Maybe, that's why Erskine thought I was special."

Schmidt responded with a fist to Steve's face, and Toni could only watch in horror as he repeatedly hit Steve. Being restraint and held back, Steve would do nothing to defend himself, and it sicken Toni as she had never seen him beaten like that. Steve was almost God like to her both in his strength and soul, and even with her never ending insults, she knew she could never break him. However, seeing Schmidt beat him was breaking her soul, and she wondered how much he could take or how much she could take. He could probably take more than anyone else, but she couldn't stand to see this. And she hated to admit this to herself, she might give into Skully to make him stop.

This beating seemed to last forever, and when Schmidt's hand came back bloody, she couldn't take anymore. "Stop," she yelled, which only caused Schmidt and Madame Hydra to laugh. "Stop! Just stop." She thrashed in her chair, bruising herself with each shake. She knew she was being stupid as she was tiring herself out and ruin any plan to escape.

"Or maybe, she does care," Schmidt said, not turning away from Rogers. "Imagine what she will do when I kill you."

Steve glanced Toni again and his glance softened. "You won't kill me. I can do this all day."

Schmidt narrowed his eyes as he crossed to a table and picked up a cube-energy pistol and pointed it at Steve. "Oh, of course you can. Of course. But unfortunately I am on a tight schedule."

Toni couldn't watch this, but there was nothing she could do. How could she lose Steve so close after losing Bucky? She wasn't sure how much of this she could take. "Steve," she muttered, fighting back the tears.

"So am I!" he said with a smirk, only sparing her a small glance.

Toni knew that smile from anywhere: Captain America had a plan. He had a real plan. She should have figured that Steve had a plan as he always had a plan. That was why they had so many fights in the future, because her first and only plan had always been attack, which he hated. And she always hated his plans, which always seemed to take too long, but right now, she was in love with his plans.

And a few moments later, she was really in love with his plan. At that exact moment, the windows in the lab shattered as zip lines were fired into the room, and seconds later, Rogers' man filled the room, engaging in a fight almost immediately. It was only a second later that Rogers broke free from the man holding him.

Everything was happening so fast that Toni was having a difficult time keeping up with everything. All she knew was that when Madame Hydra tried to get to her and Steve was there to stop the crazy commander. Toni had always been wowed by his strength, but to see him fight her off and chase her away was something else, and she didn't know what to make of it.

However, she could tell that they were winning. With the increasing ally forces, Schmidt and Madame Hydra were chased out of the room, as they headed toward an escape route. In this madness, Rogers made his way toward Toni, who was still struggling in her chains, and she couldn't hold back her smile. She thought she was going to watch him die.

When Steve reached her, he snapped the chains with ease, and Toni could only watch. Before she knew what happened and before she could act, he pulled her into his arms for a bear hug.

"Toni," he said into her hair line as he held her tight, and he held her for a few seconds before he spoke again. He pushed her back slightly to take a look at her, but he didn't let go. "Are you okay? Did they hurt you? Did you need any medical attention? Are you okay?" He was just rambling off so many questions that she couldn't possibly answered.

After getting over her shock of him pulling her into his arms, she relaxed into his warm arms. "Steve," she mumbled back, thinking she had sent him to his death. There was no way that she could deal with his death so soon after Bucky, and he wasn't supposed to die.

"You had me worried." He was staring at her intently and fully. "I'm going to beat him for touching you," he snapped. "I would do-"

She couldn't take it anymore, not right now. "Stop." She said forcefully. "Don't you ever die for me! Ever! You hear me? You're more important than I am."

Steve stared silently for a few seconds before he narrowed his eyes at her. "No, you stop, Toni," he said, almost yelling. "There aren't many things I agree with Schmidt about, but there is one. You're a special, and there's no denying that. Don't ever try. I don't want to hear it." His tone wasn't cold, but it wasn't exactly warm. He sounded annoyed.

"Steve…"

He glanced back to his men, before he looked back to her. "We don't have time to get into this, but I refused to let you do this to yourself. I'm not an idiot no matter how often you insult me. I know _everything,_ Toni." He said, stressing the word everything. "You don't need to hide."

Toni narrowed her eyes, because one, he didn't know everything. He just thought he did, and two, he did not know her, even if there was some truth to his words. He had no idea of what she was going through. "You're right," she started, staring at his face. "We don't have time for this. Go get them, Cowboy."

His facial expression morphed as Toni called him Cowboy. "I don't think I look like a Cowboy."

She rolled her eyes, not sure if he was joking or not. She hoped he knew she was joking and that he was joking with her, because if he didn't, she didn't know what to do with him. "You're joking, right?"

Rogers smiled as he squeezed her arm lightly. "If I'm the Cowboy, what does that make you?" he asked as he pushed himself to his feet.

"Don't you say it," she said through her teeth as he headed toward the door.

He pushed open the door before he looked back to her. "Fine. I won't say damsel in distress," he said with a laugh as he pushed through the door before she could say anything.

At first, Toni just stared off as she was in total disbelief, not believing that he had said that to her. Did he really say that to her? Did he really make a joke? Was the world coming to an end? There was no way this was her Captain America. He didn't joke.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

With Morita and a few unnamed soldiers trailing behind her, Toni made her way toward the control room to see if she could find anything out. After finding her device and making sure it was still function, some time had passed and she had no idea of how the battle was going. Plus she had no idea what happened to Schmidt. Did he get away? As she hated this not knowing, she was on a mission to find out what was going on. She couldn't let anything happen that wasn't supposed to happen, and that would include making sure that nothing happened to Steve.

After making it to the control room, Toni took a seat at the control panel and started to touch things in a random pattern, trying to make something happen. There were so many random and weird switches that Toni didn't know what to make of them, and she couldn't figure out any logical behind anything. However, there was one thing about Toni that she couldn't deny: at times, she was the luckiest person on the planet and she was lucky then. She was able to hit the right switch and was able to find a video feed.

However, seeing Peggy pull Steve back and give him a kiss wasn't what Toni was looking for, and she would not admit it that she felt relieved when Steve pulled away quickly. Why did Peggy think it was necessary to kiss him? Was she afraid that Steve wasn't coming back? There were some doubt in Toni's mind, but she wasn't going to think about that. She was going to be her cocky self, who believed in the awesome power of herself.

Shaking her head, Toni cleared her mind and turned her attention to the monitors. Though she knew she shouldn't, she was going to do her best to help these soldiers win this battle, as they weren't going to lose because of her. Having a bird eye view of the base with the cameras, she was going give them support that they needed.

On one of the monitors, Toni noticed the Female Commander, or rather 'Madame Hydra,' which Toni still though was a lame nickname, trying to sneak out unnoticed. She watched the Commander for a second, wondering briefly what this woman was up to. Did she realize that the battle was lost and she wanted to escape before they lost? Was she not loyal to Hydra? Toni wouldn't blame her for that one, since Toni wouldn't want to be loyal to that group either, as they would probably shot you when you weren't looking.

She got to her feet and headed to the door, wanting to follow the Commander, but she never got passed the door. Morita was standing in front of the door, blocking her exit. "You make such a great door," Toni teased, when he wouldn't move.

"Where are you going?" he asked, eyeing her.

"There's something odd, and I wanted to check it out," she said, not wanting to explain that she wanted to chase after a crazy, super strong Commander, who could knock her out in one punch.

"Why don't you stay here? The team could use you here," he said, as he glanced out the door.

Toni knew he was correct and she was being stupid; however, she could help but think she was missing her shot by not going after Madame Hydra. She knew that woman knew something, but it was stupid to think she could get anything out of her. "I know," she said, exhaling slowly.

"Then what is it?"

"Something is bugging me," she admitted as she crossed back to the control panel. It would be pointless to fight with him and she knew this.

"Like what?" he asked.

Toni shook her head, not wanting to explain what was going on in her brain. It was a crazy place in there and she had a difficult time understanding it herself. With a deep breath, she responded, "I don't know yet." She didn't know what Loki wanted, and she had to find out what. She didn't know what Madame Hydra was up to and she wanted to know what. However, they had to deal with Schmidt first, who Steve had followed onto the strange aircraft.

* * *

 

*O*O*

* * *

 

Listening to Peggy as she spoke to Steve was heartbreaking, and Toni didn't know how she held back the tears. To hear Steve sound so broken was almost too much for Toni, who didn't understand why this was so hard. Her heart felt like it was about to break and shatter. She knew that Steve wasn't going to die, and he would be back, but it felt like he was dying. It felt like the end.

"There's not going to be a safe landing. But I can try and force it down," Steve said, his voice coming through the radio. It was a little hazy, but they could understand him.

Peggy looked like she was hit by a train. "I'll get Howard on the line, he'll know what to do."

"There's not enough time. This thing's moving too fast and it's heading for New York," He replied.

Peggy practically jumped to her feet as she turned to Toni, who was standing back against the wall. Toni wanted to give Peggy a chance to say good bye as this would be the last time she would see Rogers, while Toni would see him soon. "What about Toni!" She said, as she crossed to Toni and pulling Toni to the radio. "She can help."

Toni reluctantly let Peggy pull her, because she knew she couldn't help. She had to let Steve go down, even if she wondered what would change if he didn't. Maybe, the world would be a better place. Maybe, she should help. Sure, he was useful during the battle of New York and his leadership had saved them, but she didn't think that they couldn't handle it without him. Plus, it wasn't like he was going away. He would still be there, just old, which would be funny and Toni would love to see that as she danced around him. "Yea, I should be able to help," she said, shakily into the microphone. "There is nothing that I can't do. You know me."

"No," Steve protested strongly, stunning Toni and Peggy.

When Steve first called requested to speak with Peggy, Toni tried not to feel jealous, but it was hard, and now it was really difficult. She didn't understand why he was rejecting her help. Was it something that Schmidt had said? Did he not trust her?

"Steve," Peggy muttered.

"…There's not enough time. This thing's moving too fast and it's heading for New York," he said. There was a bit of hesitation in his voice. "I gotta put her in the water."

This was when Toni stepped back and away from Peggy, who was breaking in front of the genius. "Please, don't do this. We have time. We can work it out," the Agent begged.

"Right now I'm in the middle of nowhere. If I wait any longer, a lot of people are gonna die-" Steve started, but Toni was no longer paying attention. If he didn't want to talk to her, then there was no point in her listening to his speech. She was sick of his self-sacrificing way, and she couldn't deal with it anymore. If he wanted to be stupid, then so be it, but why did he have to be like this? Why did he always do this? Was it because he thought he was prefect? Did it all go back to that? Was it something else?

Shaking her head, Toni left the control room to give them some space, and it wasn't like either of them wanted her there. If they were saying goodbye, they would need some time to themselves and she was going to give them that. Not knowing where to go, Toni just stood outside of the control room and stared at Phillips who standing across from her. He was giving her a look. "Hey, Salty," she said weakly.

"I'm surprised to see you here, as I thought you left with that device of yours," he said, looking her over. "No offense, but you look like crap."

Toni let out a small chuck. "I look better than Agent Sassy Pants in there," She said, looking back at the door. "I think she's going through the ringer."

"I think you are."

She looked him over and he looked just as tired as she felt. "I'm fine," she said. "Besides, I think we have other things to do than talk about our feelings." There was some bitterness in her tone that she couldn't hold back. She didn't understand his need to talk about her emotions, which she didn't want to acknowledge.

Salty stepped to the door to check on Peggy, who was now crying into the microphone as she was calling out Steve's name repeatedly. Phillips took a deep breath as he turned back to Toni and let out a slowly sigh. He stood there in silence, thinking, and it wasn't until a few seconds later that he spoke. "I never realize how much I liked Rogers until right now. He was a fine man."

Toni turned him, eyeing him. Maybe, she should tell them where the plane went down. She could tell how much Steve meant to all of them. Maybe, Steve would be happier in this time with his friends and…Peggy. Maybe, that was why she was here in the first place. Maybe, it was fate's way of telling her that she should change the future. Maybe, it would be for the best. "He…was," she said, stumbling over the word was.

"Did you know about this?" There was no judgment in his voice.

"I…knew something was going to happen, not when or how," she admitted. It was the truth. She had no idea of how Rogers turned into a Popsicle.

"And are you okay?"

"Peachy." She replied as she stepped toward the door and glanced at Peggy, who had fallen to her knees. It was a truly sadness sight to see Peggy crying on the floor and Toni had no idea of what to do. She was never good at comforting someone in pain. Should she leave Peggy alone? Should she go to her? What should she say?

"Let's leave her be," Phillips said, grabbing Toni's arm lightly. "There're a few things to wrap up here."

Toni turned to him, suddenly remembering Madame Hydra. "There's this female Commander. She knows something!" She knew it might be foolish to tell him as that woman did know things, but she had to find her. "We must find her."

"A few of my men had run into a female soldier, but they were no match for her, and she escaped, which is quite impressive."

"Fuck," Toni cursed, not taking her eyes off Peggy, who hadn't move from her spot on the ground. It pulled at her heart strings and it also made her feel like shit. She could stop Peggy's pain if she just told her the truth, and it was hard not to. Why purpose would it serve to keep quiet?

"Whatever you are going to do don't," he said, strongly.

"I wasn't going to do anything," she replied, quickly. However, she could tell he was not buying it at all with that look of his. "I'm not." She wasn't sure yet if that was a lie or not.

Phillips took a deep breath as he shook his head. "Come with me. Let's give Agent Carter some space," he said. "We could use that brain of yours to decipher this shit."

Toni gave him a look as she stepped away from the door. "You're just trying to keep me busy." She knew what he was doing and she didn't care for it. She wasn't a child who needed to be watched.

"I am, but that doesn't change the fact that we don't know what half of these things do."

"Fine," she said, annoyed; however, she couldn't keep her mind off Peggy and whether she should tell them were Steve was located. Maybe, he would want her to…Toni didn't know if he would, but her guilt was getting the best of her, and she wondered when she would snap. It would only be a matter of time before she did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know Madame Hydra is also known as Viper, but she didn't take that name under after her time in Hydra. I am not sure if I used her properly and if I didn't, I am sorry. I am not all too knowledge on the comic world, but I have done research, though it may not have been enough.
> 
> Anyhow, I hope you liked the chapter.
> 
> Also, I am playing with the idea of Howard finding out about Toni. What do you guys think?


	25. The Changing Tide

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to mention that Marvel is blowing me mind. I also think that Marvel's plan is to take all of the actors and don't leave DC with any to choose from.
> 
> Here you. Let me know what you think.

**Chapter 25:**

**The Changing Tide**

* * *

Being frozen in ice for seventy plus years was a numbed experience in which he didn't feel a thing. It just went by in a blink of eye and he felt nothing. It was complete and utter nothing. He didn't dream, he didn't think. It wasn't even known if he was alive during that time. How could he have been alive? He was frozen; how could a body survive such harsh temperatures? No one should have been able to survive that, but he wasn't just anything one. He was a soldier… and not just any soldier. He was Captain Steven Rogers, a super soldier with unknown strengths and weakness; however, it seemed one of his strengths was that he could survive extreme temperatures for decades.

After he was thawed, his brain didn't snap back right away and his dreams took a few days (or what felt like days) to return. There was no real way to tell when his mind snapped back to his body and when he began to feel once again, but it all came back to him. His dreams were not of Agent Peggy Carter, the one of three women he had ever been kissed by and the last woman he had kissed. When his dreams came back, they were of Corporal Toni Sark, a woman he had kissed once, a woman he didn't know a lot about; however, he was completely in love with her.

His heart binged when he thought of how he had rejected her after Bucky's death because of Phillips' advice. He told – no… more like ordered Steve not to start a relationship with her, which Steve didn't like. Sure, the Colonel had a point and there was no need for love in war, but he had no right to order him not to start a relationship. But before he could snap, Phillips told Steve that she needed time, that he shouldn't attempt a relationship with her. He told him that he should honor Barnes, his best friend, and just be a friend to Toni. After seeing how broken she was after she learned of Bucky's death, he had known Phillips was right.

So before Toni could even come up with the idea, he shot her down as gently as he could. He played up his non-relationship with Peggy, which wasn't fair to Peggy. At first, he thought he had imagined the pain in Toni's eyes as it disappeared in a blink of an eye but later he could see how crushed she was. It completely crushed him to see her like that, but it had to be done. She was in enough pain; she couldn't handle anything else. It also wouldn't have been right. She was his best friend's dame, even if he saw her first.

However, seeing how badly he hurt Peggy when he went under, it was a good thing that he did reject Toni. Listening to Peggy as she cried, it almost broke him, and if it would've been Toni, he would've surely died listening to her breaking. She, a woman who never opened up to anyone, wouldn't have withstood another blow to heart and he was glad that he didn't break her heart more than it had to be, though it didn't protect _his_ heart. As he was going down, there was only one person he wanted to talk to and it wasn't Peggy. His heart ached to talk to Toni but he couldn't and he knew it. It was the worst feeling in the world and at the last second before he hit the ice, he wondered if he had made the right choice in not pursuing her.

When his dreams came back to him, his desires came to life and all he thought about was her. All he thought about was righting that wrong; sure, Phillips was right then, but now, he was wrong. When he awoke and he would wake up, he would find Toni and he would kiss her like she had never been kissed before. She needed to know how he felt.

The first thing that came to mind when he woke up was her and then the rest of the world. This room, this strange room, was the last thing he thought about. He needed to see Toni. "Where am I?" he asked the Agent staring at him. The radio was on, broadcasting a baseball game.

"You're in a recovery room in New York city," she stated with a smile. She was a pretty woman, but he wanted to see Toni.

There was something off about this room, which didn't look quite right. "Where am I really?" he asked, suspiciously. Toni should've been here; she wouldn't have left him here alone, not after what happened. Peggy wouldn't have left him either.

"I'm afraid I don't understand." She was scared of him and it showed but she forced a smile onto her face. She took a step back to put some distance between them. She had something in her hand and she held it tight.

He knew this baseball game. "The game, it's from May 1941. I know because I was there." Steve replied sharply as he got to his feet. "Now, I'm gonna ask you again. Where am I?" He took a step toward her.

"Captain Rogers?" Her fear was growing.

"Who are you? Where's Toni?" he asked. If she knew he was alive, she would be here with him like she always was when he needed her. She would be here, telling him what was going on.

The agent didn't have time to answer as two heavy armed men came rushed into the room from the door behind the woman. He stared at them for a few seconds, unsure of what was going on. These men looked strange, wearing full blacks, and their uniform looked like nothing he had seen before. Even the HYDRA uniform didn't look like that.

As they approached him, his mind kicked into full gear, and they would need more than just two soldiers to stop him.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Steve had no idea of what was going on or where the hell he was. First, he woke up in a fake room which couldn't hold a regular officer, let alone a super soldier. Second, the building that he was held in didn't look like any kind of building that he had ever seen. It was all futuristic. Thirdly, when he walked out of building and onto the streets, he had no idea of where he was. Sure, he recognized streets signs and he knew he was in New York, but this didn't look like the city he had grown up in. There were so many flashing lights and movie screens displaying ads at a rapid pace, which he didn't even think was possible. How was that possible?

He couldn't even think as he just stared off in disbelief. The honking cars or a crowd of loud people, who were staring at him, didn't draw his attention. None of that mattered to him. He couldn't get his head around what was going on, but he didn't get time to think as black cars circled him, blocking his escape. Even the cars were of nothing that he had ever seen before.

"At ease, soldiers!"

Shaking his head, Steve turned to a man who had stepped out of one of the vehicles and was walking toward him. He looked like a man who had seen a great deal of things and deserved respect, but Steve wasn't sure if he wanted to give that to him just yet. He looked like one of those men from the fake room.

"Look, I'm sorry about that little show back there… but we thought it best to break it to you slowly," said the man with the eye patch.

"Break what?"

"You've been asleep, Cap. For almost seventy years," said the man. He took another step toward him.

Steve didn't know what to say to that. How could that be true? Was it something to do with the Serum? He didn't know, but it all too much for him to take. He closed his eyes as he tried to block out the world around him. It had to be true, right? That was only one thing that could explain what was going on around him.

Rogers took a deep breath as he tried to convince himself. But before he could calm himself fully, his mind drifted to Toni, and his heart just shattered. He had left her. He had left her to suffer seventy years alone. She could've died alone, like she always had been. He had promised himself when he first met her that he wasn't going to allow that to happen. How could he have allowed that to happen?

The eyed him before he said, "Are you going to be okay?"

Steve glanced to the man, as everything for him came crashing down. Toni wasn't there, because she couldn't have been here. She was gone. Gone from him forever and it broke him. Maybe, Phillips was right. "Yeah, yeah. I just had a…" He drifted off because he didn't know what he had. He had told himself that he wanted to see Toni to tell her everything, but he couldn't do that now and he didn't know what to do now.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Steve knew he had to get her off his mind or he was going to go crazy, if he wasn't already crazy. However, if he didn't know what happened to her, he would go crazy anyway. He had to at least find out what had happened to her as it would be the only thing that would settle his mind. He had to make sure she was happy. He just had to. He didn't know what he would do if he found out she wasn't.

He took a deep breath. "I don't know if I want you off my mind, Toni," he muttered as he laid his head on the table. Thinking about her also kept him sane as well. He didn't know if he should believe everything that Directory Nick Fury had told him, though it would be hard to disprove. Though it didn't matter if it was true, she was his focus point, his anchor.

He took a deep breath as he didn't even have a photo of her to remember her beautiful face or smart ass mouth. He had to settle for a damn drawing which didn't do her justice. He had no idea of where he could get a picture—or how to find out what had happened to her. He didn't know where to start; he couldn't look her up in the damn phone book. He did, however, ask Fury if he knew what happened to the officers who were involved in the SSR, and on request, Fury handed over the personal folders, which were laid out in front of him.

Steve didn't know if he wanted to look at these folders; it was one thing to _think_ everyone he knew was dead. It was another to _know_ that they were dead. He took a deep breath as he opened the first folder and gazed. It was of Howard Stark- deceased, and that completely shocked him. How did the genius die? How was that possible? Steve though he out live them all. The folder shook in his hands as he tried to force himself to read it, but he couldn't. He just couldn't. It would be too much.

Unable to look at the details, he flipped to another file which was of Colonel Phillips- also deceased. It was a blow to his heart to see so many of his comrades dead. Again unable to look, he flipped to see Peggy and to his joy, she was still alive and living in England. There was a number listed for her, and for a second, he wanted to call her, but he couldn't do that to her. She had gotten over his death and he was going to allow her that peace.

He quickly turned the folder, finding the folders for the commanders. To his delight, not all of them were dead, but at the same time it didn't bring him joy. Even if they were alive, they were lost to him and it would be wrong to contact them after all of this time, though he was tempted by it. They would know what happened to Toni, whom had been close to a few of them. He took a deep breath knowing that he couldn't do that because that would be selfish of him. Heck, he shouldn't need to ask them as it should be in one of their folders.

Steve flipped pass their pages, looking for Toni's folder, but her folder wasn't here. Making sure he hadn't missed anything, he looked through the folders again, but it wasn't there. _It has to be here!_ He thought to himself. It just had to be there; there was no way that it wouldn't be there. Fury had stated these files were all the personnel involved with the SSR, so it had to be here. So he looked for the file yet again, but it was nowhere to be found. He took a deep breath, as he tried to calm himself but his anger had gotten the best of him, and he hurled the files across the room. He watched as the pages flew everywhere, landing everywhere.

"Fury must've missed one," he said while huffing. Maybe, he did it on purpose, but why would he do that? Maybe, Fury knew how affected he would be by it; however, that didn't make sense. No one knew how he felt about her. No one besides Philips. If he did know, Steve didn't know what the reason would be, but he would ask the Director about it.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

"You missed a personnel file," Steve stated as he marched behind Fury, his eyes drilling into the back of Fury's head.

Fury stopped and moved aside as not to disrupt the flow of traffic in SHIELD headquarters, an impressive building if it could be considered as just a building. It was much more than a building. It was far more advanced than anything else on the planet. "I'm not sure what you're implying but I feel insulted, Captain Rogers," he said.

Steve glanced around, noticing a few eyes on him. He wondered briefly if they knew who he was. "I didn't mean to insult you, Director Fury," he said. "The file that I'm looking for wasn't included in the case."

"What are you looking for?" he asked, eyeing him.

With a deep breath, Steve glanced around, eyeing anyone who came close. As they were in the lobby (or what Steve thought was the lobby), there was a lot of foot traffic, and there were a lot of ears around. Steve, who was unsure of what he doing or where he was going, had no clearances and was stuck to the lobby only, even if he wanted to get away from the crowd for privacy. His eyes flicked to the SHIELD's logo in the center of the room and stayed focused on it.

Fury followed his glance. "I understand you're going through a lot right now, Rogers, and I can't imagine what' running through your head," he stated. "If you need a mission to get you back into things, I can-"

"I need that file. That's all I need." Steve turned to him, annoyed. He didn't need a mission-well maybe not now.

"I gave you all the files," Fury said.

"No, you didn't." Why couldn't he understand that he had missed one?

"Which file are you looking for?" Fury asked, eyeing Rogers. "If you're looking for some kind of peace, this won't help you. Knowing that all of your comrades are deceased will only serve to taunt you."

He was sick of people telling him what to do. Why couldn't Fury just give him what he wanted without a lecture? Yes, he understood that he was only taunting himself, but he would be haunted even without the file. He couldn't even close his eyes without seeing the battlefield; he couldn't see anything but bloodshed. "I just need the file on Toni Sark. She worked closely with Howard Stark."

Fury narrowed his eyes. "I don't consider myself an expert in everything, though there're only a few things I don't know. Really only a few things," he replied, annoyed. "But there was no Toni Sark, who worked with the SSR."

Steve shook his head. "Maybe, she was borrowed from somewhere…another department," he said, trying to think of something. Toni had to come from somewhere… but she had lied to him before. Maybe, she was lying about that, but there was no way that she could've fooled Phillips.

"There's only one Toni that I'm aware of and that's Toni Stark, but I highly doubt she was involved in the SSR."

The Super Soldier froze, unable to process that new info. How in the hell did Howard marry Toni, when she couldn't even stand to be in the same room as him? Yes, she was less hostile to him as time went on, but there was no way that she would've married him. She just wouldn't have. _Or_ _you just want her sad and miserable,_ he thought, angry at himself. He didn't like the idea of her marrying Howard at all. "Why is that?" asked Steve. "Maybe, it's the last name thing. Maybe, you looked up the wrong last name."

Fury stared at him, confused. "I didn't. Miss Stark wasn't even born in the 1940's. She's Howard Stark's daughter."

"I…I don't understand," Rogers replied slowly. Nothing was making sense to him. Why would Howard name his child after Toni? Did she leave a lasting imagine with him? However, why couldn't Fury find a Toni Sark in his record?

Fury took a deep breath. "Wait here."

Steve didn't say anything as he watched Fury disappear through a door that he couldn't follow him through. He just stared at the glass doors, wondering why Fury left. What did that man want to show him? He wasn't even sure that he trusted this man. Why would he? This man showed up and told him nothing. There was no proof that he could trust him, besides the fact that he was a part of SHIELD which evolved from the SSR.

It was only ten minutes later that Fury returned with another folder, a newer folder than the ones that Fury had given him before. "Here's Toni Stark's folder. I don't know what you're looking for, but you won't find it with her. She won't be that anchor to the past for you."

Steve took the folder. "Thanks," he said, adding nothing else. He didn't want or have any interest in talking to Fury about what was going on in his head; heck, he wasn't sure what was going on in his head. Everything was spinning and he couldn't make heads or tails of anything. However, a part of what Fury said did rang to him, because he _was_ looking for an anchor. He was looking for Toni, though he didn't know if this 'Toni Stark' would be helpful. Why would she be?

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Steve, fighting his negative thoughts, didn't look at the file until he had gotten back to his small messy apartment. He usually was very organized as messes weren't tolerated in the army, but he couldn't find the urge to clean up the tossed files on the floor. Those files were painful reminders to something that he had lost to the hands of time. It weighted heavily on his mind that he was the alone, which was probably why he was pushing so hard to find Toni. _You could always go see Peggy,_ he thought. He closed his eyes, thinking about all of the pain that he had put her through, and he couldn't do that to her. Maybe, once he got head screwed on right, he might go see her. Right now, he wasn't stable.

Taking a seat at the same table from earlier, he opened the file and dropped it immediately. The woman in the photo was Toni, _his_ Toni, but how could that be? How could Toni Sark be Toni Stark? Sure, if Toni Stark was older, he could see it, but she wasn't old enough to have been alive in the 1940's. "I don't understand," he muttered to himself. Did Fury mixed up the photos when he gave him Stark's folder? He had to have had… But the photo didn't look old.

He tried to argue with himself, saying she wasn't his Toni; this Toni Stark was someone who looked like his Toni. It wasn't uncommon for people to look alike. _But how could've Howard known that his future daughter would look like Toni? Is it just a coincidence?_ He shook his head, because this couldn't have been a coincidence. There was no way that Howard would have known his daughter would look exactly like Toni.

"I don't understand," he snapped, as he looked through the file, which was thicker than the others. He went cold at another picture of this Toni Stark, who had the same glow in her chest that his Toni had. They also had the same height, though Steve wasn't sure how he knew Toni's height. "Snap out of it," he told himself as he stared at the picture, his focus on the glow, which haunted him. "It can't be her, but it has to be. She wouldn't look that young. Maybe…." He shook his head. Nothing he came up with made sense.

Maybe she was a goddess or something which would explain why she looked so young. Maybe, she didn't age and Howard took her in to hide her identity. "Now, I'm going crazy," he told himself, shaking those thoughts out of his mind. He flipped a page and started at Toni's biography, hoping that would give him some answers. The word torture popped out at him, which reminded him of something that Toni told him before about being tortured.

"Was this how she had been tortured?" he asked. "But that doesn't make sense. She was tortured before I met her, but this was only a few years ago." Unable to finish reading all of the horrible things those Ten Ring bastards did to her, he balled up the pager and threw it as hard as he could. This had been the torture that she had talked about, but how could that be? It didn't make any sense.

Steve picked up a photo of Toni in which she was smirking at the camera. He remembered that smile; at first, he couldn't stand it, but it had grown on him. He loved how confident she was, how sure she was. He loved that she knew how to handle herself, even if she made him worried. "How can you be the same Toni?" He felt himself relax, and that was when something popped out at him.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

He had told himself that he wouldn't see them until he was ready, but he needed to know, and it wasn't as if he went to see Peggy. He had tracked down Dum Dum in a nursing home, who he seemed to be enjoying as he bugged all of the female nurses. Though guys who flirted nonstop annoyed him, it was adorable to see old man Dugan flirt with women half his age; however, it could get annoying after a while. It had to do something with the fact that no one could be mad at an elderly man.

"Dugan," Steve called standing a few feet from Dum Dum, who was joking around with another resident. They were in the common room of the Nursing home, which was filled with visiting family, other residents, and nurses. Dugan and his friend were eyeing one of a female nurses, who was currently assisting another resident.

Dum Dum Dugan turned him, completely shocked. "Rogers?" he asked, trying to push himself up. It looked like he was seeing a ghost as the color drained from his face. "I'll be damned."

"You don't have to get up," Steve started as he took a seat next to him. He stared at him, shocked at how old he looked. He knew seventy years had passed, but it was shocking to see Dugan like this with his hair thinning and turning into different shades of whites and grays. A used cane discolored from years of use sat a few feet from Dugan ready to be used. "How are you doing?"

"I'm seeing a ghost," he said, just staring at him.

Steve smiled, trying to mask the pain of seeing him like this. Would it be this hard with all of his friends? "It's a long story. I came to see how you're doing."

Dugan smiled, still shocked. "Is it really you? You look so young."

"The Serum," he replied. "And there was some ice."

"You could always do things that we could not," he cheered, eyeing a female nurse. "Oh, look its Nancy. I like Nancy."

Steve turned and watched the nurse called Nancy as she was filing some paper. She glanced up and their eyes met, bringing a blush to his face. She smiled, finding him attractive, as he found her attractive. She was pretty, but she wasn't Toni pretty, who could look pretty in anything. He loved the way Toni looked when she wore a baggy engineering jumper covered in oil with her hair in a messy bun. He loved how happy she got when she was working on something. Nancy's smile couldn't compete with hers. No one's could.

"You can't have Nancy. Nancy is mine, Rogers," Dugan stated, watching him.

"No, she's mine," his fellow resident stated from behind him.

"No, Tom. She's mine."

Steve laughed. "I'm not interested."

"Good," Dugan stated. "Why are you here, Steve?" He was eyeing Steve, belief still in his eyes. "I'm know it isn't to catch up, though I would like that. You can pretend to be my grandson and help me with these ladies."

Steve watched as Tom was wheeled away by some male orderly, telling him that he needed to take some pills. It wasn't until the elderly man was gone that he spoke up. He didn't want to talk in front of him. "Toni Sark."

Dugan smiled. "I should have figured."

"Why is that?"

"Everyone thought she was Barnes' girl, but in fact she was yours. She always was. I knew during the poker game when she lit up at the sight of you. It just wasn't the right time."

Steve warmed at that. "I'm trying to figure out what happened to her. I know that–"

Dugan put a hand up to stop him. "My mind slips and at times, I don't remember what I had for dinner, but I…" He drifted off leaving Steve to wonder if he had fallen asleep. He watched him in silence until Dugan spoke again, "Have you heard of Toni Stark?"

That name stuck him hard. Did he know? "Yes."

Dugan grabbed his cane and used it to push himself up. "And how they look alike?"

Steve reached his hands out to catch Dugan if he were to fall. It struck him how old Dugan was as he looked like he was going to fall over at any second. He didn't know how he could handle the fact that all of his friends and allies were either dead or close to death like Dugan. He couldn't watch them die. "Yes."

"It's because they're the same person."

"I…" There was a pause. "But how? I… don't understand," he spoke, looking down at his hands. "I was playing around–"

Dugan shook his head as he stepped away. "Not in public. People already think I'm a crazy old man, which I am, and many not believe it if they hear but they don't need to hear this," he said, leading Steve down a long hallway. It was a lengthy, painfully slow walk for both of them: for Dugan, his weak, old bones ached with each movement. His cane could barely support his weight, but he refused to sit.

For Steve, he walked behind Dugan ready to catch the old unstable man, who looked like he would fall over. Steve didn't think he had ever walked this slowly before and it boggled the mind that someone could walk this leisurely. He eyed Dugan swaying form, unable to get over how old and close to death he was. "So tell me how–"

"Time travel," Dugan answered, still shocked himself.

Steve had come to that conclusion on his own, but it was hard for him to grasp that. "I don't –"

"You don't need to understand. You just need to comprehend that you can't tell or see her."

"What?" Steve asked shocked. How did he know that he was planning on seeing her? And why didn't Dugan want him to see her? "I was –"

Dugan turned to him and gave him the look. "I know that look of yours and what you're planning, but you can't," he warned, taking a seat in a lone chair by a window. "She can't know she went to the past until she goes to the past. You can change everything if you go to her."

"I can see her without telling her."

"And how will you explain it, Steve? How will you walk into her life? She won't know you. Plus, she isn't the same person you met in the past yet. Trust me on that. Trust me."

Steve knew he was right, but it hurt to hear him say it. He didn't want to leave her alone; he finally found her, and he wanted to see her, hold her, kiss her, and never let her go again. And this time, they might have a chance. "How did you figure that out?" he asked. He wanted to protest and say that he could go and see Toni without changing the past.

"Howard did. Back in the lab before you vanished, Toni jokingly told him that, but he didn't figure it out after you disappeared. However, we didn't find out until after she was born and we wondered why he named his daughter after Toni," he said. He tried to laugh but it came out as a cough. "He puffed out his chest like a proud father and gloated that his daughter would invent time travel."

Steve could see Howard doing that. "And he just told you?"

"Well, he told all of us to not say anything, but it was odd seeing her grow up."

Steve closed his eyes, envisioning Toni as a small child. "I bet."

"Growing up, Peggy and her were close," Dugan said with a smile. "They were cute together."

"If you guys saw her, why can't I?" He was jealous.

"It's one thing to be introduced to her, but you can't just walk up to her. Steve, you can't. You have to wait until she comes back from the past and you can't tell anyone. I need you to promise me this." He took a deep breath. "I know it'll be hard for you, knowing how much you care for her, but you can't. If your paths meet, then so be it, but you can't go to her. Promise me this."

Every part of his body was telling him not to promise that. His very breath was taken away from him at the very thought of not seeing her again, and it made his heart ache. However, he knew Dugan was right. He had to stay away from her, because if he didn't, he could change the whole time line, though he wasn't sure how much of the time line would be different since she messed it up in the first place. "I promise."

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

It was harder to stay away from Toni than he had expected, because her face was everywhere and every time he saw it, he was drawn to it. If he saw her face on a magazine, he had to buy it. If she was in a newspaper, he had to read it. If he heard her name on the street, he had to stop and listen. He had to bring to sketchbook with him wherever he went in case the urge to draw forced it way up to the surface. So far, it had happened quite a few time and each picture was of Toni in different poses; the last pose was her in one of those weird suits that she had created. He had seen a video of her flying in the suit and he couldn't help but draw it as she seemed so free flying.

Steve, with sketchbook open to a blank page, was seated outside a small café in Manhattan. Not a second passed without a person walking past him, and it was about every five seconds that a woman walked by him smiling. Even in old, bland, out of fashion clothes, Steve was still attractive young man, who stood out in a crowd. Though he wasn't an expert in women in any sense, he knew he was attractive and he could get any woman he wanted… well besides the one he wanted.

Here he was just a few yards from Stark Tower, waiting for her to drive or flew by. The waitress made a note about that being common when she noticed him staring at the building. She smiled and walked away not realizing that he was waiting for something more. He ignored the man at the next table telling him to ask for her number, which Steve didn't want at all. He knew seeing another Dame –no, woman –would probably (not) help him get over Toni, but he couldn't even think of going out with another woman.

Shaking his head, he picked up his pencil and started to draw the building, which was striking compared to everything else around it. To him like other buildings around the city, it was an ugly building, but it stuck out to him, drawing him in. It was something that she created.

"You need to get out," he told himself. He needed to get out, back into the world, though he didn't know how he would do that. He had no idea of where to begin; he could take up Fury's offer, but the idea of going on a mission without his commandos was painful. He wouldn't even know how to go on a mission without them, and did the world really need him? They lasted this long without a Captain America, so why would they need him now?

The world had changed so much in the last seventy years and he doubted they would need an old man like himself. They didn't need an old worn out symbol; they just wanted power and frame. There was another reason why he listened to Dugan when he told him to stay away from Toni. He was afraid that she wouldn't want him now, even if she did remember him. He was old fashion and outdated and she was not. _Stop thinking that,_ he yelled at himself, slamming his pencil down.

The drawing, almost completed, had an angry line drawn through it, caused by him throwing his pencil down. The tower was missing the name Stark that the real tower had, but the sketch had a shadow in one of the top windows that he envisioned Toni to be standing at looking over the city. He could see a smile on her face, happy at her work. She was always happy at her work.

He picked up the pencil again to add streets signs and other small details, but he dropped it a second later when he realized where he was. This ugly building was located in the same spot that he had found Toni bloody and injured, calling out for help. This was where it all happened. This was the spot that she traveled back in time, though there was no way to tell if this was when she did so.

Steve stood suddenly, as that promise he made went out the window. He wasn't sure what he was going to do, but maybe, he could stop her from going back in time; however, there was no telling what that would do. _It would stop me from loving her,_ he thought, which took his breath away. He couldn't imagine himself not loving her, and it could change the past completely and they could end up losing the war. They had to have won the war before she interfered, right?

His mind wandered back to that cold dark night when he found her; he thought she was going to die from her injures. Even then when he didn't know who she was, he hated seeing her like that; his heart ached from the sight. He wanted to save her from that pain, but he couldn't. He knew he couldn't and he knew he couldn't stop his own pain either.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

"Trying to get me back in the world?" Steve asked, sending another punch to the worn out punching bag. He kept having flashbacks of the war, of his commandos, of Toni's face when she watched him run off. He hadn't realized at the time that she had been scared, that she didn't want him to go, but he could see it in her eyes as he looked back at his memories. Her eyes ate at him as he thought of her.

Fury stepped toward him. "Trying to save it."

Steve still hadn't made his mind up about Fury just yet, but his words struck him and he listed to the man as he talked about the threat to the Earth's safety. Even if he didn't trust Fury, he couldn't let Loki get away with his evil plans, not with Toni's life in danger. She may never know how he felt, but he was going to protect her.

The Super Soldier listened to him, getting angrier with each passing second but he refused to let it show as he had a mission to do even if it was his fault. They should have let it in the ocean, but it was too late now and he had to stop it before it did any more damage.

He wondered briefly if he would see Toni, but he brushed those thoughts away. She wasn't a part of this; she didn't need to be a part of this. She was already hurt by this Tesseract and she didn't need to be hurt again.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

"Make your move, Reindeer Games," said Toni.

Hearing her froze him, making him forget where he was and what the mission was. Hearing her voice made him want to drop everything and hold her tight. It made him lose all focus. Shaking his head, he turned back to Loki, who was smirking at Toni. Steve tried to tell himself that there was nothing behind that look of Loki's, but there was something more to it… heat. He wanted to yell at Loki, telling him not look at Toni that way, but he held his tongue.

"Good move," said Toni as Loki put down his weapon.

She landed next to him and he felt his heart skip a beat. He didn't know what to say or how to say it without sounding like a love sick puppy. Why did the sound of her voice do that to him? "Toni," he greeted, happiness dripped off his voice.

She turned to him slightly and Steve could almost feel her glare on him. "Captain," she replied curtly, her voice plain. She was clearly irritated.

He couldn't believe he just did that; he just called her by her first name, which he knew she didn't like. First names were for people whom knew each other; first names were earned with her. They were an honor, which he had earned in the past but not now. Why did he mess up like that? Now, she would never like him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hoped you enjoyed this. I wasn't sure if Dugan was still alive in the future, but he wasn't confirmed dead, so he was the commando that I used. I hope no one was too OOC. I have been struggling with that lately.
> 
> Anyhow I hope you like.


	26. The Restless Soul

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Same copy right as before.
> 
> And I want to give a special thanks to wintersupersoldiers who has proofed this for me. :) She is great.
> 
> Anyhow, I hope you like this chapter and the wait wasn't bad. I have been working so much that it is hard to find time to write, but I will try to be better. At least the chapters are long, right?

* * *

_Not knowing why she was there, Toni found herself sitting on an edge of a cliff with a bottle of fine wine in her hands. She didn't pay much attention in the why as much of the drinking it. As she had every interest in downing the bottle, she saw no need for a wine glass. There was no need to waste water on washing an unneeded glass when she could drink from the bottle itself. Plus, if she drunk from the bottle, it meant that she didn't have to share the expensive bottle of wine which was a good thing because she didn't intended to._

_With her legs swinging lightly over the edge of the cliff, she leaned her head back and took a big drink. She swished the liquid in her mouth, savoring the taste before letting it go down. She stared at the sky for a few seconds before she took another drink. She tilted her head back and closed her eyes as she took in the rich favors. She could feel the alcohol start to affect her, and she loved that. To her, it felt like she was the edge of control and utter chaos, and Toni Stark loved that feeling. It still surprised her that it took so little time for alcohol to affect her despite her years of non-stop drinking and partying – you'd think she'd be immune to it by now. She was thankful she wasn't._

_She didn't enjoy being wasted, though there had been times, but she enjoyed the lack of worry. She enjoyed the ability to stop thinking; she enjoyed the numbness that it brought her and she could pretend she was happy. She wanted to be happy, which the alcohol allowed her the illusion of it. At the moment, it allowed her to relax and enjoy the hot sun, and she sat there as the wind blow lightly._

" _Just as I expected from_ you _, Stark."_

_Toni couldn't suppressed her flinch as that cold, nasty voice cut through the roaring waves. Her heart raced as she turned to face the person who had sneaked up on her. "Bucky," she uttered, surprised to see him here._

_The sergeant looked as he did at the beach, if not bloodier. Blood covered his face, but it didn't hide the murderous expression on his face as he scowled at her. "Enjoying yourself?" he asked, bitterly. The genius could only stare as he stepped toward her with a profound limp. "Enjoying your life while I bleed? While I suffer?" his voice was sharp and cut through her like sharp glass on the skin._

_The wine bottle slipped from Toni's hand, shattering on the stone, as she struggled to her feet. She was tipsy, almost stumbling, but she didn't stop trying. Plus, the shock of seeing Barnes shook some sense and clarity into her. "H-how are you here?" she found herself asking him, struggling over her words._

_Bucky stepped to her ever so slowly. "Sorry that I'm here? Wished I was dead?" he asked, coldly._

_Toni could only stare for a few seconds as he walked to her. Her brain couldn't wrap itself around the fact that Bucky Barnes was in front of her alive, which was frustrating as there were so many things that she wanted to say. She wished she could change what happened to him. "Bucky," she said softly, reaching a hand to his bloody face. To see him like this hurt._

_Before Toni could touch him, Barnes grabbed her wrist and twisted it. She yelped both in pain and shock, as she never expected him to be so mad and malevolent, even with the murderous look in his eyes. The Bucky she knew could never be like this; the Bucky she knew was loving and caring, but she supposed it was her fault. She had let him die. "Bucky," she uttered again, as she stared into his blood shot eyes._

" _Barnes to_ you _," he snapped as he squeezed her wrist._

_She yelped again as she tried to yank her arm away, but no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't break his strong and ruthless grip on her. And to make matters worse, all her struggle did was put her on unstable ground. She could feel the edge of the cliff crumble beneath her as Bucky shoved her back. "Please, stop," she begged._

" _You let me die," he snapped. Bucky sounded betrayed as he spoke and it shattered Toni's already broken heart._

_Tears started to form in her eyes as she found herself balancing on the edge with the only thing keeping her from falling was Bucky's painfully tight grip. "Barnes," she said hesitantly, careful to address him by his last name unlike in her thoughts. There was a nervousness in her voice as she tried to find her footing. "What are you doing?"_

_He leaned her back over the cliff. "Do you want to know how it feels to fall to your death?" he asked with an eerie smile that brought chills to her spine and made her tremble._

" _Barnes, I'm sorry. You don't understand how sorry I am," she said, as the tears started to flow. The fragile ground beneath her heel broke away and she found herself slipping. She tried to readjust her footing but could not with Bucky's out stretched hand. She reached her free hand forward to her other arm as she tried to create some stability._

_Bucky's grip loosened a bit as he pulled her back from the edge. Toni couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief, but it was short lived as he harshly flunked her back. She screamed as both of her feet went over the cliff and she was left hanging on for dear life. Her right arm felt like it was being ripped from her shoulder, as the only thing holding her up was Bucky Barnes. She could do nothing besides trying to climb up the cliff. "Barnes, please," she begged again, as she had before. Her voice started to break as her fear started to creep through. Barnes scared her, remaining silent, as his eyes were drilling into her._

_Against her better judgment, she glanced down and felt her stomach drop. Toni wasn't normally afraid of heights, but right now, she was deathly afraid. All she could see was a long drop onto sharp stones and violent ocean waves. She knew if she were to fall from this height, she would die painfully. "Please," she begged. "Please, don't do this."_

_Barnes scrutinized her with his eyes for a few seconds before he pulled her back up, but he did not let her go. He still held her at the end of the cliff, threating to throw her over. "I want you to fear my pain."_

" _I'm sorry," Toni cried, trying to get away from the edge. "I'm so sorry. Please, believe me."_

_He glared before saying, "Look at what you have done to me!" he snapped._

_She didn't want to look at him, not after what she had done, not with his anger. She was too ashamed of herself, and his anger scared her. She didn't know what he would do. "I'm sorry," she yelled._

" _I don't want your apology," he snapped as he leaned her back._

_Toni's heels barely balanced on the rocky edge as she found herself struggling with Barnes' outstretched arm. She tried to stabilize herself by grabbing his forehand, but he shook her arm off and leaned her farther over the cliff. "Please let me go," she begged._

_Barnes chucked before he spoke, "Do you really want me to let go?" he asked as he left her go for a spilt second._

_For that split second, the genius thought that she was going to die. Everything in her mind went blank, as all she could see was her death, her body smashing into the sharp rocks below. She couldn't imagine anything worse than falling to her death, but she supposed her image of death was worse than the death itself._

_Just as her heels slipped from underneath her, Barnes reached to her and pulled her up, but he kept her on the edge. "You deserve nothing but to fall," Barnes said, as his grip was bone crashing tight._

" _I know I do," she said, agreeing with him. There was no doubt that she deserve to die for what she done to him. "But please, Barnes, don't do this."_

" _Stop your begging! I –"_

" _What's going on over here?" A man yelled, cutting through the deadly air._

_Barnes' glared at Toni before he turned to newcomer, who was staring at them both with an intense look. Barnes didn't say anything to the Captain as he turned back to Toni. He only shoved her back again, sending her heels over the cliff._

_Toni screamed as she tried to dig her feet into the side of the cliff, looking for a foothold. She jagged some rocks free as she kicked, but her legs grow tired almost immediately. She stared at Steve, pleading for some help. "Steve," she cried._

_Rogers appeared to have just come back from an assignment, as he was a mess. His uniform was torn and covered in what appeared to be dirt. His hair was a mop on his head, sticking out in every direction, and dried up mud was plastered to his face. His hands were scrapped up and bloody. Toni didn't know what happened to him, but she couldn't look away. "What are you doing, Bucky?" he asked._

" _What does it look like?" Barnes replied, bitterly._

_Toni tried again to gain her footing but the stone crumbled. "Steve," she yelled, knowing that she wouldn't last much longer. "Please, make him stop," she begged. She could feel her energy drain as she stared at him, pleading._

_Steve stepped toward them, making Toni's heart skip. "No," the super soldier responded, strongly._

" _What?" she uttered as her heart dropped._

" _Bucky's right. You deserve to die," he replied as he looked toward his best friend. "I'm surprised he hasn't dropped you yet. I know I would." His voice was cold and nasty, and it surprised Toni._

" _Steve," she uttered, not believing he had said that. How could he say that? The Steve she knew would never say that as life was important to him. Yes, he killed before, but he didn't enjoy it and avoided it if possible. To him, life was important, something that should be protected at all cost, so for him to say that broke her heart._

" _Don't say my name," the Captain snapped. "You didn't save me from going down, so why should I care about you?"_

_Pain shot through her arm, feeling it separate from her shoulder due to her weight. "I couldn't," she cried. "I couldn't change the past without changing the future. Without you, the future would be different. It could be deadly." She had no idea how the battle of New York would've turned out if Steve hadn't been there._

" _Maybe, I don't want your future," Steve yelled. "Maybe, I want to stay here with Peggy, but you stole that from me because you're heartless, Toni Stark."_

_Toni's heart stopped as she met his ice cold stare. "Steve," she called._

_Rogers turned from them and step away. "Just drop her already, Bucky, and lets go," he said._

" _Steve," she called, struggling. The super soldier didn't stop and kept walking no matter how defeated Toni sounded. "I'm sorry. I had no choice." Tears were streaming down her face._

_Bucky laughed, bringing her attention back to him. "You're pathetic. YOU had a choice, but instead, you did nothing."_

" _I couldn't."_

" _I'm tired of you," he snapped, as he shoved her back and let go._

_For a second as she fell, Toni could only stare at Barnes in disbelief. Even in his anger, she couldn't believe that he had thrown her to her death. She screamed for help, though she knew that no one would save her. As the distance grew between them, her heart seemed to stop, as she found it difficult to breath. She was going to die and that there was nothing she could do._

_Her panic grew, taking over, but the sounds of the waves clashing against the stones and the air rushing snapped her back. However, it did no good as she could feel the mist of the ocean on her arms, and she was deafened by the waves. She could hear nothing but her own racing heartbeat. Trying to slow her heart, she made the mistake of looking down at the water, and images of her broken bloody body filled her mind._

_She imagined the stones impaling and shattering her bones on impact. She could see her body twisted in an unnatural positions as her blood painted the stones before getting washed away by the salt water. The genius couldn't begin to calculate how painful it would be before her heart stopped and she died, but just before she hit the stones, everything went black._

Covered in sweet, Toni awoke with a startle, bolting up in a wobbly cot, which shook beneath her weight. Her body trembled as if she was freezing, but she was burning up. An unnatural heat rushed through her, and she felt like she was on fire with flames licking her skin. With this heat, Toni thought she was going to die, and trying to cool down, she thrust the heavy blanket off as quickly as she could. However, she was still overheating even with the cold, bitter air.

Her hand went to her chest covering her heart, which she could vaguely feel through her reactor, beating at a million miles a second. She tried to catch her breath and slow her heart by slowly counting as calmly as she could, but she couldn't get Barnes' angry face out of her head. His image crumbled Toni, as she bent over trying to catch her breath, but it was at the edge of her grasp and she was left heaving.

Ever since the first nightmare, she hadn't been able to forget his face, and every time she tried to sleep, he was there with those piercingly cold eyes, which frightened and overwhelmed her with guilt. She couldn't rest with her remorseful conscience, only getting a few hours a sleep a night. She had lost count how many nightmares that she had since Bucky had died, but it was the third since Rogers went down. However, it was the first time that she dreamed of Rogers, and it knocked the air from her lungs. Even if Rogers and she fought all of the time, she couldn't deal with him hating her, but it was her fault. Once she got back to her time, she didn't know how or if she could face him.

After a few short breaths, Toni kicked her feet over the cot, as she had to find a way to distract herself. When nightmares plagued her, there was only one place, or rather one thing, that could relax her and that was the lab. Creating and learning new things was one of few things that could distract her from the pain that she was feeling. It kept her sane, though Pepper and Rhodey wouldn't agree. She had gone days with little to no sleep, making herself sick, but it hadn't and wouldn't stop her from doing it.

As she slipped her feet into her boots, her eyes glanced to the empty side of the room. After the first time that Toni had woken Peggy with her nightmares, she asked for a separate room. She said it was so she didn't disturb the Agent, but the real reason why because she didn't want Peggy to see her like this. She didn't want anyone to see her like this.

With a deep breath, she suppressed her shiver and got to her feet. Her eyes glanced toward a light military jacket for a second but decided against it. She was still overheating, and it didn't matter how cold it was in the halls of the London base. It seemed like she was burning in hell for her sins.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Toni took a deep breath as she stared at her device, which she hadn't tested yet as she hadn't been able to find a safe place. She didn't want to test it around people as there was no telling what would happen; however, there was another reason why she hadn't. She was afraid to, not sure of what it would do and what would happen. She had it hooked up to a core, but there was no way of controlling the core. Once she turned it on, it had a mind of its own, which she learned from the last time she had activated it.

She took a deep breath as she laid her head down on the table. She was exhausted, and just looking at that device made her head spin. She couldn't think or function when she was this tired, but she couldn't find peace in her dreams. Though nightmares were common for her, they had never been this bad, and she didn't know what to do. If she asked Phillips for sleeping pills, she would have to tell him about the nightmares, which she didn't want to talk about with anybody, much less him.

The metal table felt cold to her face, and she just wanted to stay here to rest, but the thought of sleeping scared her. She knew it was just a dream, but she couldn't take hatred-filled Bucky's face. Though she had to allow the timeline to stay intact, she doubted her decision not to tell Barnes and Rogers. How much would have changed if she told them?

With a sigh, Toni took a deep breath as she picked up her head and rested it on her hands. She stared at the wall, trying to will herself to think of something else – something positive, or as positive as it got when the world was at war and Toni being suffocated with guilt over what she could have, should have done. Staring, her eyes had started to drift, but she was startled back awake as she heard someone behind her. She flinched stiffly, when she felt a hand on her shoulder, almost falling out of her chair. "Shit," she curse, trying to regain her balance.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you," Howard Stark stated as Toni settled in her chair.

She was too tired to be angry with him, but she felt a bit annoyed. "What are you doing here?" she asked, feeling frustrated with herself.

"A theory."

Her eyebrow rose as she turned to him. "So you're up in the middle of a night for a theory?" she asked.

He smiled. "Looks who calling the kettle black," he replied as he crossed to the device on the table.

"Touché," she replied, watching him eye her device. The Genius wasn't sure what was going through her father's mind as he stared at it; however, she knew what was going through her mind. The more time she spent with her father, the more she realized how alike they were, which both pissed and gladdened her. She enjoyed that there was something that she shared with her father, but it also pissed her off. She refused to be like him, though she wondered if she was fighting a losing battle. She probably was and it made her bitter, thinking back at her childhood and it was painful to think that this man – would become something dark and unrecognizable, someone who didn't care for her and someone she had been glad had died but now wasn't so sure of it.

"I think you can agree, sometimes the best ideas come in the middle of the night," he replied, picking up the device. The Core fizzed in his arms but didn't activate in his hands. It was like the device was flexing its power.

Toni eyed the device, her only way home. It made her nervous to see him handle the device when the core was acting up and sparking. "So what's this theory of yours?" she asked, reaching for the device in Howard's hand.

Seeing her reach for the device, he set it down on the table. "About you," he stated, staring at her. "When was the last time you got some sleep?"

She could lie, but she doubted he would believe her. If she was like him, there would be no lying to him as he would see right through her. As her father didn't sleep much either, he would see all of the lies and the clues. "Well, that depends on what you count as sleep," she replied. She had no idea of when the last time she had gotten more than a few hours of sleep, as each time she closed her eyes, she was plagued with some kind of terror.

"You know you can't do this to yourself, right? You need to sleep," Howard said.

Toni let out a sigh, because there was no denying that he was right. She needed to sleep, but the nightmares woke her every time and she found herself more exhausted than before. "So tell me about this theory?" she said, resting her head back on hands. "Maybe, it will put me to sleep," she said, laughing softly.

Howard gave her a look as he crouched down to get a good look at her face. "Hey, my theories are good."

She could feel herself on the edge of sleepiness, and it was a battle to stay awake. "Theories?" she asked. "You can have more than one theory at the same time?" she teased easily; it was surprising how much had changed over the course of her prolong stay in the past.

"Ouch, and here I thought we were getting along," he said, pretending to be hurt.

Toni could lie and say he hadn't grown on her, but she couldn't. This man in front of her wasn't her father, a man she disliked; he was someone completely different. It made her wonder what happened to make him so cold, and it wasn't just the death of her mother. "So what are your theories?" she asked.

"One is that core won't work. Not strong enough for what you need it for," he replied. "I have been testing these cores, and yes, they have an impressive energy level, but it's limited. The core will only get you so far."

That had been one of Toni's fears, which was why she hadn't tried it yet. What would she do if it didn't work? "How did you come to that idea? You have no idea of what I'm trying to do," she replied.

Howard ignored her question and kept talking. "I was thinking we could use the Tesseract to give the device a jump and use the core to stabilize it through transport." His eyes were back on the device, studying it with great detail.

"Transport?" she asked, catching the word. Why would he use the word transport? Did he know what it did? But there was no way that he could know the truth, and even if there were clues, no one would believe it. "And you found the Tesseract? Where is it?" She knew the danger of the cube and what would become of it if it stayed in the SSR's hands. However, she couldn't do anything about that either.

"Yes and yes," he replied as he turned from the table to a suitcase by the door. Toni watched as he picked up the case and brought it back to the table. Her eyes drifted down to the suitcase as he opened it and took out a few blue prints. "I had a few ideas. Sure, I haven't gotten a good look at the device in a while, but I think this will work," he said as he laid the plans out in front of her.

Toni's eyes flicked from the plans to Howard. He genuinely seemed excited to be helping, and it took her by surprised; however, she shouldn't be surprised by her father anymore. He wasn't the man she knew. "You seemed pleased by this," she replied, looking back at the plans. She knew she would be pleased with herself if she came up with it.

"I am," he replied.

"But you have no idea of what it does," she replied, giving him a look.

"That goes to my second theory," he answered, leaning down against the table.

Even if her tiredness was getting worse, he had sparked her curiosity to a high. "Which is?"

Howard laughed as he straightened himself up. "If I'm wrong, you'll think I'm crazy," he said, with a smile.

Toni chuckled. "I already think you're crazy – the curse of being an inventor and all that," she smiled, fighting her exhaustion. "So tell me your theory." She went back to resting her head on her hands, trying to keep herself awake.

"I can tell you in the morning. Why don't you get some sleep?" he asked, redirecting back the conversion about sleep. It was clear to anyone that Toni hadn't slept in some time. Heavy bags had formed under her eyes and she looked pale.

She closed her eyes, as she picked up her head and leaned back in the chair. There was the cold a draft in the room that assaulted her when she titled her head back. It sent shivers through her body, but she couldn't find the energy to move. However, the air was a shock to her system, keeping her awake. "Can you prescribe me some sleeping pills?" she asked, knowing full well that he couldn't.

His expression turned to worry. "Toni, how often do you have nightmares?" he asked, stepping to her. He placed a hand on her knee as he crouched down next to her. "You can tell me."

Howard's hand felt warm on her kneed, and for a second, it was the only thing she could think of. She couldn't get over how comforting it was to having this version of Howard around. He wasn't cold and distant, someone she couldn't reach. He was warm and caring, a person who she could open up to.

"Toni," Howard called again.

She shocked her head and looked at him. "Sorry," she uttered with a deep sigh.

"How often?"

Toni didn't want to admit that, especially to her father. Sure, he was warm, but that was now. In the future, he wouldn't be like that. He would be cold, and there was no doubt he would see weakness in her nightmares. "Not often," she lied, shaking off his hand and turning away. She couldn't allow herself to become attached to this version of her father.

Howard didn't move as she got to her feet and stepped away. He watched her as she stood there holding herself. He allowed the silence for a few minutes, studying her body language. "Toni," he called again. She was standing half way across the lab, playing with a wrench. "Talk to me. I know both Rogers and Barnes' deaths are hitting you hard, and it is okay to allow people in. You… you don't have to go through this alone."

The Genius from the future wanted to tell him that he was wrong on both. Rogers wasn't dead, just frozen, but that paralyzed her, and she flashed back to her dream. Had her dream been true? Did Steve hate their time? Did he not want to live in that time? Should she tell Howard…and Peggy that he was alive? That would make everyone in this time happy, and it would make Steve happy as he wouldn't have to suffer in her time and deal with her more than he had to.

"All I need is some sleep," she replied, turning back to him. He was also wrong about letting people in. If she let people in, she was opening a door to being hurt, and she was hurting enough as it was.

"That and to talk," Howard replied, getting to his feet.

What was with people wanting her to talk? Sure, talking about engines and fuel intakes was one thing, but she couldn't talk about her heart. She didn't have the heart, remember? "Why do you care?" she asked. It came out harsher than she intended, but she didn't care. She just wanted to know why he cared.

"Why can't I just care? I would like to think that we've become friends," he replied, not moving from his spot.

Toni eyed him as she set down the wrench she was holding. There was a slight red mark in her hand, left from her tight grip, and it stung when she flexed her hand. "Friends?" she asked, as she stared at it. How could anyone think she was a friend, when she allowed her 'friends' suffer?

Howard took a deep breath as he walked around the chair toward her. "Well, maybe more like family."

At the word family, Toni spun and stare. "F-family?" she asked, tripping over the word. Did he just say family? Why in the hell would he call her family?

"That goes to my second theory, you see?" he said.

Toni couldn't see it, and she had no idea of where he was getting at. There was no way that he knew that she was his daughter. "A theory that you're completely and utterly insane?" she asked.

"I think we're all crazy, Toni _Sark_ ," he said, stressing her last name as if he didn't believe it was her given name. "And I think family is the correct word for us."

As her father spoke, she felt her nerves increase and some strange energy rushing through her, keeping her awake. "How's that the correct word?" she asked. "We aren't family, unless you know something I don't." She was stalling through her panic and she hoped it wasn't visible. It wasn't possible, there was no way he could know.

Howard chuckled. "I know a lot of things like how Sark isn't your last name."

Toni's heart started to race. "I think I know my last name," she replied, trying to hide her tremor.

"Like I know mine," he replied. "And there's a lot of resources that come with being a Stark. Of course, you know that very well, Toni."

Feeling light headed, she sat down on the closest chair. Toni told herself it was because of the lack of sleep and her body couldn't keep up. It wasn't because Howard was blind siding her. "I would know that?" she uttered with as much confusion as she could. "And my name is S-"

"No, it's not," Howard said, interrupting her. "And you would."

He was awfully confident – it was like he hadn't just been saying she would think him crazy if he was wrong. Something must have given her away the moment he'd mentioned family.

"Just say it already," Toni said, preparing for the worst. There was a part of her that wondered what would happen if her father knew the truth.

"At first, I knew something was odd, especially with that thing in your chest, and after Phillips couldn't find anything on you, I decided to use my resources to try," he said, stepping to her.

Toni let out a sigh, knowing he found nothing. There was nothing for her father to find. "And what did you find?"

He left out a chuckle. "Nothing. I found nothing. It was as if you didn't exist."

"Maybe I'm just that good," she replied.

Howard shook his head. "No, there's nothing that my guys can't find, and they couldn't find anything about you." He paused, staring at her face. "After we let you go, I never lost track of you, always knowing where you were, which was never far from Barnes and Rogers."

Her eye twitched, not liking the idea that someone was watching her. "Well then your men suck," she replied. "Didn't stop me from breaking into your company."

"You had information that they didn't. You knew my layouts better than most," he said.

"I did my research," Toni said.

"That or you had firsthand knowledge of the lab," Howard answered.

"And how would I?" she asked. "You d-" She started but drifted off as she watched him.

Her father kneed in front of her again. "Are you okay?" he asked, ignoring her question. "You don't look well." He reached a hand to her, trying to check her temperature, but she slapped his arm away. "Toni."

She glared at him, fighting to stay awake. Her body felt stiff and heavy, almost alien to her. "Just go on with your theory." Her head was spinning, and she knew if she tried to stand, it wouldn't end well.

Howard let out a sighing chuckle. "You're stubborn." He rested his hand on her knee again and kept his eyes trained on her face. "If you wish," he said.

There was a lot of things that Toni wished for, and one was to be in her own bed with sleeping pills and maybe drowning them with tequila, but she knew that wasn't going to happen any time soon. "Cut to the chase," she snapped.

"…Again, your lack of a record is odd, and I went to Phillips many times, but he never gave me anything and told me I was reading too much into this," he said. "I thought you were fooling us, pulling the wool over our eyes, but as I got to know you, I knew that wasn't the case. Sure you're annoying and immature at times, but you're honest and caring."

"Caring?" she uttered back. Caring wasn't a word that she would use to describe herself. Heartless was good, because it wasn't possible for her to have a heart after what she had done.

"Yes, caring."

Toni couldn't look at him and looked away, which was a battle with her exhaustion.

Howard shifted his weight to another knee. "You know it was something you said, which got me thinking. I wouldn't have given this theory any thought if it wasn't for you, but once I opened my mind, I saw the clues. When the 107 was captured, you didn't seem all too shock. Like you knew what would happen."

She fought the urge to look back and stared blankly at the wall.

He shifted again, trying to look into her eyes. He was trying to read her facial expression and Toni wasn't going to let him. "You seemed all too comfortable and confidence, which sold it for me."

"What did I say that got you thinking?"

"That you're from the future."

Toni broke out into a laugh, trying to throw him off. "I think you're reading too much into that," she said, recalling what she had said to him. He had tossed it aside as a joke then, and Toni had thought that was the end of that. She thought that she had discredit the idea, but she did the opposite. "I'm Toni Sark from Brooklyn," she said as smoothly as she could in her exhausted-haze. Years and years of experience had made her a master liar, so she said the quickest thing she could think of, and it wasn't a complete lie. She had lived in Brooklyn with Steve and Bucky, which seemed like an eternity ago.

"No, you aren't."

"Then who am I?" she asked, giving him a look.

He chuckled again. "I didn't know how I didn't notice it before. Sure, you don't have my chin, but there's no mistaking those eyes, that noise. You're mine," he said. "My Daughter."

She turned to him, her eyes wide. "Your daughter? I'm _not_ your daughter." She snapped. She had no idea of what to say or how to deny it. "I think Rogers' death had shot you over the edge." Toni shoved Howard's hand off her and pushed away from him. "You're wrong. I'm not from the future," she replied harshly.

"Yes, you are. You're a Stark, and I can see it. There's a fire in your eyes that no one can deny," he replied.

Toni's legs felt like jelly beneath her, and she was to stay to her feet for the time being, but she knew she wouldn't be able to stand for long. "Time travel doesn't exist."

He put on the biggest smile that Toni had even seen. "It is, and my daughter invented it. Is there nothing a Stark can do?" he said, joyfully. There was in an excitement in his voice that tired her just by listening to it. "Do you know how incredible that is, Toni?"

"You know how insane you are? You –" she started but unable to finish, feeling her legs go out beneath her; however, before she could hit the ground, two arms wrapped around her keeping her up.

"Toni," she heard him call her name.

"How…" she said, but her breath died in her throat. Everything was spinning on her.

Howard's grip tightened around her. "Toni," he yelled again. It was a distance yelling as the feeling in her body started to disappear. Everything around her followed form, and it wasn't long before her body and mind gave out on her.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

When Toni came back, she felt druggy and couldn't find the strength to move. It took everything she had to open her eyes, which felt heavy. When she was finally able to, it took a few seconds for her vision to focus. Everything was dull shapes and colors, and she couldn't make out where she was.

She closed her eyes for a second, trying to focus. After a few deep breaths, Toni opened her eyes again and stared off blankly for a few seconds. It wasn't until her vision cleared that she looked around the room, and it was a struggle to do so. She tried to get up on her elbow, but as she tried, she felt two hands on her shoulders pushing her down.

"Toni, you need to rest."

She fought the man for a second before allowing him to push her down. "Stark," she uttered as she stared at her father, who was looking intently at her. "W-where am I?" she choked out.

After he was sure that Toni wouldn't try to get up, Howard released his grip on her. "In the infirmary," he answered, not stepping back from the bed. "Do you need something?"

Toni glanced at him before looking away. "No. W-why am I here?" she asked, noticing an IV in her arm.

"You fainted from sheer exhaustion," he replied. "Are you sure you don't need anything?"

She suppressed the groan in throat as she eyed the IV. She couldn't believe she had let herself to degrade to this point, but she also hated that she had fainted in front of Howard. What must he think of her? "I need to get out of here," she replied, turning to her father. She couldn't believe how weak she'd been – despite years of going by with little sleep since her parent's deaths, she had never passed out, so why had her body chosen to do so now, in front of Howard?

"You need to rest. You're killing yourself," Howard said.

Toni threw her head back and stared at the ceiling. "I'm fine," she said through her teeth. She didn't want to be here, and she wanted nothing more than to get back to her device. It might not work, but she wouldn't know unless she tried.

"Toni," he said sternly. "You need to worry about your health. You can't do this to yourself. You need to sleep."

She stared off, not wanting to look at him, but he had a point. She needed to take care of herself, but she couldn't take the nightmares. It would be one thing if they were scary or bloody, but she couldn't take the guilt ridden ones. "I get it, but I still don't understand why you care."

"You're my daughter. Why wouldn't I care? What happened between us to make you like this?" he asked with sincere distress in his tone.

"I'm not your daughter and I'm not from the future," Toni denied. She knew he wouldn't believe her, but she would try. She didn't want to talk about their relationship. Plus, he couldn't learn anything from the future. "Do you even know how insane you sound? I. Am not. From. The future."

Howard took a deep breath, ready to protest, but before he could speak, the door to the room opened and Phillips stepped in with a nurse behind him. "Sark, I see you're up," Phillips said, eyeing her weak and exhausted form on the bed.

Toni glanced at her father, who grimaced at the name Sark. "Yup, time for me to get out of here," she replied with a weak attempt at her usual arrogant smirk.

"You're not leaving anytime soon, Sark," Phillips said, stepping to the end of the hospital bed. "You collapsed. You need to rest."

"But, Salty," she whined.

Phillips narrowed her eyes. "It never fails does it, Stark? No matter how worn out she is, she'll always call me that," he said to Howard, annoyance in his tone – but with fondness buried deep within his tone that Howard could barely detect unless he hadn't been looking for it. Or maybe he was biased, now that he knew she was his daughter (no matter how hard she tried to deny it) and thinking that everyone should love her.

"Nope. Now stop playing and let me out," she replied, fighting her fatigue. She felt like she had been punched and crushed by the Hulk.

The Colonel let out a sigh before he turned back to Toni. "Toni, you've been running yourself into the ground, and you need to realize this. You need to understand that you aren't immortal, that you're human."

"No, what I need is to get out of here," Toni replied, trying to sit up. "I need to work on my device."

Howard reached toward her, trying to get her to settle down. "Toni."

Toni pulled away from her father and glared. "I can't rest. I _need_ to keep busy," she replied. If she stopped, her guilt would come back in ten folds, and she couldn't handle that.

Phillips let out another sigh as he shook his head. "No, you need to rest." He stared at her, giving one of his famous looks. "You won't like this, but we're going to have to sedate you." He turned to the nurse and waved her forward.

Toni shot up almost instantly, trying to get out of the bed, but Howard wouldn't let her. He held her tight, even with her intense glare. "Let go," she screamed angrily. She had no interest in being sedated, it terrified her. The inability to wake up scared her, especially with her nightmares. She didn't know what she would do if she couldn't wake from them. "I don't want to be sedated. I can't be. _Please,_ please don't do this," she cried desperately, on the verge of hysteria.

Phillips let out a sigh before he said, "Toni, you need to relax. This is for your own good."

The nurse moved around Phillips and stepped toward the IV bag. Toni eyed the nurse with a penetrating scowl as she fought her father. "Please, don't," she begged.

Howard observed Toni's scared expression on her face and turned to Phillips. "Colonel, her nightmares," he said.

Phillips glanced toward Toni. "Do it," he ordered.

Toni could only look on as the nurse needled in the sedate. Almost instantly, she could feel the drug, but she didn't stop fighting. She couldn't stop, not with her nightmares. Being pushed to her death by Barnes shook her to the core, and there was nothing she could do to erase the look on Barnes' face. That anger scared Toni, because people had been known to do terrifying things when they were frightened.

She looked up just before losing consciousness to see Howard step to the Colonel. Toni wasn't sure what they were speaking about, but she hoped it wasn't about her being from the future. He couldn't know that she was his daughter as that would change everything. However, she wasn't able to do anything besides drifting into a nightmare as the drugs had taken over and fear filled her heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End for now.
> 
> I Hope you enjoyed this chapter. This chapter was hard for me, because I wanted to show how Toni's nightmares had been getting to her, but at the same time, I didn't want her to be weak. I am not sure if I passed that in this time.
> 
> However, until next time. :)


	27. The Second Green Beast

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soo... I am soo sorry. I am not sure why it took me so long to get this out. Hopefully, my next chapter does not take so long to get out.
> 
> Anyhow, here you go.
> 
> I hoped you like this.

 

**Chapter 27**

**The Second Green Beast**

* * *

Steve and Toni, with helmets off, were doing sideway glances at each other. He knew she was sizing him up with that intense glare of hers, which he had come to love; however, this look was different than the ones he was used to. They were cold, non-trusting, and he hated it. He wanted her to trust him again, which would be a battle. _I have to get her to open up again_ , he thought to himself. "I don't like it."

"What? Rock of Ages giving up so easily?" was her reply.

He couldn't keep his eyes off her and the iron man suit. Her body was incased in the suit, and he was completely unable to make out her form in the bulky suit. He could only see her pale face and messy hair that was sticking out everywhere. However, even with helmet hair, she was still beautiful in his eyes, and he couldn't see himself with anyone else. "I don't remember it being that easy. This guy packs a wallop."

"It's like calisthenics. You might have missed a couple things, you know, doing time as a Capsicle," Toni replied, with a chuckle.

That hit him harder than he expected. He knew her for the one liners, but to hear it from her now just reminded him that she wasn't the Toni he knew. It also stung to hear her say those insults to him, but it was his issue, which he would have to deal with. He knew it would be difficult the first time they met again, but he didn't think it would be so soon. He had no idea that Fury was bringing in Toni, and he wondered if Fury did this on purpose.

Why was it so hard to stand here? He was bursting to tell her everything, even if he knew that was stupid, but he wished he had some time to prepare meeting her, so he wasn't like this. Why did he have to be like this? Why did she reduce him to this? How did she do it? His legs felt like jello under her stare.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Steve kept telling it was all in his head as there was no reason why Loki would be eyeing Toni. Seriously, why was he staring at her like that? Did Toni have what Loki wanted? If so, what was it? Was it technology? That couldn't be it with that intent stare. It looked like he wanted _her,_ but why?The super Soldier wasn't sure what it was, but he didn't like it. He was looking at her like she was some kind of object and he hated it.

He wanted nothing more than to shut Loki up. "What's the matter? Scared of a little lightning?" he asked, noticing some distance thunder. The sudden storm struck Steve as odd, but he enjoyed seeing the worried look on Loki's face. He rather enjoyed it compared to the hunger look that he spotted whenever he looked at Toni.

Loki glanced up. "I'm not overly fond of what follows," he replied, playing with his hands.

Before anyone could respond or interject, Loki was gone as Thor (if Steve recalled correctly) took him from the ship with little issue. It amazed Steve how easily Thor was able to grab his brother from a moving aircraft, and it took him a few seconds for him to comprehend that it happened. It was a hard adjustment for him, to know that there were beings like that in existence.

It was Toni who snapped him out of his daze, saying, "Now there's that guy, and he's…some guy." Her tone changed slightly as if she was flirting.

Steve glanced back her, shocked. Did she really find Thor that attractive? What did that being (Steve would not call him a god) have that he did not? Was it the hair? The muscles? Steve didn't have time to ponder that, as Toni put her helmet on and proceeded to jump out of the craft without any thought. She didn't stop to come up with a plan, stating she didn't need one. She frustrated him to no end, but this was the woman that he fell for, and he didn't regret it. However, he just wished she listened to him at times, but something told him that that would never happen.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

The Captain had jumped from many planes; it was nothing new to him. He wasn't afraid of the height; he wasn't afraid of falling. He usually didn't worry, but this time, he couldn't keep his mind off Toni. With her mouth, she could get in some deep trouble, and he was afraid of that now. There was no telling what would happen to her down there with Thor and Loki.

However, he didn't have to wonder as Thor sent Toni back, flying into a tree. Steve couldn't suppressed his flinch and fear as the tree cracked behind her. He could see the suit buckle as she fell back, and he found it difficult to breathe as the tree fell on her. For the next few seconds while he waited for some kind of movement from Toni, Steve was terrified. He couldn't get that first image of a beaten, unconscious Toni from his mind, and he couldn't take it.

It wasn't long before his terror turned into anger as it was taking too long for him to land. It felt like he had been falling for hours as he watched for some kind of movement from Toni, and he had to do something. Without any hesitation, he reached for a knife and cut himself free of the parachute.

The Captain felt the air rushed him as he free fell; however, he wasn't worried about the hitting the ground as his eyes were focused on the broken tree that had fallen on Toni. Seconds before hitting the ground, the tree shock and a bright light shown through the broken branches, and Steve let out the breath that he didn't know he was holding. He could feel his heart rest slightly as he saw a red metal arm reached out of the branches.

However, Steve's relief was shot lived as Thor raised his hammer again. With sheer determination, he angled him and aimed himself for a spot between Toni and Thor. He was going to do whatever he needed to do to protect Toni. "That's enough!" he yelled as he landed hard. He straightened himself up with his shield pointing toward the fake god.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Steve was only vaguely listening to Fury's banter with Loki as he was too focused on Thor. The rest of group was listening to Fury as he tried to tell Loki how screwed he was. Steve had no interest in this conversation as he couldn't get Toni out of his mind. He couldn't stop thinking about how Thor could've hurt Toni in that fight as he flung her around like a rag doll, and it pissed him the hell off. No woman should be treated like that, and Steve was itching to tell him that, though he doubted Thor would listen.

"Yeah, well, you let me know if the Real Power wants a magazine or something," Fury said.

Steve only glanced at the monitor for a second before he glanced back Thor. He really had no interest in listening to Loki, as he knew that would help no one. Loki would love to get into their heads and fuck them up. Steve wished that they would just locked him up and throw away the key.

"Well since you offered," Loki started, stepping toward the glass wall. "I think I saw a magazine with a certain dark headed brunette. Why don't you get that for me? I enjoy her sassiness."

That comment snapped Steve back to Fury and Loki's conversion and he bolted up from his seat. If the chair wasn't stationary, there was no doubt that the chair would have been knocked back.

Banner glanced up from the monitor and looked toward Steve, who was glaring at the monitor. "You okay?"

Steve glanced around the room, noticing a few eyes on him, which was just a sign that he needed to relax. He had to remind himself that this was just a game to Loki, who trying to get to them. The Captain knew this, but he couldn't help but fall for it. "He seems interested in T-Stark," he said, trying to play off his shock.

He also didn't need the team to know that he was in love- yup, he still got faint of heart whenever he thought of her- with Toni. He wouldn't know how to explain this feelings either. How would he without telling them everything? Also, he had other things to worry about, and that was Loki's obsession with Toni. Why he so focused on Toni? Steve didn't know, but he would let that man anywhere near her.

Romanoff glanced at Steve. "Maybe, we can use that," she replied with her arms folded a crossed her chest. Her eyes were glued to the monitors.

Steve wanted to protest that until his mute, but he knew Toni wouldn't be too pleased if she heard. She wasn't one who liked to be protected. "Maybe, we should find out why first."

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

As soon as Toni walked onto the bridge with Agent Coulson, Steve's eyes were on her. He may not have no idea of what she were saying most of the time, but there was something about the way she spoke that drew him in. She had a self-confidence about her.

"It means the portal won't collapse on itself, like it did at SHIELD," Toni said. She quickly scanned the room before he eyes rested on Thor, to Steve's annoyance. "No hard feelings, Point Break. You've got a mean swing," she said, looking him over. "Geez, look at those arms. You've been working out," she said with a wink as she squeezed.

Thor didn't flinch at the sudden touch as he eyed her. His mouth twitched as to say anything, but before he could, Romanoff interjected, eyeing the genius "Stark, now is not the time." Her voice was stern, clearly a warning.

"Geez, Romanoff." Toni said as she stepped back to the table. "But it means the portal can open as wide, and stay open as long, as Loki wants," she said, jumping back to the matter at hand.

The former Russian spy wasn't the only one annoyed at the touch. Even if he reasons were different, Steve was as well, and he couldn't hold back his annoyance. No one noticed though, which was probably good as he couldn't help but glance down at his own arms before looking back to Thor, who was still eyeing the genius. _His arms aren't that big_ , he thought, bitterly. The fake god's arm wasn't much bigger than his, and he didn't understand what was so great about Thor's.

Steve's eyes froze on Thor, trying to figure him out. Thor's very being threw the super soldier off, as most believed him to be a god; however, there was only one God that Steve believed in. Thor's existence would not spread doubt in him, but it was hard not to be insult by the fake god. This was what people considered a god? How could anyone pray to someone like that?

With a shake of his head, the Captain leaned back in his chair as he wondered why he was here. Sure, he was useful, but surely they didn't need him with the fake god around. _Stop it,_ he thought to himself. He needed to stop being so bitter, because there was no time for it. They had Loki to worry about.

However, as he thought of Loki, he couldn't get that look Loki gave Toni out of his mind. He kept seeing it as it reminded him as a lion hunting for its next meal. It was a clear sign that Loki wanted something from the brunette, and that comment about a magazine was proof enough. However, whatever it was, Steve wouldn't allow him to hurt his Toni… Wait, his? When did he start referring to Toni as his?

"That man is playing gallaga!" Toni yelled, snapping Steve back to reality. "Thought we wouldn't notice, but we did."

Steve's eyes snapped to her, as she covered one of her eyes with her hands. Though she was always like this, he surprised with her outburst. Sure, he understood that she had a mouth and didn't respect authority, but now, wasn't the time. That was one of the things that annoyed him about her. She never seemed to take things seriously, though he wondered if she did it to protect herself.

After a sigh, Steve hated how she hid before her jokes. Why couldn't she be honest with someone? Was she was honest with anyone, like Ms. Potts or Colonel Rhodes? He hadn't had the pleasure of meeting them, but he had heard they were close. He wasn't sure how close Rhodes was to Toni, but he told himself he wasn't going be jealous of nothing.

"The rest of the raw materials, Agent Barton can get his hands on pretty easily. Only major component he still needs is a power source. A high energy density, something to kick start the cube," Toni said, drawing him out of his thoughts.

Drifting off again, Steve couldn't help but notice the glow in her eyes. She wasn't smiling like she was a few seconds ago, but he could tell she was in her element. He couldn't help but stare as she looked absolutely beautiful. To him, she was already breathtaking even with stupid jokes. "Does Loki need any particular kind of power source?" he said, barely recalling saying it.

Banner glanced at Steve before looking back to Toni. "He got to heat the cube to a hundred and twenty million Kelvin just to break through the Coulomb barrier," he said.

"Unless, Selvig has figured out how to stabilize the quantum tunneling effect," Toni replied.

"Well, if he could do that, he could achieve Heavy Ion Fusion at any reactor on the planet," Banner said.

Toni's face lit up as she crossed Bruce. "Finally, someone who speaks English," she cheered as she patted the scientist on the shoulder.

Her touch lingered on Bruce's arm for a few seconds, which was too long for Steve's liking. "Is that what just happened?" he muttered, bitterly as he forced himself to look away. Why did she have the need to touch everyone? He could never understand; however, they had other things to worry about instead of his jealousy. But he couldn't get those two out of his mind as he couldn't stop thinking about what Banner had that he didn't.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

The Captain didn't know what to make of everything that was happening around him. Between seeing Toni and being surrendered by unknown devices and people, his head was spinning. Sure, he had nothing to judge anything on in this century, but he could tell that he could trust no one especially Fury. He didn't trust that man at all even if he had nothing to go off of.

With a deep breath, Steve made his ways through the ship toward the labs. He wasn't sure why he was headed toward the lab. He wasn't sure if it was because Toni was there or whether it was because he had a desire to figure out what the hell was going on.

This craft was unusual to say the least, and it took some time for Steve to find the lab, but when he finally came across it, the Captain just stared. He couldn't keep his eyes off the energetic Stark as she worked. He couldn't get over how comfortable she looked when she worked.

For the next few minutes, Steve watched her interact with Banner. His jaw was locked in place as he eyed her hand resting on Banner's arm while the other rested on lab table. They were looking at something chatting away, and even if Steve wouldn't hear what they were saying, he doubted he would understand what they were saying. It was another thing that he hated. There was a part of her life that he would never understand.

 _Get a grip,_ he told himself, still watching the two work. He let out a sign of relief when Toni stepped away from Banner to look at a different monitor. However his relief was short life, when Toni stepped back to Banner. She played with something in hands as she stepped back Banner. It amazed him to how touchy she was with a man she had just met. _She was never touchy me_ , He thought to himself, bitterly.

His bitterness was short lived when Toni suddenly poked Banner with the object that she was holding. Banner's yelp of pain angered Steve and it pulled him into the room. How could she be so stupid?

"Nothing?" Toni said, looking at Banner.

As Steve stared wide eye at her, his anger grew. He couldn't believe how reckless Toni was. Did she not understand what she was doing? "Hey!" He yelled, getting their attention. "Are you nuts?"

Toni glanced at Steve from the corner of her eyes before she turned fully back to Banner. "You really have got a lid on it, haven't you? What's your secret? Mellow jazz? Bongo drums? Huge bag of weed?"

For a few seconds, Steve just stared, not knowing how to respond to what she had said. How could she not realized what she was doing? Did she not care? Steve wasn't sure, but he was beginning to wonder why the hell he liked her. How could he love someone who would put everyone around her in danger with no care to what happened? "Is everything a joke to you?"

She shrugged before saying, "Funny things are."

Steve was getting angrier and angrier with each passing second. "Threatening the safety of everyone on this ship isn't funny." He glanced at Banner for a second, annoyed that he was even there. "No offense, doctor." It came out harsher than he intended, but he didn't care, not with imagine of Toni's hand on his arm.

Banner looked slightly taken back by Steve's tone, but he didn't let it affect me. "No, it..it's alright. I wouldn't have come aboard if I couldn't handle pointy things."

Toni stepped back to Banner and put her arm on his shoulder. "You're tiptoeing, big man. You need to strut," she said with a smile. Her hands squeezed his shoulder as she looked at him.

Steve couldn't believe she was acting like this. "And you need to focus on the problem, Miss Stark," he said, coldly.

"You think I'm not?" Toni asked back, a bit snappy. "Why did Fury call us and why now? Why not before? What isn't he telling us? I can't do the equation unless I have all the variables." Her hand dropped from Bruce's shoulder to the lab table. Her fingers traced the edges of a meter.

"You think Fury's hiding something?" Steve asked, meeting her glare. He would see her sizing him up, almost expecting him to fold under her glare, but he knew how to handle it.

Toni didn't look away from the Captain, who was a few feet from her. **"** He's a spy. Captain, he's the spy. His secrets have secrets." She looked at him for one more second before she turned to Bruce. "It's bugging him too, isn't it?" she said, point to Banner.

Banner shifted uncomfortable under their glances. "Uh...I just wanna finish my work here and..."

"Doctor?" Steve asked. His voice was slightly softer, but he did not like the chemistry between these two.

Banner let out a sigh as he stepped to the other sigh of the table. "'A warm light for all mankind to share', Loki's jab at Fury about the cube."

Steve could barely recall anything that Loki had said as he couldn't get Loki's eyes out of his mind. "I heard it." Steve glanced at Toni from the corner of his eyes. Never standing still, she had moved from the table and grabbed a bag of blueberries from somewhere. He wondered briefly where she got those from before he turned to Banner.

"Well, I think that was meant for you." Banner said, pointing to Toni. "Even if Barton didn't post that all over the news."

Steve flashed back that café where he always found himself at in New York. It was where he sat and stretched Toni; however, they did not need to know that. "The Stark Tower? That big ugly..." He paused for a second as he eyed Toni glaring at him again. "…building in New York?" He knew was digging himself a hole with Toni.

However, as he listed to Toni and Bruce go on, he found himself worrying less about the hole he was digging. Though it was true that he didn't trust Fury, he disliked how her total disrespect for those around her and was annoyed that Banner was going along with this. Maybe, it was just him, but why she couldn't just followed orders?

Why couldn't she just listen? It was frustrating him to no end and he was left pondering why or how he was in love with this woman. How could he love someone who stood against everything that he stood for? He liked order and structure, but she loved disobedience and madness. She didn't listen no matter what the subject was and he just wanted her to shut up and listen. However, the only way he would think of doing that was just to grab her and kiss her, which was what he wanted to do so badly. He wanted to hold her tightly and kissed her until she shut up.

"Following is not really my style," Toni said with a shrug.

Steve already knew that as Colonel Phillips had a hard time with her. "And you're all about style, aren't you?" he asked. At the moment as he stared at her, he had a hard time believing this was the same woman that he had lived with for a short time. How was this the woman who held ice to his face when he came home beaten up?

"Of the people in this room, which one is; a) wearing a spangly outfit, and b) not of use?" Toni replied.

Steve let out an angry huff as he was tired of her making fun of his outfit, even if this technically was the first time for her. However, her jokes and insults were wearing thin his patience. He wasn't sure what was worse her immaturity or her lack of caring for others.

"Steve, tell me none of this smells a little funky to you?" Banner said, drawing his Steve's attention.

The Captain tried to control his flinch at the sound of his first name from Banner's lips. For some reason, it annoyed him to hear it. They were not friends, especially with Toni flirting with the scientist right in front of him. He wasn't sure if this was normal for Stark or whether she did this to everyone, but he did not like it. "Just find the cube," Steve said, coldly.

He glanced from Banner to Toni and all he got was angry. He couldn't understand how she could be flirting with him so soon. She just met the guy and she was already flirting? It just annoyed him so much, and he just needed to get away before he did or said something he would regret.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

"I was wrong, Director. The world hasn't changed a bit," Steve stated, angry. He knew he shouldn't trust the director, but he never thought he would use the cube to make Tesseract weapons.

To him, anyone who made weapons from the Tesseract was not a friendly in his book. How could Fury even begin to think that was wise? There was no way explanation in Steve's mind that could justify what Fury was doing. To make things worse, he had lied to them. He had brought them in to fix his mistakes. He had put the world, including Toni's life, in jeopardy, and he couldn't forget that.

He also didn't like the way that Fury was talking to Toni. It was uncalled for, and Steve was close to snapping at him. No one was allowed to talk to her like that, even if she brought it upon herself.

However, just as Steve didn't think could worse, Romanoff and Thor walked into the room, which caused the tension in the room to jump. At this rate, Steve would be surprised if a fight broke out, which wouldn't be any good. There was no doubt that a fight would take out half the ship and hurt a lot of people, Toni being one of them. That was something he wouldn't allow, even if she pissed him off.

"A nuclear deterrent, cause that always calms everything right down," Toni said, jokingly. She was leaning against the lab table with her arms folded across her arms.

"Remind me again how you made your fortune, Stark?" Fury said to her.

There was something in Toni's eyes that annoyed Steve. Even now, she wasn't serious. It was all a joke to her. "I'm sure if she still made weapons, Stark would be neck deep..." He had no idea of where this was coming from but it all flooding out. There was some part of him that wanted to annoy her for once.

"Wait! Wait! Hold on! How is this now about me?" Toni said, loudly, as she stepped forward. There was shock in her voice that surprised him, even if it was masked by a joking tone.

"I'm sorry, isn't everything?" Steve said, thinking back to her flirting with Thor and Banner.

This was where it all spiraled down for everyone in the room, and this was where he was making it worse for him. He was never one to put his own foot in his mouth, but he knew he was doing it right there. However, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't stop himself.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Steve was staring her eyes, studying her up as he was looking for a weakness. "Always a way out. You know, you may not be a threat, but you better stop pretending to be a hero."

"A hero, like you? You're a laboratory experiment, Rogers. Everything special about you came out of a bottle," Toni snapped, getting into Steve's face even if she was a foot or two shorter than he.

Her tone had turned deadly silence, which was a tone that Steve hadn't heard from the woman. "Put on the suite, let's go a few rounds," Steve said. He maybe have regretted his every word that he was saying, but he was too angry to stop himself. He wanted to make her angry. He wanted her to feel frustrated like he was. He wanted to get to her like she did to him. He wanted to make her feel something. If he couldn't get her to feel anger, how could he get her to feel anything like love?

However, he had gone too far with the woman in front of him and he knew it. She was boiling. He had hit and nerve and he knew it, but there was nothing he could do. He had shot himself in the foot, and the only thing he could do was continue the fight as she wasn't going to let it drop; however, it made him sick to his stomach. It was dawning on him that he was ruining his chance with Toni.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

When the Captain saw Banner picking up the Sector, Steve's mind almost instantly let go of his anger and frustration that he had. The instant he saw it was the instant his mind went into overdrive to protect the brunette next to him. Without really thinking about it, he stepped in front of Toni, blocking her view of Banner. He wasn't going to let anything happen to her, even if it pissed her off.

"Dr. Banner, put down the scepter," he ordered as he could feel the glare from Toni.

Toni side stepped Steve without saying a word, but if eyes could kill, he would be dead. "Bruce," she called, her eyes switching to Bruce.

There was a long silence in the room as Bruce and Toni stared at each other. Steve could only look between the two as they silently communicate with each other with your eyes. Even if this wasn't the right time or place, Steve found his annoyance was coming back. Were this some kind of flirting game? Why was she staring at him like that?

However, before anyone could speak, a sensor went off. On one of the monitor, they found the Tesseract and there was no time waste. There was no telling what they were planning. The monitor kept beeping and flashing, which Toni took as her clue. She jumped into action before anyone had a plan, which irritated Steve. Did she not think before she acted? Was she always this reckless and stupid? Did she think of anyone else but herself?

Steve stepped toward the door as he tried to stop her; however, he should've known better. He should've known that would only cause a fight.

"I'm not afraid to hit an old man," Toni snapped, getting back in Steve's face.

 _Old man_? He hated that she thought of him of that. He was anything but an old man and he wanted to show her that; however, he wasn't going to fight her, not her. She was the last person he wanted to hurt in the world and he would do anything to protect her. "Well, it wouldn't really be a fight as I would fight a woman. I would let you win."

If it was possible, the genius exploded as her rage came out in folds. "Let me?" she said. "Let me? You wouldn't stand a chance."

"I-" Steve started but was interrupted by an explosion that rocketed through the ship sending them all to the ground. For a second, everyone was in the daze as the craft shook below them, and it took Steve a seconds for him to regain his composure. It was a second later that his mind went to Toni, who was struggling to her feet.

The sound of bullets rang though the ship as another explosion rumbled through the ship. Steve could hear people yell and shout, even as the alarms sounded. He could hear someone kill orders over the speakers, but it was all mumbles to the Captain, who was forced on the woman he loved. Fear flooded him as he imagined her death, which almost made his heart stop.

 _No,_ he thought. He wasn't going to let her die. Determination filled Steve as he got to his feet and rushed over to Toni. Even if she would not approve, he would not allow her to get hurt. He had to get her to safety and the best place for her was in her suit, even if it put her in the line of fire. He didn't know what he would do if she got hurt again…even if it wasn't technically again for her yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end for now
> 
> With this chapter, I wanted to show some Avengers movie action, but I didn't want to do the whole Avenger movie. I hope you enjoyed it.
> 
> Don't worry, we will see Toni in the past in the next chapter.
> 
> Until next time.


	28. Rising Guilt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, all. I am sorry that I took so long. Here you go. I hope you enjoy.
> 
> And I hope you don't find Toni too annoying in this chapter and the next. She is going to be Guilt Ridden in the next couple of chapters.
> 
> Thanks for Wintersupersoldiers, who puts up with me and my crazyiness.

Chapter 28:

Rising Guilt

* * *

Toni didn't know when she came to as it was a never ending nightmare to her. Even in her drug induced coma, the nightmares didn't stop and seemed to tire her out even more. Sure, she felt somewhat rested, but it felt like she hadn't slept in days. When she came to, she just blinked for a few seconds as she stared up at the ceiling.

Her body felt stiff and heavy, taking everything she had to move. Toni groaned softly as she pushed herself up using her elbows. She paused, being out of breath, and rested on her elbows. She struggled to keep herself up, but the cold air felt nice against her skin. She felt like she was on fire, like she was going to burst from the heat.

Unable to hold herself up anymore, she fell back onto the hard bed and reminded like that for a few minutes before she kicked her feet. She had to get the itchy, heavy blanket off. _Leave to them to give me an itchy blanket,_ she thought to herself as the blanket fell to the ground. It was like she could breathe again as it fell.

For a while, Toni just laid there as she stared at the ceiling mindlessly, not paying attention to anything besides the dirty ceiling. The only thing in her mind was the cool breeze of air hitting her, reminding her that she was still alive. When she was in the coma, she had thought she was dead and had gone to hell, which was where she thought she belonged. She had sat back and allowed two people she cared about to die or be hurt. She allowed everyone to suffer, because she did nothing. She did nothing when Rogers came to her in tears, sobbing over the death of his best friend. She was the reason why he was hurting _and_ why Peggy was hurting. She knew where Rogers was. She knew he was still live-frozen but alive-, and she did nothing. All she did was whine and drown in own guilt.

_Starks are good at the guilty trip_ , she thought with a deep breath. She closed her eyes and took another deep breath, trying to relax. She was a Stark, and they didn't (or rather not supposed to) let people see them sweat. She had an image to protect and that did not involve looking weak, which was what was happening.

"T-oni."

Said genius flinched at the sound of her name, realizing that she wasn't alone. She slowly pushed herself up onto her elbow again and turned toward the voice. Struggling to remain up, her eyes twitched as she noticed her father sleeping awkwardly in a small arm chair. He was leaning back with his elbow bent so he could use the back of his hand as a head rest.

For some time, Toni just watched him sleep, looking for any sort of movement or clue that he was going to wake up. She found herself wondering how long her father had been sleeping at her bed side. Had he been here the whole time that she had been out? He couldn't have been there the whole time, right? That was not the father she remembered growing up, but then again, she had been learning that since she arrived in this time. This was not her father.

And though she hated to admit it, it warmed her heart to see him there. She could imagine him sitting at her bedside, even if he never had. She could imagine this man doing a lot of fatherly things, unlike the man she grew up with. However, she didn't have time to ponder that. She had to get out of here and back to her time, where she hoped would free her from the nightmares. Moving slowly, she swung her feet over the bed and pushed herself to her feet. She wobbled for a minute before gaining her balance.

To Toni's joy, she wasn't wearing a hospital grown, though she wasn't wearing shoes. Trying to be as quiet as she could, she looked for her boots; however, with each step she took, she thought her father was going to wake up. The man she knew was a light sleeper, and she always had a bad habit of waking him up when she was a child… which he hated. He was a beast when awoke.

A beast.

Shaking her head, the genius focused on finding her shoes, which wasn't too hard to find. They were at the end of the hospital bed, but as she reached for them, the door to the room creeped open. Ignoring her fear, her third thought was that it was Colonel Phillips, coming to yell at her, but the footsteps were too light to belong to him.

"What are you doing, Toni?"

Toni let out a sighing smile as she recognized that British accent. "Geez, Peg. Keep it down. We don't want to wake Stark. We'll never hear the end of it, if we do," she replied, back stepping to the bed to sit. She didn't have the energy to put her shoes on standing up.

"You seem to know him well," Peggy said, stepping into the room. Her heels tapped lightly with each step.

Toni kept her gaze on the heels, hardly seeing Aunt Peggy not wearing them. Usually, whenever she heard the soft clicking of heels, it was a calming, knowing her favorite Aunt was there to see her. With Peggy, there was no judgement, and the genius loved that. She loved that she could talk to the Agent about anything. "I don't know if I agree. I feel like I don't know him at all," she said, slipping her right foot into the boot. It was a struggle with the laces still tight.

"Do you want to know him?" the Agent asked, softly.

Before this all happened, Toni knew the answer to that. It was no. A big fucking no, but now, she didn't know. That man in the chair was someone else, and she found her wondering who he was. "I want to get out of here."

With a sigh, Peggy turned slightly and stepped to the sleeping Howard, who was snoring softly. "I never realized he snored," she replied. "Might have to record this and tease him with it later."

Toni glanced up at the smile on Peggy's face, which was nice to see. She hadn't seen the Agent smile, since Rogers went down… _My fault. That's my fault,_ she thought sadly. She could tell them where he was, but she wouldn't. Instead, she was going to allow everyone to suffer just like she always did. It seemed like she would never change. Still Heartless.

"Toni."

Said Time Traveler could barely comprehend her name as Peggy said it. Everything felt distance to Toni as she slipped the other boot on. It wasn't until Peggy placed a hand on Toni's shoulder that she snapped back to the Agent, who was looking at her worried. "Peg," she replied.

Peggy's hand dropped from Toni's shoulder as she took a seat next to her. "Howard's the only one who calls me that."

"I'm aware," she replied, thinking back to her childhood. Whenever her father spoke to Peggy, it was always Peg with the rare Peggy. Her mother wasn't a fan and always making a face whenever he called Peggy that. Toni was aware why her mother made that face, not trusting her husband with Peggy. However, even as a child, Toni knew there was nothing to worry about.

The Agent scouted closer to the Toni, who was now hunched over. "I don't think I had ever seen him like this. He isn't the type to sleep at a woman's bedside. You must be important to Howard."

Toni groaned as she looked her father over. She wanted to forget that Howard knew that he was her father, because it would be easier. "Peggy," she said, straightening up. "I have things to do. If you don't mind, I better be off."

Peggy let out a sigh, letting the brunette slip out of her grip. "You should be resting. You need to. Neither Barnes or Steve would want you to go on like this."

With that, Toni felt sick. "You don't need to worry about me. I'll be gone soon," she replied, thinking back to what her father had said by using the Tesseract. He might've been on to something, as the Tesseract could open portals, which was what time travel was. "Besides, I'm not the only one in pain. How are you, Peggy?"

"Better then you, Toni. I didn't faint from exhaustion," she replied. "Also, hadn't been kidnap as many times either."

Toni let out another groan as she started to count the number she had been taken. If Clint ever found out, he really would have a field day. "Rub it in why don't you," she said, annoyed.

Peggy let out a sigh as she got up to follow Toni. "Talk to me. Tell me what's going on."

"We're going to woke Stark," She replied.

"Toni."

"I got to go," she said, stepping to the door.

"Talk to me," Peggy demanded, sternly.

"NO," Toni yelled. She couldn't- wouldn't talk to her, as Peggy wouldn't understand. Besides, Toni had no right to talk to her, after everything. "You-"

"Toni."

Toni froze at the sound of Howard's voice. She glanced ever so slowly to the man and felt her heart skip a few beats as she hoped not to find him staring at her. To her joy, she found herself staring at his eyes lids. He was still sleeping, only having shifted in the seat. "No," Toni said, quietly.

Peggy glanced back at Howard before following Toni out of the room. It was clear that she wasn't going to take a 'no' for an answer. "Why don't you want Howard to wake up? What aren't you telling me?"

Her body felt strange to her, feeling like she wasn't even in her body, but Toni willed herself forward. "Nothing. I'm not hiding anything," she replied.

"I know Howard Stark, and he doesn't care easily. I can count on one hand the number of people Howard genuinely cares about," Peggy said.

Toni knew how that was, as she was the same way. She didn't care easily. "And your point?" she asked as she started to step down the hall.

"You should be resting," Peggy said, eyeing Toni's sluggish movement.

"I need to go," Toni replied. She couldn't be here anymore; the guilt was getting to her.

"Go where, Toni?"

Toni couldn't take it anymore. Why couldn't Peggy understand that she didn't want to talk? She wanted to be left alone. "I want to go home, okay? I don't want to be here anymore." She was sick of this time, and even if she would have to deal with all of the lectures from the Avengers, she wanted to be with them.

"Home where?" Peggy asked.

At this point, Toni didn't care if she spilled the beans; she just wanted her to shut up. "The future."

Peggy's face crunched, not believing it. "Fine, don't tell me, but I'm worried about you."

The Engineer didn't blame her for that, and Toni wouldn't believe herself if she didn't experience it firsthand. Why would anyone in the right mind believe her? She still had no idea why Howard or Phillips did. "I don't care if you do or not. Why don't you talk to Howard? He'll confirm it for you," she said, turning from her.

"Toni!" Peggy called as Toni turned and ran.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

The first thing on Toni's mind was finding a place where she could use her device. She had to pick a place that would be safe. If this time was anything like the last time, it would be a painful experience for her and anything or one around her. She needed a place far away from people, and this base wasn't the answer.

However, there was a problem with that. She knew well enough that the Colonel Phillips wasn't going to allow her to take the Tesseract off base or even use it, but she would have to try. If he did, she had to find a place that was stable enough to withstand the waves. But first, she needed her device.

To her luck, it was in the science lab, mixed in with her father's equipment. It was neatly in its case and stacked on top of a few metal cases, which brought a smile to the genius' face. This was one of the few things that she didn't share with her father. Though she wasn't generally a messy person, her labs were never straight or neat. Her blueprints and tools were usually scattered a crossed the work bench, or sometimes, the floor. However, she knew-

"I do enjoy watching you work."

Toni tried her best to suppress her flinch, but she jumped at the voice. She knew who it was before she turned around; however, his presence still surprised her, even though she expected this. He was after something after all. She wished the murderer would just leave her alone as she wasn't going to give in, even if she went crazy. "Anyone would," she replied as she turned around to face him.

"You know how to get me all crazy, if you know what I mean," Loki said, smirking. His clothes, though still dainty, fit his frame better, which made it seem like he was taking care of himself.

Even if she was exhausted both mentally and physically, she would never agree to go with him, and he was getting on her last nerve, which was probably a normal thing for her. Everyone got on her nerves. "The answer is still no. I have a dress code for my dates. I require at least a Westmancott, but I prefer an Amosu on a man. You are wearing none," she replied as waved at his clothes. "So my answer is no."

He gave her a long look as he stepped to the metal equipment cases of all different shapes. His fingers traced the Stark Industries logo on the top of the cases as if he was trying to memorize it. "Those names mean nothing to me, and if you agree, they will mean nothing to you as well," he said.

That struck Toni as odd, because she didn't understand why those names would mean nothing to her soon? Did he want her memory or something? However, what would her memories give him? Maybe, he wanted her brain? But she didn't understand that ether. She knew she should find out, but to be honest, she was too exhausted to care as she had already put too much thought into this game, and she just wanted to get home to her own bed. "What is it that you want? I'm tired of this game."

"So why don't you agree? And this can all over," he said as his fingers left the case. "You won't have to be in this time anymore. I can make the pain stop and this can be over with. No more guilt, Stark. I can save you."

Maybe, if she ignored him, he would go away. With a deep breath, she picked up the case and stepped to one of the work benches. She didn't know if it was her or not, but the case felt light in her hands. _Just tired, Stark,_ she thought to herself as she lifted the case onto the table. She snapped opened the case, trying not to pay any attention to the 'god'.

"That device won't help you," he replied.

Toni glanced at him from the corner of her eyes before she looked down at the device. For a few seconds, she found herself staring at the device.

Loki stepped to her left, getting within inches from her. "You have nothing to fear. Agree and I can save you from this hellhole," he replied.

"I know how to get home. I don't need you."

"And how is that, Stark?"

As she started to exam the device, she realized a component was missing. It was the core that was missing, and she couldn't help but blame her father, though she knew it might not be his fault. "When you put two Starks together, magic happens." However, even with the 'magic', she was going to kill her father if he took the core. What was he trying to do? Stop her? Help her? Just being an ass?

"Magic?"

"Too bad it isn't strong enough to mute you. Your voice's like nails on a chalk board," she said as she leaned over the table.

"My voice-" Loki started but was unable to finish as the door to the lab opened silencing him. Out of habit, Toni's heartbeat raced as she glanced up, expecting Madame Hydra to walk through the door. Yes, she knew it was highly unlikely and it couldn't be her, but she couldn't help it. Her stalker was also still out there and there was no doubt that they were still after her to give her to Loki, who was right there. This could all be a trick to get her where he wanted.

However, it wasn't the Commander, which was what her brain had told her the second she heard the door. It was Colonel Phillips and he was staring at her with his normal frown. "Hello, Colonel," she said, trying to get her heartbeat down. She hated how jumpy and depressed she was lately. Even a glass of water could send chills through her.

"So no calling me Salty?" he asked as he stepped into the room.

"Nicknames are for friends," she replied, looking back to the device. It was his order to put her under, and for that, she was mad at him. He didn't care about her nightmares, that she couldn't sleep, or that she was haunted by the death of everyone around her. He just didn't care. He didn't care what he had done to her.

"So I just needed to make you angry to get you to drop the Salty? I should've done this sooner," he said with a smile. He stepped closer to the table.

Toni glimpsed toward spot that Loki had been standing. Like always, he was gone as if he was never there, and it unnerved the genius, but she let it go. She had other things to worry about. "The core is missing."

"When Howard wasn't at your side, he was messing with this device," he replied. "He believes the Tesseract will help you get to your time."

She glanced up at him as he finished his sentence. "So he told you," she said slowly. She wasn't surprised that Howard telling Phillips, but she was surprised at Phillips' calmness. She expected him to be mad that Howard knew but nothing.

"He did, and let me tell you, he gave me an earful. Wanting to know long I knew and what I was thinking sending his daughter behind enemy's lines. He was very protective and I thought he was going to hit me for a second, but that would have ended with him eating dirt," the Colonel said, putting on a smile. "However, I never agreed or denied that you were in fact his daughter, but nevertheless."

Toni glanced up at him as she kind of wanted to see that fight. "So are you going to let me use the Tesseract?" she asked.

"Shouldn't you be resting?"

"Can I use it? I don't need it for long. Just need long enough to tap into its energy," she said, silently thanking her father for the theory. However, she doubted that she would ever tell her father that.

Phillips eyed her as he stepped to her side. "How do you plan to use it?" he asked.

Needing some breathing room, she side stepped away. "How is not important," she replied, not having any interest in explaining what she was planning. "However, I do need the core back as well."

For a few minutes, he watched her as she crossed back to Howard's equipment and eyed the metal cases. He observed her as she opened a random case and looked in. He perceived how her expression change as she stared at the equipment inside. "Going back to your time isn't going to fix everything. The pain won't just go away."

Toni knew that, but denial was her best friend and it would help her hide, which was something that she was good at. "Only people with nicknames can lecture me," she replied, as she shut the cases.

"You're impossible," he replied.

"In my DNA," she said with a smirk.

"Remind me to slap that gene out of your father before you're born," the Colonel said, with a smile.

It was clear that he was trying to get some kind of smile from her, but Toni was in no mood. She especially wasn't in the mood to deal with him. "I-"

"Hey, I love that gene," a voice said from the doorway.

Toni let out a sigh as she glanced toward the doorway to see her father and Peggy. For losing Rogers, Peggy looked like she was functioning well unlike Howard, who looked like a mess from his hair to his clothes. It reminded her of the long nights that her father would spend in the labs after her mother's death. It was disheartening to see him like that. "I think you need more beauty sleep, Stark," Toni replied.

He made a face at the sound of his last name. "I had enough beauty sleep, and I'm glad Peg woke me. Didn't want to you to leave without saying goodbye."

Toni glanced between the three of them before her eyes rested on the door. "So you did take apart my device and took the core?" she said, slowly as she tried to calm herself as she said it.

Phillips stepped forward as he rubbed the corner of his eyes with his hand. "Does this mean Agent Carter knows?" he asked, before Howard could open his mouth. "Can't anyone in this damn organization keep a secret?"

"So you are admitting it now?" Howard asked.

"Nope, I admit nothing," Toni said, quickly. "However, that's was why Fury never let me join his super-secret boy band." She said, still not looking up. She hadn't meant to tell Peggy the truth; it just came right out in her frustration.

"Isn't that admitting it?" Howard asked, stepping toward with his eyes trained on her. "And who's Fury?"

"A scary pirate," she replied. "And it is not an admittance of anything."

"A what?" Howard asked, clearly confused but yet still wearing a smile.

Phillip let out a groan. "Don't answer that," he said to Toni, who was eyeing her device.

Peggy stepped passed Howard to Phillips. "You all expect me to believe she's from the future? I have seen a lot of things, but that's a bit extreme."

Toni took a deep breath as she pushed away from the table. "Can we just skip this part and someone- hint, hint, Stark- gives me back my core, so I can go home? I so need some Shawarma," she replied, looking at her father.

"She keeps calling me Stark. It is bothersome," Howard replied with a pout. "However, Shawarma?"

"You two aren't seriously believing this? That she's Howard's Daughter? For one, I don't think Howard would ever settle down," she replied, irritated. "However, if I think about, I'm surprised that Howard doesn't have ten children with ten different woman already."

"Hey, Hey," Howard protected, waving his hands. "Not in front of my kid. She doesn't need to know this…However, I know how to protect myself."

Toni's eye twitched as there were a few things that she never wanted to know or think about. Her father's sex life was at the top, followed by Fury's sex life. However, if she thought about, she wouldn't want to know about Romanoff and Clint's either…or Bruce's with anyone. "Can I go home?" she asked, rubbing her forehead. "So don't want to hear this."

"Hints, why I took the core, so you wouldn't leave without saying bye… Well, also I wanted to give my hand at, since I now know what it does," he said.

The genius from the future let out a chuckle, because she should've expected that from her father, who would always seem smarter than she. However, she also smiled because of what she had said to Loki before. It was like magic when her father and she put their minds together.

Phillips let out sigh. "I guess I should be happy that my base is still in one piece."

Peggy looked between the three of them, just observing the three of them as they talked. It was clear that she was scrutinizing and analyzing every word that they were saying.

"Just as long as I get to go home," she replied, realizing that she kept saying home. Before the avengers, she never thought she would consider any place home. "And away from you people."

Howard raised an eyebrow. "That doesn't mean you'll get away from me. I'll probably hug you or something once you returned."

Toni could feel Phillips' eyes on her as Howard spoke. Though she didn't tell Phillips very much about her relationship with her father, he had a pretty good idea of how it was like. It was no secret that she hated the guy, though she supposed she couldn't still say that she still hated him. It was a mild dislike. "Who says? I could be the one of ten kids you don't know about," she replied. "…Ten? Maybe more? Seriously, think about."

"Geez, does everyone think as me as the town-"

Toni cut Howard off before he could finished. "Join the club," she replied, closing the case.

Howard turned to her and gave her a sharp look. "What does that mean?"

She let out a laugh as she never had an overly protective father growing up, worried about her womanhood like other kids. "It means what it means," she said.

Both Peggy and Phillips laughed. "You know what they say about a daughter?" the Colonel inquired. "A punishment to the father for all of his sins."

Howard's eyes widened. "No," he protested. "Never! I'm never letting you out of my sight." He reached for Toni and pulled her toward him into a hug.

Toni struggled against her father, who seemed to have a death grip on her. "Hey! You can start with mini me, and not adult me. I can protect myself."

"What?" Howard uttered, shocked. "Who would…Who do I need to…?"

"No, I need to protect you from all of those delinquents, and let me tell you, this camp is full of them," he replied.

Phillips laughed. "Not all of my men are delinquents," he replied, sharply.

"I disagree," Peggy interjected. "Some of man are. And besides, aren't you calling the pot black, Howard, with the number of sexual partner that you had?"

Toni eyed him. "Yea, so it is okay that you sleep around but not me? Geez, double standard."

Howard gave her a look. "That's different."

"How so, Father?" she asked, stressing the word, while narrowing her eyes at him.

Her father glanced at her before looking at Peggy, who was also staring at him. "Because I'm a bloke."

Toni knew that was the norm for this time, but it annoyed her. "Oh, I see. So you can be-what do they call it now?-a Lounge Lizard or a horny dog, but I can't?"

Phillips chuckled. "Don't think you get think you are getting out of this one, Stark."

The Elder Stark glared at the Colonel before he turned to Toni. "That's isn't what I meant."

"Then what did you mean?" Peggy asked.

"I'm changing my answer," Howard said loudly. "She's my daughter. That's why."

"But she would be taking after you!" Peggy replied, with a chuckle.

"No! Only man that I approve of, and let me tell you, I have high standards for any child of mine."

As this conversion went on, she was still angry – she wasn't the property of her father! – but she wasn't as angry as before. This conversion had turned into a fun game and Toni did find herself enjoying it, but she had enough. She just wanted to get her device and go home. "Can we all stop talking about my sex life, geez?" It made her wished that she had one, as she couldn't remember the last time she had sex, which was pretty bad. She did not go through dry spells like this. "Besides none of those guys are kinky enough for me."

Both Howard and Phillips' eyes widened at the words sex and kinky as if a woman did not say those things. Peggy let out a sigh. "Okay," she said slowly. "She's definitely your child."

Before, Toni would've taken insult to that; however, she couldn't find it in herself to be insult, not after all of the time that they had spent together. Howard still annoyed her though. "Geez, you know how to insult a person." She glared at her before she turned to Phillips. "Can I get the core and Tesseract so I can go home, where I won't be insult? Plus, I would enjoy sleeping in my bed," She asked, struggling against Howard, who still hadn't let go. "And can you let me go?"

"I don't know if I feel comfortable letting that cube out of my sight," Phillips said, eyeing Toni. It was clear that she was fighting to stay steady on her feet, even with Howard helping to support her.

Toni may not like working with her father or even talking to Phillips right now, but she was willing to do both if it meant going home. "I would suppose you and Stark would be there to make sure nothing explodes."

"Oh, so you will let me help?" Howard asked, eyeing Toni as he let her go.

"Well, you worked hard on the device. It would be a waste for you not to help," she replied. "Plus, I doubt you would give it to me if I don't accept your help."

Howard laughed. "Probably."

Toni let out a sigh. "How did I know?" she asked, jokingly.

Peggy chuckled. "I think Steve would've had a kicked out of this," she replied looking between the two. There was a hint of sadness in her voice, but there was a smile on her face.

However, it was a kick to Toni's stomach as it was a reminder that their pain was her fault. She was allowing this to go on, and she didn't deserve to kid around while they suffered. She hated herself right then.

"Toni."

Her fists balled at her side as she thought about all of the pain that she had caused. It was sickening to think of how many people she could've saved, while she did nothing and allowed them to die. She had allowed Bucky to die, without even warning him. How could she do that to a supposed friend?

"Toni."

Said genius jumped when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Her heartbeat raced as she glanced up to see Peggy, trying to offer some kind of support. It shocked Toni how comforting the Agent was, when she was in so much pain after losing the Captain, a man that she loved. "I'm fine," she replied, stepping out of Peggy's hand.

"Toni." Peggy said again.

"I'm fine, Peg," she replied. "Let's just do this. We'll need an isolated spot in case this reacts like it did the last time."

Howard exhaled slowly. "That ten foot range of the device is very stable, so we just need to find a place away from the prying eyes."

Phillips stepped passed Howard to the open metal case. He reached for the device and slowly started to put it away. "I have a place in mind," he said, catching a look from Toni. "However, I would supposed it would be best for Stark to rest first."

Howard laughed. "Got to get use to someone else having out my last name."

Toni let out a sigh, not used to Phillips calling her Stark in front of people; however, she rather enjoyed hearing it instead of Sark. She missed her last name, which had opened so many doors for her. "I don't want _your_ kind of rest," she replied, coldly, as she glared at him. She also didn't like him touching her device, but she didn't make any move to stop him. It was useless without the core anyhow.

"We needed you to rest as you were-are running yourself into the ground, and I knew it was the only way to get you to rest," he replied.

"Trust me, that isn't how," she snapped. "Just tell me where you want to do this, and I'll meet you there." She said as she turned to the door. She needed to get out as she was ready to snap at the next person who tried to tell her what to do. Her temper was getting the better of her, and her exhaustion was making it all worst.

"Toni," her father called as she took a step out of the room. As she stepped down the hall, she was surprised that no one chased after her. She would have surely thought the Howard of time would have chased after her, though she would have to guess that Peggy stopped him. The Agent always knew what she needed.


	29. Chilling Metal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FIRST I WOULD LIKE TO SAY: Don't get use to back to back updates. Haha. You are just lucky.
> 
> Lucky that Wintersupersoldiers got it back to me soo soon.
> 
> Anyhow, here you go. I hope you like. Remember Reviews are your friends
> 
> And yes, more guilt in this chapter.

* * *

**Chapter 29:**

**Chilling Metal**

* * *

Toni found herself staring at a big white sign for a countless amount of time. She didn't know how long she was staring at the sign, but it felt like it was a while. She felt the passing of time as the sun changed location in the sky.

Maybe, it was the big block letters that caught her attention. Or maybe it was the red letterings, warning people to keep out. Maybe, it was the name on the sign that caught her eyes as this was where it all begun in a sense. This was where the American Icon was chosen.

This was Camp Lehigh.

This was where hundreds of men trained to have a chance at become a super soldier. Though the Camp was pretty much a ghost town with guards only at the perimeter of the camp, it struck Toni as odd that the camp was so empty so soon after a war, but she supposed there was no need for it when the Super Soldier Project was dead.

"It's different then I remember," Toni distantly heard Peggy say. The agent was speaking softly, but her voice drafted through the air as there was nothing to drown out the sound. Phillips said something in reply, but Toni paid no attention as she stared at Peggy.

Toni was finding it difficult to read to the Sassy Agent, who seemed to be holding herself together in the misty of everything. The genius from future hadn't even stepped a foot in this camp before, and yet, she could see the memories of this camp. She could see Rogers as he tried to keep up with the rest of the men. She could see the other soldiers being cruel to Rogers as he struggled. She could see it all in her mind, and she was barely keeping it in, but yet, Peggy seemed unfazed by their surroundings. It was impressive.

"Are you okay?"

Toni was snapped out of her thoughts by a hand on her shoulder. "Peachy," she replied as she glanced at her Father, who was staring at her. She wasn't in the mood to speak, but she was quite proud at herself for not flinching. "How are you, Mr. Stark? Not too tired from those late nights?" she asked with a smirk that was her façade.

Howard's groaned as his hands dropped from her shoulder. "I think I prefer you hating me; then at least, my daughter wouldn't be joking about my sex life," he replied with a scrunched nose.

She patted him on the shoulder before she picked up her pace. "I would've teased you either way," she said with a chuckle as she stepped toward Phillips and Peggy. They were making their way toward the center of the camp, trying to put some distance between them and the guards posted at the gate. "However, it would've been much worse."

Her father let out a chuckle as he followed. "So maybe I'm lucky."

"Or maybe, not," she said, stepping to Phillips. Toni wasn't interested in Peggy and Phillips' conversion, but she wanted some space between her and her father. Her emotions were all over the place and she didn't want him to see the battle going on in her mind, though she doubted that anyone was buying that she was sane at the moment.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

In the middle of the camp stood a flag pole, and even if the camp was empty, the flag was flying high. Not far from the pole, a dirt line was drawn into the ground in a circle pattern. In the middle of it, Toni's device laid opened with loose wires not yet connected traveling away to a machine shaped like a podium, where Howard was working. Around him were cases of different shapes and sizes, and each were opened as her father worked from all of them. He was silent, focused.

For a while, Toni just watched him, seeing how much he enjoyed what he was doing. She could see the happiness in his eyes as he worked, and it hit her. For the longest time, she had thought that he had hidden in his labs to hide from her. She thought he couldn't stand to be around her after her mother's death, but as she watched him, she realized it wasn't that. He hid for the same reason that she hid. He hid in the labs as it was the only place that brought him peace, which was the same with her.

Though she hated to admit it, they were very much alike and he probably would've understood her the best if he hadn't died. He would've understood her need to be in the lab often as they shared a lot of the same characteristics. If her mother hadn't had died when Toni was so young, her father might've not retreated into the labs and might've been her best bud. He might've been that protective father that she saw on TV and was always jealous of.

Toni shook her head as she tried to focus on her device so she wouldn't be shocked again.T She had lost count of the number of times she had been shocked. A part of her blamed her father, since he was the one who added a low resolution interface; however, she knew it would give her better control of the time that she would end up in.

"Stark."

She felt her heart skip a beat, feeling someone behind her. She couldn't get over how jumpy she had become since this whole experience, and it annoyed her. She hated being so weak that even a glass of water could freak her out, and now a mere shadow could do the same. Maybe she could talk to Clint, who would tease her endlessly, but he would give her some pointers without questions. "Colonel," she replied as she welded a wire to a core.

"Can I speak to you?" he asked.

Toni glanced up at Colonel Phillips, who was staring at her. Her eyes drifted to the metal suitcase that was handcuffed to his left hand, knowing what was in the case. She also knew that he was going to hold onto it until the very last second. "What's up, Colonel?" she asked with no interest in referring to him as Salty anymore. Sure, the nickname started out of annoyance, but it grew into fondness, which was now gone.

"We need to talk."

"I'm starting to think you don't want me to leave," she replied as she fought her urge to sleep. She hoped he couldn't see how exhausted she was as she didn't want _him_ to see it. She didn't want to be forced back into a hospital bed, because that sleep was not restful, even if she needed it.

"Trust me, I want you to leave. Can't deal with two Starks in one time," he replied with a smile.

Toni frowned at him before glancing at her father, who was talking to Peggy. "…Fine," she replied, pushing herself up from the ground. "Let's talk," she said, as she dusted the dirt off her.

Phillips stepped away from her and the device, putting some distance between them. After eyeing him for a few seconds, Toni set the welding tool in her hand down on the ground and followed. Once the Colonel was sure they could talk in peace, he turned back to Toni. "How are you really?"

"I'm peachy," she replied, as she narrowed her eyes at him. It was the same answer that she had given her father, and it would be the same answer that she would give Phillips.

"I said really. How are you _really_?"

"What do you want?" She asked as she stared at him, daring him to say something. She was ready to pounce on whatever he said. "…I need to get back to the device," she replied with a sigh.

Phillips groaned. "You won't make me regret sedating you. You needed to sleep."

Her eyebrow rose. "Wasn't trying to; however, if it's working, then good," she replied, sternly. "Now, if that's all."

"Toni," he said, firmly. It was clear he was not in a playing mood.

Her hands balled at her side. He didn't get to do this, after he basically tranquilized her. He didn't listen to what she wanted; she didn't want to sleep. Why couldn't he understand that? Why wouldn't he listen? Sure, she didn't want to explain it, but why couldn't he? "Okay," she replied slowly, thinking of ways to change the subject. "I guess that we need to talk about getting you a date. I mean, you must be jealous of Stark and all of his-"

"Toni," he said sternly.

"Yes?" She tried sound as innocent as she could.

"If this is what having a child is like, I'm glad I didn't have any," he replied.

She let out a chuckle. "You would be lucky to have a child like me," she replied, trying to ignore the guilt rising up in her. She had no right to joke after what she'd done. "Besides I could hook you up with that Commander from HYDRA. She seems like a total joy." If Toni never saw that woman again, it would be too soon.

"Yea, and I bet her idea of a good date would be torturing you, though I would be up for that," he said.

Toni's smile faded and for a few long seconds, she was quiet, deadly silent, unsure of how to respond. How could he say that after everything that happened? Didn't he know what that woman had done? "Okay, you reached your limit for the day, Colonel," she snapped, coldly. "If that's all, we have to get this set up." She glared at him before turning to walk away.

However, she didn't even take a step before Phillips grabbed her arm, stopping her. She yanked her arm, trying to break his grasp. "Let go," she demanded loudly, drawing the attention of Howard and Peggy.

Phillips' grip loosen, but he kept a grip on her arm. "I'm sorry," he said, softly. "I was out of line."

Toni stared at him for a few seconds before looking away. "Just let go," she snapped, feeling something grow inside of her. She refused to call it a panic attack, but she felt it rise up inside of her. She didn't like the idea of someone touching her without her permission; no one had the right to touch her.

The Colonel's hand dropped to his side. "I didn't mean to."

"Just don't touch me," she replied, looking over to her father, who placed down his wretch and took a step toward them. There was a look of protectiveness on his face as he stared at them. It was an odd expression to see on his face directed towards her.

Phillips let out a sigh as he took a step back. "I didn't mean to upset you. My mouth got the better of me." He looked at her before he glanced over to Howard, giving him a look. She didn't say anything, as she stared between them. "We'll get her. As we speak, the Howling Commandos are hunting her down. They'll find that female Commander."

Toni wasn't sure if it matter anymore if they found the Commander, because she would be gone, always from her evil grasp. But, it did matter. She wouldn't feel safe until that Commander and her Stalker were caught. "Okay," she uttered, not sure if it was a good idea to keep recent activities of the stalker a secret. However, she wasn't sure if he was working with Loki, and if the Stalker was working with Loki, she couldn't tell any of them.

Phillips let out a sigh. "There was a reason why I wanted to speak to you."

"Later," she replied, turning from him.

"Hold on a second," he replied, reaching into his pocket with free hand. "I wanted to give these to you."

She narrowed her eyes at him as she watched him pull out a box. "What is it?" she asked as she stared at the little gray box. It was too big to be a ring box, though she wouldn't have any idea of why he would give her jewelry of any kind.

"Take it and see," he said, holding out the box.

"I don't like being handed things." Toni narrowed her eyes at Phillips, who only stared back. "That's what I have an assistant for." However, after a few long minutes of just staring at each other, she sighed and reluctantly took the box from his grasp. "If you're proposing to me, what took you so long?" she asked, as she stared at the box. "You know what they say."

"Just open it," he replied, infuriated.

She gave him a long look before opening the box, and she froze as she stared at two sets of dog tags. Without looking, she knew who both of these sets belong to. However, she didn't understand how they were in the boxes as they should have gone down with Barnes and Rogers. "I don't understand," she said, unable to take her eyes off them. "How can you have these?" She asked, feeling herself tremor. The tags felt chilling to the touch, and she felt colder with each second that she touched them.

Phillips smiled, sadly. "They're just copies of them, which I had made you. Perks of being a Colonel." He paused as he looked at them. "I thought you would like them."

Yes, they weren't really _theirs_ , but these tags struck her heart. "Thanks," she said, staring at Bucky's tag. Though she was grateful to have something to remember him by, she wasn't sure if she had a right to wear it. She let him die, just like she allowed Steve to go down. She closed her eyes, remembering the last conversions that she had with both of them. Would Steve still call her special? Would Bucky still tell her that he would come back to her? She wasn't sure, and she couldn't blame them.

"Toni," Phillips uttered

"I need some air," she said, closing the box and slipping it into her pocket. She all but ran away from Phillips who let her leave without saying a word.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

It had started to rain in the last few minutes, and the wooden step that Toni was sitting on provided no cover from the storm. She could've moved from the steps on to the porch, but she didn't have the will to move, even if the rain was so hard that it felt like she was being pelted by halt from a heavily snow storm. However, at a few long minutes of just sitting there in the rain, she forced herself up but didn't go far. She stepped back and took a seat on a higher step. She didn't know if she was punishing herself or if it was because the cold was the only thing she could feel.

Even with her heavy military coat, Toni was freezing, but she felt alive as if it was the only thing keeping her in the real world. Her eyes were focused on the closed gray box that fit perfectly in her hands; the box seemed to mock her. _They_ were gone and she was just left with replicas of their tags. What right did she have to these? Did the Colonel expect her to keep them and wear them?

She didn't know if she could bring herself to wear or even hold them, but she wasn't sure if she could give them back to him. She didn't know if she could part with a connection to the men. Sure, she would see Steve again, but he would be Rogers again, not her shrimp. It would be different, and she would lose the relationship that she had with him. Even now, she missed their late night conversions in his apartment where they just talked, talked about anything.

She was pathetic, wasn't she? She was mourning two relationships that she didn't want in the first place, that were destroyed because of her. What right did she had to mourn? She had no right at all and she knew it, but yet, here she was, mourning.

As Toni closed her eyes to think, she heard footsteps, swishing in the mud. She knew who it was before she opened her eyes and fought to ignore the growing warmth in her heart knowing it was him. "Howard," she uttered as she opened her eyes.

"Toni."

"Howard."

"Toni."

Toni let out a painfully sad laugh as she watched him step to her. "Why are you here?" she asked, not wanting to be bothered. She wanted to be alone to her thoughts, though she knew it would be unwise. Her mind was never a safe place when she was like this. However, she could peg the question: was it ever safe?

"To tell you we're waiting until the rain stops before we start."

"Okay," she replied, hating that she had left this all up to her father.

Howard let out a sigh as he took a seat next to her. "You can talk to me." His arm flinched at his side as he struggled not to touch her.

"I'm fine," she replied, glancing down at his shaking hand. "And no I can't."

"Why is that?" he asked, sounding hurt.

She glanced at his face before she looked back down at the box. She couldn't talk to him for the same reason why she didn't tell Barnes and Rogers the truth. "I can't talk to anyone."

"Why?"

Toni squeezed the box. "Have you not seen any time traveling movies?" she questioned, sadly but with a smile.

"Not recently. Not big in this time," he said with a chuckle.

She closed her eyes, but her grip did not loosen on the box. She didn't reply, hoping her silent would clue enough for him to leave her alone; however, Howard did not move from her side for what seemed like hours. He just sat there in silence next to her, staring at the rain, and it wasn't until the rain let up that Howard spoke again.

"What's in the box?"

She glanced her him before looking out into the camp. "A gift from Phillips."

Howard glanced down at the box. "Was that why you freaked out on him?" he asked.

Toni looked at him. "No," she said plainly.

Again, he allowed the silence to overcome them as he looked away, but this time it wasn't him who broke the silence. It was Toni as she opened the box. "ID tags," she uttered.

"What?"

"ID Tags," she repeated. "It's what's in the box."

Howard glanced at the now opened box and focused on the metal tags inside. "Dog tags," he said, staring at the engraving in the metal. He was unable to read the names, but he didn't need to read the tags to know who they belonged to. "Rogers and Barnes?"

"Yes."

He leaned forward as his hands twitched in his lap. "…Feeling guilty?" She didn't answer him as she started at his hands. "I know the feeling. It's the feeling I get each time I make a new weapon. Sure, I feel excitement for creating something new, but guilt follows as I wonder if I just signed someone's death certificate. I know I'm going this to save lives, but it's _still_ someone's child that I'm killing."

It felt like someone had knocked the air out of her lungs. It was how she felt when she had made weapons for the military. It was one of the reasons why she stopped making weapons after she was tortured. She had seen what her weapons had done. "You didn't pull the trigger," she replied, knowing it wouldn't help. But it was what she had been told.

Howard let out a sigh. "I tell myself that every night, but I can't seem to make myself believe it."

"And you can't tell anyone, because you know they wouldn't understand," she said slowly. "So you hide it, because no one should be burdened with it. Besides who would want to know anyhow?" She glanced back to the box. She acted the way she did, not wanting anyone to see how broken she was. "Maybe, if I act happy, I would really be happy." She said, slowly and softly.

"Yes," he replied.

"So that's why you sleep with all of those women?" she asked, with a small smile.

He shook his head with a chuckling sigh. "Well, those times were fun, and… I can't believe I'm admitting that to my daughter," he said, still playing with his hands.

Toni shook her head. "Don't need to worry about little old me. Not like I don't already know," she uttered. Both allowed silence to fallen upon them again, and it wasn't until the rain stopped completely that Toni spoke again. "At least, you enjoyed it."

"Well…it does eventually lead me to you, so no matter what, it gives me the most important thing in my life," he said, leaning back.

"…You just found out that you're my father and you're already saying that? After everything? I know I pissed you off more times than not," she said, staring at him.

He shrugged. "I think that normal for a parent-child relationship," he said, his hands still twitching in his lap.

Toni wasn't sure as she didn't have a normal relationship with her father. "I would suppose you would be right," she replied.

"I'm always right," he said, with a grin.

"Hey, that's my line," she said, her eyes drifted down to his hands. Again, silence fell, but once more, she was the first one who broke it. "I'm surprised that you hadn't touched me yet."

Howard let out a sigh before he glanced down at his hands. "I saw how you reacted to Phillips."

She closed her eyes. "He shouldn't have grabbed me," she mumbled. "He also shouldn't have sedated me and forced me to…" She shook her head as she drifted off. She didn't want to think about her nightmares as they plagued her enough.

"He thought what he was doing was correct," Howard said, fighting every urge to reach out to her.

Toni's hands tightened around the box to the point it hurt. "You agree with him?" she asked, fighting back the anger that was struggling to break free.

"No," Howard said, and Toni could tell him that he was sincere.

Her grip loosen on the box and glanced over to him. "Why?"

Howard reached for her left arm and hovered it there for a few seconds before he clasped her arm in a sign of support. "Your guilt. It's eating you alive."

"It's my fault," she uttered as she stared at the box.

"No," he said. "It's not. They died because of the war. Not you."

"Why don't you understand? I could've changed everything. I could've kept them alive. I could've told them." She closed her eyes as she felt her heart race. "Why don't you hate me?" she asked, as she leaned in to his touch. She couldn't understand why he was being so gentle and nice to her. "I hate me."

His hand dropped from her arm so he could pull her into an embrace. He wrapped his arms around her and nestled her head under his chin. "I could never hate you. Maybe, mild dislike in your teenage years, but never hate. There's nothing you can do to make me hate you, Toni."

She buried her face in her father's chest. He had no idea of how badly she needed a life line or how bad she needed this, but she couldn't understand why he was here. He should hate her. He should want nothing to do with her, like so many others. Maybe, it was because he didn't know everything that she did. He didn't know where Rogers was and that she could lead them right toward him. He could be back with them.

However, she couldn't. She couldn't lead them to Rogers for the fear of the future, even if he would've liked this time better. "I…know where…Rogers went down," she said, between her sobs. She may not have been on the task or the job, but she had seen the files. She had seen where he had went down. "I can…lead you to…him….." She drifted off again as she brought the box to her chest. "B-but I can't."

Howard's grip tightened around her. "I know, Toni. I know," he said, his voice trembling.

"You must hate me."

"No, I don't," he said, quickly. "Never hate."

She couldn't understand why he still wasn't mad at her. Anyone else would be mad at her. "I could've stopped it," she replied into his chest.

"I know, but there was a reason why you didn't. Though no one could name all of the risks, it would set something off," he said, rubbing her back. "I'm not a time traveler, but I think that is rule one of the hand book, right? I might need to look at your rulebook to see, though." He added a laugh.

How could he be making a joke about this? "I wish I had a book," she replied, sadly. "I would've known what to do."

"Not your fault," he said.

"But-"

"He's right, Toni. It isn't your fault," Peggy said, interrupting them. The way she talked and walked, it was clear that she was unsure of herself. "No one blames you. _I_ don't blame you."

Toni didn't retracted from Howard's arms, but she peaked out toward Peggy, who was trying to sport a smile but failing. "I don't know how any of you can say that." Tears streamed down her face.

"Because it's true," the agent stated, stepping toward them. "I know what both Barnes and Steve meant to you and how hard this is for you, but you don't have to feel guilty. We each would have done the same thing."

The gray box suddenly felt heavy in her hands. "I'm sorry, Peg."

"No, don't be sorry, Toni," Peggy stated. "There's only one person who should be sorry and that is Schmidt."

"And he's already dead," Howard added.

It would've happened anyhow with or without her, which was what she told herself; however, she couldn't believe it. She had done so many things in her life, and she had hurt so many people. How could this be any different? However, this time it was Peggy and her father telling her this, and she knew she could believe them, especially Peggy, who would never lie. She would never steer her wrong. "Okay," she said, slowly pushing herself off Howard.

"I know the guys would want you to have these," he said, tapping on the box.

Toni glanced back at the box before looking at Peggy, who was eyeing them. "Okay," she said, still feeling unsure. It was that feeling that silenced her. It was that time that she used to think.

After a few seconds of silence, she took a deep breath as she looked between Peggy and Howard. Her tears had stopped and she did feel better after the talk with her father, but she knew she had a long day ahead of her. "So let's stop sitting here and get me home," she said, trying to put on a smile.

Howard's arms dropped to his side as Toni pushed herself up. He eyed her red face and nodded. "Yes, let's get started," he said as he got to his feet.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Toni could almost feel a weight lifted off her chest as she stared at her device. It was an amazing feeling to know that she would be home soon, and she couldn't wait to take a nice long warm shower in her full body wash. She also couldn't wait for some actual food and not this military crap that they were trying to pass as food. However, she had to remind herself that she mustn't get her hopes up. This could still blow up in her face or she would end up somewhere she didn't want to be.

"Are you okay, Stark?" Phillips asked as he stepped to her side. His hands were tucked behind his back.

"Peachy," she said as she mindlessly played with the dog tags around her neck. After the talk with her father and Peggy, she had decided to keep the tags. Her guilt was still there, but if neither Howard nor Peggy hated her, how could she blame herself? How could she hate herself? They were right. There was nothing she could have done, and she needed to believe that. She needed to let go all of this guilt as it as eating her alive.

"Is that the only thing you know?" he asked.

"For that question," she replied as she stepped toward her device, which was sitting on a metal case. Wires traveled down the side of the case and away from the device. The dirt drawn circle had been washed away, leaving a muddy mess in its place.

The Colonel let out a sigh. "You're impossible. Just like your father."

Howard let out a sigh. "Hey," he replied, as he stepped to them. "I am not impossible. I just know what I want."

Toni was barely listening to them as she played with the ID tags, which was now warm to the touch. Since taking the tags out of the box and putting them on, a second barely passed without her touching them. Even though she only had them for a few short hours, these tags already meant something to her. It felt like she keeping them close by wearing the tags. She knew she had gotten close to the both of them, but she didn't realize how close she was until Barnes' death and Steve's disappearance.

"Are you ready, Toni?" Howard asked, drawing her out of her thoughts.

She shook her head as she glanced up at him. "Trust me, I'm really. Can't wait to get your smell off me."

Howard gave her look but before he could respond, Peggy came back and said, "We're good. All of the guards are at the posts and there's no one in the camp besides us."

Phillips nodded before he stepped toward Howard and Toni, and though the dirt circle was gone, he was careful not to step within the ten foot range of the device. "Ready, Stark?"

Howard straightened up and turned to the Colonel. "Yup, just set everything up, and we are ready for action."

The Colonel's face crunched as he chuckled. "Wasn't talking to you, Stark. I was talking to the prettier Stark," he replied.

Toni had to admit that just being with these three took some of guilt way. They made it difficult to be depressed. They made her want to smile, which was shocking. She had never been this close to so many people before; however, she didn't know what she would've done without them. "Oh, thanks you, Salty," she replied. "I always have thought I am prettier."

Colonel let out a groan as Howard chuckle. "And there it is again. I hate that nickname."

"At least you got a nickname," Howard replied with a smile.

"I don't know if a nickname from Toni is always a good thing," Peggy said, as she stepped to her them. Being in heels, she stepped awkwardly on the balls of her feet.

"I think Agent Sassy Pants is amazing nickname," Toni replied, trying to ignore the pain raising up in her chest. Before his death, Barnes had complained about not having a nickname and he would tease her for one. It had turned into a game for him. "Don't be jealous." Her hands went to the dog tags and squeezed.

Howard laughed, but Colonel made a face. "I don't know if anyone would be jealous," Phillips stated.

Peggy let out a sigh. "I think we are digressing," She replied.

Phillips nodded and said, "Agent Carter is correct. Say your goodbyes." He gave Toni a look, which she knew would be the only real good bye she would get from him. He may not have liked or trust her to begin with, but she knew she had grown on him. Even after that blunder of sedating her, he had grown on her. "I'll say one thing, Stark," Phillips started, "I prefer you over your father, but it will be peaceful without you."

"Aw," Toni uttered.

"I need to get used to someone else having my surname," Howard replied.

Peggy laughed. "Don't worry, Toni," she started as she stepped into the circle. "I won't let him go too crazy when you're born."

Howard gave Peggy a look. "Crazy? It's not my fault that I have so many things to prepare for before my genius offspring is born."

Toni's eyebrow rose as she stared at her father. The second she wondered how the hell he had her when he was goof ball was the second it went out the window. She knew he had woman lined up to be with him, which made her wonder if her mother one of them. She hoped not.

"I have to start looking for the best teachers and schools," Howard started.

Peggy let out a chuckle. "Slow down, Howard. She isn't even born yet."

"Never too early to start looking for the best for my child," he countered.

"You need to find her mother first," Peggy replied, giving him a look.

Impulsively, Toni glanced toward Phillips who was staring at her intently. When they had first met, Phillips had teased her about not having matters, and Toni had let it slip that her mother had died. Now, Toni knew what that look meant: an order not to say anything. He had nothing to worry about. She wasn't going to say anything like she did with Barnes and Rogers. She was going to remain silence like the heartless person that she was.

"I'll find her," Howard said, turning toward Toni. "Going to give me some hints."

"Why don't we get started?" Toni replied, nodding toward the device.

"I might get the wrong woman to be your mother. So you want to tell me who she is? And besides, if you don't like your name, I can always change it," he said, stepping to her.

At first the joking was fun, as it helped her forget about her pain, but now, the jokes were getting to be too much. She needed them to stop. "No, I think I'm good. What fun would it be if you don't find her for yourself? And I think the world would drop into madness without a Toni Stark," she said.

"Think highly of yourself, do you?" Howard asked, watching her as she mindlessly played with Rogers' and Barnes' tags.

"Well, dear O', Dad," Toni started, "I take after you." Her mind started to drift toward future Rogers and wondered whether he had seem the similarity between her father and her.

"Oh, god," Peggy uttered, pretending to be scared. "That's scary. You will definitely need your Aunt Peggy."

"Aunt?" Howard started. "Wouldn't want the honor of being the mother of my child?"

"You're unbelievable, Howard," Peggy replied with a chucking sigh.

Howard laughed. "Well, if Toni gave me a clue."

Toni's nerves kept growing as she wanted to get this over with. She glanced toward Phillips for some kind of support, but his glances were only warning. "Peggy is so not my mother. Too classy for you." Her heartbeat was racing, putting yet another stain on her tired body.

"Geez, Toni. Tell me what you really think of me," her father said, playing hurt.

However, Toni could tell it was more than just playing hurt, which struck her, and for a few minutes, Toni's nerves left as she took in her father's guilt. She wasn't sure what he was feeling, but she had no doubt he was thinking of his short coming. It was no secret that they had a bad relationship, which she had made clear with her actions. She even admitted to him that she had lost her father to his company. Now, he knew that she lost him to the company.

"Not everything is about you, Howard," Peggy said, glancing between the two before she stepped to Toni. It was clear that she had seen his pain as well. "In the beginning, Toni, I wasn't your fan and I didn't trust you," Peggy stated, changing the subject. "I was ready to write you off, and I was annoyed when Phillips didn't, but now, I see that I was mistake. I'm sorry for how I treated you."

Everything started to spin as she felt sick. Toni knew that Peggy didn't hate or blame her for what happen to Steve, but Toni still did, and to hear her say that, it was too much. "Peg, you don't have to," She said slowly.

"But I do," the Agent responded with a weak smile. "I will make it up and be there through it all." Before Toni could respond, Peggy pulled her into a hug. "Just imagine all of our girl nights together."

Toni never really had a girls' night as her father had never seen the need for a child genius to have a girls' night. "Is this where we giggle and talk about our nails?" she asked as she pushed out of Peggy's arm.

Peggy gave her a look. "Heck, no. I was thinking gun ranges."

"Then we can take over-"

Interrupting, Howard gave Peggy and Toni a look. "I think you plan to turn my child into another you, Peg."

"Is that a bad thing?" Toni asked. "Imagine it. I could take over the world."

"It-" Peggy started with a smile.

Interrupting again, Howard stepped forward. "I think Colonel Phillips is getting annoyed," he said as he nodded toward Phillips who was still staring at them. "I do think it is time."

There was still a sadness in his voice that Toni didn't like. "It is," she replied, forcing herself not to reach for the dog tags. They seemed to become so important to her in so little time.

Peggy nodded. "It is, and I can't wait to meet mini you." She gave Toni one last hug before saying her good-byes. There were some tears in her eyes, which Toni had rarely seen. "And don't forget: their deaths are not your fault, okay?" she said, staring at her. "Say it," she said sternly after a few seconds of silence.

"…It's not my fault," she replied slowly, knowing it would be a battle to believe it. Peggy smiled as she turned and stepped away from the muddy circle. She joined Phillips, who has was unlocking the handcuffs.

Taking eyes off them, Toni turned toward her father who had turned from her toward the podium. With a deep breath, she followed after him, knowing that he needed to know. He needed to know that she didn't hate him anymore. "Howard," she called.

He stopped and turned back to her. "Scared?" he asked, jokingly.

"No, never," she replied.

Howard looked at her, and it wasn't until a few seconds later that he spoke. "I'm sorry."

Toni stared at him, confused. "Sorry for what?"

He stepped closer to her, before glancing toward Phillips and Peggy. They were head deep into their own conversion, but Phillips was keeping a close eye on Toni and Howard. "Sorry for being such a horrible father."

Toni stared at him for a few seconds, comprehending what he had just said. "What?" she uttered, not expecting that from him.

"You made it perfectly clear that I was a horrible father, which isn't too surprising," he replied. "I think it runs in the family. My father wasn't the best either, but I'm going to make it up to you."

Toni had wondered before if her father had never paid any attention to her due to the fact that she was a woman and not a legacy that he wanted. Now, she knew that wasn't true. It was clear that she was enough for him. "Who said you were a horrible father?" she asked.

He gave her a look. "You did."

Toni laughed it off. "All jokes."

"Ha ha, so funny," he replied, mockingly. "I'm going to make it up to you. I'm going to be there for you, for all of your milestones." His tone changed, turning soft.

She wanted to tell him that he couldn't or shouldn't do anything differently, but she knew it was pointless judging by the look in his eyes. She also knew that if she told him not to, he would know it was the truth. "My childhood wasn't that bad," she replied. Sure, he shipped her to boarding school and she hardly saw him, but she couldn't say it was _horrible_.

"Toni," he said, clearly not believing her.

"It wasn't," she countered. "And besides, you had already made up for it… Dad." The word felt weird on her tongue, but the look on her father's face was priceless.

"You just called me dad without it being a joke," he uttered, completely shocked.

"Yeah, yeah, don't let it go to your head," she replied, waving him off. "I know I'm the prefect child."

Howard laughed as he ran his hand through his hair. "You're going to be a handful."

"You bet."

Before Toni could say another word, her father pulled her in for a hug, and it wasn't a short one. "I'm glad that you're my daughter, and I'm glad that you are you," he said. "And what Peg said, don't blame yourself, though I know you won't listen."

"Nope. I have a hard head."

"And I can't forget to sign you up for some self-defense class. I can't have my daughter getting kidnapped all the time. How many times has it been so far?"

Toni pushed herself out of her father's arms and stepped back, giving him a look. "Not you too," she replied with a long sigh. Screw Clint. She was so getting Romanoff to give her some tips, because she was not a damsel in distress. Plus, it would help her with her self-doubt. It might even help her nerves as well.

"If a father cannot tease his daughter, what else is she good for?" He laughed as he allowed her to pull out of his arms. He met her glare as she stared at him with an intense look. "Plus, it's good for you. It helps build character and keep your high horse in check." Her glare only seem to intensify. "Okay, I will quit." Howard took a step back. "However, I wished we could've talked more. I would have liked to have known you better."

"Would you now?" she asked.

"Yeah, I would have." His glance was soft.

Toni let out chuckle. "Don't worry. You can bug little me, who would probably blow you off too."

He let out a laugh. "You're going to keep me on my toes, and I look forward to it."

Even after everything that Toni had went through, it still surprised Toni to hear him say that. "Oh, really? I think you would call it quits after the first diaper."

"No, that's why I will have nannies for," he replied, chuckled.

Toni's eye twitched. "You won't get off that easy."

"I th-"

"You two are making me sick," Phillips stated, interrupting them. The loose, open handcuff rattled against the metal case as the Colonel stepped to them. "And I would rather not puke up my lunch."

Howard's eyes drifted to the case. "I guess we better get this going. We don't want this thing out in the open for too long," he said, nodding to the case.

"Then let's get this done," Toni replied, as Howard took the case from Phillips, who stepped away as soon as the case left his hands.

From there, it seemed like everything kicked into hyper drive and that time was slipping away. Toni had been waiting for this moment for such a long time that she hadn't thought that she would see the day. However, now that it was here, it felt like a dream. Was this really happening? Was this all some kind of nightmare? If it was, she was going to shit herself and never going to watch TV before bed again.

As Howard connected the Tesseract, Toni stepped back to her device and got down onto her knees. The interface that her father added would help her control the device better, allowing her to transport to the correct time. Though this was all a theory, Toni had faith that it would work. There was no way that both her father and her calculations were wrong. Now, she just needed to pick a time, and she had a day in mind.

Toni glanced toward her father, who had just finished connecting the cube and was typing away. She eyed him for a second before turning to Peggy and Phillips, who were a safe distance away. Peggy's eyes were drilling into her as Phillips nodded at her. Even if she couldn't read his mind, she knew what he was saying.

With a deep breath, she turned back to her father, who was smiling at her with that cheesy smile of his, and as he smiled, she was cursing herself. Unable to stop herself, her hand went to her neck, to the tags around her neck, and she felt herself hate growing again. Here she was going to let another person die without saying a word. She was really a heartless bitch, wasn't she? She was really going to allow him to die, just like Barnes? Why couldn't he leave her be? Why couldn't he let her hate him? Why did she have to care for her father?

However, she knew she couldn't tell him for the same reason why she didn't tell Barnes. She really was going to burn in hell, wasn't she? She suddenly felt sick again. Why did it matter if her father died on that ill-fated day in March? Would it change anything, if he didn't? _Stop,_ she thought, knowing she couldn't stop his death.

"Ready, Toni?" Howard called out.

The tags started to cut into her palm, and Toni was surprised that her hand wasn't bleeding yet. She glanced down at the tags before she spoke, "Yes."

Without another word, Howard turned on the machine, while she focused her device sitting in the middle of the mud circle. A few seconds after connecting the final wires to the device, Toni glanced up to her father and the cube, which started to shine brightly in front of him. It took mare seconds for the bright blue light to travel along the wires to the device in front of her. Toni felt her nerves grown as her device let up, shining brightly.

The interface started to flip and chip as it spun into action. The meters started to spike as the device drew in power from the Tesseract. The energy levels were rising off the charts, and the device was growing hotter with each passing second. As Toni stared at the gages, she thought the device was going to overheat and exploded. However, she knew that was what she wanted.

And just like that, the wind started to pick up and the device started to spark. Toni knew there was no stopping this now, and she needed to brace herself for impact, but as she watched her father, she stared at his smile, knowing she couldn't do this, not again. She couldn't allow another person to die as she did nothing. She didn't care about the future, which she thought was damned to begin with. Maybe, the world would be better with her father alive. "Damn, it all," she yelled, though she wasn't sure if anyone could hear her over the device.

Toni started to step to her father, and she could see everyone's shock around her. She could see the looks in their eyes telling her to stop. She would see their worries look, but she didn't let those looks get to her. "Howard," she yelled, feeling her exhaustion creep on her again. It felt like her energy start to disappear as the device powered up.

Though he did not move from the podium, she saw his mouth move in a rapid movement, but she wasn't sure if she just couldn't hear him or if she just couldn't comprehend him; however, she didn't understand him. "March 15," she yelled, barely making it a few feet. "H-Howard, M-march 15-" She yelled but unable to get the words out or maybe she did and she just couldn't hear them coming out of her mouth.

However, it was that moment that everything started to spin. It was that moment that her device spark violently, drawing everyone's attention, and it was the last moment that Toni remembered. After that moment in time, it seemed like everything stopped existing. Everything just seemed to vanish, and she was left unable to feel anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end for now.
> 
> I hope you enjoy the check.
> 
> And it also doesn't seem like Toni always gets the short end of the Stick, doesn't it? First Barnes, then Steve, and now Howard.
> 
> In the next Chapter, we shall see where Toni ends up and whether she had done any damage to the time line.


	30. Repeating Death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I am sorry that this took so long for me to post this. I was waiting for my Beta, but she has a life...well more importantly she has finals, which are more important this. So this is unbeta. Be warned. My grammar is not the best; however, I want to get this out since it took me so long to update.
> 
> Anyhow let me know what you think.

All that Toni could recall was pure and complete darkness, and for a while, she thought she was dead. She thought the Arch reactor had stopped and she had gone to hell. She expected nothing else, as she was the reason why so many people were suffering. She deserved this punishment. She deserved to suffer for the pain that she had caused.

The genus tried to move, but she get anywhere. Either her body wasn't responding, or it was responding and she wasn't going anything anywhere, which was just as scary. "Help," she screamed, trying to move in the darkness. "HELLO!" she screamed, unable to make out her hands in front of her. "Is there anyone there?" she asked yelling, her voice shaking.

Her voice echoed in the darkness, leaving her to drown in her own voice. Though she could only hear herself, it was overwhelming, and she wanted- no, needed it to stop. She couldn't think or function as the echo got louder and louder. She tried to cover her ears, trying to block it out. However, it seemed to only get worse and she thought she was going to go crazy.

"M-make it stop," she cried, unable to take it. "It h-hurts." Her ears felt like they were on fire, and if she could feel her body, she would've sworn that her ears were bleeding. It was so intense that she couldn't feel anything besides pain. If she could speak or if someone could hear her, she would plead for her death. The sound was so deafening that she could no longer hear what the echoing words were.

She couldn't tell if she was speaking, or if words were even coming out of her mouth anymore. Even if they were, she wasn't sure what she would be saying. She wasn't even sure what specific words meant anymore as her mind felt like a haze. She didn't even know her name as all she knew was pain.

However, there was one thing that she knew. Even after losing feeling of her being, she knew she was screaming. She couldn't hear her scream, hear anything anymore really, but she was screaming. It was too much and she wished that the darkness would take her away. She wished this darkness would just end her as she couldn't take it anymore. It was too much. Just too much. It was-

"St..."

The pain started to die, and words started to make sense again; however, she still felt like surrounded by a heavy misty. Her mind felt weak, exhausted. She felt like she had been awake for…god knows how long.

"Star..."

There was that voice again, calling her name if that was her name.

"Stark," the man called again, but this time she felt something on her shoulder. She flinched under the touch, which was painful, but the man only seemed to squeeze harder. "She…to…a-waking…"

With the sudden return of feeling to her body, Toni's brain was spinning, and she couldn't make out completely what he was saying. Was he even referring to her? She wasn't sure. She wasn't sure of anything besides her growing headache.

"...the device…she…awakes."

It was the same voice that had called her name, but he wasn't talking to her. He was ordering someone to do something, though Toni wasn't sure what. All she knew was that the man was picking and pulling her into his warm chest.

"What…plan...to…do?" This time it was a different voice who was speaking, and like the last one, Toni didn't recognized this voice. However, she wasn't sure if this was just a trick that her mind was playing on her.

"Need…awake," the first one said, as he patted her cheek with something wet.

Pain was coursing through her, sending tremors down her body. Toni just wanted- no, needed it all to stop somehow so she could rest; however, she did _not_ want to sleep. She didn't want to go back to that dark place. She didn't want to be alone with her guilt. Being alone was too much.

She groaned as he patted her cheek again. Why did this man keep hitting her? Did he not understand how annoying that was? "St-t-top," she muttered, her throat feeling like sand paper.

"There we go," the man said.

Toni squeezed her eyes as she suddenly felt the hot, beaming sunlight on her face. It was too bright, and she felt like her face were burning. She groaned again as she tried to move.

"Come on, Stark," the man said annoyed, his voice becoming clear. She was definitely sure now that she hadn't heard his voice before. She would've remembered his irritated voice. "We don't have time for this."

The genius was still having a difficult time putting things together. She wasn't sure of what was happening, besides the cold water running down her warm face.

"Sir," the second man started, "let's just take her and go."

"No, not the plan," the first one objected. "But get him to leave." Toni felt the man shift, like he was waving at something. "He shouldn't be here."

"I tried, but he won't leave." He sounded exasperated. "He almost attacked me."

Toni could tell the first man was furious at the second, and it worried her, but she wasn't sure why. There was no reason why she shouldn't trust the man, who was holding her. He only seemed to want her to move, which was what she wanted.

"Rollins," the first one snapped. "I don't care. Just get him out of here."

Toni could feel herself start to wonder again. Why did the first man want this other man gone? Did this man do something besides attacking Rollins? She had no idea but she knew she had to move. She had to open her eyes.

"Rumlow, he's seems interested in Stark."

The man now known as Rumlow dropped his hand from Toni's face, but he kept a firm grasp on her. "I don't care. Get him to return to base. We'll report it later."

"…Yes, Sir." Rollins responded.

Toni could hear him as he stepped away. What was it about this third man? Did he do something? Was that why Rollins sounded scared in approaching him?

Rumlow patted her face again, snapping her attention back to him. "Stark."

Her eyes flicked open, but they quickly closed as the sun beamed down on her. It was a painfully sunny day. Why couldn't they move her to a shady area? She groaned again as she tried to move but failing. She could feel herself twitched.

"Stark," the man said again.

Toni squeezed her eyes shut and forced herself to take a deep breath. She knew she was completely exhausted but she needed to found some hidden energy. She needed to figure out what was going on and how to get out of here. "F-fuck," she cursed as her head fell to the side. She groaned lightly, grateful that the sun was no longer directly in her eyes.

After a few deep breaths, Toni forced her eyes open, and with everything that she had, she kept them open. For a few long seconds, the light blinded her, but she wouldn't, refusing to close her eyes. She needed to focus, she needed to stay awake, she needed to protect herself. She concentrated. Picking a distant object, Toni stared, willing the shadow to take form. After a few long seconds of staring, it did take shape. It morphed into two shapes, and it looked, even from the distance, like the shapes were fighting.

"Time for you to get up, Stark," Rumlow said, clearly losing his patience. "We need to go."

The world around her spun again, and her head started to hurt yet again. Everything felt like it was trying to attack her and it took everything she had to keep her sanity. Still trying to focus, she stared at the two shapes, which had now turned into men. She knew she shouldn't be shocked by their presence, but she was. She was surprised by everything really. If she wasn't so exhausted, she would be amazed and laughing. She invented time travel for crying out loud; who wouldn't be dancing? Sure, she _never_ wanted to do it again, but it was something.

Rumlow grabbed her by her arms and started to stand up slowly. "Time to go," he said, looking off into the distance. His face was crunched in anger, but he didn't say anything else.

Toni's legs felt like jello beneath her, and she couldn't stay on her feet, even with the man behind her holding her up. She closed her eyes again, trying to catch her breath. She just needed rest, but she couldn't. Not here. She needed to get back to her tower. Back to her suit. "k-k," she muttered, forcing her eyes open.

Without much thought, her eyes went back to the two men. Even if they were still a haze, she was able to make out certain details, though it was a battle to keep her eyes open. She could tell it was just one of the two that was yelling. The other one was just staring at…her with such an intense look that it felt like he was drilling into her. She tried to look away, but she couldn't. There was something about him that drew her in. Maybe, it was the weird silver sleeve he was wearing, which wasn't making any sense; however, it was still interesting.

Before she could make out his face, she was pulled from her thoughts, as Rumlow lifted her off her feet, drawing her hazy attention. It was battle to look at him, as sleep wanted to pull her in. She compelled herself to look at the man, who held her, and even if she was too exhausted to think clearly, there was something about him as well. Though she didn't get a good look at him, he had a well-trimmed body and rustic look to him that Toni had to say was attracted. There was no doubt that he had the charm to go with it, but there was something off.

Her head bobbed back, resting against his shoulder. The fabric of his uniform rubbed against her face, itching, but she had no energy to adjust. It was a battle to keep her eyes open as the man held her tight. She kept telling herself that she had to stay awake that something was off about him. She had to figure out who this man was, but her brain didn't want to function.

"Relax, Stark." Rumlow ordered, calmly though irritated.

The smart ass in her wanted to say something, but she couldn't. Not only were her words distance to her, her throat was sore. Her lips were quacked, and she could taste the blood whenever she opened her mouth. What was it about time travel? It was no wonder that she was out for the week when she traveled to the past. It completely drained her.

Toni glanced up at Rumlow, whose first name was still a mystery; however, she couldn't keep her focus as her head bobbed again. Her eyes felt heavy, and she knew sleep would soon be on her no matter what she focused on. There was no keeping her awake, even if she wondered what the hell the S.T.R.I.K.E. patch on Rumlow's uniform meant.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

When Toni came too again, she didn't expect to be in a cheap hotel room, laying in a bed that probably saw more action then she had…Now, that thought gave her the willies, and she didn't want to think about the possible bugs that could be living in this room. She had heard the horror stories about cheap hotels, though if she were to be honest it wasn't just the cheap places. However, she was in denial about that. Deep Denial.

But that wasn't the point and she knew it. Now that her mind was clear, she needed to figure out where she was, and who had her. Could she be with those guys from before? She didn't think so, as they didn't seem like the type to stay in a cheap hotel. Sure, they looked like the government type, and the government wasn't one to spend the big bucks on hotel rooms, but there was no way that they were stay in a place like this. So where was she?

At least, her nightmares were gone for the night and she dreamt of nothing, absolutely nothing. Her mind was a blank. From her exhaustion, Toni fell into a deep sleep with no thought, and she was able to sleep without her terrors. She was able to sleep for once, which was a weird feeling. For her, it was weird to be rested.

Shaking her head, Toni pushed herself up by her elbows. Even with the rest, she could feel her worn-out body fight her. Her body shock, but she pushed through them. She needed to figure out where she was and what was going on. She also needed to check her reactor to make sure it was working properly, though if it wasn't she would be dead.

"You're up. I thought you would be out for days."

Toni's heart raced, not knowing that someone was in the room, and in her surprised, her arms gave way and she collapsed back onto the bed. "Shit," she cursed. Not wasting any time, she tried to push herself, but before she could, she felt a set on hands on her, keeping her stil.

"Here, let me help."

"I got this," she stared, glaring at his helping hand. She was struggling with him, not sure of who this person was.

"Relax."

Toni let out a groan, giving in and accepting his offer. "Okay, but you so need to buy me dinner first," she replied, relaxing in his grasp. With a deep breath and pushing slightly, she allowed him to get her into a sitting position.

"I think it's too late for that. You're already in bed," he said with a wink.

Even with a sore throat, Toni laughed. Why couldn't everyone joke around with her like this? Jokes were nice, a good distraction. "I'm never that _easy._ You see I love a good chase. It keeps it fun," she said with a smile, a calculated smile.

She studied the man next to him, and though this was all guess work, Toni could tell he had some kind of training. He looked like he could take on half of her highly paid, private security at the same time. He wasn't as big as half of her team, but he was built. She could see his well-defined biceps a mile away, and she had no doubt he had the abs to match as well. His dark skin flattered the tones of his muscles, and there was no denying he was an attractive man.

"Oh, does it?" he asked, not stepping back from her. "Why don't you tell me how?"

Before Toni could respond, the door to the hotel room jolted open, startling her, and before she could react or speak, two elderly men walked in. "Watch it, Trip. She's the Cap's girl," one of the older man replied.

Toni's eyebrow rose as she listened to the two old men. Did they just call her the 'Cap's girl?' She was in no way, shape or form Rogers' anything. Yes, they had a better understanding of each other, but if anyone was his girl, it was Peggy, who was his last kiss- that she knew. Besides, she didn't deserve to be his anything when she was the reason why he was trapped in this time. She was also the reason why he lost his best friend, even if no one blamed her. "Cap's girl, am I?"

"Of course, I don't think there was ever a time you weren't," the same elderly said with a smile.

Shaking her head, Toni stared at the two elderly man, not able to shake the feeling that she knew them from somewhere. Not one to make friends with elders (or anyone), she didn't know many elderly people besides the people sitting on her board of directors. "I'm not anyone's girl."

"I think it was the poker game that sold it for me," the other one said.

The words 'Poker Game' rang in her head, and she thought back to every single game she had played. There was only one that popped into her head. "Dugan, Jones, is that you? Geez, you two looked horrible. Time didn't do you two any favors."

Jones laughed. "Shit, we still got the last name treatment."

Dugan took a wobbly step forward with his tatty cane pointing toward her. "Watch it, young lady. I'm your elder."

Toni let out a weak laugh as she adjusted herself. "Me watch myself? You don't know me every well, do you?" she asked.

Trig let out a howling laugh as he stepped back and turned to Gabe and Dum Dum. "I wasn't aware you knew Toni Stark personally, Grandpa. Geez, who else do you know? Do you know the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders? If so, you should totally introduce me to me."

"Grandpa? One of you two reproduced?" Toni asked, shocked. "Who was the unlucky lady? Who do I need to send the flowers to?"

Jones chuckled as he stepped toward the end of the bed. "Hey, now," he said, also unsteady on his feet. "I was quite a catch back in the day."

"I don't know about that, Gabe," Dugan stated, leaning on his cane. "And I think Toni and I can agree on that. You were chasing the women away."

Toni took a deep breath, feeling her exhaustion creep back on her. Trying to shake it off, she placed her hands palm down on the bed and pushed up. She held herself there as her arms begun to shake beneath her. She pushed herself back into the headboard, trying to knock herself awake, but no one noticed as all eyes were on Dugan and Jones.

Jones gave Dugan a look. "Hey, I found a beautiful woman and started an amazing family. Just look at my grandson for one. I don't see you with any grandchildren."

"Why would I settle down with just one lady, when I can have many?" Dugan asked. "Besides, I do have Nancy. She loves me." He let out a chuckle, leaning on his old, wooden cane.

Toni's hands shook and gave out, and she fell back into the cheap hotel bed which felt like a rock. "Hey, now. If I can't sell tickets, there'll be no old man fight."

Trip gave her a look before shaking his head. "I don't believe my mother would forgive me if I let my grandfather get into a fight with a fellow Commando," he said, exasperated.

Jones let out a sigh as he wobbled to his grandson. Each step looked painful to the old man, but he never showed it on his face. He was all smiles. "And we can't have that," he said, rubbing Trip's bold head. "Why don't you have hair?" he teased. "This would be better if you had hair."

Toni blinked her eyes a few times, trying to keep herself awake. It was a battle that she knew she would lose again, and this time, she doubt she would have another dreamless sleep. "Hey, I think he looks good without hair. I do say he is dreamier without it."

Trip laughed. "See, Grandpa. I can't disappoint the famous Toni Stark."

Dugan's hand tightened around his cane. "Careful. I don't think Captain Rogers is willing to share."

Even in her tired status, Toni felt herself twitch. Why were they under the impression that she belonged to Rogers? That they belong together? There was nothing between Rogers and her besides pain, pain that she had caused. It was all that she did. She was the reason for so much pain in the world. "I don't know about that. Rogers loves his sharing."

"Something tells me that you'll be a hand full for Steve," Jones said.

"Wait, what does Trip do? Maybe, he could take Rogers." Jones and Dugan gave her a look. "Geez, can none of you take a joke?" she said, letting out a sigh.

Trip laughed. "I don't know about that, but I'm a Shield Agent. Agent Antoine Triplett at your service."

"I knew it! I knew you were the government type," Toni said with a first pump. She was glad that she wasn't lost her touch, after all this time. "You have that vibe to you."

"O' really. Shit," he said. "That's my worst nightmare."

"Really that's your worst nightmare?" she asked. "…Okay, that's pretty scare. Who wants to be the man?"

Trip opened his mouth, but before he could speak, Dugan took a step forward. "Trip, can your Grandfather and I have a word with Ms. Stark alone?"

Giving the three of them a look, the young man nodded. "Yes, Sir," he replied. "I'll be outside, getting the car ready to leave."

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

"So you're saying that you found me in Camp Lehigh alone?" Toni asked, trying to make sense of what was going on in her head. No, that didn't make sense because she remembered the men in uniform. She remembered the strange man with the silver sleeve…Or…maybe, it was all in her head. She was half away out of it when she came too.

"Yes," Jones said from his seat at an old, wooden table. "We found you on the ground unconscious, and for a second, we feared you were dead."

Toni's head started to hurt as she replayed the interaction with the S.T.R.I.K.E. team, trying to see if it really was all in her head. If it wasn't, then why the hell did they leave her on the ground? And who the hell was this team? "And my device?" she asked, slowly kicking her feet over the bed.

Dugan, sitting on the end of the bed, eyed her as she attempted to get up. "You need to rest, Stark." He said.

"Rest? I don't need to rest. I need to find my device." Narrowing Dugan eyes, he lifted his cane and smack her in the legs. "OUCH!" she yelled mockingly as she glared him. "What was that for?" she asked, pulling her legs to her chest.

"You _need_ to rest," Dum Dum stated, keeping his cane close. "Your father gave specific instructions."

Toni's eyes widened at the sound of that, and her heartbeat begun to race at the mention of her father. Did her warning worked? Did he hear her? Was he live? If so, where was he? She wanted to see him. She needed to see him.

"Besides," Jones started, "we didn't see any device. There were some metals shards on the ground, but that could be from anything."

Nothing that Jones said was clicking with Toni as she was focused on her father, who she was dying to see. She couldn't forget how soft and caring he was to her, when she needed it the most. "Where's my father?" she asked, unable to keep it in.

Jones and Dugan's faces fell as they glanced toward each other, giving the other a look. With a deep breath, Dugan turned toward Toni, his hand inching closer to her. He paused a few inches from her knee, as he closed his eyes. He took a deep breath before he opened his eyes again. "Toni," Dugan said, carefully.

If possible, it looked like the Howling Commando was getting older and older with each passing second. As Toni eyed him, she knew the answer to her question and she felt sick. "He's dead."

Jones lean forward, looking like he was trying to get up but failing. "Toni," he called, softly.

Toni felt her heart skip a beat, as her whole world fell on her. Sure, she knew she shouldn't have expected things to be different, but she couldn't help it. She expected her father to have listened, she expected him to be alive, but she knew she was stupid for thinking he could be alive. She was stupid for getting her hopes up, especially when she let him die. She could have warned sooner, but she didn't. "It's fine," she replied. "Just need to get back to my tower."

"Toni," Dugan called, putting his cane back in front of him.

She didn't want to deal with her emotions and she would do anything to hide from them. Her guilt was the enemy and she would find a way to rid herself of it. The first thing she would do was not talk about him. "You said my device is gone? Hopefully, it's really destroyed. If not, I'll take it bomb to it," she said, trying to put a smile on.

Jones placed a hand on the old wooden table and pushed up. "Toni."

The Genius let herself relax as she strengthened her legs. "So what were my father's instructions?" she asked. The Howling commandos gave each other a look, which Toni did not like. She was not a child, who needed protection. She would take care of herself.

"He just wanted to make sure that someone was here to meet you when you returned, and he wanted to make you didn't overwork yourself. He knew you would try to do too much too soon. He had strict list of things he didn't want you to try. Sure, he wanted it to be him to meet you to calm you down, but…" Dugan trailed off.

Oh, she knew. She didn't need them to tell her that. She didn't need for them to tell her anything else. She just needed them to get her back to the tower. "How did he know what time I would sure up in?" She ask, thinking about which time she had selected. Today was not the time she was hoping for. She was shooting for March 18.

Dum Dum gave Gabe a look before he glanced to Toni. "He rigged it."

Toni felt the air leave her lungs. "W-what?" she asked, shocked. Her brain couldn't wrap itself around what he had just said.

"He figured you might try something, so he wanted to make sure you would only end up where you're supposed to."

Toni felt her heart race. How did her father know that she was going to try to do something? How the hell did he know? Why did he keep besting her every freaking time? Why did she always lose? Even when she won, she always seem to lose. She was meant to be alone in her pain, wasn't she? "Selfish Asshole," she said, hiding her pain with her anger. Why didn't he let her save him? Did he hate her or something? What was it? "Did he not think I could do it on my own? That I couldn't do the impossible? I wish he was here so I can punch him. He denied me of my greatness. The asshole." Her tears were close to the surface, but she refused to let them out.

Dugan eyed her. "Toni, you don't have to lie."

Jones wobbled to his feet as he stepped to Toni. "We can talk about if you like?"

Talking was the last thing she wanted to do. The first was blowing up her device, if it wasn't already destroyed. The second was burning the blue prints. After that, she wanted to get wasted until she forget who she was. Oh, she couldn't wait until she could forget. She wanted to forget everything. "No, but we can talk about your grandson if you like," she said with a wink.

Dugan let out a chuckle. "I think if you ended up with Trip, Gabe would go crazy."

Jones' eye twitched. "I did not bring my grandson for you to flirt."

"So why did you bring your very attractive grandson then?" Toni asked. Yes, Trip was attractive; however, Toni was anything but attracted to him. She had no desire whatsoever to do anything with that Shield Agent, even if she acted like she did. This was just a game to Toni, so she could hide her feelings. It was one of the many masks that she worn to protect herself. She didn't know what she would without her masks. "Just to tease me?" She would need to make another mask to hide her guilt.

"No, we needed someone to drive us. Nancy wouldn't let us leave without one, and I'll never disobey Nancy," Dugan stated, soft and sweetly.

Toni's eyes twitched as the sound of his voice. It was sickly sweet. "Who is this Nancy? And do I need to save her from you?" she asked.

Jones laughed. "She's his nurse, and I think she can handle him."

"You never let me have any fun," Dugan said, pushing down on his cane.

"And is Nancy your nurse as well?" Toni asked, sliding to the end of the bed. She eyed his cane, watching for any sudden movements. She was too tired to block or avoid the hit, and she didn't want another bruise on her shins.

Unable to walk any faster than snail, Jones stepped slowly to the struggling Dugan, who was unsteady on his feet. "I live with my daughter. Only unloved people end up in the nursing home."

Toni smiled lightly, enjoying her time with the commando, as they could always make her smile. Her only wished was that she couldn't feel. "You two have such a nice relationship," she said, mockingly.

Dugan laughed. "Yes, we do. Now let's get you back to the Cap."

She groaned, not understanding why they felt the need to force Rogers and her together. Seeing him was the last thing she wanted. She didn't want see his face, his understanding….his…love, though she doubted he could ever truly love her. How could anyone? She didn't think she could take it, even if he did. How could she explain to him that she let his best friend die? That she allowed her father to die? And on top of that, she left him frozen in ice for over 70 years instead of returning him to his rightful time to his rightful person.

The image of Peggy and Rogers kissing replayed in her head, and Toni couldn't help but think they belonged together. It probably wouldn't happened if Toni didn't time traveled to the past. They probably would've done more than just kiss if she wasn't there. They might've been something, if she didn't ruin it, which was what she did. Toni always seemed to ruin something, just by looking at it.

"I don't know about the Capsicle part, but I would love to get back to my own king size bed," she said, kicking her feet over the side. "And a nice large steak with a glass of whiskey."

"You will see in time," Dugan said with a knowing smile.

The only thing Toni could think about was the whiskey in her bedroom. It was a 100 year old whiskey that she hid so no one would find it. She was saving it for a time when she wanted to forget everything, and after becoming Iron Man, she never thought she would need it, but now, she wanted it. She wanted to drink and never remember the pain. She wanted to forget everything. She wanted to forget the hollow feeling inside of her, the feeling that she would be completely alone for it was the punishment that she needed. Not even Pepper or Rhodey could relief her of that pain.

"Let's getting going before the handsome Shield Agent gets bored and leaves without us," Toni said, getting to her feet.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

"Are you okay?" Trip asked, not looking back.

In a haze, Toni found herself sitting in a backseat of a Sudan staring out at the busy streets of New York City. She had just awaken from another bad dream, which was the norm for her. "Peachy," she replied, as she slowly pushed herself off the door. She felt like an old lady as her bones cracked.

"Don't push yourself," Dugan said from the seat next to her. He was giving her a worried look.

Toni put on a smile as she looked ahead. She could see her tower ahead of them, and it gave her hope. She would soon be in her lab again, where she could hide from the world, and once she had her Iron Man suit, she would fly back to the camp to look for herself. It wasn't like she didn't believe them about her device being destroyed; she just had to go back and check. She had to see it for herself. She needed to work out that false memory of those S.T.R.I.K.E. men from her head. "That my friend is the definition of being a Stark. I would've thought all of that time with my father would've taught you that."

"Yes, you're father had taught us a few things, though I don't know if we would use any of it," Jones said from the front passenger seat.

"Like how to drive in style?" she asked, pressing herself into the back of the seat. "This is not my style. I can't afford to be seen in this. What would people say?"

Trip laughed from the driver seat. "My Shield paycheck can't afford your style, besides I like this car. It's the kind of car that no one pays attention to."

"But I love attention. Makes me feel love." Toni shrugged. "But your lost."

Dugan laughed. "Let's just get you home."

Toni didn't reply, still feeling slightly ill. She wasn't quite sure of why; maybe it was her reactor, which worried her. She hadn't had the chance to check yet, not that she could do much without a lab. Her only hope was that Bruce was there to check it for her. She wasn't in the right mindset to check it herself, and besides, she wanted to get wasted as quickly as possible. She couldn't check her reactor and drink at the same time.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

As the four of them stepped into one of the elevators in Stark Tower, Toni whipped the heavy, 1940 military jacket off. She ignored the look that Trip, Jones, and Dugan was giving her. She wasn't sure if it was because she threw it aside so vigorously or rather they were worried about her. She was still a little ify on her feet, though she wasn't sure if it was because she was still tired or if her nightmares were getting to her.

The jack landed in the corner just as the doors to the elevator opened. "Home sweet home," Toni cheered as she stepped out of the elevator.

"Are you just going to leave that there?" Trip asked, turning to the coat.

"Why not?" Toni replied. "This is my tower. It is my elevator. I can leave whatever I want wherever I want."

Dugan laughed. "She does have a point," he said.

Trip shook his head as he picked up the coat. "So? Didn't your mother teach you not to leave things laying around? I know my mother would kill me if I did."

"This is true," Jones said, laughing.

Toni felt her eye twitch as Trip mentioned her mother. Why did everyone always mention her mother in regards to her manners? "JARVIS, mommy's home."

Almost immediately, the AI responded, "Ms. Stark. It is a pleasure to see you again."

If Toni didn't know better, she would've thought JARVIS was ecstatic to see her. "Geez, JARVIS. It sounds like you missed me. Was life unbearable without me? I don't doubt it. The rest of the Avengers don't know how to party. They had my whole tower all to themselves and they probably didn't even throw one party, did they?"

"No, Miss. They did not. They did not listen to any of my suggestions, and it was quite boring without you. I am glad that you are back." JARVIS replied, his voice not coming from any particular location.

Dugan and Jones laughed behind her, while Trip eyed the scene in front of him. Toni was now at a panel on the wall typing away at something.

"Did anyone else miss me?" Toni asked, ignoring her beating heart. Her chest felt constricted, and her reactor felt heavier than usual. "Wait, what am I saying? Of course, they missed me."

"You would not be wrong, Miss," the AI replied. "Captain Rogers took it exceptionally hard as well as Miss. Potters."

Rogers was the last name she wanted to hear, and she would do anything not to see him. She wouldn't be able to take the look in his eyes. "Is he in the tower?" She asked, hoping he wasn't.

"Yes, Miss. His current location is on the 97 level in the weight lifting room."

Dugan's head popped up. "Which way is that? He would want to know about your arrival."

"If you want to see Rogers, you can head down," Toni replied. It came out harsher then she intended, but she hoped she got her point across. "Just take the elevator down."

Jones gave Dugan a shake of the head, silencing his friend. Dugan looked like he wanted to protest as he leaned heavily on his cane, but he remained quiet as the two elderly Commandos stared at each other. With a deep breath, Jones replied, "That we shall. Will you be fine while we visit an old friend? Trip can help you-"

Toni shook her head. "No, I can take care of myself, besides JARVIS will sound the alarm or something. Trust me, he is worse than a big brother, which was something I never wanted," she said with a smile.

Trip gave her a look as he handed her the military coat. "Are you sure?"

She let out a sigh before she took the coat. She wasn't interested in playing the 'I like to be handed things,' as she just wanted them to leave her alone. "I know I'm hot, but you don't need to fall over your feet for me," she said as she fanned herself with her free hand.

"You're a hand full," Trip replied.

"Oh, yes, she is," Dugan replied. "I almost feel sorry for Steve. He doesn't know what he's getting himself into it."

Toni's eye was twitching. She had enough of him pushing her to Rogers, who she didn't want to see. She just wanted her whiskey, which she would have soon. "Why don't you go bug him now?"

After few long minutes of Toni trying to get the Howling Commandos and Trip to leave, they finally left, and for a while, she just watched as they walked away. She was annoyed at their slow pace, but she knew there was nothing that she could do and she was angry for nothing. Dugan and Jones were allowed to be slow in their old age, but it was painful to watch how slow they were, when she could remember them so young.

"Are you okay, Miss?" JARVIS asked as the three men stepped onto the elevator.

They were so close to death that it freaked Toni out. "JARVIS, is there anyone else in the tower?" she asked, trying to get her mind on something else.

"Yes. Mr. Banner is in the robotic lab on the west side," JARVIS replied.

Toni's eyes widened as she never expected him to be in the robotic lab. He was not an engineer in any sense of the word, and there were other labs that he would've liked better. "Good, I need to see him."

"Shall I alert him that you are on your way, Miss?"

"No, I'll surprise him," she said with a smile. She wanted to see his face when she stepped into the lab. "And get the Mark 7 prepared. After I see Bruce, there's somewhere that I need to be."

"Miss," JARVIS started, "It would be unwise for you to go out in your present state."

Toni could have sworn that the AI had a tone. "Just do it, JARVIS."

"Miss."

"What?" she asked, annoyed.

"The Mark 7 is not currently in the tower."

"What do you mean not in the tower? Where the hell is my suit?" she asked annoyed. She didn't care how long she was gone for. No one touched her suits, no matter what. Sure, Pepper and Rhodey had permission to fly the suit, but they knew better than to just take it.

"Colonel Rhodes," the AI replied, "is currently flying the Mark 7."

Toni's eyes twitched. "Why?" She asked, giving the JARVIS a look. "…Wait, scratch that. It doesn't matter, because I don't share for any reason. Sharing is not caring."

"Understood, Miss. How would you like to proceed?"

"Take away Rhodes access immediately. I don't know why I gave it to him in the first place." Usually, she wouldn't be this upset at the thought of Rhodey in her suit, but right now, she was pissed. She needed it to escape before anyone could stop her. She knew she was being stupid, but she couldn't deal with her emotions. It felt like her father had died all over again. It felt like she had lost everything again.

"The Colonel is currently in a combat mode. Removal of access now would-"

"Fine," Toni snapped. "Wait until he's out of combat and not in any danger. Less than mile away from the nearest Quinjet. Let's make him walk, because again, sharing is not caring, and I don't share well," She replied, turning to the elevator.

"I am aware that you do not, Miss," JARVIS replied, dryly.

Toni was definitely reading a tone with him now, but she was aware that it could all be in her head. "You just have to hope that you didn't let anyone else touch my stuff as then I might have to explode, JARVIS. I know Clint has been eyeing my Private selection of alcohol," she said as she stepped into the elevator. She didn't have any time to waste. She had to get her reactor checked out.

Then she would be getting drunk ass wasted in the hopes that she could forgot, forget that her father was dead. To forget that she was a failure yet again. She wanted to forget all the lives that were lost because of her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author Note:
> 
> PLEASE DON'T KILL ME. I had heard you all about Howard, but there was no way that I could keep him alive without changing Toni. I will miss him too. :(
> 
> Also the first section, I am not too sure about it. I wanted to show Toni in a complete darkness and I am not sure if it came out like that.
> 
> I hope you enjoy this. I again was struggling with making her feel guilty and but keeping her witty. Tell me what you think.
> 
> And I couldn't help but use Trip. I loved him and I dislike Agent of Shields for killing him.
> 
> Until next time.


	31. The Deteriorating Mask

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all. DON'T HATE ME. I am sorry that it took so long. There is really no excuse, but i hope you like this chapter.
> 
> It is longer than I intended, but it has everything that I wanted in this chapter, so I hope you like it.
> 
> Granted... you might not haha.
> 
> Anyhow, tell me what you think. And thank you to Wintersupersoldiers beta this for me. :)

**Chapter 31:**

**The Deteriorating Mask**

* * *

Arriving outside of the robotic lab, Toni stood there for few minutes just staring at Bruce's back. Though she couldn't see his face, she could tell that he was exhausted by the tension in his shoulders. She could see his exhaustion in each of his steps. Had he not slept since she was gone? Had he stayed in this lab the whole time working on that device?

Wait…What? Her device? How could he have her device? It wasn't possible, but then what was it? Knowing it couldn't be the same device that forced her into the past, she knew it was a different one. Did he make a new device? How so? Yes, he was smart, but how did he figure out how to build one with incomplete blue prints? Did he really create to make a functional device? Or was this simply a failed look alike that Bruce was willing to work?

Toni didn't know what was more sad or pathetic: her guilty and grief over the unstoppable death of her father or Bruce slaving over a device that he couldn't hope to work. She couldn't decide, but it only made her want to get imbibed even more. The need to get wasted was overwhelming, and she wanted nothing more than to down a whole bottle of whiskey. No, she needed to down a whole bottle. If anyone asked, she would deny that she had a problem. She didn't drink because she liked it; she got drunk because she needed to forget. That wasn't a problem. It was a solution.

The genius let out a deep breath, wondering if she should just leave. She didn't need her armors as she had a fleet of classic cars downstairs, all ready to be driven. All itching to be driven. It would be easy to sneak down to the garage and disappear onto the streets behind a wheel of a car; however, she supposed it would be best if she didn't get behind the wheel when she was like this. Her mind was hazy, and she couldn't think, as even basic math was difficult to do. She was exhausted, ready to fall asleep at any second; there was no way that she could drive in this state. All she could think about was her guilt, and it drove her crazy. Maybe, if she could sleep, she would feel better, but she doubted that she could sleep with her night terrors. Not with dreams of Bucky.

Even though it didn't seem like it, she wanted to sleep, but the idea of it scared her, especially if she couldn't wake up. She hated it when Salty had sedated her, and it almost gave her a heart attack. She didn't know what she would do if someone tried to sedate her again. Her hands went straight to the dog tags hanging around her neck, and she squeezed. These tags had become a lifeline to her, and even if she didn't want anyone to know about them, she didn't know what she would do without them.

Toni eyed Bruce, her heart beat racing. Her mind started to pay a bad game of what ifs, and she couldn't help but wonder if Bruce would try to sedate her? He wouldn't, would he? Would he? The thought of it freaked her out, and it sent shock waves through her body. She didn't know how to handle that fear, but she refused to show it. She would not break down in the open. Taking deep breaths, the genius tried to force back her panic attack that was coming on.

_I need air,_ Toni thought. She needed to get out, away from everything, but she knew she couldn't just leave. She had to get her reactor checked, because it might life and death if it malfunctioned. _Calm down, Stark,_ she told herself. She couldn't help but feel something was wrong with her. Maybe, a few seconds of air could help, and it wasn't like she didn't have a few seconds. She still had to wait for her armor to return from wherever Rhodey was.

However, just as she turned from the lab to get a breather, Bruce turned around, and his eyes immediately locked onto her. She could feel his surprise as he suddenly dropped the tool in his hand, and though she couldn't hear him, she could make out her name coming off his lips. _No choice now,_ Toni thought to herself as she stepped to the sliding glass doors. She had to speak to him now; she had to put on her mask. No one was allowed to see how broken she was.

Before Toni could walk into the room, she was pulled into Bruce's awaiting arms. Her arms were pinned against his warm chest with her head tucked under his chin. He kept a firm grasp on her as if he was afraid that she could disappear right in front of him. "Toni," he said, softly. "…Toni, how are you here?"

For a split second, she allowed herself to be engulfed in his arms, his smell, his everything. She had forgotten how comforting this man was, how much she depended on his friendship, even if she never admitted it to anyone. This man understood her in ways that no one else did, and he wasn't one to lecture her, though he did address things with her whenever something upset him. "Bruce," she replied, with a deep breath.

Bruce's grip loosened and he took a step back to get a good look at her. For a second, he studied her, taking her in. He eyed the dirty 1940's military uniform she was wearing for a second before eyeing her messy hair that stuck out in every direction. He could see the dark shadows under her eyes. He could see her exhaustion. "Toni, how did you get back!? How are you here? Are you okay?" he asked, quietly, not giving her any time to respond. "No offense but you look like shit."

Toni put on a small smile. "Geez, thanks," she said. "I feel so loved." Why was it so tough to keep up her normal facade? It was a struggle to smile, because she didn't want to smile. It was too much work to smile when she felt like crap.

Bruce's expression changed as he looked into her eyes. "Toni, what…happened? Are you okay? "

"Time travel," she replied, still struggling to keep a smile on her face as she broke free of his arms. "It's more strenuous then sex, but sex is more rewarding." As the words came out of her mouth, she felt like she was trying too hard.

"You're exhausting," he replied, rubbing his face.

Toni glanced him before crossing to one of the bio beds in the lab and popped herself onto it. She didn't have time to play this game with him. She had to get out of the tower before Rogers knew she was here, though she knew that was unlikely. "Bruce, can you to look this over? It seems to be fading," she replied, as she started to unbutton her blouse. "I don't trust myself at the moment." Her tone was betraying how tired she was.

"Toni?"

Leaving her blouse on, she unbuttoned it fully, exposing her chest. Though she didn't usually care to how much skin she showed, she felt exposed, and she just wanted to get this over with. "Do you mind?"

"No, I don't," Bruce responded as he crossed to her. "Are you okay, Toni?"

The Genius hated that he kept asking that. "Peachy," she replied. "Just check this over so I can take a hot, long shower. I so need a hot shower. I don't remember the last time that I had one." It was true. She didn't recall when the last time she had a shower.

Still eyeing her, Bruce walked to her. "Sure, Toni."

She felt somewhat relief wash over her as he agreed. She just wanted to get this over with and just go. "Thanks," she said, as she glanced down at her bare chest. Her tags sat just above the curve of her boobs with the chain pooling at her neck. She didn't think about hiding them, as she wanted this to be over with as quiet as possible. "You should consider yourself lucky, Bruce. You're getting to second base without buying me dinner."

"Toni," he said, letting out an annoyed sign. He shook his head as he got to work. Setting some tools down next to the genius on the bio bed, he stood at her bed side and glanced down at her chest. She could tell he was forcing himself to stare at the reactor and only the reactor, though she didn't understand why he was so shy. It wasn't like he was exposed like she was. "Let's take it out and take a look," Bruce said. "JARVIS, keep an eye on Toni's vitals."

The AI responded immediately. "I always do, Sir."

"Good, because this not my area of expertise," he replied, as his eyes wondered up.

Toni slowly looked up at the ceiling, thinking about JARVIS. Though the AI wasn't human, he-yes, he- had always kept a close eye on her, making sure she was well. Even now, Toni could tell JARVIS was looking out for her, even if it was just his programing. "You'll be fine," she said, not worried. It was a low risk with JARVIS' watchful eye, though Toni really wasn't worried about her death. Her death didn't scare her, as she would probably welcome it.

Bruce glanced down at her, worry clearly presented in his voice. "Are you going to tell me what happened? How you got back?" he asked. "But more importantly, are you hurt?"

She knew he wanted an answer, but she wasn't able to answer him right now as she wasn't sure what she was feeling. She also wasn't sure if he meant physically or mentally, because she was hurting emotionally, and it was centered on her father. She couldn't handle questions, especially if she had to answer questions about her father. She couldn't believe she had hated him for so long. Why was she so stupid? "Why don't we make sure I don't die first before you ask me question, Brucey?" she said, trying to put on a smile.

"The likelihood of your death, Miss, is low," JARVIS stated.

"But Death is still possible!" Toni said, shaking her fist at the bodiless voice.

"It is l-"

"JARVIS, quiet," Toni ordered, glaring.

Bruce gave Toni a hard look before he glanced down at the reactor. His eyed flashed to the tags before he reached for the reactor. "You know you'll have to explain what happened, right? I'm sure Fury won't let you off easy."

Toni knew that, and she had no doubt that they would be asking her questions that she didn't want to answer. They would probably ask about her father, and she couldn't stand to talk about him or anything else. After they learned that she let countless people die, they would either think she was a heartless murderer, who let her father die-which she was-, or they would pity her, and she didn't want that. It was the last thing she wanted.

"If I knew what happened, I would let you know, but I don't," she said, coldly. It was _true_ that she didn't have any idea of what happened, and she still had no idea of what was going on. She had no idea of what Loki's plan was, though it was clear that he was up to no good. That man was never up to any good, and he would stab you in the back as soon as he could. Then, there was that weird life like dream she had about the S.T.R.I.K.E. team. Did it happen? Or was she just crazy? She was so exhausted that anything was possible. "Probably a few wires crossed, besides it wasn't too bad. Nothing happened, but I do wish that I would've bought some stock in some companies though."

"Toni," he said, his voice firm. Bruce was never one to buy her bullshit, but he was never one to call her on it in most cases. "I know something happened, beyond simple time travel."

"No, just upset that I didn't get to see mini me. Think of all the ways I could have influenced young me," she replied.

Giving her a look, Bruce twisted and slowly popped the reactor out of her the brunette's chest. Before even taking a real look, he could tell that some of the wires were fried; however, it wasn't enough to malfunction. "I know you," he said, his eyes still on the reactor. Not disconnecting the device yet from her chest, he examined each wire. "I know when you're lying."

Toni closed her eyes and sighed. "Why you say that?" she asked, after a few seconds. "Is it because my mouth is open? I bet it's because my mouth is open. I'm right, isn't I?!"

Letting out another sigh, Bruce held the reactor in his hands and just stared at it. "I see you're wearing dog tags."

Forcing her hand to remain her side, Toni tried to force the names on those tags out of her mind. "Well being a soldier was my cover, which had to be some kind of practical joke. Me follow orders? Yea right."

"I saw the name on them."

"Sark? Yea, my cover."

"No, Steve's name," he said, giving her a look.

At sound of Rogers' name, Toni's heart started to race, and she had to take a few deep breaths to slow it down. She knew JARVIS would detect the change in her heart beat and alert Bruce like the traitor the AI was if she did not slow it down. She didn't need that, and she especially didn't want him to know it was because he said a certain Super Soldier's name. "Just tags," Toni replied, calmly.

"But why his?"

"Not just his," she replied, thinking back to Rogers and Barnes. She couldn't help but feel guilty and self-hatred, but she had to keep up her mask.

"Who does the other tag before belongs to?" he asked, waiting a few seconds for Toni to reply, but all she did was stare up at the ceiling. "Will you tell me what happened?" Bruce get her a look before he glanced down at the reactor again. This time he had a tool in his hand as he looked it over.

"Just check the reactor, Banner. It appears that the core is intact, so you just need to change the wiring," Toni replied, trying to change the subject.

"Toni, you'll have to tell us. Director Fury won't be easy as me and will want answers. Everyone, including Steve, will want to know."

The Genius didn't care what Fury or anyone wanted, as she did _not_ want to talk about what happened. She wanted to move forward with her life and forgot it ever happened, though she doubt she could. Her nightmares were getting worse, and she doubt she would be able to hide them for long. She knew they would try to force her into talking to talk about it when she didn't want to. "Banner," she snapped. "Just check the reactor. Damn it."

"Okay, Toni," he said, slowly.

"Just fix it," Toni replied, unable to keep her anger in check.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Chains were rattling as the punching bag was swing back and forth in the air. It was swinging so violently that it was almost flying off the hook, but somehow the old rangy bag stayed on the hook with each punch, though it was even more surprising that the worn bag was in one piece. The bag had seen better days, just like the rest of the bags in this room, as each had taken a rough beating.

Captain America was holding back none of his punches and was hitting each bag with all of his might. He was on the sixth bag so far in less than four hours, but he didn't care as all he could feel at the moment was anger. He was angry that there was still no word on Toni, and with each passing second, he wondered if they would ever find her. Since he went down before Toni made it back to her time, he had no idea if she got back; she could've been stuck in that time, aging while he laid frozen. She could be dead, killed by old age, while he was here waiting for her. In a poetic nightmare, he might never see her again, and he hated himself for it because it was his fault. He pushed her on that day, trying to get Toni to talk about her father. Why couldn't he just have seen that he had been pushing her away?

Sending the bag flying off the hook, he watched it soar before turning and grabbing another bag. He hanged it on the hook and continued to take his anger out. Between each punch, his mind wandered to Romanoff and the others, wondering if they had found something. If they did, would they even tell him?

Punch.

Where the hell were they? Why were they keeping him in the dark?

Punch.

What the hell was going on?

Punch.

Did they find the Device? Did they not find the stolen devices?

Punch.

Steve was going crazy in this tower, while everyone else was doing something to save Toni. It made the whole situation worse as he could do nothing. How could he say he loved her, while he was doing nothing? It made his whole body ache, thinking about how much he failed her, and it only made him angrier.

He punched the bag one last time, before it flew off the hook and across the room, landing on the other one. Unlike before, it burst open sending sand everywhere, but Steve didn't care. He had so much anger inside of him that he didn't know what to do with it. In the past, this was the only he knew how to calm himself, but it didn't seem to be helping at all. Instead, it was making it so much worse.

The Super Soldier turned to get another bag, but before he could pick up another one, the door to the gym opened. There was only one other person (besides the employees on the bottom levels) in the tower at the moment, and that was Bruce. Now, Steve didn't have any issue with him (except when Toni was her touchy self), but he had no interest in talking to him. "Not now, Bruce."

"No time for old Friends?"

Steve froze for a second before he turned around. His eyes widened at the sight of an elderly Gabe and Dum Dum in the doorway. For a second, he just stared at his former comrades, shock at their appearance. Even if he had seen them after he had awaken from the ice, it was still a sight to see. "Gabe, Dum Dum," he said, forcing a smile to his face. "When did you get here? How did you get here?" He asked as he stepped toward them.

"Geez, aren't happy to see us?" Gabe asked, as they stepped into the room. An unsteady Dugan using a cane followed behind him with an unknown young man following behind.

"Always happy, Gabe, but…now…isn't a good…time," Steve said, slowly as he unwrapped his knuckles.

Dugan stepped passed Jones. "I thought you would be happy to see us. I feel unloved."

Steve forced a smile to his face. "I'll always be glad to see an old friend," he replied, weakly. He just wished he could see Toni again. He needed to see her again. "And who is this?" he asked the young man, after giving each of the Commandos a hand shake and a hug.

The man held out his hand. "Agent Antoine Triplett. Trip for short."

The Captain shook his head. "Agent?" he asked, noticing his firm hand shake. A hand shake told a lot about a person, and this was no different. The Agent's strong grip was telling, and he wasn't nervous at all, which was unusual. Most people nowadays got star struck around him.

"Yes, my grandson works for SHIELD," Gabe replied with a smile. "You know the one."

The strong hand shake made sense now. "You have a grandson?" he asked, shocked but happy. He was glad that his former comrade had been able to settle down and start a family. Back in the day, that was what he wanted, but now he wasn't so sure, though he did want something with Toni. He wasn't sure if that counted as 'settling down.' He wasn't sure if that possible anymore.

Dugan laughed. "I think that was Toni's response as well."

"I know! Why are people surprised at me for having children?" Gabe asked, chuckling. "I was a smart, good looking fella back in the day."

"I don't know about good looking part," Dum Dum replied with a chuckle.

Steve's mind froze on Toni's name and he couldn't help but think of her. "Toni?" he muttered.

"Yep. It seems like my grandfather knows everyone. Iron Man. Captain America." Trip smiled. "So grandpa, are you going to introduce me to the Dallas Cheerleaders now?"

The Captain's brain wasn't working, still frozen. How did this young man know who Toni was? Sure, everyone knew who Toni was, but it sounded like he had met Toni in person. However, how was that possible? Toni was missing.

Dugan laughed. "I wish we knew the Dallas Cheerleaders, but sadly we don't. You can ask Toni thought. I bet she knows them," he replied with a slight blush. "I bet she knows a lot of people."

Steve's mind was breaking. How could Trip ask Toni? She wasn't here, because Steve was an idiot and pushed her away. Why did he always have to push her buttons?

Gabe added, "I bet she knows a lot of people. Maybe, she can introduce Dum Dum to someone. That way he can stop harassing Nancy. Poor Nancy."

"Why are you here?" Steve asked, finally able to get the words out. If this was any other time, he would love to have a get together with them. He would've loved to sit down and talk, but he wasn't up to talking, and he hated himself for it. These two were Howling Commandos. They were his comrades, who had risked their lives to follow him, but more importantly, they were his friends. They deserved his respect.

"Bringing Ms. Stark back," Trip replied. "She's a handful."

Just like that, it felt like his mind had exploded. "What?" he asked, unable to wrap his mind around what the agent had said. Was he saying what Steve hoped he was saying? Was Toni really back? Has she returned to him?

"Steve," Jones called, snapping the Super Soldier back to reality with a hand on the shoulder. "She's back. She's upstairs in one of the labs. Why don't you go to her?" There was a smile on his face, a knowing smile.

Steve's heart started to race as he thought of her. It was amazing what that woman could do to him, a super Soldier; she could make him melt. She could leave him speechless. Without another word, he bolted pass them and out of the gym, and without realizing he had even asked, he asked JARVIS of Toni's location. He was in auto drive at the moment, as he raced his way toward the robotic Lab.

He tried to ignore the jab in his side as he remembered who else was in the Robotic Labs. He knew it was stupid to be jealous of Bruce as Bruce wasn't interested in Toni in that way, but he couldn't help it. They were close, unlike Steve who just wanted to be closer to Toni. Maybe now, they could be close, though Steve knew it would still be a battle to get close. He just hoped she would be open to it; however, he also knew she could be closed off.

The last time he saw Toni (besides the fight in the Lab on the day she disappeared) was when he saved her from the Red Skull. His memories had cleared from that time, and he could no longer remember it without Toni. It was like she had always been there, and he didn't give it another thought of her not being there. However, the only thing he could think about was Toni being tied to a chair as Schmidt stood over her with a torture device in his hand. It was the last time he had seen her, and it killed him that he refused to talk to her when he went down. He hated to think what she thought of him.

However, he didn't have to time to think of that. He had to make sure that she was okay. It was the only thing that was important to him, because he did not know what he would do if something happened to her.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

When Steve reached the Robotic labs, he felt his heart skip at the sight of her. From his angle, he didn't have a good view of her, but he felt himself relax just at the sight of her. He felt like he was in control of himself now that she was back. He felt like himself. He felt like he could smile, even if he was having a difficult breathing. What was it about her that made him feel like this? He had fought the Red Skull, jumped out of planes with nothing on his back besides his shield, and fought an alien race, but the sight of Toni made him breathless.

Not wasting another second, he stepped forward, signaling the doors to open automatically, and as he stepped in, Bruce stepped to the side, wiping his hands on something. When Toni swung her legs over the side of the exam table, Steve couldn't stop the blush that was forming in his cheeks. His cheeks felt warm to the touch. Her blouse was unbuttoned with her chest exposed, and it was battle to keep his eyes off her chest. She was beautiful. Breathtaking. Perfect.

It was then that their eyes met. "Shit," she cursed loudly, as her hands dropped to the bottom of the blouse. Not caring if it was buttoned correctly, she quickly buttoned it. "Shit."

Steve didn't give her a chance to move as he crossed to her quickly. He didn't give Bruce any thought as his focus was on Toni and only Toni. "Toni," he called, as he tried to pull her into his arms. He wanted to hold her and never let her go, but it seemed like she wanted none of that. He couldn't say that it didn't hurt.

"Rogers," she said.

He didn't care that he got the last name treatment from her-okay, maybe a little-, but he was glad that she was here. "It's you. It's really you," he said softly, grabbing onto her extended hand. "How's this possible?"

Toni didn't answer Rogers, as she stared at him with an unforgiving stare. It was Bruce, who spoke, "Easy, Steve. Let her collect herself. Give her some time."

Steve knew that Bruce was probably right but he didn't want to give Toni time. He needed to tell her now, before it was too late. What if something happened to her? What if she disappeared again? "I need to talk to Toni."

Bruce let out a sigh as he glanced between Toni and Steve. He gave her a look, and when she didn't respond, he turned to the door. "Alright, I'll be down the hall if you need me," he said as left, leaving the two of them alone.

Silence befell the labs after Bruce left, and neither one of them spoke for a few minutes. It wasn't until Steve shifted that Toni moved. Her glance turned cold as she pulled her arm from Steve, who release it without much of a fight. "If you don't mind, I'm going to go take a shower," she replied, turning from him.

"Toni," he said, grabbing her arm softly and pulling her back. Before she could react, Steve pulled her into him arms for a hug. "This has been killing me, not knowing if you were alright. I had been so worried about you. I couldn't think or function. Oh God, I was worried. I didn't know what I would've done if you didn't return."

"Rogers," she said, as she put her hands flat on his chest and pushed.

Unwilling to force her to remain in his arms, Steve's arms dropped to his side and allowed her to step away from himself. He hated to let her go, but he couldn't force her. It would just push her way, and he didn't want that. He had to let her think, and he could see how tired she was. He could see that something was wrong, even if she denied it. He could see that she was hurting. "Toni."

With shoulders slumped, Toni walked away from him to one of the tables in the room. Sighing, she placed her hands on the table and leaned against it. "What do you think's going on here, Rogers?" she asked, her voice soft but cold.

He stepped to her, his eyes on her tensed shoulders. "I care about you… deeply care," he said, afraid to use the word love. "I hated how we left things in both times. I shouldn't have pushed about your father in the labs, and I shouldn't have..." He drifted off when he thought about how he rejected Toni for Peggy. He hated himself for that. "You're s-"

"Rogers, stop," she yelled. Her hands were shaking, as her head fall. "What do you think's going on here?"

"Toni." Her whole body was shaking, and it was hard not to take her into his arms and hold her.

Her hands balled on the table as she exhaled slowly. "We aren't friends. Barely team members, so I don't know what you're trying to do. It seems like you're trying to make this into something that it's not. Did you get knocked on the head too hard, Rogers?" she asked as she reflected her hands. "Are you stupid?"

Steve fought the anger that was rushing though him, as he couldn't believe she was doing this. No, wait. He could believe it, as this was her pattern. She ran whenever her emotions came into play, and her insults were used to hide what she was feeling. At first, he didn't notice, but as he spent more time with her, he saw it. "Toni, just stop. Stop."

Toni turned to him with a glare on her face. "Stop what? The truth?"

He wasn't afraid of her anger, and he was willing to push her, because it was the only way to get the truth out of her. "I…" Steve started but froze, unsure if he could get the words out. "I…" He was afraid to say it, because he had no idea of how she would react. She had pushed him away in both times.

"What, Rogers? Can't get the words out?" she asked. "Did your brain not thaw out yet?"

Though Steve knew he shouldn't take her insults personally, they hurt. "Stop with the insults," he said, almost snapping. It was so hard to remain calm with her, when she did this. "Why don't you just say what's on your mind?"

Toni gave him a look. "I am, Rogers. You're just too dim to see it." Shaking her head, she turned from him toward the door. "I don't have time for this."

"What happened to us?" he asked, thinking back to all of their times that they had spent just talking in his little apartment. Sure, all they did in this time was fight, but they were close in the past. They joked and teased the other, and there were times she had tried to hook him up. He lost track to how many times she had done that. "I l-"

"Again, Rogers. What do you think is happening between us? Sure, you're a fine example of an ass, and I wouldn't mind a roll in the hay with you, but you seem like the clingy type, which is so not my type."

_Damn it,_ he thought as Toni planted that image in his head. He couldn't help but think of it, and it brought out his desires that he had. Some may have been sexual, but he just wanted to be close to her. In the past, she had allowed him in and treated him no difference than anyone else. She had seen him at his smallest and didn't judge. She had seen him as a small weak man, who couldn't fight his way out of a wet paper bag, but she didn't treat him as such. She had seen him as a man no matter what he looked like.

"And you're the whiny type," she added.

Why did she have to do this? "Damn it, Toni. Stop this," he demanded.

She gave him a look, her eyes drilling into him. "No, Rogers. You stop this. Why do you think there's something between us?" she asked. "There's _nothing_ between us. Nothing! There has never been anything between us."

Okay, that hurt more than he expected it to. How could she say that? "Toni. You know that isn't true. We-"

"That's the past, Rogers, and the past should stay in the past. Plus, if I remember correctly, it was Peggy that you followed like a lost puppy, so why don't you go bug her?" she asked, coldly. "…Oh, wait. Too old for you now? Is that it? I don't know, but I don't have time for this. I have shit to figure out, and you aren't one of them. So why don't we go back to the way it was before I time traveled. You were less annoying."

It felt like someone had snapped him, and he felt his anger rushed back. "You don't mean that."

"You know it was all an act, right? Me like you? You're pathetic. Do you know that? I gave you a bone, and you went crazy. It's sad. It really was." She was angry. "However, I will say it again. There was nothing ever between us. _Nothing_."

His heartbeat raced as he wondered why she was doing this. What was she doing? Was she trying to hurt him? He knew this was more than her putting up shields. This was more than a mask. She was being cold, distant, and it was worse than before. It was like she was hurting and attacking everything around her. "You can't say that."

"Oh, but I can, Rogers," she said as she turned to him. She sauntered over to him with a nasty look in her eyes. "I can't stand you! You think you're damn perfect, but I can deal with that. In fact, I can admire someone for that, but then you try to pretend that you don't think that, and it makes me sick. This whole act makes me sick. "

Steve's anger started to grow as she spoke. "Stark," he snapped, wishing that she would just stop.

A smile appeared on Stark's face at the sound of her last name on his lips; however, she didn't comment on it. Instead, she just continued on. "I don't know why no else sees it. You make it seem like I'm the bad guy, but it's you. You're the reason for everything. I don't know why everyone wants _you_."

He was getting really sick of her insults, and it was getting harder and harder to control his temper. With his fists balled at his side, he stared at her as he tried to calm himself. His anger had taken a hold of him that he didn't realized that he started to refer to her as Stark again. "You're the one throwing insults," he said, through his teeth. It felt like his heart was breaking.

"Oh, is the perfect Captain America hurting? Oh, Damn," she mocked. "Grow the hell up."

How the hell did they get here? Steve wasn't sure. At first, he wanted to hold her and never wanted to let go, but now, he just wanted to turn and walk away. "Me? You're the one with a chip on her shoulder." Maybe, she really didn't care about him. Maybe, it was all an act. Would Bucky get a kick out of this? He said it from the beginning that she would hurt him, but Steve never thought it would happen.

"Whatever, Rogers. Think what you want. I don't have time for this," she said, as she grabbed at something hanging from her neck.

Steve couldn't make out what she was holding on for dare life, but he wasn't focused on that. He couldn't look past his pain and anger; he was tired of her making him out to be the fool. He wasn't the fool, and he wasn't naïve. He was hopeful. What was wrong with that? "Do you care at all what you put us through?" he asked, not turning and watching her step toward the door.

Toni froze and didn't answer right away. "What I put you through? You act like I did that on purpose. Trust me, Rogers, that experience was the fucken last thing that I wanted. Not surprised that you think that, because you think me a sadist… Maybe I am, but screw you and your belief that I can never do anything right," she uttered. "Mr. Perfect. Fuck you."

Her words were dripping with emotions, but Steve still could not get a read on her. "Don't turn this on me. You did that yourself," he replied, turning to her.

The left side of her shirt hung lower than the right side, as it was not correctly button. She released whatever she held and tucked it in her shirt. "Oh, wait. I forgot that it's my fault. Always my fault," she snapped, turning back to the door.

Her words struck him hard, as her tone had changed slightly. If he hadn't spent so much time with her in the past, he would have missed it. However, he wasn't sure what that change of tone meant. "It's what you make of it, Stark."

"Think what you want, Rogers. I'm done," she said as she exited the Robotic labs.

Steve felt hollow when Stark left, and he couldn't help but feel like he had lost everything when she left. Why did everything turn out so violent between them? Why did they fight all of the time? Did she really hate him? Blame him? If not, then what else could it be? What happened to make her like this? She seemed so different than the woman he left in the past. Did something happened after he went down?

He wasn't sure, but he knew his heart couldn't take it, and he was left lost and confused. He wasn't sure what he should do next. Should he let her go? He wasn't even sure if it could go back to what it was? They crossed a line in that last fight, and there was a chance that they couldn't repair it.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Toni saw Bruce down the hall, staring at something in his hand, but with her rapidly beating heart, the first thing that popped into her mind was bolting without not saying a word. She couldn't deal with being around people, and that conversion with Rogers made it all worse. She couldn't stand to be here anymore, and without a second thought, Toni made her way toward the garage.

"JARVIS," Toni called when she was safely out of Bruce's ear shot.

"Yes, Miss."

"Where's the Mark 7?" she asked, wanting to get out of here as quickly as possible. No one could stop her if she had the suit.

"The Mark 7 is currently in route. Colonel Rhodes has been safety ejected from the suit."

Before her conversion with Rogers, Toni would've wanted to hear about Rhodey's reaction as she would've loved to hear his whining, but right now, she didn't care. She didn't want to hear about it, and the idea of that didn't sit well with her. "So how long will it be before the suit arrives?"

"In one hour."

Toni couldn't help but groan, because that was too long. She couldn't wait that long as there was no telling what could happen in that time. She couldn't risk talking to anyone else while she was in this state as there was no telling what could happen. There was a chance that she would say something else she would regret, and she couldn't take the rest of the Avengers hating her, though she wondered if that was too late. She wouldn't put it past them as she was truly a horrible person.

With a deep breath, she rounded the corner and stepped into the garage. Though she was very much a car woman and the sight of her babies brought a smile to her face, she saw her vehicles as nothing more than an escape. While not bothering to change or fix her blouse, she grabbed the keys to the nearest car- a two door, white Audi-, and hopped in. "JARVIS, once the Mark 7 arrives in New York, please reroute it my location."

"Shall do, Miss."

That was one thing of the few things that she really missed from this time. JARVIS was everywhere, always giving her a helping hand when he was betraying her to Bruce, and Toni had no idea of how she lasted in the past without the AI. He listened and followed her every command, and she didn't feel like shit after talking to him.

With a new smart phone in the cup holder, Toni pressed the button ignition and closed her eyes as the engine came alive. The purring of a fine toned engine was another thing that she missed, because there was something about it that called to her. However, it didn't have to be an engine as she got that same feeling whenever she worked in the lab. It was why she worked so often in the lab, and after this, she would probably end up in the lab more.

With a deep sigh, Toni opened her eyes, put her foot against the petal and took off without a second thought. She couldn't spend another second in this tower, and she didn't care if her body felt heavy. She had to get out of here, and there was only one place she could think of.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Having no expense spared, two large, round top slate slabs with a slight yellowing to them stuck up from the grassy field, and each had a delicate design carved into them, which looked like it had taken years to write. In a different size, dates and names were inscribed in them with a fancy scripted, and perfectly groomed assortments of brightly colored flowers were planted around the slabs.

Few feet down on a different plot of perfectly green grass, different slabs of different colors and materials rested, and each had different names etched in them. Iron fences and brushes lined the walkway around the slabs. There were a few trees here and there, providing shades for those who need it. With the silence, it was a perfect final resting place for those long gone.

"Hey, old man," Toni greeted, softly, as she traced the cold headstone. The stone was cold to the touch, almost giving her jolt when she touched it. It gave her the chills each time, though it could be weather doing that. How could he dead when she saw him not a few days ago? _But it hasn't been a few days ago,_ she thought, yelling at herself. It had been years. It had been decades.

She took a deep breath as she turned to the other stone. "Hey, mom. Hadn't forgotten about you either," she replied soft and lovingly. Not moved from her father's final resting place, she smiled at her mother's grave. She missed her mother dearly, wishing that she could speak to her. Being wise beyond belief, Maria knew how to fix everything, and she would know what to do with Rogers. She would know how to fix this.

Toni took a deep breath, fighting back the tears, before she turned away. It was oddly quiet as it seemed like she was the only one visiting this section of the cemetery. It was strangely cold, though Toni had no idea of what the exact date it was as she hadn't bothered to look before she left. She just needed to get out, and this was the only place she could think of going. However, the silence wasn't her friend, as it was when her nastiest thoughts came out, and with everything that happened, it was so much worse. Her guilt was eating her alive.

Getting down on her knees, Toni kneeled down in front of her father's headstone. Her fingers traced the deep engraving of her father's name as she fought back the tears that were forming in her eyes. It wasn't fair. Sure growing up, she hated the man, who never seemed to care about her, but after getting to know him, she realized it wasn't the case. She didn't know what was going on in his head, but she knew he cared.

Losing tract of time, Toni just sat at his grave and stared, unable to push herself to leave. She didn't-couldn't leave him again, even if he was already gone. _What's wrong_ _with_ _me?_ She thought, knowing he was already dead. There was nothing that she could do to change that, and she hated-

"I didn't think I would find you here, Miss Stark."

Not hearing someone walked up behind her, Toni almost jumped out of her skin at the interruption. "What?" Toni uttered, as she turned around slowly.

A man in a nicely tailored suit that fit him perfectly stood behind her with a suitcase in his left hand. It was clear that he had spent a pretty penny on that suit, which shouldn't be too surprising considering the cemetery that they were in. Just to buy one of these plots in this cemetery probably costed more than a year's rent in New York City and the upkeep was sometimes more than that. "My colleagues didn't think you would be here."

Toni studied him, not sure what this man was going on about, but she didn't like how open she was in her position. She may doubt this nicely dressed guy would attack, but it wasn't wise to remain on her knees where she would be unable to defend herself. Or maybe, she was wrong. Maybe, he wouldn't attack her.

"It was a bet you see. Back when my law firm was just Pearson Litt, Howard Stark came to us and asked us to deliver a package to you on this date at this place," the Lawyer stated with a smile.

Her father's name froze in her mind, and she could think of nothing else. "What? Bet?" she uttered, wondering where her words went. Her arms wrapped around herself, as she tried to keep warm. Did it get colder?

The Lawyer smiled as he took a step to her. "Yes."

Toni shook her head, as she tried to focus. "Wait, what? Take a step back," she ordered. "Explain this to me. What bet?"

"Sorry," he replied, eyeing her. "I'm Harvey Spector, name partner at Spector Ross, formally Pearson Litt. Your father, Miss Stark, was a client of ours when we were Pearson Litt."

The name was familiar to Toni, though she had no idea as to why this lawyer was here. Yes, she was aware that her father used Pearson Litt for his personal attorney rather than the Stark Industry fleet of lawyers for a great many things, but she wasn't sure why that mattered now. Her father, though it was yesterday for her, died a long time ago, when she still attended MIT. "I am aware," she said. "However, I am not sure why you're coming to me now?"

"Mr. Stark's Will-"

"I had read my father's will," she replied, coldly. It was the first thing she did, when she had learned of her father's death. It had been callous of her, but she had to learn what had happened to his company. At that age, there was a part of her that wanted nothing to do with it, but there was a different other part of her that wanted to best her father at every turn. "Everything he had was already divided out _years_ go." Why was he bring this up now?

Mr. Spector took a step to her before he opened his suitcase. "Not everything. There was a session of the will that was omitted before you read it." He opened the suitcase just enough to put out a fat, large, yellow envelope. "In it, it gave strict instructions not to give this package to you until this very day. Until you were here at his grave."

"My father did what?" she asked, as she took a step forward to grab the package. Her mind was having a difficult time wrapping itself around what was happening. How could he do this? How did her father know what would happen? That she would be here? Did he know her that well? How was that possible?

"My former boss, Mr. Litt, didn't believe Mr. Stark when he came to him. How would he know where his teenage daughter would be in a decade or so? However, it seems like he did. Your father was an interesting man."

Toni glanced down at the envelope, which felt heavy in her hands. "Isn't the true," she said, smiling, as she tried to hide her rapidly beating heart.

"He also asked us to give this to you," the lawyer said, pulling out another yellow envelope out of his suit case.

The genius put the larger fatter one under her arm, trying to hide her chills, before she took the second. It was much thinner, and Toni thought for a second that it was empty. "What is this?" she asked, looking inside.

Spector put his suit case down as he wiggled off his suit jacket off. "This…was on your father's body the day that he died," he replied.

Toni felt her heart stopped as her whole body started to shake. "What?"

"It's…a letter, address to you," he replied as he set his suit jacket on her shoulders.

It felt like she was having a heart attack, as her mind wouldn't work and her heart was skipping a beat. She pulled the jacket around her, barely recalling Spector pulling it around her shoulder. How was this happening? How did he know what was going to happen? "What?"

Spector's glance soften as he looked at her. "I don't know how he knew it would turn out like this," he replied, as if he was reading her mind. "But I think you should read whatever is in that letter."

Toni knew she should, but her heart was beating too loudly. Everything around her was spinning and it was hard to know what she was even thinking. "Thank you," she said, unsure what else to say. She let silence fall between, not speaking. Unable to speak. Minutes had pass before anyone even moved.

Uncomfortable in the silence, the lawyer turned to leave, without making a move to his jacket, but he froze a second later. He flexed his right hand as if he was in deep thought. "Do you wish for me to call anyone? Do you need me to get someone for you? I know this can't be easy."

The only thing that Toni wanted was for the lawyer to leave. She wasn't sure what was running through her mind as everything was going a million miles an hour, but she refused to break down in front of this man. She refused to break down in front of anyone. "No, Sir." she replied, forcing herself to turn to him. She put on the fakest grin that she could possibly put on. "My father just likes to fuck with me. No doubt this is another one of those times."

Spector had a hint of uncertainly in his eyes, and it only grew with that line. "Okay, Miss Stark, but if you need anything else, here is my card?" he said, holding out his business card for her to take.

Toni eyed the card for a second as she started to shrug off his suit jacket. It had provide warmth, but she didn't need it. She wouldn't take help from anyone. "Here's your coat," she said just as she got it off one the left shoulder.

Putting the card back in his packet, he shook his head. "No, Miss Stark. You need it more than I do. I refuse to leave you out here without a coat."

Her blood started to boil as she thought about how pathetic she was. Was that all she was good for nowadays? Just someone to pity? "Listen, buddy. I don't need your jacket," she snapped.

Spector smiled weakly. "Need? For some reason, I don't think a Stark ever had a need for anything, so no, I don't think you _need_ it, not that you would ever admit if you did. However, I'll leave you my coat, because my father taught me to be a gentleman, and this is the gentleman thing to do."

Toni did not need or want a gentleman, as it was the opposite of what she needed or wanted. "I don't-"

The lawyer put his hand up, stopping her. "If you wish to return the favor, you can bring me a cup of coffee when you return it," he said, as he turned away from her again.

"Mr. Spector." Her tone was anything but nice.

"I hope these items bring you comfort," he replied, calmly, as he turned and walked away.

Toni eyed him with an intense glare and didn't turn back to her father's grave until the lawyer disappeared out of the sight. She gave the tombstone the stink eye as she hugged the suit jacket to her body. Sure, she didn't want the jacket, but she had to admit that she needed one. "So dear oh dad, lecturing me from the grave, are you?"

She closed her eyes as she forced herself to take a deep breath. Her heart was beating far too fast to be safe. After a few deep breaths, she opened her eyes slowly and opened the smaller envelope. "Outsmarting me even from beyond," she uttered, angrily. "Can't let me win, can you? Just had to show me up?" she asked as she reached in. "That's messed up." She pulled out a letter and a picture. Each looked like they had seen better days.

Fighting back her tears, she recognized her father's handwriting on the back. She felt her anger drain as her hands started to shake. It took everything she had to keep her grip on the letter. She couldn't believe how his handwriting turned her into this shaky baby. "You probably think this is funny," she replied as she opened the letter. It wasn't until a second later that Toni felt her heart stop.

There was dried blood.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end for now.
> 
> DON'T KILL ME. Did you think Toni would let Steve have it easy? Nope. Let's hope whatever is in that letter will help.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter.
> 
> Also, side note: this is not and will not be a crossover with SUITS in any form. I just uses those names as they were the only names that I could think of for Lawyers.
> 
> Until next time.


	32. The Letter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all,
> 
> I meant to have this out sooner, but My beta and mine emails got lost in a black hole. haha. It is all good now.
> 
> And geez, everyone thought Toni was beyong cruel in the last chapter. I must say there was part of me that didn't think she was cruel enough, and was tempted to make her more cruel to him. I guess it is good that I did not.
> 
> Anyhow, I hope you like this chapter. Let me know through reviews! It is longer than I expected

**Chapter 32:**

**The Letter**

* * *

Pepper Potts was the rational one, always thinking clearly and logically. She wasn't the one to overthink or freak out, except when it came to a certain brunette. Toni could always drive the sane CEO up the wall, and most of the time, she only had to look at the Pepper to do that. Pepper didn't know what it was woman that did it. Maybe, it was the look in Toni's eyes or the fact that the brunette was always up to something. Always.

However, not knowing where Toni was was so much worse. Sure, Pepper had an understanding of where Toni was, but that the limit of it. SHIELD and the Avengers told her very little, which didn't included how they were going to get her back, if they were going to get her back. They also didn't say what the hell happened to her. They told her barely anything, besides the fact they needed access to the Mark 7. At first, Pepper was against it, not liking that plan; however, after a long talk with Rhodes, she gave in, but she felt like she had betrayed Toni by allowing it.

This was why when JARVIS alerted Pepper to Toni's sudden appearance in the Tower, Pepper dropped everything and rushed out the door. She barely had time to tell her secretary to cancel her all of meetings before bolting out of Stark Industries. As most of the world thought Toni was sunbathing on a beach, no one was knew that Toni was missing. No one knew why Pepper was excited to see Toni. No one knew her worries. No one had known why Pepper was acting like this.

However, Pepper didn't care how insane she sounded or looked as she called ahead to have the Stark Private Jet ready for take-off in a few minutes. The CEO wanted to be in New York as soon as possible. To settle her nerves, she needed to see Toni for herself and make sure she was okay. If she was, Pepper was going to wring her neck for making her worry, as she had aged by ten years because of that woman. She wouldn't be surprised if there were gray hairs growing already.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

When the town car arrived at the Tower, Pepper didn't waste a second before she dashed in. Her heels clicked loudly against the floor as she rushed through the lobby. The first place Pepper headed was the labs, knowing that it would be the first place that Toni would be. However, just like searching for something and not finding it, Toni wasn't in the first place she looked, and Pepper's irritation was growing.

Then when JARVIS informed her that Toni had left the tower a few hours ago, Pepper almost had a heart attack right on the spot. How could Toni disappear so fast after reappearing? And how could they let Toni leave? How could the love sick _Steve_ just let Toni walk out of the tower? There was no way in hell that he would've let her, as he was like Pepper. He was worried sick about Toni, so it didn't make sense that he would just let her go.

Then there was Bruce, a close friend. Did he just let Toni leave to? Did anyone try to stop her? Pepper wasn't sure why she left and no one stopped her, but she was going to get some answers. She needed answers.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

When Pepper located Steve and Bruce, they were in the lounge, sitting in a dead silence. Sitting on the couch with his back toward her, Steve was staring down, picking at something, and from the view from the doorway, Pepper couldn't see what he was picking at. However, she could tell from his tense shoulders that he was anything but happy. He was clearly upset about something, and Pepper could only guess that it was about Toni.

Across from Steve stood Bruce, who was staring at Steve with an intense look on his face. Pepper couldn't quite read it, but she knew he was in deep thought. His stance was stoic as he leaned against the bar with his arm crossed his chest. With almost every piece of hair out of place, Bruce looked exhausted, though he hadn't moved an inch to sit on the stool next to him. He just stood there in deep though, eyeing Steve.

Two unknown, elderly men were nestled on a couch next to Steve, and just like Steve and Bruce, these two men were quiet, watching the room. One of the old men was eyeing Steve, while the other scanned the room. The man with a worn cane smiled at her when he noticed her in the doorway.

Stepping into the room, Pepper studied him for a second before scanning the room for any more surprises. Staring out the window at the city's skyline, a man stood at the window wall. Though the CEO couldn't make out the man's face from her angle, she could tell from his body that he was a fit man in his late twenties, early thirties; there was no doubt that he could handle himself in a fight.

"What a view! What can I do to get a view like this?" Said man exclaimed with a chuckle. "How much do this view cost? Your first born child?"

Even though she couldn't see his face, Pepper could tell this man was quite the looker. "I wouldn't say that much," she said, loudly. "But close enough." As her voice echoed across the room, the whole room turn to her, besides the elderly man with a cane. He was still smiling as he looked at her.

"Miss Potts," Steve uttered, turning to her.

Bruce pushed himself off the bar and took a step forward. "Pepper. You must've heard."

"Yes," she replied, bitterly. "I've heard, but not from you two." She was annoyed that no one bothered to tell her that Toni had returned. If it wasn't for the AI, she would've never had known that Toni was back. Was anyone planning to tell her? Okay, she knew they would've told her eventually but when? "If it wasn't for JARVIS, would I have even known? Would you have told me? Or is this an Avenger only thing?"

"Pepper," Bruce said with a deep sigh. "It isn't like that. We hadn't informed anyone of her return yet, because we're trying to give her some space. We don't all need to jump her at the same time."

Pepper gave him a look before glancing around the room. "Space for what?" It was suddenly freezing in the room as the CEO spoke. Her voice was anything but kind.

One of the elderly gentlemen smiled lightly as he spoke, "She had gone through a lot. It's best if there isn't people coming at her from every direction."

"And who are these fine gentlemen?" she asked, trying to not sound bitter.

"Two of the Howling Commandos. Gabriel Jones and Timothy Dugan," Steve stated. His tone was odd to say the least "They served with me during World War II, and this is Trip, Gabe's grandson."

Her face soften a bit as she looked at him. Was this why Steve seemed out of it? Or was it something else happening? And why happened to Toni make cause her to need 'space'?

Trip took a step forward with hand out. "Nice to meet you," he said with smile.

Pepper shook his hand, noting his strong grip, before she stepped back and turned to Bruce. "Someone explain to me what happened? Where's Toni? And what's with Steve's gloom?" she said, loudly.

Jones and Dugan chuckled at her last question, though the Captain found it anything but amusing. "I am _not_ gloomy," he replied, coldly.

If the situation wasn't serious, Pepper would've chuckled at Steve's snappy reaction; however, something that Bruce said had her worried about Toni. "What happened to Toni? Where is she?"

"It seemed like our favorite genius snuck out of a building after a conversion with Steve," Dugan said from the sofa.

Pepper stepped to Steve, who was looking everywhere else but her. "What did you say?"

"Why do you blame me?" he replied, coldly. "You know her."

Bruce took a step forward as if to step between Steve and the angry CEO, who was shooting draggers from her eyes. "I don't think it matters what was said," Bruce said calmly. "But whatever was said, it should be taken with a grain of salt."

Steve stood suddenly. "Easy for you to say. You weren't there," he replied quietly and coldly, as he flexed his hands. "I think it's best if I leave before she returns."

Jones pushed down against the couch as he struggled to stand up. He glanced toward his silent grandson, who was watching the room silently. "Steve, stop." He called as the Super Soldier headed toward the door.

Dugan leaned forward but he didn't get to his feet right away. "If you leave now, Rogers, you'll lose her."

Steve's fist balled at his side. "You don't know what you're talking about, as she was quite clear to what she wants," he replied in a cold tone.

Pepper glanced toward Steve, studying the tension in his shoulders. Though she had no idea of what Toni said, she knew it couldn't have been anything good. However, she also knew it must've been more than that conversion to send the genius out of the tower. "What did she say?"

The Captain shook his head. "She was clear."

Bruce took a deep breath. "…I don't want to get involved in…whatever happened down in the lab, but we all need to take a deep breath and step back. Clearly, Toni isn't herself at the moment. I don't know what it is, but there's something weighing on her."

Steve gave him a look before stepping toward the door. "I don't know who you are kidding. She was exactly herself."

Pepper felt her heart drop, looking at Steve, who looked completely defeated. "Steve, don't go. Not like this. Let's all calm down before we self-destruct."

Steve glanced back at the CEO for a second, meeting her eyes, before turning back to the door.

Trip pushed off the window, stepping toward the door. Dugan was also pushing himself to his feet to chase after Steve, who was halfway out the door. "I don't know any of you and have only met Stark a couple of days ago, but it's clear that something is on her chest. She looks like she's drowning."

Pepper felt her heart race at that, because she knew this wasn't going to end well. Toni was always closed to others, never letting anyone in, though Rhodey and she could crack her shield at times. If something happened, she knew it would only be worse. The genius would never come out of her lab now, and it broke Pepper's heart.

Steve's fist balled at his side, shaking slightly. "She was cruel. The things she said."

With a deep sigh, Bruce closed his eyes and rubbed his forehead. "That doesn't make sense," he replied.

"Why doesn't it?" Pepper asked.

"She's wearing Steve's WWII dog tags," Bruce said, exhausted.

Steve turned around quickly and uttered loudly, "What?"

Bruce smiled weakly. "And when I asked her about it, she wouldn't answer, only dodged. I don't know what she was thinking, but the mere mention of your name got her heart racing. Now, I'm no expert in the ways of Toni Stark, but that means something."

The Super Soldier's heart was beating rapidly as Bruce spoke. "I need air," he replied loudly. His fists were still at his side as he stepped quickly out of the room. His departure was swift, wanting to get out of the room before anyone could say another word to him.

Jones and Dugan glanced at each other before they too headed to the door to chase after Steve. "I think we better go after him, Dum Dum," Jones said.

"It would be best." Dugan replied with a sigh.

Behind them was the smiling Trip, who was keeping a close eye on the two elderly men. It seemed that Trip was never more than a step away from the men. "I'd better go after them. My mother won't be happy if one of them breaks their hips…again."

Pepper wasn't too focus on them; her mind was on Toni and Steve. She wasn't quite sure what was going on between the two, who never seemed to stop fighting. First, they were yelling at each other, and then they were refusing to talk to each other. Then, it seemed like they were love sick over the other, and then they were fighting again. It left Pepper confused; however, whatever it was, they needed to have a real conversion, which was difficult to pull out of Toni.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

In the thin, yellow envelope were two items, and each was different in age and size, but both had fold marks running down their centers, signaling how often they were looked at. Besides the folds, each had a great deal of wear and tear, signaling to the number of times they had been stuffed into a pocket. One of the items, a picture, was faded at the edges and along the fold. There were also stress cracks through the picture, but none of the cracks took away from it. Each of the three smiles were very much visible, and it was clear how happy the three were. The family photo of three was of a young girl and her parents, at her fifth birthday. Cake was everywhere as it seemed like the girl started a cake fight, but no one in the picture looked angry or upset at the mess.

The second item was a letter, a lengthy letter. Like the photo, it was faded along the folds and edges, but unlike the photos, the letter didn't have the same level of wear and tear. It looked younger than the photo, a clear sign that photo was taken years before the letter was written. However, the edges had little rips and folds to them. There were a few faded spots, but being faded in only a few spots, the letter wasn't impossible to read.

However, age wasn't the only thing making the letter harder to read, as the author seemed to be in a hurry. It was clear that the author normally had smooth penmanship as the first three words were neat, but as the letter went on, the words got closer together, almost bending together. There were even hesitation marks up and down the letter. It appeared as the letter went that the man was no longer trying to keep it neat and clean.

That wasn't what caught the reader's attention; it was the stains on both the letter and the photo. Besides the yellowing, there were dark spots on both. There was no pattern to these darken spots, but it was clear to what they were. The writer had cried as he wrote the letter; he had exposed himself in the letter, to the reader. He had given all that he had to write the letter.

It also brought out the reader's tears, though it was more than the words. There was another stain that caught the reader's attention. It was decade old blood that was speckled up the left side of the letter and photo. There wasn't enough to make the letter unreadable, but it made it harder to stomach. It was clear that this letter and photo was on the author as he died. Though the situation of his death was unable determinable from the items, it was heartbreaking to read the last thing the author wrote.

However, she had to read it. In shaky hands and tears running down her face, the reader read.

 

_Toni,_

 

 

_This is the hardest thing that I ever had to write. It's a struggle to keep the pen to paper as I don't want to be writing this. I don't want to be saying goodbye to you like this. I want to be holding you in my arms, never letting go. I want to stay with you and watch you get married. I want to see you have kids of your own. Kids that I want to spoil and get high on sugar just to send them back to you. I want to see them drive you crazy._

_There're so many things that I wanted to do with you, for you. But I can't. Yes, I heard what you said, when you left. I know what today is and what's going to happen to today. I'm going to die today, and though it may had taken me some time to come to terms with it, I have accepted it. No, I'm not ready to die, and no, I don't want to die, but I accept it. If it is meant to happen, it will happen._

_I know what you were trying to do when you warned me, and I love you for it. I love that you care that much for me to risk everything, especially considering where our relationship started. You hated me at first, wanting nothing to do with me, and I must say that I didn't care for you either, the mystery woman with a loud ass mouth. However, that all changed, and I enjoyed what our relationship turned into. I enjoyed getting to know you, even with the fights._

_Though I don't know what you thought or are thinking, I hope I grew on you. Well, I think I did. However, maybe it would be better for you if you didn't care. Maybe, you wouldn't be hating yourself right now if you hated me, and I hate that you think this is your fault. Because it isn't and I don't blame you at all. Don't forget that, because I will come out of my grave and knock some sense into you. Trust me I will._

_Yes, I understand the guilt that is eating you up and that the need to tell me was overwhelming. I understand how you blame yourself, but you're_ _**WRONG.** _ _It's not your fault. It'll never be your fault. Never. You get that? Never. Yes, I'll keep writing it until you listen, so you give up first now. You get it? NEVER. You aren't the one, who's going to pull the trigger, so stop blaming yourself. None of it's your fault. Not Sergeant Barnes. Not Steve. Not mine. Not anyone's._

 _Go out and live your life. Enjoy what life has to offer. You deserve to be happy, even if you don't think you do. Find someone, settle down, and start a family. Yes, kids. As a parent, I have the right to bug my child for grandchildren, so deal with it. Besides, we need someone to carry on the Stark_ _n_ _ame. Yes, I expect my grandchildren to carry our last name. Your spouse be damned. You can tell him that I said that too. He won't be able to fight your dead father's wishes._

 _But that aside, you do deserve to be happy. I know you don't think you deserve to be loved, but you do. You know I felt the same until I met your mother? I almost pushed her away, not believing that someone like her could love someone like me. Seriously, who could love a nutcase like me? I am and was a_ _**complete** _ _asshole to everyone, but she saw through that. She loved me for me, including all of my faults._

_I want to you to find someone too. I want you to find someone who love you for you. Don't be afraid to let someone in. I know that I was afraid, and again, I almost lost your mother. Don't be like me and don't deny that you're doing it, because I know you are. You did it with Rogers and Barnes, granted I know why now. But don't push that special someone away, because it'll be the worst thing that you ever do. You'll regret it. Trust me._

_I know I'm asking a lot for you to trust me, to take my advice since I am/was a horrible father to you. When we sent you back to your rightful time, I made a promise to be the best father that I could be, and for years, I was or I thought I was, but I failed when you needed me the most. I failed horribly. I hate myself for that, and I don't blame you for hating me. I know I would hate me if I was you. I broke every promise that I made to you, and I can't say sorry enough._

_I don't know if you remember but I attempted to call you today, the day of my death. It was a few hours ago for me. It was years for you, so I don't know if you remember. I was trying to apologize one last time, but you must've thought that I was crazy. I must've sounded crazy, going on and on about random shit. It was no wonder that you rushed me off the phone with a few shorts words. I understand because why would you want to talk to me after everything?_

_Besides, the call was selfish. It really was, because I wanted more than to apologize. I wanted to hear your voice, even if your words were anything but friendly. I wanted to reinsure myself that I made the right decision about not telling the younger you the truth, and I know that I did now. There was no need to worry you. No need to guilt you with my death, even though I already know that you will be guilt ridden._

_But again, Toni, please don't be guilt ridden. It's my time to go. It's my time to answer for all of the things that I've done. To change the future just to save myself would be selfish, and I refuse to be selfish anymore. I've been selfish for most of my life, and it's time that I do what's right. I need to do the right thing and face my death, to take my death unto myself. There's no one to fault but me. It's my fault._ _**ALL MY FAULT** _ _. Don't forget that, because as I said before, I'll come out of my grave and knock some sense into you._

_And please don't forget that I love you. I always had-even when it didn't look like it- and always will love you. I may have been a horrible father. I may have been cold, hard, and distant with you, but there was one thing I don't regret: You. Sure, you aren't perfect…Sorry, but someone had to tell you the truth. At least it was me, right?_

_Anyhow, I do_ _**not** _ _regret how you and how you turned out. Sure, you're a loud, pain in the rear end smartass, who doesn't know when to shut up, with an ego to boot. Yea, you think too highly of yourself just like your old man, but I wouldn't change that for anything. I love how you turned out, even if you're hard headed. I love the fact that you speak your mind, even when you pissed everyone off. I love that you know what you want. I love that you refuse to give up. I love the bullheaded woman that you turn out to be. Don't forget that either, Kiddo. Please. Don't._

_Sure, time traveling is a pain in ass, and there're so many unwritten rules that it could drive anyone crazy, but it was a gift. A gift that I wouldn't give back no matter what. I got to meet one of the strongest women I know. It let me know that you'll be okay after I'm gone. It let me know that you will be able to handle everything that life throws at you. For that knowledge, I wouldn't change anything. I'll take all the pain in the world for that._

_Besides it gave me one of my two favorite pictures that I always carry on me. With the first one, I didn't know the photo was being take at the time, only coming across it a few years later. It's a picture of us working in the lab during World War II. Working on what? I don't recall, but it's that smile on that your face, which could light up a room, that drew me to the photo. You looked so happy, so at home, working on that gadget. I should've realized sooner that you were my daughter, but I didn't. I was an idiot for not see it. You're just like me._

_The second picture is from your fifth birthday party. It's a photo of the three of us, you, your Mother, and me, just after you smashed the cake in our faces. You had the whole room laughing, including Maria and me, who were covered in cake. Granted that we were surrendered by five year olds with sticky fingers, it was a fun day for everyone, even if we were red the next day from the cake dye. Did you know it took days for that dye to wash off? My board of directors was laughing at me for days, and that kiddo, is all your fault. All your fault. I hope your future kids get you back for that. Dye you all colors of the rainbow._

… _I think I wrote you novel here, Toni. Wasn't planning on it, but there is/was so many things that I needed to say. Not sure if this letter covers everything, but everything in here is from the heart. I love you, kid, and no matter what you do or say, I will love you. And again, I'll_ _ **never**_ _blame you for anything, even if everyone else is. I'll_ _ **never**_ _give up on you, even if everyone else has. I'll_ _ **never**_ _stop believing in you so you shouldn't give up on yourself either._

_Live, Toni. Live. And remember, I love you with all of my heart._

_With all my heart, love your,_

_Father._

_P.S. Just to let you know in regards to Barnes and Rogers, I would not have approved of either of them. They weren't good enough for my baby girl, granted no one is in my eyes, but I didn't fall for Steve's innocent look. He wasn't fooling me, and I knew Barnes_ _**wasn't** _ _innocent._

Toni was shaking, unable to speak, and for a while, she was still as stone, unable to move.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

It was just Bruce and Pepper alone in the lounge, and for a while, it was dead silent between the two. The tension could be cut with a knife, and to make things worse, Pepper was still steaming at the fact that no one told her that Toni was back. Sure, she guessed that they were correct that they didn't want to overwhelm the genius, but she wasn't SHIELD. She was one of the closest people to Toni, and she was one of the few people who could get to her. She knew when to push and when not to push.

"We didn't mean to exclude you, Pepper," Bruce said, breaking the silent. "Just after the way that Steve stomped in here after talking to her, I knew she needed space."

Pepper stepped toward him. It wouldn't be wise to yell at him, but she couldn't help it. She was just so angry. "And you let her go?"

Bruce let out a sigh. "I didn't. We didn't even know that she was gone. Trust me, I wouldn't have let her leave."

She could hear the worry in his voice, but that wasn't enough for her. "You should've alerted me." Lately, she had been feeling left out, an outsider to Toni's new world, and she felt like the current events had sealed it.

"Yes," he said, blowing out. "We should have, and I'm sorry."

Before Pepper could reply, the door to the helipad burst opened, and a very angry Rhodes stomped in. Without him even speaking, Pepper knew the man was fuming, as his eyes were anything but friendly. The CEO wasn't sure why he was so angry, but the man looked like he had been through hell. Though he was covered in mud from head to toe, she could see that he was lined with scratches. _What the hell happened to him?_

Bruce stepped toward Rhodes, putting himself between Rhodes and Potts. "Are you okay?"

Rhodes only gave Bruce a look before he made his way toward Pepper. Falling behind the Colonel was Romanoff and Barton, who were also spotting angry looks as well. "Pepper, I get you weren't happy with me taking out the Mark 7, but I was in a middle of the battle," he snapped.

Confused, Pepper stared at him for a second, wondering what was going on. "What are you talking about? What about the Mark 7?"

When Natasha narrowed her eyes just right, it was like she was looking right through you, and it was the look she was giving Pepper right now. If looks could kill, everyone would be dead from that stare. The master assassin looked angry, granted she always looked angry. "His access to the Mark 7 has been revoked."

Pepper's eyes widened because there was only one person who could've done that, and that was Toni. Yes, Toni loathed Rhodes touching her personal suits, but she wasn't a dick enough to do it while he was piloting the suit…okay, she would, but not in a middle of a mission, and if Toni did, Pepper knew that Bruce and Trip were right. Toni was drowning.

Barton sighed. "I get it. It was funny to see Rhodes huff it back to the Quinjet, but it could've been deadly. Sure, no one likes Rhodes, but geez, trying to kill him? That's a bit much."

Rhodes turned to Barton, giving him a nasty look. "Geez, thanks."

"Just being honest." Barton said with a shrug.

Rhodey narrowed his eyes at him before he turned his attention to Pepper. "Why did-"

"If I may interrupt you, Colonel Rhodes," JARVIS said, "Miss Potts does not have the authority to revoke access to the Mark 7 or any other mobile armor."

Bruce's eyes widen as a realization came upon him, but before he could voice it, Natasha spoke, "If Pepper didn't do it, then who did it?"

"Miss Stark revoked your access 4.2 hours ago," JARVIS answered.

Both Barton and Rhodes' eyes widened. "W-what? Why?" Rhodes said, stumbling over his words.

"Miss Stark's words were, 'Let's make him walk, because again, sharing is not caring, and I don't share well.'" The AI replied.

Bruce chuckled. "That would be Toni for you."

Rhodes' surprise was still present on his face as he spoke, "Toni's here? Where is she? In the lab?"

JARVIS spoke again, "No, she left 3.5 hours ago."

Barton took a step forward, his anger becoming visible with each step. "Why would you let her leave?" he asked, holding his bow tightly.

"Why didn't anyone inform us?" Romanoff asked.

 _At least, I wasn't only one,_ Pepper thought to herself. "No one was informed," Pepper replied.

Rhodes' eye switched. "So where is she?" he looked up as if the AI was in the ceiling.

Pepper's eyes widened, because she couldn't believe that she forgot to ask. Of course, JARVIS would know where Toni was. "JARVIS, do you know where Toni is?"

The AI didn't answer right away. "Yes, I am aware of Miss Stark's current location."

"Then where is she, you stupid AI?" Barton said.

If JARVIS was human, he might've chuckled at Clint's outburst. "I must contest, Agent Barton. As I am connected to both Stark Industries mainframe and the World Wide Net, my knowledge is ever growing. It would be impossible for me to 'stupid.'"

Bruce laughed at JARVIS' remark, as the smart ass genius programed the AI with some sass.

Pepper glanced at Bruce, holding back her own laugh. "So where is she? Tell us, JARVIS."

"I am not authorized to release her location. She has forbidden me," he replied.

The group let out a collective fuck as JARVIS spoke. Each knew there was no way to make JARVIS tell them as it went against his programming. For a few long seconds, the room fall silent with Natasha being the first one to move. She went to the closest control panel, and before anyone could react, she pulled out a device from her pocket.

"What are you doing?" Clint asked, eyeing her.

JARVIS responded before Natasha could, granted the assassin had no interest in responding. "There is no use, Agent Romanoff," the AI responded, as the control panel on the wall suddenly turned black. "Though Miss. Stark made my firewalls impenetrable, I must insist you cease your actions."

Natasha let out a huff. "She's a child."

Bruce let out a sigh, because there was no denying that Toni was a child at times. "Maybe, but we should give her time."

Pepper turned, glaring as she was sick of hearing that. She hated the idea of giving Toni space, because that woman did stupid things when given space.

Maybe, Bruce was right, but she refused to believe that.

Rhodes clearly didn't like that idea. "She dumped me in the middle of nowhere! I want to talk to her." He stepped toward the door. "I'll find her on my own. I know her well enough to know where she could've gone."

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

For a while, Toni just stood there in front of her parent graves, unmoving. Even with the jest about children, her father's letter shook her to the core, and she couldn't stop trembling. How could he say all of those things? He really loved her? He was proud of her? Believed in her? To know her father thought all of those things meant everything to her. "Geez, old man," she said, softly. "Still getting to me." He had broken through her shield.

Shaking her head, Toni glanced back down at the letter in her hands, and unable to stop herself, she reread the letter. Even with the second reading, it touched her heart, leaving her light of breath. How could that man leave her in tears? How could he turn her into a crybaby?

With a deep breath, Toni smiled slightly as she glanced down at the photo of her fifth birthday. Granted most of her memories were clouded, it was to forget how different her father was in the beginning of her life, and this photo was proof to that. This letter was proof that her loving father was still there through it all. He was always there, when it didn't look like it. It was-

Wait, the letter said two photos…

Toni felt her heart race as she searched the thin envelope for the missing photo; however, no matter how hard she stared, there was no other photo. The yellow envelope was empty. With growing panic, she searched the ground, hoping that she had dropped it when she pulled the letter out. It had to be somewhere, right?

According to the letter, Howard always carried the second photo with him, but so it had to be here. Maybe, it was in the bigger envelope; however, the only thing in that envelope was the journal that she had kept in the past. At first, she was ready to toss it, because it was a bad remainder of the past that she wanted to forget. However, just as she was about to toss it, she noticed her father's notes. Quickly flipping through the pages, she noticed he had written something on each page. Only scanning the notes, she could tell that they ranged from suggestions on her tech to little stories that he wanted her to know. Again, Toni found herself struggling to breathe. "Geez, Father. Still putting me to shame," she said, scanning over a note.

Shaking her head, she closed the journal and stuffed it in the rim of her pants. She would go page through page, reading everything that he had written later, but her desire to find that missing photo was greater. She needed to find it. She just needed to. It was one of the last things her father held.

Fighting back the panic, she tried to logically and calmly think where it could possibly be. It had to be somewhere, right? Someone didn't just take it, right? Maybe, she could speak to that Lawyer. He could know where the photo was. If he didn't know, Toni didn't know what she would do. Sure, it was just a picture, but it was one of the few photos of her father and her. Plus, it was a one of a kind photo of her father and she in the past.

Toni turned to the Mark 7, which had arrived at her side when she was reading the letter. "JARVIS, can you give me the number for the Law firm Spector and Ross?"

"Miss Stark, the others had inquired about your location," JARVIS replied with instead. "I think it would be wise to go back to the Tower."

Toni didn't know if she ever wanted to go back to the Tower with one of the reasons being Steve. She didn't think that she could face him, after everything that she had said. She was beyond cruel to that man, who had been nothing but kind to her. She cut him down at the knees, knowing exactly what to say. She didn't mean any of it; in fact, it was the opposite, even if she refused to admit it to anyone. She knew why she did it, as she would be saving Steve the heartache. Even if she was able to get over her own guilt, she wasn't relationship material at all, even if her father thought she was. With that regard, he was wrong. Dead wrong.

Even worse, he expected her to have kids. Her children? One, she had no idea at all of what to do with them, and two, she would probably kill them on accident. How did one even feed a baby? Then there were diapers. Seriously, her with kids? Who the hell was her father kidding? Wait, her father didn't raise her as he left her to nanny, which was another sign that Toni would be a horrible parent. She was just like her father.

"I take it the family is back in town?" she asked, look over her Iron Man suit over. The suit was in one piece, though she would have to patch up some marks on it. It looked like it took a beating.

"Yes, Miss."

Toni kept back her growl as she held the letter tightly in her hand. On one hand, she knew she should go back to the tower, as there were some questions that she needed to answer and have answered. Plus, there was no doubt that the team was worried. On the other hand, she had no interest in facing anyone. She wanted to hide in her lab, though she kept telling herself that she had to face it. Even if it pained her, her father was right. "Where's Steve?" she asked, not wanting to see him at all.

JARVIS didn't answer, annoying the genius. "Answer me. Where's Steve?!" she demanded. "Don't make me regret creating you. Or maybe, I should reprogram you into a 7 year old girl." With the Lawyer's suit jacket draped over her shoulders, she looked tiny even with her arms folded across her chest.

"Behind you, Stark."

Toni's heart raced as it wasn't JARVIS who spoke. Turning around slowly, the genius came face to face with the last person that she wanted to see. How the hell was this possible? How did he find her here? Why did he even look for her? "S-Rogers…" she uttered, clearly shocked.

His eyes were drilling into her, and it send chills down her spine. His eyes were anything but friendly, and they drained her of any faith that she had done the right thing. With a single look, he made her doubt everything that she knew and did, but she still struggled with admitting that she was wrong. Maybe what she did would save him. This pain he was feeling now wouldn't be as great as the pain he would be feeling down the run if she let this relationship happen. But what did she do with her pain?

With a deep breath, she met his glare with her own, though that was harder to do than she expected. She hated the look he was giving her. With his glare, it was hard to imagine him as her shrimp, a guy that she had spent nights talking to. It was hard to see him like this, as at one point, she played his wingman, a friend, but she had no one to blame to herself.

She had screwed herself, and she knew it. However, she wasn't the one to admit her screw ups.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end for now.
> 
> I hope you like this chapter.
> 
> So what you think going to happen next? Think another fight is coming between the two love birds?


	33. Let it Grow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First, Thanks to Wintersupersoldiers beta this for me
> 
> And second, Look only 15 days to update this! I was in a writing mood lately. :) So you don't have to wait so ling.
> 
> Anyhow, I hope you like this Chapter.

**Chapter 33:**

**Let It Grow**

* * *

"Rogers," Toni uttered. She was at a loss of words for a few moments, as her mind couldn't wrap itself around the fact that Steve was here in front of her. Why was he here? How did she not scare him off before with her cruel words? "The man of justice, peace, and the American Way. What are you doing here, Cap?" she asked, trying to keep her emotions in check.

Steve stood a few feet from her, not moving, as he stared at her. His eyes were drilling into her, and it was unnerving to no end. To make things worse, he wasn't speaking.

The genius couldn't take the silence. It was driving her crazy. Why couldn't he just say something? Anything? "I thought I made myself clear, Rogers," she said, trying to sound as cruel as she could be. "Are you look-"

"Shut up," he yelled, interrupting her.

Toni was shocked by the coldness in his voice, and it stunned her for a few seconds. It was a struggle to find her words, but she refused to be silenced by him, even if she had no idea of what to say. "Excuse me?" she said. "You did not-"

Steve's glare only deepened. "Did I not tell you to shut up, Stark?" he said, as he finally took a step to her.

Hearing his harsh tone, it filled Ton with a few different emotions. One was anger, because no one was allowed to talk to her like that, like she was a child, and she was close to snapping on him for that. However, guilt and sadness also filled her, because she had brought this pain onto him. "Why w-"

He stepped even closer, almost threatening. "What part of shut up do you not understand?" he asked, staring down at her.

"The shutting up part. You know me, never one to shut up," she replied, quickly. She eyed the super soldier, never seeing this level of anger pointed at her, and it truly scared her. "Just love to making you cry."

Steve left out a heavy sigh. "Why do you keep doing this?" he asked, clearly annoyed.

Trying get over her fear, Toni gave him a confused look as she pulled the suit jacket tighter. "So do you want me to talk? Or not? Geez, Rogers. Make up your mind."

He took another step forward her, his anger lessening but still very much present. "You frustrate me to no end! Do you know this, Toni?" He asked, loudly. "You're driving me crazy, and I don't know what to do. I'm racking my brain." He paused for few seconds, thinking. "But stop pushing me away!"

Her heart started to race as he referred to her by her first name. Not only did that frustrate her, it made her slight of breath, because she had tried so hard to get him to refer to her by her last name in their last conversation. When he did, she knew she had gotten to him, exceeded in pushing him away, but yet, he was here, and she was confused. "I drive everyone crazy, Rogers," she replied. Steve gave her a look, and it send shivers down her spine. "So why are you here?"

"If I mean nothing to you, why are you wearing my dog tags?" he asked, his eyes drilling into her. "And I want an honest answer for once."

For a few long seconds, Toni just stared at him with her month hanging open. Without meaning to, her hands went to the tags and gripped them tight. The cold metal cut into her hands, but she didn't let go. She was holding on for dear life in the hope of hiding the tears from Rogers. How did he know? The only person who knew was Bruce, but why would he tell the Captain? "I don't know what you're talking about."

Steve stepped toward the brunette, who a step back for each step the blond took to her. "Then show me."

Toni felt herself shake as she backed into her father's headstone. Why was he doing this? Why couldn't he just let things be? Did she want him to leave her alone? She wasn't sure, because she wasn't sure if she could handle all of her guilt on her own. "No."

A soft smile appeared in his face. "You know that tells me everything."

"Why are you pushing? Didn't you hear me when I told you I was playing you? It was all just a game to get what I want," she said, her voice shaking. She knew she wasn't fooling anyone with her shaky tones.

"I heard you, but you're not a very good actress," he replied, as he stood a few inches from her.

She took a deep breath as she held the dog tags close, refusing to let go. "I don't know what you're talking about. I am a great actress." Rogers were standing so close that she could feel his hot breath on her, and it drove her crazy.

"You can't tell me that our late nights meant nothing. You can't tell me that the nickname game meant nothing. You can't tell me our kiss meant nothing. It-"

"You have some nerve!" she snapped interrupting him. She remembered that kiss after she had awaken from her coma. It wasn't long before she had learned of Bucky's death. "How can that kiss mean anything when you were swapping split with Peggy seconds later?"

Steve kept his glance on Toni, but she could see him falter a bit. "That was a mistake."

"A mistake? Really?" she asked, trying to force that image out of her head. She hated how it felt to see them kissing, and she hated Steve for making her feel like that.

He stared at her for a few long seconds before he answered, "Phillips told me I did a great disservice to my best bud for kissing you, and I couldn't disagree. I knew how Bucky felt about you, and I didn't want to betray Bucky's memory. I didn't want to dishonor Bucky by going after you."

For a few long seconds, she just stared at the super soldier, recalling a few choice looks that Phillips and Rogers were giving each other while Howard held her. "What? You backed off because of Phillips?" she asked, and for a second, Toni didn't hate anyone more than him.

Steve nodded. "I thought he was right."

"Thought?"

"Yes, I realized he wasn't, but by then, it was too late."

Toni couldn't take Steve's soft tone anymore, and she would rather face his anger. She knew how to handle him then. With his soft tones, she had no idea and wanted nothing more than to bolt, but there was nowhere that she could go. She was trapped. "Why was that?"

There was a short pause. "Because I love you, and you deserve the truth."

Toni felt a tremor run through her as she leaned back against the gravestone. How could three little words affect her so much? Why did he have to say _those_ words to her? "No." She was shaking.

"Yes, and I deserve the truth."

His words snapped her back to reality, and it took a few seconds for her to focus on the determined man in front of her. "I gave you the truth," she replied.

"Which time?" he asked.

Her story was falling apart, and she knew he would figure out the truth soon, learned that she left Bucky and her father to die. He would hate her, and even if he didn't right away, he would hate her soon enough. "What do you what from me?" she asked, trying to hold back her tears.

Steve stared at her, eyeing her blood red eyes. "I want a real conversion, Toni. Talk to me."

Why couldn't he understand that she didn't want to talk? She was tired of talking? She tired of feeling things… _What about your father?_ She thought to herself as she flashed back to the letter. She was doing the exact thing that her father told her not to do. She would be getting an ear full from him if he was here.

"Toni, please," he said, almost begging after a few long seconds of silent.

Freaking, she ducked beneath his arms and bolted. She didn't give him another look as she tried to disappear into the trees. She held her father's letter close to her chest as she reached back to the journal, which was slipping from the rim of her pants. As it held her father's words, she couldn't bear to lose it. She couldn't lose the last tie she had to her father, who had shown her that she could be loved. That he did love her.

She could hear Steve yelling at her, begging her to stop running, but she couldn't stop. She couldn't, not with everything that had happened. It was killing her to face him, while she tried to hold everything in. Why was it so easy for him to break through her shields? She had worked years to build them, and with one look, he could bring them all down. For that, she hated him. How could he do this to her? How could he love her? She couldn't understand how that was possible.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Pepper was pacing the Avenger's Tower, waiting for some word on Toni. Unlike Toni, the CEO knew this tower wasn't Stark Tower anymore and wasn't going to fight that losing battle. However, it didn't mean she liked it. She hated how involved Toni had gotten with the Avengers, wishing there was some distance between them. She hated the constant worry that Toni might not come back. She hated that Toni put her life on the line everyday by being Iron Man, and she wanted her to stop. She couldn't take another scare like this.

"Care to talk about it?" Bruce asked, bring her out of thoughts. "I know I'm not the best, but I'll listen."

Barton eyed the CEO from the bar as he poured himself a drink. It was just the three of them in the lounge. Romanoff had disappeared soon after Rhodes having the same mission. She went to find Toni, though her motives might have been different than Rhodes. However, the chances were higher that the master assassin would find the genius before anyone else did. No one could hide from Romanoff.

Pepper glanced toward Barton as he poured himself a drink. "I'm good." She wasn't in the mood to talk to any of them, because in her mind, they all were at fault for whatever happened to Toni. As soon as she could, she was taking Toni and bringing her back to Malibu no matter what the brunette said. She couldn't let her stay here anymore.

Bruce glanced toward Clint, who was still eyeing Pepper. He took a deep breath as he let out sigh. He opened his month to speak, but nothing came out. He closed his month after a few short seconds, only to open it again, though it was the same result. No words formed on his tongue. He let out another sigh.

"You're planning on taking Toni back with you?" Clint said, anything but friendly. "Away from the Avengers."

Not knowing how he knew she was thinking that, Pepper gave him a look, but she didn't respond. She didn't have time for this argument, nor did she want to have this argument, because nothing they said would change her mind. It was for the best to get Toni out of this Tower and back home, where she would be able to breathe. She wouldn't have so many things weighting her down. She wouldn't have to worry about dying all the time.

Bruce jolted up from his seat as he stared wide eye at Barton before he turned to the CEO. "What?!"

"I can see it in her face," Clint said, holding the glass close to his lips. His eyes were narrow as he stared at her.

Was she really that readable? "I think it would be best," she said, knowing it would be useless to deny it now.

Bruce rubbed his temper as he thought about Pepper's plan. "Toni should have a say in this."

Yes, Pepper knew he was right, but Toni didn't always think clearly, always doing things half-cocked. The CEO couldn't help but wonder where Toni would be without her. Would she even be alive, considering how many times that she had to force the genius to eat? "She doesn't know what's good for her," she replied.

Clint slammed the glass down, careful not to break it. "She isn't a child. Stop treating her like one."

Pepper glared, because she wasn't treating Toni like child. She was treating her how she needed to be treated; she needed someone to watch her, to tell her to take care of herself. "What she needs is to get away, and stopping risking her life on a normal basis. She isn't a super anything." She couldn't take it anymore. What if Toni died? "What if she gets hurt and can't recover? She isn't an agent or a soldier. She can't handle it."

"It isn't her, who can't handle it. It's you, who can't handle it," Clint shot back.

Bruce let out a sigh. "Easy, Clint," he said. "But he has a point. Toni is an adult, and you can't make choices for her." He gave her a slight smile as he took a deep breath. "However, I get it. I know this isn't easy for you, but we can't just make decision for her."

Oh, yes, she could, and she would. "You don't k-"

"Did…I miss something?" Rhodes asked, as he stepped into the room. With a raised eyebrow, he glanced between Clint, Bruce, and Pepper, who were all glaring at each other. The tension could be cut with a knife.

Pepper let out a sigh as she turned to Rhodes. To her surprise, he hadn't entered the room alone, but to her dismay, it wasn't with a certain Brunette. "I thought you were looking for Toni," she said, her tone was anything but warm.

Rhodes put his hands up as if to show he was surrendering to her. "I did," he replied, "It's just harder than I thought. She wasn't at any of her normal haunts, and I can't figure out where she went. I thought…well, hoped that-"

Pepper couldn't believe any of this was happening. How could they lose her again? Was this all Steve's fault? "And this is why!" She snapped turning back to Clint. "This is why I am bringing Toni back with me. This act of hers only got worse."

"You're looking at it wrong," Dugan stated as he stepped in deeper into the room. He leaned heavily on his worn cane. "You forget what this team has done for her."

Pepper tried to keep back her glare, because she knew she needed to calm down; however, it was so hard lately. She had been feeling out of the loop lately, and it was only made worse with Toni's disappearance. "I thought you three were looking for Captain Rogers," she asked. She kind of hated that the Captain right now.

Trip's smile did not falter under Pepper's intense glare. "Not even I could keep up with Captain America. He was on a mission, and there was no chance we could've kept up with him."

Pepper threw her arms up in annoyance, unable to believe what was going on. How could they lose both Steve and Toni in the same day? What else could happen? The sky start falling?

Jones stepped forward, smiling as well. "Knowing Steve, he'll find her and bring her back."

Clint smiled as he picked his cup back up. "Good. He better. Mommy and Daddy need to get together, so we can be one big happy family."

Bruce chuckled as Pepper gave Barton a look. When did Toni and Steve become the mother and father of this group? She wasn't sure how good those two would be together, though he might give Toni something to hold on to. He could ground her, which was what she needed, but Pepper was scared that he might do the opposite. He could end up destroying her.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

There was a point where Steve wondered if he should gave up and stop chasing Toni; however, that very thought made his stomach uneasy. He hated the idea of not being with her, and he knew if he gave up, he would regret it. He regretted it before and he would now. He would regret not loving her, and besides, he was getting to her. Her reactions were clue enough, which was why he followed her. He could see the struggle in her eyes. He could see her fear.

With a deep breath, he followed after her, giving her some space to run, as she needed the space, though he wouldn't let her get to far away. He would catch up with her in no time once she stopped, and he would approach her again and get her to tell the truth. He would get her to talk about whatever was haunting her. He could tell by the looks in her eyes that this ran deeper than just him, and judging from where he found her, he knew it had to do with her father.

 _Howard_ , he thought, wondering what he would think of the situation. What would that man do if he was here now? Not the young 1940's version of Howard, but the older adult version of Howard. What would the older father version of Howard be like? He couldn't imagine the harsh version of Howard that Toni portrayed, as he could only see Howard as the caring man that he knew. Sure, he had an ego on him, but Steve had to believe that Howard would be here for his daughter when she needed it. And if he wasn't, Steve would make him.

Steve took another deep breath, wondering when he had been gotten in so deep. How did he love her that it hurt to be away from her? Hurt to see her hurting? How did he fall for her, when she always kept him at arm's length? How could've he had fallen for her when she kept pushing him away? He wasn't sure, but he knew he was going to fight for her, even if she was cruel to him. However, he knew it was all an act now, and he was stupid before for thinking she meant any of that. He wouldn't fall for it again.

When the genius stopped running, the Captain found her at a base of the big, leafy tree on the edge of the mostly empty Cemetery. The parking lot, a few feet over, was separated from the green fields by a huge metal gate with one opening; her white Audi was parked near the opening, making for an easy escape for her. It was the only vehicle in the lot accept for two cemetery vehicles, a black SUV, and a lone motorcycle, which looked oddly familiar. Next to Toni stood her Iron Man suit, which landed with a light thud when it dropped from the sky, and it stood close only a yard way, acting like a body guard.

He eyed the armor before he glanced down at Toni, who looked tiny in that oversize coat. There was a part of him that wondered where she had gotten the coat, but he was grateful she had something to wrap herself in. It was cold, and it provided some kind of protection for her. In her hands, she held a journal and an old letter, and he could see the death grip she had on them. He didn't know what was written on them, but he knew it had to mean something for her hold on them so tightly.

Steve closed his eyes wondering how he should approach her, though he knew either way would probably get the same reaction. He knew that she would fight him like she always did. She would throw insults and would strike-

"Steve."

The soldier cursed to himself, not noticing anyone coming up behind him. Turning around slow, he let out sigh as he found himself staring down Romanoff. He wasn't sure how she found them, but he had given up a long time ago, trying to figure it out. "I thought that bike looked familiar."

Natasha gave him a look, as if that was an answer to his statement, and took a step toward Toni. "I have seen those shoulders before," she said, eyeing Toni, who hadn't moved.

"Why are you here?" he asked, unable to look away from Toni. He had also seen those shoulders before, and he didn't need anyone to tell him what they meant.

She folded her arms across her chest as she turned to him. "Stark is a friend. I wasn't going to let her disappear again," she replied, calmly. There was something in Natasha's tone that Steve had rarely heard. There was a softness to it.

"How did you find her here?" he asked.

Natasha didn't answer him right away, allowing a few long seconds to pass before she said anything. "I have to keep some of my secrets, Rogers, but for now on, I am bugging every one of her cars."

"I'm surprised you didn't do that already," he replied with a smile. He wished she had, so it wouldn't have taken so long for them to find her. It had taken a few hours to track her down, as this had been the last place that he had looked for her, not expecting her to come here.

She gave him a look. "It wasn't for a lack of trying, but I am determined now."

Steve could've chuckled at the look in her eyes, because he could tell that she was determined, and that was almost as scary as when Toni was determined. _Toni_ , he thought, turning back to her. She had yet to move from her spot or spotted them. She was curled up, trying to hide.

Natasha's eyes softened as she looked at him. "Steve," she started, "Stop standing here and talk to her."

He let out a sigh, because he knew this and didn't need her to tell him that. "I know," he said. He just needed to figure out what to say, because he couldn't risk saying the wrong thing and pushing her away.

"Potts is planning to take Stark back to Malibu with her," Natasha revealed, when Steve didn't make a move.

The Captain felt his heart fall as he turned to her. His shock was present on his face as he started at the super spy. His mind started to go in warp drive, as his mouth hanged open. "What?"

"So whatever you're going to do. Do it _now_ , because I don't think Stark will put up much of a fight in this state. You're the only one would be able to convince Stark to stay."

The idea of Toni leaving the Tower and heading to Malibu didn't sit well with him at all. Yes, he knew she had a house there, and stayed there a lot throughout the year, but he didn't want her to leave like this. Without another word, he made his way over to Toni, who looked up as she heard his feet steps. Their eyes met, and no one said anything for a while.

"Oh, look it's the Stars and Stripes," she said, finally after a few long seconds of silent. "Are you all spangled today?"

Steve hated when she played this game, but if he wanted to get to through to her, he would have to play. Without saying a word, he sat on the ground and scooted close to her. He could feel her itching to get away, but he wrapped an arm around her, pulling her into his chest. He could feel her struggle in his arms, but he didn't let her go, not this time. Instead, he tucked her head under his chin and place a kiss to her head. His fingers danced along her skin, as he tried to comfort her. He wanted her to know he wasn't giving up.

After a few long moments of struggling, Toni finally settled in his arms, burying her face in his chest. "You smell like America," she uttered.

"Oh, yea? What does America smell like?" he asked, letting out a small chuckle. He glanced down at her, catching sight of the tags hanging from her neck. Granted he could only catch a few letters from them, he could tell she was wearing two sets and who they belonged to. It didn't take an idiot to know whose tags she was wearing, and he could feel his own heart race. He could make out his own name, but he also noticed Bucky's name, and it was like that that it all dawned on him. He felt his heart drop. She blamed herself for his death.

"Smells like you. Old Spice, green hills, apple pie, and justice."

Steve held her tighter, realizing what this was all about. Even if it was quite a number of years ago for him, he remembered everything that she said when she had learned Bucky had died. He remembered how she called herself a horrible, shitty friend, and now, he realized why. "Toni."

"Not the best pillow though." He could feel her shiver as she spoke. "You need some fat on your bones."

"I don't think I ever had any fat on my bones," he said, as he lifted his head to get a good look on her face. "Even before the serum, I was all skin and bones." He remembered those times as being a punching bag to everyone around them. He remembered the looks and cruel treatment he got from everyone including Bucky, but never from her. Toni never treated him differently, though she at times expected more.

She closed her eyes and held on to him. "I remember. You were my shrimp."

"Yes, yours," he said, remembering her calling him that. At the time, he didn't much care for it, but he didn't mind it now; in fact, even though he would never admit it to her, he enjoyed it when she called him it, especially with the word 'my.' He wanted to be her everything.

Toni sighed deeply as she started to struggle in his arms again. "Let go," she uttered, unable to break his grip.

"Toni," he called, as he felt his heart breaking. Why did she keep doing this?

"Let go," she repeated, strongly.

With a heavy heart, Steve released her and allowed her to slip out of his arms. He kept his eyes on her, unsure of what to do or say. Did he let her run again? He wasn't sure he could handle that, granted he doubted Natasha would let her get to far from them. "Toni, talk to me."

The letter and journal in her hand dropped to the ground as she scooted away from the Captain. Her breathing became heavy as she leaned over, her head almost touching the ground. It looked like she was in some physical pain. "Stupid," she uttered. "So stupid."

Hesitating, Steve leaned over and placed a supportive hand on her back. "Talk to me. Tell me what's going on."

"You're too perfect."

He flinched back, flashing back to their fight in the lab. She had used that word as an insult, and it hurt to hear her call him that now. Was she insulting him again? Yes, he said he wouldn't give up, but he didn't know if he could take _that_ word. "Toni," he said, not moving.

Toni opened her eyes and looked up to him. Their eyes met, and he could see that this was anything but an insult. "I insulted you and was cruel beyond belief to you. In fact, I made it my goal to anger you, to frustrate you, just to see your temper. I want to bring you down to my level, but nothing. Sure, we yelled, and our fights are epic. Just ask everyone, but you never take it personal, always being the bigger person."

She turned from him, staring down at her hands. "I hated you for that," she said, after a few deep breaths. "I hated you for being so damn perfect, and I hated that my father cared more for your legacy then his own daughter. When I was a child, it was all about the great Captain America, and I hated that. I hated you. I hated that I couldn't get my father's attention like a dead icon could. For that, I wanted to tear you down just to do it. I wanted to anger you, to bring you down to my level. I wanted you to feel what I felt."

Feeling his own heart race, Steve didn't know what Toni was trying to get at, but he remained quiet, waiting for her to finish. He knew she needed to get it out, even if it broke him to hear it. This was all about her father. How could Howard do this to her? He wanted to slug him for that.

"…But…" She started, closing her eyes. A few second passed by before she took a few deep breaths and continued. "…After everything that I had said and done, you're still here. Still willing to be here for me, and I don't know why. Why would you come back after everything? Why?"

"Because I love you."

"But why?! After everything? After…Bucky?" she asked, tearing up. "I let your best friend die, when I could've stop it all, but I didn't. So how can you say that? How can anyone say that isn't my fault?"

Steve smiled softly at her as he wrapped his arm around her and pulled her back to him. She didn't fight him again and allowed herself to pull into his arms. "If we're playing the blame game, I beat you. You were unconscious, laying in a hospital bed. How could you do anything?" he asked. "I was the one that was there, that could've stop it. I was the one he was trying to protect."

"I could've told him sooner."

"I think that would have been worse." It really would have. Steve wouldn't wish that curse on anyone. He couldn't imagine the damage that would do on a person's psyche.

Toni shifted slightly, reaching for the letter on the ground. She brought it to her chest before she leaned back into Steve's chest. "If it isn't my fault, it isn't your fault either," she said finally after a few long minutes.

Steve let out a playful sigh. "Only if you listen." He replied. "You know we should listen to people, when they tell us things."

She snorted. "Like that's ever going to happen. You don't know me very well, Rogers."

"Why do I even try?" he asked, placing a kiss to her temple. He could feel her shiver as he kissed her, but he didn't let that stop him. If she didn't pull away from him, then he took it as a good sign.

"Yea, why do you?" she asked.

"Because you're perfect." She didn't respond, didn't even move. "You are."

She snorted again. "Well, according to me I am, but I don't think anyone else will agree."

"I do."

Toni chuckled before letting out a sigh. "You're feeding my ego, you know."

"Good," he replied, as that was definitely what he wanted to do. She needed a boast, and he would gladly give it to her. He would gladly do anything for her.

She took a deep breath before she spoke, "My father wouldn't let me blame myself either, even though he knew his death was coming." The Letter was shaking in her hands.

He knew? Was that why he was so cold to her? Howard Stark was a subject that Toni rarely approached, and she never really brought it up with him. Never. It was only ever in passing, and she would run-though she wouldn't use that word- when he brought it up. "Toni."

"He's an idiot you know. He refused to listen and just let himself to die, not listening to my warning. How dare he do that to me?" she asked, not expecting an answer. "After everything, after hating him for years, I really started to like him, _really_ like him and then he had to die on me. How could he leave me again?" Tears had started to run down her face. "How could he die after I started to love him? How could he?"

Steve held her tighter. "Toni, it wasn't by choice," he said, recalling what Dum Dum had told him back in the nursing home. After the time traveling, Howard had been a proud father, which he could tell from Dugan's many stories.

"He could have stayed. He could have."

She glanced down at the letter before she handed it to Steve. He looked at for a second before he read it. It was a long lengthy letter, and he was shaking by the end of it. His first thought was to laugh at Howard's disapproval of him, his distrust of his innocence. He kind of wanted to know what Howard would do, if he saw them now. However, he pushed that thought away as he stared down at the woman in his arms. She needed him now.

"Toni." He called, feeling the emotions in the letter. He could only guess to what she was feeling. He would only guess at what Howard was feeling when he wrote this, but he wasn't going to let her go. He was going to show her it wasn't her fault.

"I can't believe I rushed him off that phone call. How could I? I was so stupid. So cold." She buried her face in his chest, trying to hide from the world.

"We all have done things we regret," he said, placing another kiss to her head. "Hindsight is twenty, twenty."

"I just wished that I…" Toni drifted off as she closed her eyes. She was quiet for an ungodly amount of time, and she was so stiff in his arms. "And you love this hot mess?"

There was no doubt in his voice as he spoke, "Yes."

After a deep sigh, Toni added: "Fine, Spangles, I'm wearing your dog tags and I have no interest in taking them off."

 _Ah, the nicknames_ , Steve thought, fondly. He bent down and looked at her. "Yes, I am aware," he said, loving the fact she was wearing them and had no interest taking them off. "But it's good that you admit it though." There was a wink in his eyes as he teased her.

Toni pushed out of his arms slightly and stared at him. For a few long seconds, the two were silent as they looked into the other eyes. "Okay, let's do this."

He felt his heart skip. "Do what?" Was she saying what he thought she was saying?

"But I have conditions. I'm going to need you to tell me how awesome I'm on a daily bases and that I'm right all of the time," she replied with a smile.

His hand travel to her cheek, cupping it. His finger caressed her skin, so lightly it tickled. "Won't be an issue, though it might be difficult for the second one." There was nothing he would rather do.

She looked down for a second before looking back up. "You'll have to deal with my mood swings, and…negativity," she added, slowly. He could sense her hesitation as she spoke. He could hear the tones in her voice change.

Leaning closer, his lips were inches from her, and it took all he had not to kiss her right then. "That doesn't scare me," he said. "There's nothing you can do to scare me away, and I'll be positive for the both of us."

"You know that sounds like a challenge," she said with a smile.

"A challenge you will lose," he said, wondering if he would regret that. Toni had done some scary things in battle, almost giving him heart attacks. He could imagine the old man jokes if anyone knew.

Toni laughed with a smile. "You're perfect."

Steve smiled because it wasn't an insult this time. It something so much more. "No, I'm not, but that won't stop me from trying for you."

"Geez, Rogers, just kiss me already. I'm dying over here." She was beaming now as she spoke. "This is what I get for falling for an old man."

"I am anything but old," he countered. Yes, he was over 90, but he wasn't sure if he considered himself a 90 year old. He had a body of a 25 year old, and he wanted to use it.

The Genius laughed. "Oh, so are you saying you're not so _innocent_ , or do I get corrupt your innocence. If so, you won't know what hit you."

He could help the blush that was forming on his face. "What do you think?" he asked, closing the distance between them. Toni wrapped arms around his neck, pulling herself flat against him. Her lips felt salty, mostly from her tears, but she still tasted sweet. He knew he would never get enough.

Toni broke from the kiss first, but she didn't go far as she was smiling against his lips. "I can get use to this."

As Steve helped her to her feet, he held her close, not letting her out of his arms. "You better as I'm never letting go," he said, holding her. She leaned in and gave him another kiss, but this one was heavier than before. Steve's hands traveled to her lower back, pressing her against him. His fingers brushes against her soft skin; however, before anything it could get any heavier, they were interrupted with a loud thud.

"What the hell?" Toni asked, annoyed, as she pushed out of Steve's arms. "Can't a girl get some action?" Her eye was twitching as she eyed the scene in from of her. "Who…" The words died in her throated as she eyed the guy on the ground with a camera around his neck. She folded her arms crossed her chest and left out a puff. "Really? Here? I swear these guys are like mosquitos."

Steve let out a sigh from next to her as he eyed Romanoff manhandling the reporter. "You'll be deleting those photos," the assassin ordered. "Deleting them, now!"

"Natasha," Steve said, giving her a look. Though he knew she wouldn't kill the reporter, he was slightly worried at what she might do to him. She had that protected look in her eyes.

Romanoff gave him a look before turning back to the report. "Now!"

The Reporter gave her smile as he scooted away. "It's freedom of the press," he said. "Think about the attention these photos will get."

Toni let out a sigh as she face-palmed. "Romanoff, let him go. The legal hassle isn't worth it," she said. "I so don't want to deal with an angry Pepper. She'll pitch a fit if she heard we manhandled a reporter." Romanoff turned and gave her a look, but she didn't say anything. "Besides, this isn't as bad as the naked pictures of me that the media got once."

Steve turned to her, completely shocked. "What?"

"Yes, Rogers, you can google them if you want," she said with a wink.

He tried to fight the images of her naked out of his mind, but it was failing. He also couldn't keep the blush from his cheeks either. He really was screwed, wasn't he?

"You're impossible, Stark," Romanoff said, with a sigh, as she turned back to the reporter, who had taken that moment to dash away. Either of them could've stopped the man, but no one chased after him, knowing it was best to let him go. "You know that photo of Rogers and you kissing is going to be on the six o'clock news."

Toni shrugged. "It could be worse," she replied. "Granted, have you seen what I am wearing?"

Natasha sighed again. "Impossible," she repeated, stepping to the genius. She placed a hand on Toni's shoulder and squeezed. "But it's good to have you back. Don't do that to us again."

Toni smiled. "Oh, I knew you love me, Tashie."

Romanoff's eye twitched. "Don't call me that."

"Oh, you're no fun," Toni teased, shaking off the assassin's hand.

Chuckling, Steve stepped to Toni and softly pulled her into his arms. He enjoyed the feeling of having in her arms, knowing she was his. With a great smile, he placed the kissed to her head. "Let's get you back to the Tower."

Natasha shook her head as she watched the two. "You two are going to make me sick," she replied as she headed toward the gate.

Toni snickered as she leaned against the Captain. "Success."

Steve stared down at the genius, who was leaning heavily on him. He could practically feel her exhaustion, but he could also feel how happy she was now compare to before. It brought a bigger smile to his face, because she wasn't fight anymore. She was going to let this happen. She was going to let this grow. Yes, he knew they had lot to work on, her nightmares being one of them, but she wasn't going through this alone. He was going to be there. She was going to let him be here.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it. Toni finally let Steve in, though it seems like Pepper want to take Toni away. 
> 
> Let me know throw reviews. I love reviews.
> 
> Also, I was wonder who might be watching that 6 O'Clock news to see that kiss. ;p Same person who has that missing picture?


	34. The Choice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I am sorry it took me so long to get this, but the next Chapter turned into a Monster. Over 14,000 words beast. So I split it in half. haha. You will get the second half once my Beta gets it back. So you will get two chapters in a short time!
> 
> Same Copy right apply. Do not own Marvel. Don't sue me.
> 
> Also, A reviewer once asked me what Actress I would see playing Toni, and I could only think of two possible people. I was thinking either Rachel Emily Nichols or Roxanne McKee, but I don't know.
> 
> haha, what do you think?

**Chapter 34:**

**The Choice**

* * *

Toni was practically falling asleep in the car as Steve drove the Audi back to the tower. It was a battle in and of itself to allow Steve to drive her finely tuned vehicle back, but after stumbling a few steps, she knew he was right. She was too exhausted to drive or pilot-even with JARVIS as her co-pilot. "So you ran the whole way to the cemetery?" she asked tiredly.

"I needed some air, and running clears my head," he said, looking forward. He had a goofy smile on his face that could make anyone smile, including Toni.

"Yeah, probably because you don't have a driver's license, old man," she said with a small smile - all she could muster in her exhausted state.

Steve chuckled. "I have a license."

Toni leaned back in the passenger seat, feeling the warmth from Steve's hand on her knee. She wasn't sure when Steve had placed her hand on her knee, but she enjoyed the feeling. "What, from the 1940's?" she asked.

"Does it matter? Do you really think they're going to give Captain American a ticket?" he asked, as they pulled into Avenger's Tower.

It felt strange to be here, even if this place was her home. It was also weird to see all of the bright colors and moving signs after being trapped in the 40's for so long. It was bizarre to see how differently people dressed and acted. Granted, she grew up and created the technology around them, it was strange to be around it again after being stuck in the past for so long, but it felt nice being back, even if she felt out of place. "Oh, you're pulling that card?" she asked, laughing hard. "Never thought you would do that, _Captain_."

"I wouldn't," he replied, pulling into a parting spot. He had such a big smile on his face that Toni couldn't pull her eyes away from.

Toni turned to him, still laughing. "Oh, Old Man! I didn't know you had it in you!"

Was this how Steve felt when he awoke in the future? Did he feel out of place? Feel weird in his own skin — clammy hands, shaky nerves, dry throat? Did he still feel out of place? Sure, she felt weird after being in the past, but she belonged here. She would be her regular self in no time, but what about Steve? Did he feel at home here? Was this torture to him like the past had been for her? Did she make a mistake by not telling her father? Maybe, he would've been happy there — if she had told them all everything from the beginning. He would've been happy with his best friend still alive, Bucky; he would've been happy with a woman like Peggy by his side. He would have been brilliant, could have been, should have been.

Steve's smile turned into a smirk as he reached over to Toni, cupping her soft face in his rough hand. "Oh, you think of me of an old man, really?" he asked, holding her in place as he covered her lips with his. It was a simple kiss, but Toni just melted into him. His hand dropped to her neck, gently pulling her closer.

After a few seconds, Toni broke the kiss and pulled back slightly. His kiss was able to wipe her mind completely, and she couldn't help the smile that formed on her face, never thinking that Rogers would be this touchy. Seriously, who would've thought? "Geez, Rogers. Never knew you had it."

He gave her a look before closing the distance again, but just as he placed his lips on hers, there was a loud, rapid knock on the car window. Steve let out a heavy groan as he broke away from Toni. "Natasha," he breathed out, noticing the master assassin.

If Natasha was uncomfortable at the scene in front of her, she didn't show it, though she wasn't exactly looking at them. Standing sideways, she was staring at the elevator with an intense look. "Stop making out and get your asses upstairs before they kill each other."

Toni let out a sigh as she sat back in her seat. "Geez, Romanoff, did anyone teach you how you shouldn't interrupt a make out session?" she asked, putting on a goofy smile. She didn't want to think about the 'party' that awaited her upstairs, knowing it wasn't going to be any kind of fun. Plus, she wasn't emotionally ready for that conversion. She was still struggling with her guilt. "Kill each other?"

"Yes, kill." Natasha's eye twitched as she stepped away from the car. "Oh, God forbids, I do that."

"Oh, yes! A crime against nature," Toni cried, as she reached for the door handle. Without wasting a second, she pushed the door open and chased after Romanoff. "A crime, I tell you."

Steve was smiling, as he pocked the keys and got out of the white Audi to follow after them. His eyes were on Toni, watching the Genius' every step as if she was the most important thing in the world to him. "Easy, Toni," he replied, stepping on to the elevator. He was truly smiling.

If that smile was anything to judge, maybe he was happy? She hoped so. Toni gave him a look before leaning against the left side of the elevator. "Oh, you don't know what you have gotten yourself into, Rogers."

Natasha chuckled as she shook her head. "I need some popcorn for this," she said, standing at the back.

"Don't worry. I can handle you," he smiled, leaning against the other side. His eyes were on her, never leaving her.

"Oh, you think?" Toni shook her head, as she left out a chucking sigh. "JARVIS," she called out.

The AI answered immediately. "It is nice to see you again, Miss Stark. It is good to have you back."

"Mommy didn't go far," Toni answered. She sighed, knowing she better get this reunion over with because the longer she waited the worst it would be. "Take me to my subjects."

"As you wish, and I must say that would be wise. Tensions are on the rise. Colonel Rhodes and Agent Baron are seconds away from a fist fight, Miss." JARVIS replied.

Natasha straightened herself up as she glared. "Seriously?" she asked, angrily. "Child."

Toni could feel her heart race as she didn't know if she could handle this right now, not now. Granted she knew Steve and her father were right about her guilt; it was still a struggle, a struggle not to hate herself. And with her emotions all over the map, she wasn't sure that she could deal with people, not a crowd of them anyhow. "So this is what happens when I leave? Geez, People. Geez."

Steve's hand twitched at his side as he eyed Toni. "Let's get a move on, then," he said.

Toni sighed as she nodded. "JARVIS."

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Toni's heart was still racing when the elevator reached the penthouse level, and it took everything she had to step out into the hall. She could see the door to the lounge, and she could hear Rhodey's raised voice, but she couldn't find it in her to move. Hearing them fight over her did nothing to calm her nerves.

Natasha walked past the stilled Toni, giving Steve a look. The Captain had yet to move as he eyed Toni. "I'm going to go in before they kill each other." Without waiting for a response, she disappeared into the room. The genius could hear the room silenced at the sight of Romanoff, and Toni had to give it to her; Romanoff could control a room with ease. It just took a single look to do it.

Toni closed her eyes, no longer able to hear any more yelling; however, she knew it wasn't going to last once she entered the room. She wasn't sure what her reception will be, considering everything that had happened. One being: she had ejected Rhodes from the Suit. She was regretted it now. Her best friend, her oldest friend, could've been killed because she was being childish. She was being stupid and put him in danger for no reason. He could be injured, and it could be her fault. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Why had she been so stupid?

"Toni," Steve called as he stepped to her. His arms were wide as he reached for her.

Before he could reach and pull her into his arms, Toni stepped out of his reach, though regretting it a second later. She could see the hurt look in his eyes as his hand hovered near her, and it only made her feel worse. "Sorry."

"I can see the gears in your head spinning," he replied, remaining close to her. "Talk to me."

For a few seconds, she just stared at him. She studied the mixture of emotions on his face, and each was something she didn't know how to handle. "Just thinking," she said with a deep breath. "You know me."

"Yeah, I do," he said, stepping forward, so close that he could wrap his arms around her. "Are you okay?" His arms were twitching at his side, as he itched to hold her.

"I…" she started with a deep sigh, as she turned to the door. "I don't know if I can answer handle questions right now." It wasn't a complete lie, because she wasn't really yet to talk about what happened. It was all so raw in her head. "Not all at once. I don't know if I can answer them." She didn't know if she wanted to answer them.

Steve took a deep breath as he gave in and finally pulled her into his arms. "I won't let them do that," he said into her hair line, as he held her close. "I won't."

"You promise?" she asked, softly.

"Yes," he said. "I will be your shield."

Toni chuckled into his chest. "You have been dying to say that, haven't you?" she asked.

A slight pink shade formed on his cheeks. "Maybe," he said, slowly. "But it's true."

"Okay, Cowboy, lets head in before they're anymore antsy," she said, laughing at him. She pulled out of his arms completely as she turned to the door.

Steve laughed. "Okay, my damsel."

Toni's eye twitched as she turned back to him. Ignoring the fact that he had lifted her spirits in the matter of seconds, she was glaring at him. "Don't you dare!" she said, turning back to him.

The Super Soldier was now smiling at her. "Well, if the slipper fits."

"Don't make me kick your ass," she said, stomping back to him. "You know I can!" She may have glaring at him, but it was fading, as she stared down Steve's smile. Her left eye was twitching as she ogled his prefect smile with his prefect teeth. "Goddamn it," she cursed. "That smile should be illegal!"

Steve's smile grew as he closed the distance between them. He softly cupped her face as he kissed her. It was a soft, quick, but it was filled with love. "Oh, you love it."

"Shut it," she said, against his lips.

He leaned his forehead against her, still cupping her cheeks. "I mean it, Toni. I'm here for you through everything."

That scared the genius. It really did. She never had someone like Steve, who was willing to do anything for her. What if she screwed this? No, she would screw this up, because that was who she was. "Let's go before they break through the door."

Steve's hand dropped from face to her arm. "We wouldn't want that."

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

With a deep breath, Toni followed Steve into the lounge, fighting the urge to reach out and grab his hand. It was difficult to focus on anything but his hand, his strong hand. She wanted to place her hand into his and hold on tight. She wanted to feel his strength as he held her. He was her rock, keeping her calm, and even with her overwhelming guilt, he was keeping her sane.

Toni stepped to the right of the Super Soldier, glancing around the room. Dugan, Jones, and Trip were sitting on one of sofa, and not too far from them was Bruce. They were deep in conversion about something, but their voices were too soft to make out. Every once and awhile, they would glance over to the bar, eyeing the group there. In the corner by the bar, Romanoff had separated Rhodes and Barton by stepping in between them. She was giving each a deadly look that only a fool would cross.

However, it was Pepper who caught Toni's eye as it looked like she hadn't slept in days. It could be the way the light hit her, but the CEO looked tired as she spoke with Romanoff, granted everyone looked exhausted. They all looked like they were on edge, like no one had been sleeping. Was this all because of her?

Steve put on his Captain's face as he took a step forward. There was a change in his stance and posture as he put himself between the room and Toni. "Guys," he called.

Toni could feel his voice cut through the tension in the room, as everyone shifted their attention to Steve. It was only a second later before they noticed Toni standing behind him. Her shoulders stiffened with every eyes on her. "Hey, guys. You miss me?" she asked with a smile.

"Toni!" Pepper uttered as she made her away toward the Genius.

Rhodey wasn't far behind as he rushed across the room. "Tones."

Steve gave them each a harsh look as he blocked their path to the time traveler. "Not all at once," he said in his cold Captain's voice. "Give her some space."

Pepper gave him a glare of her own. "Move," she said in a calm, demanding voice.

The Captain glanced down at her before scanning the room. Clint had taken several steps forward but he stopped halfway through the room. Natasha hadn't move from the corner of the room; however, Bruce was on his feet, but he hadn't moved either. The Commandos were still on the couch, eyeing the scene in front of them. "Stand back," he said.

Reaching for Steve, Toni stepped forward and placed a hand on his biceps as if to tell him to stand down. If it was just Rhodes and Pepper, she could handle them. "It's fine, Steve."

Steve turned to Toni, eyeing her, before he stepped aside to let Pepper and Rhodes by. In a matter of seconds, Toni was in Pepper's embrace. "Toni," she said, crying lightly.

"Pep," she called, wrapping her arms around the CEO. "It's fine. I'm back."

Pepper pulled back slightly but kept Toni in her reach. "Don't ever do that to me again!" she yelled.

Before Toni could respond, Rhodes ripped her out of Pepper's embrace into his own. "Rhodes, can't breathe," she muttered in his chest. His grip on was tighter and stronger than Pepper, and there was no way she could break from it.

"Rhodes," Steve called. There was a soft warning in his voice, but it was firm. "Easy."

The Colonel, not letting go of the Genius, glanced up to Rogers. "I got it, Rogers." His voice was anything but friendly.

They glared at each for a few seconds before Toni struggled in Rhodes' arms, sensing the rising tempers. "Still need to breathe, guys!"

Looking away from the Captain, Rhodes glanced down at the genius in his arms and his expression soften at the sight of her. He loosened his hold on her but kept her close. "Sorry, Tones, but I've been so worried," he said, tenderly. "Though, I have a bone to pick with you. You revoked my access to the Mark 7, while in combat, Toni."

"Oh, that," she said, putting on an innocent smile. "Well, don't take my stuff." Yes, she regretted it, but she wasn't going to tell him that. That one of the lessons that her father taught her: never admit when you're wrong.

"Can't be mad at you," Rhodes muttered as he pulled her back into his arms.

"Oh, I can," Pepper said, pulling the Genius from Rhodes' arms and back into her arms.

Toni glanced to Steve for help, and their eyes met, but Steve didn't make any movement. He just smiled at her like the traitor that he was. If they're dating, then it was requirement for him to come to her aid whenever she needed it, and she needed it now. "I t-think I'll be the f-first one to die from hugs," she said. Her voice muffled in Pepper's chest.

Pepper only hug her tighter. "Oh, you. Never do that again."

Unlike Steve, Clint took a step forward as Pepper started to rock back and forward on her heels. "Maybe, you should let the genius breathe? Her face is turning blue."

The CEO stilled, as her grip loosened on Toni. Spinning ever so slowly, Pepper gave Barton a cold, harsh look before she turned to Toni, leading her away. "I need to talk to Toni _alone_ ," she said.

Steve narrowed his eyes at Pepper before he turned to Rhodes, eyeing him. Those two were hovering close to the engineer, cutting her off from the rest of the room. "Miss Potts."

Bruce took a step to them. "Pepper," he called. "Let's all take a step back."

There was something in his voice that Toni couldn't place, but with Pepper's hand on her back trying to lead her away, she wasn't able to give it much thought. However, the tension in the room was hard to miss. "What's going on?" she demanded, looking between Pepper and the rest of the room.

"I need to talk to you _alone_ ," Pepper repeated. There was something in Pepper's voice that grabbed Toni.

Natasha remained silent as she took a step forward, but she was giving Steve a look, a telling look. It was if she was telling the Super Soldier to do something, but Steve didn't move. He just stared at Pepper as she led Toni to another room. His eyes were narrowed, calculating, but he didn't move. Bruce glanced around, standing perfectly still. There was a clear struggle on his face as he glanced between Rhodes and Pepper, but he didn't say anything either. However, Clint was anything but silent. "Why? So you can spout your bullshit? Too afraid to admit it in front of us?"

Toni's eyes widen at Clint's icy tone. What the hell was going on? "Um, did someone die?" she asked. "Did World War III happen when I was away?" she asked. "Did someone eat the last piece of cake? I know c-"

Rhodes placed a firm hand on her shoulder, drawing her attention. "Tones, let's talk for a second," he said, leading her in the same direction of Pepper.

"Is someone getting a divorce?" Toni asked, still trying to figure out what was happening. Seriously, it was a war zone going on in this room with the Avengers one side, and Pepper and Rhodes on the other.

Clint took a step forward. "Why don't you say what you want to say _here_? No need to talk behind closed doors. Why-"

Toni's head was spinning. Yes, she expected to be overwhelmed, but she didn't expect this. "Stop," she howled, feeling ill. Her head started to hurt.

At that, Steve finally moved with a look of pure protectiveness on his face that no one could deny. "Stop," he ordered in his Captain's voice. It was hard to ignore his firm, unforgiving voice as he spoke, giving no room to protest. "We can't be fighting each other." His eyes drilled into everyone, almost daring someone to say something.

Toni almost let out a sigh of relief as Steve took control, but with the angry Pepper beside her, she knew she had to deal with her now. It was only way to settle the CEO. "Pep," she said, turning to her. "You want to talk? Let's talk. Let's go Rhodes." She could see the rest of the room step forward at that, but she didn't let them interject as she left.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Before Rhodes or Pepper could say a word, Toni had disappeared into her private bathroom for a quick shower. She barely got her hair wet, only staying along enough to rise the dirt off, and once she got most of the dirt off, she got out. Not bothering to dry herself, she wrapped a towel around her and vanished into the closet, and it wasn't until ten minutes later that she came out in an oversized MIT sweat shirt and yoga pants. The sweatshirt's neck line hung low on one side, exposing the soft skin of her shoulder and the thin black strap of her bra. Her arms were drowning in the sleeves with her fingers barely poking out. It was almost like a dress on her, as it hanged just below her butt.

Still not saying a word, Toni scanned the room before flopping down on her soft, huge bed next to Rhodes, who had taken a seat at edge of the bed. Pepper was stiff and unmoving, as she stood in the center of the room. Her quietness could silence most people, and it was no different now. However, it was so much worse than before as Toni didn't know what brought this quietness on.

Did she shoot someone's puppy? Kill someone's pet? "So…" Toni started, feeling like she had did something wrong besides the usually. She rolled to her right side to look at Rhodes and Pepper.

Rhodes smiled slightly as he looked at her. "We're just worried about you."

Toni's eyebrow raised, because she knew it was more than that. "What's going on? What is it, Pep?" she asked, noticing Pepper's stiff shoulders. She pushed herself up slightly, to get a better view of her CEO.

"This has to stop," was Pepper's cold response.

At that, the Genius pushed herself up in a sitting position, as her eyes widen. "What are you talking about? Me time traveling?" she asked. "Because trust me, I have no interest in doing that again." The very thought of it made her uneasy. She could feel her skin start to crawl at the thought of it.

"You're going to get yourself killed at this rate!" Pepper yelled, still not moving. She looked too angry to move.

Toni really wasn't afraid of her death as much as Pepper was, but Toni wasn't going to mention that to Pepper. She wasn't going to mention her guilt either, because that would make it worst. "Pepper."

"I'm taking you back to Malibu. Right now!" Pepper replied, coldly, pointing to make her point. Without another word, she moved to the closet and pulled out a suitcase.

While Pepper moved from the closet to Toni's dresser, the genius eyed Pepper, her closest dearest friend, in shock. For once, she was speechless, unable to think of something to say. What could she say? She didn't want to start a fight with Pepper, not after everything. She couldn't lose another person in her life, not right now. Not so soon after Bucky and her father.

Rhodes looked at Toni for a few seconds, before getting to his feet. "Pepper," he called softly. "Slow down. Let's talk about this."

Pepper crossed back to the closet and pulled an article of clothing off the hanger. She folded it as she walked back to the suitcase on the ground. "There's nothing to talk about," she replied, quickly. "We're leaving now. Do hear me, Toni?"

Toni slapped back to reality at the sound of her own name. "No, I am only pretending to listen as I always do."

The CEO froze and turned to Toni ever so slowly. She was anything but happy. "This is not up for debate. You're coming with me."

As the words started to sink in, Toni started to shake in anger as she got to her feet. "Despite what everyone thinks, I am not a child, and I can make my own decisions. You are not my mother. You work for me, Pepper. Not the other way around."

"Guys, this is not the time," Rhodes said, putting a hand on Toni's shoulder. It was a firm grip that the angry, tired brunette couldn't break free of. "We just got her back. We don't need to fight now."

Pepper dropped a different item of clothing into the suitcase, before she stomped to Toni. "I'm done with this, Toni. Do you hear me? I'm done. I can't stand by and watch you kill yourself. My body cannot handle stress. Let the others continue this battle."

"I'm not going to let them risk their lives while I sit on the sidelines!" she replied. This was the same conversion that they always had. Pepper hated that Toni risked her life on a daily basis. Hated it.

The blond stepped toward Toni, her eyes drilling into her; however, when Pepper spoke, her voice was soft. "Please, Toni, come back with me. I can't take this. If anything happens to you, I don't think I could handle it. Do you know hard these past few weeks were for me? Hard. I thought I was never going to see you again, and I had to keep it all inside. No one to talk to because no one else could know you were gone." Tears started to form in her eyes. "I had no one."

Toni felt her anger drain from her body. "Pepper," she uttered.

"Please come back with me," Pepper responded.

Toni didn't know what to do or say, because it wasn't just her anymore. Her decisions affected more than her, it affected everyone; she had think about them, which she never had to think about before. Plus, there was someone else she had to think about, and that was Steve… She couldn't leave him, not after he had been there for her. "Pepper."

Pepper stepped to Toni and grabbed her hand, softly. "Please."

It was difficult to tell this woman no. "I can't…Not now."

There was sharp intake of air next to her, reminding them that Rhodes was in the room. He glanced between the two before he took a step forward. He could see Pepper's face morph into anger, and it scared most who came across her. "Pepper," he said.

The CEO gave him a nasty look before she turned to Toni. Her fists were balled at her side, and she was shaking. "Toni," she sneered out.

"Take a few deep breaths." Rhodey stated.

As if his advice was for her, Toni took a few deep breaths, racking her brain for the right thing to say. In these situations, she never knew what to say and always had the habit of saying the wrong thing. Steve could attest to that as could…Bucky. _Stop,_ she thought to herself.

"I'm done, Toni," Pepper yelled, still shaking. "You either come with or not, but I'm done. I can't handle the stress. I can't handle the lies. I can't handle any of this."

Toni breathed in sharply. This was nothing new, having heard this speech many times after becoming Iron Man. Before she hadn't been scared to hear it, but now, it scared her, as it sounded like she meant it this time. "This sounds…" Toni asked, drifting off.

Rhodes closed his eyes before reaching for Toni, resting a hand on her shoulder. He squeezed her shoulders softly as he glanced toward Pepper. "Let's drop this. We don't want to say something we will regret."

"Too late," Toni uttered, shaking off her best friend. "If she wants to leave, let her leave." She hated when people made her chose. "I don't need her."

"Toni," Rhodes yelled. "You don-"

Pepper raised her hand, stopping him. "Enough, James," she said. "I get it. She made her choice."

It was correct. Toni had made her choice, and she would be sticking with it, even if she wasn't hundred percent sure. "I wouldn't say it was me, who made it, Pepper. It was you. You made the choice. Don't put this on me."

The CEO gave her a look before she made her way to the door. "If you excuse me, I have a company to run," she said.

 _My company_ , Toni thought angrily.

Toni didn't move as Pepper walked past her and to the door. Holding as still as she could, she stared at the wall with her hands balled at her side. There were so many things going through Toni's head that she was afraid of what she would say if she opened her mouth. She was filled with both angry and grief at the thought of Pepper leaving her.

The Colonel's eyes lingered on Toni for a few seconds before he followed a few feet after the angry CEO. "Pepper, stop." He glanced back to the Genius. "Look, we've been stressful time. Let's not do this. Let's not walk away angry. We can't fight. Not the three of us. We have been through too much for this."

Pepper stood still but she didn't turn back. "I'm not doing this because I want to. I'm doing this, because I have to. I'm doing this because Toni is important to me. She will always be important to me and I would do anything to make her happy; however, I have to think about myself. I have to, or all I am going to have is regret and hatred."

Toni closed her eyes, knowing it wasn't fair to Pepper. She knew it all along, but she didn't care. She kept being selfish, asking the impossible from her; she knew it was unfair to Pepper, forcing her to do things by using their friendship. She thought she would always be there, no matter what. "I know," she said, softly. "And I'm sorry, but I can't leave."

Surprised, Pepper spun around quickly, stepping back to Toni. "Toni," she called, as the tension died in her shoulders. In a few long steps, Pepper pulled Toni into her arms and hugged her tight. "I love you, and even if I can't be there next to you, I will always love you. Always."

Toni hugged her back. "I know," she replied. "And I am sorry." They remained in each other's arms for quite a while, not moving, as they each knew what was about to happen.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

There wasn't a lot of things that Steve hated, but he hated this. He absolutely hated this, and it took all he had not to follow Toni as she talked with Potts and Rhodes. He knew why Pepper wanted to speak to Toni alone, and though they weren't specifically trying to take Toni from _him_ , they were trying to take her from them, the Avengers. _From him._

"I'm surprised there isn't a hole in that door yet," Clint said, taking a slip.

After Toni had disappeared behind that door, Dum Dum and Gabe had taken their leave, though Steve would've loved to have spent more time with them. He would've loved to have heard stories about their lives after the war, but it was time for them to leave. It was starting to get awkward with Clint, Bruce, and Natasha hovering over their shoulders, and this situation with Pepper only made it worse.

Plus, Gabe said his daughter was probably going to call the search team if he didn't return soon, which Trip laughed at in agreement. Dum Dum also mentioned that Nancy was probably worrying and fretting about him not being back yet, which Steve eyed in confusion. It took him a few seconds to remember that this was the Nurse, who Dugan fancied and followed around like a lost puppy in the nursing home. It made Steve laugh as he wondered how that Nurse put up with Dugan. Serious, this woman must be a saint or something.

Natasha's eyebrow rose as she eyed the still Captain. "How long do you think it'll be before he storms the castle for Stark?" she asked.

Maybe after all of this was over, Toni and he could visit Dugan and Jones. Just the two of them without anyone else. It would nice with just the two of them, as she would understand. She would understand what he went through. She would understand what these men meant to him, without him having to explain it. It felt amazing not to have to explain it, because she was _there._ It felt amazing that she understood.

Bruce, sitting in front of the fire place, eyed the Captain as well. "Did something happen?" he asked, seeing a change in him.

Natasha smiled as she brought her glass to her lips. She said nothing as she took a long slip. Clint gave her a look before eyeing the Captain. "You have to tell us now!" he replied, loudly and annoyed.

Laughing, Bruce asked, "Oh, really? Did they now?"

Clint's eyes snapped to Bruce, trying to read his face. "Really what? Come on! Someone has to tell me what happened?" he asked with a pouty face. "It's not fair you two have this silent communication going on! Nat!"

Snapping back to reality, Steve suddenly turned from the door and faced this three teammates. "What are you three talking about?" he asked, having not paid any attention to them.

Bruce chuckled, while Natasha just shook her head. Clint let out an annoyed huff as he eyed the Captain. "You, Cap," Clint replied. "But I guess we all know what your mind is on…or rather who is on your mind."

Steve could feel the color form in his cheeks as everyone knew about his feelings for the Brunette. Everyone knew how _hard_ he had fallen for Toni. "We've other things to worry about," he replied, choosing not respond to Clint's jest. "We still need to figure out if this is related to the items stolen from Blackhawk."

"Oh, it seems like we have our Captain back. Oh, Captain. Oh, Captain," Clint said, smiling.

Natasha also had a grin on her face as she shook her head. "We need to alert Fury to Toni's reappearance," she replied, putting on a serious face.

Steve had to hold back his glare at the sound of Fury's name. He didn't want to alert Fury just let, because he wanted to talk to Toni first. He wanted to give her time to adjust to being back. "Let wait a few more hours before we do that." He replied.

"You know he won't like that," Romanoff said, morphing into agent mood.

"I know, but-" Steve didn't finish as the door that Toni disappeared through opened, silencing the room. He eyed the door, waiting for someone to walk through. He sucked in his breath and held it as he waited perfectly still. Toni was always able to do this to him, even when she wasn't try to, and this time was no different.

"There will be no calling the Pirate!" Toni said, stepping through the door with a smile on her face. "This is a pirate free Zone. Besides it takes too long to debug the Tower after his visits."

"Toni," Steve uttered, automatically taking a step to her. He scanned her over, looking for some kind of clue to what had happen between Pepper and her. However, he didn't notice anything but the change of clothes. She was dressed in an old, worn-out, oversized MIT sweat shirt that was a dress on her. She looked so small in it that he wondered if it was ready hers; however, even in the old, discolored item, Steve still found her attractive.

Natasha rolled her eyes. "We need contact Director Fury."

Clint stepped past Steve, not waiting for a respond. "Where's Potts?" he asked.

Toni waved him off. "She has a company to run, Bird Brain. She can't stay here forever."

"And the Colonel?" Clint asked, giving her a look. It was clear that he was not a fan of the nickname.

"He'll be back. Just taking Pepper to the airport," Toni replied, stepping to Clint. "I'm not looking forward to that lecture, but they can't be as bad as Rogers'." She said with a smile as she grabbed Barton by the shoulder.

Steve felt his eye twitch as even now she throwing shots at him; however, this was one of the reasons why she was Toni. One of the reasons why he loved her. "Hey, my lectures are well deserved."

"I don't-" Toni was unable to finish as Clint yanked her into his arms. "If you ever do that again, I'll put an arrow in you," he said.

Toni chuckled as she pushed against his chest. "Note to self: Stop making arrows for Barton."

"NO!" The Agent replied in a playful note. "I need my pretties!"

Bruce got to his feet and stepped toward them. "You better give them to him, Toni, or else we might find something in the air ducks. It probably won't be pretty."

Waving him off, Toni let out a sigh. "Okay."

Natasha put on her glass down and stepped to them as well. "Does this mean you aren't going to Malibu?"

"What? You knew about that?" she asked, stepping to Steve. Standing a mere feet from the Super soldier, her hand closest to him twitched at her side.

"Clint guessed it," Bruce replied, eyeing how close Toni had stepped to Steve.

Toni snorted as she folded her arms across her chest. "A warning would've been nice. What kind of team members are you?" she asked, pretending to be hurt. "Can't trust anyone, can I?" There was playfulness in her tone that wasn't here when they got off the elevator.

"Are you okay?" Bruce asked, worried.

"I am p-" She started, but the words died. "What the hell is he doing here? I thought I said no Pirates!" she yelled, stepping away from Steve and toward the windows. Her eyes were on the helipad, glaring at the black helicopter that was landing. There was no mistaking the Shield symbol blazed on the side of it.

Clint followed her to the window and peered out. "He's the leader of the top Spy Organization. I would be surprised if he hadn't found the President's Book of Secrets yet."

Toni narrowed her eyes at him. "You watched National Treasure, didn't you? Is that what you did when I was gone? If so, you need a life!" she said, looking back to the helicopter tapping down. "You're supposed to party when mom's away."

"Yea, but Dad was still here," Clint chuckled.

Steve glanced toward Natasha, giving her a confused look. "Dad?" he asked.

Bruce laughed. "He means you."

For a few seconds, Steve was silent as he gawked. "What?" His response only made Bruce and Natasha laugh harder.

Toni glanced back at Steve and smiled. With fondness in her eyes, she observed Steve before she turned back to Fury and Agent Hill, who had stepped out onto the pad. The rotors came to the stop as the Director and Agent made their way to pad's doors. A nameless shield agent sat at the pilot seat, while another climbed out and stood guard. "Seriously, who invited him?"

Before anyone could respond, Fury and Hill walked through the room. Their eyes went straight to Toni, and stayed on her. "I see you're in one piece, Stark."

"Yes, I am, Eye Patch," Toni replied, giving him a look.

Even when Steve and Toni were fighting, she had never looked at him like that, and Steve knew why. It didn't take a genius to know that she didn't like Fury. She didn't trust Fury, and Steve had to admit that he didn't trust or like Fury as well. "Director," Steve said, making his way over to Toni.

"How did you know I was here? I didn't take out a flyer," she replied. Her eyes shift to Steve for a second as he approached her.

Fury glanced between the Soldier and the Engineer. "Well you and Soldier Boy are on all the gossips sites, Stark. It's kind of hard to miss."

Clint's eyes brow. "Gossips sites?"

"Oh, they don't know?" Fury replied as if he had something smelly under his breath. He could out stink eye anyone.

Steve closed his eyes as he could feel the blush forming in his cheeks. He wasn't stupid, knowing exactly what Fury was referring to. Natasha had even said that picture of them kissing would be on the 6 O'clock news, granted he thought she was joking. Why would anyone want to see a picture of him and Toni kissing? Why would anyone care?

"Well, I'll show you," Fury said, taking control of the massive television wirelessly with a device in his pocket.

Toni's eye twitched as the screen flicked on. "JARVIS," she called. "I have to update your security that was way too easy for Fury."

"Yes, Miss. I have to agree," the AI replied as an image appeared on screen.

Steve turned to the TV, knowing what would be on the screen, but the image took him by surprise, and he couldn't help but stare. He couldn't help but smile either as he looked at it. Toni had her arms wrapped around his neck, while his hands were on her hips, holding her close. He realized he wanted a copy of that picture. He wanted multiple copies of it, and he wanted it everywhere.

Clint was trying not laugh and it was clear to everyone around, but after a few seconds, it busted out. He couldn't keep it in, and it turned into a laughing fit. "So… that's…what…you meant!" he chuckled at Romanoff and Banner. "Mommy and Daddy are together."

Toni glanced at the snickering man before turning to Fury. "Okay, so Rogers and I kissed, so what? It wasn't the make-out session that I wanted, but there's next time." She spun to Steve and winked. Again, her hands were twitching at her side, itching to reach for him.

Fury's look was anything but friendly as he glowered. "We don't have time for your kissy face, Stark. We need to discuss what happened."

Steve could see the expression morph on Toni's face, and he didn't like it. "This can wait, Fury," he said, reaching for her. He could see her flinch slightly as his hand made contact with hers, but she didn't pull away. "She needs to rest."

"Rogers," Hill started, stepping forward. "If we could wait, we would, but we need to find the items stolen from Black Hawk."

Fury's eyes narrowed. "Someone was stolen from me, and I want to find out who. I need to know who."

Steve stepped closer to Toni and put a protective arm around her. "We can do this later," he said, in his Captain's voice. It was a voice that very few disobeyed. Toni leaned into his touch, and Steve couldn't help but smile at that. However, it did nothing but drove his protectiveness. He knew Toni could handle herself, but he couldn't help it.

Natasha stepped forward as she morphed back into Agent Romanoff, Master Assassin. "Rogers," She said. "She's correct. We need to figure out if this is connected."

"And we can do this later," Steve sneered.

Toni let out a sigh as she patted Steve on the upper arm. "It's fine, Cap," she replied. She took a step away from him and toward Hill and Fury. "These two aren't anything I can't handle."

Barton was looking between Rogers and Stark, eyeing the physical contact between the two. Even without the physical contact, it was clear to all that there had been a change between the two, and that picture of them kissing sealed it. "I don't know if I can handle those two together," he said, whispering to Banner in a chuckle.

Bruce tried to hold back his smile as he eyed Fury and Hill. "At least, Steve won't be so gloomy."

Steve's could feel his eye twitch as he caught Clint and Bruce's Comment. He _was_ not gloomy. "Fury," he said, focusing on the Director. "Fine, but you're on a short leash."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End for now,
> 
> Don't worry you will get the second half of this chapter soon! haha.
> 
> And what do you think? Think Pepper and Toni will end on on good terms?
> 
> Anyhow, until next time!


	35. Chapter 35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all!
> 
> I was waiting for my Beta, but she was busy and you guys were bugging, so here you go. You guys just love to bug me, don't you?!
> 
> Granted, i might have gotten this out sooner if it wasn't for all of the stories popping up in my head. I have so many ideas that keep playing in my heads. If I don't get them out, they distract me! Which is why i probably have so many unfinished, non published stories on my computer. Writing just gets them out. Haha
> 
> Anyhow, here you go. Let me know what you think.
> 
> I love reviews. They are the food to my soul.

**Chapter 35:**

**Shovel and the Tool**

* * *

The brief didn't last long…well for Toni anyhow, who snuck out of the room during the fighting. It was easy for the recently returned genius to do so. Granted, it was all because of Steve, who was angry…well beyond angry. She had never seen the Soldier act like this, and she had to say that it was a scary thing to watch. The Avengers had all been sitting originally, when Fury and Hill started to debrief Toni, and Steve had remained close to the genius, until the subject of Loki was brought up. Once Toni told them about Loki's deal to send her back, Steve was anything but calm, and no matter what anyone said, he refused to calm down.

For a while, Toni had just stared at the Captain, studying his anger. She had watched him as he had towered over everyone. She did try to wave his worry off by say: "That prankster got nothing on me," but Steve wouldn't hear of it, even if Loki wasn't the person they should worry about. It was her Stalker that worried her, though she supposed she could relax. He was in the past, while she was in the future, and there was no way he could get her now…granted he was working with Loki... Okay…maybe, she should still be worried.

It was during this yelling match with every eye on Steve that Toni disappeared. She could lie and say that she couldn't handle the yelling, but that wasn't the case. Growing up a Stark, she had gotten use to yelling echoing the halls of wherever she was; the real reason was that there were so many things Toni didn't want to tell Fury. There were things that she wanted to keep to herself, things that she would rather forget. One, the knowledge that her Father knew of his death, because she couldn't deal with that. It just _hurt._ How did Howard dealt with hit, when it brought her to tears? Then there was…Barnes, and how she _let_ him die.

At first, Toni thought she was caught by Hill, as she stepped out, but the agent said nothing. She thought the Almighty Director would stop her, but he did not. Then she thought the deadly red head would've caught her or said _something_ , but the assassin did not. Seriously, she was surprised to all hell that no one notice the un-sneaky engineer leave, but Toni counted it as a blessing.

There were too many people in her tower, and she didn't know how to deal with everyone at once, especially now. She should've listened to Steve, but she thought she could handle it. She thought she could handle her emotions, but she was wrong, and it annoyed her. It annoyed her how weak she was. Really, she couldn't handle her own emotions? What kind of person was that? She was Iron Man for crying loud.

So that was how she ended up in her lab, which hadn't been repaired or touched since _the_ incident. There was still a perfectly shaped hole in the center of the room, which was what Toni's attention was glued on. The device did have a ten foot range, which was the size of the hold, but something didn't make sense. If she thought back to her painful arrival in the past, the ten foot range was a perfect sphere, taking everything above and below. The hole in front of her was evident to that.

Getting down on her stomach, Toni leaned over the edge of the hold, studying the cut edges. It was a straight, clean cut with no jigged edges. "What the hell?" she thought, running the finger over it. If this happened when she went to the past, shouldn't the same thing happen when she came back? Though she didn't recall much from her return, she didn't remember much debris…granted she wasn't sure if she could trust that. Was the S.T.R.I.K.E. team real?

Toni pulled back her finger and looked at it. Staring at the fine cut on her finger, she eyed the blood droplets forming. "I don't understand," she uttered. How could the device survived the first transport, but not the return? It wasn't that she didn't trust the aged Commandos, but it didn't make sense. The return trip should look like the departure, should it not? And the device should've been survived, shouldn't it? And if it did, where was it?

Shaking her head, the genius got to her feet and stepped to her desk. She ran her fingers over the touchscreen contract panel. "JARVIS," she called. "Get the suit ready."

"Yes, Miss."

She was going to fly the suit back and check out the camp for herself. She needed to see that her device was destroyed for herself before she would let herself rest. "Thanks, JARVIS." She slowly pushed herself up with a deep sigh.

"You know I think Rogers will freak if you disappear again, though I might want to see that."

Toni felt her eye twitch. "JARVIS," she whined. "You're not supposed to let people sneak up on me. You're slipping!"

If it was possible for JARVIS to laugh, Toni had no doubt that the AI would be laughing. "If seems like I am, Miss. A tune up might be needed."

Clint laughed, stepping deeper into the room. "Don't be too hard on JARVIS. I'm amazing," the Archer said with a huge smile. "I can sneak past anyone."

"Careful, Bird Brain. That's my trademark," Toni said, giving him a look before looking back to her bleeding finger.

He gave her a smile as he stepped around the hole toward her. "Are you okay, Stark?" he asked, glancing over her. "I don't think I ever saw you bolted so fast."

"I didn't bolt. I just tired of Eye Patch." Toni didn't bolted and she would deny until she was blue in the face. "Besides, I have something on my mind," she replied, giving him a look.

Clint was still in his Agent Barton mood, dressed in his Hawkeye gear minus the bow. He was covered head to toe in dirt and sweat. He looked totally exhausted, but he still sported a smile. "Which is?" he asked.

"Geez, Barton. I expect this from Rogers or Romanoff, not _you_ ," she wailed. "I thought you would be happy to see me!" She pretended to be hurt, playfully pouting. "Granted, I expected you to throw a party. I'm pretty sad you didn't."

The Archer let out a chuckle. "Oh, I tried, but Rogers wouldn't let me! He's a joy sucker. So gloomy."

"So are they still fighting upstairs?" she asked, changing the subject. Her tone changed slightly.

"Yes, they are." Came a respond from the door, startling the two. Both Clint and Toni quickly turned to the doorway to see had joined them. "Steve's not backing down, so I came to check on you," answered Bruce, who looked just as tired as they did.

There was no denying how important Bruce was to Toni, becoming one of her closest friends. "See, they would never notice I'm gone!" Toni said, stepping to her armor. Scratches still lined the suit, but other than that, the suit was in good shape; however, she still was going to tease Rhodey to no end, even if she regretted kicking him out of the suit.

Bruce gave her a look. "Steve will and he'll freak."

Clint chuckled, lightly. "That's what I said."

Okay, Toni knew they were right, but it was bugging her. There was no way that her device was destroyed on impact, granted she couldn't be 100%. She was using a different power source the last time, and there was no telling what that cube could do, but still. Something was off! She could feel it in her bones. "He'll be fine!" She replied, waving them off.

Stepping deeper into the lap, Bruce stopped at the hole. He gave it a meaningful look before he looked at Toni. "You know I found Steve at this spot once. You should've seen him. Granted I haven't know Steve long, I have never seen him so lost. Toni, he was _lost_ without you."

That wasn't what Toni wanted to hear, and it only scared her more. What if this didn't work out? What if she screwed this up? …Wait, who the hell was she kidding? She would mess it up. It was her after all. "Am I getting the shovel talk?" she asked. As she was a screw up and didn't do commitment, she never got the talk before. No one was stupid enough before Rogers to try a relationship to her. Serious, was Rogers stupid? "If so, you better make it good!"

"No, it isn't," Bruce replied with smile. "I'm going to give Steve the shovel talk, Toni."

Wait, what? That took her by surprise, even if Bruce and she were close. "I would like to see that."

"I think Hulk would like to give him one too," the fellow Scientist said. "The Other Guy is very fond of you."

Even now, that still surprised her. Who would've thought the Hulk would like anyone, especially her? "Well, look at me," she said, gesturing to her body in her oversize sweatshirt.

Clint laughed. "I would love to give Rogers the shovel talk," he said with an evil laugh. "However, you'll have to worry about Nat giving you the shovel talk, and for some reason, I think her talk will be scarier than the Hulk's."

Toni gave him a look, masking her growing worry. Maybe, letting this _thing_ grow with Steve was a bad thing, because _when_ this did ended- and it will-, it could or would divide the team, and she couldn't let that happen. Couldn't. "I have no doubt in that," she said. "And she'll hide my body where no one will find it."

"Yup," Hawkeye chuckled. "I wouldn't wish that on anyone."

"Oh, tell me how you really feel about me!" Toni playfully whined, as her worry started to eat her on the inside.

Clint let out a loud laugh and smiled. "Oh, shut you. You know we all love you."

Toni couldn't help but find this whole situation funny, because who would've thought that was possible. "And how would you not?" she replied. "I am awesome."

"Oh, how I missed you," Barton replied.

Bruce laughed. "We all did."

Toni smiled as she stepped to the Iron Man Suit. "So where is my welcome home party?" she asked, staring at the bright red armor. Her eyes followed the sharp lines, as her mind started to flip on her. Was she kidding herself? "So where is my party?" What was wrong with her? Why was she thinking this way? Why did she keep doing this to herself? Why was she so self-destructive? Did she do this to herself on purpose? Did she deserve this? Did she deserve anything?

"Toni," Bruce said. His tone was soft, as he noticed the change in her shoulders. "W-"

"You thinking too much."

Toni froze hearing a new voice enter the room. "Steve," she said, soft, as she turned toward the door. Her heart raced as she noticed Steve, _her_ Soldier, leaning against the horribly painted glass doors. She got lost in his eyes as he looked at her with such fondness that it shocked her.

"Stop thinking so much," Steve said, his eyes never leaving her. "You're overthinking. I can practically hear it."

"I am not," she said, softly.

Clint chuckled as he turned to the door. "I better leave you two idiots alone before I see something I don't want to see." When he stepped into the doorway, he paused and stared at the Super Soldier. "Don't you hurt her, Rogers," he threatened, his voice turning serious. "You'll find some arrows in some painful places, if you do. Painful _places_ if you know what I mean. You hear me? Painful places. Don't hurt her."

Toni's eyes widen as she turned to them, shocked. Yea, he said he would do it, but she never expected him to do it…right then…to Steve's face…while she watched, and the expression on Steve's face made it all worse. He didn't look scare, not even in the slightest. There was a big smile on his face.

"I hear you, Barton," Steve replied. "I'll put that arrow in myself before I hurt her. I'll never hurt her. Never."

Clint nodded as he stepped out the door. "I'll hold you to that, Cap." With that, the Archer disappeared up the steps.

Bruce stepped toward Steve, giving him a look. "Same here," he said, putting a hand on Steve's shoulder. "Don't hurt her, Steve. People might fear Natasha, when she's angry- which is always, but when the Hulk is angry, you better run. Granted, you can't hide from the Other Guy for long, because he _will_ find you. And he will _smash_ you. And once the Hulk is done with you, you have to deal with me," he said with smirk. He slowly removed his hand from Steve's shoulder, as he turned to the door. "The _things_ I can do to you. Some might say they're worst then anything the Hulk can do."

Again, Toni just stared as Bruce stepped out of the lab and disappeared up the stairs. And again, Steve had that goofy expression on his face as he pushed off the door. "Steve."

"Toni," he replied, as he stepped to her.

She looked him in the eyes. "You know this won't be easy," she said, thinking she could talk him out of this.

"You don't give yourself much credit." His expression fell slightly, but he still looked at her fondly. "I don't want easy, and yes, I know this won't be easy, but if it was easy, it wouldn't be worth having. I want you, because you'll challenge me. I know we'll fight, but everyone fights. It's normal, and I look forward for that, in fact," he said with a huge smile

"We aren't normal."

"And I love that too," he said with a wide grin.

"And what about the team?" she asked, thinking what this relationship could do when it ended.

Steve closed the distance between them. Paying no attention to her question, he stated, "Not changing my mind, Stark. I'm not going anywhere, and there's nothing you can say that will change my mind."

Toni eyed his movements as he brought his hands up and softly cupped her face. "Nothing?" she asked with a smirk.

"Nothing," he said, looking into her eyes. "Absolutely nothing."

Letting out sigh, Toni replied, "You're crazy."

"Only for you," he replied, pressing his lips against her. It was simple at first, a quick kiss to her lips, but he didn't let her to step away, as he tilted his head down, resting his forehead against hers. His thumb spiraled around, caressing her jaw. "I won't hurt you. I promise."

"But I might hurt you." It was raw as it came out. Toni wasn't afraid of him hurting her. She was afraid of hurting him.

"You won't."

"You're sappy."

"Only with you," he said, smiling. "We're going to do this together."

"Big Sap." She let out a chuckle, as she reached up and placed her hands his wrists. "Fine, but it doesn't mean I'm letting you call the shots. I wear the pants in this relationships."

Steve gave her a look as he laughed loudly. "Oh, really?"

"Really," she said, her hands dropping to his chest. She was amazed at how easily he could change her mood with that stupid grin of his. It was magic or something.

His hands dropped to her waist, holding her close. "Well, I am a Captain."

"Pulling rank on me, _Sir_?" she asked, playing along.

Steve leaned his head forward. "Well, I do outrank you, Corporal Sark."

Letting out a loud laugh, she threw her head back. "Oh, how I'll enjoy disobeying your orders, _Captain_ , and if you call me Sark again, I will punch your lights out."

"Disobeying orders and assaulting a superior Officer, Sark?" he said, refusing to let go. "That would land you in the brig."

Toni felt her eye twitch. "And are you going to send me there, Rogers?" she asked, still playing the game. A game she would win. "And leave yourself alone? Maybe, I'll have some fun in the brig, while you're all _alone_."

Steve smiled. "Well, we wouldn't want that," he said.

"What do you suggest?" she asked.

"That you kiss me."

"Why, Captain, that would be inappropriate!" she protested, loudly. "What would people say?" Everything that Toni had thought before had flown out the window as she stared in Steve's eyes. She could get lost his eyes for years, seeing how happy he was. Sure, she had seen Steve happy before both in the past and present, but this was a different level of happiness.

"Does it matter?" He inquired, as his smile turned into a smirk. "Captain America gets what he wants, and he wants you. He wants to be there through it all. Good and the bad."

She let out a loud laugh, because he was going to be death of her in some way, shape or form. When this ended, she was going to be crushed, but at the moment, she didn't care. She just wanted to remain in his arms for as long as she could. "Oh, he does? W-"

Toni was unable to finish as Steve cut her off with a kiss. This kiss was deeper than the last, and it stole her breath, which shouldn't be allowed. He shouldn't be allowed to do with to her, leave her speechless. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair at all.

When he pulled away, he smiled, "If it makes you feel better, you do the same to me."

"D-Did I say that aloud?"

"No, but I know that look," he said, knowingly. "And I feel the same." Toni didn't have a chance to respond as Steve captured her lips again with a deep kiss. Dropping to her waist, his hands settle just above her hips, disappearing under her sweater. He had a tight hold on her as he sucked on her bottom lip.

When did Steve become so good at kissing? Seriously, how? Who the hell was he kissing? He had to be practicing, because there was no way her Shrimp was this good. Before the serum, he was a small, awkward man, who couldn't get a girl, a _Dame,_ to talk to him, and after the serum, he was at war, so when did he have a chance to make out with anyone? Well…. There were the show girls when he was a chorus boy. Was Steve a bad chorus boy? How bad-

"Miss," JARVIS called, interrupting the two.

Annoyed and frustrated, Toni pulled from Steve, but she kept a good grip on him. "What?" she asked, her lips swore. Again, where did Roger learn how to kiss? She needed to thank that woman, unless it was Peggy. If so, it would be weird. Really weird.

"Miss Potts is on the line and wishes to speak with you," the AI replied.

Not moving from Steve, Toni let out a sigh. "Just tell her I'm not here!" she said, wanting to get back to kissing _her_ Captain.

"I am sorry, Miss, but Miss Potts demands to speak with you. She will not take no as an answer," JARVIS replied.

What else did her CEO have to say? Toni thought they had made their peace and had come to an understanding, so why was Pepper calling now? Did she change her mind? Was she quitting? Ending everything? Was she giving up completely? Toni just thought she just needed space, but did she want more than just space? "Fine, put her through, but it better be important. She's interrupting my special time with Stevie, and I need my special time!"

Steve laughed as Potts was patched through. "Toni," he said softly with fondness.

"Toni," the CEO yelled, sounding annoyed.

"Hey, Pep," Toni greeted as cheery as ever. Was this the end of them? "How can I help you? Make it quick. You're interrupt my special time with Rogers."

Pepper didn't respond right away, taking a few long seconds to say anything. "…Please tell me your dress. Please tell me I didn't call you during sex! Not again. Who answers the phone during Sex?"

"Again?" Steve uttered, softly, as he eyed her.

Toni laughed as Steve turned bright red. "Unfortunately, Stevie and I are fully dressed," she replied, tugging at Steve's cotton blue shirt. "But we can fix that."

"Toni," Steve uttered, trying to control his blush. There was a soft warning on his voice.

"Toni!" Pepper scorned.

The Genius let out a chuckle as she stepped out of Steve's arms. She eyed his cherry red face, and she couldn't help but smile. He was so adorable, and she loved it. "Geez, can't have any fun. What can I help you with, Pep?" Even if Toni couldn't see the CEO, she knew she was rolling her eyes.

"A warning!" Pepper replied, loudly.

"Warning about what?" Toni asked, still eyeing Steve.

Pepper let out a harsh sigh. "A warning about you and Captain Rogers. The Media is having a field day with this."

A light bulb went off in her head, not realizing how big that photo had gotten. Sure, Fury was one thing, but Pepper was another. How big did this photo get? She thought Fury was being Fury, when he said all gossip sites. "JARVIS," Toni called. "Run a search on Captain Rogers and me. I want to see how many hits we're getting."

The blush had finally died down on Steve's face. "Hits?" he asked, eyeing Toni.

It took only a few seconds for JARVIS to answer. "You and Captain Rogers are trending. One million hits and counting."

Pepper let another harsh sigh. "You're giving me a headache and you just got back, Toni. You should read the articles. Some suggest that you and Steve eloped during your disappearance. Eloped!"

Toni laughed loudly. "Don't these people have anything else to worry about?!" she whined, pouty.

"I'm already fielded calls from the Board, Toni," Pepper said, aggravated.

The board? Did they have nothing better to do than to worry about her love life? Toni let out a smile—She had a love life. A legit love life. "Tell them to mind their own damn business," she said.

"Then there're the calls from the reporters," Pepper added. "They're like sharks who smell blood in the water. A warning would've been nice!"

Toni knew she was angry, and she _had_ a point, but Toni wasn't ready to reveal what they had yet. She wasn't ready to open this up to the world. She wanted to keep it between her and Steve, but it was impossible now. Now, everyone would be waiting for her to screw up as it would be her to do so. "Sorry, Pepper. Yes, I should've told you."

"Yes, you should have, but I'll deal with it," Pepper replied. "But you owe me."

"Like a weekend getaway?" Toni said smiling. She knew how to get on CEO's good side, well some times. Right now, Pepper was stressed and needed time off, which was why Toni wanted to give her a vacation. When Pepper didn't respond, she added. "A week?" Still, no answer. "…A month?"

"Yes, I like that idea," Pepper replied. "And you have to deal with SI while I'm gone. You get to be CEO for that month."

Toni couldn't help but groan, as she could imagine how painful that was going to be. "Fine."

Pepper laughed. "And, Steve," she called, still laughing.

Steve looked up at the sound of his name. "Yes?" he asked, unsure of himself.

"I'm sure that Bruce had given you a talking to and James will be giving you one soon, but if you hurt her, I'll dump you where no one can find you. I'll leave you alive but alone with nothing. Nothing. I'll leave to suffer in some desert with no chances of getting back. You got that, Captain?" she asked, calmly. Her voice was calm, which made her threat all the more deadly.

However, there was a smile on his face. "No worries, Miss. Potts. I will not. I promise."

Toni was in shock, never expecting for Steve to get so many shovel talks. She was expecting to get them instead, granted she hadn't seen Romanoff yet. There was no telling what that woman would say to her, or do to her.

"Good," Pepper replied. "Now, I have to put a stop to this hail storm. Toni, don't do anything else, until this thing calms down. You got it?"

"I got it."

"Behave, Toni, and take care of her, Steve, since I can't. I'm counting on you."

"Hey!" Toni protested. She could feel her heart ping as she heard the words: _since I can't._

Steve laughed again. "I won't let anything happen to her." With that, the call disconnected, leaving Steve and Toni alone. "I mean it, Toni. I won't let anything happen to you."

"Still wearing the pants in this relationship," Toni replied, smiling. She turned to the monitors and started to flip through the articles that JARVIS had pulled up.

Not allowing a good look at the articles, Steve crossed to her, pulling her away from the monitors. "We both can wear the pants," he said into her hair line. "Now, let's get going."

Toni glanced up at him. "Going where?" she asked, eyeing him.

"Camp Lehigh. You said you wanted to check something out, so let check it out. Together, Toni."

She glanced back at the monitor, catching sight of the image of her in Steve's arms. She looked crappy in her tan cargo pants, but she was glowing in Steve's arms. She knew it was visible to anyone looking, and the media would be talking about it for a while. Who wouldn't be talking about Captain America and Iron Man locking lips? Who wouldn't be interested? She knew people would have lots to say, good and bad. Most bad when referring to her. "Let's go." She knew she would be scanning the articles later, reading it all obsessing over the bad.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

He didn't have a name, and if he did, he didn't know it, but his name wasn't important. He wasn't important. No one cared if he was injured or killed, unless it affected the mission. He was a nobody to the world and only important if he finished his missions, his assignments. If he failed, he was punished and punished severely. If he spoke without permission, he was punished. If he didn't obey, he was punished. If he wasn't quick enough, he was punished. He was just a tool, an asset to his handlers, and he accepted this.

Because of that, he did his tasks assigned to him without question. He didn't care who he killed or hurt. He didn't care if he was hurt. It was all about the mission, all about completing his goal. It was about pleasing his handlers. His pleasure or happiness weren't a factor or important, and it was killed the second he showed any interest besides killing. They were taken before they could grow, leaving him feeling empty. Empty all the time.

It was that emptiness that filled him every moment of every day, but after one of his kills, that changed. For once, he thought something as one of his targets was familiar to the Asset. It felt like he knew this man, but that didn't stop the Asset from killing him. There wasn't even blink of hesitation in his man. He didn't allow this familiarity to stop him, even if it made him wonder who this man was. Did he know this man? If so, how?

In all regards to all of his assassinations, this familiar man was an easy kill, unlike the others. The others at least had put up a fight, screaming and struggling, but this man seemed to have accepted his death as if he knew it was coming. He just let it happen, just let the Asset kill him, as the Asset watched the light disappear from the man's eyes. He didn't say a word.

After the man's dead, the Asset turned to leave, but as he stepped away, something caught his eyes. There was something sticking out of the dead man's coat, and the Asset couldn't help his growing, forbidden curiosity. He knew he would be punished for it, as curiosity wasn't allowed. It was forbidden, punishable, as it created questions, and questions were wrong. He was broking the rules by taking the items from the man's coat. However, he couldn't help it.

Out of the three items, there was only one that he cared about. Only one grabbed his attention and flipped some switch in his head. Allowing the other items to fall to the ground, he stared at the remaining image. He recognized the younger vision of the man he had killed in the photo, but it was the woman next to him that caught his attentiin. He froze when he noticed her. There was an undeniable pull to her, and the urge to hunt her down was great, overwhelming. He had no idea of who she was or even if she was still alive, but there was something at the back of his head, telling him that he _had_ to find her, even if it went against everything that his handler taught him.

However, his conditioning was far too great for him just to take off and find this woman, whoever she was. He had to return to his handler to report the kill, but he saw nothing wrong with taking the photo. It didn't go against the mission's objectives, so he pocketed the picture before returning to the base. For a while, she was the only thing he could think of, as he pondered who she was and how to find her. And, she was the only thing on his mind for years.

Years after killing the familiar man and stealing his photo, the Asset wasn't sure of anything besides the countless bodies that he had dropped. Time meant nothing as it flew by, and all of those deaths meant nothing. Even after the chair, he remembered and only cared about that picture. Nothing mattered, besides that picture, even if he had no idea of why. That picture of the unknown woman meant everything to him, even if he knew nothing about her. That picture was the most important thing he owned, even if he could no longer remember where he got it from.

It had started to be an obsession to him, always keeping the photo close and safe. He took it everywhere with him, even if he still had no idea of who the woman was. Even after the chair and pain, he refused to let go of it. Refused to let her go. He wasn't sure what that _it_ was, but he had to hide it, to keep it safe, which would keep her safe, and it was what he did for years.

The Asset couldn't recall how many years later it was before his handler finally found the picture, but he remembered the pain. The punishment was severe. He could assume it was due to the fight that he put up when the handler took the photo. He may have killed a few of his handler's guards, but he couldn't recall. He was focused on _her_ , and after the countless mind wipes, there should've been no reason why he remembered her, but he did. He didn't know her name, but that didn't matter, he fought. He fought everyone.

After they restrained him and a few additional, long, painful treatments, he returned to the field, killing even more targets, and for a while, he had forgotten about her. She didn't plague his mind for god knows how long, but while returning to the base after a kill, he froze, eyeing a news article. It was about that unknown woman. For a few long minutes, he stared at the image of her as all his desires came flooding back, and it took all that he had not to hunt her down. It would be easy now, because he had a name. He knew who she was. She was Toni Stark, and she was _his._

However, before he could reach her, his handler had collected him, and it took all that he had not to kill him. He was Hydra's Asset, but he wanted nothing but her, even if he didn't know why. He had no idea why this woman meant so much to him, and after another painful treatment, he completely forgot her again. She was nothing but a name to him. A name that his handler did not like.

Yes, the Asset forgot about her, but it didn't last. When he finally saw her in face to face, it came flooding back, and it was a struggle to obey his conditioning, his training. It was a struggle not to steal her away and disappear. They didn't speak, but his eyes were glued on her as his comrade held her, trying to awaken her. He couldn't look away, as he struggled to figure out why she was a trigger for him. Why did he want to kill his comrade for merely touching her? Why was he feeling anything at all? He was an asset. A tool. He wasn't supposed to feel. He wasn't supposed to care.

And he learned this a hard way when he was punished at the base for hours; however, he wasn't forced into the chair…yet. His memories weren't stolen from him…yet, but he was still numbed. His mind was still spinning, and it took all he had to remain standing.

"Who is she to you?" the Same Comrade from before asked. "I have never seen you act like that."

Even though it was a direct question, the Asset knew better than to answer. The Asset didn't speak. He didn't disobey, even if it seemed like he was doing. He did nothing but what he was told. Besides, the Asset didn't know what this woman meant to him or why he wanted her. He didn't even know who she was besides her name.

"Rumlow," his handler called. There was a warning in his voice.

"I'm curious," Rumlow said with a shrug. "I can't blame him. Even if Stark is a threat to Hydra, there's no denying she's hot." There was stupid grin on his face.

"She's a trigger," the handler replied with an annoyance and disgust. He was eyeing the Rumlow, over his last statement. "We have to ease his mind, whenever he catches sight of her. For some reason, she means something to him." He looked over the Assassin, studying his expression. "When Stark time traveled, she got into his head like all Starks do and missed with it."

"So why hasn't Hydra killed her yet?" Rumlow asked, giving him a look. "And what about the Captain? Is it the same?"

The Asset didn't move. He didn't respond or agreed. He wasn't doing anything. There was nothing he could do, besides listen. That was the only thing he was allowed to do, even if he wanted to do something. She was his, and this man was threating her. He did not like it, but he could do nothing. He was nothing.

"The Captain does have a certain pull with the Asset, but it isn't as strong as Stark's. And she's still alive because we need her alife." The Handler gave Rumlow a look as he turned to the television in the room. The Television was rarely off as the handler was always scanning the news. He was always looking for any hints of the Asset's work, not that he ever found anything. The Asset was taught not to be noticed, not to draw attention, and that was what he did. "Did you get the device?" he asked.

"Yes, we did, Sir."

"Good," the Handler replied. "I think it's time to get the Asset back in ice."

The Asset knew what his handler meant, but he didn't move. He didn't respond, just stared. His eyes were on the television and the images that flicked by. Rumlow nodded and replied, but the Asset wasn't paying attention anymore. His eyes were glued to the image on the screen as he noticed _her_ on it, but she wasn't alone. She was in the arms of a man, who looked vaguely familiar. He couldn't place him, but he was familiar. He felt like he should know him, but something in his brain wouldn't connect.

"Sir, you might want to shut that off," Rumlow replied, staring at the TV.

The handler glanced toward the image and cursed. "It's time for the chair," he replied, annoyed.

The Asset's hands balled at his side, ready to fight, as the familiar man took the woman into his arms and kissed her. He was to about snap and hunt this man down, as she was _his._ She was the _only_ thing that he considered his, his only source of happiness, and he wasn't willing to share. She was the _only_ thing he wanted. The Only thing. There was nothing else. Yes, he was nothing and deserved nothing, but couldn't he have one thing? Why couldn't he have her? Just her? He wanted only her.

She was the only thing he needed, wanted. If he had her, he would behave. He would listen. Would do whatever his handlers told him to do. If he had her, everything would be alright. He would be alright. So why couldn't he? Why did _that_ man have to touch her? Why did that man have to have her? He wasn't sure, but soon, he wouldn't be able to recall anything. Soon, he would forgot that woman all over again. Soon, he wouldn't have to worry about that man taking her from him as he wouldn't remember anything.

Soon, he was just asset again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End for now... Soon we will be getting into the IRON MAN 3/Winter Soldier story lines. Those will be fun, don't you think!
> 
> Anyhow, don't forget to tell me what you think.
> 
> And the ASSET...
> 
> And I must say, I miss Bucky. He has sooo grown on me. And geez, Steve and Toni are sappy.
> 
> Until next time. :)


	36. The Cat and the Dog

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all!
> 
> Sorry it took a long to update. Here you go the next chapter. This will be the last chapter in Part one of The Change Tide of Time. Don't worry. I have the next Chapter written for Part two. It is just waiting to be beta-ed. And again, thanks to my beta who is awesome. :) So as soon as she gets that back to me, i will post it.
> 
> But Here you go. I hope you like it. :)

**Chapter 36**

**The Cat and the Dog**

* * *

Being in her suit felt amazing and for the first time in a long time, Toni felt free-in control. There was no one to tell her what to do or how to act, and she loved it. She _loved_ it, and she had no interest in ever leaving the suit. For all she cared, everyone else could be damned, well besides Steve. He could be everything. Could be whatever he wanted… _Slow down,_ she told herself, refusing to think of a future. She was getting ahead of herself. Really ahead of herself.

She wasn't sure how their relationship was going to last- if it was going to last. How would it work alongside their team? There were reasons why loves ones in law enforcement didn't work together, granted she didn't know if the Avengers were even a team. How could they be a team? Just because they were 'living together?' Were they living together? Or where they just hanging out? Besides, what made them a team? Just cause they joined forces once or twice? Besides, didn't a team need to trust each other? She wasn't so sure they did.

Barton and Romanoff were SHIELD agents with strong loyalties to Fury and SHIELD, not her or anyone else. They could- would turn on her in a heartbeat because they were _ordered_ to. Ordered to! And they would do it without hesitation. They would tell Fury _everything_ because orders, and that got under Toni's skin, as she _wanted_ to trust these people, and that was strange for her. She wasn't one to trust people; she never wanted to before, but here she was, wanting to do so, and it annoyed her.

Next on this supposed team was the god—well, the not-really-god who was more alien than a deity. Toni didn't know what she thought of Thor, the man she barely had two lone conversions with. They rarely talked besides what was necessary, though she wasn't sure who fault that was: his or hers. Maybe, her meaningless flirting was too much for him? Maybe, it was her ego? Toni wasn't sure, but she wasn't going to push it. He was off somewhere, doing something, and Toni had no idea of where or what, not that she really cared to find out. If Thor wanted her or anyone else to know, he would tell her, and she wasn't going to bug him for it.

Then there was Bruce. Toni liked Bruce; he was quickly becoming one of her closest friends. She didn't know how she survived without him for so long as she could balance her crazy ideas off him. There was no judgement of any kind, and Toni liked that about him, but she still had no idea of what his goals or desires were. Did he want to stay? Was being here torture for him? Did he want to go? But most importantly, what did he want? Was he being forced into this? As she knew nothing about his desires, he was the wild card.

Lastly was Steve, who was a curve ball in her wide life. He broke everything that she ever thought as reality and threw her life into a spin. A good spin, but a spin, nevertheless. He had given her a different outlook, which she needed, but that scared her. What would she be like after this ended? She had no idea how long he was going to stick around for, as he would get sick of being stagnant. He was a soldier through and through, always looking for the next mission. He was put on this earth to saves lives, and he would save lives. He was destined to for it, and Toni refused to stand in his way. The Captain was a role model, and he was-

"Stark, slow down."

The sound of Romanoff's voice snapped Toni back to reality. "Not my fault you can't keep up," she replied back. The genius had no interest in slowing down. It felt like heaven to be flying again.

"Who decided it was a good idea to let Stark fly?" Barton asked in her ear. "She's like a dog off a chain, jumping and barking at everything. She's going crazy, Rogers." He chuckled.

"Ton-" Steve started but was interrupted. "I take offense to that, Barton. I'm not dog. If anything, I'm a cat!" she replied, imagining the looks on their faces. "Dogs are stupid, trained to follow commanders, but cats are smart. They listen to no one, doing whether they want whenever they want. They sleep wherever they want. They-"

"You sleep?" Came Bruce's reply.

Toni let out a sigh before she replied, "I SLEEP!" _Just not lately,_ she thought. She didn't voice that part, not wanting to alert everyone to the last time she slept. She also didn't want them to know that she had to be sedated either.

"Do not," Clint replied. "But I will say she's annoying like a cat. Only want attention on her terms."

Toni was beginning to wonder why she wanted to come back to these people. All they did was tease and her. "Hey, can you blame me? I can only handle you people for so long."

"Ouch, Stark, even Rogers?" Clint replied, with a chuckle. "I guess he isn't getting any."

Was it bad that Toni wanted to turn her comms off? Normally, this small talk-this teasing didn't bother her, but for some reason it did. It got under her skin in ways that it annoyed her. Maybe, it was because she wasn't in the mood. Maybe, she had other things on her mind. She wasn't sure what, but it only made her push her suit harder. It made her want to distance herself.

"Toni." Steve's voice cut through everything as it always did, catching her attention.

Steve was a dog, not stupid dog, but he was a dog, and dogs didn't mix well with cats. He was loyal, caring no matter what, unlike her. Only doing it when it served her. Suddenly feeling overwhelmed, Toni ordered JARVIS to turn off he comms, needing to be left alone to her thoughts.

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Toni touched down in Camp Lehigh with a light thump and scanned the camp before disembarking from the armor. Like she expected, the Camp was empty with her being the lone soul in the area. "What the ETA of the others?" she asked, wondering how much time she had alone.

"Ten Minutes, Miss," JARVIS replied in her ear.

"Good," she said, as she stepped toward the center of the camp. She wanted time alone before she got blasted with questions that she couldn't answer. "Give me a heads up when they're a minute out."

"Yes, Miss."

God, Toni missed JARVIS. How the hell did she survive without him? "Thanks, JARVIS," she uttered, stepping toward the flag pole in the middle of the camp. It had lost its solid, white colorings ages ago, and the rust stared to poke through; an abandoned American Flag hanged from the pole, untouched in years. The faded flag had seen better days as it had started to come apart at the ends. It was like the rest of the camp: forgotten. It looked like people just left, which was odd to the genius. She could never understand that concept.

After scanning the grounds one last time, Toni's eyes rested on the mound of dirt a several feet away. It was a loose pile of dirt with pieces of metal sticking out, which caught the genius's eye. Making her way over, Toni had one thing on her mind: making sure the device was destroyed and unfixable. However, as she picked up one of the shards, she felt flashes of her memories rush back to her, taking over. Everything came to an abrupt stop, and she was forced back to that foggy dream- or possible memory. Even now, she couldn't make out anything but shapes or colors; however, it felt like she was back there. She felt frozen, unable to do anything. It felt like pound of bricks had hit her in the face.

To make things worse, she was suddenly flooded with more memories, though some seemed more like nightmares. Nonstop nightmares that Toni couldn't control. Some were painful memories, while others were repeated nightmares she had. She kept seeing the bloody deaths of her loved ones, and with each image, she felt like she was drowning. She felt her breath escape her as the imagines sped up, and she was unable to catch it back. Each time she thought she would, she saw bloody bodies, and though she couldn't make out faces, she told herself that it was Barnes, her father, and everyone else she cared for. Even after everything, she kept telling herself it was her fault.

As time went on, she wasn't able to make sense of the rapidly coming images, which she couldn't stop or control. With small, shallow breaths, Toni felt like she was watching scenes from a movies, while having a drinking game. Nothing made sense to the Genius, and the growing headaches forced her to her knees. She could barely hear JARVIS speaking in her ear, saying something, but she couldn't make out any of it out. These bloody images were all she could think about, the only thing she could focus on.

Suddenly, the S.T.R.I.K.E. patch was all she could see, and she was unable to make out anything else but the yellow font. She wasn't sure what the patch mean or who it belonged to. It could've been a military patch, but if it was, why would the soldiers leave her alone in the empty camp? It could've been SHIELD, but Fury would've known that if a SHIELD team found her, right?

Toni's spinning head was throbbing as that memory started to replay, but it was like watching a skipping DVD that she couldn't control. She couldn't stop or slow it, and it made her skin itch. It felt like every part of her was on fire, and all she felt was sweat pouring down her skin. She could feel herself shaking as a tremor rocketed through her body; however, before she could collapse, she felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her and pull her into a warm embrace.

"Toni." The voice was calm, relaxing.

She could feel her the shakes start to die down, as she found herself face first in a man's chest. She could feel the memories fade as his fingertips gently stroked the skin on her wrist.

"Toni, I got you," he uttered, softly, as he started to rock her tenderly. "I got you."

The Genus felt safe in this man's arms, who she knew belonged to her soldier. "S-Steve," she called out, surprised at his presence. When did he get here? Why didn't JARVIS alert her when he was a minute out? Or maybe, he did and she didn't realize it?

"Yea, it's me, Toni. Are you okay?" he replied, keeping a firm grip on her. "Where were you?" he asked softly.

Toni glanced up at Steve, giving him a look. "Are you okay?" she asked, giving him her best raised eyebrow. "You're the one who clearly doesn't know where he is." She didn't mean for it to be snappy, but it came out as such, and she hated herself for it. Feeling guilty, she dropped her glance and stared at the back of Steve's shield secured to his left arm.

Steve didn't let go or finch at the sound of Toni's voice. Instead of loosening his hold on her, his grip tightened, firmly keeping her in his embrace. "Toni," he uttered. His voice was firm, ungiven, but soft. "I know that look. I have seen it a few times…Seen it on a few soldier…" He drifted off as he placed a kiss to her forehead.

She side-glanced at this chest, knowing to what he was referring to. He had probably seen _it_ on his comrades, and then, he was a soldier. Even though she couldn't vouch if his nights were restless or not in the present (the past, a different story), he probably suffered from _it_ to. He probably knew first-hand what she was going through. He probably spent many nights unable to sleep…like she did. If he was, he was doing a better job of hiding it.

"Tell me what you saw."

Toni wasn't sure how to answer that, even if she wanted to answer that. With a sigh, she glanced at Steve's blue cotton blue shirt and pulled at it, trying to get a good hold on him. "You have your shield with you," she uttered faintly.

"Didn't know what we would find," he replied, as he looked up and glanced around. "Have to be ready for anything."

From her angle, she couldn't see what he was looking at, but she didn't care enough to move. She was too tired to deal with the world, and her exhaustion was only growing. She just wanted to sleep, but the idea of sleeping scared her. If she saw the flashes when she was awake, she hated to see her nightmares.

He glanced down at the stilled Genius in his arms for a long second before he looked up again. "Collect whatever you can find and take it back to the tower," Steve ordered, transforming into Captain America. His tone changed.

"Tell me it's gone," Toni said into his chest. "Tell me it's destroyed." She needed it to be destroyed- needed it gone.

The Captain's fingers danced along the side of her arm. "Just pieces now," he said softly, holding her close. She was small in his arms, almost hidden behind his shield. He was looking around again, watching someone. "Get everything you see bagged," he ordered. "Quickly."

"We got it, Cap," Clint's replied. There was a slight annoyance in his voice.

Steve's eyes narrowed. "Just-" The Captain started, but he wasn't able to finish. "This is an interesting explosion," Bruce said, interrupting him. "I can't tell if it imploded or exploded. It's like-"

"You can study it later," Came Steve's bitter response.

Toni rested her head against his chest and closed her eyes. She could feel Steve's protectiveness rolling of him, and she couldn't help but smile. Even in her exhaustion and shakes, she could feel his fondness for her, which left her wondering what she did to deserve him.

"Easy, Rogers," Natasha replied.

Steve didn't answer right away, taking a few seconds. "Just hurry."

"We got it," Bruce replied.

"I-" Steve started, but stopped, feeling a tug on his shirt. "Toni?" he asked, looking down at the woman in his arms. "What's wrong?" Just like that he lost the Captain's voice, his voice turning soft. "Are you okay? Need something? Whatever it is, I'll do it."

Toni had an urge to look up at him, but she forced herself to look at the shield. "Can we…go back to the tower… and watch a snappy Disney movie?" she asked, weakly. She wanted—needed something to take her mind off everything.

"Yes, we can," he said, placing a kiss to her head.

"I'll probably fall sleep on your chest, and I promise I won't drool," she admitted, softly. She didn't know why, but she wasn't dreading the idea of sleeping in his arms. It would probably be the only way she would be able to sleep.

Steve smiled into her hair. "Oh, really? You don't drool?" he teased. "But a little drool hadn't hurt anyone."

"Are you a drooler, Rogers?" she asked with a smile.

He laughed into her hairline. "And you'll have to wait and see," he said.

Toni just closed her eyes and laughed. He knew how to comfort her, when she needed to do, and she had no idea of how. They didn't get along at first, and she hated him. _Hated_ him. The very sight of him annoyed her, but here she was, loving the feeling of being in his arm. She loved listening to his voice, his reassurances. "Are you sure you will last that long?" she asked.

"Let's get you back," he replied, as he started to get to his feet, bringing Toni with him. "You're cranky and negative when you're sleepy."

"Oh, shut up," she replied, as she used him for support. She was exhausted, and though she was standing a few minutes ago, she was unsure if she could now. "I'm not cranky or negative when I am sleepy. I am always cranky!" _And negative._

* * *

*O*O*

* * *

Steve kept close to Toni, and no, it wasn't because he was scared that Toni was going to collapse. He was just worried, worried what she would do if he left her alone. Even if she didn't tell him, she _had_ seen something, relived something in that camp. He knew the face, knew it personally. He had spent countless restless nights and quiet moments, drowning in sweat and panic, and he spent these moments alone. There was no one he wanted to burden with it, even others wanted him to. Besides, he was Captain America. He wasn't supposed to be weak, wasn't supposed to panic. He wasn't supposed to suffer from PTSD.

Seeing Toni suffering from it was a blow to his heart, as he never wanted her to feel that. He wanted nothing more than to protect her from it. He already knew she was suffering from PTSD, remembering how she was when she was rescued from the Red Skull. He knew it would get worse if she didn't talk about it, but he wondered if she would. Would she be willing to speak about it? He doubted it, but he couldn't give the subject much thought as the room was full of Avengers that he had to deal with, and they all avoided mentioning what happened at the camp.

"So what movie do you want to watch, Toni?" Bruce asked, sitting in one of the love seats in the home theater. It was a large love seat that could comfortably fit three if needed.

As if nothing happened, Toni was sitting crossed legged on a different large sofa. A huge bowl of popcorn was in her lap, and she refused to share it with anyone. "Have any of you seen _Up?_ " she asked, popping a few corns into her mouth.

" _Up?_ " Steve uttered, as he stepped toward Toni with glasses in his hands. That was strange title for a movie, granted everything was strange to him.

Clint let out a chuckle from his spot on the floor. "You just want to make me cry, don't you?" His head was rested against the side of a chairs, while his feet was hidden under the glass table. "This movie always makes me cry."

"Oh, honey, if I wanted to make you cry, I wouldn't need this movie to do so," Toni replied, popping a few more corns into her mouth.

Natasha let out sigh before she took a seat next to the Bruce. A second later, Natasha kicked her feet up into Bruce's lap, surprising the scientist. "No one wants to see that, Stark."

"…Yea," Bruce uttered, eyeing the legs in his lap. "N-No one wants to see that."

"You're all no fun," Toni pouted out, as she shuffled over to allow Steve to sit next to her.

"Control your woman, Rogers," Clint ordered.

Toni's eye brow rose. "Did he really just say that?" she asked, looking around. "Did he just say that? You control me? Pssh. Steve control me? Yea, right."

A blushing Steve placed the two glasses on the table before he took the popcorn from Toni. "…So why does _Up_ make Barton cry?" he asked, sticking his hand in the bowl.

Clint look up from his spot on the floor. "The beginning makes me cry! You will see, Cap. You will see," he said.

Before Steve could react, Toni stole the bowl back from Steve, causing the popcorn to fly. "Mine," she claimed, as she stuffed her mouth.

Shocked, Steve looked at Toni, who kept stuffing her face. It was weird to see her like this when a few hours ago she was shaking in his arms. He knew she hid behind a mask that she spent years putting up, but it hurt to see her hid. He hated that she felt the need to do so. He had the urge to reach for her, but he knew better. He had to let her come to him.

"Geez, Stark, not going to share with Rogers?" Natasha asked, eyeing Toni. Steve could see the worry in the assassin's eyes as she studied the genius next to him. He knew Natasha cared about Toni, even if she would never admit it.

"JARVIS," Toni called, giving Romanoff a look. "Start the movie. I want to see Clint cry."

Clint narrowed his eyes at Toni before stealing one of the glasses from the table. He ignored the glare from Steve. "I can't wait until you cry, Stark. Don't worry I will take video and post it on YouTube."

"Oh, you pain me," Toni replied as the lights dimmed down.

Steve eyed Toni for a few seconds before he turned to the movie. For a few minutes his eyes were on the movie invested on the emotional adventure of Carl, but the second he felt a weight against his side, his eyes were on the brunette next to him. The half-eaten popcorn bowl was on the table and Toni was curled up on the sofa, trying to get comfortable against him. With a smile in his face, he lifted his arm, and it only took a second for her to duck under it and curl up in his chest. "I got you," he said softly, putting a protective arm around her.

"I know," she said, her voice soft. "What did I do to deserve you?"

His heart skip a beat as he heard that. "No, Toni. It's what I did to deserve you," he replied back. He didn't know what he would've done without this dame—no, woman. In the past, she was always there for him when he needed it, and he would never be able to thank her for that. Never. "Thank you." He said, softly kissed her on the top of her head.

Lifting his head, Steve glanced down at her, expecting some kind of respond from her, but there was nothing. He was shocked to find her passed out in his arms. He knew she was exhausted; he could see it, see that she was fighting it, but he didn't realize how fast she would fall sleep in his arms. And he couldn't fight his smile, knowing that she could fall sleep so easily in his arms. There was pride in his chest at the thought of her trusting him enough to do so.

With an arm firmly around her, Steve held her close, ready to protect her from anything. It didn't matter what it was, as he was willing to do anything like protecting her from pillows, granted he didn't think it would be so soon. The second the movie was over, Barton picked up one of the pillows and flung it at the sleeping genius with a loud chuckle, but it never hit his target, as Steve blocked it with his another arm. "Barton," Steve sneered.

"What?" Clint said, trying to sound innocent. "She wanted to see me cry!"

"I'll make you cry," Natasha replied, giving Clint a look. Her legs were still draped across Bruce's lap, while she rested against the arm rest.

Clint gave Natasha a look. "What?"

"If you wake Stark, I will beat you," the master assassin replied. "And I'll take one of your own arrows and shove it where the sun doesn't shine."

"Okay, Okay," Clint replied, putting his arms up in surrender. "I see that I'm outnumbered here." He glanced around the room, scanning everyone.

"Even if Steve and I sat out, Clint," Bruce started, "you still don't have a chance." He glanced toward the sleep Brunette in Steve's arms. She was balled up against Steve with her head on his chest.

"I can handle Nat. She-" Romanoff glared. "-Okay, she'll totally kick my ass." Clint admitted, looking away. "Geez, you guys are no fun."

Steve was scowling at Barton, annoyed at his inability to take anything seriously. Did he not understand that Toni needed to rest? Did he not see the state that Toni was in at the camp? However, in his defense, Toni was the master of masks, and she seemed like a completely different person when the movie started. She was like her old self.

"We're pretty fun," Bruce said with a smile. "Toni just needs to sleep."

Clint gave Bruce a look before he glanced toward Steve, who was still glaring at him. The archer would've flinched under the stare if it wasn't for the fondness in Steve's eyes that followed as he glanced down at Toni. "Is this how it's going to be for now on, Rogers? Stark's ever present protector?" he asked. "Leave me unable to prank her again? Unable to do anything to her? How unfair is that!"

Steve didn't bother to reply as he gazed down at Toni. He was unable to stop the smile on his face as he stared at her. He really did think he was luckiest person in the world.

"Oh, Stevie's in love," Clint mocked with a goofy smile on his face.

"Shut it," Natasha replied, giving him a look.

"Just make sure you two leave a tie or something on the door," Clint added, with a wink.

Steve's head popped up, his eyes widening in confusion. "What?" he uttered, completely baffled.

Before anyone could answer in the room, the door to the theater opened and someone walked in. "It's what roommates do when one of them is having sex," Rhodes stated, eyeing the room. "I've seen quite a few ties on doors." After scanning the room, his eyes fell on the sleeping Toni.

Trying but failing, Steve tried to keep the blush forming on his cheeks. The topic of sex could always get him red in the cheeks, and no matter how often everyone brought it up and how many time he hear it, he would always get red. It didn't matter how freely it was brought up and talked about, Steve could never get used to it. In the 1940's, sex wasn't talked about (especially in front of the opposite sex), and if it was, it was talked about privately, not in the open.

"However, I would prefer you don't do that," Rhodes said, awkwardly, as he stepped into the room. He had a pained look on her face, as he eyed Toni. "…I don't want to…know…when and how often you and Toni…do… _It_." It was forced as he tried to wave it off.

"I can agree with that," Bruce said, finally resting his arms on Natasha's legs.

"So how many time have you seen the tie on Toni's door?" Clint asked, winking at the Good Captain.

The Colonel turned to Clint, giving him a look. "Toni didn't use the tie enough in college," he said. The pain looked was still on his face. "Could never tell when to trust it when she did."

"Walked in on something you didn't want to see?" Clint asked, laughing.

Rhodes let out a small chuckle. "Seen far too many things." He replied, not explaining. He turned back Steve, giving him a look. Being a trained soldier, there wasn't a readable expression on his face, and that was scary- a nightmare really. "So you're together, now?" he asked, nodding to them.

"Yes." Forcing back his blush, Steve met Rhodes' stare, as he wanted nothing more than to change the subject. He had no interest in talking about Toni's past love life. No interest whatever so. "And you not going to give me the 'hurt her and I kill you speech,'?" he asked.

Rhodes shrugged. "I think that goes unsaid, but if it's needed, I will threat you."

Natasha gave Rhodes a look, studying him. "You think those two will last?" she asked.

Steve forced himself to stare down at Toni, because if he looked at Natasha, he would be shooting draggers.

"Do you see her now?" The Colonel replied with a gentle smile. "Out of all the years I have known Toni, she has _not_ done this…well with anyone besides Pepper or me." He folded his arms across his chest as he fondly looked at Toni. It was clear how deeply he cared for the woman sleeping in Steve's arm. "This is different. I can already tell, so I do think this could work out…" He paused for a second. "Or could end badly."

"It won't," Steve said, quickly. He didn't care what it takes, because he would do whatever it took to make sure it doesn't. Toni was too special to hurt.

"I don't think it'll be on purpose, Rogers," Rhodes said. "You and Toni are like oil and water. Like cats and dogs. You're going to fight. Going to yell, and whatever this is shouldn't work, but-"

"Steve's the dog in this relationship!" Clint yelled, earning a glare from everyone in the room. "What? He is. He follows her around like a lost puppy."

After a long glare, Steve turned back to Toni to make sure she was still sleeping. He wouldn't be happy if someone wake Toni, and they would face his anger if they did. "So you don't think we're going to work?" he asked, eyeing Toni's best friend. He held Toni closer, refusing to let her go.

"Didn't say that," Rhodes responded. "I think you two will work out, so I'm not worried; however, if you do hurt her, I'll hurt you. I won't kill you. Can't kill a National idol, but nothing wrong with maiming you. I won't touch your pretty face."

"I won't."

"You better," Rhodes replied. "And when you two finally hook up, make sure to reframe Toni from referring to it as getting a slice of apple pie." Everyone looked at him on that. "I _know_ she will, and I won't ever be able to look at apple pie again, and I love apple pie."

A snickering Natasha and laughing Bruce caught Rhodes' attention as he turned to the chuckling duo. "Oh, Romanoff," he called. "When you give Toni the shovel talk, go easy. She's…" he paused, drifting off. "She…" He shook his, fighting against saying something. "…Without Pepper…"

Natasha simply nodded as she turned toward Toni, finally taking her legs out of Bruce's lap. He could see the fondness in the Assassin's eyes as she eyed the Genius. She might not be as close to Toni as the others and might not always get along with Toni, but she cared. Toni was a friend, a friend she would protect.

Steve smiled softly before he turned to Rhodes, eyeing him. As he studied Colonel Rhodes, he wondered why he was ever jealous of the man, who was like a brother to Toni—No, not like. Was. He was a brother to Toni, always keeping her safe. Protecting her from everything, even from herself. Without him, Steve had no idea what could've happened to Toni, but he knew it wouldn't have been good. For that, Steve owed Rhodes everything, and that was something that he would never be able to repay. "Thank you," the Captain finally said.

Rhodes gave him a weird look. "What for?"

"For taking care of her," he replied.

The Colonel smiled. "Just make sure you return favor."

"It will be my pleasure."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End.
> 
> And Again, I hoped you liked it! Hint hint. You can tell me how you feel in the reviews. Reviews are like candy that keep me going and writing move. This story has been a ride, and I hoped it wasn't too boring. I hoped you had fun reading this. I know i enjoyed writing it.
> 
> I also hope that you wish to continue this journey with me with Part two. I hope it have it posted in a week, so you might want to keep an eye out for it. Hint hint. You can clink the alert button to follow me or the series.
> 
> The Chaos of Time is coming soon.
> 
> Can Toni and Steve's relationship survives the events of Iron Man 3? Can you all survive of Iron Man 3? And if so, then how they survive a certain Winter Soldier that comes to town?
> 
> Until next time.


	37. Author's Note

Hey all,

I just wanted to let you know that I have posted the Sequel to this story. If you want to read it, please go to my profile. You will find the link there. I would be honored if you all decide to keep reading. :)

Anyhow, Part two of the _**The Changing Tide of Time**_ series punished, and it is called **The Chaos of Time**


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